Transcript:The Tortoise and The Dare

List of Transcripts

Pre-Show
MATT: Hello, everyone, and welcome to tonight's episode of Critical Role, where a bunch of us nerdy-ass voice actors sit around and play Dungeons & Dragons.

ALL: (discordant shouting) (laughter)

MATT: Before we start tonight's game, we do have some announcements to get through. Beginning with our first of two sponsors tonight, D&D Beyond. Sam.

SAM: Guys you may have noticed that I haven't done a D&D Beyond ad in quite some time. Now, they haven't said anything about it, but I think it's because I'm on some sort of probation. Maybe it was all the Scottish accents, maybe it was the fart jokes, maybe there weren't enough fart jokes, I don't know. But clearly I'm on some sort of probation. So tonight, I'm going to do everything by the book. Nothing crass, nothing silly, just the advertising words as written. And to keep me on track, Ashley over here has volunteered. Ash?

ASHLEY: Yeah.

SAM: Do not let me stray from the script.

ASHLEY: No no no, I got you, you're good.

SAM: Okay this episode is sponsored by our friends D&D Beyond, and the new Tasha's Cauldron of Everything. The most ambitious, biggest expansion source book in years. You know what is funny, when I'm at home, my biggest expansion is something a little less literary--

ASHLEY: Sam, no, no, no!

SAM: Oh, thank you, thank you, Ashley, yes, you're right. Okay. Players can experiment with character builds by using 22 new subclasses. While DMs can liven up their campaigns with an expanded toolkit, puzzle guides, and unnatural environments like magic storms. You know what, magic storms sounds like a hip R&B album. ♪ Ooh, magic storms, keep you warm, oh good... ♪

ASHLEY: (clicks training clicker) Hey, no. (laughter) Shush! Sit down.

SAM: (dog whimpering)

ASHLEY: Good boy.

SAM: Okay. The digital collection on the D&D Beyond makes it easy to include Tasha's content in your character sheet and campaign, and master tier subscribers can share the book with everyone in their campaign for free, and speaking of free...

ASHLEY: Hey. (laughter)

SAM: Oh! Oh! (laughter)

ASHLEY: No! (laughter) No! (laughter) Off.

SAM: (growling bark) Okay, D&D Beyond is extending their pre-order perks to anyone who picks up a copy of Tasha's-- (laughter)

SAM: -- before Tuesday, November 24, 2020. And this includes 11 exclusive character sheet backdrops and frames plus a limited edition Cauldron Digital Dice Set.

ASHLEY: Don't do it. (laughter)

SAM: (shouting Irish accent) Top of the morning to...

ASHLEY: No! (laughter)

SAM: Okay, okay, okay, that's it.

ASHLEY: Bad dog!

SAM: Check it all out now-- (laughter) Check it all out now at bitly/CRTashas and thanks to them for continuing to support the show. (snarls, barks) (laughter) (clicker clicks)

MATT: Okay.

ASHLEY: It's so loud. (laughter)

MATT: All right, thank you, Sam, thank you, Ashley, and thank you, D&D Beyond. (laughter) Live recording, you never know.

TRAVIS: Good.

MATT: Yeah. So our second sponsor is Dungeon Craft. So for those who aren't familiar, our friends at Dungeon Craft sponsored tonight's episode for their Hell & High Water 2D terrain box.

LAURA: Did you say tooty?

MATT: Yep, 2D. Like "two dee," not "tooty." You can if you want to, I guess, don't let me...

TRAVIS: Hold your farts in?

MATT: Yeah, well, that, I don't want to limit your fun. But for any fantasy RPG, comes with hundreds of terrain pieces, all of which are double-sided with multiple different ways to utilize them, they're water resistant, for wet and dry writing and erasing and a one inch grid on it so each piece can slide into place on any map. So between the two books there are nearly 2000 pieces for you to utilize, all of which cover different locations, such as cities, wilderness, dungeon, hellscape, and seafaring terrain. They have a bunch of great Black Friday deals going on right now so check it out at bit.ly, that's bit.ly/1985games2. And if you use the code "criticalpin" when you check out, they'll throw in a free tape mimic pin with your order, so go check it out. This is really freaking awesome.

SAM: It looks cool.

MATT: I've been using tiles and stuff at home, but this is... If I had this back in the day,

SAM: Yeah.

MATT: I would have been so much happier.

TALIESIN: I think I have one of those pins.

MATT: Fantastic!

MARISHA: Is that the pin?

MATT: Oh, I have it.

MARISHA: I want a pin.

MATT: Here it is. There is the pin.

MARISHA: Are these the pins? (gasps)

MATT: We all got 'em!

LAURA: What? I don't have one!

MARISHA: These are so cool.

TALIESIN: Oh, you might. You have so much stuff on your desk.

MARISHA: It's true, it's hiding somewhere.

LAURA: I do.

LIAM: If only you had some merch.

LAURA: We'll get to it, we'll get to it.

MATT: Well, once again, Hell & High Water, awesome. Thank you, guys. Go check them out. Marisha, you have an announcement.

MARISHA: Yes.

SAM: Oh.

MARISHA: As a reminder, next Thursday Critical Role will be dark, as we are celebrating Thanksgiving here in the United States. That's November 26th. We will be back for episode 118 on Thursday, December 3rd. So we'll see you in December. Yeah. Last month of the year.

LAURA: That's crazy.

SAM: ♪ Wake me up ♪

MARISHA: ♪ When December comes ♪

SAM: Very good.

MATT: All right.

TRAVIS: Whoa, whoa.

SAM: Best radio ever. (laughter)

MATT: Also wanted to let you guys know that our Vox Machina: Origins library edition book from our friends at Dark Horse releases next Tuesday, November 4th. This is the mighty tome here.

TRAVIS: Whoa, what?

MATT: This is a sizeable tome.

LAURA: How come none of us have seen that?

TRAVIS: Why do you hide shit until the show starts?

MATT: Because that's what I'm supposed to do. (clamoring)

MATT: Look at that. It's a big old book, it's a big old book.

TALIESIN: No.

TRAVIS: Oh my god.

MATT: So this is all the collected issues of Vox Machina Origins series one and series two in one epic volume, with cover art by the amazing Hunter Severn Bonyun. I probably ruined that name, I'm really sorry if I did. The volume also contains never before seen art and sketches plus a forward written by Gail Simone herself. (cheers) Recently converted Critter, and person we are all big fans of for a very long time. You can check out the incredible creative team that put work into this collection through our article at critrole.com that showcases all the offerings with Dark Horse. And this will available in our US, UK, and Australian stores when it releases on Tuesday or you can pre-order it right now through your local comic and book retailers.

LAURA: Look at all them Grog-y abs.

MATT: I know.

LIAM: Yeah, yeah. (washboard sounds)

LIAM: Thick slab of comics.

TRAVIS: (as Grog) It's a low-carb diet. (laughter)

MATT: Laura, you got some things to talk about.

LAURA: Oh, I'm talking about it now?

MATT: Yeah.

TRAVIS: It's happening.

LAURA: Guess what we've got, you guys? We've got some merch up. I should tell you though, here's the thing, you guys know that we pre-record these episodes. So if I'm talking about an item, and it happens to be sold out, I apologize in advance. Because I'm really excited about this one.

LIAM: Oh!

TRAVIS: Oh, boy.

LAURA: Okay, so you probably can't tell just from this box what it is, but look at this fucking box, okay. I'm going to open it.

MARISHA: Give it, give it.

SAM: Whoa, the box is so cool.

LAURA: (happy yell)

MARISHA: Yeah, it's so cute.

LAURA: The box is so cool, but even cooler--

SAM: Plush.

LAURA: -- is this plushie-plushie--

TALIESIN: Oh my god.

ASHLEY: I'm going to be living in that.

LAURA: Hold on.

MATT: Same, same.

TRAVIS: Yeah, yeah.

LAURA: Gilmore's Glorious--

SAM: Does it have a hood?

MARISHA: Oh my god.

SAM: Does it have a hood?

LAURA: It has a hood!

SAM: (admiringly) Oh.

LAURA: It's so soft.

TRAVIS: It's real soft.

LAURA: I've had it at home for a long time, and I wear it all the time. And I'm sorry to all of you that I got the prototype--

MATT: You hoarding bitch.

LAURA: -- in advance.

MARISHA: I know! Jelly, Laura.

LAURA: It's so soft.

MARISHA: Share your prototypes.

LIAM: We just make pandemic wear now.

LAURA: Okay, can you hold this now? Because I've got other things to talk about, okay. There's not a lot of room here. But there's more to talk about, so there we go. Okay, also we have some holiday items showing up in the shop. So I'm going to talk about them. You may have noticed these popping up in some of the stores.

SAM: Oh, excuse me.

LAURA: I know. So they're our Critical Role ornaments. Oh, I'm fucking up the box.

TRAVIS: Oh, yeah.

LAURA: There's Vox Machina.

MATT: That's awesome. There's Mighty Nein and our logo.

TRAVIS: Are they metal?

LAURA: They're metal, they're great. Okay, so that's there. (laughter) Hold on, and then also we have wrapping paper designed by Grace Berríos. We have three different color combinations. We have purple--

TALIESIN: Wow.

LAURA: -- and yellow.

TRAVIS: Dude, it's so intricate...

LAURA: We have blue and goldies.

ASHLEY: It's so pretty in purple.

LAURA: And we also have extra fancy dark green and silver.

TRAVIS: It's got like metallic pearl.

LAURA: Yeah, and this one has like metallic stuff on it. So yeah, we have wrapping paper, but also what kind of wrapping paper isn't complete without washi tape to go with them? (laughter)

MATT: Oh my god.

ASHLEY: What!

SAM: What is that?

LAURA: It's washi tape.

SAM: What is wash--?

LAURA: It's fancy.

ASHLEY: I didn't know we were making washi tape.

LAURA: Right? So I'm a big fan of gift wrap, so this is why this is happening. But we have different color combinations of the tape, so it goes with the wrapping paper, so yeah.

TRAVIS: At our house gift-wrapping is real serious.

LAURA: I think they're in the stores now--

MATT: I can tell.

LAURA: -- if they're not, just keep an eye on them because they'll be popping up very soon, so yeah.

TRAVIS: I hand Laura a present during the holidays and she's like, "Nice sharp corners." (laughter)

TRAVIS: I'm like, all right. (laughter)

ASHLEY: Your gifts are always wrapped the best. You always have very intricate...

LAURA: There is an art to the sharp corners I'm not going to lie, yeah.

MATT: My wrapping job always looks like some sort of seaside deli. It's... (laughter) Here.

TALIESIN: I got you a sandwich.

MATT: Yeah, it's bad, it's bad.

MARISHA: I just do it, yeah.

SAM: You do bags?

MARISHA: No, I just do all the wrapping.

SAM: Oh, you do all the wrapping.

LAURA: That's everything I've got right now, I think.

TALIESIN: It's fresh because it's yesterday's newspaper.

MATT: Damn, Laura.

SAM: That's amazing stuff, Laura.

MATT: Yeah, you've been busy.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: I need that robe, I mean-- (as Gilmore) for obvious reasons. All right, so anyway, I believe that's the end of our announcements tonight. So let's go ahead and jump into tonight's episode of Critical Role.

(clamoring) (water bubbling) (thunder rumbling) (explosion) ♪ Role, Critical Role ♪ ♪ Role, Critical Role ♪ ♪ Role, Critical Role ♪ ♪ Role, Critical Role ♪ ♪ Role, Critical Role ♪ ♪ Role, Critical Role ♪ ♪ Roll the dice ♪ ♪ The adventure begins ♪ ♪ They were always beside you ♪ ♪ Your nerdy best friends ♪ ♪ And the DM to guide you ♪ ♪ And they rise from the flames for the battles ahead ♪ ♪ Villains beware because you're about to be dead ♪ ♪ They got magic and flair ♪ ♪ They got falchions and cunning ♪ ♪ They don't see over there ♪ ♪ There's a monster incoming ♪ ♪ Inspiration is waiting, rise up, don't think twice ♪ ♪ Put your fate in your hands, take a chance, ♪ ♪ roll the dice ♪ ♪ Roll the dice ♪ ♪ Critical Role (roll the dice) ♪ ♪ Critical Role (roll the dice) ♪ ♪ Ooh, ahh ♪ ♪ Can you answer the call ♪ ♪ Diggin' deep in your soul ♪ ♪ As the legend unfolds ♪ ♪ Now it's your turn (your turn, your turn) ♪ ♪ to roll ♪ (flames whooshing)

Part I
MATT: And welcome back. Before we begin, I must have said the date wrong, because my brain, November 24th, if I got it wrong, is when this comes out, so otherwise, we'd be going back in time. But yeah, so, correction, sorry. Set that there.

LAURA: Get it right, Matt.

MATT: I did!

ASHLEY: Boo!

MATT: All righty, so.

TRAVIS: We're good, we're good, we're good, we're good.

SAM: Oh shit.

TRAVIS: We're good, we're good.

MATT: Last we left off: The Mighty Nein, making their way to Eiselcross, lost their paid patron for this trip, Lady Vess DeRogna, as she was murdered, it seems, by Mollymauk, or whoever pilots the body. You've gathered the body of Vess, and made your way northward with your guide, Day-gen Underthorn, or Dagen Underthorn, or however pronunciation we've decided to do over the past few weeks, he--

TALIESIN: Purvon.

MATT: Right, Purvon. Is your guide northward. After coming across a number of dangerous and unique encounters in this southern region of Foren. You eventually found your way to A5, the first of your Aeorian ruin excavations. You delved into the subterranean tunnels beneath, you searched for signs of life, signs of recent movement, uncovered bodies, some older, some newer. A still spider creature that you avoided and sealed off, mostly. You fought frozen elementals in a chamber, and one of you, Veth, slid through the open doors upon completing the puzzle of which led to the next chamber, which was a 270-foot pit, and you plummeted, but caught yourself with some magical know how, and then were immediately attacked by some black puddings that drew your attention. The rest of you turned into, some of you turned into eagles, and others rode on them, and you fought them in a giant lightless tunnel... D&D! (laughter) After making you way to the base of that pit-- (offscreen sneeze)

MATT: Bless you.

LIAM: Gesund.

MATT: You discovered the hidden, mostly obscured entranceway to an elongated, still magically lit tunnel. At the end of it, an arcane doorway, and beyond that, a somewhat circular chamber, whereupon looking within, you discovered the tail end of a conflict, where it seems the Tomb Takers had just finished off the last of their victims. Of which Mollymauk, throwing the lifeless body of the individual he was previously clutching to the ground, turned with a smile and said, (Irish accent) "Oh, my apologies, you arrived early. I was hoping to tidy up a bit." So that's where we begin. As you see the Tomb Takers all begin to stand still out and about in the center, semi-circular lower region of this somewhat rounded chamber. Corpses strewn about in the space around them, pools of blood, the bright blue, vibrant light illuminating the entire chamber with this blue hue, this strange blue stone set into the ceiling as these carved sigils all drag their way across the floor with the back wall up into where this stone is currently affixed. You stand above where the doors open, and the upper tier balconies that eventually lead to stairs that curve downward, or a set of stairs that directly enters the chamber. What do you do?

TRAVIS: Quick description question. The jewel in the center of the room.

MATT: Yep.

TRAVIS: Again, how big is it?

MATT: It's roughly a foot and a half to two feet from side to side. So it's a sizeable stone.

TRAVIS: And it's in the ceiling?

MATT: It's in the ceiling.

TRAVIS: Okay.

LIAM: There's sigilwork all around the room, you said?

MATT: It's in the center of the chamber. There's scrolling all throughout, and there's bits of rock and rubble, and the room has seen better days, but it is fairly decently preserved in comparison to other chambers you've come across within these ruins. But the central symbols lie on the floor in the center of the chamber, and then continue on to the opposite side from where you're standing, up the wall, and then surround the stone above.

LIAM: And how far are we from our old friend?

MATT: At this moment, I'd say roughly 40, 45 feet.

LIAM: That's close.

MATT: It's not a massive chamber.

LAURA: What kind of clothes is Lucien wearing?

MATT: Right now, you can see, while they're in various different shades and stylings per se, they're all wearing their heavy winter furs and leathers and cloaks. He's wearing heavy leather pants with fur-trimmed boots. It looks like, beneath the coat, which is currently open now, he has a simple silk or white cloth shirt he has a simple silk or white cloth shirt beneath that billows a bit, you can see. It's not unlike something maybe you've seen Molly wear beneath his outfit.

LIAM: And when we were walking in, he was just finishing murdering a fool, right?

MATT: Correct. Now, you all, for the most part, are still in the hallway. It was Caleb who noticed this originally, as you were the last one to open the door, if I recall.

LIAM: Yeah, that's true.

LIAM: So you would've dumped...

LAURA: Moved the body.

LIAM: Yeah, I just used my foot to push Vess' body a little out of the way, pathetically. I hope we're not being too presumptuous to intrude.

MATT: "Well, I mean, we're not in the middle of anything right now, necessarily, so, please, come in."

LAURA: Are you going to attack us if we do?

LIAM: We're all friends here.

MATT: "Not unless you give us a reason to."

LAURA: I-I-Insight check?

MATT: Make an insight check.

TRAVIS: 45-foot insight check. (laughter)

LAURA: 17.

MATT: 17. This is a tense situation.

LAURA: Yeah!

MATT: And it could go either way.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: Who knows?

TRAVIS: Well, that's fair.

TALIESIN: I, for one, am embracing the awkward, so...

LIAM: This is a very tricky circumstance... you.

MATT: You see he's holding two different, unfamiliar scimitars in his hands as he picks them up off the ground. The one that he had dropped when he clutched the other person and wipes it on the edge of his cloak.

TRAVIS: Unfamiliar scimitars?

MATT: Correct.

TALIESIN: We haven't met.

MATT: "In fact, I think I've only met you. Well, sort of met, at a distance, at least. I'm a bit curious who you are."

LAURA: Right. I was wondering if you remembered.

MATT: "Well, I think..."

MARISHA: We're just a blast from your past, I guess.

MATT: Looks over towards Cree, and Cree is standing off to the side too, so. (as Cree) "Yeah, well, we all know each other."

MARISHA: Hey, Cree.

TALIESIN: Been a while.

MATT: "Indeed."

MARISHA: Good of you to be so forthcoming when we checked in, asked you some questions.

MATT: "Well, I was a bit preoccupied, as you can see. I've told you a little bit about these people." Molly turns and goes, "Right, right, no, you said there was a past, an encounter with something I wasn't quite present for, but nevertheless, for this time, let us meet for the first time. I am Lucien, the Nonagon."

LAURA: The Nonagon?

LIAM: So you really have no memory of any of us?

MATT: "Not particularly."

MARISHA: But you remember Cree, and the rest of the Tomb Takers from before?

MATT: "Well, we have quite a bit of history, eh? I assume that you're all referring to the... uninvited guest who took the reins for a bit."

TRAVIS: (laughs)

TALIESIN: For a bit.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MATT: "It was likely a fragment left behind. Try as she might, the soul was too strong for her to sunder and I was pieced back together. Such is the blessing of the true Nonagon."

TRAVIS: You keep saying Nonagon. What does that mean?

MATT: "That means many things."

TALIESIN: (negative) Mm-mm. Mm-mm.

TRAVIS: And "she," are you speaking about Lady DeRogna?

MATT: "She was... an ambitious woman, that reached beyond her means. She lacked the imagination to achieve the things that I am achieving."

TRAVIS: These--

LAURA: How long have you been the Nonagon?

MATT: "A number of years, maybe. Now, I've answered a few of your questions, I've got a few of my own. It's only fair, I assume. You all seem mighty curious, you in particular. Why is it you followed us?"

TRAVIS and TALIESIN: (laugh)

TRAVIS: Ooh, that is-- long.

TALIESIN: Oh wow.

MATT: He takes a small flask out of the inside of his cloak and unscrews it as he listens.

LIAM: Well, you've put us into a bit of an awkward situation. Your competitor-- Caleb looks over his shoulder-- she was our charge. She hired us to come here, and now we've found ourselves on our own, and she will be missed where she comes from.

MATT: "I'm sure she will, I'm sure she will, but, you know, as the adage goes, you play with fire, and I, on some scale, do feel sorry you got roped into that, but, well, I couldn't miss an opportunity. It seemed our paths were diverging to a point in an unexpected way and she's a figure of enough power that it's best to get the jump if you can."

LAURA: She was really powerful.

LIAM: And had many powerful friends who are going to want to know why she is no longer among the living.

MATT: "In time, I'm sure."

TRAVIS: You asked why we're following you. I'm sure your friend, Cree, has filled you in. We had quite the history with... you?

LAURA: With your fragment.

TRAVIS: Before this Lucien, it's more than a bit awkward. We had very fond feelings.

LIAM: Yes, this forgotten fragment of yours was a friend of ours.

MATT: "So you felt for this empty speck. That explains a bit."

SAM: If I may, this friend of ours, he resided in your body. You have such contempt for him, it seems.

MATT: "It's hard to have contempt for something that doesn't really matter."

SAM: But he did matter to some people. He mattered to us.

MATT: "It was but a part of myself, and I'm back."

LIAM: And you're not even curious where they came from, where they've gone now?

MATT: "I mean..."

TALIESIN: Or how you ended up that way.

MATT: "It's a bit strange, sure, but I'm sure all information will be laid bare when I finish my path."

LAURA: Was that the first time that happened?

MATT: "First time, hopefully the last time. So tell me again, why are you here? Is it vengeance?"

LAURA: No.

SAM: We came, we were hired to come here, and we were told it was an exploratory, you know--

TRAVIS: Expedition.

SAM: Expedition.

LAURA: It is a very good question, because we really could have just left after everything fell apart, but...

LIAM: I think we're seeking better understanding.

LAURA: Yeah.

ASHLEY: I think we actually were just looking for our friend, so...

MATT: "I understand grief can be hard sometimes for folks to swallow, but your friend is gone, and I've taken back what's rightfully mine."

TALIESIN: Detect undead.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: Whole room.

MATT: Nothing really--

TALIESIN: Interesting.

MARISHA: You mentioned being on a path. Where is this path leading you?

MATT: "(chuckles) North-ish. I've got unfinished business here in Eiselcross."

MARISHA: Unfinished business?

MATT: "Uh-huh."

TRAVIS: North of Aeor?

MATT: "To Aeor, if we're being specific."

TRAVIS: You've obviously detected, no doubt, that we are at a disadvantage. As was said, we were contracted to escort Lady DeRogna here, and now that she's departed, we are picking up the pieces.

SAM: Yes, we won't be paid for our services as we were promised, because you've killed our employer, and so we find ourselves... freelancing with no mission.

MATT: "If you're worried about this death being put upon you, well, rest assured, when I finish my journey, I'm more than happy to take my place, wherever such laws would deem it unnecessary."

TRAVIS: To take your place?

MATT: "To explain what I've done."

TRAVIS: So you aim to be a public figure, or is it more would you prefer to remain hidden?

MATT: "Little bit of column A, little bit of column B."

MARISHA: Sure.

TALIESIN: These people, were they following you?

MATT: "No, they just happened to be first, and not eager to share."

TALIESIN: Not going to pretend we haven't done worse.

MARISHA: You mentioned that you were the Nonagon. Have you always been the Nonagon, or is that a recent title?

MATT: "It was a title that I claimed before my brief departure from this plane."

TALIESIN: And have you killed the last person who held that title?

MATT: "No, the last person to hold that title disappeared a long time ago."

TRAVIS: Oh, shit.

LIAM: Does that have have anything to do with these? And these?

LAURA: These hands and these necks? (laughter)

SAM: The eye tattoos.

LAURA: The tattoos, specifically.

SAM: ♪ These hands ♪

LIAM: ♪ Are not my ♪

MATT: "Why yes, they do."

MARISHA: Can I insight check him on that whole "the last title was held a long time ago"?

MATT: Go for it.

MARISHA: General insight check.

TRAVIS: We'll just get a rolling insight check going.

MARISHA: Just, you know, a standard rolling insight check. 26.

MATT: 26. Seems to be telling the truth.

LAURA: Can you actually see through all those eyeballs?

MATT: "I can see many things through these eyes."

LAURA: So like, because I was scrying on you, you caught me scrying, right?

MATT: "I can see through many eyes still." As he begins to like put out his arms, you can see the eyes begin to light up red across his body, and as he does, you see the eyes of his companions, the Tomb Takers, their eyes begin to glow red, and he goes, "That way, not much can escape my vision. This blessing." And as he says that, the voices of the other Tomb Takers also speak the same words in unison with him before the red fades from their eyes and his fade as well.

MARISHA: Oh, shit.

LAURA: Did-- do-- How does-- Do you like take control when that happens, or are you all one person, or?

MATT: "We're just well-connected." And then you see over on the side, this halfling member of the Tomb Takers, in their voice, looks to you and says, "We've been through a lot, and we understand what needs to be done." He moves over to Cree, who's like-- follows up immediately after that sentence. You see that bit of red still lingering in their eyes. "That is why we fight forward, to bring the Nonagon to his destined precipice."

TALIESIN: And what is that precipice?

MATT: "Well, if you're on the same path as us, perhaps you'll see."

MARISHA: Can I see tattoos on any of the other Tomb Takers?

MATT: Make a perception check.

SAM: And how many Tomb Takers are there?

MATT: There's five currently, including Molly.

MARISHA: Nine!

SAM: And have we gotten a good look at them? Do we have descriptions yet, or no?

TRAVIS: Halfling, Cree.

MATT: So there is a halfling, who is dressed in darker leather armor, with a crossbow at their side. Their expression is a bit gaunt and sallow. Female with wild hair. There is a goliath, who is currently standing with a massive, heavy maul, the head on the ground leaning a little bit into it. The other arm resting on his other shoulder as he watches. You see there is a human woman, who has a longsword and a shield strapped across her back. Dark hair that tumbles down past the shoulders, long, in the front of half plate armor, and you also see Cree, the familiar black-furred tabaxi, standing with a necklace with a red, circular, polished orb in the center of it.

SAM: So it's four plus--

TRAVIS: Yeah.

SAM: It's four plus Molly.

TRAVIS: Oh, okay.

SAM: Or Lucien.

MATT: Lucien, I should say.

LIAM: You see so much, and then there's these. What do the Eyes of Nine mean to you, if anything?

MATT: "I have nine eyes here. Each of them granted to me by each eye that gave me this title."

LIAM: Who gave you this title?

MATT: "Maybe you'll meet them. You said you were looking for work, right? You're directionless, pathless, aimless and fearful to return for reprisal awaits you, given the loss of your employer."

SAM: No, that's absolutely true. We're probably wanted men and women here, and we have no money, and we have no purpose right now, so yes, we need a direction for sure.

MATT: "(chuckles) Well, you're free to follow. I can guarantee you, where we're going, it's only going to get stranger."

TRAVIS: You mentioned your destined precipice. Are you a believer in fate?

MATT: "Not so much in the classic sense. Divinity seems to nudge and push in places, unchallenged."

TRAVIS: It's interesting that our path has crossed with yours many times now. I wonder why that is.

MATT: "Indeed. Well, nevertheless, this has been a fun, fine conversation. We'll take what we were looking for and be on our way. And if you'd like to follow behind, well-- Be our guests," they all say in unison together.

LIAM: How far are you going? Somewhere on this sliver of reality, or further afield?

MATT: See the eyes narrow a bit from Lucien's face. "On the field, and perhaps a bit beyond."

TRAVIS: This room, if you're moving on, is extraordinary. Do you know what any of this is?

MATT: "Aye." (whistles) Begins to whistle and points upward, and you watch as the halfling and you watch as the halfling begins to walk away from the chamber and walk up the wall, and then walk across the ceiling.

LAURA: Oh, that's cool. You can walk on the ceiling?

SAM: Yeah, I can do that.

LAURA: You walk on the ceiling?

TRAVIS: Go show him.

LAURA: Why didn't you do it then, before?

SAM: I thought that I had that spell.

TRAVIS: I don't know if it's a spell.

SAM: Oh.

TRAVIS: I'll head over and put my foot on the wall.

MATT: (metal clinking) Your foot just touches the wall.

TRAVIS: Never mind, it's a spell. (laughter)

MATT: You look up and you can see now the halfling has pulled out a hammer and chisel and is currently hammering around the seam where the gem is fixed into the ceiling.

LIAM: While he works, I'm going to very obviously cast Detect Magic on it, and try to get a better understanding of it.

MATT: Okay. The magic-- there is a lot of magic in this chamber, elements of it dormant, elements of it prepped, and a lot of it funneling to this particular gem.

LIAM: I assume the Tomb Takers are a little lit up with it as well.

MATT: Yes. Armor, weapons, all have some faint magical glow to them.

TRAVIS: Going to take a step 20 feet away from Caleb.

MATT: The room has a very strong teleportation aspect to the sigils and glyphs, and the gem itself, a very strong aura of conjuration.

LIAM: Okay.

LAURA: What are you going to do with that thing?

MATT: "Maybe you'll find out."

MARISHA: Did I happen to notice any other tattoos on any of them?

MATT: You rolled a--?

MARISHA: Nine.

MATT: A nine?

MARISHA: Not great.

MATT: No, didn't notice any.

ASHLEY: I have a question. So Vess, she also had the tattoos. Who was she to you?

MATT: "(sighs) She was a traitor. Someone who agreed to help me, us really, some time ago, and, well, lied. Lied and put me from this plane for some time. Shattered me, if you will. Scattered this spirit, but they put me back together."

LIAM: Was she the one who put you in the ground?

MATT: "Aye."

TRAVIS: Fuck.

SAM: Just because I sort of relate to this, I was not in my body for a couple of years also, so I feel ya. But-- and it was a horrible experience. I was still here on this plane. Did you go elsewhere? Did you travel to somewhere else while you were out of your body?

MATT: See Lucien takes a couple steps forward and kneels in front of you, looking you directly in the eye, from about 15 feet away, although if you're still up at the top, probably looking up at you, actually. "It's one thing to be in a different body, it's another to have your very essence scattered. Your very immortal soul divided into pieces, like so much confetti. I believe you seemed to fall for one of those pieces that stuck behind, but the thing is, this soul bore the mark of those that gave me this title. They knew my import and they put me back together. And the moment that vessel became empty once more, well," looks over to Cree, I was happy to return. So if we both found our ways back to our true selves, well, it's a year for celebration, is it not?"

SAM: Yep.

LAURA: So you're like a bunch of souls?

MATT: "No. Just a healing one." You still hear the continuous (hammer clinking) across the ceiling.

LIAM: And this entity that gave you your title, your powers, I presume you are their servant, their equal?

MATT: "I am... I don't think servant's the right word. I am a student, as well as an entrusted representative."

TRAVIS: While the work is being done on the gem up top, can I loop around the back? Because there's stairs and a platform at the back of the room?

MATT: You guys are up on a platform, stairs that go down in the center as well. They are down below in the main chamber, where the gem sits.

TRAVIS: And there's no alcoves, or shelves, or other items that would be worth looking at? I'm sure, not like this big-ass gem in the ceiling, but anything at all that's interesting?

MATT: Make a perception check.

TRAVIS: 16 plus three, 19.

MATT: 19, glancing around, there aren't any shelf units, there aren't any sort of scattered boxes or loose objects. This chamber seems to be designed for a particular concentrated purpose, and you just see bits of rubble, and like fallen rock, and you do see elements where the chamber has sustained some structural damage, probably from the impact of this ruin, but for the most part, it's outfitted only in the structure itself.

TRAVIS: It's a Holodeck, y'all.

MATT: And as you're walking, getting a glance, the goliath figure is still leaning on the maul, just keeps his eye on you as you walk past. They're all just smiling creepily.

TALIESIN: Cree.

MATT: (as Cree) "Mm?"

TALIESIN: Did you dig it up, or did he come to you?

MATT: "When I heard that the vessel was available, well, I went to see if perhaps there was a chance he would return, and as you see, we were very lucky to have him back."

TALIESIN: And you're sure you put him back together right?

MATT: "Well, so far so good," you hear as her voice and his voice both merge on that final sentence.

TALIESIN: Would you even know? Well, I hope, I do hope that all the parts are there.

MATT: Tink! At that point you hear (crunching), and the goliath lets the maul fall for a second, puts the arms out and (impacts), catches this heavy blue stone, and puts it under his arm.

SAM: Does it look like just a normal jewel or anything?

LAURA: Is it a sapphire?

MATT: One side of it is polished. The part that's facing you all, it's polished smooth. The part that was set comes to a gradual point on the back end, and has various facets that are all dug towards the point. So he catches it, it almost looks like an odd, like a weather balloon shape, almost. He takes it and holds it there.

LIAM: We all know who made this. I assume that is your ticket through the veil.

MATT: "Oh, no. This is one of many gifts I bring. The ticket through the veil lies a little further down."

LIAM: I am very curious, are you looking to bring the past back to the present? Is that what this is about?

MATT: "There's a lot of things that are possible up in Aeor's ruin. I sense you're one curious about possibilities as well."

LIAM: Well, it's in my nature.

MATT: "Well, then you're going to have a lot of fun. There's so much to find."

MARISHA: You mentioned that these eyes felt you were important enough to bring back. What makes you so sure they're not going to feel the same about Vess?

MATT: "Oh. Vess has more selfish tendencies. I was the first chosen. She was the imposter, the intended usurper."

MARISHA: But still chosen. I saw those tattoos.

MATT: "Oh, those were her misunderstanding of the tome that she took from me. She had no claim to the title. Nevertheless, our work here is complete."

ASHLEY: Wait, but how do you get the tattoos? I mean, I know how you got most of your tattoos.

SAM: We've all got tattoos.

LAURA: Yeah, we've got some really cool ones.

ASHLEY: I was even with you when you got some of those, but specifically the eye tattoos, how do you get them?

MATT: "You all seem very curious."

SAM: We knew you, and you seem so different now.

LAURA: Yeah, it's kind of weird, because we thought we'd never see you up and walking again, and here you are, you're walking around, and I don't know.

SAM: Yeah, and you don't even seem curious about yourself. I mean, you were nice, we really liked you. And you don't seem to give a shit about that at all.

MARISHA: To be fair, he wasn't curious about himself when Molly was alive either.

SAM: It's fine, we'll leave you alone. You can do your stealing or whatever.

MATT: "So we're free to leave?"

TRAVIS: Oh, I don't think you're asking permission from any of us, but I think we appreciate the gesture.

MATT: "Of course. Well, we'll be on our way. Should you feel inclined, and the curiosity continues to tug at your souls, well, follow the footprints in the snow."

SAM: If we do, are we to be making camp with you and fighting off the same monsters on the path? and fighting off the same monsters on the path?

MATT: "I say this with absolute respect. Traveling with this many is an impediment to the speed of our journey. Follow if you like, but too many to keep track of, too much to draw attention, and to be perfectly honest, I like to travel with those who I can truly understand," as all the voices together say the final three words.

TRAVIS: Jesus.

SAM: Gross.

LAURA: If I send a message to you, do all the other ones hear it? Or if I send a message to Cree, would you hear it?

TRAVIS: Is this a group text?

TALIESIN: Group text.

MATT: "It's possible, depends on how carefully connected they are at the time."

LAURA: Wow.

MARISHA: Shit, I didn't mean to text that to the group. Wasn't meant for you guys, sorry.

TRAVIS: We've certainly come this far.

SAM: Sure, yes.

TALIESIN: As, I think, the only unaffiliated person in this room, I'd say that six strangers wandered into one of I'd say that six strangers wandered into one of the most dangerous places that anyone knows about without any kind of psychic eye, whatever that is, because of you. Because of two years of you. Just as a casual observer, I would be really curious about those two years.

MATT: "If it helps put your feelings to rest, I am sorry, for whatever it's worth, that your friend is gone. Whatever part of me they were, is not of me anymore. Truly gone. And I understand that can be challenging, and I'm sure even my presence now opens a wound."

TALIESIN: Insight check. Truly gone?

LAURA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: 25.

SAM: Ooh.

MATT: 25. He seems to believe what he's saying.

TALIESIN: Cool. All right. That'll do.

SAM: Well, then lead and we will follow. In fact, maybe we should all sort of declare our intent as they do, all together in unison as one, don't you think?

LAURA: Oh, yeah, that sounds like a good idea.

ASHLEY: At the same time.

SAM: Yeah, at the same time.

TRAVIS: Count it out.

ASHLEY: One, two, three.

TALIESIN: On three or after three?

TRAVIS: We're going to follow along.

SAM: Follow beside you.

LAURA: Also...

LIAM: Pick up Vess' body.

LAURA: Candy.

MATT: All of them laugh as one for about 10 seconds before falling silent simultaneously. (forced laughter)

TALIESIN: I don't get it.

MATT: "You're real cute. I'll ask that you stay at least a bit back, because you're starting to get annoying."

LAURA: Sorry.

LIAM: Where are you headed next?

MATT: "Well..."

LIAM: We do have interest here in the north.

MATT: "To alpha and alpha, then homeward bound, right?"

LAURA: Obviously.

SAM: So this is A5, so then A2?

MATT: "I've got a couple of other things to pick up," as his head nudges towards the goliath clutching the stone. "But there's always more to learn. I can't give you all the secrets right now. That's not fun. You want to earn knowledge."

SAM: Then we won't reveal all of ours either.

MATT: "Of course."

ASHLEY: Before you go, I pull out my book, with all of my flowers and things. You gave me this four leaf clover one time. And you told me that hopefully that would bring me luck, and that life would be a little bit better, so-- and it was, thanks to you. So I know you're not in there anymore, but we really did care about you. But, we'll be following behind you, be safe.

MATT: You hand him the four leaf clover? He takes it, looks it over, twirls it in his fingers. "Well, a fine gesture. We could all use some luck on the road ahead." Tucks it into his jacket.

LIAM: A minor question right before, with Detect Magic, what on Mollymauk's-- on Lucien's body lit up? I'm sure the blades. Anything else?

MATT: His entire body where any of these eyes are emanate a very strong magical aura, though it doesn't have a particular arcane school of magic that is tied to that source.

LIAM: Any other objects--?

MATT: If anything, the red eyes have just an extremely intense red glow when you're detecting in that direction.

LIAM: Okay, and any other objects on his person? Aside from both swords?

MATT: Both of the blades and the armor are this soft leather elements, like the vest and the pants that he has on all seems to be like a connected piece of equipment.

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: He puts his hands up in a "are we good?" sort of physical motion, and then takes a step forward as everyone else takes a step forward in lock step. And they push their way through you, and into the hallway.

MARISHA: As Cree passes, can I try and get a closer look at that necklace that she's wearing?

MATT: Mm-hmm. Make a perception check.

TRAVIS: Let's get him-- no, not yet.

MARISHA: 20 total.

ASHLEY: I take out my sword.

MATT: 20 total. It's a little hard to see because it's a little bit tucked into like the heavy furs around the cloak that she's wearing, the mantle piece, but you look at it and it looks like a small red globe about that big that is-- actually with a 20, you'll be able to tell, it looks like it has some sort of red liquid in it.

LAURA: Blood.

MARISHA: Blood.

MATT: Kind of sloshes a very, very little bit with her movement.

MARISHA: Okay. Is anyone else wearing anything like that, or she's the only one?

MATT: She's the only one that you can visibly see with that.

MARISHA: See, yeah.

LIAM: (silly voice) Blood magic.

LAURA: (silly voice) Blood.

MARISHA: Blood. All right, let's get to know 'em. Okay.

MATT: They all leave the chamber down the hall where you came from.

TRAVIS: I guess the first question would be, are we taking Lady DeRogna with us?

LIAM: Yes, yes.

TALIESIN: Oh, yes.

MATT: Which you do notice as they're stepping through, you do hear a "Heh," as Lucien steps over the body, and looking down gives a swift kick to the head. You hear a faint crack in the lifeless corpse.

MARISHA: Yikes.

TALIESIN: I was saving that for... It's fine. (laughter)

TRAVIS: For tea.

LAURA: "For tea."

ASHLEY: I was thirsty.

LIAM: I know that we're going to want to leave pretty soon, so I begin the process of putting her back into the necklace. It's going to take me 10 to 20 minutes.

LAURA: Do you think it's safe, Caleb? Like, with her in there, can she be scryed on? Can somebody, like, find her location in that? The same way...

LIAM: Well, if you're really worried, we can store her in this to keep her fresh, and put the necklace into one of our bags, or on Fjord's person, because of the necklace that he's wearing now.

TALIESIN: She won't decompose regardless.

LIAM: Correct.

TALIESIN: Anywhere we put her.

LAURA: But she'd be hard to fit into the bag if she's not in the little...

TALIESIN: That's fair.

LIAM: This is Liam talking. I thought things rotted and decomposed in Bags of Holding.

TALIESIN: I've cast a spell.

LIAM: Oh, okay, right.

TALIESIN: Every 10 days, I just have to tap her again.

TRAVIS: What spell is that again?

LAURA: Gentle Repose.

TALIESIN: Gentle Repose.

SAM: Don't decompose.

TRAVIS: Interesting.

TALIESIN: That way, yeah.

LAURA: Yeah, I think that'd be smart. Just so if anybody from the Assembly starts poking around.

TALIESIN: That 10-minute window for restoration is still open. No, it's not, because we didn't find her until the morning, but she's not going to go any further.

TRAVIS: Okay.

TALIESIN: Shit.

TRAVIS: It's the formaldehyde.

LAURA: Is something wrong?

LIAM: What are we doing?

LAURA: I don't know.

LIAM: What are we doing?

LAURA: What are we doing? Are we following him?

SAM: We actually followed Beau's plan. Beau was like, "Let's talk." "Let's be friends." We did it, right? Gold stars?

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah.

SAM: 'Kay.

MARISHA: Also, even though we totally sucked and let Vess die, proved my theory was right.

SAM: That's the most important thing.

TRAVIS: Definitely the most important.

MARISHA: Yeah, just felt like I should point that out.

TALIESIN: I felt like this went rather well, all things considered.

SAM: So, we're following along as they do their nefarious thing.

TALIESIN: Well...

SAM: Should we try get in front of them? Should we try to move faster than them?

MARISHA: I was wondering that, too. Or what's the most likely-- which direction they're going? Maybe we can go the opposite way and hit a different Alpha.

TRAVIS: We're at A5. The only other site on this side of that giant lava river, as indicated by this map, is A2. But it is far north and west. It's probably the furthest-- it is the furthest point from where we are right now. More center and north, a bit closer, but across the lava river is Aeor, further east and closer still, again across the lava river is A4. And then the second furthest location but far to the east is the A with the question mark.

TALIESIN: I'm feeling the question mark.

TRAVIS: Which I think we-- yeah, I am, too. I feel like that denotes it hasn't been explored.

MARISHA: Matt, he did say they were heading to A2, right?

TRAVIS: Aeor eventually.

LAURA: To Alpha and Alpha.

MARISHA: To Aeor eventually, but they didn't specify that they were going to hit A2 next, or anything like that?

LIAM: Unless that's what "to Alpha" means.

MATT: No, they said follow the path.

TRAVIS: When I asked him about Aeor, he was like, "Eventually." They have other shit to do.

TALIESIN: Hey, it's been seven days.

TRAVIS: But I think, I would guess, they got to hit all of these spots.

LAURA: I don't know.

TRAVIS: 'Cause I mean, I've they've been-- my theory would be, if they're traveling from the South, which everyone seems to need to, unless they came from the West. They have to hit one of these spots. They could have hit Syrinlya, which is on the far eastern point, so they could have hit "A?" spot first, but I think they need a piece from everything.

LIAM: It still doesn't feel like we're acting from any position of strength. They have been one step ahead of us this entire time. They've been able to watch us. There is no guarantee that if we think we're taking a shortcut or pulling a fast one on us, they won't be watching us most of the time.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Where is Lucien's next destination? I don't know. (laughter)

LIAM: Did Cad just pull out a magic eight ball?

TALIESIN: I--

TRAVIS: What is that?

LAURA: Were you trying to--?

TALIESIN: Try again later. Divine Intervention for the day.

LAURA: You were trying to get Divine Intervention?

TALIESIN: Yeah, rolled my percentile.

LAURA: Man, I got to use Divine Intervention more, y'all.

TALIESIN: Every day. Give it one roll everyday.

LAURA: Okay, okay, okay, okay.

TRAVIS: It's a lottery ticket.

LIAM: Divine intervention, y'all.

TALIESIN: One out of 10. Or no.

TRAVIS: No, it's less than that.

MARISHA: Hey, what happens if-- it seems like you need to do a ritual. Like you need somebody there to bring one of these people back, but say hypothetically if Vess were just to snap awake with life in her veins.

LIAM: I'm dragging her to the center of the room while you were talking.

MARISHA: Uh huh, I'm just talking alongside her snapped neck. What happens if she's in this thing? Would she immediately suffocate if she tried to come back to life in there?

LIAM: I don't think she's coming back to life if she's in here.

TALIESIN: You would have to be there. She's been dead awhile.

LAURA: Yeah, also I don't think she's a true Nonagon. I think she was trying to be a Nonagon. I bet she got these things tattooed onto herself. But Lucien's tattoos...

TALIESIN: She's a Not-agon, is what you're saying.

LAURA: She's a Not-agon?

MARISHA: She's a Not-agon?

LAURA: That's right. Lucien's came from the entities he said, whatever the nine entities were. They were gifts.

TALIESIN: I feel if we're going to have a real discussion about this, we should do it somewhere warm.

LIAM: These are great questions, by the way, for Lady DeRogna.

SAM: Yes, we should definitely ask her what's going on.

LAURA: We haven't talked to her yet?

MARISHA: We talked to her.

TALIESIN: It takes seven days before we can, and it's only been.

MARISHA: We can talk to her.

LIAM: We can.

TALIESIN: Has it been seven days?

LIAM: Well, I don't know but Caleb does. How long has it been?

MATT: It's been about five and a half days.

TRAVIS: Five and a half.

LAURA: Soon.

TALIESIN: A couple more days and then we can ask five more questions.

MARISHA: When's our window, though, of when we need to bring her back to life?

TALIESIN: That's gone.

LAURA: I mean we can technically bring her back, like, after a year.

TRAVIS: We're not doing that, right?

TALIESIN: But that's a big spell.

TRAVIS: We're not doing that.

MARISHA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: And that's a lot.

TRAVIS: Yeah, we know more about her than she ever wanted us to know. She would try and fuck us up. That's not an ally.

SAM: Yeah, but we're giving her life.

TRAVIS: So?

SAM: We can bring her back.

TRAVIS: "Thank you." (explosion)

LIAM: We offer her life and get the answers we need. She could bring the entire power of the Cerberus Assembly to bear upon us. She's dangerous.

LAURA: She's bad person, probably.

MARISHA: Yeah, I just don't want to be framed for murder, that's all.

SAM: Well, we don't know what we're getting into so, aside asking the dead body of Vess some more questions in a day and a half, is there any way to find out what the fuck is going on and where we're going and what's at these places?

LAURA: I mean, I feel like what we need to do is figure out what the fuck exactly a Nonagon is. What it is that Lucien's is trying to accomplish. That's the only way we're going to be able to tell the Assembly that's what Vess DeRogna was into, right?

TRAVIS: The nine of them gave him this. The nine of who? People?

MARISHA: He said "each eye." He was granted by each eye.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MARISHA: The Eyes of Nine.

SAM: Sort of like council?

TRAVIS: Deities? People?

SAM: The city council on that crazy dream city that we saw?

TRAVIS: Yeah. I don't know. Yeah.

MARISHA: Mm-hmm.

SAM: They maybe gave him-- they deputized him to come here.

TRAVIS: How many Betrayer Gods are there?

SAM: Find a landing spot for their city?

ASHLEY: Who was the original one?

TALIESIN: The Octagon.

LAURA and MARISHA: (chuckling)

ASHLEY: That's before the Nonagon.

TALIESIN: Sorry, can't help it. Feel bad about that.

ASHLEY: Don't feel bad.

TALIESIN: Yeah. Guilt is real.

TRAVIS: Are there eight Betrayer Gods?

MATT: Let me go check real fast.

TALIESIN: We could get ahold of the library, ask about Nonagon, I don't know if we ever--

MARISHA: I already have.

TALIESIN: About Nonagon specifically?

MARISHA: Yeah. They didn't really seem to know much.

MATT: There are nine Betrayer Gods as of 20 years ago.

MARISHA: There are nine Betrayer Gods?

SAM: 20 years ago?

LIAM: 'Cause of Vecnards.

SAM: Oh.

MATT: Correct. The newest in the pantheon.

TALIESIN: Huh.

TRAVIS: I'm sure that's just some Fjord Stone bullshit.

LIAM: We're right now sitting in the ruins of an ancient civilization that was flying through the sky, crashed here. We've had a vision of a city flying through the ether somewhere. Is Lucien really serving ancient Zemnians?

TRAVIS: Oh man.

LIAM: Something else?

TRAVIS: We have to make a choice. It's clear we're going one of these four other places, yes?

TALIESIN: Yes.

SAM: It makes the most sense to me to at least follow them along to see which direction they're heading.

TRAVIS: Great call, that's a great call. We'll know quickly.

TALIESIN: Glance out the door and we just don't go that direction.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MARISHA: Well, we could still follow them for a bit because they could be trying to avoid landmarks or certain impassable terrain, so I think we do need to track them for just a little bit.

TRAVIS: I think it'd be a fair guess that Aeor, because it is the biggest dot on this thing and it seems like the HQ of it all, that would probably be the last place to go with maybe remnants from the other sites.

MARISHA: What do you think that giant crystal was? He said he needed more things.

LIAM: Well, the kind of magic it was shedding, it's for either pulling something here or sending something elsewhere.

TRAVIS: Pulling something here?

LAURA: Teleporting? It's a teleporting stone?

MATT: Make an arcana check.

TRAVIS: Oh boy.

LIAM: (clicks tongue) High. It's very high. 30.

MATT: 30. That was the largest threshold crest you've ever seen.

LAURA: Oh! That's what they use. That's a city mover, right?

MATT: Threshold crests are smaller elements because it's a very, very specific--

TRAVIS: Holy fuck. sort of magic and is largely based in older, pre-Calamity magic.

LIAM: That's what all of this is around us. This is old, very old.

SAM: Old magic.

LIAM: The oldest.

TRAVIS: Oh, it was old magic.

LIAM: It was old magic!

TALIESIN: That brought that game around.

TRAVIS: I should have foreseen.

LIAM: The Mighty Nein. They're always after me Lucky Charms.

MATT: It hits you like a lighting bolt. All of that, that entire complicated lattice of glyphwork and magic scrolling is one whole threshold crest. You've seen them used to move large cities and even large objects on a smaller scale. This was very big.

MARISHA: It's got to be the same city, right?

LAURA: Yeah.

MARISHA: It's got to be the same city.

LAURA: They're bringing it back.

MARISHA: They're trying to bring it back. Or he said-- He did say this plane, maybe beyond.

LAURA: What if he doesn't know everything?

TALIESIN: I don't think so.

LAURA: And he's just following the signs, too.

SAM: He knows.

LAURA: I know a lot of times when people act all mysterious it's because they don't actually have the answers and they want to seem like they know it so they answer things in riddles.

MARISHA: It's very Mollymauk.

TALIESIN: Right there.

SAM: Is that true? Or is it the most true thing you've ever said? Am I doing it?

LAURA: No, I don't think that's quite right, but you get the idea.

TRAVIS: Has it been more than ten minutes? I know we want to keep a distance, but also the elements are brutal and we don't want to lose all traces of where they're going.

LIAM: I probably need about five minutes, please.

MARISHA: You need five minutes?

SAM: Okay.

TALIESIN: We'll get moving when you're done.

SAM: How long did it take us to get down here? Just a few minutes or was it like a long, long time?

MATT: To get down to this point? It's probably been a number of hours.

TRAVIS: We got a big-ass tunnel to go back up.

SAM: Should one of us start heading up, so we can talk to Dagen ahead of time and see if he's going to come with or?

TRAVIS: Oh, they're going to pass Dagen. You should send Dagen a message.

LAURA: I'm going to send Dagen a message. I use my Pearl of Power to lose my last third.

SAM: Tell him to hide.

LAURA: Dagen, there's going to be a group of people coming out.

LIAM: Probably. Yeah, because they went unchecked.

LAURA: Just tell them you're with us or hide. Be safe. We love you.

MARISHA: Aw man, I really hoping he doesn't...

TALIESIN: That might have been too much right there. You're going to scare him off.

SAM: "Tell him he's with us or hide." Okay. Okay, those are both good options.

MATT: The only response you get is, "Right."

MARISHA: Okay.

TRAVIS: He's savvy, he's savvy.

LAURA: He's so savvy.

ASHLEY: He'll be okay, he'll be okay.

TALIESIN: To the point.

MARISHA: Well, if he's going around collecting giant threshold, gate stone, crest things, then, yeah, let's go get us a threshold-stone-gate thing.

LAURA: And destroy it so he can't bring it back. Because that thing is scary, That city is scary.

TRAVIS: What are we going to do with a two-foot wide?

SAM: We couldn't even pry a stone out of a column.

TALIESIN: What if you tried to do something with it out here where everything's kind of cuckoo?

TRAVIS: Big stone.

TALIESIN: Maybe that's what going home's about.

LIAM: Maybe.

TALIESIN: Or maybe not.

LIAM: But all across this land there are fragments of a city that used to fly through the sky and we've been told about this crater that changes for everyone who looks at it. So obviously, reality in that area is a little wibbly wobbly. And everything that is scattering this landscape probably broke off upon descent and that city plummeted into where that crater is and punched a hole through it like wet tissue paper and is somewhere else. And they're collecting a threshold crest to bring back the city proper.

LAURA: Do you need more than one threshold crest to bring back a city?

LIAM: Do I know that? From all I've read of the old times?

MATT: You would need to, based on the size, yeah, because the threshold crest can only-- it's like triangulating a position and then everything whin there can be transported.

LAURA: Okay, then yeah, let's go to A5 and get another one.

LIAM: You have to bedazzle--

TRAVIS: A5?

LIAM: -- the bottom of the city a little bit.

SAM: Oh, should we at least see which direction they set out for?

MARISHA: Let's see which direction they're going.

TRAVIS: We're in A5.

LAURA: "A?"!

LIAM: I've got her. (whooshes)

MARISHA: You've got her? You're good?

TRAVIS: You got her.

LAURA: Put it in the thing.

ASHLEY: There's nothing else to see? There's nothing else to see in here? No other doors no other? No other--

MATT: In the chamber you're in right now?

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MATT: Make a perception check.

TRAVIS: Oh, I have the amber.

ASHLEY: Okay.

TRAVIS: I have the amber, is that right?

LAURA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Yeah, yeah.

LIAM: It's easier than a body.

SAM: Were there any altars or boxes or anything around?

MATT: Not in this chamber. Not that you can see. If you want to make a perception check--

TALIESIN: Oh, I was going to say I would have taken a look around, just 'cause.

MATT: Sure, give it roll.

TALIESIN: 29.

SAM: Jesus.

MATT: 29? No, I mean, beyond the bodies that have been sundered and left behind.

TALIESIN: They picked everything off those bodies.

SAM: No, they just killed them.

MATT: They just killed them.

SAM: Yeah, I'm going to go pick through the bodies.

LIAM: Were they glow-y? When I checked the entire room?

MATT: No. You do find amongst them a number of pickaxes. They have been carving away chunks of stone. You can see some of the designs that you've seen in previous chambers as you first entered this subterranean ruin where they've carved off examples of it and managed to pull different elements to possibly sell to other individuals or bring them back, but everything seems to be just standard collections of hunks of the ruin around you. Nothing of particular worth. Or anything that was of worth might've already been taken.

SAM: All right, well, then lets go. Is there any way to get out of here super fast? Do we have a Find the Path thing or something?

TALIESIN: I think I saw an exit door behind that giant spider.

SAM: (blows raspberry)

TALIESIN: Anyone? Okay, no. All right.

LAURA: We probably just go back the way we came.

SAM: All right, yeah. Do we need, like, super speed or anything? No.

TALIESIN: No, I think we'll just-- the old fashion way.

TRAVIS: (laughing) We don't have super speed.

LIAM: That was last campaign.

TRAVIS: All right, we start heading back.

LAURA: Except I've used all my Polymorph and everything so, I guess.

LIAM: I haven't.

LAURA: Okay.

SAM: I'll bonus action super speed.

MATT: Okay. So you dart through the hall, you rapidly make your way ahead of the whole group. (whooshing) Full on, like, Naruto running down the hallway. Eventually coming to the base of the pit.

SAM: It's dark. I'll just wait. (laughter) You guys almost here?

TRAVIS: You don't want to see if there's any more of your little oozy friends waiting?

SAM: I'll look around. Oh, I still have the goggles. I'll look around and see if there's any more oozes.

MATT: Make perception check.

SAM: Seven.

MATT: Seven? Not that you can tell.

SAM: Yeah. We're fine.

LAURA: I hang back as we're walking back and I talk to Beau. Do you think he's really, really gone? Or do you think he was lying and part of Molly is still in there?

MARISHA: I think there's got to be a part of Molly still in there. He said so himself that there was a fragment of him and then that fragment grew into Molly, so.

LAURA: That's so weird.

MARISHA: It had to be a little piece of him, you know?

MARISHA: It had to be a little piece of him, you know?

LAURA: Molly was so cool, though.

MARISHA: I mean, look at Lucien.

LAURA: He was pretty cool.

MARISHA: I mean, he's kind of a charlatan just like Molly. You kind of see where there's still some similarities, You kind of see where there's still some similarities, I think that's what's tripping me up.

LAURA: Yeah.

MARISHA: Even him claiming about how he had no interest in his past or who he was and those were exact things that Molly said.

LAURA: Makes it hurt more again.

MARISHA: It does. It's like he's still dead, but now we're--

LAURA: I've kind of been holding out hope as we got closer, he would-- I don't know, he would see us all and remember us and-- I don't know.

MARISHA: It's like being gaslit by a dead guy.

LAURA: (quiet sad laugh)

MARISHA: Makes you feel like none of those memories are real even when you know they were.

LAURA: They were.

MARISHA: Molly was a real person, yeah?

LAURA: Got his tarot cards to prove it.

MARISHA: (chuckles) Still got his damn belt.

LAURA: (chuckles) Yasha's got his coat. He was real.

MARISHA: Well. I don't think this is going to get any easier.

LAURA: (sighs) Okay.

MARISHA: Let's go stop our dead, evil friend.

LAURA: Yeah.

LIAM: Okay, with me, two at a time. Who wants to go up first? I turn into a giant spider at the bottom of the pit.

TRAVIS: Why a spider?! What is the matter with you?! There's so many different forms you could choose. What?

MATT: With all the loud noises, Caduceus, you notice that in the nearby rocks, a familiar, black tar-like substance begins to emerge.

SAM: Why don't I just lift us all up?

TRAVIS: It's again.

LAURA: Oh yeah, that works, too.

SAM: Yeah, I'll cast Levitation.

LAURA: On all of us, you can do that?

SAM: Think so.

SAM: What? You're a rogue. Oh wait, no, it's only one creature or 500 pounds of objects, not creatures, apparently. Never mind. Bye, guys! (laughter)

TRAVIS: Amazing!

TALIESIN: I'm going to-- So we've got to only move one person at a time?

LAURA: Well no, I'll use my 5th-level.

TALIESIN: Or I can just try, just because I'm curious about this, yeah, I'm going to cast Antilife Shell.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: That should do it.

LAURA: What is that?

TRAVIS: I thought it was...

TALIESIN: Yeah, unless there's a ranged attack that an oil creature can make. It's basically no living thing can get inside. That I don't want.

MATT: Yeah, for a 10-foot radius.

TALIESIN: Yep.

LAURA: Oh.

TALIESIN: It's not big.

MATT: You watch as Caduceus, after generating a little bit of faint energy, puts the hands up and energy expands into this dome-like bubble around him. And as you all gather close while your rogue and spider friend, with who is heading up first?

LIAM: I grab Jester in mandibles and start climbing.

LAURA: No, I want to hold onto your back! Get me out of your mouth!

MATT: (chuckles) You're in mandibles, sorry.

LAURA: (groans)

MATT: (chuckles)

TRAVIS: Is it only one person at a time?

LIAM: Not exactly sure how big I am as a spider.

MATT: A giant spider, you'd be able to carry maybe two people and that's not-- that would be your maximum and that's pushing it a little bit, I think.

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: For going vertically.

LIAM: A bunch of eyes just turn and stare at you, Fjord.

TRAVIS: Oh fine, I'm going. (moaning)

LAURA: Fjord gets to ride on the back.

TRAVIS: (moaning)

LAURA: Fjord gets to be on your back!

MATT: While you guys are being carried up the side of this tunnel, the rest of you are huddled-- the rest of you being Beau and Yasha, next to Caduceus inside this bubble. As this black pudding (squelches).

TALIESIN: Nope, nope, nope, nope.

MARISHA: What are we going to do?

TRAVIS: On the bubble?

MATT: Begins to just wrap itself around the barrier. It's held at bay.

TALIESIN: Interesting thing about Antilife Shell, I believe, is that you can shoot through it and it doesn't break. And the creature can't get through. The only way a creature could get through is if I stepped towards it.

MATT: Correct.

TALIESIN: So I can just take potshots at this thing and doesn't matter.

MATT: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Awesome.

TALIESIN: All right I'm just going to take some fucking--

LIAM: (as the black pudding) I just want to love you.

TALIESIN: Yeah, I'm just going to gently take my time, very carefully.

MATT: It lasts up to an hour. You don't need to roll damage.

TALIESIN: Okay, I'm just, poke poke. (whooshes)

MATT: Just Sacred Flaming it repeatedly.

TALIESIN: Just Sacred Flaming.

LIAM: (black pudding dying noises)

MATT: You watch as it quivers and burns and over the period of the next few minutes of so, Caduceus slowly melts down this black pudding.

TALIESIN: It's not cool, it's not cool.

MATT: Until, one by one, you all of you are carried to the top of this pit by Caleb. And there you find yourself, back in the familiar frozen chamber. You eventually climb your way up the incline to the previous room on its side. Finding the familiar crack opening where you first entered this ruin from the tunnel beyond.

TALIESIN: I still have my little soap bubble. I'm not putting it down.

MATT: You got it.

LIAM: At least two or three times on the walk, a couple of spider legs just go (clicking) on Fjord's back.

MATT and TALIESIN: Aw.

ASHLEY: When I get up there--

LIAM: (clicking)

TRAVIS: I know it's you. I know it's you. I know it's you!

ASHLEY: When I get up there to Caleb, I'm going to give him some scritches on the side and I'm going to say: I'm going to eat you! (laughter) Scritchy scritchy.

MATT: Perfect.

LIAM: (spits)

ASHLEY: Ah!

MATT: Thankfully, the spider that you saw when you first entered has not given chase.

TRAVIS: Oh!

LAURA: What the eff is with that spider?

MATT: You begin to climb your way out of the ruin, head up through the tiny crack, pushing through on your chest, squeezing ever so uncomfortably through with the rope, the same process that you entered through. Until eventually, you find yourself emerging once more into the steadily more and more freezing weather that awaits you in the exterior of Eiselcross.

ASHLEY: We're just going to leave that spider up there?

TRAVIS: Didn't we encounter a similar spider in the sewers in the very early parts of the game?

LIAM: That was a phase spider.

LAURA: That was a phase spider.

LIAM: It was a long time ago.

TALIESIN: Wow.

SAM: Totally different spider.

TRAVIS: Look, spiders suck, man, okay? They suck.

ASHLEY: Yeah, but he was just looking at us. There's something in there.

LAURA: I mean, probably.

SAM: Could be something in there. I say as I rise up through the pit on my elevator.

TRAVIS: No.

MATT: Veth is still behind in the elevator, apparently, while you guys are exiting the front of the--

SAM: Hi. Where'd you guys go? It only moves 20 feet a turn. (laughter)

MARISHA: Let's not lose their tracks.

TRAVIS: We keep going.

MATT: Yes. Eventually, you see the familiar sight of the gray sky before you. It's later in the afternoon, Caleb is able to gauge, though the weather has remained unchanged with a very, very faint, soft snowfall. You find your way to the little antechamber where you found the remnants of a long abandoned campsite and the drow corpse that you uncovered. And carefully you step out into the open sky above.

LAURA: Is Dagen there?

MATT: Go ahead and make a perception check.

SAM: Oh boy. Just blood everywhere.

LAURA: 10.

MATT: 10? You don't see him.

LIAM: Dagen?

SAM: Where was he before? Where did we see him last?

MATT: You saw him make his way off to one of the nearby cliffs to hide.

TRAVIS: It's us, coast is clear! You can show yourself!

MATT: You see a hooded head poke up. "We're good?"

LAURA: Oh, yeah.

TRAVIS: Yes, did you see the party we were mentioning leave?

MATT: "Hold on," and you see him back away. And then you hear-- (whoosh) as you see him in his chair just ski through and around the other side and before-- he hits the switch that puts the brakes on it before it comes to a stop and he goes, "Yeah, saw them leave. Bunch of weird looking figures. Do you know them?"

LAURA: Not really.

MARISHA: Distant acquaintances.

TALIESIN: Complicated.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MARISHA: Did you see which direction they went?

MATT: "Yeah, they went northward."

TRAVIS: Northward. I think the plan is to follow at a distance, safely.

MATT: "So they are friends."

LAURA: (uncertain babbling)

TRAVIS: More like, yet to be determined.

MATT: "Right." He tightens his grip on his axe.

LIAM: We're considering an alliance, but we're not quite sure how we feel about it.

MATT: "Tenuous alliance."

LAURA: Yeah, that we'll probably betray in the end.

MATT: "Up here? Probably."

LAURA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: How many times have you made it to the destination of Aeor?

MATT: "Me, full journey three times."

TRAVIS: How far from this point would it-- how long would it take to get there?

MATT: "To the actual main ruin? I'll put that probably in the neighborhood of about 10 days or so. Could be a little longer of straight shot. Getting across that fire river sometimes can take a day depending on how the weather's going."

SAM: If you wanted to shave off a day or two, is there a super dangerous shortcut we could take to get there before the other party did?

MATT: "I mean, teleport."

SAM: Oh, well, I mean, not magic.

MATT: "I'm afraid you're going to have to go the old-fashioned Dagen way. Which is about, you know, going at a person's pace."

LAURA: We could Polymorph every day. Try to get some time shaved off by flying.

SAM: We could just stay up all night a couple nights and be exhausted.

TRAVIS: Also it's important to note what he said, lava river? It's more like a great lake. It's really, really wide.

LAURA: Does it take a day to cross it?

MATT: "Oh, could take a day to wait for the weather and then having to get across is an issue."

TRAVIS: It's pretty big.

MATT: "Do you not know anything about the river?"

LAURA: No, we just know it's a river and it's lava.

TRAVIS: We see a flow shift.

LAURA: Fjord bought a ring just in case. His foresight was so good. But...

ASHLEY: How--

MATT: "You got a ring for a river?"

TRAVIS: Oh, I have a ring for every occasion.

MATT: "That's impressive."

ASHLEY: How wide is the river again?

MATT: "At places it can be close to a mile wide."

ASHLEY: (exhales)

TRAVIS: (laughs)

ASHLEY: And just straight lava?

MATT: "Yeah, its one of the strange quirks here in Eiselcross. The flow shift you're talking about is where it seems to emerge from the ground, from wherever, and then divides its flow to the north and south sides of Foren. Weird quirk of this river, snow doesn't melt when it touches."

LIAM: What do you mean?

MATT: "Meaning that's how you have to wait for the weather to cross. You got to wait for enough snow to gather, so you can walk across it."

TRAVIS: Oh my god.

TALIESIN: That sounds like a terrible idea.

LIAM: Snow covering lava.

SAM: How does that work? Is it hot?

MATT: "I mean, the lava's hot, yeah, but--"

SAM: The snow doesn't melt.

MATT: "Like I said, Eiselcross is a very weird place. That's why it's good to have the proper guard. The proper person showing you around."

SAM: Yeah, yeah of course. On these previous treks have you lost any of your traveling companions?

MATT: "Not by my mistakes, no." (laughter)

SAM: The folks that you escorted, were any of them, you know, named Sheila?

LAURA: (giggles quietly)

MATT: "Why do you ask?"

SAM: I'm just curious.

MATT: "No."

SAM: Okay.

MATT: "Anyway, I'm at your disposal. You just point a direction and go. Are we following those folks or we going somewhere else?"

TRAVIS: One more question actually, there is a point demarcated as "A?". I think from our conversations with Lady DeRogna that those sites were yet to be explored, or not fully excavated. About how long would it take to get there from here, would you estimate?

MATT: He looks over the map. "Yeah, from where we are now it'll take us about eight days."

LIAM: (exhales)

LAURA: Eight days.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

ASHLEY: That's to the question mark?

SAM: And what's there? Have you been there?

MATT: "(sighs) I haven't been to that particular ruin site. I've been around the area. I know how to get there. This map isn't too specific, so it'd be like finding a needle in a snow-covered haystack."

MARISHA: And what about from here to Aeor?

TRAVIS: 10 days.

LAURA: What about from question mark to Aeor?

MATT: "Uh--"

TRAVIS: Longer.

LIAM: It's a lot of mountains.

MATT: "Probably about another 10 days or so. About the same distance where we are now as Aeor would be from there."

TRAVIS: Through the mountains for it to be 10 days.

LAURA: So if we take the chance and try to go there, we could miss them by a week or more.

TALIESIN: I don't think they're going straight there. I think they're hitting more sites and more sites.

MARISHA: I know, but we still don't want to try and take the gamble by just hitting one site and they hit three and still make it to Aeor before we do.

TALIESIN: That's a site that hadn't already been plundered.

SAM: We have no idea what's at these sites. All we know is they're going to A2 right now, right?

TRAVIS: They're going north, that's about it. Could be A2 or Aeor. They're both--

SAM: And he said "Alpha and Alpha", so it's probably an Alpha, which is A2. That's to the north. So we know that there's something there. That's the only thing we know. "A?" could be nothing.

TRAVIS: Could be.

TALIESIN: But it could be--

SAM: It's clearly not important enough for them to go there.

TALIESIN: Or they don't know about it.

TRAVIS: Or they may just not have head in that direction yet. We should follow them for, like, a day.

TALIESIN: But I don't think we should be behind them. I think that we should be--

SAM: I think we should be before them.

TALIESIN: -- cutting them... We've got Dagen! He's the best guide in these parts. He can lead us there faster than anyone.

TALIESIN: I don't think it matters if we get there before them if they've got everything they need already.

SAM: No, they don't. They're going there to get the thing that they need. We can get there first and get it.

MARISHA: Talking about going to A2. Not Aeor, but A2.

SAM: Why wouldn't we go-- we got Dagen!

TRAVIS: Each one of the cities have something that they need so we could go to "A?" and hold the last remaining piece like we have with Uk'otoa, or the only things they need are at A2 and Aeor.

SAM: Yeah.

TALIESIN: I think that there's a better chance of us not-- I think running into them somewhere is a terrible idea. I think it's going to lead to a fight. And I think that there's-- the notion that there's a site that hasn't been touched? I mean, that could be anything.

TRAVIS: I love a question mark. I'm having a real hard time going anywhere but the question mark.

TALIESIN: I think it's a better risk.

SAM: If we spend eight days getting there and it is nothing, nothing, no interest at all, we will have fucked ourselves.

TRAVIS: Yeah. It's a big miss.

SAM: If we at least go where we know they are going, we know it's important.

TALIESIN: Well, we won't know why because they would have already gotten there.

SAM: No, we got Dagen! We're getting there first!

TRAVIS: (laughs)

TALIESIN: Dagen, do you feel that somehow--

SAM: We are 20 minutes behind them.

TALIESIN: -- lapping these people is possible?

SAM: We have 10 days to make it up.

TRAVIS: Veth, aren't you at least intrigued by the question mark?

SAM: Absolutely not! If it was important enough, it would have a number after it.

MATT: "Here's my question. If you're wanting to follow their tracks, then there's no use in getting ahead of them because then the tracks can't be followed, but if we're trying to get ahead of them because you don't care about the tracks, we can get ahead of them."

SAM: Yes!

MARISHA: We can get ahead of them?

SAM: Fucking Dagen!

MATT: "I mean, I don't know who they are, I don't know how well they travel, but I can get you there faster than you'd be on your own."

TRAVIS: Not what we needed to hear. Dammit.

TALIESIN: I just am still feeling that the question mark makes sense to me.

SAM: The question-- why-- we're closer to the question mark than A2, right?

TRAVIS: Yes.

SAM: So, if it was that important, they would go there first.

LAURA: They don't know about it!

TALIESIN: They don't know it's there.

SAM: Why wouldn't they now about it?

MATT: "The A2 on the map from where we are right now is about six days from us. Five, six days."

TRAVIS: Oh, this map is all fucked up.

ASHLEY: So A2 is north and the question mark is?

TRAVIS: East, east.

LIAM: I agree with Veth. Trust me, this entire landscape is probably littered with things that I am very, very curious about.

MATT: "Sorry, about eight days to A2."

LIAM: Why else are we here if not to figure out what Lucien is doing? And to go off in an entirely different direction for question mark, for who knows? And to potentially lose their trail entirely.

SAM: Yeah, think of it like this metaphor. Say we were just walking through the snow and we saw a post sticking up out of it that could be anything. It could be jewels, it could be nothing. Should we go after it? Or should we keep walking to our destination?

LAURA: Well that's a good question. Caleb, what do you think?

LIAM: Well, that's worse even because that shit was directly in front of us and this is eight days march to the west.

TRAVIS: This is a metaphor. No, metaphor.

LAURA: It's a metaphor, metaphor.

LIAM: I think we all know what's going on here. (laughter)

SAM: I vote A2.

TRAVIS: Yeah, let's vote. Show of hands to go north towards A2 or Aeor?

MARISHA: Wait, what about A4? We haven't talked about A4.

SAM: What?

TRAVIS: Yeah, nobody's talking about that shit. Anybody want A4?

SAM: But why would A4 be any less important than "A?"?!

TRAVIS: Because it's a question mark!

TALIESIN: Because they may not know about it.

TRAVIS: That's gamer logic, baby.

SAM: We have to assume that Lucien knows all this shit already.

LIAM: We are talking to you, not Travis. Now focus.

TRAVIS: Yes.

LIAM: We have no purpose in that direction. We don't know what that is. Are we just treasure hunters who don't care about the visions this one has had?

MARISHA: It's not about treasure hunting. Let's think about this logically. We know, hang on, hang on, hang on. We know that he's looking for threshold gates, right? What are they called? Crests! That's what they're called. We know he's looking for threshold crests. We are basically gambling on if we are going to get to him sooner if we try to go to A2. It's a race.

SAM: It's not a gamble.

MARISHA: It's a gamble.

SAM: It's not a gamble.

MARISHA: It's a gamble.

SAM: Dagen just said it. Hundred percent sure, confidence. Dagen?

MATT: "I'm real lost right now."

SAM: You can get us anywhere here faster than those fuckers, right?

LIAM: The gamble is going to a question mark.

MATT: "I can get there faster than you would on your own and based on how they're traveling on foot, unless they're really familiar with the landscape, they don't have me helping them out, I could probably get you there quicker than they can."

MARISHA: There's pros and cons to this, because let's think about this.

TALIESIN: And what happens if they get there before us?

MARISHA: Or--

SAM: Still get to see what it is. What they were doing there. What they're going to to use it for. We still get all kinds of precious information. We can race them to the next one. Or we could go to A4 while they go to "A?". We can still do the same thing.

MARISHA: Or we do get there ahead of them, but barely, and then it's a fight against Lucien on the way out because we stole his shit before them. If we go to "A?", we know they're not going there and we would be basically running a solo mission.

LIAM: I do not follow this logic.

TRAVIS: She's explaining it.

LIAM: We don't know what they're doing.

TRAVIS: She's explaining it! Let her finish!

LIAM: We don't know what their purpose is with these stones.

MARISHA: Well, we know that you need a lot of stones in order to teleport a giant city like this, right? They've got to be scattered literally everywhere if Aeor is as huge as it is. If "A?" is undiscovered, the likelihood that there is some sort of threshold crest there is plausible. It's really just, like, a risk management type of thing. Which one do we want to do? Do we risk doing the race and potentially having a fight ahead of time with Lucien? Or, taking a big question mark, potentially more time, but we have a pretty good idea that we're not going to maybe get into a premature fight with someone who can explode people's brains?.

TALIESIN: High risk, high reward.

LIAM: Okay, so say that you are correct. Let's say that there is the type of stone that they would want at question mark, but there is also a stone where they are going?

LAURA: They need all of the stones.

LIAM: We don't know that at all. We don't know that at all.

TRAVIS: It's true.

LIAM: They could go north, get everything they need, and be gone. And we get to question mark and find a stone. Hooray, we have a stone, and they're gone. We don't know where they went, how they used it, what their plan was, nothing.

TRAVIS: True, that's very true.

TALIESIN: That's fair.

ASHLEY: Both are very, very good points.

TALIESIN: We don't even necessarily know that they're just looking for stones; they just have one.

LIAM: We have no idea what they're doing.

SAM: They already could have four stones and they just needed this one extra one. Now they're going to pick up some box of gold and then they're getting out of here. We have no idea.

LAURA: Should I send a message and ask them?

SAM: Sure.

LIAM: He's probably watching us have this conversation.

TRAVIS: Oh, yes.

TALIESIN: Oh.

MARISHA: That is a good point, though, because he said to follow him. Once again, he always said even if we decide to go a different path, we can always try and check in on him. Say, "Hey." We know that he'll be looking back, but.

TRAVIS: We could also just see what he does for a half day's travel, a day's travel. If he goes north, he's going north. If he starts to turn, because there is a land mass here, then he's not going north.

SAM: Okay.

MARISHA: Also, even if we just follow him for half a day, maybe Dagen can get a good bead on him and then we could be a little bit more sure if we know that we could outpace them.

MATT: "I don't mean to pry in business. It's really not what you hired me for, but--"

TALIESIN: Please.

MATT: "Are y'all trying to teleport a city?"

TALIESIN: Oh, boy, that's a conversation.

LAURA: Well, we're not. You know, but, who knows, other people might be and that could be dangerous.

MARISHA: Why, do you know about teleporting cities?

MATT: "No, it just seems like a lot of city to teleport."

LIAM: Dagen, it's all speculation and myth and legend. You must know, it abounds in this place. There's so many strange mysteries, magic doesn't work properly.

MATT: "I mean, yeah, there's all sorts of mysteries."

LIAM: Tall tales.

MATT: "Completely. It's just a lot of city to teleport."

SAM: You talking about Aeor?

MATT: "Yeah, the main ruin."

MARISHA: They're going to need a lot of threshold crests.

SAM: Have you been to other major cities around the world? Can you compare it in size?

MATT: "I'd say, just the central ruin there, the crater that's filled with ice that's over the ruin is probably about, I don't know, a handful of miles across."

MARISHA: "Handful of miles."

TALIESIN: More than a couple.

MATT: "I mean, the ruin there, you can see there's some of the tower still poking through the ice itself. That's how the ruin was found. So, it's a big city. At least as much of a chunk that resides there."

MARISHA: We have a few other options. Not to muddy this up, but if we're looking for information, Vess, whenever we can talk to her again.

LIAM: Couple days.

MARISHA: Cobalt Soul knew nothing. And they said all the pieces and everything that'd been uncovered from these areas all laid in the hands of the Cerberus Assembly. They also said that it's been an arms race between the Cerberus Assembly and the Dynasty. Could call up some of our old friends.

MARISHA: Maybe Essek knows something about it.

MARISHA: Correct.

TALIESIN: That's a really good idea.

MARISHA: They might know, because this is Vess' map. We already ran into one pillar with one giant green emerald that we couldn't yank from it. That's her map of the excavation sites that she knows. Essek and the Dynasty could have a whole other excavation map with a whole bunch of other "A?"s on it.

TALIESIN: They probably would want to hear about what happened to their crew.

TRAVIS: Unless this is Lucien's map. And she just had it.

TALIESIN: Oh, this is a good plan.

SAM: So we're going to start walking after the party and during that day that we're following them we can make some phone calls, or you know, calls. I just invented phones, canon.

LIAM: Similarly, I was considering contacting Astrid and Eadwulf.

TALIESIN: Let's start with--

TRAVIS: Ooh.

SAM: Do they know about this stuff?

TRAVIS: They could.

LIAM: I have to assume Astrid knows a lot.

LAURA: Do you think you can trust them, Caleb?

LIAM: No.

TRAVIS: Even Astrid?

TALIESIN: I feel like the Dynasty will ask fewer questions.

LAURA: At least Essek.

TALIESIN: Maybe.

MARISHA: And you're sure?

TALIESIN: Maybe?

MARISHA: She was working with Trent, and it seems like Vess kept a lot of shit secret from Trent and Ludinus and the rest of the Cerberus Assembly. I don't know if she's that-- I don't know if this reaches her pay grade.

TRAVIS: Should we walk and talk?

MARISHA: Let's walk and talk. Yeah, we were walking and talking.

LAURA: We're walking and talking.

LIAM: I think she knows quite a bit. I think that she's been trained to take over things. But they're not the only option, to be sure.

MATT: "So we're moving, all right."

TALIESIN: We've been walking 20 minutes, I don't know what--

MATT: "Fucking walkers." So yeah, so you guys continue your path now. Here the weather is not too harsh. Heading northward, following the tracks, Dagen has a very strong lead on the tracks he left behind. They're not trying to cover them by any means. But nevertheless, you're a little late in the day, but let's go ahead and roll to see if anything transpires today. Who wants to roll?

LIAM: I think maybe you rolled last.

TALIESIN: I rolled last.

MARISHA: Is it me? Okay.

TALIESIN: Ruin everything.

SAM: What is it, a ten?

MATT: A d20.

TRAVIS: "Ruin everything."

TALIESIN: I'm counting on you.

MARISHA: Don't say that! Don't count on me! 19!

SAM: Hey.

TRAVIS: That's the worst one.

TALIESIN: Weirdly, the higher it goes, the worse it is.

MARISHA: Yeah, it's-- Yeah.

LAURA: Possibly.

MATT: Roll a d8 for me.

ALL: Oh!

TRAVIS: Oh, boy. What the fuck, Marisha?

SAM: Good job.

LIAM: Great.

SAM: Maybe it's to see how many gems we discovered.

LIAM: As if there's not enough going on today.

MARISHA: Seven.

TALIESIN: Knew it.

LIAM: Oh, that's the worst one!

TRAVIS: Second from the top.

TALIESIN: Knew it.

MATT: The weather begins to grow harsher. (groaning) (laughter)

MARISHA: Why, though?!

MATT: At a certain point, Dagen shouts out, "I see something ahead!"

MARISHA: No, you don't!

MATT: "No, I do. I very plainly see something ahead."

MARISHA: No!

MATT: "I think it might be your party. Maybe." And you see, as he comes up on the hill, his grinding wheels bringing them up.

MARISHA: They're all dead.

LAURA: Yeah!

SAM: End of campaign.

MATT: "Whatever this is, it didn't come to a positive conclusion," and he sleds off this hill and as you begin to follow behind you can see that there are a number of bodies scattered a little ways off.

MARISHA: Another altercation? Oh boy.

TALIESIN: I'm going to carefully keep an eye out for what's around this thing. It feels very trappy to me.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: It's trappy.

SAM: (funny voice) Hi, I'm Trappy.

MATT: Make a perception check.

LIAM: Don't forget to check for traps.

TRAVIS: Don't pay any attention to me.

TALIESIN: 21.

MATT: You don't see anything at the moment of issue. It is getting darker. The light is beginning to fade. From the sky above, night does begin to loom. But as the snowfall begins to increase, the wind begins to blow a bit, you glance forward and see that this group of bodies is not the Tomb Takers that you are pursuing. In fact, at this glance, they are long frozen. At least the bodies appear to be. There is a flair of ice across the skin and they are still in the snow, partially covered, and elements of bodies, like limbs, stuck in rigor mortis in this frozen state poking through.

LIAM: Oh, closer look, closer look.

LAURA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Detect undead just for fun.

MATT: Okay. You want to make a--

LIAM: Yeah, I want to see if I can ascertain what kind of a group they were, if they've got anything interesting on them.

MATT: Make an investigation check.

LIAM: I am a thief.

TRAVIS: Detect undead, you said?

TALIESIN: Yeah.

LIAM: 16.

MATT: All right, 16. You find actually some money. About 15 platinum. 341 gold. You find a diamond worth 250 gold pieces.

TRAVIS: Yo!

TALIESIN: Winner winner.

TRAVIS: Clutch.

SAM: Is that enough? Does it have to be 300?

TRAVIS: Does that do one of the things?

MARISHA: But you can, like, add to it, right?

SAM: Can you glue two diamonds together?

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah!

LAURA: I don't think that's quite how it works.

TALIESIN: But diamond powder, on the other hand--

LAURA: Diamond powder we can use for other things, yes.

LIAM: The diamond worth how much?

MATT: 250 gold.

LIAM: I just pass that off to you.

LAURA: Oh.

MATT: And a small chunk of blue material, not too dissimilar from what you saw the Tomb Takers leave with.

LAURA: (gasps)

LIAM: Oh, interesting.

MARISHA: Wait, what?

LAURA: The blue was, like, one of the threshold crests crushed.

LIAM: -- piece of what was in the ceiling.

MATT: What were you doing?

TALIESIN: Detect undead.

MATT: Detect undead. You get, of the six bodies that are there, six faint, undead sources from inside the frozen corpses.

TALIESIN: Yeah, they're still kicking around.

SAM: What?

LIAM: Oh, interesting.

SAM: Maybe we should leave?

LIAM: Well, they're not doing anything. And I knock on one of their heads.

MATT: As you're finished looking, you look up at the frozen body that's there in the snow that you finished breaking off the mostly frozen packs at their side, you can see the eyes. One of them (ice cracking) looks towards you.

LIAM: Oh, hello.

MATT: "(gurgling)"

LIAM: Yeah. Life is pretty rough.

MATT: He's just looking at you with the one eye.

LIAM: Oh, bubbe. (patting) You can't use this anymore, thank you. Let's just walk faster. We're faster than them.

TRAVIS: But do we want to ask where that material came from? Maybe they found their own threshold crest and now Lucien's group has it?

TALIESIN: Probably not very talkative at this point.

TRAVIS: Can we kill them and then ask them?

MARISHA: (laughing) Yeah.

TALIESIN: Once they're undead, it's-- I don't know if that's really a thing you want to mess with.

TRAVIS: All right, fair.

TALIESIN: I don't want to.

MARISHA: I'm still going to pick-- can I pick-- wait, did someone do that already? Picked up the piece of threshold?

TRAVIS: Oh, I think Caleb has it.

MARISHA: You did? Okay, okay, okay, good.

MATT: There's a very faint blue glow you can see emanating from inside the throat of one of them.

ASHLEY: Blue glow?

LAURA: Ooh, like they ate some of it?

LIAM: Inside the throat?

MATT: One of them you see the mouth is frozen open a bit and you can this very faint blue glow on the inside.

MARISHA: Oh, well let's go for that.

LIAM: Oh, yeah. I start prying on the jaw.

MARISHA: Yeah, I reach in.

TRAVIS: I think they're still moving.

MARISHA: Yeah, I think so,. too.

MATT: Well, you reach in...

LAURA: Oh, no. Why would you...?

MATT: Your hand immediately turns extremely cold. I need you to make a constitution saving throw for me.

MARISHA: Super cold!

SAM: Oh no!

LAURA: This is so dumb. (laughter)

TRAVIS: I do a swan dive!

MARISHA: Okay, 15.

MATT: 15, okay. You pull back and your hand is numb. Like it is just-- we're talking funny bone, sitting on it for an hour, bloodless numb. There was nothing to grab. It just felt like this cold, empty space in its throat. You didn't sense a source of the glow. But you see some of the other bodies now. You can see between the teeth also this blue glow beginning to slightly--

MARISHA: Maybe we should just go. I don't think it's a thing.

MATT: -- brighten within their visible orifices.

LIAM: We'll check this out later.

TALIESIN: Yeah, we're going.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: Yeah.

LIAM: Quick walking.

MATT: Dagen's like, "Are you satisfied? Let's fucking go."

LIAM: Yeah. Power walk, people.

MATT: All right. So you continue on for the next hour and a half or so before nightfall hits. It is pitch black and the weather has worsened. Dagen's sitting here going, "I mean, I can make a camp, but do you still have that pretty--?"

LIAM: Oh no, Dagen, Dagen, Dagen, we're not going to do that.

SAM: At least wait and make sure that they're making camp. We should get eyes on-- I mean, are we within eyeshot of Lucien's party?

MATT: Not eyeshot yet, but you're following the path.

SAM: Let's follow until they stop.

MARISHA: I agree.

MATT: "Okay."

LAURA: How would we know?

SAM: They'll light a fire, I assume.

MARISHA: What if they don't stop?

TALIESIN: Or don't need to.

SAM: Then we'll go up and look.

LAURA: I could just scry on them.

SAM: We're not enemies. Sure, it's going to be dark, but sure.

LAURA: It only takes a few minutes.

LIAM: Yeah, I think you should.

LAURA: Okay, I'm going to scry. On... Cree.

MATT: On Cree, okay.

LAURA: Wait, wait, wait. Before I do that, I'm going to cast Enhance Ability on myself for perception checks. on myself for perception checks.

MATT: Okay. All righty. And so then you sit down for a second. Let me go ahead and check one thing for the scry. Okay, yep. As you all are walking through the snow a bit, you tell everyone stop for a moment.

LAURA: Stop for a moment.

MATT: You begin to prepare your spell, bringing out various spells that are required and as you concentrate and complete the casting of the scrying spell, you feel the arms of the Traveler reach under your shoulders from behind and lift your consciousness from you for a moment. You see dark snow, lightless, black cold. And you can sense the cold, but it doesn't make you cold. It's just acknowledging the temperature. A little ways ahead, you catch sight of a small fire tucked into a hill where a portion of it's been dug out. And there, you can see the troop of the five of them all gathered around this flame, staring into it. There you see Cree is currently in the process of going through materials in her pouch. Pack, if you will. There's not much conversation at the moment. They're just getting themselves ready for a night's rest.

LAURA: Do they look like they're cold?

MATT: Right now up against the fire? Cree doesn't appear to be that freezing. But they're pretty close to the flames. Interesting point, the flames are there, but there's not-- what you do see at the outskirts, there's no kindle, there's no thing that is catching, there's just fire being produced between them all.

LAURA: There's no conversation happening?

MATT: Not at the moment.

SAM: They're just getting ready for bed.

MATT: About a moment passes before Cree's eyes fade over, red. And the head turns up in the direction of your particular scrying position before you hear both Lucien and Cree's voice simultaneously overlapping come through to you. "So you're keeping up well enough."

LAURA: Can you hear me? Yes? Can you hear me? I don't know you can hear me. Probably can.

MATT: Not reacting to your voice at all. Just seems to be peering. "I hope you're staying close. There's a lot to see when we get there and it'd be a real shame if you petered off the trail. I'm curious what you want out of this. I understand that you all lie with such confidence. I admire that. It's gotten me through, well, most of my previous life. But there are still challenges with a mortal body. Such as the cold." He just stares back at you. Is there anything in particular you want to do or look for while you're scrying?

LAURA: Um. No, I don't think so.

SAM: We got what we came for.

LAURA: I guess-- Do they have any emotion, any of the other four? Do they seem like they talk when Lucien's not talking through them? Do they talk to each other?

MATT: Make a perception check.

LAURA: Ooh, I get advantage! (groans) 12.

MATT: 12? You hear mutterings of conversation happening outside of the one that is currently being put in your direction.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: So you get a sense that it isn't, like, one unified consciousness controlling five bodies, but the minute that Cree/Lucien begins to acknowledge you, the rest of the conversation falls silent.

LAURA: All right. Guess that's everything then.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: Did you get a sense for how far away they are?

LAURA: They're a little ways ahead.

SAM: Should we catch up a little bit more, so we're, like, you know, a few hundred meters away before we make our--

LAURA: I think we're not that far, you know?

SAM: Okay.

LAURA: He did say that it would be a shame if we left the trail. It almost seemed like-- I don't know.

MARISHA: He wants us to follow him?

LAURA: What if it's reverse psychology?

SAM: Yeah, keep your enemies closer?

TRAVIS: Keeps us exactly where he--

TALIESIN: Keeps us from looking at any of the other sites.

LIAM: They hold all the cards and they're toying with us, and we either play along to their game or we fuck off and do something totally else.

SAM: I feel like if we're going to make camp, we should be within an eyeshot of them.

TRAVIS: I agree.

SAM: That way, when we wake up, we don't have to scry to see if they've left already.

TRAVIS: Especially if there's a fire. We should be able to see that from a reasonable distance.

MARISHA: Let's do it.

LAURA: I mean, I know what to look for. That hill that they're dug into.

MATT: "Okay, let's keep pushing on then for a bit, just to keep an eye out along with mine. It's always good to have more eyes on the horizon."

SAM: I'm watching.

LAURA: If we run into anything, I'm out of spells, so I won't be able to help us very much. Only got a couple left.

SAM: Beau, do you want your goggles back?

MARISHA: Yeah, I do.

SAM: All right.

MARISHA: Thank you.

MATT: All right, perception check?

TALIESIN: Yep.

SAM: So good!

TRAVIS: Do you want anyone to assist you?

SAM: What? Who said that?

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: What you got?

TALIESIN: 30.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

MATT: Actually, we would be at disadvantage, because you do not have darkvision, and it is in the middle of the night, so one more time.

TRAVIS: Do you want some assistance?

SAM: We got four party members that don't have darkvision? Is that right?

TALIESIN: Damn it. Too late.

SAM: That's crazy.

TALIESIN: 14.

MATT: 14, okay.

LIAM: We have Light, though.

SAM: Yeah.

MATT: About another 45 or so minutes, eventually you begin to pick up the sight of a tiny, distant flame.

LAURA: There it is.

MATT: Getting close enough to a point of comfort, you can see some movement across the fire. So at least you know that it is a campsite, and based on what you've seen, fairly close to the one that you saw in your scry.

TALIESIN: We'll definitely lose them if we take a point of-- if we are exhausted tomorrow. So I think camping is a good idea.

TALIESIN: The dome or the?

TALIESIN: No.

LIAM: Not the dome.

SAM: The hotel--

LIAM: It's so cold. I shove the wand down into the snow, and spend a minute opening a portal to our abode.

SAM: Let's do it. Jester, you can still send messages from inside his hotel?

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: All right. You all make your way into the tower, prepare yourselves for an evening's rest. What would you like to do while you're there for the night?

SAM: Hot chocolate.

ASHLEY and MARISHA: Hot chocolate.

ASHLEY: Hot chocolate in the fire, in the library? There is a fire there, right? A fireplace?

LIAM: Fires all over the place.

TALIESIN: He's finally out of earshot, too, we can speak freely.

LIAM: Yes. Well, probably. Probably.

TALIESIN: Probably.

LIAM: Probably. I pull a sash in the corner of the entry hall and a cat pops out of the little archway hole. Gretchen, um, would you make lots of pies? I'd like to have shepherd's pie for everyone for dinner, and then also a variety of dessert pies as well. Okay? Hot, please.

MATT: (mrrows) One darts off into the wall and vanishes.

LIAM: (cat noises) Okay, you want to unpack all of that? And I start to float up through.

MATT: Dagen's like, "Oh yeah, all right," (whooshes) and just starts hovering up into the upper part of the tower going, "Weee!"

TRAVIS: I'll pull Jester aside and say: You mentioned that Cree or Lucien was speaking to you directly as well?

LAURA: Yeah. It's almost like when he takes control, obviously it's like he's got full, his consciousness overwhelms the other people, you know? He was speaking to me from Cree.

TRAVIS: Does it seem like he's keying in on you in particular? I know it's you that's been scrying, but when we see someone scrying on us, we only see a representation of the spell. We don't see the person. And I'm sure that Lucien is much more important, but... I'm sure it's just coincidence, but since we're not on the sea, would you want to wear this? And I take out the Amulet of Proof Against Detection and Location. I don't know if it'll work. Caleb gave it to me because we've-- I've seemed to have a beacon on me every time we go on the open water, but we're far from water. It might provide some protection if we're going to keep checking in on him.

LAURA: I mean, it's worth a try. He's met all of us so he could potentially scry on anyone, I guess, now, but maybe it'll keep me from being seen if I scry on him. I don't know how it all works.

TRAVIS: I guess we'd find out the next time we did it.

LAURA: Yeah. Thank you.

TRAVIS: Yeah. Just in case it's not a coincidence.

LAURA: It's also creepy. He did say that he kind of knew me, right?

TRAVIS: Did he?

LAURA: When we got there, he said he hadn't met anyone except for me. The only way he would have known this is from the scriess. I never met him without the group, you know?

TRAVIS: Yes, it's what I--

LAURA: Weird. You think he sees me like a little fish eye lens, like, looking through a little ball and my face.

TRAVIS: What do you think? What does your face do when you scry?

LAURA: I don't know. You would know better than me.

TRAVIS: Very. You're just--

LAURA: Like, just open mouth? That is not flattering.

TRAVIS: Checked out.

LAURA: Next time, just do me a favor, close my jaw. I just want to look less stupid while I'm doing it, okay?

TRAVIS: I will try. It's one of Beau's favorite things, though, to watch.

LAURA: Oh, well, I guess don't take the joy away from her, then.

TRAVIS: Okay.

LAURA: Okay.

MARISHA: (whispering) I'm just tossing ball bearings.

TRAVIS: They're just hitting her lips and causing bruises, solid metal.

MATT: Cracking the teeth.

TRAVIS: Yeah! They're not blueberries. (laughs) (crack) Ugh!

LAURA: Ah! My tooth!

TRAVIS: What happened to my face while I was scrying?

LAURA: I can take off the Charm of Plant Command right now, right? Because not seeing a lot of plants around here.

TRAVIS: Not much, no, I don't think so. And, obviously, it is Caleb's, but--

LAURA: Should I ask him if it's okay?

TRAVIS: He gave it to me to use it. You seem to need it more than I do right now.

LAURA: Okay.

TRAVIS: And just be careful. I don't like the possibility of him keying in on you, or using that connection between the two of you to manipulate something. His magic seemed strange. I don't know that much, Caleb would know more, but he seems to be playing by a different set of rules.

LAURA: He really does.

TRAVIS: All right. More adventures tomorrow. What?

LAURA: How are you? I know that's a stupid question, but, you know, Avantika showed back up, and she tried to pull you under water and, you know, she's like, you guys had a thing, and it must've been weird to see her, like, kind of dead and stuff. Was it weird? You killed her again.

TRAVIS: Yeah, it was weird. It was weird, for sure. I wasn't expecting that. I'm all right. It feels like I keep trying to start newer chapters in my life and leave the old stuff behind, and then it just keeps popping up. It feels like it's hard to pursue something new when the past is not dealt with.

LAURA: Well, do we need to deal with the past?

TRAVIS: I think so. I want to. I feel like I need to close all of that before...

LAURA: Anytime you want to, I can-- I can scry, you know, I can try to search for anyone again. I know we've talked about it before, but if it would help, I could do it.

TRAVIS: Right. I actually-- I put a bounty out on... Sabian.

LAURA: When? How?

TRAVIS: Well, back on the island-- the famous bounty hunter out of Nicodranas--

LAURA: Oh.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

LAURA: Yeah. Oh!

TRAVIS: I just figured, give them a task with their mind being--

LAURA: How will you know if they find him?

TRAVIS: I think they are going to communicate by magical means?

LAURA: Do they have the ability? Should I send a message? I know them. Maybe I can send a message and be like: Hey, did you find Sabian? Should we be worried? Is Sabian dead? What's going on?

TRAVIS: Sure. Yeah.

LAURA: You want me to do it?

TRAVIS: Yeah.

LAURA: Oh, okay. Okay. All I have left is a 6th-level spell, but we're going to sleep, so I'm going to use (laughing) my 6th-level spell to send a message.

SAM: (pigeon coo) We're not going to sleep. (coos)

LAURA: What?

SAM: Okay.

TRAVIS: We're not going to sleep?

SAM: Weren't we going to call Essek and stuff? (laughter)

LAURA: I mean--

SAM: Wasn't that the whole point of this?

LAURA: I've also got a 7th-level spell.

SAM: Okay. (coos) Go ahead and do it.

LIAM: That was floated. I don't think it was decided on.

TRAVIS: It was a good idea.

LAURA: (coos) Find me later, let me know about that because I forgot. (coos)

TRAVIS: I used up all my minutes on myself, but I have to call.

MATT: (laughs)

SAM: And then he was going to call Astrid and stuff.

TRAVIS: (coos)

SAM: Okay.

LAURA: What was their name again?

TRAVIS: Oh, the bounty hunter?

LAURA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Um...

LIAM: Shamp--

SAM: Shampoo.

TRAVIS: Kotho?

LAURA: Kotho.

MATT: Kotho.

TRAVIS: Kotho.

LAURA: Nice. Okay, I'm going to send a message.

TRAVIS: Notes!

MARISHA: They work!

LAURA: To Kotho.

MARISHA: Tried and true.

LAURA: Hi, I'm here with Fjord. He hired you. Wondering if you found Sabian. What's going on there. Is he dead? Is he alive? Just... (high-pitched) let's... (very high-pitched) be!

MATT: It's the high-pitched squeak at the end that really makes it.

ASHLEY: You're like (high pitched mumbles).

MARISHA: Just someone on the verge of a panic attack.

MATT: Yep, yep. There's a brief moment before Kotho responds. "Ah. Tell Fjord indeed Sabian has been found. Acquisition will take care and time, as he resides in Darktow."

MARISHA: Oh! (whispers) We was there.

TRAVIS: We got fucking banished in less than a day!

MARISHA: A day, yeah! (laughter)

MATT: Yup.

MARISHA: But you know... Maybe that only lasts like a year, you know, like when you get caught shoplifting.

LIAM: Maybe he got there after us?

TALIESIN: Six weeks.

TRAVIS: You never know. You never know.

LIAM: Maybe the day after we left?

MARISHA: Just need turnover to happen, you know?

LAURA: Whoops.

TRAVIS: No, no, no, no, no whoops. That's great. That's great. I-- that's totally distracting, but that's great. Thank you.

LAURA: You're welcome. Well, now you know!

TRAVIS: Thank you.

LAURA: You're welcome. I'm glad I could help.

TRAVIS: That was very nice of you.

LAURA: It's just a spell. Easy to do.

TRAVIS: I will think about that all night.

LAURA: (giggles) Okay. Oh, you know who else I should call? Essek!

TRAVIS: Oh, that's true. I do believe the group was talking about--

LAURA: Yeah, maybe I should go to the group, and sit in front of the fire. We can talk to Essek.

TRAVIS: I think that's a great idea.

TRAVIS: I'll race you to the top! Up!

LAURA: Up! (laughter)

SAM: Oh my god.

TALIESIN: Irritatingly adorable.

MATT: I know, I know, right?

TALIESIN: It's just like ugh, gross.

MATT: All righty. So you guys race your way up the tower together to the rest of the group, and easy enough for you to regather, so.

LAURA: Do we need to talk to Essek?

SAM: That was one of the things we had floated doing. Why we're following for a couple of days, yeah.

LIAM: Have a seat, have some pie. Please, we can't eat all of this on our own.

LAURA: What kind of pie?

LIAM: Yes.

LAURA: (excited noise)

SAM: Is there--

MATT: "But whatever you don't finish just-- I can go ahead and take the scraps--"

SAM: Is there pecan?

MATT: "-- if you don't mind."

LIAM: Yes, yeah.

TRAVIS: Pecan chocolate pie?

LAURA: I basically make a full pie out of all different slices of pie.

SAM: Ooh, that's nice.

TRAVIS: Whoa. Yeah.

MATT: "This place is ridiculous. You know that, right?"

LIAM: Yeah, but I'm making for a lot of lost time sleeping on roads and stuff. So it balances out.

MATT: "I'd say yeah. I guess so am I now, huh?"

LAURA: He was--

LIAM: Yeah.

LAURA: -- so stinky. Like, he was just so stinky. Like, when we first met him, like, he'd been on the road for a long time.

LIAM: Now the stink is just on the inside.

MATT: "Mmm. I can see that on you. Crazy thing, I'm usually allergic, but none of these cats seem to bother me."

SAM and LAURA: Oh!

LIAM: Oh, yeah. Well, these are special. This is the specialist (whooshes). Frumpkin on the table. Frumpkin, go say hello to Dagen, please.

MATT: "Hi, Frumpkin. What makes you so special?"

LIAM: Frumpkin vanishes and then reappears on Dagen's shoulder.

MATT: "Oh!"

LIAM: And then begins to purr and do kitty biscuits on his shoulder.

MATT: "Ahh!"

LIAM: No, no, just let it happen.

MATT: "Okay." (laughter)

LIAM: It hurts at first, but then it starts to feel good.

MATT: "Oh, inch to the left. Ooh. Hoo hoo."

TRAVIS: That doesn't make your nose go crazy?

MATT: "Weirdly, no!"

TRAVIS: Yeah, no, me neither.

SAM: Maybe it's psychosomatic or something.

TRAVIS: ♪ Addict, insane ♪ (laughter)

LAURA: Can you have your cats bring a little mini pie that's full of weasel food?

LIAM: Weasel food specifically?

LAURA: A weasel food pie?

SAM: That's a great idea.

ASHLEY: What do weasels eat?

TALIESIN: Other than weasel food.

LAURA: Nuts?

SAM: Do they? (laughter)

TALIESIN: What have you been feeding this weasel?!

TRAVIS: They got sharp fucking teeth! Holy shit!

LAURA: And bugs! And bugs and bugs.

TALIESIN: Sprinkle's been throwing up.

TRAVIS: Shitting literal bricks.

MARISHA: He's eight pounds.

TRAVIS: He's like a bag of marbles. He's like, "Ugh!"

LIAM: I pick up a-- (laughter)

LIAM: I pick up little brass bell on the table and ring it and a small spectral cat comes into the room and (tiny step noises) up to the table. Costia, would you please go and get me the smallest pie, put nuts in it. What else?

LAURA: Bugs. Don't put nuts. I don't think nuts are-- Maybe just some bugs?

LIAM: So just bugs.

LAURA: Bug pie.

LIAM: Cooked-- cooked bugs?

TRAVIS: Yasha might--

LAURA: Yasha, what's the best? Cooked bugs or raw bugs that are--

ASHLEY: Well, you know, I would imagine they probably want them raw.

LAURA: Raw bugs.

ASHLEY: You know, they don't cook their bugs in the wild, but I also have a feeling that-- maybe they do. I don't know weasel life very well. Maybe, um, maybe also get some, some-- yeah, bugs would be good.

LIAM: All right.

SAM: What were you going to suggest?

LIAM: Hold on. Hold on. Costia--

ASHLEY: I feel like they eat other, smaller rodents.

LAURA: Oh!

TRAVIS: Yeah, like mice or--

LAURA: Oh, maybe like some mice in the pie?

ASHLEY: You could do a little mice pie, you know?

LIAM: Let's try this. Costia, get two small pies, okay? And if you need to ask Vanya to help carry the other one, get Vanya and the both of you bring in two pies. One of them just fill in a cooked pie crust with bugs, and then the other one, just do like-- mince some rabbit.

LAURA: Ooh!

MATT: (affirmative cat noises)

TRAVIS: Yeah.

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: Heads off to get your rabbit and bug pies.

MARISHA: Does the cat look at me and go-- as it goes out, like you just did?

MATT: Yeah.

MARISHA: Awesome. (laughter)

MARISHA: That's my cat!

TRAVIS: The over it cat.

MARISHA: I claim that one, yeah!

TRAVIS: That asshole's mine! (laughter)

MARISHA: The can't be bothered cat.

ASHLEY: Can you actually make two of those?

MATT: (affirmative meow)

ASHLEY: Yeah.

LIAM: Nina, go and help them.

MATT: (a meow that sounds like "Okay") (laughter)

TRAVIS: My cat is in a full hazmat suit, so it doesn't affect me. (laughter)

LIAM: Just put Armor of Agathys around the cats, always.

TRAVIS: Leave it there and walk away.

ASHLEY: (meowing)

MATT: They retrieve the pies.

LAURA: Sprinkle! Treats for you!

MATT: (snarling)

LIAM: Oh, this is-- we do a test. Which one does Sprinkle like?

LAURA: Sprinkle, which pie do you like?

MATT: (sniffing, grunts) (chomps) and just digs into the bunny pie.

LAURA: Oh, the bunny pie!

TALIESIN: Just to be safe, detect undead. (laughter)

TALIESIN: It's a fair question!

MATT: No, it totally is. You do not detect undead.

TALIESIN: Weird.

LIAM: When Sprinkle ignores the insect pie, I just slide it over towards Yasha at the table.

ASHLEY: (gobbling)

TALIESIN: I was absolutely within my rights there.

ASHLEY: Would anyone like to try? I mean, I feel like a bug pie is just such a delicacy.

TRAVIS: Mm. Mm-mm.

ASHLEY: No?

MATT: I'll go in on it. Yeah, sure.

ASHLEY: Would you like to try a little bit?

MATT: "I'll take a piece."

SAM: Oh, great.

ASHLEY: Have a little bite.

MARISHA: Yeah, give me a bite. That bug that I had in your bedroom wasn't too bad, so.

ASHLEY: Yeah, it's not too bad! I think people are scared of it, but it's--

MATT: "It's got to nice crunch to it. Just got in my teeth a little bit."

TRAVIS: Oh boy.

ASHLEY: It's a little sticky.

MARISHA: Kind of like an almond-y taste.

MATT: "Yeah!"

LIAM: I will stick to the apple.

MARISHA: It's good.

TRAVIS: Uh-huh.

MATT: "You're missing out, friend. Just saying."

LIAM: Mm. Pumpkin.

SAM: With sour cream, couple walnuts?

TRAVIS: Sour cream?

LAURA: Mm. Mm-hmm.

SAM: So good. Little tang.

TRAVIS: Never had it.

LIAM: Okay, now that we're all relatively stuffed, do we want to talk about our day?

LAURA: I mean, what's there to talk about?

TALIESIN: Well--

TRAVIS: The plan, though I think we're going to reach out, right?

SAM: Yeah, so folks that we could reach out to are Essek, maybe he'll know someone who has information about these places. Or we talked about calling someone in the Assembly? Or Astrid?

MARISHA: Yeah, the Assembly gets dicey, 'cause we're going to have to like lie real good.

LAURA: Yeah.

MARISHA: Why wouldn't it be Vess that reaches out?

LAURA: And I got the one spell left today.

SAM: Oh, just the one.

MARISHA: Okay.

LAURA: You know, we've been doing a lot.

TALIESIN: I think Essek's a good call.

TRAVIS: And just for like an overarching strategy, are we at some point going to take Vess' body back to the Cerberus Assembly and be like, "She died a long time ago, here's proof, just trying to clear the record"? Or are we going to drop her out the window and say she died out in the wilderness by herself?

LIAM: Well, this is a possible positive of contacting Astrid.

LAURA: Hey, um, you guys?

MATT: "Interesting point--"

LAURA: Guess what?

MATT: "I just was real curious is, so I assume Vess isn't going to meet us there cause she's dead?"

TRAVIS: (blows raspberries)

LIAM: Yes, Dagen, you are within the circle of trust now. This is a very complicated situation.

TRAVIS: Oh boy.

MATT: "Wait a second, wait a second."

TRAVIS: Oh boy.

MATT: "(chuckles)"

TRAVIS: Who's got the Modify?

LAURA: Nope. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Oh boy. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Whoops!

MARISHA: Shit.

TALIESIN: We may have a bottle of ether in somebody's bag.

MARISHA: Yeah. (laughs)

TALIESIN: Go to sleep.

LAURA: So here's the thing, Dagen--

TRAVIS: Those histamines fucked me up, man.

LAURA: (stammering) Those--

LIAM: Just keep eating pie and listen to Jester.

LAURA: Those people that came out of the ruins before us--

MATT: "Yeah?"

LAURA: -- that we were like, "Hey, hide from them, 'cause they're scary people"?

MATT: "Yeah?"

LAURA: They sort of snuck in to the town and they killed-- they killed her. So we-- because we were hired to protect her, sort of, we were hired, so we decided, "Oh, you know what we should do is we should go after them and make them pay." So that's what we're doing now. (voice wavering) We're following them. (laughter)

MATT: He's just looking real intent at you, his mouth still half-encrusted with bug pie and other pies caught in is black beard as he goes, "Oh."

LAURA: But you'll still be paid for all your time!

MATT: "Yeah, I assume."

LAURA: And--

MATT: "You just-- And you didn't wish to share this information with me?"

SAM: We--

MATT: "Now I'm an accomplice in the murder of a member of the Cerberus Assembly."

ALL: No!

LAURA: You're not an accomplice! Because we're trying to clear-- We're trying to-- to--

TRAVIS: No, keep going, you've got it.

LAURA: We're figuring out how they killed her, we're going to bring those criminals to-- to justice, and that is why, you know, we're sort of-- we're sort of a detective agency at the same time. We solve mysteries.

SAM: We do. We're very good.

LIAM: It's definitely bad, and apologies, we were improvising in the moment because it is obviously a very bad situation.

MATT: "Yeah."

LIAM: What we are discussing now is how to minimize the fallout from that problem, so--

MATT: "Well--"

LIAM: One of the reasons, I had considered contacting Astrid and Eadwulf was because we could try to cover our tracks, pretend it never happened. Not doing a very good job here. Or--

TRAVIS: I just see Matt. My RP sucks. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Right next to me.

LIAM: No one in the Assembly is a very big fan of each other. We could just try to be straightforward with my... friends and let them know what has happened.

MARISHA: Why would we tell Eadwulf and Astrid? Why wouldn't we immediately tell Ludinus or another high-ranking member of the Assembly?

LIAM: To get some help here. We need muscle.

MARISHA: I have a deep feeling they're not good at keeping secrets. If they were to be departed by one of their higher-ranking officers to come and help us, that would be one thing, but going to them first seems like misstep.

LAURA: How, how, how are you feeling, Dagen?

LIAM: Well, they know that we're with--

LAURA: About it all?

MARISHA: Yeah, what was he-- but you were about to say something.

MATT: "I don't know half of what you just said. People and stuff. All I do know is you don't fuck with the Cerberus Assembly."

MARISHA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Ooh, yeah.

MATT: "Whew..."

MARISHA: Yeah, no, we know, man, that's kind of why we didn't tell you, we didn't want to, like, put you in an awkward position.

MATT: "Yeah, no, I kind of wish I didn't hear that."

TALIESIN: I mean, if it's any consolation, I had completely forgotten that you didn't know.

ASHLEY: And we also have been carrying her dead body with us to return at some point.

MATT: "Well, that makes it right as rain!"

ASHLEY: No, I realize that sounds worse.

SAM: We also wanted to maybe dump it in the lava, maybe.

ASHLEY: Dump it in--

MATT: "That is probably your best bet."

SAM: Okay!

MATT: "And just keep going north and never go back. Just live up here. I can show you ways. This is not comfortable."

TRAVIS: Just live up here? (laughter)

MATT: "Oh boy. This is a right mess--"

TRAVIS: Don't sweat it!

MATT: "-- you got yourself into, Dagen."

TRAVIS: I push some of the shepherd's pie over. It's going to be fine. Don't worry about it.

LIAM: I think, though the longer we hide it, the worse it would be with us and the Assembly and perhaps letting them know that she was murdered, not by us, but by (sighs) our old friend--

TALIESIN: I don't know if that's the call for tonight, though.

LIAM: No, not tonight.

TALIESIN: But yeah, I agree. That's a--

LIAM: I just know that it will get worse the more time elapses.

TRAVIS: I think I agree as well. If we just leave her here, the question is like, how did we survive and not her? I thought we were watching her.

LAURA: Plus, you know, I have the ability to make people tell the truth. I'm sure a lot of other people in the Assembly have that ability as well.

MATT: "Wish you had the ability to fucking wipe my mind right now."

TALIESIN: Working on it.

LAURA: Do you want me to?

MATT: "Can you?"

TALIESIN: Uh.

LAURA: I mean, I can.

TALIESIN: You can?

MATT: "Then, if you wouldn't mind, I don't want to know about this. Culpable deniability. Look, your business is your own, but this puts me in a weird position. Either that or I'm going to have to ask for a lot more money."

TRAVIS: I understand. We don't have-- I mean, we have a lot to give, but--

LIAM: Yeah, that's true because we actually-- flies out of my pockets.

TRAVIS: Yep.

LIAM: So, ignorance is bliss.

TRAVIS: Yeah, I'm all for it.

LAURA: Okay. Tell you what. I will definitely do that for you. Here's the thing, though. Do we want to do that tonight? Or do we want to talk to Essek? Because, regardless, I can make it disappear tomorrow for you or the next day, and you still won't know.

TALIESIN: That way you won't have to keep remembering every time that we forget that you don't know. And we will.

LIAM: Just one bad night of sleep. Or two.

MATT: "(unhappy sigh)"

SAM: First thing in the morning? Wake up, have a coffee, and wipe your memory, maybe?

LAURA: How does that work? Because if, like, the memory sticks, and he remembers that he remembered it the next day--

TRAVIS: Uh-oh.

LAURA: How does that work?

SAM: We'll find out!

LIAM: You've done it before, though, have you not?

LAURA: Well, yeah, but that was instantaneous, you know what I mean? But, I mean, I have the ability to do it from days before, so obviously...

SAM: It'll work.

TALIESIN: I think you can just cover it with something, maybe. Just be like, "Oh, you've been feeling sick."

LAURA: It's like a chain reaction.

TALIESIN: For a day. Yeah. Oh god.

LAURA: Yeah, yeah. Yeah.

TALIESIN: You've got a stomach thing.

MATT: "Well, regardless, this is a fine mess you're in."

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: "Um. Let's just keep traveling north and hope for the best. Maybe it'll take a while for them to figure it out. I don't know."

LIAM: We'll figure it out as we go, Dagen, that's what we do.

MARISHA: Yeah, don't worry about it.

LIAM: We're the Mighty Nein.

MATT: "Okay."

MARISHA: It's not your problem to worry about.

MATT: "Okay."

LAURA: We'll keep you safe, Dagen.

MATT: "All right. (chewing) (with a mouthful of food) I'm going to go to bed."

SAM: Okay. Good night.

TALIESIN: Fair.

MATT: "Up! Wee!" (laughter) Goes and makes his way to bed.

TRAVIS: I totally forgot he was here. I'm so sorry.

TALIESIN: I forgot he didn't know.

TRAVIS: I just, he was so familiar. I thought we were cool.

MARISHA: So Caduceus, when can you talk to Vess DeRogna again?

TALIESIN: Two more days. Two more days.

SAM: And is there anyone in the world that we know who might have any information about these locations? A2, Aeor.

TRAVIS: Well, Essek.

SAM: Want to try Essek?

TRAVIS: We could try. It doesn't alert the Cerberus Assembly in the same way as Astrid does.

TALIESIN: The other thing is have we have we talked to Essek about Nonagon or any of that yet?

TRAVIS: I can't remember. I don't think--

TALIESIN: I don't think we have.

LAURA: It's a lot of conversation for 25 words.

TRAVIS: Let's just hit up the Bright Queen! Take a big shot.

TALIESIN: I think we should let him know--

TRAVIS: Nope!

TALIESIN: -- that we're in a lot and that maybe we need to figure out a way to have a longer conversation and we can't do it on this end.

LAURA: Okay. I don't know how we'll get there. We can't teleport here.

TALIESIN: No, but maybe we can talk somehow.

LAURA: Okay.

TALIESIN: Quick, quick question before we-- What are the goals? I know that the plans are amorphous, but, like, what are we-- what's the good outcome here?

SAM: Well, I mean, I assume we all think that whatever the Lucien's doing is probably bad, right? So I think that the goal is to stop it?

TALIESIN: So that's a goal, but it doesn't seem like-- I feel like that's a goal, I don't know if that's the goal. I feel like everybody's a little all over the place. I don't know. You're all--

LIAM: We're a bit thrown.

TALIESIN: You're all thrown.

TRAVIS: It was kind of outside the rule book when someone lives, dies, lives again, dies, and then lives a third time from the first version

SAM: Although, we have seen some of that in our travels, right? In Xhorhas, we learned about them having souls that can jump into each other's bodies when they die and stuff? It's not the same thing.

LAURA: Connected to the Luxon in some way.

TALIESIN: That's kind of my question is-- From the second that you found out that your friend was back, was the goal to stop him from doing something evil? Was that the plan from day one?

TRAVIS: Ye--

LAURA: No.

MARISHA: Well, I think the original plan was that there's still this brewing tension between the Empire and the Dynasty and both sides seem to believe that there is divinity eliminating magic.

TALIESIN: I'm just talking about your friend. Like, we went somewhere to see if he was still in the ground and he wasn't, and then this happened.

LIAM: I think his thread is coming up alongside us here, because the reason we came was to spend time with this dead woman and learn a little bit about what she was doing and what the Empire is doing. What the Empire is doing is at odds with the Dynasty, yet again. Even though that we've achieved peace, both sides are in some sort of arms race for whatever is buried up here. And we don't want the war to continue. We are trying to keep a lasting peace. Now she's dead. We're not going to learn too much from her. We might in a couple of days.

TALIESIN: I was under the assumption when we first started heading this direction, well, when we found out that we weren't alone heading in this direction, that the goal was that you wanted your friend back. And I don't know if that goal has actually changed, I just don't know if anybody's talking about it. And I'm a little worried.

LAURA: I feel like that goal is disappearing.

MARISHA: I never had any illusions that we were going to get him back.

TRAVIS: I don't know if that's what I want, either. It almost feels like a betrayal of something that passed.

TALIESIN: Maybe, but I'm just pointing out that if you wanted to know how to do it, in two days, we could ask the person who did.

LAURA: That's true.

ASHLEY: I would love to have my friend back.

TALIESIN: I don't know if it would work, but I feel like everyone's been running in different directions.

LAURA: Honestly, when we were going into that ruin, I didn't know why we were walking in.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

LAURA: I mean, we were hired to help Vess. She's dead. It's done. We could have just walked away.

LIAM: Well, I am worried that whatever she was picking at here, and whatever Lucien is picking at here, and supposedly the Dynasty is as well, he's going to rip apart the tenuous peace that has been achieved. Whatever it is is not good. And we could contact either side. Obviously, I have ties on one, but I don't think either side wants whatever Lucien is chasing. And we're just trying to figure out what it is. We have theories. We've had visions, even.

MARISHA: That's my thing is I feel like we're all forgetting about this huge piece is that we all had this shared vision of a flying city in another dimension. I'm... not one for a believer in a shared vision is that common.

TALIESIN: I'm not common, but it's interesting that just things have been all over the place. I don't know.

MARISHA: In what way? Because I feel like everything is converging. It's been all over the place, and now it feels like it's all coming to a head.

TALIESIN: I'm not talking about outside. I'm just talking about everybody in here.

LIAM: Oh, one hundred percent agreed. We do not have a cohesive plan. At all. Not at all. We have, not for days, not since she died. We knew what we were doing when she was alive. As soon as she was snuffed out, so was our purpose. I don't know what we're doing, but I know what I am afraid of. And I know that we're being pulled towards this thing and I have both very real world concerns, and then we have fate.

TALIESIN: It's very weird.

MARISHA: Destiny? What is it?

TALIESIN: Fate. I like fate, but--

MARISHA: Call it whatever you want.

TALIESIN: So the Dynasty is a pit we haven't dug into yet. Who knows what's there.

LAURA: I'm going to pull out my tarot cards.

SAM: Ooh!

TALIESIN: Bold.

MARISHA: (whispers) Give us a sign.

LAURA: Okay.

TALIESIN: See if I can guess which one.

SAM: Who are you going to read? Yourself?

LAURA: I'm just going to pull out a card and look to our future.

SAM: Okay, cool.

LAURA: Give us a sign. Oh, interesting. I pull out the card that says The Magician, The Tinker. I pull out the card that says The Magician, The Tinker.

SAM: The Magician and Tinker?

LAURA: Mm-hmm.

TALIESIN: Which one was facing up?

LAURA: Oh! Well.

TALIESIN: The number should tell you. Oh, no.

LAURA: No, I got to roll.

TALIESIN: Got to roll, sorry. Forgot the system.

LAURA: The Magician. So Molly drew this card for you, Caleb. It looks like you. You're sitting in the room and all around you are strange orbiting lights. Veth is on the other side of the card, though. Well, Nott is. Isn't that interesting?

SAM: It is weird!

LAURA: Molly drew cards for all of us.

ASHLEY: He did?

LAURA: Maybe that just means that we follow the magic. What does your gut tell you, Caleb?

LIAM: I've been trying to make sense of everything that's happened in the last few weeks every day and I am not seeing it. But I know that we're supposed to go where Molly is. Otherwise we would not have seen the things that we've seen. We wouldn't be the Mighty Nein. So the real world exists behind us waiting for us to return.

LAURA: Let's just start our own nation up here. Maybe Dagen is right.

TRAVIS: Our own nation?

LAURA: Yeah. We'll just start over.

MARISHA: We already have a resort town with a bar named after me in Rumblecusp.

LAURA: Exactly.

MARISHA: Let's go--

LAURA: We don't have to go anywhere, we--

TRAVIS: Franchises!

MARISHA: Ah.

LAURA: We need to open the bar here.

MARISHA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Summer, winter.

TALIESIN: An ice bar.

MARISHA: An ice bar? Yeah.

LAURA: Honestly, this may sound stupid, but wherever you guys want to go, I'll be there.

SAM: That does sound stupid, Jester. (laughter)

LAURA: I just don't have a strong pull anywhere, you know? I just want to do what do you guys want to do. I want to do with you.

SAM: I'm joking. It's the rhubarb that's making me silly. I feel the exact same way. As long as we're together, I feel like we're going to be doing the right thing. And that means being with Molly, too. Even if he's not Molly anymore. It means staying with him and seeing if there's some part of him still inside.

LIAM: You all feel in your gut that what he's doing here is not good.

MARISHA: Mm-hmm.

LAURA: Yeah.

ASHLEY: (uncertain noise) Yes. (laughter)

LAURA: It's dangerous and powerful. And it's going to fuck up the world if he completes it.

SAM: Well.

LIAM: Well, somebody who has to help the Empire and the Dynasty. Might as well well be this group of schmucks.

TRAVIS: Essek?

LAURA: Oh, right. I will send a message to Essek.

SAM: Well--

MARISHA: What are we going to say?

SAM: We only have one thing that we can say to him, right?

TALIESIN: One word.

LAURA: Nonagon, right?

SAM: But, like, what is the one piece of information he could give us in 25 words that would help us the most?

LAURA: Honestly, I don't know. It's not like he can send a coordinate. I guess he could.

TRAVIS: Is he aware of any heavy Dynasty activity in Foren or Aeor?

TALIESIN: He might've known about that group that just got slaughtered.

MARISHA: Maybe you just say, "We're headed to Aeor."

SAM: What do we need to know?

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MARISHA: We need help.

LAURA: Okay.

TALIESIN: The Nonagon is here.

MARISHA: The Nonagon is here. We're looking for threshold crests.

LAURA: Okay. Ugh, okay, that's a lot a lot. Okay.

SAM: And you poopin'.

LAURA: Hi! We're heading to Aeor. The Nonagon is here. Can you help us? We're looking for threshold crests. Do you have any knowledge? Huh? (laughter) That's the worst message I've ever sent!

MARISHA: I think it was pretty fucking great.

ASHLEY: No, it's not.

SAM: It was four ideas in there!

ASHLEY: You got a lot in there.

LIAM: It was concise.

ASHLEY: You got a lot in there.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: Not but a moment later you get a response from Essek. "Jester, it has been a bit. That was a lot. But Aeor, interesting. I'm at a Vermus outpost to its east."

SAM: Wait, what?

MARISHA: Oh my god! (gasping)

MARISHA: He's at the what outpost?

TRAVIS: Vermust outpost?

LAURA: Avermous, avermus?

TRAVIS: He's not done, he's not done!

MATT: That's all you had at the moment.

ASHLEY: Oh.

LIAM: Ah-ver-mist?

MATT: No, Vermus.

TRAVIS: A4 is to the east.

LAURA: Dagen! Dagen! Do you know where a Vermus outpost is?

SAM: He's asleep! We got to go wake him up!

LAURA: Oh, shit!

TALIESIN: We can find out in the morning.

LAURA: Okay, okay, okay, okay.

MARISHA: How far away is it from-- wait, wait, wait, wait. Where's your map?

TRAVIS: You sneaky bastard!

MARISHA: I knew it! It was only a matter of time before we ran into people we know! It's like going to the mall on a Sunday. (laughter) You're going to run into your aunt.

TRAVIS: Your aunt?

LAURA: Why are all my spells gone? I can't send any more messages.

TRAVIS: What's it like in Kentucky malls?

MARISHA: (laughs)

MATT: Very different.

SAM: I don't see it on the map that you sent.

TRAVIS: It's tiny. So it's right under Foren. It's that little red dot.

ASHLEY: What is it called?

TRAVIS: The word Foren. A4.

SAM: Oh, that's where, A4, but that's--

MARISHA: But where's the Vermus outpost?

SAM: A Vermus--

TRAVIS: That's the only thing that's east of Aeor on the map.

MARISHA: Oh, A4 is the only--

TRAVIS: The Vermus outpost is not labeled on the map as far as I--

MARISHA: Oh, he said he's east of Aeor, I see.

LAURA: I'm going to--

MARISHA: At the Vermus outpost.

LAURA: I'm going to up. Up.

SAM: Oh.

LAURA: To Dagen's room.

TRAVIS: Unless he's literally on the outskirts of Aeor.

LAURA: (rapid knocking)

MATT: "Hey, I was just starting to nod off. What can I do for you?"

LAURA: I'm sorry. Have you heard of a Vermus outpost to the east?

MATT: "Well, Vermus is actually a collection of ships that the Dynasty usually has, travels occasionally but it's usually out westward. Yeah, an outpost. There is a Dynasty outpost on the eastern side of the crater of Aeor."

LAURA: Okay!

MATT: "Of course, steer clear of it, but I've seen it there. If it was, if it's there still, I mean, it was small enough for it might change location, but it was about a four or five months ago last I saw it."

LAURA: Okay. Thank you.

TRAVIS: Shit. Oh, shit.

LAURA: You can go back to sleep now. I'm sorry for waking you up!

MATT: "I'll do my best," and he slowly closes the door. His eyes still look a little haunted.

LAURA: I really got to modify his memory.

TRAVIS: Got to be careful what we say around people, you guys. Come on. (laughter)

LAURA: It's to the east of the crater.

TRAVIS: Yeah. It's there. It's not A4, it's actually in that crater. So it's at Aeor. Or at least Essek is.

TALIESIN: Very good news.

MARISHA: I'm very glad we checked in on him, because running into him could've been awkward.

TALIESIN: This is also a help from someone that we don't necessarily have to hide from. This is really good. This is somebody who could help us out a lot.

LAURA: I'll call him in the morning again.

SAM: Yeah, sure.

LAURA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: So strange to have two warring nations both capable of help of some kind still--

MARISHA: Everyone converging in on each other.

TRAVIS: Again.

MARISHA: Again.

SAM: Fate. Destiny. Rhubarb. Episode title. (laughter)

TALIESIN: So true. So very, very true.

LIAM: The pies of Nein.

MARISHA: The pies of Nein!

TRAVIS: I smell Veth's pie dish, and it's just pure bourbon. (laughter)

MARISHA: That's not rhubarb!

LIAM: "Rhubarb."

SAM: (drunkenly) We call it that where I'm from.

LIAM: (like drunken Veth) Merry Christmas!

TALIESIN: Grandma's special pie. That pie's for grandma.

MARISHA: Yeah! (laughter)

TRAVIS: Yes! (laughter)

LIAM: That Wild Mother, they want you to call the Wild Mother! (laughter)

TRAVIS: "That pie's for grandma."

MATT: All right. So do you guys have any other business for the evening, or are you going to rest?

LAURA: We go to sleep?

MARISHA: So what does that mean? Are we going to continue to follow him and head towards A2, or do we want to swing wide and go to A4?

LAURA: We'll call Essek in the morning.

MARISHA: Okay. Okay. See what he's done?

LIAM: Yeah, they're both north. I mean, it'd be a while before we'd have to split and pick.

TRAVIS: I think Caleb and Veth were right. I mean, seems north is where we are bound to head.

LAURA: Okay.

LIAM: I, if no one else has anything, I just have a minor thing. Before bed, I will go up to the eighth floor and go into that private floor. Iris opens up and go to eins, zwei, drei, vier. I will open that door and walk into a very small room with a single, Tudor-style window with glass to frost it over and opaque to see through. And sit down on a chair in front of a desk, looking at a bed in the room, a small bed, with the sheets completely ripped off and strewn about, and a pillow on the floor, and just sit in the chair and look at the bed for a while. What are we going to do about home? Can I trust you? Should I trust you? We could make it better, if you want to. And that's it. I'll quietly leave. Shut the door, float down to my bedroom and go to bed.

MATT: Okay. As you all find various levels of comfort--

LAURA: Oh, oh, Mittens, Benji, Cupid, Artemis--

TRAVIS: Optimus?

LAURA: And...

SAM: Optimus Prime.

LAURA: Rudy. (laughter)

ASHLEY: Rudy!

MATT: Rudy!

TRAVIS: Rudy!

LAURA: You're with me tonight, let's shnuggle.

MATT: (cat noises)

TRAVIS: Rudy!

MATT: Some in a cat cuddle, some poring over contentious choices to be made, lingering past shadows, and some revelations they didn't ask for, eventually sleep finds you all. And from there, we're going to go ahead and take a break.

SAM: Oh.

LAURA: No!

MATT: Be back here in just a few minutes to pick up this next leg of the journey, see where it takes us.

LAURA: That was a long--

MATT: See you in a few minutes.

Break
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Yes. Now they're drinking glizzies. What's a glizzy? It's a very popular pop culture thing right now for people to... (laughing) No it's not. Consume and talk about glizzies. A glizzy. This whole ad team just comes up with names with Zs in it? Try this up. A grizzy. (laughing) Okay, okay. You don't like that one. How about a whizzy? (laughing) (upbeat music)

LAURA: Hey Critters, Laura Bailey here. Let's see what's up in the Critical Role shop. Glorious! It's perfect for the home or the office or your bathroom. Roll an investigation if you want. It's basically perfect. These holidays, you know, they're just around the corner. Oh my gosh, it's so amazing. This is, this is a lot of stuff, you guys. We have like so many cool things right now. So click on over to the Critical Role shop. Don't worry, there's a few more minutes in the break. You've still got time. (shopping channel music)

(dramatic music)

MATT: (as Pumat) Huh. (chuckles) Would you look at that? I think it worked. You were right, Pumat Number Three. All we had to do Was invoke that subscription cantrip. Pumat Number Three? Oh boy. Well, hello there! I'm Pumat Prime. It's good to finally join you here in the prime dimension. I see this is the Twitch Prime realm, I think, and... oh, we're in the Critical Role channel, aren't we? Well, would you look at that. You got chat and everything. Respectfully, I was looking for the prime rib realm but this isn't too bad. You see, if you already have access to the Amazon Prime realm, you can get a free subscription to the channel of your choice in the Twitch Prime realm. The two realms have a pretty good working relationship after that peace treaty the prime minister signed a few years back. You just have to remember to renew your Twitch Prime subscription at the top of each month, respectfully. And hey, if you're already a subscriber, you can spread the joy by gifting a subscription using the "gift a sub" button. That is, assuming the empire hasn't sent the tax man to your shop here recently. All right, well, off to find that darn elusive prime rib realm. Who knew the prime dimension had so many pockets? Good luck. Pumat Three? Subscribe. Resubscribe. Brian Foster is not a cabbage.

Part II
MATT: And welcome back. So, Mighty Nein. The morning comes, you all eventually wake and begin to rise. You come to get your breakfast and find awake before all of you is Dagen at the table with a hefty serving of coffee, just-- "Oh hey, morning."

TRAVIS: I slip up behind him and I shove the sword in the back of his neck. (laughter)

MATT: Jesus Christ! It's the only way.

LAURA: I'll go sit down with Dagen.

LIAM: Go to sleep, go to sleep, go to sleep. (laughter)

MATT: "Mornin'."

LAURA: Morning, how did you sleep?

MATT: "Terrible."

LAURA: Don't you think last night was so fun, though?

MATT: "To a point, yeah."

LAURA: Yeah. I pat his arm, and say, I thought the pies were delicious. I can't believe you ate so much. It makes sense that you would feel bad this morning, because you know, you probably got kind of sick from all that pie. And I'll cast Modify Memory on him.

MATT: You-- okay. He does not resist. (laughter)

LIAM: (as Dagen) Oh, sweet relief.

MATT: He goes, "Well I think the main problem... was that I'm not used to eating so much sugary dishes while we're out and about traveling, and it just got to my stomach. I didn't sleep well at all."

LAURA: I know.

MATT: "Just tossing and turning. Man."

LAURA: You get used to it. It gives you extra energy for the next day, and you know, we'll be cold. You'll be shivering a lot. So you'll probably need it.

MATT: "Probably. Well, regardless. Is there any more pie?"

LAURA: (laughs)

SAM: Breakfast pie?

LIAM: Breakfast pie, yeah. That can be arranged.

LAURA: Ooh, breakfast pie. Like a quiche, or-- but you could also do, you know how like breakfast pizza, so like it's like a scrambled egg with like bacon slices over top of it in a pie crust, oh my god.

ASHLEY: What if like...

MARISHA: Breakfast pizza's so good.

ASHLEY: What if like the bacon is like a pie latticework?

LAURA: Yeah.

SAM: Ooh.

ASHLEY: You know?

LAURA: Let's do one of those. Let's do one of those, Caleb.

TALIESIN: Scrambled eggs and cheese.

LAURA: Also breakfast pizza, also pancakes.

LIAM: Okay. (ringing)

SAM: Pancake pie.

MATT: (meowing)

LIAM: Good morning, Johann.

MATT: (tired meowing)

LIAM: I have a very long list of food. I need waffles and pancakes

ASHLEY: Pancakes, yeah.

LIAM: And just whatever leftover pie that you guys did not eat after we had dinner last night. And also could we get like a breakfast quiche pie? That is--

TRAVIS: Look at Johann. Johann's an asshole. (laughter)

TALIESIN: That's the look of a cat who's considering unionizing.

LIAM: Just a quiche, lots of egg, maybe put some capers in there as well. but then a lattice work--

LAURA: Capers, Caleb you're going to put capers in a quiche?

LIAM: (whispers) Put the capers in. And then a lattice work of bacon to, I guess, hide the flavor of the capers.

TALIESIN: I'll just take the capers.

MATT: As Johann turns-- as Johann turns and acknowledges these six other cats around that all look at each other he goes, (resigned meow), and then heads off and they all follow suit.

TRAVIS: He's the head of the union. (laughter) Shit's been going down at night. (laughter)

MATT: They've been organizing for a few weeks now.

LIAM: They're up in that hub room going-- (meowing).

TRAVIS: Pancakes, pizza, what are they fucking crazy?

MATT: Rightly so.

TRAVIS: We're killing ourselves.

MATT: I'm excited for the Fae Cat Union to present itself. It's gonna be good.

LIAM: God, who knows what the chicken-making blue people did behind the scenes.

TALIESIN: Oh man, I'd forgotten about that.

MARISHA: What if like the next time--

ASHLEY: I have no idea what that means.

SAM: That's my people, that's Scanlan's people were the chicken-making blue people.

ASHLEY: Oh, duh!

TALIESIN: Way back, way back.

MATT: To be fair--

ASHLEY: I have every idea of what that means.

SAM: Just imagine-- just imagine Blue Man Group just holding chicken.

ASHLEY: Oh yeah, we had all the chicken. I remember this.

SAM: (drum noises)

MATT: Perfect. But yes, the day is yours. Dagen eventually helps lead you out into the familiar snow.

SAM: Oh, yes, can we see our-- can we see the other camp? Is the camp-- have they packed up and left?

LIAM: I'm sorry, I just, I had a visual in my head and I have to share it before we move on with the story. Just Grog, standing, holding his mouth open and the blue spectral guys throwing Cornish hens, and them going (thudding). (laughter) I'm sorry.

MARISHA: Whole Cornish hens.

MATT: There we go.

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: Put it in the series.

TRAVIS: We'll write that down.

LIAM: As you were.

MATT: No worries. As you emerge, you discover that the fire is no longer lit. There's no smoke trail, and the camp appears to have been abandoned.

MARISHA: Did we want to reach out to Essek again before we go?

SAM: Can you do it as we walk or do we have to be--

LAURA: No, I can do it as we're walking.

TRAVIS: Wait, wait. Put your hands on Beau's shoulders and I'll make sure your face doesn't--

LAURA: Oh, I'm not scrying on Essek. I'm just sending him a message.

TRAVIS: Yep. (laughter) I'm coming apart at the seams, you guys.

MATT: It's been a week.

TRAVIS: Send help.

LAURA: But should I see if he wants to meet us somewhere? Where's he heading? What should I ask him?

TRAVIS: (as Jester) I try to talk.

MARISHA: I'm just trying to talk.

TALIESIN: I'd say see if we can meet and talk. And that it's important and dangerous and happening fast.

LAURA: Oh, that's all good stuff to say.

LIAM: Heading north or heading your way, wondering if--

SAM: Should we give him our position, in case he wants to come to us?

LAURA: Well, we'll meet somewhere. What's a good meeting point from where he is? If he's at the East of Aeor crater.

TRAVIS: Well, if we are half a day's north of A5, and if this is 10 days, there are-- there's like a little mountain peak in the middle of Allowak's Sanctuary. Or we could meet at the flow shift. That's kind of a halfway point between--

LAURA: Flow shift?

TRAVIS: Yeah, that's where the magma seems to-- the lava seems to come up and go out.

LIAM: Or there's that entrance where the mountains part and into Aeor, maybe before going in at the-- at the edge of the lava river there?

TRAVIS: Yeah, it's almost three-quarters of the way there, but not all the way.

TALIESIN: But that would mean he possibly would have to cross the Tomb Takers, though. Maybe it's best if we just stay with them until we either get ahead of them, or until he doesn't have to meet them halfway before he gets to us.

TRAVIS: Yeah, if he's on the Eastern part.

LAURA: Whelp, I don't know what to tell him.

SAM: Well, tell him where we are.

TRAVIS: As we get closer to the flow shift we can decide if we--

MARISHA: See how it plays out, yeah?

LAURA: Okay, okay, okay. Essek! Do you want to meet us? Things are dangerous. It's important.

SAM: Tell him where we are.

LAURA: I don't know how to tell him where we are.

SAM: Tell them where we just left. We just left--

TALIESIN: South of the--

LAURA: We just left... A-- A5, whatever that means. Meet you by the flow change?

SAM: Moving north.

LAURA: Moving north!

MATT: (laughs)

LAURA: That one did not go as well, I don't think.

TRAVIS: You need to step up your game.

LAURA: Stop trying to tell me what to say, when I'm-- don't ask me questions when I'm sending messages! It's very distracting, Veth.

SAM: I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry, but you stopped halfway through the message and it looked like your nose was bleeding. (laughter) I'm sorry.

MATT: Essek responds:

MATT: "It is fortuitous that it seems our paths... unite?" he says with a question. "I currently oversee this outpost and cannot... leave, but feel free to visit."

LAURA: He oversees the outpost?

TRAVIS: Is he being punished? Is it like a Siberian outpost where they, like, send somebody who's in trouble?

TALIESIN: It's a Siberian outpost on the giant crater full of esoteric magic. That doesn't seem like that much of a punishment.

LIAM: He might be organizing excavation or--

MARISHA: Maybe he's tasked with something big. Seems like a pretty big charge.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

LAURA: So he's not going to meet us, but we can go there, he says.

TALIESIN: I guess next message just warn him that the Tomb Takers are coming, and that whoever they sent south is dead now.

LAURA: I'll-- oh right. I'll tell him that tomorrow.

TALIESIN: Fair.

LAURA: Or tonight, depending on what kind of spells we need today.

MATT: All right.

MARISHA: So are we going to continue north following behind them? At least for today?

MATT: (as Dagen) "It looks like we still got tracks on them, so we can keep following."

LAURA: Yeah, let's do it.

MATT: "All righty."

TRAVIS: Dagen, a question.

MATT: "Yeah."

TRAVIS: Are you planning to go eastward around these peaks in the middle of Allowak's Sanctuary or a westerly direction? Are you going to hug the lava river?

MATT: "Well, I mean, it depends on what their-- their footsteps are takin' us necessarily. If they're smart, they're going to avoid Allowak."

TRAVIS: Oh, yes, of course.

LIAM: What's the danger of Allowak?

MATT: "Well, it's a-- it's a whole massive Yeti community that generally wants to keep itself unknown. I mean, we have-- we have an in to a certain extent. I don't know about if your friends do or not."

LAURA: Oh my gosh. What if we got to Allowak sanctuary, the Yetis help us get there, like, to the next location even faster, because remember the Yetis were super helpful.

MATT: "Now, mind you, I'm just saying, putting this out there from my experience with what I've heard and seen out there, them helping us get here was very, you know, very fortuitous given how things were going south real fast for them. I don't know if they necessarily have any benefit to helping us necessarily, but if you're feeling confident in convincing them otherwise, you're a better man than I."

MARISHA: You think if the Tomb Takers head that way, that it'll slow them down? You think that could potentially be our opportunity to surpass them?

MATT: "Well, I mean if-- they're likely-- once again, we'll see how the tracks take us. They're likely to probably head around the river as opposed to the sanctuary since the Yetis are very territorial and don't want folks... knowing the exact location. So if they're liable to go through there there's a chance they might get spotted and a confrontation will ensue, which would slow them down. But once again, they're your friends, you tell me. Or we just continue to follow the tracks."

TRAVIS: We continue to follow, yeah?

LAURA: Let's just keep going.

TRAVIS: Don't need to over complicate.

MATT: "All righty. Get behind me." And he goes ahead and leads you on the path there--

TRAVIS: By the way, Vess DeRogna's dead! I'm just kidding. (laughter)

MATT: "What?!"

LAURA: Keep wasting my spells.

MATT: Who wants to roll for this day's travel?

LIAM: It's Travis's turn.

MARISHA: Yeah, your turn.

TRAVIS: Oh, boy. ♪ You're cold as ice ♪ 14.

MATT: 14, all righty. Go ahead and roll a d8 for me.

TRAVIS: It's totally fine, you guys. It's fine. One.

LIAM: Here it is.

MATT: One.

TRAVIS: What the fuck.

TALIESIN: Don't do that. That's not cool.

TRAVIS: It's fine, it's fine.

LIAM: I'm sure it's probably fine.

MATT: It's fine, it's fine. So--

TRAVIS: The word is pronounced unimpeded. (laughter)

TALIESIN: He's going to 'pede us.

MATT: You're going to get so 'peded! You don't even know! No one's ever been quite as 'peded as you're all about to be. Continuing onward for roughly a little over half of the day's travel, clear skies-- well, clear as in the means that there isn't any immediate snowfall. Occasionally, you see breaks in it. You see a little bit of blue peek through. The gray skies still tend to rule the horizon line, but the light snow has given away to clear. The temperature actually rises a bit. It's a hint of comfort, which is nice.

MARISHA: Good one

LIAM: Psych.

TRAVIS: It's the Wild Mother.

MATT: At a certain point, Dagen goes-- (laughter) As Dagen is currently making his way up this portion-- you can see the area you're in has like some broken, broken frozen pond areas where it looks like some moisture has frozen into solid spaces, and he brings himself to the top of the hill before stopping, and... "No."

LAURA: What?

MATT: "Y'all here that?"

TRAVIS and MARISHA: Do we?

LIAM: Should we be concerned?

MATT: Make a perception check.

LIAM: Yeah, I'm listening.

TRAVIS: I assisted him. I was with you.

LAURA: I guided, Guidance.

MARISHA: I listened so hard.

TALIESIN: 28.

MATT: You definitely hear it. There's a-- it's weird. It's this, at first sounds like a sourceless muffled grinding sound.

TALIESIN: It's like a sourceless muffled grinding sound.

MATT: It's very faint.

SAM: SMGS? Oh no.

MATT: And you--

TALIESIN: Can we-- yeah, go ahead.

MATT: You here on top of it in short bursts this odd, high-pitched trill. This like a (purring bursts). It's almost insect-like. It's weird and it's faint. And both are getting steadily louder.

LAURA: Oh, are these those scary snow worms you were talking about?

MATT: "Grab a weapon, because I think that's exactly what it might be."

LAURA: Oh god.

MARISHA: Can we get on defense or something like that?

TRAVIS: Circle back to back.

MATT: "Yeah, back to back is something I haven't-- whatever you do, stop moving."

TRAVIS: You want to cast some ring of something shit.

LAURA: I'm going to cast Spiritual Weapon-- I mean, no, Spiritual Guardians.

SAM: I'm going to cast Levitate.

MATT: All right, you cast Levitate. You're going to cast Spirit Guardians.

TALIESIN: I'm also going to put up Spirit Guardians as well.

TRAVIS: Sword is out. Galas-var!

LAURA: 5th-level.

MATT: Yep, Sheila's out.

MARISHA: Patient Defense, can I do that? Or I'll just defend.

MATT: You can spend your action to dodge, if you want to.

MARISHA: Yeah, to dodge.

MATT: As you all stand there with the hint of ice glittering. You watch as the surface in which elements of small snow and ice flecks start clattering across the surface. You begin to feel the vibration of the ground beneath you. Dagen just sits there and takes a big gulp and goes, "Unfortunately, I think I was right." (crashing) (screaming) Out of the ground to the right of your group, you watch as a spray of white snow ice and dirt is thrown 20, 30, 40 feet in the air in this massive explosion. You all immediately recoil and glance up as you see this massive swollen white armored mass of flesh, as you see this massive swollen white armored mass of flesh, pinkish and red, poking through this white armored carcass-like exterior. As it rises up, the top curls back down, you see a singular angry burning eye in the middle of its faces as its jaw splits open. (shrill shrieking) (exclaiming)

MATT: That weird trill sound--

TRAVIS: Oh no! He's close to me.

MATT: -- strikes the air and your ears feel like they're about to burst for a moment. I need you all to roll initiative. (cheering)

TRAVIS: Hey, what the fuck was that, though?

LIAM: Way to go, Travis.

SAM: That was incredible.

LAURA: I like how we always get fights when Travis is in charge.

TRAVIS: You're welcome.

SAM: Guys, transform your gaming table into what you see here on the Critical Role with your friends at Dwarven Forge.

LAURA: "On the Critical Role."

SAM: Check out their amazing stuff at dwarvenforge.com. They have ice stuff.

ASHLEY: Whoa.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: Forgen Dwarve, you say?

MATT: Where would you guys like to be situated, I suppose?

LIAM: Far away from the worm.

SAM: I'm 20 feet in the air.

TRAVIS: Is that a frozen lake that we are near?

MATT: That is patch of frozen moisture and water. It's not terribly large, but that's just a corner of it there.

TRAVIS: I guess-- are we in a-- we're back to back, so I guess.

MATT: I'll place you guys here.

TRAVIS: Dead middle's good.

MATT: And you tell me if you want to change or shift any of this. I'm just telling you where you are currently, you know...

TRAVIS: We could probably move 10 feet away from the water. Yeah? The frozen--

TALIESIN: Oh yeah.

MARISHA: I'm fine with that.

LAURA: (with a rising pitch) Do we?

TRAVIS: (as Laura) "Do we?"

LAURA: Or do we want to be close to the water? (battle horn sounds)

MATT: I'm saying as far as party arrangement goes.

LAURA: I'm happy.

LIAM: Back me up against that spike by Veth and Fjord more, please. Yes, thank you.

MATT: All right.

SAM: Put me 20 feet in the air.

MATT: That's right because you are levitating.

SAM: Levitato.

TRAVIS: Demi Levitato.

LIAM: Me and the village of Vo.

TALIESIN: And we have two spells up already, two defensive spells.

LAURA: Yeah, we have two Spirit Guardians.

MATT: Yes, you do. Both of them?

LAURA: Yeah.

SAM: King of the North.

TALIESIN: They're both the same, pretty much.

TRAVIS: King of the North.

MATT: You guys do have separate radiuses.

TALIESIN: Yeah, slightly separate.

MATT: All right, anybody wish to be placed separately?

TRAVIS: I don't think so...

LAURA: Nah, let's just-- we were back to back.

MATT: That's what you said. That'll put you about there.

SAM: Is Dagen in there?

MATT: Dagen is.

LAURA: Oh.

TALIESIN: Nope.

SAM: That's not Dagen.

LAURA: Oh my lord.

TRAVIS: What the fuck is that?

LAURA: It's a purple worm.

TRAVIS: You're missing part of its mouth.

LIAM: That ain't a purple worm.

LAURA: Well, it is technically.

TALIESIN: It is definitely one-eyed and a purple people eater.

TRAVIS: That thing is cool!

LAURA: This is the thing we fought before, right? The kind of thing--

MATT: Nope.

LAURA: Something different?

MATT: Something different.

ASHLEY: Ew, he's coming out of the ground.

LIAM: Look, he's got homemade snow glued to his foot.

ASHLEY: That's so cool.

MATT: All right, so since he did emerge into the Spirit Guardians that you've, oh shouldn't he be-- yeah, he'd be touching it there. He was in the radius, so.

TALIESIN: Now if he walks into the radius, then he has to make a save.

MATT: And he starts his turn there.

TALIESIN and LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Though you cast it before he emerged, so technically he would enter it now. So is it wisdom save?

TALIESIN: It's a wisdom save.

MATT: Wisdom, that is a failure. How much damage does it take?

TALIESIN: That's a bunch of d8s.

LAURA: And he-- is it the same resistance for mine?

MATT: He is not quite in your radius yet.

TALIESIN: So that's...

TALIESIN: 20 points of radiant damage.

MATT: 20 points, nice. Now... Initiative, 25 to 20.

MARISHA: 23.

MATT: 23.

SAM: 23! (impressed sounds)

MATT: 20 to 15?

LIAM: 18.

MATT: 18.

TRAVIS: 15.

MATT: All right. 15 to 10.

ASHLEY: 13.

TALIESIN: 12.

MATT: And Jester?

LAURA: Oh, seven.

MATT: All righty. Beau and Veth, you are up first.

MARISHA: All right.

SAM: Ladies first, so I'll go.

MARISHA: Sure, go for it.

SAM: I'll do-- I'll bonus action Brenatto's Voltaic Bolt, and I will hold my shot until it is in--

MARISHA: See if I get a Stunning Strike?

SAM: -- melee combaty sort of whatever with an ally, so I can get sneak attack.

MATT: Okay, fair enough.

ASHLEY: You're not going to give away your shot?

SAM: I'm not going to throw it away.

MATT: But give it away, give it away, give it away, give it away now. All right, so is that your turn? You're going to stay put?

SAM: Absolutely, yes.

MATT: Floating in the air.

SAM: Oh, and I'll ♪ rise up. ♪ Oh my god. (laughter)

MATT: Damn it.

MARISHA: I love how mad at yourself you were.

TRAVIS: "Oh god."

MARISHA: "Oh my god." (laughter)

MATT: That was pretty bad.

TRAVIS: Years, it's been years.

MATT: All righty, that finishes your turn.

SAM: That's it.

MATT: Beau, whatcha doing?

MARISHA: Okay, I look at Veth, knowing what's happening, and knowing what she's waiting for, I'm going to run. I'm going to jump and I'm going to swing wide around to the other side of the wormy worm, if I can move around this-- its backside a bit, I guess.

MATT: All right, over here?

MARISHA: Whatever works.

MATT: You definitely have enough movement for that, yeah.

MARISHA: Fine, yeah. Whatever-- does that give you what you need?

SAM: As long as you're engaged, I think that gives me sneak attack.

MATT: Yeah, so you can take your shot.

SAM: I will take my shot. I am not going to take my shot because that was a 14?

MATT: 14. As you're lifting up, you lift to the side and as soon as Beauregard moves around it, you see its head (clicking) in your direction. You (screams) and you fire, and it just glances off of its armored shell. No impact, unfortunately.

MARISHA: Shit.

SAM: Oh, well.

MATT: Beauregard.

MARISHA: I'm going to use that distraction, as it's looking at a looking at Veth, and I'm going to come up and I'm going to do two big sweeping, upward strikes with my staff.

MATT: Go for it. Roll for an attack.

LAURA: Just be like (grunting).

MARISHA: (unsure grunting)

SAM: (weak grunting)

MARISHA: 26 and 20-- nope, yeah, 26 and 22.

MATT: Both hit, go ahead and roll damage.

MARISHA: Yeah, they weren't too bad. (dramatic background music) (singing along to background music)

MARISHA: Those were both seven, so 14 plus another, plus eight for both of those, so 14 plus 16 is definitely 30. Yeah, 30 points.

MATT: So as you crack--

MARISHA: And Stunning Strike on that first one.

MATT: Okay, that is a-- (laughs) it's a 17 still.

MARISHA: Fuck, Stunning Strike again on the second one.

MATT: Okay. Oh, much higher.

MARISHA: Fuck!

MATT: Yeah. You also take 22 points of cold damage.

MARISHA: Fuck!

TRAVIS: For hitting it?

MATT: As you hit it with one strike the-- you realize at that point, there is an aura of extremely cold frost similar to the elementals that you fought before, but even more intense, and as you strike it with a blow it bursts back in your face. (grunts) You angrily spin with the other hit, and it bursts back again, and all of a sudden you realize there's frost gathered around your shoulders and your jaw and your front of your hair and your brows. Your eyes you have to close for fear of the moisture in them freezing solid. It hurt.

TRAVIS: Whoa.

MATT: You have your bonus action still.

MARISHA: 22 points of cold damage?

MATT: Of cold damage.

TRAVIS: Fuck a duck. I see that math happening.

MARISHA: Yeah, if he got a 17 and then he rolled higher.

SAM: (whistles background music)

MARISHA: Do I feel like it was because I was hitting him, like in contact-- it was a melee contact?

MATT: It did feel like that, or at least it was when you struck it, it blasted back into you. The cold seemed to react to the impact.

TRAVIS: When you punched it, the skin on your knuckles stayed there.

MARISHA: Yeah. I'm going to do-- is it an action to turn on my-- I don't know if it is.

TALIESIN: Feel like like it's a bonus action.

MARISHA: "At the start of your turn," I can-- at the start of my turn.

MATT: At the start of your turn, so you can't activate it this turn.

MARISHA: So I'm just going to Patient Defense.

MATT: Okay, Patient Defense, you got it. Finishing Beau's go and Veth finished hers. Caleb, you're up; Fjord, you're on deck.

LIAM: I pull out a pinch of iron powder and look to Yasha and just stretch my hands out. And the dust scatters in front of you. And she grows to twice her size. And I start to just slide around and behind that fragment of stone on the edge of the ice.

MATT: That pushes Caduceus back a bit as well as shoving--

LIAM: Attack of the 50-foot woman.

LAURA: Oh shit, you already had one?!

MATT: Indeed.

LIAM: And I want to get on the other side of that tallest stone to block myself from the worm. Yeah.

MATT: Over here, you mean?

LIAM: Yeah, on the edge of the ice.

MATT: Okay, you got it.

LIAM: Danke!

MATT: You are right against the edge where it begins to slip down under the sheet, so.

MARISHA: Yasha. Yaas-sha.

ASHLEY: Yaaas-sha.

MATT: All righty, that finishes Caleb's go. Fjord, you're up.

LIAM: Look how big she is!

TRAVIS: Awesome, I am going to use all 30 feet to run out to the side here in this direction. Kind of spread out the group just a titty bit.

MATT: 30, you can get there.

TRAVIS: Great, and I will-- I'll have the runes on the Star Razor pulse, and I will cast Faerie Fire against this big-ass worm.

MATT: You got it. Is that a dex save?

TRAVIS: It is, yes.

MATT: That is a fail, I'm pretty sure. It's a five.

TRAVIS: 15, great.

SAM: Does Faerie Fire stay with them, or is it the area that they're currently in?

LIAM: No, stays with.

TRAVIS: Stays with them. It's concentration. A 20-foot cube, so I'll just put it so that the corner of it is on the worm and not on Beau or Yasha or Caduceus.

LIAM: That means advantage for everyone's attacks, right?

TRAVIS: It does.

MARISHA: Fuck yeah.

LIAM: Game on.

LAURA: We all get advantage?

MARISHA: Such a great spell.

TRAVIS: Yeah, it can't go invisible. And it'll glow green.

MATT: It'll glow green?

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MATT: I will actually switch out--

LAURA: Ooh!

TRAVIS: Oh!

SAM: Oh, for flair.

MATT: Going to make it fun, because you said green. I'll let it be green, [inaudible] smaller.

MARISHA: Eat it, eat it.

TRAVIS: Or maybe it'll be pink.

MATT: Maybe we'll pretend it's green. (laughter) It's D&D, use your imagination.

SAM: I think it'll have to [inaudible].

MATT: Sorry, I broke immersion, guys, fuck.

TRAVIS: That's it.

MATT: So you watch as Fjord spins around, as he arcs his hand, all of a sudden there's this spray of weirdly glowing green globules that suddenly burst and adhere to the outside of this creature, and as it does they all light up around it, like this starscape of bright green energy that's clinging to its body. That finishes your turn?

TRAVIS: Yep.

MATT: All righty, it's now its turn. At this point, as the magic sprays on it and it took the impact from behind, it seems nonplussed, but not distracted by it. Its jaw now begins to open wide in the three different places. Now you can see the toothy-lined interior of its open mouth and just, (shrieking) and the trill pierces the air around it. All of you, moreso when it arrived, you feel the scream just beat onto your eardrums and into your mind. I need everybody to make a wisdom saving throw, please.

LIAM: No! Don't like that

SAM: But we have advantage.

LAURA: We all get advantage on it because we--

SAM: Heroes' Feast?

LAURA: Yeah, we totally are awesome.

ASHLEY: No advantage, we just are rolling.

LIAM: Oh no.

LAURA: Oh, what's that, natural 20!

MATT: Nice.

MARISHA: Oh, there's a lot of groans.

TRAVIS: (groans)

TALIESIN: Oh no.

MARISHA: Lot of groans.

SAM: I'm going to fall 40 feet.

TRAVIS: 13.

MATT: 13, okay.

LAURA: Natural 20 for a 30.

MATT: 30, great. Caleb?

LIAM: 13.

MATT: 13.

SAM: 14.

MATT: 14.

ASHLEY: Eight.

MATT: Eight.

TALIESIN: 13.

MATT: 13.

MARISHA: 15.

LAURA: Oh no. What about Dagen? What did you-- you also rolled 15?

TRAVIS: 13.

LAURA: Everybody rolled low?

MARISHA: Except for you.

LAURA: Oh no. (laughter)

TRAVIS: There's another 18 over here somewhere.

MATT: Dagen failed as well.

LAURA: Everybody failed?!

MATT: Everybody failed except for you.

MARISHA and SAM: Oh no. (screaming)

MARISHA: What does it mean?!

TALIESIN: Whatever high level spells you have, you better bust them out.

MARISHA: If we have our brains.

SAM: Is it paralysis? Is it fright? What is it?

MARISHA: Does he possess us? Are we worm people now?

TRAVIS: We're going to find out, oh no.

MATT: You are all stunned for one minute.

TRAVIS: One minute?!

SAM: Oh no, you got to have some restoration or something.

MARISHA: Oh no.

SAM: Does that mean I fall out of the sky, Matthew?

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: It does. All spells that are being concentrated on drop.

TRAVIS and MARISHA: Fuck!

MATT: So Yasha reverts.

LIAM: You shrunk my barbarian.

TRAVIS: Oh boy.

MARISHA: We lost that Faerie Fire?

MATT: You plummet and take--

MARISHA: Wait, is Faerie Fire concentration?

TALIESIN: No.

TRAVIS: It is.

MATT: It is, I believe.

MARISHA: Oh, fuck.

ASHLEY: I just saw it, too, and I got out the d4.

MATT: You take 10 points of bludgeoning damage as you fall into the ground.

SAM: Not bad, actually.

TALIESIN: Do you have anything?

LAURA: I have a plan.

MATT: And the Faerie Fire fades.

TALIESIN: You have a plan?

SAM: Is it "Run"?

LAURA: I'm just going to leave you guys and run away.

LIAM: Byeeee!

LAURA: That's my plan.

ASHLEY: Going to Aeor.

LAURA: I'll slowly revive you guys over the next few days! Bye!

LIAM: (like Jester) I'm a Tomb Taker now.

MARISHA: Lucien, wait up!

LAURA: Essek, um!

MARISHA: Lucien!

TALIESIN: Fuck, man.

MATT: All of you just fall to the ground, clutching your head and you can't see it. It's just white, white hot, knife vision in your mind You can't even form thought. You are just frozen in place as your body is just hearing this high pitched screaming whine, and all thought and reaction is brought to a dull nothingness.

TRAVIS: This is a good lesson. We really need protection against this.

LIAM: I don't think there's ever been a moment in this show where the group has all but one has been whammied like that.

MATT: Yeah, usually it's the other way, so I'm super happy right now. (laughter) Yasha, I need you to make constitution saving throw.

LIAM: That's amazing.

ASHLEY: Okay, which one do I choose? I'll do this one. Oh, that was good, that was good. That would be a total of 26.

MATT: Yasha, as you shrink down clutching your head, you look up at the creature and not even realizing your friends around you, that pain sucked and was really uncalled for. And in the fury and anger within, you shrug off the effect and your eyes go bloodshot.

TRAVIS: Yeah, let's go.

MATT: You are no longer stunned. It is your turn, it is your turn.

ASHLEY: It's my turn?

MARISHA: Is that some barbarian shit?

MATT: No, she just rolled really high.

MARISHA: You just rolled high?

MATT: Yeah.

ASHLEY: It my turn?

MATT: That's the end of your turn.

ASHLEY: That's the end of my turn. Oh, because that's because we were stunned, and we all got shit.

MARISHA: So we can shrug it off.

SAM: Oh, so we get a save every time it comes up.

MATT: Caduceus, it's your turn.

MARISHA: I guess so, yeah.

MATT: Go ahead and roll a constitution saving throw.

TALIESIN: This is not going to go well.

LIAM: Shrank my damn barbarian.

TALIESIN: Not feeling it.

SAM: Wasted spells.

MARISHA: Goddamn it.

TRAVIS: ♪ GIF of the week! ♪

TALIESIN: Constitution? I don't suppose 11 is great.

MATT: You are still lost in the haze.

SAM: 11 is just what you need.

MATT: Jester, it's your turn.

LAURA: Oh shit, I'm going to look around. I'm going to run forward to the other side.

MATT: Also this drops.

TALIESIN: Oh yeah, the other one's not gone, but that one is.

MATT: No, Jester keeps hers.

LAURA: I'm going to run around Dagen and get closer to the worm,

LAURA: I'm going to run around Dagen and get closer to the worm, so it's within my range of Spirit Guardians, but I want to stay at a distance, you know what I mean?

MATT: How far away, like in front of Dagen?

LAURA: Like, I need to be within 15 feet of it, but--

LIAM: But that's it.

LAURA: Yeah, I don't want to get closer than that.

MATT: Correct, it's within your range there.

LAURA: Okay, and then--

TRAVIS: This is snow is awesome.

ASHLEY: It's so cool.

TRAVIS: The base of it, so rad.

LAURA: And then--

TALIESIN: Plan?

LAURA: Yeah. I'm going to cast Polymorph on it.

MATT: On it?

MARISHA and LAURA: Yes.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: Do it.

LAURA: I'm going to try to turn it into something that can handle the cold weather. A snow bunny.

MATT: A snow bunny, okay. What's the save on that. Is it wisdom?

LAURA: Wisdom.

MATT: Wisdom, on a DC of?

LAURA: 18.

MATT: 18. That's a fail. (sharp inhalations)

MARISHA: Thank god.

TRAVIS: Dude, dude.

MARISHA: Oh, thank god.

SAM: Epic.

TALIESIN: Make sure it's not in your fucking range.

LAURA: Well, I can, the range is within my control. I get to say if it's a threat or not, so.

MATT: We'll say that is a bunny. (laughter)

MARISHA: Oh, buddy.

ASHLEY: Oh, it's a doggo! That looks like Henry.

LAURA: And the guardians are not going to attack it, because it's not a threat. They attack only the things that I want them to attack.

TALIESIN: That's true, you can designate.

MATT: Just double checking that for my own.

SAM: Sure, sure.

TALIESIN: Now I'm rereading it. Now you made me paranoid.

MATT: "When you cast the spell, you can designate it."

LAURA: Then I'm going to back up, because it's at the start of their turn.

MATT: That's true, okay, so you back up. So you moved here, one, two, three, five, six, I imagine.

LIAM: Success.

SAM: Sucks ass?

LAURA: Sucks ass.

MATT: All right, that finishes your turn?

LAURA: And I'm going to go: Wake up, everyone! Wake up! It's a bunny!

MATT: They don't notice anything. You guys have no idea what's happening.

LAURA: Does it cancel the stunned affect? It doesn't cancel it if it--

MATT: No.

LAURA: Oh god, okay.

MATT: It's not like a spell it cast on you.

TRAVIS: If that dog, bunny, runs into that ring we're fucked.

TALIESIN: Yeah, if the bunny runs into the circle we're fucked.

TRAVIS: You bought us a round at least.

LAURA: Well, you know, I can, I mean, I can drop my Spirit Guardians. So maybe I'll just drop it.

TRAVIS: On your turn, right?

LAURA: But I mean, it's easy to just drop a spell.

MATT: If you want to.

TALIESIN: You just hit yourself in the head hard enough.

LAURA: I'm going to drop the spell, just in case. I don't want the bunny to fucking run into my--

MARISHA: Look, it's a bunny. (expanding) (screaming)

MARISHA: Shit!

MATT: Okay, all right. Beauregard.

MARISHA: I'm going to save, right? It's all about that save.

LIAM: Wisdom.

TALIESIN: How long does Polymorph last?

LAURA: An hour.

MARISHA: Natural one.

MATT: You remain stunned. It is not magic.

LAURA: It's only magic.

MATT: Yeah, all right, that finishes your turn. Veth, I need you to make a constitution saving throw for me, please.

SAM: 10.

MATT: It's a ten? Okay, you remain stunned. Caleb, I need you to make a constitution saving throw.

LIAM: Wisdom save, that is--

MATT: Constitution.

LIAM: Constitution, that is a 19.

MATT: 19, you fail.

TRAVIS: Wow, fuck, oh no.

MARISHA: Thank god we don't have to deal with this thing.

TRAVIS: Oh shit.

MATT: All right, so that brings us to Fjord. I need you to make a constitution saving throw.

MARISHA: What do you have to do? Roll a 20?

TRAVIS: Nope.

MATT: Okay, you remain stunned.

LIAM: Unless it tries to kill itself in shame. (high-pitched) I can't live like this. (poofing)

MATT: If I could have... have Beau-- or no, you're actually. Huh. If I could have Yasha, and Caduceus, Jester, and Fjord all roll a d20 for me.

TALIESIN: Nope.

TRAVIS: Natural 20. What, what it's right here!

MATT: Whoever rolled the highest was going to be the target.

SAM: Yes!

ASHLEY: Definitely wasn't going to be me.

TRAVIS: I feel like that's in some way appropriate.

LAURA: It's still going to attack as a bunny. It's going to attack?

MATT: Of course, it doesn't--

LIAM: It's got terrible teeth!

TRAVIS: It's so Holy Grail.

MARISHA: It's so Monty Python.

MATT: It is not intelligent enough to acknowledge that it's a bunny right now. It's just wondering why everything is so much bigger and it's confused and it's still going with its instincts.

MARISHA: You take that attack.

TRAVIS: Should've made it a baby seal, so they're (seal barking).

MATT: It does have advantage on the attack, because you're stunned. That is a 17.

TRAVIS: To hit?!

MATT: Yeah.

TRAVIS: That's my AC. (laughter)

TALIESIN: This is everything I wanted, right here.

MATT: You take a point of piercing damage as it bites on you.

TRAVIS: I'm never living that down.

MARISHA: First the snapping turtle, and now the bunny.

LIAM: This is a sequel to the snapping turtle.

MATT: That's right. It jumps through the snow. (hopping)

TRAVIS: Fjord, to you want to go to the Arbuckle Wilderness? (screaming) No!

LAURA: Arbuckle Wilderness.

MATT: That's hilarious. All right.

TRAVIS: In the 80s. Is that still around?

MATT: Wait. You have Star Razor up, don't you?

TRAVIS: I do. Oh!

MARISHA: (screams) No!

LAURA: Does it automatically fight back?

TRAVIS: Yeah, it does.

SAM: Oh no.

TRAVIS: It does. He takes--

SAM: He blasts back.

SAM: Like 25 points of damage.

MATT: It's not 25.

TRAVIS: 1d12 radiant damage.

LIAM: That rabbit's got two hit points at best.

ASHLEY: Oh no, you don't...

MARISHA: Oh, it's a worm again.

ASHLEY: You don't roll to hit?

TRAVIS: Where's my d12?

ASHLEY: It just does it automatically?

MARISHA: Of all people for the bunny to go after.

LIAM: That's amazing.

TRAVIS: One, I rolled a one.

LIAM: Well, I want to fight a worm.

MATT: I know. It has a hit point. (groaning and screaming)

MATT: It's a snow bunny!

MARISHA: Hit point of a kitten.

SAM: Oh no!

MATT: (crashing sound) (cheering and laughter)

LIAM: Meat's back on the menu, boys!

LAURA: Yeah, yeah, yeah!

MARISHA: Oh no!

SAM: So now you've killed a bunny paralyzed. (laughter)

MATT: Yasha, you are up and it's your turn.

ASHLEY: Okay, I'm coming out of the--

MATT: Looking at Fjord going, "No, no, no, no!" (explosion) (screaming) (laughter)

MARISHA: Not me, not me! Shoo! Shoo!

TRAVIS: Do I roll to s-- does it break the charm at all?

MATT: No, it's not like that.

LIAM: It bit your foot and your foot went (explosion).

ASHLEY: Oh my god. Okay, so as I'm coming to, I'm getting so angry and now the worm is gone from my area so I will make my way over to--

SAM, MARISHA, and ASHLEY: ♪ Making my way! ♪

ASHLEY: ♪ Making my way to the worm. ♪ Okay?

MATT: There? Anywhere else you want to be placed?

ASHLEY: Yeah, yeah, yeah. So flanking. Oh no. That doesn't work because it's--

MATT: There?

ASHLEY: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

MATT: He's not really threatening you at the moment, so you don't get any flanking bonus.

ASHLEY: No, no, that's fine. Okay, so.

MATT: But you can attack recklessly if you want to, for the advantage.

ASHLEY: Yes, I would like rage.

LAURA: You were so proud of it, too

ASHLEY: And-- That's right, I never use reckless, I always forget about that. Okay, so raging and attacking.

MATT: Raging and attacking, go for it.

ASHLEY: Okay.

LIAM: D&D is so weird. Yasha went (growing and shrinking noises) and the worm went (shrinking and growing noises).

ASHLEY: 18?

MATT: It totally did! (laughter)

MARISHA: Yeah, within, like, six seconds.

LAURA: (yelling)

LIAM: In six seconds or less.

MATT: Yeah. If Lucien's group is watching from a distance, they're like, "What the fuck is happening?"

TRAVIS: Dagen's just going like, "I don't want to remember this either." (laughter)

LIAM: "Take my memory away again."

MATT: So Yasha?

ASHLEY: Does that hit? 18?

MATT: 18 does hit.

ASHLEY: Okay, so, that's pretty good. Okay, that would be, hmm, 29 points of damage for the first hit.

MATT: Nice!

ASHLEY: Let's see.

TRAVIS: (laughs) Second hit.

LAURA: Real proud of that!

ASHLEY: That would be-- That's a natural 18, so...

MATT: Yeah, it definitely hits.

TRAVIS: Put your sword away!

TALIESIN: Yeah, this is bad.

ASHLEY: Ooh, I'm going to reroll that. That's so much better. Okay, 18 points of damage for the second hit.

MATT: Nice, and you actually take 18 points of cold damage from your two melee strikes against it. As you strike across it with the blade, once again, that weird cold aura seems to be pulsing from between the armor plates and it hits you and you feel your limbs go numb temporarily and you have to shake them off as you back away from the attack.

ASHLEY: Augh!

MATT: Its essence seems to be freezing on the inside as well. So that finishes your go, Yasha. Caduceus, constitution taking throw.

SAM: Come on, Caduceus.

MARISHA: Big money.

TALIESIN: 14.

MARISHA: Fuck!

MATT: No, sorry. Jester, it's your turn.

LAURA: Polymorph!

SAM: Oh my god!

TALIESIN: Thank you!

TRAVIS: Let's go.

SAM: I love it.

MATT: (shrinking sound)

LAURA: But I'm not going to make it a bunny this time.

MATT: What are you making it?

LAURA: A turtle.

TRAVIS: Give it some hit points, if you want.

LAURA: Oh, right, because it's going to attack probably you, huh, again?

TRAVIS: Make it a polar bear.

LAURA: No!

MATT: What are you choosing?

LAURA: (stammers)

MATT: Going with turtle or something else?

LAURA: Oh, not a walrus, it's going to hurt.

TRAVIS: It's up to you.

LIAM: Less than a giant worm.

LAURA: A seal.

MATT: I-- 'kay.

SAM: Come on, where's your seal?

MATT: I bought a package of turtles.

LAURA: A turtle!

MATT: So your seal--

LAURA: I said a turtle!

TRAVIS: Not a snapping turtle.

LAURA: No, it's a regular turtle. I said turtle originally. He tried to talk me out of it.

TRAVIS: It likes Florida, it doesn't like this!

MATT: If you want it to be a seal, it'll just look like a turtle.

LAURA: I want it to be a turtle, Matt!

MARISHA: Snapping turtle!

TRAVIS: Not a snapping turtle!

LAURA: It's not a snapping turtle. It's a nice, friendly, Galapagos Island, old turtle.

MATT: Tortoise.

LAURA: A tortoise.

MATT: All right, you've got it.

LIAM: No seal, huh? What a failure.

TRAVIS: (laser buzzing)

MATT: All right.

LAURA: He looks like a tortoise.

MATT: That is Jester's turn.

LIAM: Oh, I love him.

TRAVIS: Why is he pointing at me?

MARISHA: He knows.

LIAM: Is that, like, a kid's toy turtle?

LAURA: He's so cute.

LIAM: He is cute.

MARISHA: Matt got, like, a bucket of animals not too long ago.

TRAVIS: (laughs) Sent to the house?

MATT: Yep. I'm like, they're Polymorphing into weird shit now, I'm just going to have a collection at the ready now.

TALIESIN: Is the armor still up, by the way, is the armor still going to do damage?

SAM: This should be a game, like we should just try to stump Matt.

MATT: No! No.

SAM: He's a platypus now, you got that one?

TALIESIN: We should get in front of the fucking-- ah!

TRAVIS: Yeah, yeah.

LIAM: I turn into an emu.

TRAVIS: Somebody grapple that fucking turtle.

MATT: Back to Amazon. I'm trying to order, like, way too many kids' toy packages. All right, that finishes Jester's go. Beau and Veth, roll constitution saving throws, please.

MARISHA: Nope.

SAM: 14.

MATT: Nope, both still stunned.

MARISHA: I rolled a four.

SAM: Nice.

TRAVIS: You guys, holy shit.

LIAM: Wow.

MATT: Caleb?

LIAM: Yeah.

LIAM: Um, it's con?

MATT: Constitution.

LIAM: Same as before-- oh wait. On con saves-- oh, I should have broken free last time. That's fine, I'll do it this time, because I get to add my proficiency because of my transmuter stone. So 19 plus five, 24.

MATT: You don't have the transmuter's stone as anything else? You have it just for the constitution bonus?

LIAM: Just for the con, that's how I always have it set to that.

MATT: All righty, so then now you break free.

LIAM: It was my brain fart last turn. I'll just let that go, but I'm back.

MATT: Got it, all right. You are no longer stunned.

SAM: Woohoo! We got two casters up.

MARISHA: DM, just to clarify, this is not included under a frightened or charmed ability, is it?

MATT: Correct. Correct.

MARISHA: You sure?

TRAVIS: (imitating Marisha) Are you sure?

MATT: It doesn't cause the frightened effect, doesn't cause the charmed effect. It literally just stuns you.

MARISHA: Okay, okay, okay.

TALIESIN: In an irritating electric net.

TRAVIS: It's a monk, it's a monk worm.

MATT: I can show you the sheet.

SAM: Prove it.

TRAVIS: We believe you.

MATT: Read The Explorer's Guide To Wildemount, that'll be the proof you need.

SAM: No, I can't read that, there's spoilers in there.

MATT: I told you what pages you can't read, you can read the rest of it.

SAM: I got to read the whole thing.

MATT: Fair enough, okay. Regardless. Caleb, you are now coming back to consciousness. All of a sudden you push out of the pain. You're up against the rock again. And you look around for the creature and it's nowhere to be seen.

LIAM: I can't do anything though, right?

MATT: No, that's the end of your turn. But just, it's gone. It's fucking gone.

TRAVIS: But you see this-- (turtle noise)

LIAM: Okay, there's Jester.

MATT: No, he doesn't see anything. That turtle's sunk in the snow.

TRAVIS: (turtle noises) (laughter)

MATT: All right. That brings us to Fjord, constitution.

TRAVIS: Nope.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: No, no! Doesn't he want to roll again?

MATT: Hmm?

LAURA: Doesn't he want to roll again? Isn't he stupid? To find out who he's attacking?

MATT: This is what he was facing before.

TALIESIN: It hurt, though.

MATT: Sure, sure. Let's roll again. Why not?

TALIESIN: I'm into it.

TRAVIS: But I'm making-- (turtle sound) sounds.

MARISHA: He hears the mating call.

TRAVIS: (turtle noise)

MATT: Roll a d20 for me.

TRAVIS: (turtle noise)

LAURA: Four.

MATT: Yeah, it's attacking Fjord. (laughter) If you rolled above a 10, I was going to say we'll go ahead and have it attack somebody else.

LAURA: Okay, hopefully it'll have more hit points, a tortoise. How many hit points does a tortoise have?

MATT: There is no specific... There is no bestiary input for turtle. So I'm just going to give it a standard plus three to hit. 15?

TRAVIS: Misses. (cheering)

TRAVIS: Hey, that's great!

MARISHA: You dodged a turtle, good for you.

TALIESIN: May we all dodge a turtle.

MATT: It just, like, bit at your heel, but it couldn't get through the armor and you're like-- All right, that finishes its turn. Yasha you're up. Caduceus. you're on deck.

ASHLEY: Okay, what I will do now is--

TRAVIS: Cut its head off.

ASHLEY: Oh, shoot I forgot to do "rest."

TALIESIN: Don't even fuck around, not funny.

ASHLEY: Okay, so I would like to... sorry, this is on the fritz a little bit. Here we go. Okay, so I'm going to do a-- what is it called? Zealous Presence as a bonus action, battle cry. All of the creatures of my choice, not all of them, 10 of them, but that's enough, advantage on attack rolls and saving throws.

TALIESIN: Hey, money money.

TRAVIS: Clutch!

ASHLEY: And then I just-- What are we doing, Jester?

LAURA: Just don't hit him!

ASHLEY: Should I pick him up and move him?

LAURA: Flip him over!

ASHLEY: Yeah, okay, so I'm going to go over and try to pick him up and put him on his back.

MATT: Okay, so you move over. Make an athletics check.

TALIESIN: You see a turtle in the snow storm, it's lying on his back. You don't help it, why?

ASHLEY: 22.

MATT: You beat its six. Yeah, as part of your shove attack, you turn it onto his back in the snow and it's now--

ASHLEY: Okay, and I'm going to turn his head away from Fjord. I'm going to try to turn him on his shell. (laughter)

MATT: There you go.

ASHLEY: And then I'm going to give-- I'm going to give him some scratches on his belly and just be like, what are we-- what are we doing?

LAURA: I think we just let him sit there for a little bit.

TRAVIS: I think the belly is a shell, right?

ASHLEY: No.

MATT: Yeah.

LAURA: He can feel it.

ASHLEY: It is?

MATT: Yeah, it's a shell, but it has sensitivity.

MARISHA: I don't know turtle life.

MATT: Does that finish your turn, Yasha?

ASHLEY: I just thought it was the top-- I'm done.

MATT: Caduceus, make a constitution saving throw with advantage.

TALIESIN: 17?

MATT: Nope.

TALIESIN: Jesus.

MATT: Sorry.

LAURA: I would like to picture a turtle, though, with no shell on the bottom, just like--

MATT: It would be Dagen, but he can't make his save. He keeps showing super low on his saving throw.

TALIESIN: Even with advantage?

MATT: He has a decent bonus. Even with the advantage, he rolled a four and a five. Next is Jester.

LAURA: I will go over and cast... that seems like-- I'm just going to go over and help Yasha pet his belly until everybody wakes up.

MATT: You've got it. There's now a dual turtle petting squad here in the middle of the snow.

LAURA: Maybe it'll calm him down. Calm down.

MATT: Roll animal handling.

TRAVIS: Yeah, yeah.

LAURA: Ooh, okay, okay, okay!

TALIESIN: I have-- no, no.

LAURA: Can I guidance myself?

MATT: Sure. Actually guidance is an action, so no.

LAURA: Oh, okay, well, that's not going to work. 10.

MATT: 10. You don't think it's calming.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: All right, that finishes Jester's go. That brings us to the top. Beau, Veth, make a constitution throw with advantage.

MARISHA: With advantage, why?

MATT: Because of Yasha's yell.

MARISHA: (gasps) You did the thing?

ASHLEY: I did the thing.

MARISHA: Oh my gosh, yes, yes! (excited noises) 22!

MARISHA: That's succeeds, you're free.

ASHLEY: Yes!

MARISHA: I rolled a five and a 19.

MATT: There you go, Beauregard. At the end of your turn, you are no longer stunned. All right.

SAM: Bit by bit.

ASHLEY: You also are correct, shells are just a part of their body. I trust you are correct.

LIAM: Plus they like the pizza.

SAM: That's true, they do.

TALIESIN: They had an awkward adolescence as well.

MATT: This is important to know.

MATT: All righty, Caleb.

LIAM: I crush a bit of catmint in my hands and a spectral Frumpkin appears for a second. Then giant cat claw's there. And I will use it to fly through the air over towards the snow, beyond the turtle and drag a bunch of snow up and sort of cement it into position with snow.

MATT: Okay, so you are covering the turtle with snow.

LAURA: But don't-- make sure it can still breathe!

MATT: Are you're traveling with the claw?

LIAM: No, I'm just getting, I'm just cementing and I'm creating a little tidal wave of snow over his body to hold him place.

TRAVIS: Little snow bank.

LIAM: So he can't do any roly poly stuff to flip over.

MATT: Fair enough.

TRAVIS: Tune into Critical Role for hard-hitting turtle violence. (laughter)

SAM: Soft-hitting. (laughter continues)

TRAVIS: What are you guys fighting?

MATT: It's now covered.

LAURA: Aww!

SAM: We're burying turtles in snow.

LIAM: Ooh, that's a beauty, that one!

TRAVIS: Do you have Epsom salt? Just pour it on there.

MATT: I have to get it from the back room.

SAM: Oh man, I saw the sickest shit on Critical Role last night.

ASHLEY: Dude, drop the handle of whoever made it.

LIAM: Caleb is such a killer.

MATT: Is that your turn? The cat's claw remains out here.

MARISHA: Oh, because you're stunned.

LIAM: Aw, there he is, little cat claw.

MATT: All right, that finishes your go, Caleb. Fjord, make a constitution save with advantage.

TRAVIS: Oh! Nope.

MARISHA: No? What? No!

TRAVIS: Nope.

MATT: All right.

TRAVIS: What, no!

MATT: The turtle is going to attempt to get out of the snow, with its athletics check. Oh! Oh, it actually rolled pretty--

LAURA: It got out of the snow?

MATT: It got out of the snow. But the snow is still rough terrain for it. Not that it has to move. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Persistent fucking turtle.

LIAM: Fucking turtle worm.

MARISHA: The snow is rough terrain.

TRAVIS: (turtle noise)

MATT: I would like Jester, Fjord, and Yasha to roll a d20 for me.

MATT: I would like Jester, Fjord, and Yasha to roll a d20 for me.

ASHLEY: Okay.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: Since it was turned around to see how it goes after.

TRAVIS: Two.

LAURA: Six.

ASHLEY: I rolled a one.

LAURA: (gasps) Me!

MATT: It goes after Jester.

LAURA: Oh, but I was rubbing your belly! I like you!

LIAM: (turtle chomping)

MATT: That is going to be a 14 to hit.

LAURA: I pull my ankle back.

MATT: Yep!

SAM: Expertly dodged. (laughter)

MATT: Yasha, it's your turn.

LIAM: No, don't do it.

ASHLEY: Okay, so I would like to now, at this point--

MATT: Riveting. (laughter)

TRAVIS: This is the real show.

MATT: You got on the board for five minutes, buddy.

TRAVIS: This is the real shit.

TALIESIN: Beautiful.

ASHLEY: I'm going to pick up the turtle. And just walk it as far away--

LAURA: Oh, walk it down to the ice!

ASHLEY: Oh yeah, I'll put him out on the ice. Just as far as I can walk.

MATT: You pick up the turtle.

TALIESIN: Hmm.

LAURA: You think he'll fall through?

MARISHA: He'll be fine.

TALIESIN: I assume everything is going to be terrible.

TRAVIS: It's really cold out here.

ASHLEY: I know, I'm really nervous.

TRAVIS: It's so fucking cold.

MATT: Are you just dropping him onto the ice or you staying at the edge and sliding him?

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah, yeah, shuffleboard him.

ASHLEY: Very gently, I'm going to lay him on the back. So he's a little slippery and then just push him away.

MATT: Sure, so I'll consider it a grapple attack for the first one. Go ahead and make an athletics check for me, just to make sure you can grapple it.

SAM: You have a broom?

MARISHA: Yeah, we're curling the turtle.

LIAM: Yasha invented hockey. Canon.

MATT: Curtling.

ASHLEY: 17.

MATT: Yeah, you pick him up and move him over there and then you let him loose and he slides a little bit. (laughter)

SAM: Saddest combat.

ASHLEY: Okay, do we--

MARISHA: This fight is ridiculous.

ASHLEY: Let me see if there's anything else I can do.

TRAVIS: Let's spin him. We don't know which way he's facing.

ASHLEY: Yeah, I'll really just give him a good--

MATT: Yeah, he's like-- I can't do that here. (laughter)

MATT: That's as far as it can go. (cheering)

MATT: But imagine it's still going.

LAURA: It really looks like, Matt, it looks like it's ice, so it's really fucking with us.

MATT: Imagination. All right, Caduceus, make your saving throw not advantage because that is faded.

TRAVIS: Oh, fuck.

ASHLEY: Come on.

TALIESIN: 20.

MATT: That'll do. (cheering)

MATT: You are no longer stunned.

MARISHA: Oh my goodness.

MATT: That finishes your turn.

MARISHA: Wait, has Dagen been rolling?

MATT: He has been, he's next.

MARISHA: Okay.

MATT: There we go, that does it. He breaks free of the stun as well. Angrily shakes it off in his chair. "All right, where the fuck is it?"

ASHLEY: He's out on the ice. He's a turtle now.

TALIESIN: Not for super long, either, so we should probably--

MATT: He looks really confused, goes, "Sure." That brings us to Jester.

TALIESIN: Bless?

LAURA: Do I have Bless?

TALIESIN: I don't know, do you?

LAURA: No.

TALIESIN: Oh, never mind.

LAURA: Yeah, I'm going to just go-- I'm not going to waste a spell right now, hopefully. I'm just going to go out to the edge of the ice with Yasha and watch the turtle spin.

SAM: Is that a metaphor?

MATT: All stand there at the edge, looking at this poor little turtle, just doing slow 360s.

TRAVIS: Yasha, you watching the turtle?

ASHLEY: That's like one of those weird Scandinavian things, like you've planted too many potatoes.

MATT: You spun too many turtles. All right, that finishes Jester's go. Beau and Veth.

SAM: Oh, you're already free.

MARISHA: I'm good.

MATT: Without advantage.

SAM: Oh, without advantage? I will roll again.

MATT: Yeah, that's passed off.

SAM: 13.

MATT: No, you're still stunned.

MARISHA: I walk over to the edge of the ice and join the other ladies in watching the turtle spin, I guess. I'll go on the far side of Caleb. The other side of Caleb, go that way, yeah.

MATT: Get you about there.

MARISHA: 'Sup?

LAURA: We're just-- in case he turns back, we're prepared.

MARISHA: It's a good idea.

MATT: You got it, all right. That finishes their go. Caleb, whatcha doing?

LIAM: Veth, you already did your--?

SAM: I'm paralyzed still.

LIAM: I just get a little more of that iron powder, but I crunch it down and try to shrink the turtle to tiny size, so that's a wisdom save.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: As a turtle.

MARISHA: That won't hurt the turtle?

LAURA: Oh, just so he won't fall through the ice, that's good.

MATT: It rolled a 17.

LIAM: Failed.

MATT: Well, and it's minus three, so definitely failed. I don't have a smaller turtle.

TRAVIS: Matt? (laughter)

SAM: You know--

MATT: Yeah?

TRAVIS: Yeah?

MATT: Hey, Travis.

LIAM: Do you have, like, a BB or--?

SAM: Hey Matt, you know how when you're spinning--

LIAM: The head of a mini?

SAM: You know how when you're spinning and you bring your arms in and you go faster? Because the turtle's smaller, does it start to spin faster?

MATT: Oh yeah, it's spinning a lot quicker now. (whirring) Remember the tiny orb of death in the first campaign? It's like that, but with legs. (laughter)

TRAVIS: (screams)

MATT: I'm trying to--

LIAM: It's only like this for a minute.

TRAVIS: I love that you're searching for a smaller--

MATT: Here.

LIAM: Turtle for an hour, tiny turtle for a minute.

MATT: This piece of glitter is the turtle. (laughter)

TRAVIS: That fucking shot is amazing!

MARISHA: Yeah! (laughter)

MARISHA: Zoom in on that glitter.

MATT: Epic confrontations, the high level rounds of Dungeons & Dragons!

MARISHA: Yeah, there we go. Zoom in on that glitter with those PTZs. Yeah, yeah!

SAM: Level 13 D&D.

MATT: Yeah, all right. So Fjord, go ahead and roll, man.

TRAVIS: Oh, yeah.

TALIESIN: Oh, wait, do I have a--

MATT: That was Caleb's turn.

TRAVIS: Hey, 24! (cheering)

MATT: All righty.

MARISHA: How far into the minute are we?

SAM: You guy could probably just pick me up and leave.

MATT: We're six rounds into it now.

LAURA: I don't think you have to roll after Yasha.

MARISHA: Six rounds in, okay.

LAURA: You probably should roll again, shouldn't you?

TALIESIN: No, I'm fine, I just--

MATT: It'll come back to his in a moment.

LAURA: Okay. All right, so now it's the turtle's turn. Yeah, it gets up.

TRAVIS: (laughs) Turn over the glitter.

LIAM: Thank you for adjusting it for us.

MARISHA: (laughs) He just flipped the glitter.

MATT: I want Jester, Yasha, Caleb, and Beau to roll a d20, please.

TRAVIS: I actually lost sight of it a little bit.

MATT: It's on my hand.

TRAVIS: Oh. (laughs)

MARISHA: Oh shit.

LAURA: Nine!

MARISHA: Natural 20.

SAM: Oh boy, Beau, he's going for you.

LAURA: Coming for you, Beau.

LIAM: Better get that Patient Defense going.

MARISHA: Oh boy. It's stuck to your finger.

MATT: Oh wow! 20?

MARISHA: Miss.

TRAVIS: Trying to picture it.

LIAM: Just put her foot back two inches.

MARISHA: Yeah, I just pick it up.

TRAVIS: We probably could just grab Veth.

MATT: You're just hold it with your toe.

LAURA: Yeah, at this point.

MATT: It can't quite get to you.

LAURA: Also you were also stunned, though..

TRAVIS: Right, thank you.

MATT: That brings us to Yasha.

ASHLEY: It's already my turn, okay. What do I do, should we just go?

LAURA: Can we just pick up Veth and we'll just keep walking?

ASHLEY: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

LIAM: Jog on out of here?

ASHLEY: I'm going to grab Veth.

MARISHA: It's Polymorphed for an hour, right?

LIAM and ASHLEY: Yeah.

ASHLEY: Fireman's carry Veth, and then we'll start walking.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: Lets do it.

MATT: For the sake of brevity--

SAM: No, we want to play it out.

MATT: This incredibly dangerous encounter--

TRAVIS: Baby turtle.

MATT: -- has ended in the climactic finish of you carrying your stunned halfling friend as Dagen goes, "All right, I don't know what the fuck you people are, but thanks. Let's go." As you all leave the slowly walking, angry turtle, it's slipping on ice.

LAURA: You'll turn back, he'll be okay.

LIAM: (squeaky voice) That's right, you better run!

TALIESIN: We have made an enemy for life.

TRAVIS: A dragon turtle and a purple worm.

LAURA: We make a lot of enemies.

MATT: This has certainly been added with ferocity to the encounter list now because it has a double reason to hunt you, but we'll see what you guys roll in the future.

LAURA: Oh no.

TALIESIN: Oh no.

MARISHA: "Added with ferocity."

TRAVIS: As long as I'm not rolling, we should be fine.

LAURA: Oh god!

MATT: It'll be fine. Just Polymorph him again next time.

TALIESIN: Modify Memory.

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah, yeah. You never saw us, turtle, you never saw us.

MATT: Yeah, that was awesome. That was really well done.

TRAVIS: Yeah, we would've been fucked otherwise.

TALIESIN: It was the Tomb Takers. The Tomb Takers did that. Run!

MATT: All righty, so.

MARISHA: Wow.

TRAVIS: Seven on one, one on worm.

TALIESIN: That was clutch.

MATT: Continuing with as intense a speed, as you can with Dagen leading the charge, while weather is still good. You guys feel comfortable enough over the next hour or so that you've gotten a fair amount of distance before Dagen goes, "Not going to lie, that was-- it was pretty funny. I've seen those beasts only once before, and yeah, killed a lot of people. I only got away because I-- well, hid in the snow and didn't move."

LAURA: Wow.

MATT: "But, um, I think turning it into a tiny turtle works well."

LAURA: That's a good thing.

MATT: "How long's that last?"

LAURA: An hour.

MATT: "How long's it been?"

LAURA: (high-pitched) An hour.

MATT: "Let's keep going." You continue on for the remainder of the day, your second day of travel, following the tracks northward. Now, if you are to continue on this path, you now choose whether to continue to follow the tracks, which are heading around the bend, avoiding Allowak's Sanctuary, going on the side of the fire river, or attempt to go through the realm of Allowak's Sanctuary and take a different path, possibly, based on what you were talking about. But it's your call.

SAM: If we went through, would we get ahead of them?

LAURA: Does it seem shorter to go through the sanctuary?

TRAVIS: No, I don't think so. But again, it's just a map.

LAURA: Again, yeah, the yetis might know a faster passage through the mountains or something.

TALIESIN: I got a crazy idea. How's the weather?

TRAVIS: Right now?

MATT: Right now it's okay.

TALIESIN: How many of us could fly?

LIAM: Yeah, want to go over?

TALIESIN: And just take an hour of flight, for as long as the weather holds.

TRAVIS: We're making the move, huh? We're going to pass now?

TALIESIN: I mean, it'll speed us up a bit.

MARISHA: And we are for sure trying to go to A2? We're not going to try and sidetrack to A4; A2 is the goal.

TALIESIN: I thought we were going to stop by to stop and talk to Essek.

MARISHA: Essek is further.

LAURA: Essek is so far up.

TALIESIN: Okay.

MARISHA: A2 is still along the way, unless we deviate completely.

TRAVIS: Well, A2 is technically further away than Aeor is. I mean, by a little bit. And A2's on this side of the lava river, We wouldn't have to cross.

TALIESIN: So maybe we don't cross, then.

TRAVIS: If we want to go to A2.

MARISHA: But we have to cross the lava river eventually, right?

TRAVIS: No, not to get to A2.

MARISHA: Not to get to A2, but to get to Aeor, we would have to. So we're going to have to, one way or the other.

TALIESIN: Just depends on where we want to go to first.

MARISHA: It feels like it's between A2 and A4, right?

TRAVIS: Yeah, the lava river literally splits A2 and Aeor.

LAURA: Anybody want to flip a coin?

SAM: I vote A2.

TRAVIS: Is there a reason?

SAM: That's where they're going.

LIAM: That's where they're going. We could maybe try to beat them there and get what they're after, and--

LAURA: Try to leave before they show up?

MARISHA: If we go to A2, I don't see any point in going unless we try and beat them there.

SAM: For sure.

MARISHA: Or we deviate and we go to A4 and we don't have competition.

SAM: Do we know how big A4 is? Because like, if it's gigantic, we won't even know what to look for.

TALIESIN: The only reason we'll know what to look for, is when they decide they have it. I could--

TRAVIS: We can do it. We should also just see if we're being watched before we do it, because we make the move, they'll know.

ASHLEY: But how do we know that they're not going to-- We know that they're going to A2.

TALIESIN: We want to make sure they're going to A2, We want to see if we're not being watched. What else do we need to know?

LIAM: I feel like we should assume that we will be seen no matter what we do and we just book it.

LAURA: Divine Intervention.

MATT: Make the roll.

SAM: This is it, this is the one.

MATT: What is it you want from the intervention?

LAURA: I want--

SAM: To win.

LAURA: I want to know.

TRAVIS: ♪ I want to know what love is ♪

LAURA: I want to know if it's wiser to go to A4. If we'll find something to beat the Tomb Takers at their game.

MARISHA: Come on, Traveler, you piece of shit.

LAURA: Don't call him that!

TRAVIS: Artagan.

MARISHA: Sorry. Come on, Artagan, you piece of shit.

LAURA: I'm looking for my percentile. Where is it? Here it is, okay. Nope!

TALIESIN: Can we think of a third question?

TRAVIS: Oh.

LAURA: Oh!

SAM: Third question?

LAURA: Oh, communing.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Right. Should we head to A2? What would the second one be?

TALIESIN: Are they going to A2? Are we being watched?

MARISHA: Are there threshold crests at A4 or A2? Because we know Molly is going-- Lucien is going to A2.

TALIESIN: Is there a threshold crest?

LIAM: Remind me why we think A4 instead of Aeor itself?

LAURA: Because I think Aeor is the final goal.

LIAM: Wouldn't that be to alpha and then alpha and then Aeor being alpha?

TRAVIS: A4 is further east, keep saying Aeor.

LAURA: Yeah, to alpha and alpha

LIAM: Right. So why A4?

LAURA: Because A4 might have another special--

TRAVIS: No, it's under Foren, it's further east from those two. Before Aeor and A2, are the one we're heading towards.

MARISHA: Right.

TRAVIS: And A4 is, like, to the east.

TALIESIN: All right, I'm going to roll a Commune.

MATT: All righty.

TALIESIN: I'm just going to dig myself a little hole in the snow. Breathe deep. And once it's taking hold: Are the Tomb Takers heading to A2?

MATT: As you close your eyes, the cold seems to subside momentarily, and... as you exhale, you feel the warm breath almost drawn out of you, not in a suffocating way, but in a guided way. And the breath seems to draw you in a north-northwestern direction.

TALIESIN: Have they been watching us?

MATT: As you inhale once more the freezing cold air that you've been... accustomed to inhaling, begins to lose its cold temperature and become almost beachside warm.

SAM: Is that a yes or a no?

LIAM: That's a yes.

MARISHA: Wait, so both were warm?

MATT: Both were warm.

TALIESIN: Does one of these threshold crests that they're looking for exist at A4?

MATT: The air doesn't-- it reverts to a colder temperature but not the freezing temperature that hurts the lungs.

TALIESIN: That was the wrong question, it's unclear. I don't necessarily know if they're collecting those or--?

TRAVIS: Something else?

TALIESIN: It wasn't a yes or a no, it was just, it was the wrong question. I don't think they're collecting threshold crests. I think they're collecting things. I don't know, that's my thought.

TRAVIS: We are being watched?

TALIESIN: We are.

TRAVIS: Do we--

SAM: There's no way to protect against that?

TALIESIN: Not that I can think of.

LAURA: I mean, I have this on.

LIAM: It could be happening at any time and we don't know when.

MARISHA: Those are the only three questions you get, it's not five?

MATT: Five is Speak with Dead.

TALIESIN: Five is Speak with Dead, three is speak with god.

LAURA: Is it time to talk to...

TALIESIN: One more day, I think.

LIAM: One more day.

LAURA: Okay.

SAM: ♪ One more day! ♪

MATT: All right.

TRAVIS: I could look... and see.

LAURA: Look and see what?

TRAVIS: If something is successfully watching us, or you. Should I try that?

SAM: What, like See Invisibility? Sure, yeah.

TRAVIS: All right. I'll take the sword and I'll cast See Invisibility.

MATT: Okay, glancing on the space around you, you do not see any sign of a similar scrying beacon.

TRAVIS: It actually seems clear right now.

TALIESIN: I think they probably poke in on us on occasion.

LAURA: The same way that I do, yeah.

TRAVIS: Be a good time to make a move then.

TALIESIN: I think we need help, it's my feeling.

LAURA: Talk to Essek?

TALIESIN: It's my feeling, is we need help.

TRAVIS: Essek is far away from A2.

LIAM: Well, if they're going to A2 and we could try to beat them there, figure out what it is they're after there, take it, once we do that, we are daring them to attack, but we could take whatever we find straight to Aeor, which is where Essek is, correct? He's on the edge of it.

TRAVIS: Yes.

SAM: If we can do all that, that would be amazing.

TALIESIN: Lucien may continue to play it as a game, too, and just see how many of these things that we'll get for him.

LIAM: That's true.

TALIESIN: As long as we're all taking it to the same place, I doubt it really even matters to him who has what, if it ends up where it needs to be.

TRAVIS: Are we flying?

SAM: Can we fly?

MATT: Flying only lasts for 10 minutes.

LIAM: Polymorph.

LAURA: Polymorph.

MATT: Polymorph would help, yeah.

LAURA: I mean.

TALIESIN: If we're crossing the river.

LAURA: If we're crossing the river.

TRAVIS: For A2 we don't need to cross.

LIAM: But even if we aren't crossing the river, I thought the idea was to try to gain pace for a bit. Yeah, I could do that...

LAURA: Be fast.

LIAM: -- a couple of times, too. We could fly, pause and re-up and...

TALIESIN: As long as we don't want to burn everything we have in case something happens.

TRAVIS: Let's fly.

MARISHA: Okay.

TRAVIS: Who can do what, how are we doing it?

LIAM: All right, this is the plan for now, for this moment?

MARISHA: I guess we're going to A2, trying to beat them there.

LIAM: All right. (whoosh) Giant eagle.

TRAVIS: And you can carry two?

LIAM: Yeah.

LAURA: If I Polymorph two people will we all be able to travel?

SAM: We got to bring Dagen, too.

LAURA: Yeah.

LAURA: You can carry two?

TRAVIS: Ah, Dagen!

LAURA: That's okay, two, two, two.

TALIESIN: Two, two, two. That should work.

LAURA: Okay, then I will use my... Ring of Spell-Splitting.

MATT: All righty.

LAURA: Do you want to be an eagle?

ASHLEY: Yeah!

LAURA: I'm going to cast Polymorph on me and Yasha.

MATT: All righty, and with that, you have three giant eagles at your disposal. Who's riding with who?

LIAM: I start sidling up to Dagen. (eagle cry and wings flutter)

TALIESIN: Yasha, do you mind?

MATT: "Man, your tricks are all kinds of weird, but I like your style."

LIAM: And I grab his ride and then--

MATT: (screams nervously) "Up! Up?"

MARISHA: Just screaming "up."

LAURA: Fjord and Veth, here we go!

MATT: All righty.

ASHLEY: (eagle cawing)

MATT: And with that, the three eagles push into the light snow as the evening grows on. The final hour of your night's travel will be through the air, with the fading light probably helping you from possibly garnishing the attention of those you're supposed to be following. And we'll pick up from there next week. (oohing)

MARISHA: Flying off into the sunset.

TRAVIS: Good recovery, good recovery. Good turtle.

ASHLEY: Oh man, that was so funny.

MATT: Man, that was fucking hilarious.

MARISHA: So funny.

MATT: That was hilarious.

LAURA: We all got group stunned.

MATT: I'm not going to lie, I was a little worried when that happened. I was like, "Oh!"

ASHLEY: Uh-oh.

MATT: Okay yeah, that was a full Ashley Johnson "uh-oh." (laughter)

TALIESIN: Fucking Jester MVP in that shit.

TRAVIS: Yeah!

TALIESIN: Fuck, man!

MATT: Mind you, a part of me was-- I was excited for the carnage.

LIAM: Me too.

MATT: But that was fucking hilarious and very clever, well done.

TALIESIN: Oh god. I had a heart attack.

LIAM: And just culminating in a piece of glitter on the map.

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: (laughs)

MARISHA: That he moved to attack me.

LIAM: Oh, it flipped.

SAM: It flipped upside down for some reason.

TALIESIN: I just feel like that's a metaphor for something, but I'm not sure what.

MARISHA: (laughs) Yeah.

MATT: I like to imagine he didn't have the movement to get to you, but because it was ice he just, like, coasted part of the way. And then-- (small stepping) Anyway. All right, well, we'll pick up from there not next week because we have Thanksgiving next week, but the week after that. All right then. Well, guys, have a wonderful time. We love you very much. And, is it Thursday yet? Good night!

(cheering)