Transcript:Rumble at Rumblecusp

List of Transcripts

Pre-Show
MATT: Hello everyone, and welcome to tonight's episode of Critical Role, where a bunch of us nerdy-ass voice actors sit around and play Dungeons & Dragons.

ALL: (high-pitched and silly voices) We play Dungeons & Dragons!

MATT: The evolution is something. Thank you for joining us. Before we jump into tonight's episode, we have some announcements to get through, beginning with the first of our two sponsors, which is tonight NordVPN, which means, it says here on the sheet, "We have another technoriffic installment of 'Nord by Nordwest:The Quest for the Ultra Codex Reloaded.'” (laughter) Which, apparently, is the title that Sam has now named these segments, so we'll just... You know what? Taliesin. Take it away, man.

TALIESIN: Thank you, Matt. (laughter)

LIAM: Look at Marisha.

TALIESIN: As everyone on the dark net remembers, blackwillow69@aol.com and Cryptonic Override needed a level 12 master hacker to get them out of the internet. And it turns out you're looking at one. I, FreezerBurn, spent 10 long years in nano-jail for electro-crimes against webmanity. But now I'm hacking for friendship. (laughter) You see, I'm an old-school hacker, really old school. My power glove is cranked up to Duck Hunt, but my secret weapon is my mega abacus millennium edition, given to me by none other than Pharaoh Ramses III. (beads rattle) Let's get jiggy with it. (laughter) (beads rattling rapidly) One, two, three... Damn it! Looks like they're behind a plex-folded, Fortran flamewall! Ha! Child's Play, part two. Flip the floppy, unmax the headroom, shoot the C++, and Baloo the TaleSpin! Ugh, no. Not even my cyber abacus can unjack them. This is a two-man job.

ASHLEY: (cockney accent) Oi, did you say two-man job? You-- (laughs) (laughter) You may've heard of me as the MadHatterson. Sure, me hacks on TV were mad fictional, but I wrote every script! Let's fuckin' rescue Laura!

TALIESIN: And Sam!

ASHLEY: What? Oi, yeah, of course, Sam too. Come on, let's use everything we got! (beads rattling) (laughter)

TALIESIN: I'm dropping code I learned in the Dark Ages!

ASHLEY: This binary sequence has plateaued on me COSTART!

TALIESIN: Gilgamesh itself invented the DDoS attack!

ASHLEY: The cube shall be...

ASHLEY and TALIESIN: Gleamed!

LAURA and SAM: (gasping)

SAM: Did it work?

LAURA: We're back!

ASHLEY: Yes! Everything is A-OK!

SAM: No! Everything's changed. There's a secret you all need to know, and I'll tell you, next time NordVPN sponsors our show. They are the highest-quality encryption for your internet traffic and to hide your IP and physical location, and it's the last chance to get their three-year deal for $3.49 a month. Go to NordVPN.com/CriticalRole and use code "CRITICALROLE" to get 70% off a three-year plan and a extra month for free. Get going with secure, super-fast NordLynx-powered VPN service now, and I'll tell you all what happened in the internet next time. Matt, hack to you.

SAM: Matt, hack to you.

TRAVIS: Oh my god.

MATT: (clearing throat) Thank you, Sam and everybody. Wow. And especially Marisha, who was really the key player in that narrative there.

MARISHA: I don't know why I had to be here. (laughter)

SAM: You could've literally shown up to work 15 minutes late.

LAURA: There's so much color on that screen right now between your hair and Ashley's jacket.

LIAM: I encourage everybody to watch that segment a second time to watch Marisha's subtle facial journey through it all.

SAM: Oh, Ashley, that was amazing.

TALIESIN: That was fantastic.

ASHLEY: I know, my accent, I really--

TRAVIS: You took us to another world.

ASHLEY: -- for a long time.

TRAVIS: We got New York in there somehow at one point.

ASHLEY: Yes.

LIAM: Fusion.

ASHLEY: I wanted to cover a lot of-- I come from everywhere.

TRAVIS: Crikey! Australia.

TALIESIN: Hack the planet.

ASHLEY: Hack the planet. Hack the--

MATT: And well done. Thank you, Ashley, thank you, Sam. Thank you, NordVPN. Our second sponsor tonight is our good friend since the beginning of Campaign Two, D&D Beyond.

TRAVIS: ♪ D&D Beyond! ♪

MATT: So for those who aren't aware, D&D Beyond has now added a digital dice-rolling feature to their fantastic online elements there. It's integrated into the character sheet now, so if there's any rollable stat in the game, you can go ahead and just click on it, and it will roll it for you, add the modifiers and give you the roll that you need, which is awesome and super-convenient, especially if you're having to play games online like everyone is, and having to roll dice, and that whole thing can be weird, and losing it and drop it and let the space... Maybe it's just me in my office. But you can start your collection now of digital dice with the new Archmage's Favor dice, a digital set with unique animations and sounds that pulse with unstable magic and unleashes ancient arcane magic across your screen with every natural 20. That sounds cool. Probably not dangerous at all. But check it out today at dndbeyond.link/CRArch, A-R-C-H. And thank you again, once again, for D&D Beyond for sponsoring our show all this time. For our announcements, Laura, you've got some things to mention.

LAURA: I've got a couple of things to talk about. Um... (triumphant fanfare) (clamoring) Take it off this super-cool hanger, hold on. (triumphant fanfare) (laughter) It's our very first CR polo shirt!

TRAVIS: Give it to me!

LAURA: For all those professional nerds out there that need to have a collar.

TRAVIS: Give it.

LAURA: Look at this!

SAM: Is there a lining in there?

LAURA: There's a cool-- It's, like, a upper lining thing. Just, you know, a little something something that we added for fun. (laughter)

MATT: A little secret just for you.

LAURA: A little secret just for your little polo. Hold on. Oh! A little contrast lining!

SAM: Ooh!

LAURA: So yeah. This is in the store. This is in the store right now in the US and the UK CritRole shops, da-da. (laughter) Okay, and then the second thing... (laughter)

LAURA: Then the other thing that I wanted to talk about is this box.

TRAVIS: Put out the flames.

LAURA: Inside of it--

TRAVIS: It's burning--

LAURA: (gasping)

SAM: Ooh, whoa.

LAURA: Oh! It's our Don't Forget to Love Each Other mug!

MARISHA: So cute!

LAURA: Right? So yeah, these are so wonderful, and these are now available in the US, UK, and the Australia Critical Role shops. It's got the same 11 flags as our updated t-shirt that we recently released, and six dollars of every mug sold will be donated to OutRight Action International.

MARISHA: Yeah!

TRAVIS: That's wonderful.

MARISHA: It's so cute.

TRAVIS: It's a good mug. It's a fair amount of coffee.

LAURA: You know how I am about mugs, so I wanted to make sure this mug was awesome.

MATT: Hell yeah. Thank you, Laura.

LAURA: You're welcome.

SAM: Good job, Laura.

TRAVIS: Oh, man.

MATT: And so I think with that, our announcements conclude, which means it's time for us to go ahead and jump into tonight's episode of--

TRAVIS: Too early.

MARISHA: We don't have a plan!

MATT: -- Critical Role. (cut off yelling) (water bubbling) (thunder rumbling) (explosion blasting) ♪ Role ♪ ♪ Critical Role ♪ ♪ Critical Role ♪ ♪ Critical Role ♪ ♪ Critical Role ♪ ♪ Mighty Nein ♪ ♪ Roll the dice ♪ ♪ The adventure begins ♪ ♪ They were always beside you ♪ ♪ Your nerdy best friends ♪ ♪ And the DM to guide you ♪ ♪ And they rise from the flames ♪ ♪ For the battles ahead ♪ ♪ Villains beware 'cause you're 'bout to be dead ♪ (dramatic music) ♪ They got magic and flair ♪ ♪ They got falchions and cunning ♪ ♪ They don't see over there ♪ ♪ There's a monster incoming ♪ ♪ Inspiration is waiting ♪ ♪ Rise up, don't think twice ♪ ♪ Put your fate in your hands ♪ ♪ Take a chance, roll the dice ♪ ♪ Role ♪ ♪ Critical Role (roll the dice) ♪ ♪ Critical Role (roll the dice) ♪ ♪ Critical Role (roll the dice) ♪ ♪ Ooh, ah ♪ ♪ Can you answer the call? ♪ ♪ Dig in deep in your soul ♪ ♪ As the legend unfolds ♪ ♪ Now it's your turn, (your turn, your turn) ♪ ♪ To roll ♪ (fire burning) (dragon roaring)

Part I
(laughter)

MATT: And welcome back.

TALIESIN: That works.

LIAM: Delayed reaction on that.

MATT: So. Last we left off: The Mighty Nein, after arriving to the island of Rumblecusp to set up the coming Traveler Con, now naught but probably seven days away. You discovered that a culture of people had been living here for quite some time before you arrived, worshiping this fire entity known as Vokodo, and an enchantment seemed to lay on the space that caused them to forget everything about their past lives and live here happily amongst their new society here in the village of Vo. With the aid of one such druid as their spiritual guardian, named Viridian, you went and spoke with this fire god who seems a little less godlike and a little more like strange, greedy entity that rules those on the island. You freed the mind, long clouded, of this druid and discovered her name is actually Vilya, apparently a druid from Tal'Dorei, and you began to figure out how best to possibly free the island of whatever this creature's influence is in preparation for the coming hordes of Traveler followers that are making their way. You then traveled across to the Heaven Falls, an upward shooting waterfall on the eastern side of the island, which seemed to contain behind it an illusory cliff-face, a bunch of ships that had been long hoarded away, apparently the vessels that carried many of the people that live on the island here originally and then were kept from sight to prevent them from remembering where they came from and how to leave. You nearly lost Caduceus, who was drawn in by some sort of magical enchantment at the tunnels that lead to Vokodo's lair, and upon fleeing, you made your way northward to the strange Ruins, a sliver, one of many, of strange segments of either this world or other nearby dimensions that came here, it seems, when Vokodo fled here from the Astral Sea for some reason. Unfortunately, you destroyed the spirits that remained at the Ruin, as opposed to seeking possible an alliance with them, but in doing so, also removed a dangerous aspect of the island that prevented people from going there, so not all is lost. (laughter) Gathering yourselves and beginning your trek backward past towards the actual volcano of Rumblecusp later in the afternoon, you begin to plot whatever your next stage of engagement with the dangers of this island may be. So as you return, you guys have begun making your trek back from the northern side of the island from the Ruin, at which case Vilya does mention, as it begins to grow a little more dangerous. "It's interesting. Since you've cleared my mind, I'm still kind of finding myself, but I feel I might be able to get us somewhere on the island rather quickly, if I've been there."

TRAVIS: How do you mean?

MATT: "Uh, getting to the Ruins, or places that I have not actually been or seen myself before, I have to travel the challenging way, but if I know of a tree that I've seen or been around previously--"

LAURA: (gasping)

MATT: "I may be able to bring us there, if we have a tree to enter."

SAM: If we have a tree? Your village is lousy with trees. You've got nothing but trees.

MATT: "Right. Would you like to go back to the village? Did you want to make your way to the Heaven Falls again? Did you want to make your way to Vokodo's lair?"

LAURA: If we can get to the village quickly, then we could maybe try to free the mind of somebody else and they could help us.

TRAVIS: Terra, the hunting leader?

LAURA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Kind of tapped out at this point.

LAURA: Oh. Am I, too? Maybe.

ASHLEY: What time is it?

SAM: Afternoon?

MATT: It's afternoon, after you guys have traveled out to the--

LAURA: I've got a 6th-level left.

TRAVIS: Just to be clear, it's like a teleportation? We just step in a circle like our friend can do, or--?

MATT: "It's a little different."

TRAVIS: Oh. A tree.

LIAM: How does the tree factor into it? Is it like a component for what you would do, or--?

MATT: "The tree becomes the door."

TALIESIN: Huh.

TRAVIS: The tree becomes the door.

MATT: "I understand that you may ascribe to the more esoteric arcane spell constructs. I, myself, tend to lean on nature and the elements to draw the intent, so."

TALIESIN: Hm.

MATT: "Just trust me."

LIAM: All right. I would love to see a tree turn into a door.

LAURA: Me, too.

TALIESIN: I mean, most doors used to be trees.

LIAM: Yeah, but that's a slower process.

LAURA: Some doors are made of stone.

TALIESIN: That's true. That does happen.

LAURA: Some doors are made of iron.

TRAVIS: I forget. Are we trying to drive to Vokodo before we rest? No. We're doing one more night, right?

LAURA: Yeah, we have to, because if we take a rest tonight, then we can all have a nice fancy feast.

TRAVIS: We could try and wait in the village. We could try to convince Terra, but also, Terra may resist and try to stop us.

SAM: Or rouse the village against us.

TRAVIS: Right.

TALIESIN: Hmm.

SAM: Once we do, with or without Terra, do we have a plan after that? Were we going to go in from the front and the back at the same time or something? Was that a plan?

TALIESIN: We thought that there was no sneaking up. I think the idea's to go in just as we were, and see if the element of surprise could just be our intentions.

LAURA: I mean, we can always try again tomorrow to see if our divine... people can help us.

SAM: You're so religious.

LAURA: You know.

TRAVIS: Yeah, well, we're going to try and get him out of his--

TALIESIN: I'm tapped for that.

LAURA: Yeah, but tomorrow.

TALIESIN: One week.

LAURA: Oh, it worked!

TRAVIS: Should we try and draw him out from his hot springs underneath the volcano?

LIAM: And what would be something that would tempt him out of his cubby hole?

LAURA: I've been thinking about this, you guys.

TRAVIS: You were what?

LAURA: Well, what if... You know how he has all those ships?

SAM: Mm-hmm?

LAURA: Well, when I was talking to the dragon turtle, he said he takes what he wants and he likes to have all of his stuff. He thinks he has the most stuff. So what if I were to just send him a little message and tell him that, you know, maybe somebody else out there has more stuff, and he's not as cool as he thought he was.

SAM: That's brilliant.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

SAM: That's brilliant.

TRAVIS: (clearing throat)

SAM: I remember, but for those who don't, the access to the shipyard, the hidden shipyard, is it accessible by the ocean? It has to be, right? How do the ships get there?

MATT: It is, yes.

SAM: It is.

MARISHA: It is?

TRAVIS: It is, but the tunnel through, in that particular tunnel, doesn't quite seem...

LAURA: Yeah, but he's a fucking dragon turtle. I mean, I'm sure he could bust a hole if he wanted to. Besides the fact, if he went into the area that has all the ships and he was like, "Fuck these ships, these should be my ships!" And was like, "Fuck you!" And then he destroys everything, don't you think Vokodo would come out and be like, "What the shit?!" And he would try to attack the thing that was attacking him? And then he would be out, and then we could all attack him there too, and then we would be fighting with the dragon turtle, and then he would be like, "Oh my gosh, I love you guys," and he would give us a ride home.

SAM: This is a rock-solid plan. I'm in, yes, correct.

TRAVIS: The evolution of that idea was staggering. I like how it ended with us riding the dragon turtle into the sunset.

LIAM: Yeah, he would also have to negotiate through a shipyard in an underground cavern and then go through tunnels, which were not that large. We had a hard time getting Caduceus out of them.

TALIESIN: Yeah, that's correct.

LIAM: So that was a bit of a tight fit, and--

LAURA: Yeah, but I'm sure Vokodo has a way to get out of his lair.

TRAVIS: Isn't it a maze under there? Maybe there are more tunnels we didn't see, larger ones.

LAURA: There's got to be something.

TRAVIS: Like, how did he get in there?

LAURA: Exactly! He has to have a way in and out.

SAM: We don't need the dragon turtle to get to Vokodo. We just need the dragon turtle to get to the ship.

TRAVIS: What would it cost? What would it cost for you to execute this batshit plan?

LAURA: A spell.

TRAVIS: A big one?

LAURA: No, it's just my Sending spell.

TRAVIS: Oh!

LAURA: I have so many messages I can send him right now.

TRAVIS: We should totally do that.

MARISHA: I mean, it's worth a shot. If it doesn't work, then we're no further away from our original plan.

LIAM: -- of walking in and--

TRAVIS: Yeah. We're not much worse off if nothing happens.

MARISHA: And it goes with that playing his weakness against each other. He's super fucking greedy.

TRAVIS: How long-- Oh, we don't know where the dragon turtle is, do we?

LAURA: Mm-mmm, but he did recently destroy our ship, within the last day or so, so he's close.

SAM: Yeah, he's within a day or two's journey.

TRAVIS: Okay. Well, that's fucking--

MARISHA: I'm trying to think if there are any other holes we're not thinking of.

SAM: Oh, of course there are, but you know.

MARISHA: Yeah. Should we try and steal a ship and squirrel one away for ourselves?

TRAVIS: It would be nice to keep one on the side.

MARISHA: Before they fight and destroy them all.

LAURA: But it's not like we couldn't get off of the island, right, Vilya?

MATT: "I mean, there are ways to leave the island, yes."

LAURA: Yeah, I mean, you have trees that you know of, right?

MATT: Yes.

TRAVIS: On the island.

LAURA: But you have trees that you remember from before the island.

MATT: "I know many trees across Exandria from my travels."

LAURA: Yeah! So we could hop into any tree!

TRAVIS: Oh, you can go to any tree you've ever known?

MATT: "That I've visited, yes."

TRAVIS: Well, fuck! That's way different.

MATT: "But you also mentioned that you're able to teleport as well, correct?"

LIAM: Ja, although I can only bring through so many people. It does not last very long. I'm not sure what-- I mean, there's all the people in Vo.

LAURA: Do you have a limited amount of people that you can bring through a tree?

MATT: "It's a very short time that it exists."

TRAVIS: How short?

MATT: "Six seconds."

TRAVIS: Ooh.

SAM: But that's how long Caleb's spell lasts, and we've managed.

LIAM: I'm probably more limited. There's only a small handful of places where I could bring people.

MATT: "True. Though I would say, just as a point of reference, for a lot of these people who live here in the village, if we were to free them of Vokodo's influence, there's a good chance that many of these ships are their livelihood. So even if we were to take them away from the island-- and I can't say this, because I don't know what their histories are-- that's a lot of money that we're destroying that these people may have worked for in their life, and it might be all that remains with them."

TRAVIS: Yes, but there's life and then there are things.

MATT: "That's true."

MARISHA: If they've been gone for that long, they're presumed dead.

SAM: Life doesn't need things to live. (laughter)

TALIESIN: It can be perfectly content without it. (laughter)

TRAVIS: I couldn't finish it. (laughter)

LAURA: I mean, do you think there's a chance that anybody that, you know, has been here this long, they may just want to stay?

MATT: "I don't know. It's possible."

LAURA: People have babies here!

MATT: "There's probably some who have only known their life on this island. We have children who were born here."

LIAM: Oh.

MARISHA: Even still.

MATT: "It's complicated."

MARISHA: Releasing them from Vokodo would at least give them their own free will to decide what to do.

MATT: "Exactly."

LAURA: Plus, they don't know that those ships are okay. For all they know, Vokodo destroyed them.

MATT: "The choice is yours. I'm following your lead."

TRAVIS: Sure, sure. There are plenty of trees. I mean, how hard is it to chop down a tree and make a ship? Pretty hard.

MARISHA: (laughs)

TALIESIN: I genuinely have no idea.

LAURA: Besides, you know, we don't even know if this is going to work.

SAM: Yeah, your Sending relationship with Mr. Turtle Man was iffy, if I recall, right?

LAURA: No, he really liked me a lot. TRAVIS and

SAM: Oh!

LAURA: Yeah, yeah. We had really good conversations.

SAM: Oh.

TRAVIS: How many times have you communicated?

LAURA: Pretty much, like,-- I just talked to him, like, 10 minutes ago, and he was like, "Oh, hey Jester, what's going on?"

LIAM: What is his name?

LAURA: Dragon turtle.

MARISHA: (laughs)

LIAM: Okay.

MARISHA: Yasha.

LIAM: D Turtle.

MARISHA: You've been very quiet. What do you think?

ASHLEY: I mean, we don't quite have a plan yet to fight him, so we might as well try this. If we can get somebody else to fight him, and I'm sure when he dies, everybody will start to remember things.

TRAVIS: The dragon turtle or Vokodo?

ASHLEY: Vokodo.

TRAVIS: Oh, yes. Of course.

TALIESIN: Will we have to fight the dragon turtle?

MARISHA: That's actually a good point.

ASHLEY: We'd have to fight the dragon turtle.

MARISHA: Or we could have to fight both.

LAURA: The dragon turtle will probably be-- Whichever one made it out would be weakened. Right?

TRAVIS: Weekend?

LAURA: In the weakened state?

TRAVIS: Oh.

LIAM: Well, what about this? Building on your idea, Jester, what if you send your message to your dragon turtle? What if we holed up into the shipyard and kept ourselves hidden, and we kick off a kaiju battle there, and while Vokodo is occupied with your friend, D Turtle--

LIAM: We attempt to-- You, and you, and I attempt to send him away while he's busy, rather than walking in and having all of his attention and ire directed at us. If it works. Maybe it won't.

LAURA: If it works.

LIAM: But if it works, we don't let your friend handle it all. We lie in wait, hidden, and then from the peanut gallery, we attempt to banish him away.

MARISHA: And you're talking about Guacamole? LAURA and

TALIESIN: Yes.

LIAM: Ja.

LAURA: And if it doesn't work then we just go in all on our own and try to fight a giant, almost godlike creature.

ASHLEY: Wait, but what do we do with the dragon turtle once Guacamole maybe is gone?

LAURA: Wait, what?

ASHLEY: What do we do with the dragon turtle then?

LAURA: Well, then, he'll have some ships and he'll probably--

TRAVIS: Lots of treasure, as well, on the back of Vokodo.

ASHLEY: He'll just stay in there.

TRAVIS: Well, or take it to his underwater lair. I think they drag ships down, and then take it to wherever--

MARISHA: You're sure he won't still have a personal vendetta? He's mainly just here for the ships, and not the murder side of it, right?

SAM: We will have done him a great favor, though.

LAURA: I mean, he'll get so much treasure from it.

SAM: Also, I don't know anything, but I'm going to confidently say that he'll probably only take out one or two of the ships. There's lots.

TRAVIS: Mm-hmm.

TALIESIN: I don't know. Transmutation tends to leave a sour taste. People can really hold that grudge.

TRAVIS: Wait a minute. Can one of you grow or shrink things?

LIAM: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Like, if the dragon turtle's a huge nuisance and it comes into the cave, can we (whooshing) shrink him down and go through the tunnel and then (pop)?

LAURA: We polymorphed him before.

SAM: Why does he need to go down the tunnel? To get him to Vokodo?

TRAVIS: Yeah.

SAM: Why does he need to go to Vokodo?

MARISHA: If Vokodo doesn't come out to fight him.

SAM: We're trying to get Vokodo to come to him, I thought.

TRAVIS: Oh, well, yeah.

LAURA: That's the goal. But if he doesn't...

MARISHA: And that means we're hoping he starts destroying a lot of ships, because that would ideally lure out Vokodo.

LAURA: Yeah.

SAM: Do we know, in our interactions with D Turtle, did he connect with one of us? Like, see one of our eyes and know hatred? Does he have an enemy among us?

MARISHA: We threw Jester and Caduceus and Caleb overboard and had them water-ski behind the ship.

LAURA: And we turned him into a little--

MARISHA: Turned him into a slug.

SAM: But do you think he clocked one of you?

LAURA: Well, I've been talking to him, so, you know.

SAM: But you could be the, like, "Hey, I'm on the ship. Come destroy this one."

LAURA: Hey, who's over here! Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, it depends on how we want to play it. I can try to antagonize him to make him come here. I can try to be nice to him to make him come here.

TRAVIS: I had another idea. I don't think it's as good. If he was fleeing from the Astral Plane, right? Which is where the astral dreadnought was from? Is there a chance that maybe using Major Image to conjure an astral dreadnought outside the volcano and have it be like, "Vokodo, I'm here to kill you!" Would make him run?

SAM: Can you do that?

TRAVIS: Yeah!

SAM: How big can your image be?

TRAVIS: Any creature that's big as fuck, it says. Those are the words. (laughter)

MATT: The official ruling.

TRAVIS: "Visible phenomenon "that is no larger than a 20-foot cube," so...

SAM: 20-foot cube?

TRAVIS: Pretty big.

SAM: How big was the astral dreadnought?

LAURA: Was it 20 feet?

MATT: It was a little larger than that, but you could make a slightly runtish--

MARISHA: Ooh, we could use forced perspective. If you put him far enough on the horizon--

LAURA: Yeah, yeah, yeah!

MARISHA: You know? And use one of the ships in the foreground.

TRAVIS: Astral dreadnought lite.

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah!

TRAVIS: I don't know.

MARISHA: They did it on Lord of the Rings. It worked.

LAURA: Yeah, you could totally do that.

MARISHA: Yeah.

LIAM: Potentially. But a creature who has little trouble getting into the minds of so many people, you'd have to question whether it would be easy to--

TRAVIS: Good call. That's fair.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MARISHA: I like the D Turtle idea.

ASHLEY: Yeah. I feel like it doesn't hurt to try.

TRAVIS: DT?

MARISHA: Yeah, DT.

LAURA: Should I send a message?

SAM: What could it hurt to try to lure a vicious turtle--

ASHLEY: I think it's a fantastic idea.

SAM: Yeah, what could go wrong?

ASHLEY: Yeah. What could go wrong?

TRAVIS: He'll thank us for all of the free-- They're intelligent. They strike deals with sailors sometimes. If there is gold--

SAM: They do?

TRAVIS: Yeah!

SAM: How do you know this?

TRAVIS: It's all part of the lore! I mean, there's one guarding Darktow.

LAURA: That's true.

TRAVIS: That's right, yeah. There's a percentage, a rev share, that goes to the DT. So maybe if we say: Hey! This son of a bitch has got all your loot!

SAM: Fjord, are you all right?

TRAVIS: Yeah, I'm okay. (laughter)

ASHLEY: You're saying so many words today.

TRAVIS: Yeah, we could say, like, "Hey, come get all the gold!"

LIAM: Your accent work never disappoints.

TRAVIS: Yes. Nothing but not consistent.

TALIESIN: Maybe a split. Partners.

MARISHA: Wait.

LAURA: A split?

SAM: Go into a partnership.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

LAURA: Like 50/50 (British accent) gold? Whoa. (laughter)

LAURA: Oh, no! What's happening right now? (laughter)

SAM: Technically, technically!

LAURA: Technically.

TRAVIS: Is the oxygen turned down in here?

MATT: No!

ASHLEY: No, I think I made the table go cold.

LAURA: Oh, god! (laughter)

TRAVIS: NordVPN, annihilating accents.

ASHLEY: Nord by Nordwest.

LAURA: Okay, okay, okay. Okay, so should I give this a go, then?

SAM: The only thing that we need to decide-- The answer is yes, but--

LAURA: Okay!

TRAVIS: Mm-hmm?

SAM: The only thing we need to decide is, are we going to approach Terra at the village first? Or should we put this plan in motion first because it'll take him some travel time?

LIAM: We don't know how long it will take for D Turtle to arrive, so perhaps we want to be rested and prepared and on location.

ASHLEY: Wait, did he take out our ship?

LAURA: In case he shows up right away?

TALIESIN: He did.

ASHLEY: So he might be close.

LIAM: Maybe it'd take him a couple of hours, or half a day or a day? I have no idea where--

LAURA: Well then, maybe I should send a message early in the morning, or I should send a message right before we go to sleep, or like--?

SAM: I feel like you should do it now, at least to gauge where is he?

LIAM: What if he tears into there when we are not there?

SAM: Well, just to gauge. Like, she could say, "Hey, remember me?"

TRAVIS: "How far are you?"

SAM: "How far away are you? You interested in some treasure?"

LIAM: Or you have a lead on treasure and will tell more.

LAURA: I feel like it's going to work better if I'm not sending multiple messages going, "Hey, guess what?"

TRAVIS: I thought you said you talk to him all the time.

LAURA: (spluttering) I do. But about other things, you know. So this would be, like-- He would probably see-- I don't really talk to him that much.

TRAVIS: Oh. Huh. One thing against talking to Terra, we're going to run out of components soon in order to do Greater Restorations, right?

MARISHA: I feel like Terra's kind of a wild card. We don't know how she's going to respond or act. I don't know. I say we stay here, see what D Timberlake wants.

LAURA: What? We go! We get Terra. We be like-- Because it'd be like you, Vilya, right? Where you were like, "Don't touch me!" And then as soon as we did, you were like, "Oh, hey."

SAM: (laughs)

MATT: "Do I sound like that?"

LAURA: Well, sometimes.

MATT: "Okay, all right. Sorry. Just a moment there. It could be. I don't know Terra outside of the village."

TRAVIS: Who was here first, you or her?

MATT: "Terra came after. But... what worries me, and something to be aware of even if we succeed at all this--"

TRAVIS: This amazing plan?

MATT: "This amazing plan." (laughter) "Everyone in the village works together well because they've known nothing but the village. We don't know who these people were before they found their way here."

MARISHA: Exactly.

MATT: "And we don't know who they're going to become when freed."

TRAVIS: Jesus, that's ominous.

SAM: So we could switch Terra and find out that Terra's a total d-bag.

MATT: "Or could be an amazing ally. I don't know, I'm just saying, my concern, having been through this process, is I do not know who these people are beyond their persona here at the village."

LIAM: Yeah, and on a side note, there could be some very awkward conversations between the people who have had children since arriving here.

LAURA: Yeah. Like, what if they have families outside of the village?

LIAM: Ding, ding.

TRAVIS: Ooh.

TALIESIN: Wow.

MATT: "Well, that's going to have to come to a head regardless, if we succeed. It's just deciding if you want to try and recruit aid from others. One, ensure how many of your components you still have to be able to do that. Because that's one taking away from a night or two's rest for us, and we don't know what we're going to get."

LAURA: (huffing)

MARISHA: Feels like too much of a risk.

TALIESIN: It's a big risk.

LAURA: All right.

MARISHA: For a little bit of additional aid.

LAURA: Let's just send that message to him.

SAM: To the D Turtle?

LAURA: No, to Vokodo. Yes, to the D Turtle.

SAM: Oh, thank you, yes. Sure, yeah, let's do it. Today?

TALIESIN: It's a wild card.

TRAVIS: It was your idea, go for it.

LAURA: (squealing)

SAM: Do you need to rehearse?

LAURA: Okay. Hey, dragon turtle... I think I got it.

SAM: (laughs)

MARISHA: Great rehearsal.

SAM: Good run-through. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Shot through rehearsal. (laughter)

TALIESIN: Felt that, felt true.

LIAM: I thought we were shooting the rehearsal. (laughter)

MATT: Vilya nods and tilts her head in the way that a dog that hears a strange sound does, like, "Hmm."

LAURA: We got this. You know what, this is kind of important. Maybe I shouldn't just wing it.

MARISHA: Yeah. Which tactic do you want to go with?

LAURA: I don't know which kind of tactic I want to use! Do I want to use a tactic where I'm like, "I just found a whole bunch of ships! Do you want them?" Or do I use the tactic like, "Hey. I thought you were a badass, and there's this other guy here that's got all of these ships. What the fuck?"

TRAVIS: Dragons are greedy and egotistical, right? So we should appeal to that side of it. So, like--

MARISHA: So, poke the turtle. Number two!

LAURA: Poke the turtle.

LIAM: Oh, boy. If I may.

LAURA: Yeah?

LIAM: Traveler be with us. Go ahead.

LAURA: Okay. (inhales) Traveler. Be with us. Okay. I'm going to cast Sending. Get ready to count.

MARISHA: Don't fuck this up.

LAURA: Okay.

ASHLEY: You got this.

TRAVIS: I'm never very good at counting.

LAURA: I cast Sending.

MATT: All right.

TRAVIS: I really should have a stenographer.

LIAM: Okay, it's for realsies now.

LAURA: Hey, it's me! You destroyed our ship, but don't worry about it.

SAM: (laughs)

LAURA: Because we know a guy who's got, like, a hundred ships here. I thought you... were--

SAM: Is that it, really?

LAURA: I'm going to cast another one.

SAM: Okay. (laughs)

MATT: How quickly after?

LAURA: Immediately!

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: -- supposed to be great and stuff. How come this guy has so many more ships than you?

MARISHA: Tell him where we are!

LAURA: We're at Rumblecusp, by the way. It's the volcano island. See you, maybe! (laughter)

LIAM: Do you have one more in you?

LAURA: I do.

MARISHA: Hey, hang on, wait!

LIAM: Wait, wait, wait!

MARISHA: Let's see what he says.

LAURA: I've got to wait for his response. I need to wait.

LIAM: It's a big island.

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

LAURA: I'll wait, I'll wait.

TALIESIN: See if anything comes.

MATT: So you take a moment, and eventually you begin to-- The Draconic language comes through, translated through the spell, so the ideas come to your mind through the divine channel of the spell, to loosely read as, "I took your ship. More. Where? I like it easy pickings. Partway home already. Interested, maybe," and that's all you hear.

LAURA: He's interested, maybe!

TRAVIS: Was it "on the way home already"?

LAURA: Yeah, he said he was on the way home already. (sighs)

ASHLEY: Maybe tell him there's lots of them. Lots of ships.

TALIESIN: Lots of them. Exactly where they are.

LIAM: Unguarded.

TALIESIN: Unguarded, and time is limited.

LAURA: Okay.

ASHLEY: Good, good, good, good.

TALIESIN: Because we're going to take it and run soon.

LAURA: Okay.

SAM: That's a lot to fit in.

MARISHA: What side of the island is Heaven Falls on? East side?

MATT: East side, yeah.

TALIESIN: East side of the island, behind the waterfall.

MARISHA: Behind the waterfall.

LAURA: With your spell that you can make people understand things, languages?

LIAM: Yeah.

LAURA: Is it only reading, or is it talking?

LIAM: Well, it's two separate things.

LAURA: Can you make me be able to talk his language?

LIAM: Tomorrow.

LAURA: Okay.

TRAVIS: That upside-down waterfall's not going to uppercut him into the stratosphere, is it? Like it did us?

MARISHA: (laughs)

TRAVIS: (wailing)

LAURA: He's pretty big; I don't think it will do it to him.

TRAVIS: Okay, just checking.

MARISHA: But that would be funny.

TRAVIS: We'll know when he gets there! (laughter) (moaning)

LIAM: Oh, wait. No, no, no.

LAURA: You could do it?

LIAM: I can do it, yeah. Because this is the same day with the "everything is cake" tower that we...

MATT: Correct, yes.

LIAM: Yeah, I can do it. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Good ref.

LAURA: Oh my gosh, okay, yeah! Cast it on me and then I'll be able to talk to him!

LIAM: Yeah, Jester, yeah, yeah, yeah... Hold on. I'm just looking through D&D Beyond. Where did you go?

LAURA: ♪ D&D! ♪

SAM: ♪ D&D Beyond! ♪ (laughter)

LIAM: Yeah. So he pulls out a little stone tower that you've seen once or twice, and I hold it up, and wave fingers at three points in front of your face and cast Tongues on Jester. So you can understand any spoken language you hear.

LAURA: Awesome, okay. I'm going--

LIAM: (American accent) Can you understand what I'm saying right now?

LAURA: What the shit?! What happened to your accent, Caleb?

LIAM: I don't have an accent. (laughter) This is flawless Zemnian.

LAURA: Does that mean I'm speaking Zemnian? (American accent) Does that mean I'm speaking Zemnian? (laughter)

LIAM: (German accent) Is that what I sound like most of the time?

SAM: Yeah, like sort of a Baltimore thing. (laughter)

LIAM: Is that in the Empire?

SAM: Yeah.

ASHLEY: It does sound just like that, though. That's weird.

LIAM: Well, it suits you.

LAURA: (laughs) Thank you. (laughter)

SAM: Say water. How do you say water?

LAURA: Water. (laughter)

SAM: I was expecting-- ASHLEY and

SAM: Wudder.

LIAM: The accent... it's cute. (laughter) It's complicated.

LAURA: I'm speaking Zemnian right now. Can you understand me, Fjord?

TRAVIS: Feel like she's spitting at me.

MARISHA: She sounds really angry, right?

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MARISHA: I think she's pissed at you.

LAURA: (Jester's accent) Okay, I'm going to send a message to the turtle.

TALIESIN: What are the points?

LAURA: Okay, the points are: Easy pickings. I'm going to say-- Okay, okay, okay, okay. I'm going to say, lots of ships unguarded. Behind the upside-down waterfall.

MARISHA: East side of the island.

LAURA: East side of the island, upside-down waterfall.

TALIESIN: Time is limited.

LAURA: Time is limited, 'cause these things are moving out!

TALIESIN: We're taking them tomorrow.

LAURA: Okay, well...

TALIESIN: Taking them tomorrow afternoon.

TRAVIS: Tomorrow morning.

TALIESIN: Tomorrow morning.

LAURA: Okay.

SAM: Your accent sounds like a British actor trying to do an American accent. It's really cool.

TRAVIS: Yeah, yeah.

TALIESIN: (exaggerated American accent) I don't know what you mean. (laughter)

TRAVIS: (same accent) Hamburger.

ASHLEY: (same accent) Hamburger.

SAM: (same accent) I'm an American fighter pilot. (laughter) Kind of sounds like us.

LAURA: Okay, okay. Going to cast Sending.

MATT: All right.

MARISHA: You got this.

LAURA: There's lots of ships, unguarded, on the east side, behind the upside-down waterfall. But move fast, 'cause these things are flying off the shelves tomorrow! (laughter) (applause)

TALIESIN: Wow.

MATT: The response comes. And why would you tell me this after destroying your ship and you left me an slimy slug? I chased for days for vengeance." That's the end of his response.

MARISHA: Wow.

TALIESIN: Do we have another message?

MARISHA: You're right. They can still hold a grudge.

LAURA: Oh, wait.

MARISHA: Getting transformed--

LAURA: Not if I want to do Heroes' Feast tonight.

TALIESIN: Oh.

LAURA: I got nothing.

TRAVIS: That's all right. You've got to leave them wanting more.

ASHLEY: Yeah, it's like it's a--

LAURA: Maybe he's going to be curious.

TRAVIS: Don't call him back after the first date.

MATT: The tone-- while the voice sounds guttural, he doesn't sound like he's shut you down. He's just being careful.

LAURA: Yeah, understandably.

MATT: While he's not an ancient dragon in intelligence per se, he's lived long enough and dealt with enough of different dubious minds and deals and such that you get the sense that he's at least being careful. Smart enough not to just walk into a trap because someone told him to.

LAURA: Right.

ASHLEY: I mean, worst comes to worst, we could totally fight D-Turts and Vokodo. We're strong enough to do that.

TRAVIS: At the same time?

SAM: I don't... Are you joking right now?

ASHLEY: Yes. (laughter)

SAM: Your expression never changes, not even a little.

ASHLEY: No, I've been told I have a very dry sense of humor.

TRAVIS: Delivery is--

SAM: Wow!

TRAVIS: -- quite plain.

SAM: Just one-liners.

ASHLEY: Yeah, yeah.

LIAM: Also, if I may, with the evolution of this dragon's name, I would recommend we call him Dieter.

LAURA: Dieter!

MARISHA: Dieter?

LIAM: Dieter.

SAM: Dieter.

MARISHA: D-turd?

TALIESIN: Deter.

LIAM: Dieter.

LAURA: No, Dieter.

TALIESIN: Dieter.

TALIESIN: What does Dieter mean in Zemnian?

LIAM: It's just a name.

TRAVIS: Oh, well, great.

LIAM: It means dragon turtle.

TALIESIN: Ah, convenient.

MARISHA: I do like D-Turts, though. That's fun, too. That feels like he's a cool guy. He's a cool turts.

TALIESIN: Bit informal.

LIAM: I would not know.

MARISHA: Let's go party at D-Turts'.

SAM: So, we've put the invitation out. Now what do we do?

TALIESIN: We don't have one more Sending, do we?

LAURA: I could send a message in the morning, but...

MARISHA: Well, maybe that's good. Maybe then we can gauge it in the morning.

TRAVIS: "Oh, man, you guys. People are here early! There's a line outside. You better hurry!" (laughter) This is great! What a good plan.

ASHLEY: I think it's a good plan.

TRAVIS: We're going back to the village tonight?

SAM: I don't know.

TALIESIN: I wouldn't.

LAURA: Or do we just sleep here? Because, you know, the thing is, there's always a chance that Guacamole could get in everyone's heads a little bit stronger and they could attack us.

MARISHA: Yeah.

LAURA: Maybe he can take control of people. Like, who knows what he can do?

SAM: Would it be helpful at all to have our own crew mates with us on this journey?

TRAVIS: Ooh. You mean Orly and Marius?

TALIESIN: They're a bit squishy.

LIAM: Yeah.

SAM: Well, yes, but, I mean, as a distraction or something.

ASHLEY: Marius would surely die instantly.

TRAVIS: That's a little harsh.

SAM: Well, or because we're going to be commandeering a whole bunch of vessels, possibly.

MARISHA: Another interesting point. We're going to have to kill Vokodo in order for them to remember us.

TALIESIN: Yep.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: "Well, they've only been here for a day. "We can't be certain until we get to them." (laughter)

TRAVIS: Why? Oh, shit!

MARISHA: Oh, shit, ahh!

MATT: "Regardless, if we're relying on my capabilities to bring us close to the outside of the mountain, whether it be near the Heaven Falls or the first entrance that I took you, that expends the most powerful magic I have at my disposal that day."

SAM: Got it.

LAURA: Oh, so do it tonight.

SAM: So we should go where we're going to and halt.

MATT: "Or, if it works best, I can take you the day of. Just know, that does diminish my capabilities somewhat."

LAURA: Are you going to fight with us?

MATT: "I assumed I was, unless you wish otherwise."

LAURA: No, we would love it.

TALIESIN: That would be very helpful.

LAURA: I just don't want to put you into that position, if you didn't want to.

TRAVIS: I do. I really want to put you in that position.

SAM: No, no, no, don't listen to Fjord.

TRAVIS: Quite powerful.

SAM: You have a family at home that you need to think about as well.

MATT: "I do, but right now I have a family I've made here on this island that I still feel responsible for."

SAM: You consider us a family that fast?

LAURA: (laughs)

MATT: "Sure. Um..."

TRAVIS: (laughs)

MARISHA: Do you have kids here?

MATT: "No."

MARISHA: Oh.

MATT: "But there are many good people here, at least good for the time that I've known them, and I don't want them damned to this life without choice."

LIAM: They say the V.O. community is full of some of the best people you will find.

SAM: True, it's true.

TRAVIS: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

LAURA: (laughs)

TRAVIS: I know we have two entrances and we had talked about coming in from two different sides, or do we want to hedge our bets, or not hedge our bets, and go in through one? Do we want to split up and come in from that...

TALIESIN: I don't know. I feel like if he can really see us at all times, which I guess he can, it's not like we can hide.

LAURA: We can't sneak up on him.

TALIESIN: So there's no sneaking up. So we either go in the way we know, or go in this new way, but I wouldn't... I don't know. It just seems...

MARISHA: Do any of you all have any type of magic that would help with that?

TALIESIN: I mean...

TRAVIS: You mean cloak our...?

TALIESIN: What kind of magic?

ASHLEY: Keep us hidden.

MARISHA: Force field cloaking magic? (laughter)

TALIESIN: I genuinely don't know how he's doing this, so I don't have anything.

SAM: Yeah, I mean, I can turn invisible for a short time, but I don't know if he can see our essence or hear us or feel us, or...

LAURA: He can't hear us.

SAM: He can't hear us?

LAURA: No.

LIAM: We believe he cannot hear us.

LAURA: We don't think he can.

SAM: But if it's just purely visual, I mean. Some of us can become invisible, correct?

MARISHA: It's true.

TALIESIN: Assuming that works.

MARISHA: You could try it. Can you go invisible tonight and see if you still feel that tingling sensation like you're being watched?

LAURA: Didn't you do it before? You did it already.

SAM: I think I was invisible for a time.

LAURA: And you still felt it. I think I remember.

SAM: Did I?

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: The sensation of proximity, being watched, did not diminish when you were invisible.

SAM: Well, either way, shouldn't we be near the ships for when the dragon--

LIAM: I think so.

SAM: -- Dieter comes?

LIAM: Because Dieter is either coming or not, and if he comes and wrecks things and we are lucky enough to have Vokodo leave his lair and exit, if we are not there, then we're not going to be able to take advantage of it.

TRAVIS: How would Vokodo leave? Through the tunnel, the first entrance that we went through? The ship entrance? Or is he going to...

LAURA: Who knows?

SAM: You mean leave permanently?

TRAVIS: Like, if he flees his lair...

LAURA: Oh my god. What if he climbs up and out of the volcano and he comes out the top of it? How cool would that be?

TRAVIS: I mean, he may just stay, but if he goes... I'm just trying to think it out. We're not going to set off a tremendous volcanic explosion and kill everyone on the island, are we?

ASHLEY: Ugh.

SAM: Who knows?

TRAVIS: We have no way to know.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

TRAVIS: I suppose if he flees through the first entrance we went through and we're at the ship tunnels, then he would be on the other side of the mountain, and we wouldn't really be able to help.

MARISHA: Also, does Vokodo even care about the ships?

LAURA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Hard to say. I think he does in terms of keeping people on the island, right?

TALIESIN: But why not just destroy them instead of hoarding them?

SAM: Well, speaking as a hoarder myself, I've collected things all my life, and this gentleman Vokodo seems... I mean, I have a kinship with him, because he keeps a lot of wonderful, shiny objects around him at all times, and I've had that same passion my whole life, and if these ships are part of his collection, he won't want to part with them. He won't want to see them destroyed.

LIAM: And it seems he wants things of value, and a means of escaping the island are all of these people's valuable asset. Probably the only reason he does not have them in his chamber with him is because of their size, so he has them as close as possible, perhaps.

TRAVIS: Seems like the best bet, then.

TALIESIN: So, if we stay at that end, see if we can get the dragon turtle in the cave, doing damage.

LAURA: Dragon turtle, attacking the butthole.

TALIESIN: And then we can come in once that starts going down.

MARISHA: And maybe if he doesn't come out, Vokodo isn't lured out, maybe then we can make the dragon turtle smaller and send him further up the bloodstream, maybe.

LIAM: Or grab him like a package and bring him in. That's insane, but it could work.

MARISHA: But I like it.

ASHLEY: I like it, too.

TRAVIS: This is a great plan.

MARISHA: I like it.

SAM: This is a great plan!

LIAM: So maybe we make our way there tonight, and we camp on ships towards the rear of the impound lot near the entrance to the butthole?

MARISHA: Okay.

SAM: And time permitting, maybe we could even, if there's room in that vast cavern where the ships were, maybe we could sort of hide one off to the side for ourself?

TALIESIN: (hums) I would recommend we not be seen staging the territory, so to speak.

TRAVIS: We also have to control the water long enough to get a ship, a big ship, through, and not have the spell falter because then, goodbye ship.

SAM: All right. Well, then, let's just get there.

MARISHA: Okay.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MATT: "All right, then."

SAM: To Heaven's Fall. Heaven Falls?

MATT: "Heaven Falls. I gather we'll take a tree nearby where we camped the night before?"

SAM: Sure.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MATT: "(sighs) It's been a while. "Follow me." You see she rubs her hands, and takes a step towards one of the larger trees, just as you guys have stepped into the jungle past the elements where the wilds begin to wither and you bypassed the sentient, undead large trees that you had snuck past. Once you go beyond that space, you come to the first pack of healthy, thick-rooted trees in the middle of the jungle there. Vilya approaches, rubs her hands, takes her staff and runs it in a diagonal line across the trunk, and as it does, you see this faint light green, gold sparkle. Shh, like a zipper, begin to pull down. As it does, it opens into this oval, shimmering doorway, and on the other side, you can immediately see about three or four feet of what looks like carved wood, almost like there's a tunnel. There's a walled tunnel of smooth wood where you can see the striations and rings on the interior of the tree, and on the other side, white beach and an ocean.

LAURA: (gasping)

ASHLEY: That is so cool.

MATT: "Quickly, please."

LAURA: Oh, oh, okay!

SAM: Oh, yes. Go, go, go, go, go!

TRAVIS: Thought she was full of shit.

MATT: As you all rush through, there's a brief moment, a similar rush sensation, though much shorter than the one you're familiar with with Teleportation via Caleb. And as you step out, your feet find the soft, hot sand on the white beaches on the eastern shore of Rumblecusp. And just as you all emerge and you watch Vilya escape, (whooshing) it closes behind her and just the tree trunk of one of the palms there is left like nothing had happened.

LAURA: That was awesome!

ASHLEY: That is a very cool trick.

TALIESIN: That's amazing.

LAURA: What would happen if you were halfway through the tree when it closed? Would you get cut in half?

MATT: "Let's hope we never find out."

LAURA: (exclaims)

ASHLEY: Just mummified in the tree? Petrified?

LAURA: Like, just a hand's...

MATT: "I'm sure it's happened. I've been careful before."

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MARISHA: Maybe that's how faces get trees. How trees get faces.

TRAVIS: How faces get trees! (laughter) Holy shit. (laughter)

ASHLEY: What's weird is it totally made sense to me. I was like, "Yeah, you're right."

MARISHA: Yasha was on the same page, okay?

ASHLEY: Same page.

MARISHA: Yeah.

ASHLEY: (laughs)

MATT: You can hear the distant sound of the Heaven Falls crashing not far from here. You are at the exact beach where you guys had rested the night before. So you still have an afternoon. If there's any further planning you want to do, you guys can discuss or set up for the night. The evening's yours, so...

LIAM: Did we ever take a short rest?

MATT: Not since you left the Ruin.

SAM: Let's do that.

MATT: I don't believe so.

TRAVIS: Short rest?

LIAM: Yeah, I would like to.

LAURA: I don't think we did. We might have done it... No, I think we did it right after when we were at the Ruins, we did it. When we were searching everything.

MATT: That's correct, that's correct.

ASHLEY: We did, yeah.

LIAM: Okay.

SAM: Well, what other preparations do we need? Do we need to go into the cavern and sort of get a lay of the land, figure out where we're going to be?

TRAVIS: Anything changed from the last time that we were here that we can see?

MATT: Make a perception or investigation check.

TRAVIS: Investigation, please. Ooh, 25.

MATT: 25. Glancing about the sands, you can see the tracks left behind. You can see the indentations where you guys spent the evening, though it looks like a bit of the seaside wind has blown some elements of sand to soften the impact of where bodies lied. But nothing seems to be disturbed beyond the tracks you left when you made your way.

TRAVIS: Seems safe.

LAURA: Oh, man.

TALIESIN: This could be where you set up the Welcome to Traveler Con.

LAURA: Oh, yeah!

TALIESIN: Be a nice beach.

LAURA: That'd be really nice.

TALIESIN: Show up and give everybody a badge.

LAURA: I just realized, you guys. I can't control the water to get back into the cavern.

TRAVIS: I can.

LAURA: Oh, okay. Good. (laughs)

MATT: All right. You guys heading back to the falls, then?

LIAM: I think we should, yeah. I think we should bed down in there for the night, because if he's with us at all times, it will seem like perhaps we are just finding shelter. He knows that we're doing something, but it would seem... I don't think we should monkey with any boats, as Caduceus said. Should just look like we're sheltering for the night, and then maybe thinking of coming to give him an offering or something.

SAM: If we go back in there, Caduceus, will you be able to control your urges to swim down and through?

TALIESIN: No.

SAM: All right.

TALIESIN: No, I'll be fine. (laughter)

SAM: Yasha, just in case?

MARISHA: (clears her throat)

ASHLEY: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

SAM: Just get ready.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Not to kill him.

ASHLEY: Just knock him out?

TRAVIS: Not kill, yeah.

ASHLEY: No, no, no, no, no.

SAM: Do what you have to do.

ASHLEY: Just a "Go to sleep."

TRAVIS: That'd be sufficient. "Go to sleep, go to sleep, go to sleep."

ASHLEY: We could tie a rope around each other, you know.

SAM: Oh, yeah!

ASHLEY: So we're sleeping, if one goes, we all go.

TALIESIN: That tends to go well.

SAM: Sure.

LAURA: Yeah! (laughter)

TRAVIS: When has that never not worked out? (laughter)

MATT: All right, so you guys wade your way back out into the open lagoon that leads towards the Heaven Falls. Approaching, as you get closer and closer to it, the water itself still firing up with the same intensity that it previously has.

TRAVIS: Yep, yep.

MATT: You have use of Control Water, you said?

TRAVIS: I do.

LAURA: I point out to Fjord where he should do it so that it does the least amount of damage to us as we go through it.

TRAVIS: And do you split it? Do you put it off to the left or right? You just stopped it entirely? What did you do?

LAURA: I split it, but, you know, you might be able to just put it off to the side if we go into the side of the cavern. That might be easier, I'm not sure.

TRAVIS: Whatever you think will work. I only can do it one time.

LAURA: Just try it from the side.

TRAVIS: Okay, I'll--

LAURA: Maybe that's better.

TRAVIS: Side, yeah. So I'll walk up and--

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: Literally try and shift so that one side becomes open.

MATT: All right. You guys watch as Fjord wades out a little further, putting his hand forward and concentrating. The large, solid beam of water begins to-- (rushing water) And shift to one side. As it does, you can now see the wetted cliff-side atop that is left to glisten under the sun, and the water is now firing off and spraying somewhere in the jungle down the southern side of where it once was, and you can see now the cliff-face behind it is now exposed and seemingly safe to traverse.

TALIESIN: Somewhere there's a very soggy tyrannosaurus.

TRAVIS: Not a problem.

TALIESIN: Yep, going.

TRAVIS: Yep.

MATT: All right. One by one, you all make your way into the familiar interior of the tunnel without issue. You all take a wide berth to not be pulled into the rapid current that is immediately around where it's breaking the water's surface.

MARISHA: It's tempting, though!

MATT: It is tempting. Then you come into the darkened chamber, the familiar sounds of water droplets all around you, and you can see, in the space, the shape of all the various ships as you left them. But the cavern is yours.

MARISHA: What time is it? Still afternoon?

MATT: Still afternoon. You guys have time, but you don't have to spend the afternoon if you want to jump ahead. You can just say the things you want to do and then continue from there.

LAURA: I thought it was later in the day. I thought it was getting evening by the time it was ending the last time.

MATT: It was later afternoon, evening.

LAURA: Was it?

SAM: Do we want to--

MARISHA: 4:00pm.

SAM: Do we want to set up a hidey spot on anywhere in here, or...?

LAURA: Yeah, find a good--

TALIESIN: We should take a walk about and look around a little bit more, and maybe figure out if there's a place that...

SAM: It's all water, right? Is there a walkway around the perimeter, or...?

MARISHA: There's an embankment.

TRAVIS: A catwalk. No manmade stuff.

MATT: The ships are placed on the sides, and you can see there's the walls of the cavern. There's a slight element of... silt and some sand that gives a slight embankment but it's all gradual, so it's not like a platform or any sort of a sand bank that you can stand on comfortably. You can get up against the wall and it'll keep you there, but it's a decline and it slips the further out you go immediately.

ASHLEY: We could just hang out on Eden's Horizon.

SAM: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Yeah, that wasn't too close, where we were feeling the pull, right? Still safe?

MATT: Yeah, it's far enough away.

LAURA: It's not right when you come in, though, because if Dieter does come in--

LIAM: Comes busting through.

LAURA: I don't want to be on the ship he sees first, you know what I mean?

MATT: No, it's not immediately right there. It's a little ways in.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: It's, like, halfway through the cavern itself.

TALIESIN: There is also the question is, if we go into the cavern, how are we going to find our way?

LAURA: One of us will have to be taken.

TRAVIS: Yeah, I think we've just got to let it happen.

LAURA: Then we just follow whoever fails.

SAM: Oh, wow. That's disturbing.

ASHLEY: But it disappears when you get close to him.

LAURA: Yeah.

ASHLEY: So...

LAURA: Yeah, it just takes you to the chamber, that's all.

TALIESIN: We'll also need to breathe underwater.

TRAVIS: I just re-upped everyone.

TALIESIN: Oh, well.

TRAVIS: Yeah. But the rope's not a bad idea, because some of us can swim a lot faster than the others. They would get lost.

SAM: Does anyone have a bunch of rope?

MARISHA: Yeah, a few of us do.

TRAVIS: I have 50 feet of rope.

MARISHA: I have 50 feet as well.

SAM: Cool.

TALIESIN: I do not have rope.

ASHLEY: I have rope.

TALIESIN: Honestly, I'm actually missing a lot of things.

LAURA: (laughs)

TALIESIN: Man.

SAM: So shall we just feast and sleep, or is there more planning that we need to do?

TRAVIS: (exhales) Sure feels like there's more we need to do, doesn't it?

LIAM: Well...

TRAVIS: Really.

LIAM: Everything changes if Dieter does not come.

MARISHA: Mm-hmm.

LIAM: Hopefully he does. If he does not come, we are going to enter for more offerings, and just throw down, I would imagine. We also have to survive our sleep.

TALIESIN: Yes.

LIAM: And see if we all remember who we are, and deal with that if it is a problem.

LAURA: Yeah. We should get some more gold dust ready just in case somebody does need help in the morning.

TRAVIS: We should probably take shifts while we sleep. If he's been watching us and we've been traveling all over the island and he's clocking us as a threat, we are pretty close to where he is, just on the off-chance that he's like, "Oh, I'm going to go get them while they sleep."

TALIESIN: Little thread ought to do that. Also, we're going to be sleeping in a bubble, right?

LIAM: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Or no? Okay.

LIAM: Yeah.

SAM: Except it's not a bubble, though. It's a dome, right?

LIAM: Yeah, it does not go all the way around, but...

LAURA: So, he could come up from underneath, because it is a boat.

LIAM: Yeah. He would have to go through all of our large ship to get to us, but... And then when the moment happens, either here in the shipyard, or in Vokodo's lair, we will try to send him away, no? So you all have to keep him busy.

TRAVIS: Yes. We can do that.

MARISHA: As long as I can get up to him.

LAURA: I can-- I have a spell for that.

MARISHA: Dope.

MATT: For the two clerics, how much diamond dust do you still have left?

LAURA: Is it diamond dust that we need?

MATT: Yeah.

LAURA: Or gold dust? Okay, it's diamond dust?

MATT: Diamond dust for the Greater Restoration.

LAURA: Let me look at my diamonds.

TRAVIS: Oh, yeah, that is the variable. How many of us fail tonight.

ASHLEY: Yeah. (exhales)

MATT: Vilya, checking in, says, "I only have components for one more casting myself."

LAURA: And it's how much worth?

MATT: 100.

LAURA: 100. I have a 300 gold diamond and a 500 gold diamond.

SAM: Ooh. But we have to pulverize?

LAURA: Although I've got 100 gold left from one of the diamonds because we didn't do it. This is retroactive.

SAM: Do we need to pulverize it somehow, or...?

TALIESIN: Do you have any more diamond as well, or...?

SAM: I don't, but I have a substitute.

TALIESIN: Oh, that's right.

SAM: Yes.

TALIESIN: Residuum.

SAM: Residuum.

LIAM: I can pulverize a gem in the morning.

MARISHA: I have a jeweler's kit. I can just take the night to file one down.

TRAVIS: (imitates filing)

LAURA: If I say we destroyed--

TRAVIS: "I'm fine!"

LAURA: If I say we destroyed one of the diamonds, the 300 gold diamond, you cast Greater Restoration how many times the last time? Did you cast it twice?

LIAM: (sighs)

LAURA: Vilya cast it--

MATT: Vilya cast it once.

TRAVIS: Yeah, she cast it on you. You cast it on her.

LAURA: I cast it on you.

MATT: But you also cast it on Vilya, so it's four times it's been used.

LAURA: Four times it's been used?

TALIESIN: Four times. Going through my stuff.

SAM: Do you have any diamonds?

TALIESIN: Yeah, yeah, I do. I'm just trying to figure out-- I don't have any powdered diamonds. I would've...

LAURA: But we can say that Caleb would've powdered them.

MATT: How much residuum do you have?

SAM: I have 700 gold pieces' worth.

TALIESIN: (whistling)

MATT: So that's seven casts, as long as somebody--

SAM: It totally replaces?

MATT: Residuum can be used to replace any sort of material component cost of equal cost, but only if they have it on their person to use it.

SAM: Well, I will give you all the residuum, then. I'll give 400 to you, Jester, and 300 to you, Caduceus.

TALIESIN: How much?

SAM: 300.

TALIESIN: Wow, okay.

SAM: I don't need it. Just giving away all my shit.

MATT: (laughs)

MARISHA: Maybe you're not such a hoarder after all. Growth.

MATT: (laughs)

SAM: I really want it back, though.

MARISHA: Oh. I don't think that's how it works.

TALIESIN: Just checking how much it takes to... Pop someone back to life if something bad happens.

LAURA: It's 300. It's a 300 gold diamond.

TALIESIN: I've got a 350 diamond.

LAURA: I've got a 300 diamond and a 500 gold diamond.

TALIESIN: The 500's the Hail Mary if something goes really, really wrong. 300's a quick fix. 500's a long-term problem.

LAURA: Well, one of them... Oh, god. So I'm going to say we used residuum for the last ones. This is so hard to do retroactive. So I've got 300 gold worth of residuum.

SAM: Do you have the plans for the American war base as well? (laughter)

TRAVIS: Coca-Cola.

LIAM: Here's what we're going to do.

LAURA: And you have--

TRAVIS: John Wayne.

LAURA: -- 200 gold worth of residuum?

TALIESIN: I cast twice, so I would have 100.

LAURA: Got it, okay.

MATT: All right. Well, there you go.

TALIESIN: And 50 diamond if someone grinds them down.

SAM: 50 on a gift certificate.

MATT: So, with that said, you guys can rest for the evening early if you'd like to, and wake up early after a eight-hour rest, if that's the case, if you're looking for maximized time for Water Breathing and anything else you want to do before bed. Your call.

MARISHA: Fancy Feast.

LAURA: Yeah. Set it up on the, uh... On the deck of this here ship?

MATT: All right. You guys have situated now up on top of the Eden's Horizon, after getting your materials ready for any possible encounters in the day to come. Jester, describe how you set your Heroes' Feast out.

LAURA: Oh man, oh man! Do we have tables here on this deck, or is it just--? I'm going to make it just a really pretty setup with blankets. I'm going to use some of my blue fabric to set up picnic blankets all over the deck, you know?

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: And it's going to be like a feast of pancakes and... Lots of pancakes. Some candy, some scones. A little bit of, what, like, potatoes for Caduceus. Do you want some mushrooms or something?

TALIESIN: I can eat pancakes. Pancakes are fine.

LAURA: Great, pancakes. So more pancakes!

MARISHA: It's a continental breakfast buffet.

LAURA: And then-- yeah. I figure some pocket bacon for Beau.

TRAVIS: All the carbs.

TALIESIN: Very carby.

LAURA: Some weird-looking bug sort of things for Yasha, just because they're interesting-looking, but really they taste like chocolate.

ASHLEY: Oh, yes.

LAURA: Spicy chocolate.

ASHLEY: Oh, very good.

TALIESIN: That's fine.

ASHLEY: It has a little bit of a kick.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

LAURA: And... It's really colorful. You know, unicorn whipped cream sort of stuff.

TALIESIN: Hook Lost Boys.

LAURA: Yeah! Very similar to, yeah, Hook. But not quite so primary colors. They're more pastel sort of shades.

TRAVIS: You're doing it, Peter!

LAURA: Cakes, cookies... Do you guys want anything more substantial, or is this good?

SAM: No, this is good.

LAURA: Give everyone stomach aches before we go in?

TRAVIS: Yep. Give everybody the reenies.

MATT: Yep. Possibly type 2 diabetes.

LIAM: One bowl of greens, perhaps. Just one.

LAURA: Caleb.

SAM: Like a cucumber salad. He likes dill, and--

LIAM: Have to be regular.

LAURA: God, okay, okay.

TRAVIS: Fiber.

LAURA: There's one teeny, tiny bowl of cucumber salad.

TALIESIN: It's got Jell-O in it. That's weird. (laughter)

LAURA: It's got green sprinkles on the top for sure. (laughter)

MATT: All right.

LIAM: Just green icing.

LAURA: Oh, and some nuts, because that's what Sprinkle likes to eat.

MATT: There you go.

LIAM: I thought Sprinkle liked to eat shit.

TRAVIS: How is Sprinkle?

LAURA: Sprinkle's doing great.

TALIESIN: Hasn't moved in three days.

MATT: You see from underneath the shawl that Jester wears, this small, skittering weasel head slowly peers out-- (squeaks and hisses) And just withdraws back in.

LAURA: He's so good!

LIAM: Is he a revenant yet?

TRAVIS: "I hope we lose!"

MATT: You don't know.

MARISHA: He's got to be.

SAM: When we were at the ruins, I think I saw Sprinkle trying to get into one of the coffins. (laughter)

LAURA: No, he wasn't. He was not, Veth.

TRAVIS: "Let Vokodo come!"

LAURA: He's so comfy! Look how comfy my cloak is. It's so comfy.

TRAVIS: "Offer me up." (laughter)

MATT: So, Jester, as you finish your invocation, you set, amongst this blue sheet that you've laid out here on the deck--

LAURA: It's green.

MATT: It's gr--? Oh, because it's one of the cloaks. Oh, there you go, respect. I misheard. You place this gemmed chalice onto it, and as you close your eyes, having taken everyone's orders... (laughter) You begin to place your hands down on the sides of it and lift the fingers up, and as you do, you watch the chalice seems to fill. As it fills with this reddish, orange liquid, that at first is a little worrying to all of you. As it spills over, it actually forms a red tablecloth around the sides of it, so overtaking the green you put down there.

LAURA: But I still want it to be on the ground. This is a cute picnic.

MATT: Yes, it's on the ground. It's on the ground.

LAURA: Very Mad Hatter. Like, everybody gets their own teacup.

MATT: Yes.

TALIESIN: I'm into it.

MATT: As it spreads out, you watch as from within this cloth-- which almost, it looks like a velvet, but as you get close to it, it's reflecting what's above it. It's almost like a still surface of water, and suddenly the water begins to become disturbed, and you see from within shapes begin to emerge, and as they do, platters begin to arise. Poof, poof. Bowls, plates. A veritable smorgasbord of pancakes, of real cakes, of sweets, candies, a bowl of nuts, a salad... (laughter) A unique spread. And as they begin to emerge, the coloration of the red begins to shift and give way, like the color itself is what's giving life to each of these small bowls and large spreads, and as it does, it's left behind with a weird translucent green color that mingles with the sheet beneath it. It looks delicious, it smells delicious, and everything seems to have this faintly glowing hue to it that's slightly off-putting, but still, the other senses tell you this is an invitation.

SAM: Is there enough for Vilya as well?

LAURA: Oh, yeah, everybody gets some. Sprinkle gets some. Everybody gets some.

MATT: "I'm not going to lie, it's been a very long time since I've had a pancake. I'm very excited for this."

TRAVIS: Pancake!

LAURA: (laughs)

MATT: You all dig into this veritable Heroes' Feast. It is delicious, it is invigorating, and for the next 24 hours...?

LAURA: Yes.

MATT: You have advantage on wisdom saving throws, you are immune to poison and everyone gains-- is it 2d10 temporary hit points?

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Go ahead and roll that now, Jester, if you don't mind.

TRAVIS: 2d10 temporary hit points?

MATT: Yes.

SAM: She's rolling for us, or we roll--?

MATT: She rolls, and then everybody gets the same number.

LAURA: (drumming fingers) Okay.

LIAM: I might crack 80.

MARISHA: Yeah, dude.

LAURA: Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay! (disappointed) Oh. Nine extra points.

SAM: Okay.

TRAVIS: Thank you. That's half Caleb's HP. (laughter)

TALIESIN: Wisdom saving throws.

MATT: With a comfortable meal in your belly and the surge of divine energy flowing through you, protecting you, you get the after-meal sleepies.

LAURA: You also can't be frightened.

MATT: Yeah, sorry, also immune to fear. Useful.

MARISHA: So, wait, it's immune to fear, poison...

TRAVIS: Nine temporary hit points.

MARISHA: And advantage on...

LAURA: Wisdom saving throws.

MARISHA: Wisdom saves.

MATT: You've got it.

MARISHA: Clutch.

MATT: Yeah, Heroes' Feast is legit.

MARISHA: While we eat... Hang on.

MATT: Mm-hmm?

MARISHA: Hang on. Advantage Wis saves. Jester?

LAURA: Hm?

MARISHA: How are you feeling about Traveler Con? You know, if we defeat the looming volcano god that has this entire island held hostage.

LAURA: Um. (sighs)

MARISHA: You all right? I honestly thought that that was going to be, like, something that you'd start rattling off a thousand ideas about, but you didn't say anything. So now I'm super-concerned.

LAURA: I just don't, um... I don't... know... I don't know what to do about it.

SAM: Like, whether or not to have it? Or what to do when you do have it?

LAURA: Well. Obviously, we're going to have it. But... the Traveler... He doesn't want to be a god. He doesn't... He doesn't like it. So I don't, um... I don't know... how to make everybody come here and pretend like they're going to worship him... and also make him happy and also make sure that they're not taken advantage of too much, and also free everybody here. And also, at the end of it, if he doesn't want to be a god, what does that mean for me and him? Or... I don't know. (sighs) I don't know. I was hoping maybe we will fight Vokodo and then everything will just become clear.

MARISHA: You seemed sad last night after you went off and talked to him for a bit.

LIAM: You're sad now.

LAURA: I am not sad now. I'm just, you know.

MARISHA: Oh. Those are tears.

LAURA: No, I'm just, like... You know, it's just-- it's stressful.

LIAM: What if it were just you and him, like your old days?

LAURA: I don't think that's a bad thing. You know? He-- He was really wonderful then. He was my best friend. I know all of you are concerned that maybe he's taking advantage or he doesn't have our best interests. Which who knows, maybe he doesn't. But, he really... got me through a lot when I was younger, you know? And he was all I had, really, and... He was wonderful. He taught me so much. If it just was him being my friend again, I'd be okay with that. I just don't know what that means for everyone else, you know, all the people that are coming here.

TRAVIS: If he said he doesn't want to be a god, did he say why he's still having everyone come here?

MARISHA: Did he know about this place?

LAURA: He did. That was, um... kind of sad to find out about. He-- he knew that... people lost their memory here, apparently. (sniffs) Um. I think, you know... I think he's hoping to sort of offload a lot of the people when they come. Maybe-- not necessarily leave them here, but make them think that, you know, he's not so available any more. It would be really stressful, you know, to have all these people constantly praying to you.

TRAVIS: But he sent you here.

LAURA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: What if you forgot him?

LAURA: He promised me that he would save me. And us. He said all of us. I believe him.

ASHLEY: How do you feel about him right now, knowing this, that he... I am very not trying to overstep at all, but him knowing that he would bring people here, that it's possible that they would forget?

LAURA: (sighs shakily) (soft, ethereal music)

LAURA: He's not, like, the best guy. (laughs) You know, he's really cool. But I don't think he always, you know... Thinks about other people, about how they'll actually be affected, sometimes. And that's just, you know, just because he's, you know, super super powerful, and um... to us... and to him, we're like ants sometimes. We don't think about the fact when we squish an ant. It doesn't mean anything to us, but the ant is real sad.

TRAVIS: Or it's dead.

LAURA: Or dead.

TRAVIS: Jester, we all want what's best for you, of course. Have you talked to him at all about going back to just the way things were when you were little, just he and you, as friends?

LAURA: I want to. I want to, I want to. It's just every time we talk he has to disappear so fast. Before, he used to be here all the time, you know? Ugh, it's so hard to share. (laughs)

SAM: But you know where he'll be. He'll be at Traveler Con.

LAURA: (sniffs) I know. He is going to be here.

SAM: And the thing that you guys have all taught me is that friends call each other on their shit, and if they're really friends, then they'll be friends afterwards. And if you know where he'll be, and you know he's not going to disappear, you should call him on his shit. Traveler Con shouldn't be about bamboozling people or you trying to put on a show. Traveler Con should be about you and the Traveler. That's how it all started.

LAURA: But all those people are already on their way here.

SAM: We'll deal with them after.

TRAVIS: You've done so much for him, and I know he's done so much for you, but trying to make him happy in this, it puts you at risk. It has put you at risk, and us. That doesn't seem, like you said, the most considerate thing.

LIAM: Yeah, but also, it is complicated sometimes, extracting yourself from the very things that made you who you are.

LAURA: (sniffs) So this might be difficult.

MARISHA: We're protective of you, and defensive of you.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MARISHA: We're here because of Jester, not because of the Traveler Con. (soft, pensive music) Honestly... all you have to do is say the word, and we'll do whatever you want. It's always been the case. But... Also, if he hurts you, I'll kill him. You know? Like... we've killed demigods before. We're about to kill one. We could kill him, too.

LAURA: We don't-- I don't want to kill him.

MARISHA: Yeah, but, you know, we could. And we would if you said the word.

LAURA: Thank you, Beau. I don't want to kill him.

MARISHA: Just don't want to see you being used, either.

LAURA: Yeah. I don't want to be used.

MARISHA: You know, you're kind of... to echo Nott's point, you are like his peer now.

LAURA: (laughing) No, I'm not. He can do so many things. He can bamf in and out whenever he wants to!

SAM: So can you.

LAURA: I can't. I'm stuck here on this island.

SAM: You can turn into things and fly, and you can... You've got a lot of powers. Look, you made us this amazing dinner out of nothing.

LAURA: This is a really good dinner.

SAM: Yeah!

TRAVIS: Quite good.

ASHLEY: It's a very good dinner. I've never had pancakes before, and this might be my favorite thing I've ever had.

TRAVIS: You really haven't touched your bugs much.

ASHLEY: Because I'm eating all the pancakes.

TRAVIS: They're crawling, though, away.

SAM: You could roll them up.

TALIESIN: I was about to say, if you roll them up, and...

ASHLEY: Best bug I've ever had. (laughter)

MARISHA: I guess we're a little bit biased because we've seen you do a lot more amazing things than we've seen the Traveler do.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

LAURA: Everything I do, all of it, is because of him.

MARISHA: Ah, give yourself some credit, too, though.

TRAVIS: And you care about people you know, about people you don't know. You cause chaos, but in the end, you don't want to hurt people. You care. In many ways, you're much more than he will probably ever be.

MARISHA: It's super natural for students to outgrow their teachers. I mean, look at me with Dairon.

TRAVIS: (stammering)

MARISHA: You know?

LAURA: Yeah.

MARISHA: Who's the teacher now?

LAURA: (laughs) Yeah. You're way cooler.

MARISHA: I-I-I know. And you're way cooler than the Traveler, in my opinion.

SAM: Did we leave Dairon at our house, by the way?

TRAVIS: (laughs)

SAM: Is she there for forever? No.

MARISHA: No, they're back in--

SAM: Oh, okay.

MARISHA: -- in Zadash now, I think. Or are they still in Rexx--? I don't know.

SAM: Cool, cool, cool.

MARISHA: She's around.

ASHLEY: Jester, I hope you know how special you are. Just you, even without the Traveler. We all think you're pretty amazing.

LIAM: And so does he, to a certain extent, so perhaps... a little more time with you will color his perspective instead of he coloring yours.

LAURA: Thank you, guys.

TRAVIS: Yeah. If you ever want it, there is life beyond the Traveler. We're here.

LAURA: Wow. That's pretty great. Thanks! (laughs) Not going to lie, I feel pretty good right now. (laughter)

TRAVIS: It's the pancakes.

TALIESIN: I just want to say, you all just did so well. I'm so proud. (laughter)

MARISHA: Oh, thanks, yeah.

TALIESIN: Everybody was just--

SAM: We pulled a Caduceus!

MARISHA: Yeah, we did!

TALIESIN: You guys... I just got to sit here and nod. It was amazing.

SAM: Wow!

TALIESIN: Wisdom, wisdom, self-realization. A little more wisdom, some more self-realization. (laughter) It was great.

MATT: Vilya, mouth still half-full with a pancake, goes, "I know I've only just met you, but this is a tight family. Hold onto each other. This is important."

LIAM: I gently push my salad across towards Vilya.

MATT: She eats more of her pancakes. (laughter) "I've had plenty of salad in recent years."

LAURA: Have you ever had salad with sprinkles, though?

MATT: "There's sprinkles in that? That's strange. (laughter) That's unique."

TALIESIN: Basically sugared croutons when you get down to it.

LAURA: Ugh.

MARISHA: Disneyland resort salad.

TALIESIN: (laughs)

TRAVIS: Frosted Flakes in your salad.

MARISHA: Why are they shaped like Mickey ears, these cucumbers? (laughter)

TRAVIS: Frosted Mini Wheats.

TALIESIN: How do you get an avocado to do that, even.

MARISHA: (laughs)

MATT: Well, the evening is yours to set up as you see fit, whether it be more things to get ready, more conversations to have or setting up the dome and whatever your preparation would be before a night's rest.

LIAM: Yeah, I think I would set up the dome, not on the deck, but...

MATT: Below deck?

LIAM: Below deck. And I will set up, uh... I won't set up the wire. There's no point to it. But what I will do is, eventually, whether this is in sequence now or later, I'm going to take time to pull out the wand that Calianna gifted to me and set it down inside the dome and take out... I have a handful of little bits of stained glass from our battle with the Laughing Hand. I'm just going to lay the wand down on the ground and spend, I don't know, maybe 30 minutes to an hour just sort of sliding different pieces of glass around, switching them out, and just pondering a thing.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: That's it.

MATT: Anybody else need to do anything?

LAURA: Um.

TALIESIN: I'm just going to sit. Meditate. Listen to the sound of the waterfall.

MATT: All right.

LAURA: Yes, I am going to do something.

MATT: What you doing, Jester?

LAURA: I'm going to go up to the front of the cavern where the waterfall is.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: Is there an object like a rock or anything nearby the front of that cavern? Anything that I can... like, is there a boat that's close by?

MATT: There is a ship maybe about, begins at 20 or so feet from the entranceway on the left side. If you're looking for a small rock, like a handheld rock?

LAURA: Uh-huh. That would have a place to position right near the cavern.

MATT: Okay, okay. Make an investigation check as you're rummaging through the nearby sand and dirt that has accumulated at the corner to see if there's any loose stone or rock that you can grab.

LAURA: 11.

MATT: 11? Eh, it takes you a little bit, but you manage to find a piece of flaked-off obsidian from the inside of the rock cavern, or the volcanic rock, goes into an obsidian color. But you pull it out. It's sharp on one edge, about that big, but you find one.

LAURA: Do I still have Tongues up?

MATT: Tongues lasts an hour, I believe?

LAURA: It was only an hour?

LIAM: (murmuring) (tutting) That is correct, one hour.

MATT: So, no, that would be gone.

LAURA: Okay. Well, hopefully he'll recognize my voice. I'm going to cast, with my Rod of the Solitary Scout, the wand that I have, I'm going to cast Magic Mouth.

SAM: Ooh!

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: On the rock.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: And I'm going to say... Here they are, ready for the taking!

TRAVIS: (laughs)

LAURA: And then I put it right at the edge, so that way, if the dragon turtle comes within range, he'll hear it and be tempted to come on in.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

MATT: Okay. All right. As you seal that vocal print into the stone, it vibrates in your hand and you place it just in the proximity of where the illusion begins and the actual opening for the cavern itself is held. You feel pretty confident that a being of that size, if it were to come through, would definitely trigger the radius for the spell.

LAURA: Cool, cool, cool, cool.

MATT: All right? Anybody else?

LIAM: A minor thing, I will also stay up at least an hour to use components necessary to turn Frumpkin into an octopus, and I will just frisbee him out off of the ship to patrol while we are sleeping, and to be more use, possibly, tomorrow.

MATT: You got it.

TRAVIS: (imitating octopus) Perfect. All right. Anybody else, or are we looking to a night's rest?

TRAVIS: Oh my god, I think we're doing it.

SAM: Rest.

LAURA: (groaning)

MATT: Okay. You all gather into the dome. Are you doing your jade thing again, or leaving it as it was?

LIAM: I cannot. I'm tapped.

ASHLEY: Are we tying each other together or is that a bad idea?

TALIESIN: We can, uh...

LAURA: Let's do it.

ASHLEY: Yeah?

TALIESIN: Just in case?

MATT: So the jade thing, the plethora of images that you left the night before, did help lower the DC of the check last time.

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: But if you cannot do it, then we'll just go with whatever its standard is. No worries.

LIAM: I am tapped at that level.

MATT: That's okay. All right, then. All of you gather for the evening's rest. You're tying yourselves together with rope?

TRAVIS: I think we should, right?

TALIESIN: Sure.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Who's affixed to who? Or is it everyone affixed to a singular piece of rope?

TALIESIN: No, we could--

LAURA: Yeah, just do this order.

TRAVIS: We do the twice around your wrist, extend it six feet or more.

LAURA: (laughs)

ASHLEY: We can take it off easily, but it'll wake us up.

MATT: So it'll take, between all of you, two sets of rope, I think.

MARISHA: Okay.

MATT: So you guys got that?

MARISHA: Mm-hmm.

ASHLEY: Yes, I have some.

MATT: Cool. Placed, roped and resting, you all eventually find yourselves to a night's sleep. The dreams range from nothing, but just an evening of dark comfort, to images of past experiences, fuzzy. Yasha. In the darkness, you still sense yourself sleeping, and consciously, you're like, "I'm having a hard time sleeping." The insomnia's kicked in, whether it be the nerves for the day before. (sighs) Should probably get up. And as you open your eyes, it's just darkness before you. Glancing ahead, trying to find something, you catch one little speck of light. (blowing softly) A single white feather that seems to be drifting down. You're not laying on your side. You're sitting up, or at least it's drifting from an angle, but it's coming straight down from your perspective, before it comes to rest on the ground. As it hits, (popping) you see these ripples, like it hit the surface of a still, glass-like ocean. As the ripples go out... (thunder rumbling) You see flashes of lightning in the distance, contained within clouds, a storm that sits on the horizon, every horizon as you look around. It's just you and the feather. (thunder rumbling) The storm rolls and roars louder... and louder. What do you do?

ASHLEY: Am I in the water?

MATT: You glance down and you're standing on a similar surface, though it feels hard. Doesn't seem to react to your footfalls. The ripples only came out from where the feather hit.

ASHLEY: Can I go towards the feather?

MATT: Sure. You step. As you step from the place you were at-- (footstep) your first footstep hits the water in front, another ripple comes out. The storms-- (thunder rumbling) rage even louder with that footstep. You take another. Another ripple through the water. (thunder rumbling) The storm's getting closer and closer. The feather's about four feet from you, about as many footsteps.

ASHLEY: I will keep walking towards it, and... I'll just-- I'll look around... and reach down to pick it up.

MATT: Okay. With each rushing footstep, the storm gets louder and louder. As you reach towards it, there's a flash and an impact. (lightning striking) You see this burst of energy beneath the surface of the water in front of you. Splashing water and mist spray your face, and instinctually, you pull away, the feather disturbed on the surface and then coming to rest again. You hear the thunder rolling loud around you still, and there's that strength for a moment fades, and that fear, that fear that sent you fleeing from your people, that fear that drove you westward, that same sense of being alone, inconsequential, shackled with guilt, keeps you from reaching for that feather, yet it still lies before you as the storm gets louder and louder. What do you do?

ASHLEY: I'm going to try to grab it again.

MATT: Okay. Make a wisdom saving throw for me if you don't mind.

SAM: With advantage?

ASHLEY: With advantage.

MATT: With advantage, because technically, yeah, you do have it.

MARISHA: Heroes' dreams.

ASHLEY: (exhales) That was a one.

TRAVIS: Saving throw, saving throw.

ASHLEY: 16.

MATT: 16. (sighs) As you're going, and initially about to turn, that fear filling your soul, you spin around to look back towards the darkness, where you can see the storm is breaking behind you. It is more dangerous in front of you, and behind you there is promised respite and escape. In that moment, the thunder seems to form words. This rolling voice seems to come out of the storm itself that says, "Do not run from yourself. Overcome what faltered," (thunder rumbling) “and rise stronger." (thunder rumbling) You turn back around, swallow hard, and reach out and grab that feather, and as you do, there's a brief moment as you grasp it that the air seems to buzz with energy. that the air seems to buzz with energy. That single moment where you sense the anticipation before something happens, and you look up just as a streaking blast of pure lightning energy-- just as a streaking blast of pure lightning energy-- (lightning crackling) streaks down towards you. What do you do?

ASHLEY: Hoh, um... I... I will look up at it and I will just say: I do not want this fear anymore. And I will stand there and wait for it to hit me.

MATT: Okay. As you look up in that brief moment, without hesitation, you embrace the coming bolt, and as it hits you, you just see white. Your whole body vibrates with power, and for a moment you feel like every piece of your body is about to break apart and shatter. But it just stays at that threshold, and you embrace it. As the light begins to fade, you can now see that dark abyss beneath you is alight with this faint blue glow, and beneath this glass-like surface, 10, 20, it's hard to say, 100 feet down, it is just an endless underwater hillside scape of broken chain link, tethered and tangled endlessly beneath you. As you look within your hand, you see you hold that single white feather, and you look back up into the clouds, which now have swollen to encompass the entire sky and horizon around you. There is a single hole in the sky above. The voice once more crackling through the storm says, "Show me--" (thunder rumbling) "You can be reborn." (thunder rumbling)

ASHLEY: Okay. (laughter) Um... (exhales) I bamf out the wings.

TRAVIS: Yeah, yeah, yeah!

LIAM: Flex!

LAURA: (clapping)

TRAVIS: Yeah, yeah, yeah!

MATT: Your wings emerge, the withered, skeletal, bone-like black necrotic wings, the representation of your fallen self. The faint beginnings of those feathers you noticed still there, clinging to life at the edge of these almost... vestigial extensions of yourself, of your guilt, of the emotional turmoil that you hold and hoist upon your shoulders. And as you look up to the sky, you watch like flowers blossoming on the extended branches of a tree in the beginning of spring, more feathers begin to emerge and fill, and emerge and fill. And the darkness around you begins to glow, lit like a lantern that billows and brightens as the wings become full, angelic. The light itself is white and blue, and you can see, between the feathers, little sparks (electricity sparking) of energy. As you look up towards that hole once more.

ASHLEY: Um--

MATT: You hear a voice. Female, familiar, distant, from below. You look down, and in the chains, you see a female form beckoning. The words, you can't quite make out, but it's calling to you.

ASHLEY: (exhales) Oh, god. Okay, okay, okay. Um...

MATT: It sounds very much like Zuala.

ASHLEY: (exhales) Um... I crouch down, and I put my hand out.

MATT: It breaks the surface. And you sense you could... go.

ASHLEY: (exhales) (sighs) (whispered) I have to go. And I'll leap. Leap up.

TRAVIS: (inhaling sharply)

MATT: As you withdraw your hand and alter your stance into a crouch as the wings unfurl, preparing to take their first beat, the voice says, "I'm proud of you. Don't let me be a shackle." (beating wings) And with renewed strength you've not felt from an extension beyond your own arms, you fight your way up into the storm, this tunnel around you of lightning flashing. (furious lightning) All around you. Forcing your way up as high as you can until eventually you break past the clouds. (rushing air) Up into a night sky of stars, and two moons. As you look back down, the hole closes. The clouds become mist, and as the mist fades, you're looking down upon... land masses, water, Exandria. And it's a freedom you've not quite felt before, like you could go anywhere. As morning comes to you all. (exhaling) (laughter) You all wake up well-rested. A little churny in the stomach based on the maybe not (laughs) balanced meal many of you enjoyed the night before. Except for Caleb.

LIAM: I'm fine.

MATT: Caleb's fine.

LAURA: (laughs) But you wake up. Well, you would know what time it is.

LIAM: Would I?

MATT: You have no sense of-- There is no sun around you. You guys slept relatively early, so you're waking up now at about dawn. So it's about 5:30 or so in the morning. But it's still dark on the inside, but consciousness takes you. You wake up, the day is yours.

TRAVIS: The day is ours? Oh.

SAM: Everybody know who they are?

MARISHA: Yeah.

LAURA: Oh.

MATT: Yeah. So I'd like everyone to make Wisdom saving throws, please.

TRAVIS: Oh. (laughter)

ASHLEY: I'll forget what happened last night.

MATT: ♪ False sense of security. ♪

TALIESIN: With advantage.

LAURA: With advantage.

SAM: With advantage?

MATT: With advantage, because of Heroes' Feast.

MARISHA: I'm okay.

TRAVIS: That's off.

TALIESIN: Eesh.

TRAVIS: 16.

MATT: 16.

LAURA: 22.

MATT: 22.

LIAM: 15.

MATT: 15.

SAM: 23.

MATT: 23.

ASHLEY: 16.

MATT: 16.

TALIESIN: 21.

MATT: 21.

MARISHA: 16.

MATT: 16. (groaning)

LAURA: Right on this cusp, I think.

TRAVIS: He's got to roll, though.

MATT: For Vilya.

SAM: For Vilya.

MATT: So... (paper rustling) Caleb.

LIAM: Yeah?

SAM: Oh.

MATT: You're the only person that missed by one.

MARISHA: Oh, shit.

MATT: When you come to consciousness, everyone looks around and you look around, taking stock of the friends around you. It's Fjord, Jester, Veth, Caduceus, Beauregard, Yasha, Vilya. Good. You remember all that. Why are we here? There was something you're supposed to be doing here. There's ships around you, and you came to an island. But why? Why were you here? And you immediately recognize consciously, like, "Oh no." Oh no. With your intelligence and self-awareness, you know exactly what happened.

LIAM: So, self-aware of the fact that--

MATT: Because of your high intelligence and the preparation you guys have done, you forgetting things, they're fuzzy, and you being you, can acknowledge that something's wrong.

LAURA: (chuckling)

MATT: You don't quite understand what, but just something's not right.

LIAM: I don't... I'm... You know, I'm a little bit off. In a good mood, though.

SAM: You're in a good mood?

MARISHA: Oh, yeah, then something's definitely off.

LAURA: Oh, yeah, we better definitely--

TRAVIS: Tackle him! No, I'm just kidding. (laughter)

TALIESIN: Which of us wants to take it?

LAURA: Boulder, Parchment, Shears?

TALIESIN: Boulder, Paper, Shears?

TRAVIS: Three-way.

MATT: "Certainly. I haven't played this since I was a little girl. Okay, okay."

LAURA: All right.

MATT: "All right. On three, or three then?"

LIAM: What are we doing?

LAURA: On three.

TALIESIN: On three.

LAURA: Okay.

LIAM: Eins, zwei, drei. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Wow!

ASHLEY: Oh my god!

TRAVIS: Go again.

SAM: Three-way.

LAURA: (groaning)

TRAVIS: You're out.

LAURA: Oh, wait, that means I lost, so I should use my spell slot.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: "Yes."

LAURA: Hi, Caleb.

LIAM: What are we doing?

LAURA: How are you doing today?

LIAM: Doing so--

LAURA: I cast Greater Restoration.

MATT: Suddenly, all the memories rush back to you. You feel that strange alteration is ejected, like some foreign substance in your lungs, but from your mind instead, like mentally coughing it from the inside of your brain, and then suddenly, oh, you're fine. You're fine, you're fine.

LIAM: I had a very tall, erect spine, and it just went a little... (groans)

LAURA: Oh, he's back, you guys. (laughter)

ASHLEY: Oh no!

TRAVIS: Oh, everything sucks. (laughter)

SAM: You were smiling for a second!

LAURA: You were happy.

SAM: Aww.

LIAM: It happens sometimes.

SAM: It looked really weird.

TALIESIN: We knew you wouldn't like it.

LIAM: Thank you.

LAURA: You're welcome.

LIAM: Ja. Better this way.

TRAVIS: Yes. (laughter)

SAM: Was that a question?

TALIESIN: For now.

TRAVIS: Period. Right?

LIAM: Yeah?

LAURA: You're much taller than I realized.

LIAM: Yeah, I'm, you know, average human height.

MATT: I would also like everybody to make an investigation check, please.

LAURA: Oh, man.

MARISHA: Oh, shit.

TRAVIS: 18.

MATT: 18, all right. Jester?

LAURA: 10.

MATT: 10.

LIAM: 22.

SAM: 30.

ASHLEY: 22.

TRAVIS: 30!

TALIESIN: Two.

ASHLEY: 30?

MARISHA: 22.

MATT: You said two, Caduceus?

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: All right, if I could have Caduceus and Jester. Pick something of your inventory that just is gone. You forgot it. You don't know where you put it, it's weird.

TALIESIN: Oh...

LAURA: I don't even know what this stuff is for. I have all these things listed.

SAM: Yeah, I have a bunch of things in my inventory that I'm like, "Wait, what?" (laughter)

LAURA: I don't think I would ever realize it was missing.

TRAVIS: At some point I was like, "You definitely need that."

LAURA: A belt with a key on it. I don't know!

MATT: Sure, it's gone.

MARISHA: Belt with a key?

LAURA: Yep.

TRAVIS: It's a belt with a key attached to it?

LAURA: Yep.

LIAM: Every day, it's got to be like, "(sighs) Another ball bearing."

MARISHA: (laughs)

MATT: You're going to get back to the Xhorhaus and be like, (huffing)

ASHLEY: How do we get in there? (laughter)

TRAVIS: It's got a hell of a lost and found section.

MATT: Oh, yeah, very much so. Rosohna's pretty on top of it there.

LAURA: I'm down to 200G-worth of residuum.

MATT: But the morning is yours for prep, if you wanted to try and speak to your friend, Dieter.

MARISHA: And there's no sign of Dieter?

TALIESIN: Let's talk about this because they asked us a question. We should be able to answer it with something reasonable.

LAURA: Yeah, why? He said, "Why should I believe you?" Or something.

MATT: That's the idea behind it.

SAM: Yeah, because we're enemies, right? Why should he trust us? This could be a trap for him.

LAURA: That's true.

MARISHA: It definitely is a trap for him.

SAM: I think you should be honest. Caduceus always recommends honesty. Just say, "We have a beef, but you'd be pissing off one of my enemies."

LAURA: That's true.

TRAVIS: Maybe we want to make amends for our previous transgressions.

SAM: Yeah, we did turn him into a little thing.

LIAM: Maybe you could say we want to sail out of here unscathed.

LAURA: I've got 25 words, you guys, and you know I already have issues. (laughter)

MARISHA: I kind of like the beef angle.

LAURA: We know you like beef... (laughter)

MARISHA: Yeah.

LAURA: We got you beef...

SAM: Beau loves the beef angle.

LIAM: That's such a loaded statement. (laughter)

MARISHA: Yeah, like, "Look, yeah, we hate you. But congratulations, we hate someone else more than you."

LAURA: Okay, okay, okay, okay. Sending.

TRAVIS: Send it!

LAURA: Look.

TRAVIS: Good usage. (laughter) Every word.

LIAM: Total filler word.

MARISHA: Great start.

SAM: (like Jester) Here's the deal.

LIAM: (like Jester) Basically... (laughter)

ASHLEY: (like Jester) Hello!

LIAM: (like Jester) Okay, okay, okay, okay... (laughter)

LAURA: We didn't get off on the right foot. But... This other guy, way worse than you. We like him less. That was four words, we like him less.

TRAVIS: We like him... We like him less.

LAURA: Him less. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Didn't say I was very good at this.

MARISHA: (laughs)

LIAM: Bring it home.

LAURA: So you should fuck him.

TRAVIS: Fuck him?

MARISHA: Fuck him?

LAURA: Fuck him! Like, fuck him! Like, fuck him over! You know, fuck him.

MARISHA: Wow, that Tongues spell really got to you. (laughter) You said fuck him in Zemnian. That's crazy!

LAURA: Well, it's, you know... Oh, I should've used the Tongues thing again.

LIAM: You could have.

LAURA: Fuck.

SAM: You've got more spells.

LAURA: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SAM: Has he replied?

LAURA: Not yet.

MATT: Okay. Roll a persuasion check.

LAURA: Uh-oh.

MATT: This has been building up to this. The conversation's been leading to an actual ask that made sense to him, somewhat. Roll a persuasion check.

SAM: I will bless you.

LAURA: Can you do that?

SAM: No.

LAURA: Can I guide myself?

MATT: Hmm.

LAURA: Not after.

MATT: It's not after, no.

LIAM: It's happening, it's not like an active--

LAURA: Oh, god.

LIAM: Come on.

LAURA: Oh! 19?

MARISHA: (exclaiming)

MATT: 19?

LAURA: N-n-n-nineteen!

MATT: The response comes after a moment, and goes, "We had discussed, I don't need a mate."

LAURA: (laughs)

TRAVIS: Oh no. Oh no.

MATT: "No, thank you."

LAURA: Aw, man. Do I have to send him another message? (groans) Another message. I don't mean sex! Fuck him over! Destroy his shit! Come get his boats! He sucks! There's lots of them. We can make amends.

SAM: Hey!

MATT: (laughs) Roll one more persuasion check.

LAURA: Oh, balls!

SAM: I will bless you again. (laughs)

LAURA: I really should've cast something on-- Shit! Okay, here we go, here we go. Here I go. (laughter)

LAURA: (sighing) Oh, motherfuck. 15?

SAM: Ooh, not terrible.

MATT: The response does not utilize the plethora of words at its disposal. It just says, "I'm good." (groaning) That first roll was so close. That first roll was so close! I'm so sorry!

MARISHA: (sighs) Shit.

SAM: Let's try three more times. (laughter)

TRAVIS: "When you say you're good... (laughter) "You mean..." SAM and

LAURA: (huffing)

ASHLEY: "Does that mean you're coming, or...?"

SAM: Our foolproof plan.

MARISHA: Fuck, it was pretty good.

MATT: It was a good plan. It was a tough sell, and it just didn't work out. I'm sorry.

LAURA: (humming)

TRAVIS: That's okay.

SAM: What's our second plan?

TRAVIS: I'm having breakfast. We're good. We're going to make our way in.

SAM: If we go in the back way, he'll know something's up immediately.

ASHLEY: Yeah, what are we going to say? Like, we were just exploring the island?

LAURA: Yeah, we're just exploring. What difference does it make? We'll bring him stuff.

SAM: I think some of us should go in the front.

TRAVIS: How do we get over there quickly?

SAM: Vilya can take us over there quickly.

LAURA: That's wasting so many spells before we even get in there. I've just wasted three fucking spells before we even got in.

SAM: If we go in the back, what are we doing? Like, "Hey, we're here to surprise you with more gifts from your back door that you told us not to use!"

LAURA: He knows we're here already.

LIAM: Already knows we're here, yeah.

LAURA: He knows that Caduceus already got sucked into the hole. We know the hole is there. We can be like, "Well, you know, we didn't want to have to go all the way around so we came this way."

MATT: "I can try and continue to play the position I've had with him since I've arrived and play it off as some sort of additional delivery. He did seem to be really into some of the things you were carrying."

TRAVIS: (with a mouth full of food) I, um-- These scones are so good.

SAM: (laughs) I kind of took my sword back, so if he sees me, I don't think he'll be too pleased.

SAM: You can disguise yourself.

LIAM: He sees you right now.

TRAVIS: Don't we think he'll see through that stuff?

LAURA: (unsure noise)

TALIESIN: Yeah.

TRAVIS: You're right, it won't work.

LAURA: Give it a try.

TRAVIS: What do you mean?

SAM: Make yourself look like Terra.

LAURA: Hey, you could also do the astral dreadnought thing.

TRAVIS: I'll make myself look like Lukash.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: Mask of Many Faces. (pulsing magic)

MATT: You take on the full orcish form of the surprisingly debonair Lukash.

TRAVIS: Full orc. Yeah.

TALIESIN: I'm not going to argue. It's a look.

TRAVIS: Thank you. I forget what he sounds like. Maybe I'll just nod.

LAURA: Well, he probably doesn't talk to Vokodo anyway, and Vokodo can't hear people, so he doesn't know what he sounds like anyway.

TALIESIN: In theory, he may have just watched you change form. So. (clears throat)

LAURA: (laughs)

LIAM: Yeah.

LAURA: Maybe. Maybe he was paying attention to something else at the time.

SAM: Maybe he just knows our position, but doesn't see our every move.

MARISHA: Yeah. We're like beacons on a map.

SAM: Yeah.

MATT: Vilya nods and is like, "He doesn't seem to be aware of the goings on in the village, or any specifics. Vokodo has previously been prone to ask what's been happening. So there might be something to that."

TALIESIN: We could be just as shocked coming through there as anybody.

LAURA: How'd we get here?! (babbling)

SAM: Oh, wow.

LAURA: Oh my gosh!

ASHLEY: Exploring, and one of us got pulled through, and we followed, and...

SAM: This isn't the bathroom. What?

MARISHA: We took eight wrong turns!

TALIESIN: Little more together for it, and here we are.

ASHLEY: Mm-hmm.

SAM: Okay, okay.

LIAM: He at least knows where we are. He knows that an offering that Fjord has made has been withdrawn. We are in a place, correct me if I'm wrong, where islanders have been forbidden to go.

MATT: This island?

LIAM: No, this area.

MATT: Oh, this area's been forbidden, yeah.

LAURA: But he already knows we're here.

LIAM: Yeah, of course. I'm just, I guess, lamenting the fact that Dieter did not come.

LAURA: Yeah, well, I'm lamenting that, too.

LIAM: We're not in a great position.

SAM: Just to throw it out there, it's not a good plan. You're going to say no, but I'm just going to throw it out there anyway.

TRAVIS: Here it comes. Let's have it.

SAM: Dieter was going to be lured here to destroy some ships and draw out Vokodo. Why do we need Dieter to destroy some ships? Couldn't we just blow up some fuckin' ships?

TRAVIS: What would we use to blow up-- Oh no.

MARISHA: I was going to suggest, maybe we keep the, like, find something else that's big and bad and likes to fight things thing and polymorph it and take it in with us. Like, we could go get one of those creepy panther things. I don't know. I'm trying to preserve the plan.

SAM: Or we could just burn all the ships with fire.

LAURA: What if we bust out the ceiling on here?

SAM: Oh. And just make it rain rocks?

LAURA: See how many ships we can take out with that.

SAM: How do we do that?

LAURA: I would think we would do it from above, because if we're down here, woof.

SAM: But, like, with what?

TRAVIS: If you blew up two of the ships with-- Do you have any of your-- I don't want to say it.

SAM: I've got some things.

TRAVIS: Right. We could see if he's going to come out of his nest. If not, question answered.

SAM: Sure.

MARISHA: We could try and find a great white in the ocean?

TRAVIS: Sorry, what?

MARISHA: A shark.

TRAVIS: You were going to go fishing for a great white shark?

MARISHA: Mm-hmm, yeah.

TRAVIS: Do you have a good charter that knows where the great white shark hunting ground...

MARISHA: You tell me, Captain Tusktooth.

TRAVIS: They're not around here.

MARISHA: Do we-- I'm trying to preserve the Dieter plan. The Derek Dieter plan.

SAM: We could be Dieter. You can be a great white shark.

TRAVIS: Oh, you were going to do like, "Here, Dieter, Dieter, Dieter!" with a great white shark or something?

MARISHA: No, like, "Here, Guaca, Guaca, Guacamole!" But with a great white shark. I don't know. I'm trying to figure it out, man! I'm sad about Dieter too.

TRAVIS: Yeah, I'm with you.

TALIESIN: We're all sad about Dieter.

MARISHA: We're all sad about Dieter.

LAURA: Sorry, you guys.

MARISHA: No, he sucks.

TRAVIS: You had the idea. That was more than we had.

ASHLEY: It was a very good idea,

MARISHA: And further proof that he should really get laid.

TALIESIN: Yeah, you tried to invite him to a party. It was his decision not to come.

SAM: Should I light a ship on fire?

TRAVIS: I think we should probably blow up at least two of them, yeah.

MARISHA: Let's destroy some ships. I like it.

LAURA: However.

LIAM: We're not at all worried that he's going to unleash the volcano's wrath in retribution?

ASHLEY: I was just going to say.

TALIESIN: I mean, yeah.

LAURA: Also, if we do that, then we can't play off the idea of Vilya going in and saying, like, "Yeah, we're here to offer you some more things." That's out the window.

SAM: All right, well then let's follow that plan. Say we go in the back door with Vilya saying, "Hey, we came in the back door to give you prizes." Then what?

TRAVIS: Yeah.

SAM: Do we give him something, or do we just attack?

TRAVIS: He seems to be pretty smart, right?

SAM: I mean, we could make a present. I could put fluffernutter in some sort of a bowl or something, and we can hand it to him, and then make it blow up.

TALIESIN: While we're in a small confined room with him.

TRAVIS: Even if his guard is slightly down, it's still a fight. We're not going to sneak up on him or surprise him or ambush him. We're still going to him.

LAURA: Right.

TRAVIS: We're trying to see if we get him to come out, right? So it's worth the shot.

LAURA: Let's try to blow some things up.

MARISHA: Try to fight him on his home turf. Underwater, by the way.

TRAVIS: Which we can breathe, but we're slow.

MARISHA: That's not cool.

LAURA: And also, we can cast-- Before we do it, I should cast Freedom of Movement, because it lasts for an hour.

MARISHA: One hour.

TALIESIN: That eats into our Banish.

TRAVIS: DM, do we remember how long it took us to traverse from the first entrance to where he was?

LAURA: But it's important.

MATT: From the first entrance, it was about maybe--

LIAM: Caleb would remember.

MATT: Probably about an hour or so of travel, but that's also because you guys were being careful and finding your way as Vilya was leading you at a casual pace.

TRAVIS: So Freedom of Movement at the last minute, right?

MARISHA: Yeah.

LAURA: Right before we go in, yeah..

MATT: Also, you do have the residuum for the Glyph of Warding thing you were also talking about last time.

LAURA: Oh, yeah, that's right. We could use the residuum for that.

SAM: To put a bomb on something, right?

LAURA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: I mean, if we really want, we can also do a group Water Walk, if anyone's got that.

LAURA: Yeah, but that's for surface.

TALIESIN: I mean, if we want to just not deal with underwater at all.

LAURA: But he's completely underwater.

LIAM: He's submerged.

TALIESIN: Mm.

LIAM: And we don't know where we're going to be facing him.

MARISHA: Okay.

TRAVIS: But good if he comes here.

TALIESIN: We have a couple Freedom of Movements, but it does cut into our Banishment.

LAURA: Yeah.

MARISHA: Yeah, it's just a matter of-- Okay, okay.

SAM: So far, our resources were: the ghosts at the Ruins, (clicks tongue) the dragon turtle, (clicks tongue) the element of surprise, (clicks tongue) any member of the village, (clicks tongue) our own ship, (clicks tongue). That's it. (laughs)

TRAVIS: Yeah. Somehow, we found ourselves back to... fluffernutter.

LIAM: So we start with fluffernutter. We hope that we can lure him in here, and if it does not work, we have to be prepared to get a message out to Vo for them to evacuate, or be on alert, in case he dumps from above, the volcano. They could build another village.

TRAVIS: They could. I also feel like they might just see it, right? If it starts to make a sound, a rumble, or earthquakes. I mean, unless they're just stupid.

MARISHA: I mean, Vilya, we're hoping you all didn't build Vo in a direct lava flow path, did you? I mean, I guess it doesn't really matter if the whole thing blows, but--

TRAVIS: You didn't build a channel down from the top.

MATT: "No. No, we did not. "But I also haven't seen the volcano erupt "to its full capabilities."

TRAVIS: (laughs) This is some shit the DM would do. Like, you piss off a god and we kill a whole village.

MARISHA: We kill the village.

TRAVIS: (laughs) We trigger Pompeii.

SAM: We'll probably get a little bit of a warning. Like, if he sees a ship blow up, he's not going to just click the nuke. He's going to come see what it is first, right?

TALIESIN: Figure out what's happening.

SAM: Yeah.

LIAM: If he can't see the specifics of what we're doing, he-- hmm. Such a tough call.

TALIESIN: It may be an accident. He may ask us what's happening.

TRAVIS: We don't know how to draw him out. We don't know how to warn them. Got to just commit, go in.

SAM: To what, going in?

TRAVIS: Well, I say we blow up the ships. If he doesn't come out, we go in.

SAM: Sure.

MARISHA: Okay.

LIAM: Yeah, because if he comes, he's going to come.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

LIAM: Fairly quickly.

TRAVIS: Hard and loud and yeah. I mean, you would think. Unless he can do shit we don't anticipate, which is very likely.

MARISHA: Shit. And yeah, by the way, the fluffernutter thing. I don't know fire damage is the right way to go with a volcano god.

SAM: I'm not going to blow him up.

LIAM: Yeah, just his property.

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just, there was a fluffernutter plan.

SAM: Oh, oh, yes, yes, yes, you're right. You're totally right, yeah.

TALIESIN: Avoid fire.

TRAVIS: Woo! I'm excited.

ASHLEY: Me too.

LAURA: (laughs)

TRAVIS: I really feel like we've covered all the bases here, and in no way could analysis after the fact reveal anything we haven't thought of. (laughter)

MARISHA: So true.

TRAVIS: Airtight!

LIAM: Jester, do you have the ability to send any more messages in case time passes and nothing?

SAM: Speaking of airtight--

LAURA: Sure.

SAM: The entire chamber fills up with smoke.

LIAM: I'm just saying in case.

LAURA: I can send more messages, sure. I've got plenty more open slots right now. It's just-- (laughs) It's just--

LIAM: I understand the problem.

TRAVIS: (laughing) I know.

TALIESIN: It's nonstop.

LIAM: I still want the ability to warn a lot of people that we've drawn the wrath of a god upon their heads.

LAURA: Yeah.

MARISHA: Vilya, is there any type of alert system in the village? Do you have anything, anyone, that you can send a message to?

MATT: "I don't have the capabilities that your friend here does, unfortunately. I'm usually one of the few that sets up a flare of some kind. I can alter the sky. We do have bells arranged throughout the village that in case something is coming to attack--"

MARISHA: Okay. You know, they've got bells.

TALIESIN: If the volcano were to start making noise, would people know to--?

MATT: "They would know Vokodo was angry if it began to erupt. They wouldn't stand in the way of the flow. They rely on me to keep him calm."

TALIESIN: We may just have to trust that people are going to act in their own interest.

LIAM: Yeah, which, the problem is we don't know what he's going to do.

TALIESIN: No.

MATT: "So what's the plan?"

SAM: We just have to trust that the V.O. community is filled with smart, smart people-- (laughter) who are not-- who have no egos. (laughter) Just think about the greater good.

LIAM: Hopefully they're all good at messaging.

TRAVIS: What level is Messaging? (laughter)

LAURA: Third.

TRAVIS: Oof.

MARISHA: They're all definitely people I'd love to have a beer with. That's for sure.

LAURA: So I could do-- the Glyph of Warding would use 200 more residuum powder.

MARISHA: I know, we're starting to run out of resources, too. That's the other thing. We've been here so long, we're going to deplete our resources.

SAM: The Glyph would only do one attack, right? It's just a few.

LAURA: Yeah. It's 5d8, if he doesn't make the save. It's a 5d8 whatever kind of damage we want it to be.

TALIESIN: And it can't move, right?

SAM: It's not terribly much.

LIAM: The original idea was to have that be that kind of gift thing, but if he's coming, busting out into this boat lot--

MARISHA: It doesn't matter, yeah.

LAURA: Nah.

MARISHA: Whatever. Should we start blowing up some boats?

SAM: (laughs) Yep, that's our planning.

TALIESIN: I cannot believe that I'm in complete agreement over this.

SAM: When it doubt, blow up a boat.

MARISHA: Let's do it.

SAM: Yeah. I will not use fluffernutter. I will use my other bomb, my depth charge.

TALIESIN: Are we going to be clever about this?

LIAM: Doesn't seem like it.

ASHLEY: What does that mean?

LAURA: Why start now?

TALIESIN: Are we going to decide where to put them or just put them willy nilly?

SAM: Well, there's a few boats that we can choose from. I don't want to do the fanciest one, right? That's Eden's Horizon.

MATT: Correct.

SAM: There's also the Banshee, the Mistral, the Fiona. Any of these look like--?

TRAVIS: Good blowing up ship?

MARISHA: We should definitely blow up the Fiona.

ASHLEY: I was going to say the Fiona too, because Fiona's just--

TALIESIN: Fiona's really got to go.

MARISHA: Yeah, it's just a dumb name.

ASHLEY: Lame. (laughter)

LAURA: It's not a terrible name, I like that name.

TRAVIS: For a ship, right?

MARISHA: Oh, right. Not Fiona Fancypants. That's not at all indicative of where I'm talking about. Let's just start blowing up boats. Why are we still talking?

SAM: Any of these good-looking vessels?

MATT: I mean, the Sea Banshee is fairly nice, and has been taken care well.

MARISHA: Why are we still talking?

MATT: The Mistral also is a nice medium-sized, looks like a naval vessel.

SAM: And which is the furthest from the Vokodo door?

MATT: The furthest from it would be the Fiona.

LAURA: Oh.

TRAVIS: Perfect.

SAM: Fiona's got to go.

TALIESIN: Have some Guidance.

SAM: Oh, thank you.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

SAM: All right. I'd like to walk on water over to the Fiona and attach my depth charge to it, or just put it on the-- I don't know. Where should I put it, Fjord? Where is going to make the thing burn and sink?

TRAVIS: Burn and sink? I don't know. I haven't burned a lot of boats.

SAM: What do we want, fire or sink?

MARISHA: Fire.

TRAVIS: Fire, right?

MARISHA: Fire!

TRAVIS: If you went above decks and went down into the hull and attached it right under the deck.

SAM: Great.

TRAVIS: That'll be a show.

SAM: I'll do that.

MATT: You go and attach it there below the deck.

SAM: And then, I mean, I've got to light it on fire or something so it'll explode.

MARISHA: How far back should we all be?

SAM: I don't know.

MARISHA: Okay.

SAM: Come with me, will you?

MARISHA: Gotta be close, make sure it works, yeah. (laughs)

SAM: All right. I guess, shall we make some sort of fuse, or just going to throw a Fireball at it?

LIAM: I could just lob this over here.

SAM: All right.

LIAM: Just a little bit.

SAM: Somewhere where we can run away.

SAM: This is not a Fireball. This is just a globule of fire.

SAM: Sure, but it will explode, so we just need to be far enough back.

LIAM: How far back?

SAM: Well, we're below decks?

TRAVIS: Are you going to set it off while you're in the ship?

LIAM: No.

SAM: I mean, yes, I have no fuse.

TRAVIS: (laughing) Yes, no! (laughter)

SAM: I have no fuse, so.

TRAVIS: You definitely don't want to be on or near the ship.

LIAM: I mean, the entire ship is made of wood. We could just set the boat on fire.

SAM: Let's do that. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Is it as loud as a depth charge?

SAM: We'll set the boat on fire, but we'll leave the depth charge in, and when the fire reaches it, kaboom!

LIAM: There you go.

TALIESIN: Working together!

TRAVIS: Starting to gel!

MARISHA: We have a great knowledge of demolition.

TRAVIS: Holy shit. How do we run anything?

MARISHA: I don't know.

LIAM: That was like a 19-point three-point turn. (car revving) (laughter)

MATT: All right, so placing the charge onto the upper deck of the deck, you all take a safe distance, and then what do you do?

LIAM: I just start using Fire Bolt to light this boat and maybe the one next to it on fire.

MATT: It is a cantrip, so you can do it indefinitely. It does take you a while, because, one, it's a moist interior, and looks like a lot of the wood here is somewhat--

LAURA: (giggles)

MATT: Goddamn it.

TALIESIN: Been all night. It's been all night. There's no one else. Okay.

MATT: Missed you too, Laura. (laughter) So it takes you a while to get the wood-- (laughter)

LIAM: Tell me more about the wood.

MATT: You get the wood dry enough. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Dry that wood.

MARISHA: Mm-hmm. Make it so dry for you. (laughter, sounds of disgust)

LIAM: Actually, with Control Flames, which is a cantrip I have, I can, with one action, make five feet, turn into another five feet, into another five feet. So with that--

MATT: Yeah. Once it catches, you can switch to that, and as you do, the flames begin to spread and engulf the exterior and upper deck area of the Fiona.

LIAM: That's my cantrip.

MATT: As it begins to burn bright, the interior of the cavern is now being warmly lit in the immediate vicinity of the ship, and you watch as the flames spread and spread and-- (explosion)

ALL: (gasping)

MATT: The detonation rocks the interior and you watch as the deck sprays a splintering cloud of shards of burning wood. The mast-- (crumbling)

TRAVIS: Yeah!

MATT: Falls at the side, now itself engulfed in flames, and the ship is... It's a goner, and it's just now on fire, and you can see, slowly, it's beginning to capsize a bit to one side.

LIAM: I look over to Yasha and say: Once you burn one ship, it's kind of hard to stop.

SAM: No, no! (laughter)

MARISHA: Oh, yeah. Yeah. (laughs)

LIAM: (flame whooshing)

SAM: No, no!

TRAVIS: Tackle him! (laughter)

SAM: We can all hide or something.

MATT: After a short time, you hear (rock rumbling) You feel a universal rumble. You watch as certain small elements of rock and stone begin to (splashing)

LAURA: Uh-oh.

MATT: -- from the inside.

MARISHA: Is this roof going to collapse?

LAURA: You put the roof on us? Should we get in the bubble?

SAM: It's okay, it's fine, take cover.

LIAM: I've got a pearl on my head and I'm starting to cast Fortune's Favor.

MATT: The rumbling begins to subside a bit to just a low, continuous rumble. (rumbling)

MARISHA: Does that mean he's coming?

TRAVIS: We spread out.

LAURA: I'm going to make sure I'm standing next to Beau, and you should make sure you're standing next to Yasha.

TALIESIN: All right.

ASHLEY: Okay, okay.

MATT: Okay.

ASHLEY: Wait, is the--

MATT: A few more moments pass. What's up?

ASHLEY: No, no, it's okay.

MATT: A few moments pass. The rumbling continues. The ship is now burning and slowly, (bubbling) it is sort of sinking, and it's hitting the edge of the sand bank, so it's sinking and beginning to tumble to the side to find itself to a deeper portion of the cavern, which now puts flames partially obscuring the exit from where the--

SAM: Good.

MATT: (laughs) The waterfall is, but not entirely. The rumbling continues. It continues, unchanging.

LAURA: Uh.

MATT: It's a perpetual rumble.

TRAVIS: How's the temperature?

MATT: Of the chamber?

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MATT: It's the same.

MARISHA: Can I put my hand in the water?

MATT: Sure.

MARISHA: Does the water feel the same temperature as before, or warmer?

MATT: Currently, the water feels same temperature.

LAURA: Can I try using... I'm going to get down and kneel down on the deck of whatever boat we're on right now.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: And I'm going to try use Divine Intervention.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: To get the Traveler's attention here.

MATT: What are you trying to do? What are you asking for with the Divine Intervention?

LAURA: I'm going to ask the Traveler to help us get Vokodo out of his--

TRAVIS: To fuck him. (laughter)

LAURA: Get him here.

MATT: All right. Go ahead and make a roll.

LAURA: Aw, I really shouldn't have said fuck him when I was talking to the dragon turtle. I really feel like I messed everything up with--

TRAVIS: You said fuck him! (laughter)

LIAM: (as Jester) We are going to peg Vokodo.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

LAURA: (bitter laugh)

TRAVIS: Oh, what? Say yes.

LAURA: Oh, no, no. It's too high, it's too high. It's close, but it's too high.

MATT: Curses. As you reach out, the Traveler through your head, you hear the voice go, "Really'd love to help. Currently dealing with some really shitty travel buddies at the moment. So sorry, but soon! (growls)" You can hear the frustration in his voice, not with you, but he seems to be preoccupied. The rumbling continues. Occasionally, it spikes. (rumbling)

TRAVIS: Hmm.

MATT: (loud rumbling)

MARISHA: One of you guys that can do illusions and stuff. Should you be like, "Oh, shit! They're destroying all the boats in Heaven's Falls, oh no!"

MATT: Vilya closes her eyes for a second, and as she does, you see her face like... very faint flames licking up the sides of her forearms.

SAM: Oh.

MATT: (rumbling) She thinks. "I have a bad feeling, hold on." And she transforms into a regular owl. Not a large one, a regular one. Coasts past the flames of the sinking ship, the Fiona, and heads through the illusion to the side, best she can, of the waterfall, and vanishes out of sight.

MARISHA: Great. We're never going to see her again.

LIAM: She's gone to--

LAURA: Check it out.

LIAM: -- get an aerial.

TRAVIS: (imitating smoke)

LAURA: She just said it was a really bad idea to go through that thing as a bird, and then she did it.

MARISHA: Yeah.

LAURA: So it must be pretty serious. (laughter)

MATT: Yeah. As a large bird, yes. She comes back through from the other side a moment later and lands, retransforms. "Well, it's erupting." (laughter)

MARISHA: Hmm, hmm.

MATT: And you feel another (rumbling) Rumble. (laughter)

SAM: We suck at this game!

MATT: More stones are... (splashes)

LIAM: I'm hoping that Caleb has had enough time, a minute, to cast Fortune's Favor.

MATT: Yes.

LIAM: I think it's time to go--

TRAVIS: In.

LIAM: Into the butthole.

TRAVIS: I agree.

LIAM: Immediately.

LAURA: We're not going to get him out of here?

TRAVIS: One thing. If he's pissed and that's what's causing the volcano to erupt, the water will be boiling. It's going to be very hot.

MARISHA: Yeah.

SAM: (high-pitched) So why are we going to go in, then?

TRAVIS: I think we forgot to talk about that part. Remember he got mad and it started to get a little warm?

LAURA: Yeah, you remember?

MARISHA: Saving throws.

SAM: Are we going to lie? Are we going to say, like, "Oh, it was crazy! It was crazy! Someone's destroying your ships! We tried to stop them!" Or...

TRAVIS: We're going in, and we've got five minutes--

LAURA: Or do we say fuck it, and we try to keep destroying the ships, and hope he'll come out?

TRAVIS: Blow another one up.

LAURA: Do one more.

MARISHA: How many boats are burning?

ASHLEY: Oh, man.

MARISHA: How many boats are on fire?

SAM: Just two. One?

MATT: Just the Fiona, that's it.

MARISHA: Maybe we should blow up more boats?

ASHLEY: I feel like he'd let them all burn.

SAM: This is a terrible idea!

LAURA: You think?

TRAVIS: I don't know. If people start smashing your shit, and you've got 20 of something and they only break one, you're like, "Eh, not so bad."

LAURA: "I'm pissed."

TRAVIS: Halfway through there, you're like, "Fuck it!" Unlocking the door and coming out, right?

SAM: That's what I would do.

ASHLEY: Try it.

MATT: It's up to you guys. What are you going to do?

MARISHA: What if he's trapped in the volcano and he can't come out no matter how hard he wants to?

TRAVIS: Wants to come out.

MARISHA: Hmm hmm.

SAM: You could be right. It could be safe for him in there or something. I don't know.

TALIESIN: I think he's stuck in there.

MATT: What are you doing?

TRAVIS: You want to smoke another boat, or we going in?

LIAM: Caleb's already burning the next ship. (laughter)

MATT: Which ship are you burning?

SAM: The Banshee.

LAURA: Whatever's next to the Fiona.

LIAM: Whatever's next to the Fiona.

MATT: All right.

TRAVIS: Caleb's just like (groans).

MATT: That's right. (laughs) You guys look over and just already just lobbing Fire Bolt.

TRAVIS: With straight hair sticking out. (groans)

TALIESIN: Okay, we're doing this.

MATT: This ship continues to burn slowly. It takes about 10 minutes or so for it to become a fair inferno. The sails begin to catch, and you watch as the Sea Banshee becomes another burning ship. It's going to take a little bit, but it is now on fire. Are you going to leave that and move to another one? What are you doing?

LIAM: I will until someone tells me different.

LAURA: No, no, no, no, no.

TRAVIS: Burn it. Keep going.

TALIESIN: Keeping Resistance up.

TRAVIS: We don't need these ships. He does.

MATT: Third ship or not?

LIAM: Has anything changed at all in the 10 minutes that Caleb spent?

MATT: As it begins to burn, you hear and feel another (rumbling) another heavy reverberance, almost like an explosion from the outside, and you all can feel and hear it from the inside of this chamber.

TRAVIS: He's just like a uranium rod that's overreacting.

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: (roaring fire)

LAURA: Oh, god.

TRAVIS: We got to go. We got to go in.

LAURA: We got to go in. We're going to kill everybody.

TRAVIS: We're going to kill ourselves.

LAURA: If they're not already dead.

TRAVIS: But we got to go in.

MARISHA: Yeah, we're sitting--

LAURA: We're going to die, you guys. This could kill us all.

MATT: What are you doing?

TRAVIS: You know, we don't have to go in. (laughs) We could just go outside and wait.

SAM: We could just leave everyone here to die. (laughs)

TRAVIS: Yeah, Vilya can step through a tree, take us to another continent.

MATT: The second ship is now beginning to sink as you guys are waiting. Rumbling continuing. What are you doing?

TRAVIS: We're going in, right?

MARISHA: Vilya. Have you ever wanted to go to Wildemount?

LAURA: We should go in.

MATT: "Not particularly."

MARISHA: (sighs) Okay, we should go in.

LAURA: We have to save everyone.

MARISHA: Okay.

TRAVIS: Everybody on a rope?

SAM: We go in?

TRAVIS: Let's jump into the water.

MATT: You guys are going in?

TRAVIS: Yes, yes?

ASHLEY: Yes.

TRAVIS: Yes?

MARISHA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Thumbs up?

MARISHA: Yes!

TRAVIS: Form Voltron. Get your thumb up!

MARISHA: No, come on, Veth!

TRAVIS: Get your thumb up, Veth!

LAURA: How long did we say it took to get through the tunnels?

MARISHA: An hour.

MATT: From the other side, it was about an hour, yeah.

LAURA: Jesus, okay.

SAM: From the other side. This side, we don't know how long it takes.

MATT: You don't know long it will take from this side.

SAM: It could be less.

TRAVIS: We don't even know where this goes.

LAURA: I'm going to be behind Beau and I'm just going to be ready to, as soon as I see the opening into the cavern, hit her and cast Freedom of Movement.

MATT: You've got it.

TRAVIS: I'm a super-fast swimmer too, like him.

SAM: Are we all tied together still?

LAURA: We're all holding onto the rope, but it didn't matter the last time.

TALIESIN: Actually, if you get there, you undo it, yeah.

MATT: All right. So you guys all dive into the water.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Oh, boy.

SAM: Fuck!

LIAM: Terrible.

TRAVIS: Feels great.

MATT: (splashes) You all dive in. Vilya uncomfortably dives in with you. The water is warmer.

SAM: Sure.

MARISHA: Oh, so it's gotten warmer.

MATT: It's gotten warmer.

MARISHA: -- since I checked.

MATT: And as opposed to when you first touched it, the cold ocean temperature is now a lukewarm, a little above room temperature warmth. It's like a comfortable bath.

LIAM: That's just because we nervously peed in it, though.

MATT: Well, there's that too.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MATT: So what is the marching order for this entering?

LAURA: We're going to burn alive the minute we get in there.

MARISHA: Fjord is going to lead us.

MATT: Fjord is leading. Who's after Fjord?

TRAVIS: Beau.

MARISHA: I'll be after, yeah.

TRAVIS: It's Jester.

MATT: All right.

LAURA: Can't we just, like...

MARISHA: And then Yasha and Caduceus.

MATT: Wait, Yasha's after there?

MARISHA: After Beau.

MATT: And then it's Yasha, and then Caduceus.

MARISHA: Uh-huh.

MATT: All righty. And then?

SAM: Me, I guess. Us.

LIAM: Sure, yeah, no. (laughter) Don't put me last. Don't put me last. I'll go behind the firbolg.

MATT: Vilya will go last.

SAM: I'll go last.

MATT: All right. So you swim down and you can see the glowing orange entrance of the torchbloom plants that represent the beginning of this. Fjord, as you get there, I need you to go ahead and make a wisdom saving throw for me with advantage.

TRAVIS: Yeah. With advantage. 14.

MATT: 14.

MARISHA: (laughs)

MATT: As you approach, you see it, and you begin to get in front of the tunnel, and you get there and go, "Okay. Okay, I know where it is. I know where it is. I got to get there, I got to get there." And you take off.

LAURA: So, he's holding the rope, so all of us just start--

MATT: All of you guys... Well, no, you're already swimming fast, but you now swim with purpose, and something is guiding you the right path now.

TRAVIS: I know where to go.

MATT: One after the next.

MARISHA: He's got the bug.

MATT: Could everybody roll a wisdom saving throw for me with advantage, please?

MATT: Jester.

LAURA: 24.

MATT: 24.

LIAM: 22.

SAM: 19.

ASHLEY: 18.

TALIESIN: 24.

MARISHA: 16.

MATT: 16. Everyone but Beauregard is able to hold onto their mental state, but Beauregard, you also find yourself pushed forward. Now, you're all single file, so--

MARISHA: Yeah, captain! Let's go!

TRAVIS: Yeah!

MATT: So, the two of you are just rushing through the tunnels, so you can see where it branches off. Initially, one splinter and then three, and then it just becomes like numerous tunnels that splinter off, these lava tubes that are within the water. But the two people that are leading it seem to know where they're going.

LAURA: Great.

MATT: And following their lead, you rush through for five, 10, 15, 20 minutes. The water getting slightly warmer as you progress. Not uncomfortable, but warmer. You're now getting to that, like... Almost to a hot shower-type temperature, where it's prickly, but it's tolerable. Roughly 35 minutes of rapid swimming, which the rest of you are starting feeling really nervous. The only light that's present here, because they have night vision, you can't see down here, Caleb, so you're going to have to keep some lights up with you if you want to be able to follow.

LIAM: But at the moment I'm roped, right?

MATT: Yeah. So are you just letting the rope take you?

LIAM: For now, yeah.

MATT: Okay. I need you, Caleb, to go ahead and make a dexterity saving throw for me.

LIAM: Okay.

LAURA: Would the fire flowers give off any kind of glow?

MATT: Actually, no. The torchbloom does give off a little bit of light.

LIAM: I thought.

MATT: So yes. You are totally right. So what'd you roll?

LIAM: I got a 20!

MATT: A 20. All right. So, even letting the rope take you, you push away at times to keep yourself from colliding with the sides of the tunnel, the orange... It feels like an odd similarity to... My brain keeps going to the other side in Poltergeist, how you're just this continuous tunnels that just continue to shift and change, and they move with the water, as the torchbloom shifts with the swimming and the separation of the liquid you guys are swimming through. Eventually, you see it begins to widen, as both Fjord and Beauregard make your way towards what looks to be a familiar but different opening into a chamber.

LAURA: Oh, as soon as I see the opening-- (splutters) I cast Freedom of Movement on Beau.

MATT: Okay, Beauregard, you have Freedom of Movement.

MARISHA: Dope.

MATT: Anybody else do anything before you get to him?

LIAM: Mirror Image.

LAURA: Freedom of Movement on Yasha.

TALIESIN: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: I'll throw up Mage Hand.

MATT: Sure.

LIAM: I'm casting Mirror Image.

MATT: Mirror Image on yourself, all right. Anything else? Okay.

LAURA: Can I do something else? Or since I cast Freedom of Movement, is that my only thing I can do?

MATT: As you're approaching... They begin to slow down as they get to the edge point. You can do it if you want to keep it subtle.

LAURA: Right before we go through, I wanted to Invoke Duplicity.

MATT: Okay, yeah, that's easy enough.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: You can do it. Okay. So Duplicity has been Invoked.

SAM: This plan cannot fail.

MARISHA: Oh my god.

SAM: We have the element of surprise...

LAURA: We got to go fast.

SAM: What are we doing?

LAURA: Just go in and attack.

SAM: We're just (exclaiming)?

MARISHA: This feels like the most we've planned and the least we've planned all at the same time.

LAURA: Literally, I think we go in immediately and attack, the minute we go through the door.

MATT: As you guys enter the chamber--

SAM: What could go wrong?

MATT: -- there are still those pockets of torchbloom that give off a little bit of light throughout the chamber, but it's still a heavily shaded space. You see the familiar stalactites that curl down from the ceiling. This, you're pretty sure, is the exact chamber where you first encountered Vokodo, just from a different perspective. You found an entrance from another side. The temperature in here is quite hot. The water itself, it's beginning to numb the skin a little bit in places with the volume of heat that's within.

MARISHA: Any sign of Vokodo?

MATT: Make a perception check.

TALIESIN: I'll join in that.

MARISHA: Maybe he's busy, operating the volcano.

SAM: Yeah, the levers and stuff.

MARISHA: Yeah, exactly.

TRAVIS: He's the wizard.

MARISHA: Yeah! Okay, 18?

TALIESIN: 17. Hmm.

MATT: Okay. You glance up and catch the first sight as in the ceiling portion where he was first spotted when you came through, you see these burning red orbs, these angry eyes, four of them, looking back in your direction, as tendrils (whooshing, crunching) and it pulls its way down like some sort of massive coal-colored cephalopod.

TRAVIS: Cool, cool.

MATT: (as Vokodo) "What have you done?" And as he yells, the whole chamber-- (rumbling) quakes angrily.

LAURA: Guiding Bolt.

MARISHA: Yeah!

MATT: Well, we're going to go ahead and take a break. (laughter) And jump back into this beforehand, but as part of that, let me go ahead and set the battle map. (clamoring)

ASHLEY: Oh, boy.

SAM: This impending TPK is brought to you by Dwarven Forge. The journey out into the Wildlands, Dwarven Forge's eighth terrain Kickstarter, launches this weekend. Check it out at DwarvenForge.com/Wildlands. (clamoring)

MARISHA: Sometimes I see him buying pretty things, and then I learn later that they're to destroy us.

MATT: (laughs)

ASHLEY: That is beautiful!

TRAVIS: Oh, it's for all the fish you don't have.

MARISHA: (laughs) Yeah!

SAM: Any time you see an aquarium receipt on your credit card bill, please text us. (laughter)

TRAVIS: We've got a early warning system!

MARISHA: I will!

LAURA: There we go.

SAM: Pet store? No, no, something's wrong!

ASHLEY: Look at this!

TRAVIS: Oh, shit.

LAURA: Wow!

ASHLEY: That is so cool!

SAM: Whoa.

MATT: Have essentially entered from this side.

SAM: The element of surprise.

MATT: Exactly.

LIAM: I mean, we've been doing Guiding Bolt up the butt since campaign one, so--

MARISHA: It's appropriate.

LAURA: Right?

MATT: So you guys can tell me where you would like to be distributed at this point as you enter the chamber.

LIAM: Outside the volcano on Vo.

TALIESIN: Rumblecusp.

MATT: Loosely in this space, because that's as far as you've gotten there.

LAURA: Fjord and Beau are the first ones out, so you guys could get the farthest, or wherever you'd want to be, and he is, what, directly above us?

MARISHA: Yeah, where is he?

MATT: He is up here. Like, just emerging from the upper portions of the chamber and swimming--

MARISHA: How far can we get?

MATT: Right now, to where we start, is about this inch of space here. Just tell me where in that space you want to be.

MARISHA: I'll try and, uh... Gosh. Can I even try and get up here, or?

TALIESIN: You have Freedom of Movement from her.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: You do, but for the purposes of this, this is just arriving, and this is happening here, so...

SAM: I'll hook right with Caleb, if you're up for it.

LIAM: Yeah, yeah. To get behind that column, yeah.

SAM: That thing.

MATT: Okay, that's as far as you guys can get from stepping into the chamber.

MARISHA: Oh, you guys are behind? Okay, then actually, put me opposite. Put me on this wall over here, Matt, yeah.

MATT: That's about as far as you can get from the entrance there.

MARISHA: That's great.

MATT: Best to scatter. Caduceus?

TALIESIN: I guess I'm just-- Yeah, or right to the left so I have a partial cover from the column.

MATT: Over here?

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: Yeah, I got a plan.

MATT: Vilya's going to come right here. Yasha?

TRAVIS: Where is Vokodo, ish?

LAURA: Above us.

MATT: Up here.

TRAVIS: Oh, cool, yeah.

ASHLEY: Yeah, let me go to the other side of Jester.

SAM: How could we have fucked this up this badly?

LIAM: So much planning--

MATT: Over here?

ASHLEY: Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

LIAM: -- and debating and discussion.

LAURA: And then we just ran in.

LIAM: We just walked in and done the same thing.

MARISHA: Well...

MATT: Now, remember.

MARISHA: It was a good plan.

MATT: You are swimming, so you can go--

LAURA: Up and down.

MATT: Up and down. There's upward, vertical travel in this.

TRAVIS: How tall is the cavern?

MATT: The cavern up here is roughly 80 feet.

TRAVIS: 80 feet.

SAM: And is it all water to the top, no?

MATT: You haven't swam all the way up there, but from what you can currently see it seems like it might be.

SAM: Oh shit.

ASHLEY: My god.

TRAVIS: You just peek your head out and it's just magma. (burning and screaming) (laughter)

LIAM: There's this much oxygen.

TALIESIN: We can swim in here?

MATT: Yes, you can.

TALIESIN: We can go up?

MATT: Yep. But those of you that do not have Freedom of Movement, or have a swim enchantment, like you do, it's half movement and all attack rolls made with weapons are at disadvantage.

SAM: Oof.

MATT: So just be aware.

LAURA: But Freedom of Movement, that is not the case?

MATT: Correct. So you guys don't have to worry about that. Spells don't have to worry about it. Ranged weapons have their own unique little weird thing.

SAM: Sure. Like, if I fire from cover, which would normally be advantage, this would be at disadvantage, so it would just be a straight roll?

MATT: Specifically on this, let me get the rules, because this will definitely impact how you deal with this particular battle. (pages flipping)

MARISHA: The D-Turt idea was very great.

MATT: It was really great. I really wanted it to work out, I'm so sorry.

TRAVIS: 20 DC, huh?

MATT: 20 DC, yeah.

LIAM: Kaiju fight?

MARISHA: It would've been great.

MATT: Here we go. "Ranged weapon automatically misses if it's beyond the weapon's normal range."

SAM: I have good range.

MATT: So what's your first range increment?

SAM: Uh...

MARISHA: Don't you have Sharpshooter?

SAM: I just got a feat, or whatever, so... Well, it hasn't updated, but I think it's 120 feet.

MATT: For your hand crossbow?

LIAM: Because of Sharpshooter.

LAURA: Oh, yeah, Sharpshooter.

SAM: Sharpshooter.

LAURA: Which gives you 120 feet.

MATT: Let me double-check.

SAM: "Attacking at long range doesn't impose disadvantage on your ranged weapon attack."

MATT: Right, it's still long range, though. It's still the standard range.

SAM: Got it. So 30 feet is my limit.

MATT: Correct. If you fire further than 30 feet from it, it's going to automatically miss.

SAM: Got it.

MATT: So keep that in mind, and...

TRAVIS: Oh, oh, oh. That's significant.

MATT: "Any attack has disadvantage unless the weapon is a crossbow." So it does not have disadvantage, but the bolt only goes as far as 30 feet before it floats.

SAM: Okay.

LIAM: Let's go, brawlers.

MATT: All right.

LAURA: Great. But bonus on Freedom of Movement is you can't be... Let me--

MARISHA: Can't be grappled.

LAURA: You can't be grappled, yeah.

MATT: Correct.

LAURA: And you can automatically escape from any non-magical restraints with just using five feet of movement.

MATT: That's phenomenal. So keep that in mind. That might come in handy. All right. We're going to go ahead and take a break here, and return here for whatever this battle's going to look like.

SAM: Yeah.

MATT: In the middle of an angry erupting volcano and whatever Vokodo is. So we'll see you guys back here after the break shortly. Be ready. (clamoring)

Break
♪ You got the perfect warlock ♪ ♪ Her weapons and supplies ♪ ♪ But you need a place to track your stuff ♪ ♪ 'Cause you're so disorganized ♪ ♪ You click open a web page ♪ ♪ You heard about on Critical Role ♪ ♪ And now you're ready to kick some butt ♪ ♪ In a mineshaft full of gnolls ♪ ♪ It's D&D ♪ ♪ D&D ♪ ♪ D&D Beyond ♪ ♪ Yeah D&D ♪ ♪ D&D ♪ ♪ D&D Beyond ♪ ♪ You got your staffs ♪ ♪ You got your swords ♪ ♪ And you got your invisible wand ♪ ♪ It's D&D ♪ ♪ D&D ♪ ♪ D&D ♪ ♪ D&D ♪ ♪ D&D Beyond ♪ (upbeat music)

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Part II
MATT: And welcome back. So picking right up where we left off, you all had entered--

LAURA: Oh, no!

MATT: -- the interior home, central chamber, beneath the volcano of Rumblecusp where Vokodo resides. And let's go ahead and get that on the board. (groaning)

LIAM: Oh, look at that, it's so small!

ASHLEY: Oh, my goodness gracious.

LAURA: He's so sparkly!

MARISHA: He lights up.

MATT: It's where the heat from the mouth comes from.

TALIESIN: ♪ Motorin'. ♪

LIAM: Holy shit.

ASHLEY: ♪ Motorin'. ♪

LAURA: (yelling)

SAM: It's too big!

TALIESIN: Yeah, that's pretty big.

ASHLEY: That's really big.

LAURA: It's a pretty big...

MATT: So--

LAURA: Oh, no.

MARISHA: Look at the treasure chest on his back. That's so cute!

MATT: I'd like you all to roll initiative. (groaning)

TRAVIS: Oh, god.

LIAM: It's like a bunch of dog poops with treasure swirled into it.

MARISHA: (sighing)

TALIESIN: Gross.

LIAM: Aw, damn it! I don't want a high initiative.

TRAVIS: Are you fucking kidding me?

LIAM: I'll watch.

TALIESIN: It's okay, I should go last anyway. Healer should go last.

LIAM: I hate going first with Caleb.

TRAVIS: I'm definitely last.

SAM: I don't know.

TALIESIN: I don't know.

TRAVIS: Can you roll...

MATT: 20 or 25?

MARISHA: 21.

SAM: Yeah!

ASHLEY: Yes.

LIAM: 21.

SAM: Whoa!

MARISHA: Ah, fuck, Caleb! What?

TRAVIS: Caleb and Beau?

SAM: ♪ Empire. ♪

LAURA: (laughs)

MATT: Caleb, what'd you get?

LIAM: 21.

MARISHA: Also 21.

LAURA: But Beau's dex is higher.

TRAVIS: So Beau first.

SAM: I don't know about that.

LIAM: I mean... Let's have a push-up contest.

MARISHA: Okay. (laughs)

MATT: 20 to 15?

ASHLEY: 15 for me.

MATT: 15, all right.

MARISHA: Nice.

LIAM: Oh, shit.

MATT: 15 to 10?

LAURA: 12.

MATT: 12 for Jester. 10 to 5?

TALIESIN: Five.

SAM: (bad American accent) I rolled an eight. (laughter)

MATT: Thank you, Sam Riegel.

SAM: I'm a American soldier. (laughter)

ASHLEY: He looks so cool.

LAURA: This is really beautiful.

ASHLEY: It's so cool.

LAURA: What a good environment for us all to die.

MATT: Yeah, if you're going to go. And then--

LIAM: Is there a light in Vokodo, or is it behind him?

MATT: Fjord?

MARISHA: It's in his mouth.

ASHLEY: Oh, no.

LAURA: Fjord!

ASHLEY: Does he have a light on his back?

TRAVIS: (laughs)

LAURA: There's a light in his mouth?

MARISHA: Mouth.

ASHLEY: That's his mouth?

MARISHA: Mm-hmm.

LIAM: You're a very handsome man, Travis.

MATT: Right there.

LAURA: (groaning)

ASHLEY: Oh, that is so cool.

TALIESIN: None of this is happening.

SAM: You could use that as a emergency flashlight to find your keys and stuff.

MATT: Exactly. It's what it's there for. So, top of the round, as Vokodo pulls forward, shouting at you all, the water itself around you seems to almost bubble in places, and the heat is rising all around you. Beauregard, you're up first, with Caleb on deck.

MARISHA: Does Jester get her Guiding Bolt as a surprise?

MATT: Wasn't a surprise round.

MARISHA: Oh.

MATT: He wasn't surprised. He knew you guys were coming. So you initiating the Guiding Bolt... So, you begin casting the Guiding Bolt, because it's like a incantation. Combat starts, initiative now, so as you're casting the spell, Beauregard rushes past you.

LAURA: Okay. I don't know if I'll still want to do Guiding Bolt by the time it's my turn, but...

MATT: Up to you, then. You can change before you get there.

LIAM: What's the lighting like in here? For the humans and all that.

MATT: For the humans, it's low light. Aside from the orange little patches you see of where the different colors of orange are, there is a 10-foot radius of bright light around it, and then it is low light everywhere else in the chamber.

LIAM: Okay.

SAM: Does low light means we cannot see anything, or...

MATT: No, it just means for perception checks, it's at disadvantage. At a certain point for details beyond that... Range attacks might be involved, but, you know, let's see when we get there. So, anyway, Beauregard. What are you doing?

MARISHA: Wow. I just lost feeling in my knees. I would like to swim up to it, I guess. I would like to swim up to it, I guess.

MATT: Right up front here?

SAM: God punching.

MARISHA: (stammering) How much speed was that to get there?

MATT: To get there?

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: 25.

MARISHA: Okay. Can I get on top of his head? Can I get on above it?

MATT: Sure, yeah, I'll let you do that, since you have enough speed as a Monk.

SAM: Jeez.

MARISHA: (exhales)

MATT: So as you swim up over, as you rush up over, you feel the heat blasting out of its mouth as it lights up the front of Beau as you skid past, the water around its mouth itself is almost boiling. As you move up, you see the four eyes in the head (clicking) clock you as you swim past them, and then above you can see the massive collection of coins and knickknacks and pottery of coins and knickknacks and pottery and weird furniture, all sorts of all things that have been collected over time by Vokodo. What are you doing?

MARISHA: Okay, okay. I'm legitimately light-headed. I'm going to swim up over him, and I'm going to try and use one of the things that's attached to his back to give me some leverage to come down and power-bomb him from above.

MATT: Go for it.

ASHLEY: Yes!

MATT: (thudding)

LIAM: (bubbling)

MATT: Both fists out.

MARISHA: What are we doing? Oh god! (gasping) Pop pop! Okay! 27 and 18.

MATT: Both hit.

LAURA: Oh, that's good!

TRAVIS: 18 hits.

MARISHA: 18 hits.

ASHLEY: Okay, okay.

TALIESIN: Low AC.

LIAM: (Cartman voice) Come on, you guys. Let's kill Vokodo.

MARISHA: (exhales shakily)

LAURA: (laughs)

MARISHA: First attack. Yeah, okay, okay, okay, okay. First attack is an eight, so that's cool. 14 damage. Stunning Strike.

MATT: 14 points of bludgeoning damage, Stunning Strike. Ah, all right. He's going to go ahead and use a Legendary Resistance to not be stunned.

TRAVIS: Legendary Resistance.

MARISHA: One Resistance down! So nervous.

LAURA: Has he got three Resistances per round, or three Resistances?

SAM: We don't know.

MATT: You don't know.

LAURA: (groaning)

SAM: But he just used a Resistance.

TRAVIS: I love it when you give us the nonchalant, "You don't know." I love it.

MARISHA: He just used one.

TRAVIS: The wiggle that comes with it.

MARISHA: With the Stunning Strike. Second attack. Wow. The opposite in the spectrum, seven damage.

MATT: Okay. Seven damage.

MARISHA: A Stunning Strike.

MATT: Success.

MARISHA: Okay.

MATT: It's a 16, right? What's your DC on that?

MARISHA: 16.

MATT: 16.

MARISHA: Flurry of Blows.

MATT: Go for it.

MARISHA: For my bonus.

ASHLEY: Let's go.

MATT: Each of these punches, by the way, as you're punching him in the side, it's like (punching) searing your knuckles.

MARISHA: (exhales) (stammering) Water shouldn't be this hot. Okay, it's bad. 21 on the first one.

MATT: That hits.

MARISHA: And 13 on the second.

MATT: 13 misses.

MARISHA: Okay.

MATT: But the first one does hit. Go ahead and roll damage.

SAM: What'd you roll on the first one?

MARISHA: 21.

LAURA: 21. 18 hit, though.

TALIESIN: 18, 13 is what we're at right now.

MARISHA: And...

LIAM: Go, Beau.

SAM: Vokodo-regard! (laughter)

MARISHA: Oh no you Voko-don't-regard! (laughter) (laughs) 10 damage?

MATT: 10 points of damage, bludgeoning.

MARISHA: And Extract Aspects.

MATT: Okay. So, all three hits and you pull back, and the burning sensation from all the blows you laid into him do seven points of fire damage, total. With each hit, the sheer temperature of the surface of his hardened exterior burns your knuckles. It's like (burning) And as soon as you walk away, like, "Ah, fuck, that hurt!" So just know that hitting it with a melee hit seems to to burn you back.

MARISHA: (groans) It burns, it burns! He burns!

MATT: You do learn that he is resistant to bludgeoning, piercing, and slashing from non-magical attacks, is resistant to cold damage.

MARISHA: Resistant to cold damage?

MATT: And is immune to fire damage.

MARISHA: Ooh, okay.

TALIESIN: Not vulnerable to anything?

MATT: Not vulnerable to anything, no.

MARISHA: I just shout out: Obviously, think he's immune to fire. Surprisingly, resistant to cold. Didn't see that one coming. And then that's my turn.

SAM: Thanks for the commentary.

MATT: There you go. That finishes Marisha. Caleb, you're up.

LIAM: I'm going to just pull out the Driftglobe and say "Fajar" and cast Daylight-- (laughter) It's right here on the paper.

MATT: Yeah.

LIAM: Fajar.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

LIAM: I cast Daylight here inside the chamber. And then I would like to shimmy towards the right to try to block myself somewhat from his gaze.

MATT: Over here?

LIAM: Yeah.

SAM: Is there a gaze we should be worried about?

MATT: One, two, three's as much as you can move.

LIAM: Just line of sight.

MATT: You're swimming 15 feet with movement.

LIAM: Yeah. Right.

MATT: Are you going up at all or are you staying low, just try and block off from the--?

LIAM: Yeah, I will. I will go on a diagonal.

TRAVIS: I will.

MATT: A diagonal? All right. That'll put you about there.

ASHLEY: Fajar?

MATT: You've got it.

LIAM: Fajar.

ASHLEY: Fajar!

MARISHA: Fajarna.

MATT: Initiative count 20, lair action first.

LAURA: Oh, no!

TRAVIS: Wow.

TALIESIN: Paid the salt.

LIAM: This is fine.

ASHLEY: Oh, god. I'm getting nervous.

LAURA: (laughs)

LIAM: Remember when we spent two episodes preparing for this and it made no impact? (laughter)

SAM: Oh no. Laura Bailey, why?

MATT: In this vicinity--

ASHLEY: Oh.

MARISHA: We tried so hard to be good.

TRAVIS: What?

MATT: This strange wave of psychic energy emanates from the side of the wall.

LIAM: Nope.

MATT: And causes all of you to briefly shoot your attention straight towards Vokodo. I need everyone except for Caleb and Veth to go ahead and make a wisdom saving throw.

SAM: Hey!

TRAVIS: Advantage!

ASHLEY: Advantage, okay.

SAM: Also, for everyone who took a long rest, it might have gotten rid of your temporary hit points, so put those back up there.

LAURA: Oh, that's true.

MATT: Everyone has nine temporary hit points.

TRAVIS: Oh, good, good, good. 18.

MATT: 18. Jester?

LAURA: 27.

SAM: Ooh!

LIAM: I'm out of the way.

MATT: Yeah. Yasha?

ASHLEY: 13.

SAM: Balls.

TALIESIN: 29.

MATT: 29. Beauregard?

MARISHA: You didn't call me.

MATT: Oh, right, because you weren't there. You're right.

MARISHA: I'm on his head.

MATT: So, as all of you shift and look, you all shake it from view. However, Yasha, your vision suddenly begins to blur and swirl towards it, and there's something alluring.

ASHLEY: I have no wisdom.

MATT: And for the time being, you are hypnotized. You are charmed by it. (groaning)

MATT: On your turn, you're trying to get as close to it as you possibly can. You can only use your action to dash towards it.

LIAM: Man.

MATT: Until you're within five feet. At the end of each of your turns, you get to try and save from it. Right now, when it comes to your turn, all you can do is just get as close to it as you can. Similar to when you first entered these tunnels, you just need to get to this creature. It's drawing you towards it.

TRAVIS: We might have to hit you.

ASHLEY: Yeah. Okay. Well, I'm going to go to it.

MATT: Ah, well it's not your turn yet.

ASHLEY: Oh, I am so sorry.

LAURA: Oh, at the end of it?

LIAM: That's how charmed you are.

MATT: That's the lair action. Now it's Vilya and Vokodo. Both actually rolled the same initiative.

TRAVIS: Okay, okay, okay.

MARISHA: They're working together!

MATT: Vilya's a little bit higher on there, so she is going to go first. She, looking around in the space here, sees everyone's face shift. She also resists the effect. Looks about angrily, everything seems fine. She goes ahead and takes her staff, holds it in front of her, and begins swirling it overhead like this, and as it does, soot from the ground begins to lift up out of the ground and form these blackened clouds that begin to crackle over the top of this darkened chamber. (lightning crackling) She forms an underwater storm cloud

LAURA: Shit!

MARISHA: That's dope!

ASHLEY: So cool.

TRAVIS: Water's a hell of a conductor, though.

TALIESIN: Yeah. If we've learned anything about your mom, it's that water is not her favorite terrain. (groaning)

TRAVIS: Wow. Wow!

TALIESIN: It's been a rough month, Matt.

TRAVIS: That was some millennia shade!

MATT: She's going to cast it at 5th-level.

SAM: 5th-level?

MATT: She's casting it at 5th-level.

MARISHA: (laughs)

MATT: And with her bonus action, she's going to transform into a killer whale, which I do not have a mini for.

SAM: Ugh.

ASHLEY: Oh my god.

MATT: So instead I'm going to be using this, because it's roughly the size. That gives her a swim speed of 60, so she's going to go ahead and shift over here--

LIAM: That gator is insane.

MATT: -- on to the side over there, and swimming up against the side. As this killer whale spins around, a bolt shoots down towards Vokodo, who has to making a dexterity saving throw. Makes it. Natural 18. However, that puts the damage at 6th-level to-- Believe it's 5d10 points of lightning damage.

SAM: Hey!

LAURA: Ooh.

SAM: Go Vilya.

TRAVIS: That's serious.

MATT: Ooh, nice.

TALIESIN: Can I do a thing?

MATT: 33 points of damage, reduced to 16.

ASHLEY: I know. I'm nervous eating. (laughter)

MATT: 16 points of lightning damage.

ASHLEY: I'm sorry.

MATT: She's now a lightning storm-casting killer whale. Finishing Vilya's go, it is now Vokodo. The water is now getting to a subtle boil around you. While it's not damaging you this round, you gather it's probably going to start damaging you pretty soon just being in this chamber. But for Vokodo's turn, let's see what we got here. (dramatic battle music) Looking around at the space, the eye shifting, after it takes the blows from on top, to you, Beauregard, and then angrily, two of the eyes glare up towards you, and the voice gutturally growls within and goes, "(groans) Can't have that." I need you to make a wisdom saving throw for me.

TRAVIS: Fucking shit. Come on, Beau!

MARISHA: Thank god for these Heroes' Feasts, man. Okay, I rolled a 19 and an 18.

SAM: Whoa!

MARISHA: So my Wisdom save is plus four, so 23 total.

MATT: (dejected) Yeah, that'll do it. (laughter)

SAM: You angered the god Vokodo.

MARISHA: Lucky roll, lucky roll.

MATT: So, as the two eyes look towards you, you feel this psychic wave strike your brain and for a second, you feel like something is trying to grasp hold of your will, and you remember yourself back on that shoreline, meditating on the Menagerie Coast, and-- (shattering) you shatter that hold. No effect.

MARISHA: I just say: Ew, your eyes can look backwards. Gross. (laughter)

MARISHA: With that, he's going to attempt to move backward, like an octopus. (water rushing) Swirl back. You do get to take a reaction if you want to.

MARISHA: Yes, I do. Yeah, 25 to hit.

MATT: 25 hits. Go ahead and roll damage, and Sentinel--

MARISHA: Sentinel, he's not going anywhere. 11 damage.

MATT: 11 points of damage, okay. So he tries to move back, and Beauregard punches right back down in the head, taking another three points of fire damage. But in doing so, the eyes curl in and look back in different directions, briefly shaken, and it stays in place. You can now feel just the space around it is vibrating with anger. (growling) That's going to end Vokodo's turn. Yasha, for your turn, you spend the entirety of it swimming forward and getting as close as you can to Vokodo, which is right up there, and you just stand there and stare. You all watch as Yasha just floating in the water, stares, head slightly cocked to the side, either enthralled by the jewelry on its back or the actual entity itself. I need you, Yasha, to go ahead and make a Wisdom saving throw at the end of your turn.

TALIESIN: With advantage?

MATT: With advantage. This Heroes' Feast is going to save your guys' fucking ass, I swear to god.

ASHLEY: Cocked.

MARISHA: Shake it, shake it!

TRAVIS: Shake it good.

ASHLEY: 15? Nothing?

TALIESIN: Nothing, oh!

MATT: 15 does not succeed.

ASHLEY: (growling) You stand there holding your space, still glaring at it.

ASHLEY: All right.

MATT: At the end of your turn, it's going to go ahead and use a Legendary Action, since you're right up in its face now, to use its bite attack.

MARISHA: Shuck in the nose.

MATT: So as you're right there, its jaws begin to open, and you can see the elongated, pointed, almost obsidian-like teeth, reveal this bright yellow light that burns from the inside, like the heat itself has become like the front of a hooded lantern, but intensely more bright. You watch as Yasha's framed in dark shadow, from your guys' perspective behind her, before it (growls) lurches forward to try and bite down on her.

MARISHA: The deadlights.

MATT: That is going to be a... 22 to hit.

ASHLEY: (laughs) Yeah.

MATT: Okay. As it bites down on you, Yasha, you take...

TRAVIS: You don't need all those dice. You can just use half.

MATT: 17 points of slashing damage.

SAM: Oof!

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: Plus 10 points of fire damage.

TRAVIS: Great.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: And that's its Legendary Action on that round. Finishing Yasha's go. Jester, you're up.

LAURA: (sighs) Okay. Um...

TRAVIS: (stammering)

LAURA: This is going to-- (groans) I'm going to try to use up some of his... I'm going to cast Command.

MATT: Cast Command on him?

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Okay. What are you commanding?

SAM: Drown. (laughs)

MATT: (laughs)

LAURA: Grovel!

MATT: Grovel.

SAM: Oh!

MATT: Okay, that's a Wisdom saving throw?

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: 16. What's your DC?

LAURA: 17!

MARISHA: Oh my god.

MATT: 17? Yeah, he'll grovel.

TRAVIS: (gasping)

TRAVIS: You sound like you're not sweating it, though.

MARISHA: I know. I know.

TALIESIN: Are we starting this shit now, or are we waiting around?

SAM: What? Starting what?

MATT: So, next turn it'll fall prone and end its turn.

MARISHA: In terms of...

TRAVIS: He falls prone, like to the floor of the cavern?

MATT: Mm-hmm.

LAURA: Yeah, and he'll end his... So he won't take a turn?

MATT: He'll lose a turn.

LAURA: Okay.

SAM: He would rather lose a turn.

MATT: He still has Legendary Actions, though.

SAM: Yeah.

ASHLEY: How many Legendary Actions does he have?

LIAM: We don't know.

LAURA: We don't know.

ASHLEY: Okay.

LIAM: Don't know.

MATT: All right. Does that finish your go, Jester?

LAURA: Um.

MATT: You still have your bonus action.

LAURA: I'm going to move.

MATT: Where are you moving?

LAURA: I'm going to swim. I just want to not be in the cone. Can I swim towards Caleb and up?

MATT: Towards Caleb and up? Okay. Full 15 feet at an angle, you mean?

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Okay. We'll say that'll put you about there.

LAURA: Okay, I don't know. And I'm going to send my duplicate the full movement that I can towards Vokodo.

MATT: That'll be about there. Also higher up?

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: All right.

LAURA: I want her to come up underneath him, like under his belly, if she can.

MATT: Under his belly? Okay. I'll just say you're right there, and we'll understand it's under the belly. You got it. All right, end of your turn. Vokodo's going to go ahead and use two of the Legendary Actions to use Reflexive Magic.

LAURA: Well, she's not going to be directly underneath him if he's going to fall prone, so she's going to be, move back a little bit.

MATT: Okay. So, there?

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: Reflexive Magic?

MATT: Gonna use Reflexive Magic. So it gets to cast a spell at fourth level or lower as a Legendary Action.

TRAVIS: Jesus.

MATT: It's going to go ahead-- and you watch as Beauregard, you're right on top above it, and Yasha's right there in front of it. You watch the entire form of Vokodo just-- (rushing water) Vanishes.

MARISHA: Why?

LIAM: It was casting just then?

MATT: It was.

LIAM: Could I have eyes on, or am I hidden?

MATT: You would have eyes on.

LIAM: Counterspell.

MARISHA: Yes!

MATT: What's the range on Counterspell?

SAM: 60?

LIAM: I think that's right, hold on.

LAURA: 60?

LIAM: Yeah, it's 60 feet.

MATT: 60 feet. Definitely within range. It's a fourth-level spell, so I need you to go ahead and roll--

TRAVIS: Is he teleporting or going invisible?

MATT: Hmm?

LAURA: We don't know.

MATT: You don't know.

LIAM: No, I'll do it at fifth level.

MARISHA: Oh shit.

MATT: Okay. Okay. He stays put. You have Counterspelled his Dimension Door.

TRAVIS: (gasping)

TRAVIS: He was leaving, which...

SAM: Maybe. Or maybe he was just bouncing around the room.

LIAM: To a different place. Yeah, we don't know.

MATT: All right. That finishes Jester's go. Veth, you're up. Caduceus, you're in back.

SAM: Oh my god, I have to do something?

MATT: Yeah, you do.

SAM: I can't get within 30 feet of this dude, right?

MATT: Yeah, you could get within 30 feet.

SAM: Really?

MARISHA: (laughs) Were you hoping he was going to tell you no?

ASHLEY: (laughs) Yeah. I can't do this, right?

MARISHA: Yeah. (laughs)

ASHLEY: Can I just stay in my comfort zone?

SAM: And how does Sneak Attack work? It's engaged with Beau, but...

MATT: It's engaged with Beau. You have disadvantage on the attack roll. No, no, you don't, because it's a crossbow.

SAM: Yes.

MATT: So you have a 30 feet-- it's just a straight attack roll, and if it hits, because Beau and Yasha are within range, you do get Sneak Attack, at range.

SAM: Okay. Okay, then, I'll do that. I will swim as far as I need to to be within 30 feet.

MATT: Okay. Five, 10. You're probably swimming past Jester.

SAM: Sure.

MATT: And getting right about there.

SAM: I will fire.

MATT: Go for it. Roll an attack.

SAM: Okay, 22 to hit.

MATT: That hits. You can go ahead and roll damage.

SAM: All right. Oh, boy. (sighs) (intense, dramatic music)

SAM: Ay yai yai. 34 points of damage.

MATT: 34 points of damage, nice.

SAM: And then I will... I could hide, or go away?

MATT: You have nothing to hide right now. You're out in the open after firing your crossbow to get close enough.

SAM: All right. I'll just shoot again.

MATT: Go for it. Roll another attack.

SAM: And this one, I'll do Sharpshooter.

MATT: Okay, minus five to hit.

SAM: Yeah.

SAM: 21.

MATT: 21 and then...

SAM: So, 26.

MATT: Oh, then that does hit. Go ahead and roll damage with the plus 10 damage.

SAM: (groaning) 17 points.

MATT: Aw!

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MATT: Only over 50 damage in one round, aw! (laughter) So as you fire a second time, both of them (whoosh) sink into the sides, and the bolts split in. You watch as the bolts heat up red, just being stuck in the side of a creature this high in temperature. But it (groans and growls)

SAM: Uh-oh, doesn't like that. Oh god!

MATT: All right, that's your turn.

SAM: Yep.

MATT: Caduceus, you're up. Fjord, you're on deck.

TALIESIN: Um... Quick, Caleb, are you going for it? About to go for it?

LIAM: (stammering)

TALIESIN: Yeah, all right.

LIAM: Yeah.

MARISHA: (laughs)

TALIESIN: Am I within 30 feet of...?

MATT: You are just outside of 30-foot range.

TALIESIN: Can I get to 30 feet?

MATT: You can, yeah.

TALIESIN: Will I have room to try and take cover after getting there?

MATT: You, no. (laughs)

TALIESIN: Okay. I'm right in the middle of a bunch of people, aren't I?

LAURA: Yeah. We're just kind of clustered.

MATT: You could probably move here if you want to.

TALIESIN: And still be 30?

MATT: Maybe. You can try it and we can measure when you do.

TALIESIN: Fuck me, man. Okay. I hate it when you do that.

LAURA: (laughs)

MATT: So either you take cover, or not take cover and be sure. Your call.

TALIESIN: I'll not take cover.

MATT: Okay. So you can move about there and be sure that you can get him in 30 feet.

LAURA: Oh, I feel so pukey, y'all.

TALIESIN: Before I move there, I'm going to use my bonus action to turn invisible.

ASHLEY: (sighing)

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: Huh?

MATT: You vanish from sight, and then shift over--

TALIESIN: I'm going to hold a Divine Domain Channel Divinity for right before Caleb's attack.

MATT: Okay, okay.

LIAM: Harsh one. Harsh spell, that's going to--

MATT: So you're holding an action to Channel Divinity for Caleb's attack.

TALIESIN: Yeah. So, yeah, whatever Caleb does will be double damage.

MATT: Oh, for that one?

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: Does it say attack?

TALIESIN: It says the...

MATT: It does not function on spells unless the spells have an attack roll.

TALIESIN: Oh. Okay, never mind, then. I'm going to change my shit.

MATT: More of a combat-based thing, or for spells that have an array or have an attack roll involved.

TALIESIN: In that case, I'm going to attempt to cast Bane, then, on this thing, see if it sticks.

MATT: Okay. What's the save on that?

TALIESIN: 17.

MATT: 17 of which one?

TALIESIN: Charisma.

MATT: Charisma, ooh. It rolled a natural 19, even though it doesn't have a huge bonus on it, so it does resist Bane, unfortunately.

TALIESIN: It's all right.

MATT: Sorry. That's your action.

TALIESIN: My bonus action was turn invisible, but--

MATT: Right, so that's your turn.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: Right, finishing Caduceus. Fjord, you're up. Beau, you're on deck for the top of the round.

TRAVIS: I'm going to kick off the ocean floor and try and swim up behind this rock formation, trying to... Is that 30 feet? Can I get there in 30 feet?

MATT: Yeah, five, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30. Yes, you can.

TRAVIS: Okay. Before I slink behind that little spire there to break his line of sight with me, I'll fire--

MATT: You can't quite break his line of sight with 30 feet, but you're right on the edge there.

TRAVIS: Okay. Then I may keep my head above. I'll fire off two Eldritch Blasts and then I'll drop down low so that I'm behind that platform then, just so that I can stay low.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: Two Eldritch Blasts at him.

MATT: You got it.

TRAVIS: That's a 22 to hit.

MATT: That hits.

TRAVIS: Second one is... Oh, that's really good. A 28.

MATT: Both hit. Go ahead and roll damage.

TRAVIS: Eight plus five, plus two is 15. 15. That's total balls, but I can re-roll a one. 30 points of force damage.

SAM: Damn!

ASHLEY: Nice.

SAM: Of fjorce damage.

TRAVIS: Fjorce damage.

MATT: (laughs) And with that, you duck back down just below. We'll say it'll put you about there.

TRAVIS: Yeah, that's great, yeah.

MATT: So you don't get quite as far, but you use the rest of the movement to get back down.

TRAVIS: Mm-hmm.

MATT: Is that your turn?

TRAVIS: It is. Actually, I'm going to use my bonus action before I duck down to cast Hexblade's Curse on Vokodo. You fucker!

MATT: With that, he has been cursed.

TALIESIN: We all need convenient places to hang... (laughter)

ASHLEY: Only a couple.

MATT: There's quite a few options there.

TALIESIN: A lot of coat hangers.

MATT: Okay. That finishes your go, Fjord. As you pull back behind, you can watch as some of the long-dead plant matter in here begins to bloom green and then shoot out, and sink into the crevices around its body as the curse takes hold, the Wild Mother now bound in there with the Warlock energy.

TRAVIS: The Wild Mother has entered the fight.

MATT: Indeed. All right, Beau, you're up. Caleb, you're on deck.

MARISHA: All right. I am going to wait and rear up for my opportunity, and as soon as I see one of his tentacles whip overhead, I'm going to leap and jump off. I'm going to grab it swashbuckler-style, and use that to swing around and come back at him with a double donkey kick to the face!

MATT: Around that side?

LAURA: Yeah!

MARISHA: Yeah!

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: That works great.

SAM: Is it all in slow motion because you're underwater?

MARISHA: Yeah, just-- (laughter)

MATT: Not for you, it's not slow motion. (laughter)

MATT: As the tentacle rears back after the curse takes hold, you grab it in this giant swoop, and end up careening around--

MARISHA: Can I do a little bicycle kick, pop pop?

MATT: One bicycle kick to its side.

TRAVIS: ♪ Bicycle ♪

ALL: ♪ Bicycle ♪

MARISHA: That one's cocked, but this first one is 24.

MATT: That hits.

MARISHA: Stunning Strike. God damn, that is shit dice rolls damage. Seven damage.

MATT: Seven damage. You take eight points of fire damage.

LAURA: Ugh.

MATT: Stunning Strike.

MARISHA: War of attrition right there.

MATT: It's going to go ahead and use another Resistance.

MARISHA: I have nothing to heal myself with.

TALIESIN: I mean, anything long-range--

MARISHA: He uses a Legendary Resistance?

LAURA: Yeah, he did.

TRAVIS: One. He used one this round.

LIAM: He used one, at the top.

MATT: Yes he is. Yeah.

MARISHA: Okay. Okay.

TRAVIS: He's using another one?

MATT: Yes, he is.

TRAVIS: Okay.

MARISHA: So he's used two total? Right? I think.

LAURA: Yeah. That we know of.

SAM: He's used two?

MARISHA: He has used two.

MATT: I've seen some games where they don't even mention if a Legendary Resistance is used. They just let you guys figure it out. But I don't know. It's fun to let you guys strategize around it, so.

TRAVIS: Yeah, because our strategy's paying off fucking well. (laughter)

TALIESIN: A bunch of squirrels running around.

MARISHA: 15?

MATT: 15 misses it.

LAURA: Did we get it?! Did we get it?!

MARISHA: 15 misses. What did he do last time? Okay. Yeah, you know what? Flurry of Blows. I'm going to do pop pop again.

MATT: Go for it.

MARISHA: Shit, shit, shit. Stop, D&D Beyond, stop--

SAM: Bob-ba-bob.

MARISHA: Bob.

TRAVIS: Ba-ba-bob.

MARISHA: So, while I'm there, I'm going to try and swing around for two more kicks to his little squirmy eyeballs. Okay, okay. 28 for the first one, and 19.

MATT: Both of those hit.

MARISHA: All right.

MATT: Go ahead and roll damage.

MARISHA: Yeah.

LAURA: Is he stunned already?

MATT: No.

MARISHA: 13 damage for the first one.

MATT: All right.

MARISHA: And 11 damage for the second.

MATT: Great.

MARISHA: So it's 24 total.

MATT: You also take 14 points of fire damage.

MARISHA: Okay.

LAURA: Woof.

MATT: So after you've impacted both the legs, you pull back and then, pop, pop! Hit him back inside the side of the chest. The whole side quivers, and you see coins being jingled loose. They begin to slowly fall and spin to the ground, and as you pull back, the knuckles are singed and burnt now. You can see there's a little bit of blood trails in the water as you pull back your fists. You're starting to bleed from the impact there.

LAURA: Oh no, Beau!

MARISHA: Oh, they're getting those bubbly blisters.

SAM: Ew.

MARISHA: You know where they bubble?

SAM: Uh-huh.

MARISHA: Ah!

MATT: Does that finish your turn, Beauregard?

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah. that does.

MATT: All right. Caleb, you're up.

LIAM: Oh, yeah. I'm going to swim 15 feet forward and try to poke my face through that platform.

MATT: Over here?

LIAM: Yeah, that little gap there.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: And extend my hand out, holding a cocoon in my hand, and I'm going to cast Polymorph on him, on Vokodo.

MATT: Okay, got it. That's a which save?

LIAM: That is a wisdom save.

MATT: Wisdom save.

SAM: And turn him into a dragon turtle.

MARISHA: (laughs)

MATT: That is a 23.

SAM: (groans)

LIAM: Big save.

MATT: Worth a try. So as you come through and release it, one of the eyes looks towards you, and as the spell impacts, you see its form quake for a second and then resist it.

TRAVIS: Lair.

MATT: However. Beauregard, I need you to make a wisdom save.

MARISHA: All right.

TRAVIS: C'mon, girl.

MARISHA: All right, all right, all right. Cocked.

LIAM: Lure her out.

MARISHA: But that first one that wasn't cocked was an 18 anyway, so 22.

MATT: 22, that does beat your DC.

SAM: What?

MATT: So as you cast Polymorph, the effect blasts off his hide, and then reforms towards Beauregard and Beauregard, you suddenly resist an effect that's maybe trying to change and alter your physical form.

SAM: Wait, you resisted it also?

TRAVIS: Is that something that can happen, that spell can ricochet off of a--?

MARISHA: With him? Is that with him?

LIAM: So she saved?

MARISHA: I saved.

LAURA: Oh, god.

MATT: And to that point, actually, just double-check.

MARISHA: This guy's got a lot of tricks up his sleeve, you guys.

MATT: I forgot it earlier. Caduceus, if you can go ahead and make a charisma save for me.

LIAM: It would've been really funny to see you turn into a giant crab, though.

MARISHA: (laughs) Yeah. Pop pop!

TALIESIN: 20.

MATT: 20? Yeah, you're fine. Cool. All right, Caleb. That's your movement, that's your action.

LIAM: Yeah, done.

MATT: You good? All right, Caleb's done.

SAM: That's tricky.

MATT: We are now back to the lair action.

TRAVIS: Redirecting?

LAURA: That's tricksy.

TALIESIN: Oh, it's reflective.

MATT: As a lair action, he gets a free Misty Step and is going to teleport 30 feet.

MARISHA: Wait, is he moving?

MATT: This way. As part of the lair action.

LIAM: Not a spell, it's a lair action, right?

TRAVIS: You got Sentry on his ass, right?

MATT: As a lair action, it gets to cast, so it is a spell.

LIAM: Gets to cast?

MARISHA: But it's him leaving my melee range. Do I still get to make an attack of opportunity?

MATT: It's a teleport, so no, you would not. He just disappears.

TRAVIS: That's right.

LIAM: I'm not going to.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: Not going to.

MATT: So with that, leaving Beauregard and Yasha behind... Oh, god.

ASHLEY: Beau!

MATT: And Beau falls over.

LAURA: Beau!

MARISHA: Slow-mo falling.

LAURA: "Oh, I can swim."

MARISHA: Yeah. (laughs)

MARISHA: Ah--! Oh, it's fine. It's fine.

MATT: Teleports 30 feet back as part of Misty Step. You watch as he vanishes, and then suddenly this tiny little sparkle of fire goes across the water.

LAURA: Ooh.

MATT: All of a sudden he apparates in place again. You watch all the water around him pull back and then immediately begin to shift. You can see the heat itself radiating is causing the visuals around him to warp. That's the lair action. Now it comes to Vilya's turn.

TRAVIS: Oh, fuck.

MATT: So Vilya--

SAM: She's a orca.

TRAVIS: Killer whale.

MATT: So she can do quite well over here.

ASHLEY: When is he up? When is Vokodo's turn?

LAURA: After Vilya.

SAM: Same time as Vilya.

TALIESIN: But still has to--

MATT: Range on Call Lightning is 120 feet, so she can do it from there. She's going to fly up a little higher, or swim up as an orca, so she has a visual, and is going to concentrate for a second. The head seems to dip down and the storm above goes (crackling, lightning striking) and strikes down next towards Vokodo, who fails his Dexterity saving throw.

SAM: Damn.

ASHLEY: (sighs)

LAURA: Yep.

SAM: How many dice is that?

MATT: 22, 25. So 25 points of lightning damage to Vokodo as the bolt strikes and hits him. That's going to finish her go there.

TRAVIS: No redirecting of that spell?

MATT: No.

SAM: Good to know.

LAURA: It's an attack spell. It's different.

TRAVIS: Oh, okay. [intense music]

SAM: (humming to music)

TRAVIS: I'm still trying to figure out what's happening.

MATT: I did forget one thing earlier, but it's my fault. So finishing Vilya's turn, it's now Vokodo's turn. The entire chamber has now become super heated. Every one of you within the chamber takes three points of fire damage.

SAM: Come on, Vokodo.

TRAVIS: Sam, shut up.

SAM: You got to do better than that, Vokodo!

LAURA: Don't!

TALIESIN: No. We don't agree with that.

ASHLEY: Don't listen to him.

TRAVIS: He doesn't speak for us. We want you to die, but--

MATT: At which point, while he's there, he tumbles to the ground, the successful Command causing him to grovel. He swims to the base of the chamber, right there.

SAM: "You are super cool."

MATT: And it is currently prone.

SAM: Cool.

TRAVIS: Okay. So does that mean melee attacks on it have advantage?

MATT: Advantage, yes. That's going to go ahead and end his turn since it's all he can do.

LAURA: Did the attacking Yasha break the charm on her, because she took physical damage?

MATT: Ah, yes, go ahead and make another save.

LAURA: But wouldn't it break it already?

MATT: Doesn't break it. She gets to save.

LIAM: She gets a save because of it.

LAURA: Okay.

ASHLEY: Come on. Big money.

TRAVIS: You get a wisdom save with advantage, right?

ASHLEY: Say again?

LIAM: Wisdom advantage, yeah.

ASHLEY: Goddamn it.

MATT: No?

ASHLEY: 12.

MATT: 12, no. You're still there staring forward towards it.

ASHLEY: How fun.

MATT: That ends Vokodo's turn, currently prone on the ground, Commanded by a level one spell.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

MATT: Ending that go, Yasha, it's your turn, and you spend your turn dashing as close as you can, right there, staring once more into the dead lights of Vokodo, as Marisha put it. Absorbed by what's in front of you, eyes wide, hypnotized.

ASHLEY: Try again, though.

MATT: At the end of your turn, you can make another series of saves.

TRAVIS, ASHLEY, and MARISHA: Come on.

MARISHA: With advantage.

ASHLEY: Gosh dang it!

TRAVIS: Come on, here we go. This is it.

MARISHA: This is the one.

ASHLEY: No, it's not! It's a five.

MARISHA: What?

SAM: (laughs)

ASHLEY: Ugh, that was advantage!

MATT: All right, that brings us to Jester, with Veth on deck.

SAM: Oh, I got to come up with something.

ASHLEY: I'm rolling bad.

LAURA: Okay.

LAURA: I'm going to have my duplicate swim towards him.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: How close can she get?

MATT: She can, because she's not altered by the speed of the water, she can get almost 10 feet away.

LIAM: (as Jester) Diplomatic immunity.

MATT: (counting) Yeah, so 30 feet. It's still five feet away.

TRAVIS: Where's Yasha?

LAURA: I'm scared of casting any spells. I'm afraid it's going to--

LIAM: Right?

LAURA: I'm going to try to cast-- Fuck!

TRAVIS: I don't know that spell.

LAURA: (laughs)

MATT: I think you do.

TRAVIS: Matt, can you point to where Yasha is?

SAM: Fuck him!

MATT: Right there.

TRAVIS: Got it.

MATT: Right in the front of the face, just staring into the open mouth.

LIAM: (growling)

LAURA: I'm going to cast Command again.

MATT: Cast Command again? Okay. What's the save on that? That's wisdom?

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: That is going to be a 19.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: Yeah. That succeeds. That's your action, and your bonus to move it, so you have your movement still if you want to move at all.

LAURA: Yeah, I'm going to swim around-- (babbling) the base of where Fjord is.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: I'm going to swim as far around it as I can.

MATT: That's as far as you can get, unless you want to go up or down.

LAURA: I'm going to stay up so I can see him just above the edge of that-- Yeah, I can't.

MATT: That's all good. I'll put you--

LAURA: I think he won't get over there.

MATT: Put you right there.

LAURA: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

MATT: So you're just peeking over the edge. You've got it. All right, that finishes Jester's go. Veth, you're up. Caduceus, you're on deck.

SAM: What do I do? Oh, what do I do? I got to get within 30 feet, but he's moved 30 feet away, and I can only swim 15 feet, right?

MATT: Correct.

LAURA: Did I need to make a wisdom save or something to make sure it didn't do anything to somebody else? The Command spell?

MATT: No, you don't have to make a wisdom save. Beauregard does.

LIAM: Yeah.

MARISHA: What?

MATT: Make a wisdom save.

LIAM: You're getting a ricochet spell again.

MARISHA: Oh, shit, okay.

TALIESIN: With advantage.

MARISHA: Wisdom save?

MATT: Mm-hmm.

MARISHA: 13 plus four.

LAURA: 17?

MARISHA: Is 17.

LAURA: So you succeed, 17.

MARISHA: Okay, yeah.

MATT: Jester was about to shout a word, and for a second your concentration shifts towards her, and you shake it from your will.

MARISHA: Grovel? Really? You want me to grovel right now?

LAURA: No, no, I wasn't going to say grovel!

MARISHA: Oh. Okay.

MATT: All right. So, Veth?

LIAM: "Beg!"

SAM: I'm going to swim. I can't get within range, so I will-- Can I make it up to that thing that Fjord was behind before?

MATT: Up here?

SAM: That rock that-- yeah.

MATT: Right on top here, you mean?

SAM: Yeah, yeah. Can I get behind that?

MATT: You can get over here is about as far as you can get, which is partial cover.

SAM: Okay, that's fine. Can I hide behind something over there?

MATT: Yeah, you can try and hide there.

SAM: All right, I'll bonus action hide.

MATT: All righty.

SAM: And then I will--

MATT: Roll a stealth check.

SAM: Oh, yeah, I have to stealth. Stealth, stealth... 30.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: And then from my hidden position, I will cast a spell at it, using my Spell Sniper. Is that a thing? Not Spell Sniper. It's like-- I've never done this before. Magical Ambush! If I'm hidden when I cast a spell, the creature has disadvantage on saving throw.

TALIESIN: Ooh.

MATT: That's true.

MARISHA: Wow. Wow, you haven't ever done that.

MATT: Yeah.

ASHLEY: Disadvantage on saving throws for the rest of the--

SAM: No, just for this.

MATT: Just against that spell.

SAM: So I will cast Phantasmal Force on It,

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: Ooh, maybe he's extra-susceptible to it since all he does is communicate with mind images.

TALIESIN: Could be.

MATT: So what is the DC on that, and what kind of save is it? Is it wisdom?

SAM: Only 15.

MARISHA: Just flood the channels.

SAM: And it is Intelligence.

MATT: Intelligence. Okay. Okay, so rolled an 18, and the lower number, with its bonus, is a 14.

LAURA: (gasps)

SAM: So it failed.

MATT: It failed. So what's the effect?

SAM: Well, not much, because I'm just a little creepy thing. So it will see a giant black portal, 10 feet wide open up in front of it, accompanied by the sound of nightmarish howls from an Abyss-like plane, so it's like (warped growling) and it will hear, in Common, anyway, "I'm coming for you!"

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: Oh, god.

MATT: All right. Okay. Does it take any damage from this?

SAM: It could take-- It can take psychic damage, maybe?

MATT: I mean, does the spell do damage?

SAM: Oh, yeah, but it seems to-- It says if the effect seems like it would injure them, they can take a 1d6--

MATT: Right. So there's no damage yet.

SAM: No, it doesn't seem like it.

MATT: Okay, you got it. Okay, that finishes your go.

LIAM: You are not a little creepy thing--

ASHLEY: That's cool.

LAURA: That was cool!

LIAM: -- you are a strong halfling woman.

MATT: I will say... No, I mean, it failed the save, so it believes the scenario. So, you watch as it's on the ground, getting up from its groveling, in the process of getting up. It's angry, it's frustrated. It sees Yasha there, just grinning at that process, and now that it's moved away from the one that's pinning it down and everyone's hiding over there, you see the weird tongue on the inside of the mouth comes out and licks the front of its teeth looking at Yasha, and you can see the tongue itself is glowing this extremely bright, almost like orange-ish yellow hot poker iron type coloration as it pulls across the front. As it does, you can see bubbles rise as the water in its immediate vicinity flash vapors and bubbles up into the darkness above. Then suddenly it sees something out of the corner of its eyes. The eyes shoot there, and its entire body goes-- (snarling) and you can see fear on its face.

LAURA: Ooh!

SAM: Right, right.

MATT: Does it get to save every round?

SAM: I'll look.

MARISHA: Wow. Okay.

SAM: "While the target is affected by the spell..." Blah blah blah blah.

MATT: You're concentrating on that. Oh, we have concentration here as well. Okay. You got that? Veth, that's your turn. Caduceus, you're up. Fjord, you're on deck.

TALIESIN: How far forward would I have to walk to be within 30 feet of Yasha?

MATT: To be within 30 feet of Yasha from where you are, which is--

TALIESIN: I'm invisible right there.

MATT: Right there?

TALIESIN: Although I'd be visible now.

MATT: You would be. Put it right there. You would need to go your full movement, or close to it. 10 feet.

TALIESIN: Okay. I'll do-- I'm going to try and get as centered as I am to get everyone-- as many people, within a 30-foot radius, as possible.

MATT: That'd be right there.

TALIESIN: And do I get Beau in that?

MATT: Possibly.

TALIESIN: (groaning)

SAM: Matty, it says that it can use its action to investigate it.

MATT: Got it.

LIAM: Ash.

TALIESIN: Who's within range--? Just, I mean, it's one of those things where I'm... How many people do I think are in range?

MARISHA: (laughs)

MATT: You think everybody could possibly be in range, but you wouldn't know until you actually check.

TALIESIN: Okay, I'm going to cast then at...

LIAM: I'm just a Barbarian.

ASHLEY: With advantage.

MARISHA: Poor Barbarians getting mind controlled.

TALIESIN: Sorry, one second.

LIAM: I mean, Grog got mind controlled all the time.

MARISHA: All the time, yeah.

MATT: It's that low Wisdom, man.

MARISHA: It's true. (laughs)

ASHLEY: Yeah.

LIAM: "Must kill my friends."

MATT: What are you doing, Caduceus?

TALIESIN: I'm going to try and cast this on six people. I'm casting Bless on six people.

ASHLEY: Whoa.

MATT: Casting at what level?

TALIESIN: That would be level four.

MATT: Okay. So, 30 feet, Beauregard is definitely in that way. Yasha's definitely in there.

TALIESIN: Yeah, I was hoping to go one step diagonal or two step diagonal just to get a little closer to Beau and be not right behind phantom Jester.

MATT: One step back, okay.

TALIESIN: Yeah. I mean one step, that diagonal.

MATT: There?

TALIESIN: No, the other way. The other way. Yeah, there.

MATT: Okay. So moving there, you get everybody except for Jester.

TALIESIN: That's okay.

MATT: So, who are you choosing?

TALIESIN: Yeah. That's six. So one, two, three, four, five, six. So, everyone has a d4 added to saves and attacks.

ASHLEY: Yes.

MARISHA: Are we Blessed?

TALIESIN: Yep.

ASHLEY: Thank you.

SAM: Me too?

TALIESIN: Except Jester.

LAURA: That's okay.

TALIESIN: Yeah. It was either you... yeah.

MATT: And yourself?

TALIESIN: Yeah.

LIAM: At least she's Jester though.

TALIESIN: That's true.

TRAVIS: That's a d4 to Wisdom saving throws?

LAURA: I'm still smiling, even though I'm going to die.

MATT: Every saving throw, every attack. Right?

MARISHA: Attacks and saves.

TALIESIN: Attacks and saves have a d4.

MATT: Everybody is Blessed. You got it. That finish your turn, Caduceus?

TALIESIN: Yep, that's what I got.

MATT: Fjord, you're up.

TALIESIN: Don't like where I am, but what am I going to do?

TRAVIS: Okay. I'm going to float up from behind the platform, only so that my eyes crest the top so that I can see.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: And I am going to spot the portal that is being conjured by Nott.

MATT: You don't see a portal. You have no idea what's happening.

TRAVIS: Oh.

MATT: It isn't an illusion to everybody. It's a vision that he's having.

TRAVIS: Oh.

MATT: So you have no idea what Veth did.

TRAVIS: Can I track where his eyes are cowering from?

MATT: Make an Insight check.

TRAVIS: Okay.

ASHLEY: Come on.

TRAVIS: (groaning) Not great. Six.

MATT: No, you have no idea. You don't even know he's afraid. As far as you know--

SAM: Damn it!

MATT: -- it's just on the ground groveling and getting up, so.

LIAM: He could have pulled a barlgura through the illusion.

MARISHA: That's so fucking cool.

SAM: That's what we had texted about, but I guess I never in-game told him what I was doing. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Yeah. It was what I said I was going to do before the fight, though.

SAM: It is.

TALIESIN: Would you have done it anyway, is the question?

SAM: Fjord, I made an illusion like we discussed! (laughter) Like we texted about a minute ago.

LAURA: Here.

SAM: You can reply to this message. Okay. Uh--

TALIESIN: I don't even know.

TRAVIS: I don't want to be all meta about it.

MATT: What are you doing, Fjord?

TRAVIS: (inhales sharply)

LIAM: Put him in prison. Meta prison.

TALIESIN: I've been wondering why you haven't pulled anything out.

LAURA: Yeah, you were going to do it.

TRAVIS: Fuck it!

LAURA: Just do it. You just won't know where to do it from.

MARISHA: That's true.

TRAVIS: In this area, because it's the biggest open space, I'm going to use Major Image, and I'm going to conjure a 20-foot by 20-foot Astral dreadnought.

MARISHA: Yes!

TRAVIS: That looks like it's burning with the same sort of glowing fire that Vokodo has.

MATT: Whereabouts?

TRAVIS: Yeah, kind of over... Yeah, right about there.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: Maybe a little closer to where I actually am. Just so that it pushes him back towards you and away from most of us.

MATT: So, about there?

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MATT: Okay. Major Image, there we go.

TRAVIS: 120 feet range, 20 by 20 cube. It makes sounds, looks terrifying...

MATT: Totally.

LIAM: How-- for comparison, how big was the astral dreadnought that we went into the mouth of?

MATT: The astral dreadnought that you went in the mouth of?

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: Was between 20 and 25 feet wide on any side.

LIAM: Okay, great.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: So, much larger than him.

SAM: It's a juvenile.

TRAVIS: He's a runt.

MATT: Or a little bit larger than him.

MARISHA: Or, once again, just very far away.

SAM: That's right.

LIAM: Right.

SAM: (laughs)

MATT: Okay.

SAM: Water distorts...

MATT: You create that illusion.

MARISHA: The heat...

MATT: It's resting there. Is that your turn?

TRAVIS: Yeah, and it lets out a terrifying astral dreadnought bellow.

MATT: Which you've never heard.

TRAVIS: I've never heard.

MATT: So, what's it sound like?

TRAVIS: (inhales sharply) Just a cacophony of shit. (laughter) Just diarrhea-inducing sounds.

LIAM: ♪ MMMBop ♪

ALL: (singing "MMMBop")

TRAVIS: (screeching)

MATT: That induces diarrhea. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Yeah, just a thousand t-rexes pitched down a couple decibels.

MATT: You got it, okay.

LAURA: Ooh, that's nice.

MATT: All of you guys see this too, by the way. Suddenly, this smaller than usual astral dreadnought just emerges out of the shadows on the side and begins roaring. So, keep that in mind for whatever role playing purposes there might be.

LAURA: But said he was going to do it. So it shouldn't be completely...

MARISHA: We did have the talk.

TRAVIS: It's still pretty intense.

MATT: It's still intense. Just be aware. That's still a big thing.

LIAM: (pigeon coos)

MATT: Okay, that finishes Fjord's go. Top of the round. Beauregard, you're up.

MARISHA: (startling)

MATT: Caleb, you're on deck.

LIAM: Yeah.

MARISHA: Shit, ugh. Okay. I'm 30 feet away from it?

MATT: You are right now, yeah, 30 feet.

MARISHA: Not no mores.

MATT: (laughs)

SAM: Doggy paddle!

MARISHA: Doggy paddle.

MATT: Move forward.

MARISHA: I'm going to do a swan dive, going to go down, going to punch him in the face. (laughter)

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: I cast Punch Him in the Face.

MARISHA: (laughs)

TALIESIN: (blows raspberry)

MARISHA: I'm super flowery about punching.

LAURA: What about your lightning gloves?

MARISHA: It takes an action. Right? Does it take an action?

LAURA: I thought it was a free action.

MARISHA: (mumbling, reading)

LIAM: (drumming fingers)

MARISHA: Yeah, I guess it doesn't take an action, does it? So I can just do it.

LAURA: It's not taken an action before.

MARISHA: It doesn't specify that it takes an action.

MATT: Then it's a fault on my end. If it hasn't previously, we'll let it go for the purposes of this battle, but I should've said that.

MARISHA: (imitating lightning)

MATT: Okay. Fists go.

MARISHA: Thanks for the reminder. Would've been a waste of a turn.

MATT: I'll probably make it a bonus action going forward.

MARISHA: Okay. Oh, wait, I rolled! Oh, no, I rolled, and I just picked up the dice that I rolled! I'm rolling again.

TALIESIN: And you get a d4.

MARISHA: And I have a d4! Oh, the other rolls I did were way better. (laughter)

MATT: You have advantage, by the way, because he is prone.

MARISHA: Shh! Okay.

MATT: He hasn't had his turn yet.

MARISHA: Well, then, I will take that seven with that plus four, thanks Caduceus, to make it 21 total.

TRAVIS: He's fucking prone.

LAURA: He's what?

TRAVIS: Forgot he's prone.

MARISHA: 21, hits. Yeah?

MATT: Mm-hmm. SAM and

ASHLEY: What does that mean?

LAURA: Melee attacks get advantage.

TRAVIS: Advantage on melee. Double the chances for a nat.

ASHLEY: It's fine, I got this over here. I'm just hacking away at him over here. (laughter)

MARISHA: 10 damage.

TALIESIN: Just charging up over time.

MARISHA: Stunning Strike.

ASHLEY: Just waiting for my moment!

MATT: That is a 22.

MARISHA: He definitely saves from that.

MATT: Second attack?

MARISHA: Second attack. With the d4. 23?

MATT: 23 hits.

MARISHA: Uh-huh, 11 damage.

MATT: 11 points of damage.

MARISHA: Stunning Strike.

MATT: Stunning Strike again.

MARISHA: Burning through all my ki points.

MATT: So, that is going to be... 16?

MARISHA: My save is 16.

MATT: Saves.

MARISHA: Pop pop?

MATT: All right. Another Flurry of Blows? Go for it.

MARISHA: Yikes. God, I'm getting really low.

SAM: Low on punches?

MARISHA: Kis.

SAM: Oh.

MARISHA: Points.

SAM: Do you only have a certain number of punches every day?

MARISHA: I do, I have to ration out my punches. (laughter)

MARISHA: Those were both 16s, so 26 total. Plus the d4, so...

MATT: You rolling with advantage on each of those too?

MARISHA: Mm-hmm.

MATT: Yep. Those all hit.

MARISHA: 26 is technically 30 total.

MATT: You got it.

TRAVIS: Nice.

SAM: It's looking pretty rough, right? (laughter)

ASHLEY: How de doody do this? (laughter)

MARISHA: 14 damage, and for the second one... Sorry, it's a lot of dice.

TALIESIN: Kill him.

MARISHA: 23. 25 total to hit. It's another eight for another 14 points of damage.

MATT: Great, all right. As those blows are jamming into its side, you are just angrily... And you're hitting, you're doing some serious damage. You can see areas where the blackened rock exterior is cracking and some of the molten glow is getting brighter as you're actually damaging it and seeing it breaking away. You do suffer, ooh.

TALIESIN: Even though...? Oh, yeah, you are making contact.

MATT: 22 points of fire damage.

MARISHA: I'm starting to punch lava. It's starting to hurt real bad.

MATT: So take your 22 points of fire damage.

MARISHA: Beau's looking not gr-- she's looking a little charred, a little blistered in a lot of places. Definitely some third-degree burns in some areas.

MATT: Caleb, you're up.

LIAM: Caleb will swim around that column a bit to try to get as close as possible, and start weaving his hands in the water, and muttering arcane words and say, I have an offering for you! And I will pull out my middle finger and say you make a shitty god, you bedazzled cephalopod! And I will cast Banishment.

TRAVIS: Oh, yeah!

SAM: Yes!

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: Bravo!

SAM: Do this.

MARISHA: Come on.

ASHLEY: Let's go.

MATT: What save is that?

LIAM: Charisma.

MATT: Charisma.

MATT: 17.

LIAM: 17!

MATT: It's not his best save, but I rolled high on that.

LIAM: You rolled high. Fuck!

MATT: Beauregard, make a Charisma saving throw, plus a d4.

SAM: Oh, no!

LIAM: See you in hell, Beauregard.

MARISHA: (laughs) Fuck you, Caleb. Fuck you!

SAM: Oh, no!

ASHLEY: Wait, do I have to because I'm in the vicinity?

LIAM: No. He chooses.

MARISHA: He chooses?

ASHLEY: He chooses.

TALIESIN: Did you add your d4?

MARISHA: I'm about to. Mmkay.

LAURA: Uh-oh.

MARISHA: Mm-mmm.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

TRAVIS: Say it!

MARISHA: 14.

MATT: Where were you--? Okay, so--

LIAM: To his home turf.

MARISHA: (yelling)

MATT: Beauregard vanishes from the battlefield in a flash of arcane power. Beauregard, as you're right there, fists burning, you get this weird sensation, like this weird sparkling around your torso, and then suddenly darkness, and you are adrift on this endless sea of sparkling gossamer.

MARISHA: (incredulous laughing)

MATT: Stars and silver. All your friends are gone. The water's gone.

TRAVIS: Oh, shit!

MATT: You are just floating.

SAM: Can she breathe?

MATT: Yeah, you can breathe.

SAM: Oh, okay.

LIAM: Sure, it's--

TRAVIS: Well, that's convenient.

MATT: And as you go to inhale-- (coughs) you cough all the water out of your lungs, and you are alone. (laughter) It is cold and you are alone.

TRAVIS: Oh, boy.

LAURA: Is it dark?

MATT: It's dark beyond bits of weird silver scapes of cloud and sparkles from all around. You see distant little clusters of looks like floating rocks, slowly rotating.

TRAVIS: Cool, cool, cool.

MATT: All right

MARISHA: Am I dead?

MATT: Maybe.

LIAM: Question for the DM.

MATT: Yes.

LIAM: I remember-- I'm not using luck. I have Fortune's Favor. Luck used to be, you could make a target re-roll as well. Does that apply here?

MATT: No. Fortune's Favor is about your fortune. Not somebody else's.

LIAM: Got it.

TALIESIN: Fuck.

LIAM: All right, done. Byeee!

MARISHA: (laughs)

TRAVIS: Wild.

TALIESIN: It could get worse.

MATT: Lair actions now.

SAM: Lair actions.

MATT: The creature, now getting back up into its space.

LIAM: Don't worry, Beau, you're safe.

MATT: Freaked out by what's over in that area. It's going to go ahead and--

TRAVIS: You mean the giant portal or the giant mini dreadnought?

MATT: Both.

LAURA: (laughs)

MATT: But this is the lair action. In this space, it is going to... It wastes its lair action on your illusion.

SAM: Yes!

MATT: And the direction of your illusion and your illusion.

SAM: Yes!

MATT: So nobody is hypnotized--

TRAVIS: Hey!

LAURA: Hey!

TRAVIS: That's something! Oh, thank god.

ASHLEY: Wait, I was in that, but I'm already hypnotized.

MATT: You're already hypnotized.

ASHLEY: I can't be doubly hypnotized.

SAM: Does it discern anything about the illusions or anything?

MATT: It hasn't taken its turn yet. That was its lair action.

SAM: Got it.

TRAVIS: Think it has to touch it.

MATT: Now it is Vilya's turn. Vilya's going to go ahead and swim, over as this orca, over here to get a visual.

LAURA: Ooh, she almost knocked me over!

TRAVIS: I know.

MATT: And is going to-- (impact) bring the bolt down onto Vokodo.

LAURA: I like to picture the killer whale's little fin.

SAM: (laughs)

MATT: However, it does succeed on the save.

LIAM: (imitating killer whale) And completely misses it--

LAURA: (gasps)

MATT: -- as the bolt fires down instead, and strikes Fjord. I need you to make a Dexterity saving throw.

TRAVIS: Oh, shit.

LAURA: Oh, no, she rolled a one? How did that miss it?

MATT: He made his saving throw.

SAM: Thanks, Keyleth's mom. (laughter)

MARISHA: I was waiting for it, yeah! (laughter)

MARISHA: Apple doesn't fall far from the tree.

SAM: Way to go, Keyleth's mom.

TRAVIS: 17.

LIAM: Oh, man. A joke five years in the making. (laughter)

TRAVIS: That's-- d4 for Bless, right?

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: That's exactly her spell DC, so you take half damage.

TRAVIS: Okay, okay. 5d10, half of that?

TALIESIN: Do they both take half damage, or no?

MATT: He does not.

LIAM: ♪ Keyleth's mom don't got it going on ♪

LAURA: He doesn't take any damage from it?

MATT: Not if he makes the save on something for half.

TALIESIN: Fuck.

MATT: All right.

MARISHA: (laughs)

MATT: 28 points of lightning damage, reduced to 14. You take 14 points of lightning damage, Fjord.

TRAVIS: Wow.

MATT: And if I recall...

TRAVIS: That's serious. (intense, dark music)

MATT: Let's see. Each creature within five feet of that point. So, I need both Veth and Jester to also make Dexterity saving throws.

LAURA: Motherfuck.

SAM: Wait, what?

TRAVIS: It's electrifying!

SAM: I'm so far away from it.

LIAM: We can't let this NPC die.

LAURA: Oh, no, we're next to Fjord though.

MATT: You guys are both within five feet of Fjord, and it struck Fjord.

TRAVIS: Oh, man.

LIAM: We have to get her to--

TRAVIS: Home?

LIAM: -- Zephrah.

LAURA: 11.

LIAM: We have to.

SAM: 23.

LIAM: Must.

MATT: You succeed and take no damage because of your Evasion ability.

SAM: That's right.

MATT: You take the full brunt of it. Wait, how much did you take again? You took...

TRAVIS: I took 14.

MATT: 14. 28 points lightning damage to you, Jester.

SAM: (groans) Jester!

TRAVIS: Wow. It did more to her than me.

SAM: Wow!

MATT: Vilya, at this point, the orca goes-- (orca wailing) and gives this baleful sorry sound throughout the water that all of you hear.

SAM: Sorry.

LAURA: 28 points?

MATT: 28 points.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: Okay, that finishes her go. It is now Vokodo's turn. Vokodo is extremely scared of this thing. It's going to use its action to try-- It's going to try and move away from the illusion. It's going to use its action to try and discern whatever it is you're opening there.

SAM: It's another Intelligence check.

MATT: Weirdly, it seems more scared of what you're doing than what you created. So what is it?

SAM: You did good. Intelligence 15.

MATT: Intelligence 15. Oh, yeah. Yeah, that succeeds.

SAM: It's a battle of minds.

MATT: It is. As it looks towards it, you can see it's about to flee from that, and then the eyes look over in your direction, as you've exposed yourself, still after casting the spell behind the side, after you're fried by the lightning. Or actually, no, you managed to dodge it and put yourself out in the open, and it sees you, and you're like, "Ah, shit!" However, its eyes still looking at the illusion that you've created, too. It's like... And it's going to attempt to move back with its movement.

SAM: So now that it's discerned, my thing's dead, yeah?

MATT: Actually, make a concentration check for me. This might change things, because you're holding the spell.

SAM: I was, but I think once he discerns that it's false...

MATT: Right, but if you fail your concentration check, the spell would have faded before it came to his turn, so.

SAM: Oh, got it.

MATT: Make a constitution saving throw.

SAM: But I didn't get hit.

MATT: That's true. You took no damage. So, no. This works out fine. You're right, you're right. So, pulling back, he's going to go ahead and swim backward 50 feet.

TRAVIS: Five zero?

MATT: Yes. That'll put him back about there.

LIAM: Jeez.

SAM: Take your attack of opportunity, Yasha.

LIAM: Nope.

MATT: (sighs) (laughter)

MATT: That wasted his action.

TRAVIS: Yeah, yeah.

SAM: That's great.

MATT: So now as you watch, he's like-- octopus swimming backward as small coins and baubles are falling off of its body, its eyes wildly staring at the large astral dreadnought that's sitting there in front. So, your guys' teamwork fucked up his round.

SAM: Yeah.

MATT: That's going to finish his go. Oh, and everybody at the top of his turn, sorry--

SAM: Takes...

MATT: Takes four points of fire damage.

LAURA: Except for you, Beau!

MARISHA: I'm so lucky.

LIAM: Is that from the water heating up?

MATT: Yes.

LIAM: Yeah. Four points.

SAM: That's nothing!

LIAM: I can't wait for Beau's turn.

TRAVIS: No boiling water in the middle of fucking nowhere!

MATT: Yasha, it's your turn.

MARISHA: Water can't boil in space!

MATT: So you move--

TALIESIN: Advantage with the d4.

MATT: You move 20 more feet, because you can. That puts you right about there.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: Staring towards him. And you dash to get up there as well, so you are right up in his face.

ASHLEY: Can you use the d4 for--

TALIESIN: Yeah, every time.

ASHLEY: Okay. Okay. (sighs) 19.

MATT: 19 succeeds.

ASHLEY: Yeah! So at the end of your turn, as you rush up again, still staring at it, suddenly as you see its eyes distracted by this creature, the astral dreadnought screams, and you shake your head, the roar of the illusion piercing through your head for a second. You look and see it and for a moment, your heart drops. (gasps) Fjord had mentioned this earlier, and you feel, for a moment, foolish for the fact that you've been caught in this hypnosis by this creature. But that foolishness fades and goes immediate into this deep, deep anger.

MARISHA: Yes.

MATT: So that ends your turn.

TRAVIS: Let's go. Let's go!

MATT: Jester, you're up, and Veth, you're on deck.

TRAVIS: Let's go!

ASHLEY: Right in front of his mouth. I'm like-- oh. Wait, so I can't move from there, right?

MATT: Correct, that's the end of your turn.

ASHLEY: Got it, got it, got it. Okay.

TRAVIS: Have some dental work.

ASHLEY: That's okay, that's okay. Thank you for that.

LAURA: I'm going to take a cue from Caleb-- (claps) and I'm going to have my duplicate swim up.

MATT: All righty.

LAURA: And pull out a little duplicate sequinsed glove, and wave it around and be like, here's your other offering! (blows raspberry) And cast Banishment.

MATT: Through him?

LAURA: Through my duplicate, yeah.

MATT: Okay. And that is Charisma, right?

LIAM: Charisma, yeah. Come on, Jester.

MATT: That's a fail. He's going to use his last Legendary Resistance to resist it.

MARISHA: Last one.

TRAVIS: His last.

LIAM: All right.

MARISHA: It would've been funny if it was me and him hanging out in the Abyss, though. (laughs)

LAURA: Oops!

ASHLEY: He just bamfs right next to you.

MATT: However, Yasha, I need you to make a Charisma saving throw.

TRAVIS: Oh.

LAURA: Is it Yasha? He would choose Yasha? He wouldn't choose Veth or something, because...

MATT: Actually, you know what, you're right. Yasha, hang there. Instead...

LAURA: I don't know why I switched to Veth. I thought your Charisma was high but then I realized yours is also low.

SAM: Don't worry, I'll be fine.

MATT: Yasha hasn't been a huge threat at this point. He's not aware of that. Instead he's going to go ahead and Caduceus, make a Charisma saving throw.

TALIESIN: I haven't done shit. All right.

LIAM: Where is Cad on the board? I don't see him on there.

TALIESIN: Ooh. 16?

MATT: What's your spell DC?

LAURA: Uh-oh. (laughs)

MATT: (laughs)

TALIESIN: Oh, for Pete-- (laughter)

TALIESIN: Do I see you?

MARISHA: Does he see me?

MATT: Where were you sending?

LAURA: Same place.

MATT: Same place?

LIAM: Wow.

MATT: Roll a d20 for me, Caduceus.

MARISHA: Come on, come on!

MATT: If it's an 11--

TALIESIN: Nine.

MATT: Nine. So, no it is not the same place. 10 or higher, you were going to be in the same place. So, you suddenly go into a brief moment of darkness, find yourself now floating in the same gossamer space, seeing the distant sparkles and weird, distant winds that look almost like deep clouds in space with large shadowed land masses in the distance, and you hear a distant... Sounds like a whale. A very deep, resonant whale (whale bellowing) behind you. And you turn and look, and there is a shadow. You're not sure how far away, but it is getting slowly bigger.

SAM: Oh, Jesus.

ASHLEY: Uh-oh.

MATT: And bigger.

TRAVIS: Oh my god.

MARISHA: And I don't see him anywhere? We are not in the same--

MATT: No.

MARISHA: Fuck! That would've been fun at least.

TRAVIS: Just two bodies going-- (screaming)

MARISHA: We'll die together!

MATT: (laughs)

MATT: You guys are 700 light years away.

MARISHA: Yeah.

ASHLEY: Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

MATT: All right. Jester, that finish your turn?

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Okay. So you're not moving at all? You're staying put?

LAURA: I'm going to swim forward.

MATT: To there?

LAURA: Yeah. I'm going to get as close as I can, because everything's moving.

MATT: That'll put you there. All righty, finishing Jester's go. Veth, you're up. Caduceus, you're on deck. Wherever you are.

SAM: I guess I'll move 15 feet.

MATT: Okay. That'll put you about there.

SAM: Dash 15 feet. (laughing) I can't do anything from farther than 30, right?

MATT: That's as far as you can get.

SAM: And I will also use my action to go another 15 feet.

MATT: Okay. Put you about there.

SAM: Am I within range? No.

MATT: You don't know.

SAM: Well, that's it.

MATT: All right. Finishes Veth's turn. Caduceus, you are out in the middle of nowhere, with this strange, looming shadow coming towards you.

TALIESIN: Can I move? Am I on solid ground, or...?

MATT: No, you're just floating in space.

TALIESIN: Floating in space, and there's a weird shadow coming at me?

MATT: You have been in a similar space before in the Happy Fun Ball, and you do recall when you were there that you just willed yourself in a direction and you floated where you--

TALIESIN: I'm going to try and find some cover.

MATT: Okay. You look around. (laughter) There is a rocky mass. Once again, not sure how big it is, but it's slowly drifting, an upward angle. You start gliding towards it, and it gets ever so slightly bigger, and with the little bit of movement you go, "Ah, it's like a half-mile away." (laughter)

TALIESIN: Fuck, okay.

LIAM: It's that forced perspective again.

MARISHA: Yeah, it works great, I'm telling you.

LIAM: Is that Ian McKellen? I can't tell if it's six feet tall, or...

TRAVIS: 'Til you realize it's just a toe.

MARISHA: Ooh.

TALIESIN: There's no way I can just--

MARISHA: Didn't expect you here.

TALIESIN: Back to earth, is there? No.

MATT: You cast Banishment on yourself? Sure.

TALIESIN: Who knows where I'll show up, right?

MATT: Yeah.

TALIESIN: I can't pinpoint target where I'm going.

MATT: Correct.

MARISHA: He makes the hobbits look so--

LAURA: Sorry.

TALIESIN: Sounds like a terrible idea.

LIAM: If it was me, I'd stay.

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah.

TRAVIS: Burned the Resistance, though.

TALIESIN: I'm just going to--

SAM: That's his last, I think. Maybe.

TALIESIN: I'm going to--

LIAM: He said it was.

TALIESIN: I'm just going to hold a, uh-- Sacred Flame in case anything tries to do anything to me, but I'm going to try and just keep chill and quiet.

MATT: Okay. I'm checking one thing real fast.

TALIESIN: Mm-hmm.

TRAVIS: I love it.

TALIESIN: Actually, I'm just going to cast Resistance on myself and just try and chill.

TRAVIS: Resistance to...?

TALIESIN: Resistance is just--

TRAVIS: Space whale?

TALIESIN: It's just a bonus to a saving throw.

TRAVIS: Cool, cool.

TALIESIN: If I choose to take it.

TRAVIS: You're like that guy that got left behind by the scuba expedition. You're just floating in the sea.

MATT: I'll say for the purposes of this, you still maintain concentration, though you're on a different plane, because the spell is still being concentrated on. I'll say there is still that thread that connects there.

TALIESIN: Oh, then yeah, I'm not doing anything, then.

MATT: Right, right.

TALIESIN: I'm going to wait here and just keep my eyes open and hope that that thing is not coming towards me.

MATT: All right. You can hold an action if you want.

TALIESIN: I will hold a Sacred Flame just in case.

MATT: Sacred Flame, you got it. All right, finishing your go, Caduceus. Fjord, you're up.

LAURA: I cast a concentration spell through my duplicate, which is also concentration, so should we just say that she disappears?

MATT: Wait, what do you mean?

LAURA: I cast Banishment, which is a concentration spell, through my duplicate.

MATT: Oh, got you. So she vanishes.

LAURA: So either she vanishes, or the Banishment didn't take hold.

MATT: No, it super ends. So she vanishes, and the Banishment goes off. So, there you go. Good call, thank you for looking out on that.

SAM: Also, as I was swimming by, I act scared of Fjord's thing.

MATT: (laughs)

MATT and SAM: (screaming)

SAM: But I'm still swimming right by it.

MATT: You got it. (laughter) Okay. That finishes his go. Fjord, you're up. Beau, you're on deck.

TRAVIS: Do we want to drive it further away?

LAURA: No.

LIAM: No.

TRAVIS: Distance is a problem?

LAURA: No, distance sucks, man.

TRAVIS: Okay.

LIAM: Bring it in, if you can.

TRAVIS: I'm going to use my action to move astral dreadnought lite. It has a range of 120 feet, so it can go... Let's go bring it up this way, closer...

MATT: Okay. You will need to see where it's going, so you probably have to--

TRAVIS: Okay. I'll actually use all 35 of my feet to come around this side.

LIAM: You have 35 feet?

SAM: Yeah.

TRAVIS: 30. 30 feet.

SAM: He's a millipede.

LIAM: (babbling)

MATT: So, okay, with that, that'll put you up and over. It's 10 feet, 15, 20 feet. So that would get you right there.

TRAVIS: Okay, great.

TALIESIN: Won't it be funny if--

TRAVIS: Wonder if I should go wide, just around this side of it.

MATT: On that side? Okay. So that'll put you about--

TRAVIS: So I'm not--

MATT: -- there, we'll say.

TRAVIS: Cool, that's great. And then I'll move the bubble this way back to this side.

MATT: Back to here?

TRAVIS: Yeah. Try and herd him back towards the doggies.

MATT: So, the dreadnought (rushing water) whips around alongside the wall and is now almost floating a little higher, exactly where it is on this direction, and it's giving that same roar.

TRAVIS: And let's just say that he went above, so he's forcing him down towards the floor. There's no escape.

MATT: Right. Pushing it down? Okay. As it moves, the head shifts all the eyes, and you can see it's now already moving its physicality to try and prepare and react to its shifting.

TRAVIS: Okay. That is my ... turn.

MATT: So it's an action to make that shift.

TRAVIS: Yes.

MATT: You got it. Okay. Finishing Fjord's go. Beau, you are floating out in space.

MARISHA: Yeah. Do I see anything?

LIAM: Make the best of it.

MATT: Make a perception check.

MARISHA: Yeah, okay. 21.

MATT: 21?

MARISHA: For the Perception check.

MATT: Okay. Glancing around, (sighs) you don't see anything in your immediate visual sight, and as you glance down below, you can see some sort of a massive shape.

LAURA: Oh, god.

MATT: Once again, uncertain of the distance.

TALIESIN: Hey, you're on the other side.

MARISHA: Totally. You're above it, I guess.

TALIESIN: So far.

MARISHA: Yeah, but potentially miles. Yeah.

TALIESIN: Small dimension.

MARISHA: So small.

MATT: So, you notice that.

MARISHA: I can't do anything, can I?

LAURA: Can you hold actions?

MATT: Whatever you want to do. You can hold actions, if you want to.

LAURA: In case?

MARISHA: I will ... hold my action.

TRAVIS: Punch the giant floating thing.

MARISHA: Punch on arrival.

MATT: Okay, you got it.

SAM: Just parkour.

MATT: That finishes Beau's go. Caleb, you're up.

LIAM: Hold for Galactus. I am so far away from Vokodo that I am just going to try to get closer, and I am going to wave my hands in the air and cast Expeditious Retreat.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: So I can move a full 30 forward towards the cephalopod.

MATT: You got it. You can drop concentration on a spell whenever you want to on your turn, by the way.

LIAM: I know, but I'm also too far away to do anything of real use. I want to get closer to him, so that is what I want to do.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: But you can drop concentration, so that you can bring Beau back.

LIAM: Yes, of course. I want Beau to come back, so Beau, come back.

MATT: There you go, that's what I was asking.

SAM: (laughs)

MATT: ♪ Beau, come back. ♪

TRAVIS: ♪ Beau, come back! ♪

MATT: All right, and with that, Beauregard.

LIAM: Either way--

MATT: -- you reappear in the space where you are and as soon as you come back, (rushing) you give out two punches and there's nothing there. Immediately you look around and begin taking stock of how things have shifted, with Vokodo moving now further back. There's a massive astral dreadnought on the opposite side of the chamber that is roaring, and for a brief second once again, you have to take a moment to remind yourself, probably not real. Probably. So, Caleb. You're moving, Expeditious Retreat.

LIAM: Straight forward.

MATT: 30.

LIAM: 30 feet I can do, if I use movement.

MATT: 30.

LIAM: And my action.

MATT: Correct.

LIAM: Cast as a bonus.

MATT: You got it, there you go. So you're now 30 feet ahead, and there you are. Is that your turn?

LIAM: That's it. I got nothing else I can do at the moment.

MATT: All right. Top of the lair action round.

TRAVIS: Fuck me.

TALIESIN: Hey! (laughter)

TALIESIN: All right.

SAM: Marbles. (laughter)

TALIESIN: Cool. Cool, cool cool, cool.

MATT: He's going to go ahead, as part of this, the eyes shift and look towards Beauregard, who's appeared again.

SAM: Oh, no!

MATT: And you feel this strange sparkle sensation around you, (impact) as the Bless is dispelled.

SAM: Oh. Okay. Not so bad.

LIAM: Okay, not so bad.

LIAM: Just on everything.

TRAVIS: She can't talk. Where'd she go? (laughter)

MARISHA: I'm literally drawing pictures of a giant space whale with Beau just trapped in space.

LAURA: Oh, no!

MARISHA: My catharsis doodle right now.

LIAM: You just turned into a Pink Floyd album for six seconds.

MARISHA: (laughs) I did.

MATT: Vilya's going to go ahead and now swim forward 60 feet.

TRAVIS: Let's go!

LIAM: ♪ Wish you were here. ♪

MATT: 30.

MARISHA: (laughs)

MATT: She's going to be right about here.

MARISHA: I'm on fire.

TRAVIS: She's so close. That's, like, 15 feet out of melee?

MATT: Correct. Does not want causing lightning to hit anybody else, so is going to drop concentration spell and is going to use her action to move up, to swim up as an orca on the other side of Vokodo.

TRAVIS: Nice.

MATT: And try and pincer him there. Can't get an attack this round, but is at least just starting to close him into that space. Finishing Vilya's turn, it is now Vokodo's turn. Top of Vokodo's turn, everybody takes...

TRAVIS: Everybody takes!

MATT: Eight points of fire damage.

ASHLEY: ♪ Everybody take, everybody take. ♪

LIAM: No.

SAM and MARISHA: ♪ Everybody take, everybody take! ♪

TRAVIS: (grunting in rhythm)

LIAM: ♪ Everybody take, everybody take. ♪

SAM: ♪ Everybody take fire damage! ♪ (laughter)

TALIESIN: You know, it's kind of nice in another dimension right now. I'm feeling pretty chill.

TRAVIS: This is nice.

TALIESIN: This is fine. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Just floating.

LIAM: Eight total?

MATT: Eight total, yes.

LIAM: Thank you.

LAURA: Caduceus is so happy.

SAM: Do three weird people in two-dimensional glass...

TALIESIN: (imitates choral singing)

SAM: ...glass things just float by?

TALIESIN: Phantom Zone?

MATT: Vokodo, furiously now, at this point, surrounded, angrily is going to attempt to move this way to get out of the pincered scenario. So he's going to shift away from Vilya, which does get an attack of opportunity on him with the giant orca.

TALIESIN: When you get an attack of opportunity, shit's fucked.

LAURA: And Yasha gets to hit him!

ASHLEY: Do I get an Attack?

MATT: You do when we get to it.

TRAVIS: You are back.

LAURA: Yeah.

LIAM: She's conscious.

SAM: But you have willpower?

LIAM: Yeah, she's back.

SAM: Oh, wow.

MATT: So, Vilya's going to attack there with this, which is a plus six to hit. Misses, unfortunately. Yasha, however, as Vokodo shifts around this way and attempts to move out of that space this way, go ahead and make an attack of opportunity.

ASHLEY: Wait! I don't have a--

LAURA: Add a d4, add a d4! (intense music)

SAM: (humming to music)

LIAM: Man, wouldn't it be great if Dieter were here?

LAURA: (laughs)

SAM: What if he shows up right now?

LAURA: That'd be so great.

ASHLEY: 12.

MARISHA: "I changed my mind!"

MATT: 12 misses. He is forced to the ground, however. Is not floating, not swimming above, but is now, because of the astral dreadnought, pushed away, and is going to go ahead and shift angrily this way.

TRAVIS: You're not raging or anything yet?

TALIESIN: Not yet.

ASHLEY: No.

SAM: No, Travis! No.

MATT: Moving away from that, furious as the swings move behind. Sees you, as the arcane caster, Caleb--

LIAM: Oh, yeah, good. Very good.

MATT: -- and angrily is going to go ahead and focus. Mouth opens up, and you see the glow of heat on the inside begin to glow bright, bright, bright. Then you see (crackling). It looks similar to the energy that swirls around Yasha when she was playing her harp, or similar to the bolts of lightning that were being drawn from the storm above. It's now starting to dissipate above the chamber. But it's red. Whenever you see those images of tornadoes or volcanoes with the red lightning storms around it, this charges up (crackling, bursting) and fires out towards you.

LIAM: Is this a casting? Counterspell.

MATT: Counterspell, all right.

LAURA: (groaning) Go ahead and roll to counter it.

SAM and LIAM: (exaggerated German accent) Counterspell.

MATT: So, roll a d20, add your Intelligence modifier.

SAM: Counterspell.

LIAM: Add my Intelligence modifier?

MATT: Yeah.

LIAM: Okay. It's 28.

SAM: Ooh!

MATT: Not your saving throw. Your Intelligence modifier.

LIAM: Oh, my modifier? Then it's a 23.

SAM: Ooh!

MATT: 23. Fucking Counterspell, man. (laughter and cheering)

ASHLEY: Yes!

SAM: What was that going to be?

TRAVIS: Fuck.

MATT: You'll never know.

TRAVIS: Red Lightning of Pain and Misery.

LIAM: Would've been my total hit points.

TRAVIS: Yeah, could've been.

MATT: Okay, that's going to finish Vokodo's turn. (laughter)

TRAVIS: We love you, Matt. This is amazing.

TALIESIN: Still dying, man. Still dying.

MATT: Yasha, you're up.

SAM: You're the DM!

LAURA: Yasha!

SAM: You can just say there's no more Counterspelling.

MATT: No!

LIAM: Just nix it.

MATT: No, Counterspell's great. It's going to be really great when other mages start fighting you guys, because then I can just counter all your shit.

LIAM: Not going to happen this story.

MATT: No, not at all. There's no other mages possibly in the narrative.

TRAVIS: Nope!

MATT: Yasha.

ASHLEY: For starters, I would like to rage!

ALL: Yeah!

SAM: About time.

ASHLEY: Okay.

SAM: Let's do this.

ASHLEY: All right.

LAURA: (laughs)

ASHLEY: Fucking piece of shit!

MATT: Are you moving towards him?

ASHLEY: Yes, I'm going to move towards him. (laughter)

MATT: 5, 10, 15, 20. You swim up just enough to get into combat. So first, are you doing reckless or--?

ASHLEY: Wait, did I just roll one? No, because rage-- yes, yes. Yeah, I'm going to do reckless. I'm going to do reckless. That's worse. Okay.

ASHLEY: (stammering) What was the initial? I'm so sorry.

MATT: It's okay.

TALIESIN: Welcome back.

MATT: And Jester, you're next.

LAURA: Oh.

ASHLEY: 15 for the first hit.

TRAVIS: And a d4 for Bless?

ASHLEY: That's with the d4.

TALIESIN: Is that with the d4? Fuck.

MATT: You swing wide. As you're catching up, you thought you were closer and you miss it by inches. Using the momentum as you back-swing, you can go in for another strike upward.

ASHLEY: Natural one.

MATT: (sighing)

TRAVIS: Wow.

MATT: Wait, natural one on both die?

ASHLEY: Oh, no, no, no. I didn't roll twice. I rolled two natural ones.

MARISHA: No way!

MATT: Ashley!

TRAVIS: What is going on?

ASHLEY: I don't know what's happening.

TALIESIN: All of those dice are gone forever now. You got to--

ASHLEY: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

LAURA: I don't know how to get it to you.

ASHLEY: No, no, no, it's okay. It's okay, it's okay.

MATT: Ashley!

LAURA: Here's my whole bag.

MATT: All right. You were already raging. Now you are fucking furious!

MARISHA: Wow. That's rough.

MATT: All right, that finishes your turn, Yasha. Jester, you're up. Veth, you're on deck.

ASHLEY: Just Weakest Link me right now.

LIAM: Do you want me to send you to the Astral--?

TALIESIN: It's nice.

ASHLEY: No. (sighs)

SAM: You know why? It's because Yasha didn't sleep well last night, because of your dreams.

LAURA: I'm going to drop one Banishment. Wait, but I'm going to wait. Because I'm going to cast another Banishment, so it's going to cancel, probably.

MATT: Yeah, that'll happen.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Okay, cast another Banishment. That is a charisma, right?

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: As he's rushing away from the creature, and Yasha's missing, that large bolt of energy that strikes out and vanishes. Furiously, you can see its eyes are growing brighter and brighter with anger. It's still looking back with one eye at the astral dreadnought, and then (rushing) it vanishes from view.

TRAVIS: Where'd you send him? Where'd you send him? Where'd you send him?

LAURA: To the Astral Sea. To his home plane.

MATT: If they're from something else, it sends them back to their home plane, yeah.

TRAVIS: Which is--

LAURA: As long as I can keep the concentration up, he'll stay there.

TALIESIN: And then I bounce back?

MATT: And you bounce back.

TALIESIN: Ah!

SAM: My god, he turned into Caduceus! (laughter)

LAURA: Bless me!

SAM: Kill Caduceus!

SAM: Bless me! Do something so I don't drop my concentration!

MARISHA: We should get you out of here.

SAM: Oh, there's lair actions. Everyone get around Jester. Protect her!

MARISHA: We should get you out of here. Okay.

LIAM: Ja. Caleb swims in and starts looking for any kind of--

SAM: Can you just make a shield?

LIAM: Other than the boiling water.

LAURA: The water's hot! The water's hot! We should get out before I take damage!

MATT: So, Jester.

LAURA: What?

MATT: What else are you doing on your turn? Is that it?

LAURA: Oh. Um.

TALIESIN: Run?

MARISHA: Swim!

MATT: I'm going to turn around and start swimming to get out of here.

MATT: Okay. 5, 10, 15- (screen clattering)

MATT: Oh god!

ALL: Ah!

MATT: Oh god, oh no!

TRAVIS: (laughs) That scared the shit out of me! (laughter)

MATT: Good! That'll teach you to pay attention!

TRAVIS: Fuck me!

MATT: It happens on occasion.

TRAVIS: He's back!

MATT: All right, so that gets you--

ASHLEY: Will he be gone forever if you just--

LIAM: If she doesn't get fucked up.

ASHLEY: If you don't get fucked up.

LIAM: For a minute.

SAM: She's about to take heat damage.

ASHLEY: For a minute.

MATT: Yeah, so you get about there, Jester.

LAURA: But I took War Caster, so--

MATT: Okay, good.

LIAM: So chances are decent.

MARISHA: You just have to roll over damage, and the heat damage has been low.

MATT: Finishes your turn, Jester. Veth, you're up.

SAM: (exhales heavily) I'm going to swim down and hide in those rocks, and prepare and hold my shot until the thing comes back. Until the thing.

MATT: You're hiding in those rocks right there?

SAM: Yeah.

MATT: You got it.

SAM: Hiding and waiting, and if I see it, I fire.

MATT: You got it. Roll a stealth check.

SAM: 25.

MATT: Okay. Caduceus, you're up, and then it's Fjord.

TALIESIN: Okay. I'm going to--

LIAM: Where is Jester there?

MARISHA: She's over here by the--

SAM: At the door.

MARISHA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: She's at the door. I'm going to re-cast Bless.

MATT: Re-cast Bless?

TALIESIN: At level three. Who's within 30 feet of me?

MATT: Everybody except for Yasha.

TALIESIN: Okay.

MATT: So, Yasha's Bless goes away.

TALIESIN: Yeah. Let's see, I'm doing-- it's five targets? So one, two, three, four... I can't. Eenie meenie miney, five. We need those things to stay.

MARISHA: Not you.

MATT: So, who is it?

TALIESIN: Everybody but Sam.

MATT: At 3rd-level? You can get five people.

TALIESIN: Yeah. One, two, three, four, five.

MATT: So, Jester and Caleb?

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: Okay. So Veth loses it.

TALIESIN: Everybody but Yasha and Veth.

LIAM: That's a blessy Bless?

TALIESIN: It's an extra d4 on attacks and saves.

LIAM: Attacks and saves.

MATT: Okay, you got it.

TALIESIN: And I would've given you Freedom of Movement, but it was one or the other. And then I'm going to spend the rest of my turn moving in the direction of (whistles).

LIAM: Remember, it took 10 or 15 or 20 minutes to get through the tunnels to get here, so that's--

MATT: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

LIAM: Freedom of Movement.

MATT: That brings us to Fjord.

TRAVIS: Yes. We're running, right?

LAURA: I mean, I don't know.

TRAVIS: We're trying to get you out.

LAURA: I don't-- It's not like we--

LIAM: We need to last.

LAURA: We just need to last for a minute. If I can keep it up for a minute.

SAM: You've just got to get out of the lair.

LIAM: We will not get through those tunnels. Never mind.

TRAVIS: Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's true.

LIAM: (pigeon cooing)

TRAVIS: I am going to--

SAM: Underwater pigeon. (cooing)

MATT: You get the sense the tunnels, and the water you came from, is all similarly heated. So going isn't going to change anything.

TRAVIS: I'm going to move the astral dreadnought to the middle, above Yasha.

MATT: How long does that last for?

TRAVIS: 10 minutes.

MATT: 10 minutes, you got it, yeah.

TRAVIS: It's not real, Yasha! I'm going to swim over to where Jester is and just hover.

MATT: Okay. You've got it.

TRAVIS: I have 30 feet.

MATT: Okay. So you--

TRAVIS: I'll put myself, I guess, in front of her.

LAURA: Do you have ice armor?

MATT: Right here?

LAURA: Is your armor cold?

TRAVIS: Can I put that on somebody else?

MATT: No.

TRAVIS: I can't.

MATT: It's only on self for that.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MATT: All right. Beau, Caleb?

MARISHA: I'm going to swim opposite where Fjord just went, and also just try to be nearby to protect Jester.

MATT: Right here, you mean?

MARISHA: No, no, no, no.

MATT: Oh, over here?

MARISHA: Yeah. Team Protect Jester.

MATT: Yeah, you can get right here. Not an issue.

MARISHA: I don't know what I'd protect her from.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: But that's what I got. And I'll hold my action in case he comes back.

MATT: You got it. Veth, you're just staying hidden?

SAM: We're not leaving?

LAURA: No, stay hidden.

LIAM: I'm after Beau for initiative.

MATT: Yeah. Oh, that's right, sorry. I forgot right there.

LIAM: It's okay.

MATT: Sorry.

LIAM: Caleb swims directly towards Jester and pulls out his Transmuter Stone, and shoves it into her hand, the lucky stone with the band around it. It is set to adding proficiency to constitution saves right now. So you're going to add your proficiency to any concentration check you make to hold Banishment.

LAURA: Oh, great! Okay.

LIAM: As long as it's in a person's possession, they get that ability.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: Cool, cool.

LIAM: That's the end of my turn.

LAURA: That's great, okay.

MATT: All righty. So that brings us to everyone taking... seven points of fire damage.

SAM: Yikes.

MATT: So if everyone's holding, we'll come to Yasha in a second.

MATT: Go ahead and roll two d20s.

LAURA: Two? Okay.

MATT: Because you have War Caster.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: Because you have to maintain concentration every time you take fire damage.

LAURA: Right. Without a roll, it's already seven.

MATT: Correct. So you have to get above a 10, total.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: Or a 10 or above.

TRAVIS: And you get Bless and stuff, right?

LIAM: And you add your proficiency bonus too.

LAURA: Right, okay. Oh, way, way great.

MATT: Okay. So, that's the first round.

LAURA: 15 plus seven.

MATT: You're fine.

LAURA: Plus a four.

MATT: Okay. Yasha, what are you doing?

ASHLEY: (sighs) All right. I'm going to hang out here by this thing.

MATT: Okay, yeah. If we're all hanging here, we're going to do a bunch of rounds of fire damage and saves to see if we can make it. So that's nine we have left to do.

SAM: Nine rounds?

MATT: Ooh. Everyone takes eight points of fire damage.

SAM: Yikes.

LIAM: Wow.

MARISHA: If anyone wants to heal...

LAURA: Natural 20!

MATT: Great!

MARISHA: Did you say eight or nine damage?

MATT: Eight damage.

TRAVIS: I actually will--

LAURA: We should heal.

TRAVIS: I'm going to try and swim to the top of this cavern and just see what's up here, since we're doing it.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: Caduceus, can you heal people?

TALIESIN: Yeah. I was going to. I can do a--

TRAVIS: I'll do double dashes, so 60 feet each time.

MATT: We'll say you're up at the very, very top.

TRAVIS: Cool.

MATT: Vilya's going to move.

TRAVIS: Just to see if it's liquid all the way, or if it's air or--

TALIESIN: Yeah, I'm going to--

TRAVIS: Magic elevator.

MATT: No air.

TALIESIN: I'm going to use our six seconds to--

LIAM: Other spells that are not concentration.

LAURA: Okay.

TALIESIN: Yeah. So I'm going to use a round to do Mass Healing Word.

MATT: Okay. Go for it.

TALIESIN: Ooh. That's nine points healing to everybody.

TRAVIS: Nine points healing.

MATT: Everyone takes six points of fire damage. Go again, Jester.

LAURA: Great.

MATT: Okay. Wow, eight points of fire damage. Rolling really well on these.

TALIESIN: I'm doing another Mass Healing Word.

LAURA: Great.

MARISHA: Thank you.

LAURA: Wait, eight points on that one? Another Healing Word?

TRAVIS: Hold on, not yet.

TALIESIN: And that's going to be, again, that's nine points to everybody.

TRAVIS: Nine points of healing.

LIAM: We're Heroes' Feast. Do we get max healing every time?

MATT: No, it's not that. Five points of fire damage to everybody.

TRAVIS: Five points of fire.

MARISHA: How many is that? How many more do we have to do?

SAM: It's dice versus dice!

MARISHA: It really is.

LAURA: I'm great.

LIAM: That's kind of D&D.

MATT: Four points of fire damage to everybody. TRAVIS and

LIAM: Okay.

LAURA: (trilling)

TALIESIN: I'm going to do another Healing Word. Nine points of healing.

MARISHA: To everybody?

TALIESIN: Yep.

LIAM: Wow.

LAURA: Ooh!

SAM: What a rollercoaster.

MATT: Interesting point of order, just so you're aware, as you guys have a moment to think about it, and think about it--

TALIESIN: (counting)

MATT: One, he was looking pretty hurt. Like, just tipped over into hurt.

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: And if he stays, so does all that treasure.

LIAM: Yeah, no, no.

MATT: Just be aware.

TALIESIN: Yeah, I have to drop one person every round, so I won't do you, so it'll be negative nine...

LAURA: He was looking pretty hurt?

MATT: He was starting to look pretty hurt, yeah.

TALIESIN: Negative nine.

MARISHA: Starting to look pretty hurt.

TALIESIN: Nine, nine and--

MATT: Three points of fire damage to everybody.

TALIESIN: I'll take nine too.

MATT: Jester, go ahead and make your concentration check.

SAM: Should we let him come back and just pile on? No.

LAURA: I mean, I guess everybody could get ready to attack him, and then the minute he comes in, we just unload everything.

TRAVIS: We could do that.

LIAM: As they shout to each other in the middle of--

SAM: Boiling water?

LIAM: A minute counting down.

LAURA: Yeah. What do you guys think?

MATT: You've got three more rounds to decide.

LAURA: We can gather around.

SAM: We're changing the plan mid-plan?

LAURA: If we're going to do it, we should do it.

MARISHA: For the fifth time.

SAM: (laughs)

LAURA: If we want the treasure.

MATT: Seven points of fire damage to everybody.

LAURA: It's up to you guys.

MARISHA: I just know it was a war of attrition. Beau's about to go down.

ASHLEY: Yeah, I mean, if I'm low--

SAM: The treasure could help a lot the people in the V.O. community!

MATT: Oh no, what'd you get?

LAURA: 10.

LIAM: It belongs to the people of the V.O. community.

MATT: 10? 10, you barely scoot by.

LAURA: I'd have to roll a one and a two in order to...

MATT: Yeah, I know. I know.

LAURA: I rolled a one and a three.

TALIESIN: I'm going to do a Mass Cure Wounds, just because we're here. It's the same thing with six, so I'm going to do--

LAURA: Should I drop it?

TALIESIN: One, two-- One, two, three, four, five. Yeah, I'm going to hit everyone but you at the moment.

SAM: That's fine.

LAURA: Mass Cure Wounds?

TALIESIN: Yeah, Mass Cure Wounds. So that's... Hold on.

TRAVIS: Who wants it to come back?

SAM: I do, but we have to get into position already.

LAURA: We literally have to swim around and get around to where we'd be able to hit it.

LIAM: What if we make a ring?

LAURA: Go around him, go around him, go around him!

ASHLEY: Make a ring, make a ring.

LIAM: He's not here.

LAURA: Make a ring about where he was.

ASHLEY: Can you bamf him in wherever you want?

LAURA: No, he's going to come back where he was. If we're going to do it, do it!

MATT: This is the last round to decide.

MARISHA: All right, fine, fine.

MATT: Or the fight's over, if you manage to not roll a one and a two. So your call.

LIAM: Yeah, he would stay, or... It's your call.

LAURA: No, it's not.

LIAM: Yeah, it is.

MARISHA: One is safe and one is risky.

LAURA: Treasure. Treasure?

TRAVIS: There's so much shit on his back. There's so much untold stuff.

MARISHA: Oh my god.

LIAM: Caleb wants that shit, but Caleb's not talking. He's just acting.

TRAVIS: Just Liam. (laughs) Come on!

LAURA: If we're going to do it, circle around him, because I'm not going to drop it if--

SAM: I'm already ready!

TALIESIN: All right, I'm ready.

MARISHA: I can circle.

LAURA: Can we get into a place? Everybody get in position around him?

MARISHA: Oh my god, this is the stupidest thing we have ever done.

SAM: I'm going to cast Brenatto's Voltaic Bolt.

MARISHA: I'm going to hold my attack, and attack as soon as I see him.

TALIESIN: I'm going to hit you with Holy Weapon.

MATT: Make a perception check, Beauregard, to know where he vanished.

ASHLEY: Can I try to go under where he would bamf so I'll be right under his belly?

MATT: He was on the ground at that point, because he was trying to get away from the astral dreadnought, but you're right by where he was, so he'll appear right next to you.

SAM: We just willingly took nine rounds of fire damage.

MARISHA: You're tapping me for Holy Weapon?

TALIESIN: Yep.

MARISHA: Okay. Wait, what does that do? An extra 2d8, right?

TALIESIN: It's... Extra 2d8.

MATT: All right, Bless goes away.

TALIESIN: Yep, dropping Bless.

MARISHA: Oh my god, this is stupid. Why did we do this?

LAURA: Because he did it! He did this to us! He did this!

TRAVIS: He appealed to our greed.

MARISHA: He totally did. He got in our fucking heads.

SAM: (laughs)

MARISHA: He appealed to our greed.

MATT: Hey, hey, I'm just saying. In that moment--

LAURA: Everybody get ready, and then I'm going to drop it, and everybody cast something, right?

MATT: All right, so who's moving from where they are?

LAURA: I'm going to try to be within 60 feet of where he went away.

LIAM: We're within order. We're not going to get to all attack him all together.

LAURA: No, we do.

MATT: If you all hold an action right as she releases it, you would all be able to. Everyone gets in.

TRAVIS: Like Ripley.

LIAM: All right.

MATT: You would have the opportunity to do that.

LIAM: Disintegrate, if that's what we're doing.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MATT: Okay. All right.

TRAVIS: Call it.

LAURA: Yes.

MATT: Vilya's going to come over here.

LAURA: He could deflect all of these at once.

LIAM: Disintegrate could go to you.

LAURA: But it's all happening at once, so...

TALIESIN: I'm going to be 30 feet away, give or take.

MATT: 30 feet away from him would be about...

TALIESIN: Yeah, a little out of the group. A little off from the group.

SAM: Is Yasha able to join us?

MATT: A little off from the group?

TALIESIN: Yeah.

ASHLEY: Does it matter at this point?

SAM: (laughs)

TRAVIS: Aw!

ASHLEY: I'm going to roll a one.

LAURA: You're going to get a natural 20 on this one, I can feel it.

ASHLEY: Let's do it.

MARISHA: I'm going to laugh when you get the How Do You Want to Do This.

ASHLEY: There's no-- we're all going at the same time.

LIAM: Even if you don't, we all eat shit.

LAURA: All right. Everybody's prepped?

ASHLEY: Yes.

LAURA: Drop it, and everybody hits at the same time.

MATT: Okay. So as you all prepare yourselves at the ready, in a very ballsy maneuver, Jester, at the last minute, releases Banishment. (magic pulsing) You watch as Vokodo immediately appears in the space where he vanished, with a look of absolute sheer fear and panic in his eyes. There is a screech you've never heard a creature make. He's been so guttural and frightening this entire time. Put Caduceus back on here. But the sound he makes when he arrives is this mournful, "No!" If this creature could shit its pants, it'd be shitting its pants right now. There is an absolute sense of desperate fear that's he's trying to swim away and is in the process of doing so as he arrives. All right, held actions. We'll go across the table here. Fjord, what are you doing?

TRAVIS: I'm using the Relentless Hex to bamf in to five feet with him, and I'm going to hit him twice with the Star Razor.

MATT: Go for it.

TRAVIS: 16 plus... That's a million. That's 29 to hit.

MATT: That hits.

TRAVIS: I'm going to dump a 5th-level Divine Smite into this. So that's eight, seven, that's 15 plus...

MARISHA: I can't believe we--

TRAVIS: 19 plus a d4.

MATT: It's really fascinating.

LIAM: Yeah.

MARISHA: We took damage for nine rounds.

LIAM: I used D&D Beyond to roll.

ASHLEY: To bring it back. (laughs)

SAM: Oh, interesting.

LIAM: Yeah.

TRAVIS: 22 plus 5d8, okay. Here we go. (counting)

LIAM: I've always wanted to kill Marisha's character. (laughter)

MARISHA: No, no, no! (disintegrating)

LIAM: It was a hidden desire from campaign one, and now it can come to fruition.

MARISHA: Keep your fetishes to yourself.

TRAVIS: That's 49 points of damage.

LIAM: Artagan. That's Artagan's fetish.

MARISHA: Yeah, that's true.

MATT: (exclaiming)

LIAM: Wait, how much was it?

TRAVIS: 49.

MATT: 49 points of damage. You take four points of fire damage as the fire blasts back against you.

TRAVIS: Awesome. Second one is a 22 to hit.

MATT: That hits.

ASHLEY: 22 points.

LIAM: Goddamn, that was the first hit?! Paladin. Multiclass. C'mon now.

MATT: Morkoth is nasty, man.

TRAVIS: Five, seven is 12, plus a 14--

LAURA: Kill him. Kill him. Kill him.

TRAVIS: Is 17 points of fucking crazy-ass rune sword damage.

MATT: Hell yeah. So (clashing) striking back, you can see you've carved this large chunk off the side of the body that shifts out, almost like a cake slice, and as it does, it exposes this raw interior magma. It screams, the pain is still there. It's so much damage, but it's still eyes are wild, and it's not even noticing your presence, it's so scared.

TRAVIS: And I probably take fire damage on that second hit.

MATT: You do. You take one point of fire damage.

TRAVIS: Awesome.

MATT: All righty. So Fjord was there. I'm going to go back to the-- We're just going to do this in initiative order as we go. Beau, you're up.

MARISHA: Oh, oh. Oh, jeez. Okay. Pop pop.

MATT: I figured as opposed to going around the table, I would just go ahead and go down initiative order.

MARISHA: That is 30 total-- sorry, 31 total to hit.

MATT: That hits.

LIAM: (Irish accent) 30 damage.

ALL: (in Irish accents) 30 damage.

LIAM: It's me, Beauregard O'Lionett.

MARISHA: 2d8 holy, right?

TALIESIN: Mm-hmm.

MARISHA: So I'm rolling 3d8 for this. Do I get-- Okay, okay, okay. Sorry. Okay. (exhales) 17 plus five is 22 damage. 17 plus five is 22 damage.

MATT: 22 points of damage, nice.

MARISHA: With some of that being holy.

MATT: It's not really anything to add, so it just goes--

SAM and MARISHA: (mumbles) I don't know.

MARISHA: And okay. 27 to hit.

MATT: That hits. You can roll damage for the next one.

MARISHA: (babbling) So nervous!

LAURA: We're all so nervous!

MARISHA: Ah, okay. 10, 15, 16, 17... Another 22 damage.

SAM: Jeez, Louise.

MATT and ASHLEY: Nice.

MATT: Can't believe you Counterspelled his Chain Lightning. I'm so angry.

SAM: Ooh, Chain Lightning!

TALIESIN: Fuck!

MATT: Nasty.

LAURA: Oh my god.

TRAVIS: and

ASHLEY: (lightning crackling)

MATT: 8d10 lightning damage to four targets.

MARISHA: And I can only do my held action, right?

MATT: That was your held action, so that's all you get.

MARISHA: That's what I get.

TRAVIS: ♪ You're welcome. ♪

MATT: All right. Now that brings us to Caleb.

LIAM: Yeah, Disintegrate. Dexterity save. I already rolled it using D&D Beyond, and it's a 72, unless you make your dex save.

MATT: (exhaling)

LIAM: (magic pulsing)

MATT: Does anybody in this party have over 72 hit points at the moment?

SAM: (gasping)

LIAM: Pass.

TRAVIS: Yes.

SAM: You don't know.

MATT: It's true, I don't know.

TALIESIN: No, you don't.

LIAM: (laughs)

TALIESIN: You know for some of us.

MATT: If this goes wrong, I already have my target.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: Dexterity, you said, right?

LIAM: Make it Jester.

TRAVIS: Come on, say it.

SAM: Natural 20.

MATT: I can't have anybody come over here to look at this.

TRAVIS: I can, I can--

LIAM: You got a 20?

LAURA: Oh, no, no, no!

MATT: I'll step away.

LIAM: Just tell us, we'll believe it!

TRAVIS: Is it that clear one?

MATT: No, it's the golden purple--

LAURA: Is it a 20 or is it a one?

TRAVIS: I see it.

LIAM: 20?

MARISHA: What is it? Is it bad?

LIAM: It's a 20. It's going to go to who he wants it to.

MATT: So, Caleb.

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: As you are preparing the spell, and you bring it back, you feel the arcane energy crackling in your fingers.

LIAM: Right. I break open a bag of dust, underwater--

MATT: Which floats for a second.

LIAM: -- press the lodestone through. I'm going to kill Vokodo, obviously. (magic pulsing)

MATT: And as you release the green ray, you watch as Vokodo, eyes wild, there's this shimmer as the kinetic, psychic energy around it that seems to be deflecting the spells pushes against and resists the spell and then fails. How do you want to do this? (exclaiming)

LIAM: You're fucked with my head!

MATT: Rolled a natural one.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

MATT: Fucking natural one.

LIAM: Rolled a-- what did you say?

MATT: A natural one.

LIAM: Whoa, a one, not a 20!

TRAVIS: I didn't want to say anything.

LAURA: I really, really thought it was going to kill one of us!

LIAM: The light that has been gleaming out of its mouth all this time, the beam of dark green energy leaves the palm of my hand like Spider-Man (web shooting) and goes straight through that light, pierces through, right through, and to stay thematically with our episode, goes in the mouth and out the butthole. (laughter) Straight through in a line.

MATT: All right.

LIAM: Thank you for whoever laughed. (laughter)

TALIESIN: From the ether.

TALIESIN: Fuck.

LAURA: That's not going to disintegrate all of his treasure, right?

SAM: Yes, it will.

LIAM: No, no, it's magic. Magic stuff does not disintegrate. (paper rustling)

TALIESIN: That would've been a lot.

LAURA: Is he looking to see if it disintegrates everything on him?

SAM: No, he's looking to see what the--

LIAM: The Deck of Many Things cards scatter in the water.

SAM: -- erupting volcano has already killed.

MATT: As the green ray fires through Vokodo's form, the wild panic somehow grows more desperate. At first it looks like it missed, or it did no serious damage. But you watch from the pinpoint hole that has been carved through the body, its interior begins to just disassociate into sludge around the outside of it. It's being cored from the center out. And as it's screaming, this wave of violent, psychic energy (energy blasting) bursts out through all of you. Your vision is suddenly not yours, as the psychic energy released pierces into your brain, and your mind is clouded with a flash of vision after vision after vision after vision after vision. The scream that hurts, your ears are bleeding, your eyes are bleeding and clouding in the water, but you don't even notice, because you're just seeing in your mind's eye a gossamer sky of purples and blacks and greens and blues, the Astral Sea itself, clouded with distant shattering pieces. An endless sea of stars and possibility. Flashes of something in shadow, large, ominous, monolithic. A city. A city that is moving under its own power. Hunting. Moving with will. Following. You feel the fear of Vokodo. You feel it trying to escape. You feel this city hungry and chasing. You flash into the streets of the city. You see paved roads. You see buildings and towers. And they flick and bend, organically, shift like they're alive. Roads pulse. This is weirdly familiar, but so alien. Thousands of minds within are the city. It doesn't make sense. Hungry, seeking. There's another flash. Within the minds of Eyes of Nine, flash back, the vessel, the city draws close. Fear. Flee. Break through. Break and drag. Obfuscate. With its last power, you feel Vokodo attempt to flee and break through the barriers, dragging with it the pieces to flee from whatever this thing, this entity, this form, was. And right as those memories flash, the screaming subsides, and your vision begins to come back to as the rest of the body of Vokodo just drifts into floating sludge and waterlogged ash. The rest of the remnants of its gold, treasure, falling and clattering to the floor of the chamber. For a moment, you all look around and now notice the blood that now sits floating from every facial orifice, and the look in each other's eyes, you get the sense that you all just experienced the same, or something very similar. And that's where we're going to end tonight's episode. (groaning)

SAM: What the fuck was that?

TRAVIS: Hey, great call bringing him back.

LAURA: We didn't even freaking die!

TRAVIS: Great call bringing him back!

SAM: We did everything right. We did it all perfectly!

TRAVIS: Just like we planned it.

SAM: Oh, guys.

TALIESIN: A well-oiled copy of Mousetrap.

LIAM: (like Stefon from SNL) This battle had everything. It had boiling water. It had ricocheting spells.

TRAVIS: What the fuck? Did the city...

LAURA: Oh, I want to know about that city.

TALIESIN: Is it anything I saw in my vision, or no?

MATT: No.

TRAVIS: Was it like the Chained Oblivion?

SAM: Wow.

MATT: It was weird. It was very weird. Very alien, very nightmare-like.

TRAVIS: Moving. Not static, moving.

MATT: Static and then moving. And static.

LAURA: Like the Ring girl?

MATT: Kind of.

TRAVIS: Shut--! No, there's no association that he gave to that!

MATT: It would seem rigid, and then it would tense, like muscles, and then become suddenly curved and organic, and then shift back.

LAURA: We know the city.

TALIESIN: It's going to be totally driving you mad, isn't it?

TALIESIN: Right now, chat is freaking the fuck out.

MATT: So, sorry for the long episode, but we've been building up to this boss fight. We'll come back here next week and pick up from where we left off, this vision in the center of a boiling volcano interior.

LAURA: Oh god, that's right. The volcano's--

TRAVIS: It's erupting.

MATT: And hopefully--

LIAM: We don't have seven hours to pick through this treasure.

MATT: Yeah. Well, here's the thing. The fight's over. Water's still hot.

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: So we're going to pick up there next week. But thank you all so much for joining us. Don't forget, we love you very much, and is it Thursday yet? Good night.

TRAVIS: Oh, so good!