Level 17 Battle Royale

is the eleventh one-shot episode of Critical Role and the third "battle royale" episode.

Grog, Keyleth, Percy, Vex'ahlia, and Taryon fight one another in a battle to the death.

Announcements

 * Matt isn't sure how long the battle will last, so it's possible that there will be two battle royales. If so, alliances and betrayals from previous battles will be remembered.
 * The reward for this battle royale will be a "fate die". This is one added reroll for any roll in the game.

The Fight Begins
As they're all scattered on this strange battlefield, they wonder how they got there, Taryon in particular wondering why he feels more powerful than before. A cloaked figure suddenly drops from the sky, arms out. The hood blows back, revealing a handsome man with brown hair and a beard, announcing that they will all fight for his pleasure. He reveals himself as a forgotten deity, Colville. He lets them know that they have six seconds to prepare themselves, and then the fight will begin.

In preparation, Percy activates the Boots of Spider Climbing and charges his Diplomacy glove. He then climbs to the top of a nearby small bunker. The pillars begin giving off a hum and the towers begin spinning. Vex casts Pass Without a Trace on herself and Trinket; Trinket starts down the tower and Vex hides at the top of the tower. Grog rages, equips the Dwarven Thrower and climbs the tower that Tary and Doty are on. Keyleth runs to a pool, checks how deep it is, and casts Freedom of Movement on herself. Taryon instructs Doty to carry him and keep him away from all people. He then casts Sanctuary on Doty and uses a Bead of Force to enclose himself in a bubble, taking damage but keeping him safe for a minute.

As the fight officially begins, Percy takes one shot with Animus at Grog, misfires the second shot, and takes a final shot with Bad News, adding in magical energy to the shot using Cabal's Ruin. On the battlefield, the towers begin vibrating more, creating this intense force that seems to slow down Percy. Trinket emerges from the bottom of a tower as Vex shoots at Grog twice, both through the Blazing Bowstring.

Grog smashes his Titanstone Knuckles together to cast Enlarge on himself, goes into a frenzied rage, and attempts to shove Doty off the tower twice. He succeeds the second time and Doty slams into the ground below. Tary rolls off harmlessly into the pool, floating on top of the water in his ball. Keyleth rushes up and casts Flaming Sphere on the prone Doty. She then turns into fire elemental form. Taryon, still in the bubble, moves a little bit on the water using his Boots of Speed. Percy takes cover and fixes his gun as the towers emit electrical energy, hitting only Vex. Trinket rushes up to Tary and shoves him back into the center of the water.

Grog rage-tiptoes out of the bottom of the tower, prompting two arrow attacks to the face from Vex. Grog then runs out towards the tower Vex is in and lays down, prone. Keyleth runs up to Trinket and attacks him with her fire elemental form, setting the bear on fire. She then brings the Flaming Sphere down onto Doty again, completely destroying Doty and incinerating the book kept inside of him.

6 Left
Tary tears off his Patch of Healing Potions, giving him four healing potions as the rest of them realize they have no healing potions on their persons. Tary then rolls his ball onto the land as he takes one healing potion. Percy opens a chest and finds a Greater Potion of Healing as Trinket wades into the pool to put out the fire, hurting himself and revealing the pool to be full of acid.

Vex hops on her broom and flies down to Grog, offering him an alliance and reaching out her hand to shake on it. However, she has the Raven's Slumber necklace in her hand, and upon Grog not accepting her hand, touches him with the necklace anyways. Grog gets absorbed, where he begins to attack the room in the necklace with his Titanstone Knuckles. A black void appears in the room, and with one last hit with his siege expertise, Grog shatters the necklace from the inside and pops out in front of Vex again.

Keyleth engulfs Vex in her fire elemental form and attacks Grog, setting both of them on fire. She then backs up next to Trinket and moves her Flaming Sphere closer to everyone. Taryon, still in his ball, reads his Scroll of the Fire Shield to give him a warm shield and rolls further away, turning his rod into a crossbow. Percy casts Hex on Grog, misfires with Animus again, and picks up his Bad News to make a shot against Grog with it, piercing through to barely miss Vex. The pillars begin to vibrate again, pulling Trinket down and slowing him.

Vex puts the fire out and flies away on her broom. Grog ignores the fire burning him and dashes towards Percy, using the Boots of Feral Leaping to get right next to him. He then swings three times with his hammer, causing a massive amount of damage. Keyleth brings the Flaming Sphere over the pool to Trinket, slamming it into him and leaving him unconscious and still on fire. She then dashes into a building and slightly heals herself.

5 Left
Taryon gets on his broom, rolls out of sight of the others, and creates a small window out on the sphere using a window patch. Percy drinks his healing potion and, as a last ditch attempt, tries unsuccessfully to stun Grog with a shock from Diplomacy. Grog retaliates and Percy runs away up a tower with his boots. Vex then uses Hunter's Mark on Percy and shoots him with a bramble shot. He breaks free of the brambles; Vex compliments his strength before she fires another arrow, knocking Percy unconscious.

"Percy Fredrickstein de bah de blah, skittles and balls and ass. What happened?"

- Grog to Percival.

Grog rounds the corner and sees Percy unconscious on the ground, feigning concern before he starts to swing his hammer. He pauses, takes Percy's glasses, and slams the hammer down on his head, ending Percy's life. Grog, still on fire, briefly dons Percy's glasses and proceeds to leap towards a tower and run up it.

4 Left
Keyleth heals more and moves her sphere to the front of a tower doorway. Tary casts Invisibility on himself and flies out of the sphere, hiding from everyone. Vex flies from one tower to the opposite one on her broom, spotting Keyleth and shooting her twice, once with bramble shot. Grog runs out of the tower, over the dying body of Trinket, and enters a building with a chest in it. He opens the chest, revealing a Greater Healing Potion that is immediately consumed.

Keyleth reverts from her fire elemental form and spots Vex on the top of a tower. She then casts Fire Storm on Vex and the surrounding area, causing the tower to catch fire. Taryon, still invisible, drinks a Swift-Step Draught. Vex flies out and shoots Keyleth twice, dropping down onto the roof and hiding again. Grog jumps towards the tower where Vex is, crushing Doty's head as he lands and ducks into the building. Keyleth again casts Fire Storm through her Spire of Conflux, hitting both Vex on the roof and Grog inside the tower. Tary flies over Doty and tosses a Smoke Stick on his body, causing smoke to seemingly pour from Doty's unmoving husk. Vex heals herself and casts Hunter's Mark on Keyleth as Grog opens up a chest and drinks the potion within. Grog moves around the corner and sees the empty ball that Taryon was in, realizing that he's out.

Channeling thoughts of Umbrasyl, Keyleth uses Shapechange to transform into an adult black dragon. As a black dragon, she jumps into the pool of acid to hide, splashing some acid onto Trinket's body. Taryon lands near Doty's body and sees that he's irreparably broken. He then fires a Prismatic Spray of poison at Keyleth's dragon form, inadvertently also hitting and completely disintegrating Trinket's body. Tary becomes frightened of the dragon as he becomes visible again in the smoke cloud, casting Sanctuary on himself. Vex shoots Grog twice and flies up away from him. Grog leaps up onto the tower, climbs a turret, and throws the Dwarven Thrower at the flying Vex three times. Vex falls unconscious out of the air onto the roof where Grog is.

Keyleth flies out of the pool and spots Grog, trying to express her excitement at being a dragon to him, forgetting she's speaking in Draconic. She proceeds to release her acid breath at him, finally putting out the fire on him but leaving him barely standing. She then dives back into the acid. Tary again casts a poison Prismatic Spray spell at the dragon, moving back into the second floor of the tower.

Grog, as a last resort, pulls out the Deck of Many Things and pulls five cards. They are, in this order:


 * Ruin. Though he doesn't notice in the moment, all of Grog's nonmagical items and material wealth disappear.
 * Rogue. Again, no effect that Grog notices, but the card compels Wilhand to turn against and one day kill Grog.
 * Star. Grog's constitution increases, healing him up slightly.
 * Key. Grog gets a beautiful, rare magical greatsword, though he can't experience any of its magical effects as it requires attunement.
 * Knight. A goliath knight appears to serve and aid Grog in his fight.

Grog instructs his new ally to run up to the top of the tower, waving double birds and yelling "I am Grog!" As Grog descends the tower, he finds Taryon hiding, and Grog attempts to throw pieces of his own melted skin at him. Keyleth emerges from the acid to see the knight, rushing up to attack him with her teeth and claws. Taryon points a diamond at Grog, but proposes a truce in order to kill the dragon, feeding Grog a healing draught as part of their agreement.

The towers give off electrical energy, hurting Keyleth, the knight, and Vex's unconscious body. As Keyleth rears back from the lightning energy, she steps back and accidentally smashes Vex, killing her.

3 Left
Grog rushes up the tower and attacks Keyleth's dragon form, causing her to lose concentration on her Shapechange spell and revert back to normal form. Grog and the knight then attack Keyleth. Keyleth attempts for a moment to appeal to their friendship before grabbing Grog and trying to cast Plane Shift, to no success. Keyleth, panicking and still in front of both Grog and Wilfred, heals herself and jumps from the tower onto the roof of a nearby building using her mantle.

Taryon flies out and casts a cold Prismatic Spray on the four remaining people, freezing and instantly killing Wilfred. He again casts Sanctuary on himself and hovers in the air.

The tower emanates electrical energy again, hitting Grog as Grog uses his Boots of Feral Leaping to jump down on top of Keyleth, striking her down with his hammer. He then picks her unconscious body up by her antlers and hits her with his hammer, sending her body sailing through the air and into the acid pit, killing her.

2 Left
Grog looks up to Tary, admitting that Tary did save him, and asking him what he wants to do. In response, Tary cracks his knuckles and provokes Grog. Grog considers attacking Taryon, but decides against it in response to the Sanctuary spell's influence. Tary flies closer and throws a vial of acid at Grog and recasts Sanctuary on himself. Grog attempts three attacks, with the last one breaking through the Sanctuary. He then jumps off the roof and rushes into a small room.

Tary pulls another gem off of his Helm of Brilliance and casts Wall of Fire into the room, singeing Grog and again casting Sanctuary. Grog runs out and leaps towards Tary, climbing onto a different building and again only landing one throw with the hammer. Taryon moves over the acid pit once again casts a Prismatic Spray at Grog, poison type. Grog runs towards him to attack as Tary throws another vial of acid down at him, almost knocking Grog unconscious.

Taryon retreats away to a nearby tower, trying to get away from Grog. Grog leaps over the acid pit and starts dashing up the tower. Taryon casually starts walking down the tower, meeting Grog on the stairs. The goliath requests that Taryon hits him with his hands, no spells. Complying by transforming his rod into a flaming greatsword and swinging it around wildly, he hits Grog and once again nearly kills him. Grog persists and swipes at Tary's chest, right at the "TD" on his armor. The Shield of Fire still in effect on Tary freezes with cold magic. Tary taunts Grog as he kicks Grog down, shattering him across the ground and ending his life.

"Doty, take this down. I win."

- Taryon.

The Champion
The god, Colville, lands in front of Tary, the only contender left standing. He gifts the victor with "a seed of possibility", implanting it deep inside of Tary. Taryon suddenly wakes up in his bed, feeling less powerful, but seeing a white glow on his sternum, and feeling as if some of the dream still lingers.

Vox Machina

 * Taryon Darrington
 * Doty 2.0
 * Keyleth
 * Percival de Rolo
 * Grog Strongjaw
 * Pike Trickfoot (absent)
 * Trinket
 * Vax'ildan (absent)
 * Vex'ahlia

New

 * Wilfred (Grog's knight summoned by the Deck of Many Things)

Trivia

 * The deity of the arena with immaculate hair and a magnificent beard, is named for Matthew Colville - a DM, YouTuber, and eventual writer of Critical Role: Vox Machina Origins.
 * The weapon that Grog pulled from the Deck of Many Things was the Greatsword of Lifestealing.