Feral Business

is the fifty-second episode of the second campaign of Critical Role. The Mighty Nein enter Asarius, the City of Beasts, and encounter dangerous denizens within and below its streets...

Previously on Critical Role
''So, last we left off: The Mighty Nein, in search of Nott’s kidnapped husband had made their way east beneath the Marrow Valley, skirting the Underdark, under the Ashkeeper Peaks and have emerged into the ashen wastes of Xhorhas. You came in contact with one of the roving scout regiments of the Empire who were immediately assaulted by a roving crew of assassins and hunters made of gnolls and a Kryn warrior and some sort of a mage using a new form of magic you’ve never seen before. You engaged in the battle, and after some blows were tossed back and forth the enemies-- at least the ones with enough strength to survive the encounter-- fled when it seemed like it was not turning in their favor. Left behind, you got some materials from the survivors of the imperial scouting troop and made your way through the wastes eastward.''

''Along that way, you began to encounter some of the distant strange beasts that wander these lands. You endured the heavy rains and were suddenly hunted by a large, somewhat unwell, roc-- a massive bird that you thought was sweeping towards you, but instead seemed to be hunting a troop of bugbear hunters and you. Through some clever use of illusionary magic and some decent stealth rolls, you managed to avoid getting involved in that fray and instead came upon the mostly torn apart troop of bugbears with one survivor who had been playing possum. Noticing that he was still breathing, you decided to have a conversation where you came to an understanding which involved: we’re not going to kill you, give us some information, and maybe let me tattoo your body. Jester shaved a portion of his furry form and tattooed him with a classic Tusktooth special. You guys made it across the Ifolon River through some clever Moses-like parting of the waters... and some good rope work.''

''As the last evening began to come to a close, you could see the distant fire light of what you've now been informed to be Asarius, the City of Beasts, and the home to this bugbear Gluzo you had encountered. Camping up for the night, this far out of the vicinity, you found yourselves sleeping protected underneath Caleb's dome, your hut, and prepared yourself for a morning journey wherever you see fit. That's where we left off.''

Part I
The Mighty Nein wake up to a rainy morning just outside of Asarius. They discuss how best to disguise the humans, who would stand out in the City of Beasts, drawing unwanted attention. Jester takes Gluzzo aside and asks him about the light that he prays to, the Luxon, whose symbol is the dodecahedron. Gluzzo tells her that the Luxon is the first and original god of Exandria, and that if believers are pious and work hard, maybe someday they too will be reborn. The Nein speculate that their dodecahedron is some kind of holy relic involved with reincarnation.

As they approach the city, most of the party uses magic to disguise themselves. The city has a large military presence, incuding a colossal war tortoise and a pair of udaaks, but the Nein are not stopped at the gates and enter safely. The population is bugbears, ogres, orcs, gnolls, goblins, and the occasional bedraggled human, in a busy, commercial setting with a civilized sense of order. They also see one magnificent minotaur, later learned to be Sunbreaker Oloman, flanked by a guard of Kryn soldiers, and they decide to follow him at a distance. He heads toward the Aurora Hold in the center of the city, but then notices the party and asks them their business and who they serve, and when they say they are sellswords, he recommends they speak to Lady Zethris Olios in the Hold about work.

The party goes to the livery, meeting Zorth, an armless, ancient goblin, and asks about buying some moorbounders, the large cat-like creatures used as mounts. Zorth explains each moorbounder must bond to one individual and that he will train the Nein in their care and feeding. After significant haggling, they strike a deal for the purchase of three for 600 gp, a tiny dick statue, and the Nein investigating and taking care of the problem Zorth is having with something invading his underground moorbounder nests, and killing the baby moorbounders.

Zorth leads them under his livery down into the underground breeding areas to a barricaded chained door, which he unlocks for them, and leaves them to it. They try listening at the door, and hear skittering inside. Caleb sends in Frumpkin, who sees small bones, a cluster of crusty rats, and a large, muscular, almost feline creature suspended on the ceiling looking down. Caleb and Nott suggest they could possibly do Fireline (apparently one of their old routines), using Mage Hand to carry in oil, dripping it in a line and on the rats, and then set it alight.

Part II
Just as the Mage Hand starts pouring the oil in the two swarms of rats, they notice Nott and begin scattering, although the oil when ignited by Caleb's Firebolt does do some damage. The shoosuva jumps down from the ceiling and attacks, and is fairly quickly knocked unconscious by Beau. However, two more jump down from an upper platform and attack. Nott is badly wounded, poisoned and paralyzed by the stinger in the beast's tail, but Fjord gets to her and Thunder Steps her to Caduceus, who removes the paralysis.

One of the shoosuvas attacks Yasha, poisoning and paralyzing her, and the other follows up by hitting her again. Caleb successfully banishes one of them and Jester's lollipop takes out the other. The two rat swarms are dispatched by Beau, and by Caduceus's beetle swarm. Fjord finishes off the still-unconscious first shoosuva. They investigate the cavern, and find a faint red glowing crack in the air, and Jester uses Dispel Magic to seal the rift, and speculate that it went to the Abyss based on the creatures they just fought. They harvest one vial of the venom.

When they ascend back to Zorth's livery, they discover the trap door leading back up has been locked behind them, but Zorth quickly opens it when he verifies it's them. Zorth tells them they should let Lady Olios know about the rift, so they head back to the Aurora Hold. The team decides Nott and Jester should go in, because as a goblin and a tiefling, they don't need disguises.

The two are admitted into a luxurious apartment and into the presence of a beautiful dark elf woman, Lady Olios. She asks if they are seeking work, and they tell her about the abyssal rift that they found and closed. She gives them two possible jobs: Bring her the Empire spy working near the Four Corners, for 5000 gp if alive, 3000 if dead; or find the cause of several locals going mad and committing murders recently, which she suspects is demonic, for 10,000 gp. Alternatively, she offers favor to the Bright Queen. They decide to sleep camping outside the city for the night before deciding what to do first.

The Mighty Nein

 * Beauregard
 * Caduceus Clay
 * Fjord
 * Frumpkin
 * Jester Lavorre
 * Nott
 * Yasha Nydoorin [controlled by the DM and Travis]
 * Caleb Widogast

New

 * Sunbreaker Oloman
 * Zethris Olios
 * Zolth

Returning

 * Gluzzo
 * Nugget

Mentioned

 * Yeza Brenatto
 * Mollymauk Tealeaf

Quotations

 * Gluzzo (about the Luxon): "The Luxon, they say, is the first and the, uh, the original god of Exandria. And, uh, if we work hard together, and we...stay pious towards his Light, then maybe one day we too will be reborn."
 * Matthew (about Beau's new tiefling appearance): "You're...you're, you're a dude tiefling. Since Caleb's really only seen one dude's tiefling, uh...[players cracks up]...LONG may he reign, indeed!"
 * Beauregard (about her new tiefling anatomy): "Why is just my dick purple?"
 * Nott (to Sunbreaker Oloman): "Is there a Mrs. Sunbreaker?"
 * Nott (answering Fjord's question about why she is flirting with Sunbreaker Oloman): "He's. FUCKING. HOT! And, you know...50/50, my husband's dead, so..."
 * Zorth (welcoming the Mighty Nein to his shop): "How are ye? You've come to do business then, aye?!?"
 * Nott: (negotiating the price for the moorbounders) "Six hundred and a tiny dick." Zorth: "Sold!"
 * Fjord: "Bad doggy!" (to a shoosuva as he Thunder Steps away with Nott)
 * Jester (to Nugget): "NUGGET! Bite him!  ...Don't bite him, you're too sweet.  Don't bite anything.  Here, have some candy."
 * Jester (on how they have dealt with the rift and fiends they discovered): "Oh, we dealt with them. They are dead and gone and *clicks tongue* banished and also the rift. Is. Closed."
 * Nott (when asked by Lady Olios if it's just Nott and Jester): "We, we have some coworkers."
 * Lady Zethris Olios (as her growing impatience and hardness towards Nott and Jester subsides): "Well...we can use all the help we can get."