Honey Heist 2: Electric Beargaloo

"Honey Heist 2: Electric Beargaloo"
One-shot episode
The thumbnail for "Honey Heist 2: Electric Beargaloo" (OSx22), featuring Brian Wayne Foster, Matthew Mercer, Sam Riegel, Liam O'Brien, Taliesin Jaffe and Marisha Ray.
Episode no.Episode 22
AirdateAugust 10, 2018 19:00 PDT
Running time2:46:13
Game systemHoney Heist
Starring
Brian Wayne Foster as Liam Las Vegas
Taliesin Jaffe as Waffle
Liam O'Brien as Cookie
Matthew Mercer as Trinket
Sam Riegel as Peddy Tuxpin
and
Marisha Ray as the Game Master
Links and related articles
Episode chronology
Previous
"Epic Level Battle Royale" (OSx21)
Next
"Liam's One-Shot: The Song of the Lorelei" (OSx23)
Airdate order
Previous
"The Journey Home" (2x30)
Next
"Talks Machina #78: The Journey Home" (TM2x30)
List of one-shots

"Honey Heist 2: Electric Beargaloo" (OSx22) is the twenty-second one-shot episode of Critical Role and sequel to "Trinket's Honey Heist" (OSx18).

Synopsis[edit | edit source]

Part I[edit | edit source]

It has been exactly seven months and 28 days since the Hazel Festival in Westruun, celebrated in 813 PD. Vex and Percy packed their bags and are waiting by the front door. They are ready to leave for their annual Vox Machina summer reunion vacation in Dalen's Closet.

Vex says goodbye to Trinket promising to return within a week and apologizing for abandoning him—the casino Scanlan booked for Vox Machina in Dalen's Closet didn't welcome bears. Vex leaves him in charge while she's gone, also arranging "plenty of treats" to compensate her absence. Trinket sniffs for treats, but cannot find them in the pantry. As he decides to search in the basement, Trinket encounters Tova in a blue blazer power suit, representing "High Bear Nation" (HBN) alliance of bears in Tal'Dorei. Tova has some concerning news connected with the ninja bears faction ("Bearacuda"), assigning Trinket and his former bear-companions a mission to deal with the troubles. The leader of "Bearacuda", Hatori Bongo, has taken control of "HBN's" main honey depot (Tal'Dorei's largest honey depot known as Fort Lox"). Tova warns Trinket that the mission could be dangerous, even lethal. "HBN" sent a few agents into the depot, but only Kody Yak was able to dig out any information and relay it through a Message spell—Hatori's plans to establish the depot as his main headquarters, disrupting the flow of honey in-and-out of the facility. While Trinket is gone, Tova promises to station one of her best men watching over the Castle Whitestone, which brings relief to Trinket, and he agrees to take on this task. The task requires the bear to clear out all of the Bearacuda's clan inside the fort, including Hattori Bongo by either getting him to surrender or killing him. As a reward, the bears (Las Vegas is an honorary bear) can take ten percent of the remaining honey stock inside the Fort Lox. If they fail, Tova threatens to seize all the income from the Slayer's Cake. Tova then directs him toward the vicinity of the Parchwood Timberlands where he can find the other bears.

Before leaving Trinket checks out Vex's closet, searching for a bag of holding, but it seems like Vex took all of her possessions with her. But Trinket finds and picks up an unidentified potion in Percy's workshop. After wandering the woods for couple of hours, they reunite. Peddy Tuxpin is noticeably much more distressed, comparing to the last time Trinket saw him (suffering from bamboo withdrawal). Trinket offers them to join the mission as in good old times, but now working for the government. They are reassured to now work on a legit side, but shook by the idea of infiltrating the highly secure Fort Lox. They feed Peddy bamboo from the de Rolo's garden and proceed with their task, assigning the heist roles:

  • Cookie is the Face
  • Waffle is the Brains.
  • Peddy is the Driver
  • Trinket is the Thief, again
  • Vegas is the Muscle

The party share their thoughts about their mission. Peddy says he's heard of the Bongo is bad business—he doesn't just kill his victims, he declaws them first. The "Bearacudas" remind Liam Las Vegas of running a few side jobs as driver under Vinnie the Pooh, transporting unmentioned goods. He was escorted by these bear ninjas through the Parchwoods.

The evening dimms over the city, and the bears attempt to sneak into "Nothing But Hats" store, intending to steal several hats to disguise themselves. The guards notice them and shout trying to shoo them away, but get terrified by roaring Trinket. Peddy attaches himself to a nearby cart, and picking up Cookie's suggestion, breaks rams through the front door. Las Vegas, remembering each other's hat preferences, slips through the wreckage and tosses out four hats (Vegas and Cookie get Fez hats, Trinket gets a cowboy hat, Peddy gets a green bowler, Waffle gets a gray bowler). Surrounded by the incoming guards, Cookie introduces himself as a lost tourist from Huntington Gardens and persuades guards to go on with their business. Before leaving, one of the guards apologizes for the recent bear outburst and gives Cookie a "Welcome to Whitestone" tourist patch, which Cookie immediately eats. They briefly return to the Castle Whitestone, taking two jars of honey. Waffle ravages the kitchen and knocks over a trench coat hanger, getting a special item.

The bear gang travels through the Parchwoods the rest of the evening and night, reaching a clearing as the sun rises. They notice bears adorned in white making wedding preparation, setting up decorations and various other arrangements around a wooden manor. They recognize it as Vinnie the Pooh's manor. Vegas brings Cookie with him to talk to Vinnie. Peddy is concerned that the two fezzes might confuse people that they're selling bibles. They pass hallway to double oak doors, a bearman in a slick back suit lets them into the boss' office. A golden-brown furred bear with black hair and a thin pencil moustache over his fur greets Vegas as they enter (Vinnie the Pooh speaks with a Godfather-esque accent). Cookie takes off his hat in respect to Vinnie. Vinnie the Pooh laments about Vegas' rare visits, lately, and his lack of respect to even call him "the Pooh". The Pooh asks Vegas the purpose of his unexpected and belated visit. Vegas says he came with info, bringing up his past job with the Bearacudas and Hattori Bongo. Vinnie recognizes the name, Bongo did Vinnie dirty. On top of the seizure of the honey depot, Bongo took over the underground Xhorhasian smoked salmon smuggling grounds. Vegas suggests Hattori is trying to establish the "POO" in the Parchwoods (Point of Operation), which irritates Vinnie, because there can only be one Pooh. Vinnie fully doesn't trust Vegas or Cookie as someone outside the family, but still offers them a path to Fort Lox in exchange for checking in with his smoked salmon smugglers. The Pooh expected them to come a couple of hours ago, but they are no signs of them (expected to come from a north-eastern direction). They kiss the Pooh's rings, and the party reunites outside. Trinket pockets some bamboo and some honey for later (two servings of honey cocktails). Peddy successfully requests a bucket of honey and bamboo sticks from the bartender. Cookie flirts with a waitress, getting a honey cocktail and convincing he's closely acquainted with "Vex'calias". Peddy steals a drink cart, inviting the rest of the bears to hop in.

Traveling north-east by the cart at the walking speed, the gang approaches another clearing and notices stone fort walls. They hear arguing shouts in the distance and stop the cart. Vegas recognizes Vinnie the Pooh's smugglers who are arguing with three polar bears. Vegas calls out to the bears. The polar bears want to talk about the "Polar Rising", complaining about the smugglers harassing them. The polar bears are convinced by Peddy he's a half polar, and turn to him. Their goal is to protest against the media portrayal of polar bears as weak and incapable to efficiently reproduce. They all agree that every time they hear about polar bears, the people insult polar bears' dicks. The "Polar Rising" collected signature, complained to "High Bear Nation", and were reaching out to Tal'Dorei Council, but no one listens to them. They had to create a game, which determines whether a bear is alfa or beta (they need to beta test it). The bear gang are concerned that the game is all about dicks. The gang agrees to play this game if they leave Vinnie's guys alone. The polar bears bring out a game.[fn 1] Peddy raises the stakes—if the party wins, they trade their drink cart with the polar bear's game cart. They agree to handle the distribution of the game. Some dicks have fallen, but the bear is still up. Cookie finishes the polar bear. The polar bears give them stickers that say, "I'm an honorary member of Polar Rising", and say goodbye to the party.

Part II[edit | edit source]

Back at Vinnie's, preparations for the wedding have progressed, and the salmon was delivered successfully. Vinnie the Pooh has been drinking heavily. He is pleased to hear about the completion of the task and welcomes the bears into the Pooh family. Vinnie then delivers on his part of the deal—he is aware of the smuggling tunnel, which he uses to get the salmon over to Hatori Bongo. The entrance into the tunnel is north of the fort, likely guarded. There is a five digit code that is changed every couple of days, but Vinnie doesn't know the code. He only knows the code alternates between salmon and bamboo. Trinket introduces himself to Vinnie and asks if Vinnie know of Kody Yak, but Vinnie doesn't know. They asked who is the bride's future husband; Vinnie isn't aware of his name. When asked by Waffle about Bongo, Vinnie says he knew Bongo when he was just a low member of the Bearacudas. Vinnie climbed the ranks in the past 6 months. Part ways with the Pooh, the bears stop by the wedding to grab a couple more cocktails. Waffle finds and steals bottle rockets. Peddy rearranges the jumbled letters of "salmon" and "bamboo" conjuring: "No Más Boom", "Moon Samba", or "Las Mambo".

Approaching the Fort Lox, the gang takes a wide berth around it. Peddy munches on bamboo to chase away the jitters, and Vegas sniffs for honey and pinpoints the draft hole, and a ninja bear is sleepily propped up against the hole. Trinket attempts to sneak up toward the ninja with Vegas on his back, but Trinket farts and the smell alerts the ninja. Vegas leaps forward flying past the bear. Trinket pulls a piece of bamboo around the ninja's throat, baiting Peddy to bite their throat off. Cookie puts on the ninja's clothes and finds the code in his pocket: "Salmon Bamboo Salmon Salmon Bamboo". There are two buttons on the key box: one is salmon, the other is bamboo. Waffle, as the brains of the group, starts with enters the code, and the door opens. Inside there are many boxes of honey, and Vegas starts consuming it. Trinket interrupts him telling him to not waste his time on the dregs. The hallway is too small to pull in the cart, and using wheelbarrows scattered around, Peddy makes an extra long bike. The gang reaches a fork in the corridor, and the motorcycle noises alert two ninjas, who drop down on them from the ceiling. Trinket terrifies one of the bears, whom Vegas claws through the eyes through his jaw, killing him. Cookie parcours to the other ninja, grappling him from behind. The gang interrogates him who tells them that Bongo's hideout (where the ninja says Hatori stores all the best honey) is to the left passage, then first right, second left, and to the end of a corridor. The ninja also tells them where they can find Yak—after the second left turn, they must take two more right turns. The ninja asks to run away without anyone saying anything, but Cookie chokes him out. Vegas draws a bloody dick on the bear he killed. Trinket takes the dead ninja's clothes. Waffle, Vegas, and Trinket all eat some honey.

The bears get back on their motorcycle and make all the correct turns. They call out for Cody Yak, a person answers. He tells them "they" changed his name to "Wagu" and have been training them to help Hattori Bongo. Learning they are Tova's allies, Cody agrees to fight alongside them. Trinket uses his silverware to unlock Kody's cage, letting out a big yak. Peddy reluctantly gives Cody some bamboo, which he hungrily eats. Kody has had a number of codewords trained into him, words he doesn't remember. He adds that there are shiny, loud booming noise-making contraptions being made. Kody leads them to a storage room full of crates. Vegas tears into the first crate and finds one shiny ball. Peddy sits on a crate, crushing it open finding a "pipe-shaped thing", and Waffle takes it. Trinket recognizes the item found as the items produced by Percival de Rolo.[fn 2] Peddy opens one other crate, finding a shiny now magical ball. Peddy recognizes it as such by reading the salmon-bamboo glyphs. When the party fished clearing out the remaining crates, Kody warns them that Bongo has members everywhere and can easily murder them.

The party set off toward Hattori Bongo's office, and Trinket picks up the lock. Cookie downs his extra cocktail, and the bears crash in. A big black bear in cloak and with a slicked-back hair. He recognizes Trinket saying that he has been watching them. Bongo is aware they are here to overthrow him, and as a counterpoint, he holds up a tiny vial of crystallized sugar inside of it. He introduces it as "Balootonium", affecting the bears' weaknesses. Bongo tells them the Harvest Festival was not just about controlling the honey trade. The Bearacudas were after the concentrated sweet explosive power of the "Balootonium", created by the crazed man from the festival. Bongo claims that even this tiny amount of "Balootonium" can destroy the entire depot and dares the party to fight.[fn 3] Waffle fires his gun into Hatori, meanwhile Kody Yak's eyes pop and he turns into a ninja bear.[fn 4] Waffle has hit the Bongo twice. While Bongo is distracted, Trinket steals the Balootonium out his grasp. Waffle another bullet into Bongo. Peddy asks for the gun and uses his magical bullet, killing Hatori Bongo.[fn 5] Trinket throws out his potion of fireball into the ninja bears killing all of them (Trinket goes full Criminal). The fireworks and leftover gunpowder go off as the bears get on the bike. Peddy turns too hard, as shrapnel in the back flies. A piece of crate gets caught in the spokes of the bike. The bears are launched. Trinket runs away from the other bears with the Balootonium vial, saying "I'm sorry friends, but I've got my own plans". He gives an evil laugh, overflowing with the power "Balootonium" has given him. The gang chases after Trinket, and Vegas catches up to him. The bears begin shoving honey into Trinket's face. Waffle gets the "Balootonium" away. The gang gets the honey back to Tova and the "High Bear Nation", complete with accolades.

Featured characters[edit | edit source]

Player characters[edit | edit source]

New[edit | edit source]

  • Bryce, polar bear
  • Hatori Bongo, black bear leader of the Bearacudas
  • Kody Yak, a yak agent of the "High Bear Nation"
  • Vinnie the Pooh, yellow-furred bear who operates a Xhorhasian salmon smuggling

Returning[edit | edit source]

Mentions[edit | edit source]

Behind the scenes[edit | edit source]

This one-shot was pre-recorded. On the Talks Machina aired beforehand, the cast said they would hang out in the episode's Twitch chat.[1]

"Honey Heist 2: Electric Beargaloo" was removed from Critical Role's official Youtube and Twitch channels.

References[edit | edit source]

Footnotes:

  1. Marish brings out Don't Break The Ice game board. Polar bear stands on the center ice cube, and four of the cubes have polar bear dicks drawn on the them. If someone either hammers the dicks or makes the bear fall, they lose.
  2. Marisha gives Taliesin a toy gun.
  3. Marisha brings out a statue of a bear with an open mouth and a ninja mask. Taliesin must shoot as many balls into the statue as he can. At the time, Marisha holds up a toy shield with a picture of two ninja bears as a blocker and moves it around.
  4. Marisha now has two blockers to protect the statue.
  5. Sam later says this magical ball has a power of ten bullets, but it'll destroy the gun.