Transcript:The Ruined Sliver

List of Transcripts

Pre-Show
MATT: Hello everyone, and welcome to tonight's episode of Critical Role, where a bunch of us nerdy-ass voice actors sit around and play Dungeons & Dragons.

ALL: (hollering) We play Dungeons & Dragons!

MATT: Before-- before we jump into-- why is it every episode? And it's still the most ridiculous thing. Before we jump into tonight's episode, we have some announcements to get through beginning with the first of our two sponsors, Ravensburger, Sam.

SAM: We love Ravensburger so much-- (laughter) that we've almost learned how to say their name. But no matter how you say it, their new game Wonder Woman: Challenge of the Amazons is a must have. The Amazon tribe of warriors have lived in peace for centuries on Themyscira. I think that's how you say that.

TRAVIS: It is.

SAM: But now enemies have invaded and it's up to you to defend the island against Ares, the Cheetah, or Circe. To celebrate their new game, Ravensburger, maybe, sent me Wonder Woman's actual golden Lariat of Truth.

ASHLEY: What?!

SAM: Amazing. Yeah. And tonight, I'm going to see if it works. Get ready, Ash.

ASHLEY: Oh!

TRAVIS: Nope. (laughter)

ASHLEY: Phew, I'm so glad it didn't work.

SAM: (grunts) (cheering)

ASHLEY: Oh no, please no. Don't do it.

SAM: Okay!

LAURA: Oh god.

SAM: Ashley is now-- oh boy. You okay, over there?

ASHLEY: Yeah.

SAM: Stunts! Ashley is now in a trance of truth. Everything she says must be the truth. Let's test it out with an easy one. Ashley, please state your name.

ASHLEY: Ashley Marsupial Bernadette Russell Crowe Von Chex Mix W Johnson the 24th.

SAM: Very truthful; it works. All right, Ashley, tell me about the new Wonder Woman game.

ASHLEY: It's a cooperative game for two to five players. Where are you strategize, face foes, and rise to meet the challenge of the Amazons together.

SAM: Very truthful indeed. Now for a little fun. Okay, let's play some Kiss, Marry, Kill. Between Brian Foster, Laura Bailey, and Matt Mercer. Who would you rather kiss? Who would you rather marry? And who would you rather kill?

ASHLEY: Kiss Laura Bailey, marry Brian W. Foster, kill Sam Riegel.

SAM: Oh.

TALIESIN: Harsh, but fair.

SAM: Okay, that was not one of the options so that's weird. Let's just try it again. Kiss, Marry, Kill: Marisha, Liam, and Taliesin in this time.

ASHLEY: Kill Sam Riegel, drive the body to the Brown Mountain Dam in the Angeles Forest, dump it in the creek behind the dam because no one ever looks there.

SAM: Okay, okay, we're going to stop that right now. (laughter) Yeah, maybe we should just wrap it up. The game includes five paintable Amazon miniatures, including Diana and is available where games are sold in the US. Enter for your chance to win the game at @RavenburgerNA on Twitter. They're giving away 10 copies right now, or buy yours at bitly/WWChallengeOfTheAmazons and thanks to Ravensburger. Back to you, Matt.

MATT: Thank you Sam and thank you, Ravensburger--

TRAVIS: Sam shared that info.

MATT: -- for supporting. Yeah, of course. Second sponsor tonight, our returning friends since the beginning of this campaign at D&D Beyond.

TRAVIS: ? D&D Beyond! ? (cheering)

MATT: They actually just launched their new character app, which is pretty rad. It gives you the chance to track your characters from the palm of your hand, wherever you are. It's on the phone now, which is really, really fricking useful, actually. All your character stats, spell slots, equipment, everything else about your character is now editable within the app character sheet. And it's always being updated with new features, which is awesome. You can get it now for Android or Apple and check out more at dndbeyond.link/CRapp.

SAM: Wait, C R app?

MATT: Yes.

SAM: Does that spell crap?

MARISHA: It totally does.

MATT: Yes, it does.

MARISHA: It's crahp.

MATT and LAURA: Crahp.

SAM: My hat's off to you, D&D Beyond, that was an excellent trolling of us.

MATT: Yes. (laughter)

ASHLEY: Grand.

MATT: It's pretty great. Marisha, you had some announcements.

MARISHA: Yes. Join us on Twitch on Tuesday, August 4th at 4:00pm Pacific for Mini Primetime After Dark, which is a special one-off that we created with all of the mini painting footage from when we were making Mini Primetime, because we shot all those minis in their entirety. It's actually something that we wanted to do a really long time ago. But now thanks to quarantine, we had time to put it together. Yeah, it's super chill vibes, mini painting, eye candy. And, of course, the VOD will be available on YouTube the following Thursday. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Nice.

MARISHA: Yeah, I did it.

MATT: I believe, oh! I believe those are all the announcements we have tonight.

TRAVIS: Yeah, yeah, no big deal.

MATT: So let's go ahead and jump into tonight's episode of Critical Role.

(dramatic sound effects) (water bubbling) (thunder rumbling) (explosion) ♪ Role ♪ ♪ Critical Role ♪ ♪ Critical Role ♪ ♪ Mighty Nein ♪ ♪ Roll the dice ♪ ♪ The adventure begins ♪ ♪ They were always beside you ♪ ♪ Your nerdy best friends ♪ ♪ And the DM to guide you ♪ ♪ And they rise from the flames ♪ ♪ For the battles ahead ♪ ♪ Villains beware 'cause you're 'bout to be dead ♪ ♪ They got magic and flair ♪ ♪ They got falchions and cunning ♪ ♪ They don't see over there ♪ ♪ There's a monster incoming ♪ ♪ Inspiration is waiting ♪ ♪ Rise up, don't think twice ♪ ♪ Put your fate in your hands ♪ ♪ Take a chance, roll the dice ♪ ♪ Critical Role (roll the dice) ♪ ♪ Critical Role (roll the dice) ♪ ♪ Ooh, aah ♪ ♪ Can you answer the call ♪ ♪ Dig in deep in your soul ♪ ♪ As the legend unfolds ♪ ♪ Now it's your turn ♪ ♪ Your turn ♪ ♪ To roll ♪ (flames whooshing)

Part I
MATT: Welcome back. So. Last we left off: The Mighty Nein, upon arriving in Rumblecusp in hopes of setting up Traveler Con in the next week or so. You've met some individuals. You've discovered that the people that already exist here on the island have lost their memories, it seems, and have come to enjoy a rather simple life here in the village of Vo in the shadow of some sort of a fire god known as Vokodo. You, with the help of one of their druidic spiritual leaders, traveled to meet with this Vokodo, and seemed to have suspicions that it's not a god, but some sort of, malicious entity that is itself affecting and controlling this island, robbing memories and requiring those that live here to bring all their goods and precious things as gifts, to mine from the island and gift everything to this entity. You managed to make your way out after making some offerings to it. (coughs) Pardon me. Through the use of a Greater Restoration spell, returned the memories of the druid leader that you had traveling with you, discovering that they were named Vilya, apparently from another continent known as Tal'Dorei. You then, together as a team, transformed some of you into birds and began to fly across the island for faster and mostly safer travel. Making your way towards the eastern side, where the Heaven's Falls exist. A little bit of a bumpy landing, but nevertheless, you found yourselves searching the exterior of these falls and coming to a night's rest. The next morning, some of you did begin to lose your memory, but after cleansing these with spells, you began to inspect the falls. Some pearls were found, some accidents were had. But after briefly separating the falls themselves and discovering the illusion behind it you found a cavern which held numerous, numerous boats and ships from all different ages there, crowded and left in the shadows. As you began to inspect the interior of this cavern Fjord, you noticed what looked to be the entrance to a torchbloom-covered subterranean water tunnel. Caduceus, you went to inspect it and found yourself suddenly affected by some sort of strange compulsion to find out what's at the end of these tunnels.

TALIESIN: I remember.

MATT: You began swimming feverishly into it. (laughter) Fjord, you attempted to stop him through multiple grapples and spells thrown.

TRAVIS: I really tried.

MATT: You were left blinded and kicked backward as Caduceus thus has vanished from your grasp, eyes left to darkness. As you swam to the surface and shouted for aid--

TRAVIS: In a super macho voice.

MATT: Yeah, straight up.

TRAVIS: (high-pitched) Help!

MATT: The rest of you guys, hearing this, gather towards Fjord to discover how best to deal with the recently vanished Caduceus. And that is where we left off. So as you all now begin to make your way towards Fjord, what are you doing?

LAURA: What's going on, what's happening, Fjord?

TRAVIS: Oh, did we not establish that at the end of the last game?

SAM: I don't think so.

TRAVIS: Caduceus was, seems like he was compelled. He just kept swimming towards the creature. I think it's what happened last time. We have to go after him!

LAURA: Oh no, so he's out there by himself!

LIAM: The way, point the way.

TRAVIS: Okay, okay, okay, okay, so.

LAURA: You're not blind any more, right?

TRAVIS: No, I can see. Somebody made me not, somebody made me not blind.

MARISHA: Holy shit.

TRAVIS: ? Somebody made me not blind. ?

LAURA: I think Vilya made him not blind. Vilya made him not blind.

MATT: Yes.

LAURA: Yes, okay.

TRAVIS: You have fast monk shit, right?

MARISHA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Okay, you have fast wizard shit.

LIAM: In a pinch, ja.

TRAVIS: Okay, so in the water, who has the fastest speeds? Because we should send like two people after him.

LAURA: I can cast Freedom of Movement.

MARISHA: I'm pretty sure--

SAM: What does that mean, what does that do?

TRAVIS: What does that make your max speed in the water?

LAURA: Hold on, let me get to my spells.

MARISHA: And then you can cast--

LAURA: Freedom of Movement, I can cast on--

MARISHA: Uh huh, uh huh.

LIAM: He's going.

MATT: Yeah, I'm taking this away as we're--

LAURA: Oh god, go!

LIAM: Let's just retreat. And I'm swimming--

MARISHA: How many times can you do that?

LIAM: -- towards the direction--

LAURA: I'm just going to cast it on you, Freedom of Movement.

SAM: What does it do, what does it do?

LIAM: I can only do it once it's concentration.

LAURA: No, it's not.

LIAM: No, me.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: She's swimming already!

LAURA: You get no penalty for water.

MARISHA: No penalty movement. Move, action to move. Step of the Wind.

MATT: Okay, so first, so you cast the spell. While you are swimming. You feel suddenly the resistance of the water give way and it is just like pushing through air. However, you're able to grab handholds almost as you swim forward. It's odd, and you just begin coasting through the water without resistance. So that takes away there, you were casting Expeditious Retreat.

LIAM: Expeditious Retreat, yeah.

MATT: Okay. You have been moving double movement this whole time, heading through the tunnels, which at this point puts you at 120. So you guys get within-- both of you are giving chase here?

LIAM: Yeah, yeah.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: Fjord, you're not?

TRAVIS: I thought we all talked about deciding who had the fastest speed, but we're just doing shit, I guess.

LAURA: Well, she has a lot of speed.

TRAVIS: So have fun. (laughter)

LAURA: He's ticking down the clock! We don't have time to talk!

TRAVIS: Sure.

TALIESIN: Been fun.

SAM: Fjord, are you going to go in after them?

TRAVIS: No. These fucking yahoos could go. It's cool.

SAM: They can't even see the dark, they're humans.

LAURA: She can see.

TRAVIS: I was trying to--

MARISHA: I can see.

TRAVIS: -- talk stuff out, but let's just shoot.

LAURA: He said he was counting our clock.

LIAM: Aren't the plants phosphorescent?

MATT: They are. It's easy to see once you go beneath the surface. Which you can see, though, it is dark beneath here.

TRAVIS: Enjoy my cookie. (laughter)

MARISHA: I am trucking, I am going.

MATT: All right, so how fast can you go in one round?

MARISHA: 150 feet.

MATT: Okay.

ASHLEY: Damn.

SAM: Whoa.

MATT: Monks.

LAURA: Yeah, because I cast Freedom of Movement. So she gets no water penalty.

MARISHA: I get no penalties.

MATT: So you are--

LIAM: I can do 90, but that's halved and I don't have Freedom of Movement.

MATT: Right, so 45. So you're trailing a little bit behind.

LIAM: Oh yeah.

MATT: But you will be catching up. Okay. And everyone else is staying behind?

LAURA: We're going to swim up, but not get close. I don't want to get within the range that we got before.

MATT: Okay, so the rest of you guys keep an exterior radius?

LIAM: And my goal, I don't know what the tunnels look like, but if it's a straight shot and I could see a long way, I'm not going to go in. If it winds away and I can't see past the bend, I guess I'll--

MATT: It's a little windy. Like, you can't-- it's not like this continuous straight tunnel.

LIAM: So we don't, okay.

SAM: I mean, someone should go in after them, in case they both get mind controlled like Caduceus, right?

MARISHA: If you save from it, because I've saved from it before, do I have to save from it again?

MATT: Yes, you do.

MARISHA: Okay.

MATT: So the two people that are going into that space, which would be Caleb and Beauregard, I need you both to make a wisdom saving throws, please.

MARISHA: All right, come on.

TRAVIS: We had a whole text thread about this.

MARISHA: Come on.

LAURA: Then go.

MARISHA: I don't want to fuck this up.

SAM: I think you should go.

TRAVIS: Oh, that wasn't the point, the point is to limit the number of people going after him.

LAURA: That's what we were doing.

TRAVIS: Just two people, yeah.

TRAVIS: But you're the only person that can help any of them.

LAURA: And everybody said I should stay back. I'm staying back.

SAM: Jester, you should go.

LIAM: 17.

MATT: 17, okay.

SAM: Let's change the plan, let's change the plan.

MARISHA: 22.

MATT: Okay, both of you guys feel this strange wave of influence pass over your mind and you push forward. It does not take hold or effect.

MARISHA: Fuck you, blooms, fuck you!

SAM: Fuck you, Steve Blum.

MARISHA: No, I love you, Steve Blum, but fuck you, torchblooms.

MARISHA: So you get about 80 feet in there and you see it split into two different directions. You do not have sight on Caduceus. You're catching up now, you're a little ways into the tunnel. Caduceus does move ahead.

MARISHA: Fjord, Fjord, which way?

LIAM: We're so far away from him.

MARISHA: I go to the left.

MATT: I mean, he can hear you because it is water, but it's very difficult to make out the language at this distance necessarily.

LAURA: Call for Caduceus!

MARISHA: (yelling) Caduceus!

MATT: Go ahead and make a perception check for me.

MARISHA: Shit, balls, tits.

LIAM: Went left, though, right?

LAURA: Well, depending.

MARISHA: Natural 20!

MATT: Which is a total of?

MARISHA: Natural roll 20, 24.

MATT: Some good rolls.

MARISHA: Best Buy!

MATT: Paying attention, you look at the two different paths in front of you and you can see the torchblooms on the right hand side are swaying slightly, like the recent water has been disturbed.

MARISHA: Okay, okay, I'll head to the right, the right.

MATT: So you go ahead and follow that side.

TALIESIN: Dragon Slayer shit right here.

MATT: You are just swimming as hard as you can without noticing Beauregard quickly enough, because you can with the aid of that spell--

MARISHA: Thank you, Jessie.

MATT: -- immediately curve up and over and you can see Caduceus up ahead. You can catch up without issue. You have gotten a little ways in. You reach that same intersection.

LIAM: Do I see her?

MATT: I would say you-- you're far enough away from her where you can just catch enough of her shift as she exits that space. So you do-- you are able to follow the path that she's taking. So Beauregard, you manage to catch up to Caduceus. What are you doing?

MARISHA: Caduceus?

TALIESIN: Hey!

MARISHA: Whack!

TALIESIN: (exclaims)

MARISHA: I'm cracking him over the head, Stunning Strike.

MATT: Okay, go ahead and roll an attack.

MARISHA: Okay.

MARISHA: Sorry, Cad.

MATT: With no disadvantage, because you have Freedom of Movement.

MARISHA: Perfect, 23.

MATT: I believe that-- does that hit your armor class?

TALIESIN: That does hit, yes.

LIAM: Wow.

MARISHA: A Stunning Strike.

MATT: Okay. Are you doing damage or are you just-- are you...?

MARISHA: Um, yeah.

MATT: All right, go ahead and roll damage for it.

LAURA: Why?

MARISHA: Because Beau.

MATT: Yeah, roll damage.

TALIESIN: I'm okay with this.

MARISHA: 10.

MATT: So you take 10 points of bludgeoning damage, Caduceus. I need you to roll a constitution saving throw.

MARISHA: Roll low, please.

LAURA: Come on.

TALIESIN: Constitution saving throw?

MATT: Yes.

TALIESIN: Okay, here's one die that had been sucking.

SAM: Legendary action.

TALIESIN: 20.

MARISHA: Fuck! Ah, pop, pop! Cracking it and I'm trying it again. Stay down, stay down.

MATT: Your turn around and say: Hi! (impacts) You're just getting pummeled in the water.

MARISHA: 20 to hit.

TALIESIN: Oh yeah, that hits.

MATT: All right, roll damage a second time.

MARISHA: Okay, eight damage and Stunning Strike. I will knock his ass unconscious.

MATT: Another constitution saving throw.

TALIESIN: 14?

MARISHA: Fail, fail. (cheering) You fail.

MATT: Yeah, your body suddenly--

TALIESIN: I've rolled in--

MATT: It tightens up. The muscles lock up and you're no longer swimming. You're veering a bit towards the torchbloom.

MARISHA: I'm going to loop, do the lifeguard vest hold, and start kicking backwards and paddling and dragging him out as quickly as I can.

MATT: Okay, dragging him will halve your movement.

MARISHA: Will halve my movement. Yeah, so move, action, Step of the Wind again.

MATT: Okay, you-- using your-- okay. To get up to him to this point because you're moving so fast, it took maybe about, with him going forward, I'd say 50 more feet. So you have, at your double movement, you have another 50 feet. To move backwards now at 25. And if using your bonus action Step of the Wind, so you can drag him back 50 feet.

MARISHA: Awesome, I'll drag him back 50 feet.

MATT: Okay, I need you to make a dexterity saving throw because you're now maneuvering you and him as fast as you can, backward through a tunnel that is surrounded in torchbloom.

MARISHA: Okay, that's fine. Okay, 19.

MATT: 19, okay. You manage to just barely maneuver past. There are moments where the orange glow gets very intense and you instinctually kick away and manage to avoid going shoulder first into a batch of very thick tangled torchbloom.

MARISHA: Does Caleb see me yet?

MATT: At this point, with you moving forward, you would be able to see her and Caduceus. You both are now meeting partway in the tunnel,

MARISHA: Help, it's again.

LIAM: I pull cat's mint out of-- out of a deep pocket and the cat's claw appears near them, because it's 120-foot range. And I will just try to grab Caduceus and pull them both through, like I'm working one of those things in an arcade where the claw goes down and grabs a stuffed animal and I will pull them through the tunnel.

MATT: Both of them?

LIAM: Well, they're connected right now.

MATT: They are yes, okay.

LIAM: I'll grab Caduceus' body.

MATT: Okay. How much-- how far can you move your cat hand in one round?

LIAM: There is so much text on this spell.

SAM: I think it's at least 60, if not 120.

LIAM: That sounds familiar. That's familiar. So I should see 60 somewhere in this wall of text. Yeah, 60 feet.

MATT: 60 feet, okay. Because it is a magical creation, it does not deal with the resistance of the water. Are you holding onto that or are you letting Caduceus go?

LAURA: (whispered) Let go.

MARISHA: I'll let go, yeah.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: I'll let go.

MATT: You let go of Caduceus.

MARISHA: But then I'm going to, like, start still swimming that direction, like playing goalie on the way back.

TRAVIS: Yeah, yeah, got it.

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

MATT: Got it, okay. So as you--

LIAM: It's like Operation.

MATT: Exactly. As the mystical cat's claw appears and it wraps its claws around Caduceus, Caduceus still reeling from the impact and you holding yourself there, blocking any further transition into the tunnel. You guys are a little bit further in. You've backtracked past the area where it's split. So now it's just a singular tunnel and ahead it would split if you were to continue going again. Using the cat's claw, you watch as Caduceus, eyes wide, around, suddenly goes (whooshing) and gets yanked backward out through the tunnel, while you guys are both standing there. From that distance, it's not quite to the entrance, but it's right at the cusp. You guys can barely see in the torchbloom ahead, you see this mystical, large, familiar, orange-colored cat claw begin to visually appear from the upward arc that the tunnel began to take. Caduceus. You are... You stunned him, pulled him back. It's not until your next turn. So you're stunned, so you can't do anything.

MARISHA: Yes, that's right!

MATT: Just until the end of your next turn.

MARISHA: Monks are the best.

TALIESIN: Darn it! Thank you. (laughter)

MATT: Okay, so that would now bring it back to Beauregard's turn.

MARISHA: Okay, I'm going to follow the cat paw.

MATT: Okay, so--

TRAVIS: (southern accent) The cat paw.

MARISHA: (southern accent) Cat paw.

MATT: After you've, Caleb, as you're there floating, Beauregard has been playing goalie just (whooshing) darts off and follows afterward. You very easily catch up to Caduceus, who's now starting to rouse and begin to fight against the claw.

MARISHA: And then--

MATT: There's not enough room for you to go past it.

MARISHA: Still backs up like he said. I don't entirely know even which sport that's referencing, but that's what I'm doing. And ... Patient Defense.

LIAM: Ja, just ring his bell if he starts acting up.

MARISHA: Should I just punch him again? Just for good measure?

LAURA: Nope.

TRAVIS: Nope.

LAURA: Just push him.

LIAM: It couldn't hurt.

MATT: What are you going to do?

MARISHA: I'll just wait.

LIAM: It could hurt.

MARISHA: Just going to wait. Just keep dragging him. Are you holding an action or are you?

MARISHA: I'm going to Patient Defense.

MATT: Okay, so you're--

LIAM: As we move away from you?

MARISHA: Wait, is that the right call?

MATT: It's up to you.

LAURA: Just keep moving forward.

MARISHA: Okay, I'll keep following. I'll keep following.

MATT: Right, well, you're right there against them. There's not enough room to go around. So you have to wait until--

MARISHA: Can I push them? Can I just, like, is that doable?

MATT: Right now? He's being held by an arcane force.

MARISHA: Oh, fuck it. Crack! I'm going to try to knock him again.

MATT: Okay, go for it. Go for it.

TRAVIS: When in doubt.

MATT: He is still stunned, so you have an advantage on the attacks.

LIAM: That's my partner.

MARISHA: There we go. 26.

TALIESIN: Yeah, that hits.

MATT: All right, go ahead and roll damage.

SAM: You're holding Caduceus while Beau is just pummeling him.

LIAM: I'm all for it.

MARISHA: I rolled shitty. Seven damage.

LIAM: Shouldn't have gone down that hole.

MATT: Are you Stunning Strike?

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: All right. So mark another ki point. Make another constitution saving throw.

TALIESIN: That would be five.

MARISHA: Failed. He's stunned again.

MATT: Crack!

TALIESIN: (groans)

MARISHA: Okay, that's my turn. I don't know, I just to wait for him to be dragged the fuck out of here.

MATT: Caleb.

LIAM: I'll keep looking over my shoulder to get out of the tunnel if I still can.

MATT: Yep, and so you start swimming to catch up with them. And you get a little closer.

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: Your Expeditious Retreat is gone because you're now concentrating on the--

LIAM: Yeah, of course.

MATT: So you're moving slowly--

LIAM: We're still in the tunnels at this point?

MATT: Yeah, you're still in the tunnel. Because you had to push the claw to move him basically ahead of you--

LIAM: Correct.

MATT: -- towards the exit. So you have lost for the most part sight of the exit, but you can just barely see where they are as it curves upward.

LIAM: Right, I would not let the claw get so far ahead of me that I can't obviously focus on it.

MATT: Right, but it's just at that point where they're about to vanish. So you can either continue to move the claw--

LIAM: No, I will-- no, I'll wait. I'll keep moving towards it and pause it-- the paws as I approach it.

TRAVIS: Pause the paws.

MATT: All right, so still stationary, unmoving, holding Caduceus, who is stunned. All of you-- the rest of you can just barely see the familiar sight of the cat's claw there and some movement and a little bit of air escape from some sort of strange--

TRAVIS: Just wait, just let it--

LAURA: Is he okay? Did you get him?

MARISHA: Yeah. I did. Yeah. I don't know if he's okay. To be totally honest, he's probably not.

TRAVIS: You hit him didn't you?

MARISHA: Yeah. A few times, but I had to.

TALIESIN: Are we out yet?

MARISHA: I didn't have to.

MATT: Not yet. Because the claw hasn't moved since the time before.

LAURA: We're shouting through the water.

MARISHA: Yeah, I hit him!

MATT: There you go. Although, if you're just using your action to move as well. Because it's bonus action to move the claw, right?

LIAM: No-- bonus-- oh, yes. Bonus action to use the claw, that's right.

MATT: You could actually swim 30 feet, if you use your action and your movement to go 15, 15 underneath.

LIAM: That's true. Then all I would be doing is moving the claw.

MATT: Right, so you would be able to move the claw just beyond--

LAURA: Yay!

MATT: -- the entrance, if you'd like to with your bonus.

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: You guys watch as it just pushes past the entranceway. The torchbloom themselves are about 10 feet from where Caduceus is now being held and you can see him limp, eyes lolling back in the head a little bit. A little bit of a blood cloud starting to appear at one side of the jaw. And there's Beauregard behind going--

MARISHA: Sorry.

LIAM: As I catch up the claw goes from this-- this position to this position and Caleb just starts doing this: raises Caduceus out. And the water dripping.

MATT: Okay, Beauregard?

MARISHA: I'll follow and come up to the surface, yeah.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: Is he still like--

MATT: He's stunned until the end of your turn.

LAURA: So get him far away. Get him as far away from the blooms as we can. And we can hold on to him.

MATT: All right so coming back to Caleb's next turn. You're no longer stunned, but it's not back to your turn yet.

TRAVIS: Nott, you be ready to shoot him.

SAM: I'm ready. (cocks crossbow)

TRAVIS: We'll kill him if we have to.

SAM: Explosive arrow.

MATT: You watch as the cat's claw-- every time. The cat's claw, much like a cat's claw machine, drags the soaking wet Caduceus out of the water and above the surface. And he's now dangling wet, dripping, and just shaking his head. You are in a lot of pain. Your head is pounding, but the compulsion to swim towards the tunnel has passed. (cheering)

MARISHA: Shit.

TRAVIS: Fuck.

SAM: That was crazy.

TALIESIN: That's really dangerous. You shouldn't go anywhere near that.

LAURA: Get him on to-- get him onto the deck of one of the ships.

LIAM: That's what I was waiting to do. Yeah, I'm going to get him onto the nearest deck of a boat.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: That we can gather.

TALIESIN: That was my bad, oh.

MATT: All righty.

ASHLEY: I mean, to be fair it happened to us, too.

LAURA: Yeah, yeah, yeah. We just weren't alone, and you know.

TALIESIN: Oh yeah, buddy system.

LIAM: Yes, buddy system.

SAM: Yes, buddy system.

TRAVIS: I think it's more than that. I kind of was with you and you blinded me twice.

TALIESIN: Oh, yeah.

TRAVIS: It was a bit overt.

TALIESIN: I mean... you know.

TRAVIS: "You know"?

SAM: (laughs) That's his--

TALIESIN: It seemed to be the thing to do at the time.

TRAVIS: I understand. Not at all.

MATT: The nearest ship that you find is a small fishing vessel called the Fiona and you just go ahead and drag Caduceus up onto it. You guys gather up onto it there.

TALIESIN: I think-- I-- well. Yeah, I'll-- I'll fix this. This is-- this is my fault.

LAURA: You want me to fix you, Caduceus?

TALIESIN: I mean, I feel-- well, I feel a little bad. I'm a little embarrassed, but--

LAURA: We should take a rest. We should take a rest.

TALIESIN: Oh my god, we should take a rest.

TALIESIN: I think a rest would be good.

LAURA: You know what we should do?

TALIESIN: Make-- make tea.

LAURA: You know what we should do?

TALIESIN: Put a kettle on.

LAURA: We should have a feast.

TRAVIS: Oh, what kind of feast?

LIAM: A fancy one?

LAURA: A fancy feast. A Heroes' Fancy Feast.

SAM: Cat food?

LAURA: No, just a-- you know, just a feast that's fancy.

SAM: Where are we going to get a feast that's fancy? We're in a bunch of old boats.

LAURA: I can make one.

SAM: You're not a cook.

LAURA: No, I can make a magical one. And I even prepared for this a long time ago. Because I have a jeweled chalice.

TRAVIS: Hey! And that will help us?

LAURA: Oh, it's going to help us do so many things. Let me tell you all about it. When I find the spell.

SAM: Wait, before you do this--

TALIESIN: I don't think we're going to go back in there anytime soon.

LAURA: We're not?

LIAM: Caleb huffs and heaves over to Beauregard because he's not an athlete and goes (breathing heavily) and gives a weak little punch to her arms. That's-- that's-- you do good work.

TALIESIN: Thank you.

MARISHA: Thank you-- what? Thank you-- what?

LAURA: Would you guys rather, we not go in again today and wait til tomorrow?

TALIESIN: I'm pretty tapped. And we could go to the Ruins maybe.

LIAM: Maybe we could just sit down for a little bit.

TRAVIS: Yeah, short rest, the minimum.

SAM: Is it day time?

TRAVIS: We have to-- and we can check on all these ships.

SAM: Oh yeah, we woke up and just walked in here. It's, like, 10 in the morning.

TRAVIS: We're going to check out these boats and then nope.

TALIESIN: Elevensies.

MARISHA: (laughs)

MATT: Still pre-noon.

SAM: So then should we wait on the feast until we know like, if we're going to do something else today?

TALIESIN: I feel like--

SAM: I'm not really hungry.

LAURA: It lasts 24 hours.

TRAVIS: If we know we're going in, we should do it.

LAURA: If we know what we're going to go in tomorrow morning, we should do it. I just don't want to let it get too late again. And then it's too late.

LIAM: What are we doing in the morning?

TALIESIN: I would say breakfast in the morning, maybe.

MARISHA: Well, remember every time we sleep here--

TRAVIS: That's the other part.

LAURA: This will give us advantage on all of our wisdom saving throws. You know, whatever that means.

TRAVIS: If we were going to try to go to the Ruins and gamble with another wake up.

MARISHA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Or we could kill him and then try.

MARISHA: We could also--

ASHLEY: I like that idea.

MARISHA: Because, you know, it's like, it's a mental thing, right? So if we have the feast right before we go to bed, maybe it'll help the next morning? Was it a wisdom saving throw all that we were making?

LAURA: Yeah, that's the thing.

LIAM: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

MARISHA: So let's do it right before we go to bed.

TALIESIN: I love supper. It's after dinner.

LIAM: (breathless) How about a rest with a snack, and then we tour the boats.

SAM: You guys rest, I'm going to go start touring some boats.

TALIESIN: You've never hit me before.

TRAVIS: Are you all right, Caleb?

LIAM: Oh, you know.

TALIESIN: That's amazing. You're really good at that.

LIAM: Swimming's not my strong suit.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

LAURA: You were really brave, Caleb.

TRAVIS: You did very well.

LIAM: Well, we need the tall guy.

LAURA: Yes, we do. He's really good at healing.

TRAVIS: Is there a particular boat that we should all sit on and check out?

SAM: We're on The Fiona. Maybe we can at least check this one out while we're sitting here, right?

MARISHA: What's the biggest, fanciest looking boat? You mentioned it.

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: The biggest boat that you came across is massive. It's much larger than the Balleater was. It looked like what you could see from just the glances. You were swimming by when you first were inspecting. You can see the tips of a couple of ballistae that were set up on the deck. Or not on the deck, but like, like inside the gun deck with the-- some of them were open. Which leads you to believe it might've been been here pre-cannon technology.

LIAM: I was going to ask if it looks the same as the boats of the day or how old it seems.

MATT: I mean, boat technology doesn't advance dramatically, but.

LIAM: But decoration, flags, symbols.

MATT: It seems at least it was built in the last maybe hundred years or so is the best you can gather. You're not a master of ship--

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: -- architecture, necessarily. You, if you want to make a history check might be able to have a better view on that.

TRAVIS: Yeah, history. Rolled for that before in this campaign. 13.

MATT: 13, okay. Looking at how well the ship has been kept in here, like the quality and shape it it's in, the construct of it. You gather it probably once belonged to somebody like a major, major shipping company out of Port Damali. And it was converted with defenses because it was carrying probably a lot of really, really nice goods.

TRAVIS: Ooh.

MATT: But based on the fact that it's using older ballista, it's probably somewhere in the neighborhood of 60 to a 100 years old.

TRAVIS: Probably in the neighborhood of 60 to a 100 years old and heavily armed, probably.

LIAM: I'll tell you what, I don't know how we get it out of here yet, but I'd like to see you the captain of that ship.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MATT: You do see the name of it, too. It's called Eden's Horizon.

TRAVIS: Eden's Horizon.

LAURA: Does that mean anything to you, Fjord?

TRAVIS: Does that mean anything to me?

MATT: Not specifically.

TRAVIS: Not specifically. (laughter)

LAURA: 60 to 70 years old you said, Fjord?

TRAVIS: Roughly.

LAURA: Wow. That means Vo's been here that long?

TRAVIS: It seems so.

MATT: At least it was built during that time.

TRAVIS: A properly kept ship could be on the water for quite a while.

LAURA: That's true.

TRAVIS: Maintained.

LAURA: Do you think there's still really fancy things on there? Let's go find out.

TRAVIS: Yeah, yeah. Should we finish this short rest here on Fiona?

LAURA: Okay, okay, okay, okay.

MATT: Okay, so you complete your short rest. Easy enough, so you guys go and take that. Spend your hit dice to heal up, if you'd like, and get spells back or anything that has a short rest recovery period.

SAM: Doing a short rest?

MATT: Yes.

TALIESIN: Fuck, I'm killing it. Miss my-- I miss my-- my-- little pendant.

LIAM: I've done a bit.

TALIESIN: Three.

TRAVIS: Caduceus, while we're resting, there's no, like, communicating with the Wild Mother to see if anyone is still on our tail from previous chases, is there?

TALIESIN: Not today.

TRAVIS: Okay.

TALIESIN: I mean, other than-- I mean, sometimes you can just get lucky, but--

TRAVIS: We're just in such a unique pickle, I would hate for, you know, scouts of Uk'otoa to show up here. MARISHA and

LAURA: (whispering) Uk'otoa.

TRAVIS: Jesus.

TALIESIN: I'm a-- I'm a big believer in just dealing with what's in front of you until it's not there any more and then, when you've got breathing room look beyond the horizon.

TRAVIS: I normally would agree with you, but the last time I did that, I got stabbed in the chest in the middle of my REM sleep.

TALIESIN: That's fair. That's never happened to me before. Yeah, that definitely-- that'd leave a mark.

TRAVIS: Yeah, it did. Okay.

TALIESIN: I suppose-- I haven't used my Hail Mary percentile roll today.

MATT: You have not.

TRAVIS: You don't-- you don't--

TALIESIN: No, I'm thinking of-- if there's a big ask that would be amusing.

LAURA: Have her send somebody along to help us defeat...

TRAVIS: Guacamole.

TALIESIN: That feels like a different kind of ask than you normally get out of something like this.

LAURA: Oh, really? I don't know how it works.

TALIESIN: I would love to know who we face, and what he is, and where he comes from.

TRAVIS: Mmm, good. Roll high, low.

TALIESIN: Low.

LAURA: Roll low. (gasps)

MARISHA: Wait, what.

LAURA: Did you succeed?

TALIESIN: Let me-- I got to look it up.

LAURA: If you rolled below your level.

MATT: Below your level.

TALIESIN: I rolled a five.

MARISHA: (screaming)

TRAVIS: You did? You really did?

SAM: Is this Divine Intervention?

ASHLEY: No way, this is going to work.

TALIESIN: I've been rolling so low and finally it's paid off. (laughter) Yep, yep, that's the zero zero five. Yep yep, that's-- I'm so sorry, Matt.

MATT: No, no, no, no.

TALIESIN: Holy shit.

MATT: Okay, okay.

TRAVIS: Zero zero is zero, right? It's not a hundred?

TALIESIN: I had to double check because I was like eight, nine, oh yeah.

LAURA: Oh my god.

MATT: Okay, so while you all are resting and snacking and hearing the heavy dripping sound of water and streams breaking through from the pools above, at the base of the volcanic mountain. You sit here and quietly concentrate. Close your eyes, finding that space of peace, that point of connection with nature and with the Wild Mother herself. You hear the droplets (water droplets plopping) around and then with each impact, there's an echo and the echo gets louder. (droplets echoing) As the echoes begin to swirl, it becomes this low hum. This strange rhythmic beat. And as the beat comes through, you can feel your consciousness lifting. And it's not you expanding, but it's her. It's the Wild Mother. You can feel her arms taking you by the head and lifting you into a dark space. In this dark space, as the echoes are surrounding you, the loud swirling noise of water droplets hitting surfaces and rocks crumbling. You suddenly see a silver gossamer sky. Swirls of strange clouds and sparkles a familiar space. You've been here before. Briefly. You stepped into a creature's mouth in a space like this. And here you see, you sense something. You sense fear. You sense something fleeing. Something desperately trying to escape. You sense whatever this Vokodo was and is, but was, running. Running from something. And as it crashes through the silver, it crashes through the boundaries. It crashes into this island. And the impact of it crashing drags shards of other places with it. And you see as it lands at the base of this volcano, the volcano changes it. And it changes the island that houses this volcano. You don't fully understand what this is, but you know it's not from here. It has origins somewhere in the Astral Sea. And it came here to hide.

TALIESIN: From something in the Astral Sea?

SAM: (whispering) Astral Sea.

MATT: And with that, you feel that sense of something looking upon you once more. That familiar glaring, present intrusive sense of Vokodo sensing you nearby and the Wild Mother sets you back as to where you once were sitting, knowing that to peer any further into places you shouldn't be looking would be unwise.

TRAVIS: (laughs in awe)

MATT: And with that, she releases you. The droplets, the echoes subside. And once again, you're left there sitting on the deck of the ship hearing: (water droplets plopping) As you take a deep breath and open your eyes once more amongst your friends, chewing on their rations, bandaging their wounds and preparing for whatever the next step of your journey may be.

LAURA: You okay, Caduceus? You look like you're having a day dream.

TALIESIN: I, uh I know where he came from.

LAURA: Who?

TALIESIN: Vokodo.

LAURA: What?

ASHLEY: How do you know that?

TALIESIN: I had a vision.

LAURA: You had a vision?

TALIESIN: Very, very nice cave.

LAURA: That's so fucking cool.

TRAVIS: Do you know where he came from?

SAM: Where?

TALIESIN: He escaped from the Astral Sea. Being chased by something, something he fears. He's hiding from it. His escape, shattered reality on this island. He's the reason why it's broken and the volcano did something to him. He's been changed by it. He's afraid.

LAURA: Wow.

TALIESIN: But not of us.

TRAVIS: You said he's hiding.

TALIESIN: Yes.

TRAVIS: Was he being chased?

TALIESIN: At one point, or at the very least he was running.

LAURA: The Astral Sea.

SAM: Vilya-- is Vilya with us?

MATT: Vilya is with you and is currently listening to this.

SAM: Is the Astral Sea where you were hunting this kraken or is that a different place?

MATT: "No, no."

LAURA: The Astral Sea, that's where we were in the Happy Fun Ball wasn't it?

TALIESIN: I believe there was a moment of that, yes.

MARISHA: Beau-- would Beau know?

MATT: Yes, you and Caleb both were conscious of the plane that you were stepping through, where you can upon the astral dreadnought. The large chained creature in the Folding Halls of Halas that you had stepped into its maw.

LAURA: Like you do.

MATT: Like you do.

TRAVIS: No problem.

SAM: So if he came from the Astral Sea, does that mean that like this spout of seawater that's coming in, there's another rift somewhere on this island that leads there, maybe?

TALIESIN: Could be.

TRAVIS: Sounds like a few other rifts.

LAURA: Yikes.

TALIESIN: I think he broke the island.

MARISHA: He broke through a barrier.

TRAVIS: And if he's hiding does that mean that something bigger or worse is coming?

LAURA: Or is looking for him? Like maybe we could find whatever's looking for him and let them know where he is.

TRAVIS: He's been here for almost 25 years, at least. Because of Vilya.

MATT: Best that you can tell based on the information, if it's reliable, because it's hard to rely on the memories of those who live here. There've been many generations that have lived their time on the island. If that's true, he's been here for possibly a couple of hundred years.

TRAVIS: Hiding very successfully.

MATT: But at the very least, he's been here for 25 to 30 based on what Vilya was saying.

LIAM: Maybe we could send him back.

LAURA: That'd be cool. Let's just use-- I have Banishment. I mean, I think it would probably work.

TRAVIS: Can you pick where he goes?

LIAM: Yeah, as do I.

TALIESIN: You send them back.

LIAM: As do you.

TRAVIS: Can you choose to send him to a specific place?

MATT: Banishment sends them to their home plane.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Wherever that may be.

SAM: For a minute.

MATT: For a minute. And if they're in their home plane, it shunts them to... I don't know if it's something you choose or if it's just at random.

LAURA: Once they go to their home plane they can't come back, or--?

LIAM: If the spell lasts its duration and doesn't get interrupted. They're there, they stay there.

TALIESIN: Yeah, you can lock them. If you know their home plane, you can lock them there.

LIAM: So you, and you and I could--

TALIESIN: Especially if we--

LIAM: -- take turns trying to--

TALIESIN: I can also maybe weaken him.

LAURA: We'd have to weaken his wisdom. Is that what it is? I think it's wisdom.

TALIESIN: I can do that. Maybe. I bet he's hard to banish.

LAURA: Yeah-- his charisma. Ooh, I bet his charisma's pretty high.

SAM: You might not even need to do that, though. If you just threatened him with that, it might be enough to make a bargain or something? No?

TRAVIS: I don't know.

TALIESIN: I think a bargain is possible.

TRAVIS: Someone threatens us, we normally, you know (click click).

SAM: Oh, we're real stupid, though.

TRAVIS: That's true.

TALIESIN: Maybe we can offer him something he really wants? Maybe he's collecting all these things just in case.

SAM: Maybe we could act. We could pretend to be the thing that's hunting him.

LAURA: What if I sent him a message?

SAM: We were like, "We found you, "we came from the Astral Sea!"

TRAVIS: "We're a bunch of kobolds in a jacket!"

SAM: "We're here to get you!"

MARISHA: We're going to serve him papers.

LAURA: I could send him a message. Did you get the image of what it was that was hunting him?

TALIESIN: Did I get an image of what was hunting him? I don't think I did.

MATT: You didn't.

TALIESIN: I did not.

LIAM: We are also not entirely sure he's not watching this conversation right now.

LAURA: Well.

SAM: Well, we've been calling him Guacamole, so he doesn't know we're talking about him at all.

TALIESIN: It's possible we can-- knowing that.

TRAVIS: And he has your thing--

TALIESIN: We may be able to offer him something he really wants.

TRAVIS: -- that allows you to remain hidden right?

LAURA: Like what?

TALIESIN: Safety.

LIAM: Correct.

TALIESIN: That's why he's here.

LIAM: Although he had quite a lot of bling attached to him, so he might not be able to use everything on him.

TRAVIS: Right.

TALIESIN: Actually, hm. Huh. I have an idea, just in case I don't want to say it out loud, but maybe. Maybe we have exactly the thing he wants.

TRAVIS: Which is...?

MARISHA: Do we need to do charades?

SAM: We probably should.

ASHLEY: Sounds like--

MARISHA: Three.

SAM: The happy?

LAURA: Oh!

SAM: We don't have it.

TALIESIN: We can get it.

SAM: Oh, not today.

TALIESIN: No, but deals can be made. If you really want to hide, there's nowhere better to hide.

ASHLEY: Wait, who has that?

SAM: We gave it to Yoda, Yuzo.

LAURA: Yussa.

SAM: Yussa.

LAURA: I don't think he's going to give it back to us, though.

SAM: Yuzu.

MARISHA: Definitely not going to give it back to give it to an astral deity.

LAURA: Is he, like, a god, is he actually a god then? Is he from, like, a long, long, long time ago? Wasn't there, like, a Calamity or something?

TALIESIN: I think there's less of a god and more of a goon.

MARISHA: What would I know about the Astral Plane? Would I know a decent amount?

MATT: Make an arcana check.

MARISHA and TALIESIN: Arcana check?

TRAVIS: No, you're just very excited.

TALIESIN: Not give it to him, but let him hide inside of it.

MARISHA: 16.

MATT: 16.

TRAVIS: Do you want to?

MATT: From what you know of the Astral Sea. It is one of those boundary planes that sits between many of the other realms. It is an amorphous realm where the will and the imagination has influence over the space around you. That's how you're able to will yourselves to fly and float in the time that you spent there. Some creatures that live there and have been there for an extended period of time or their species has been there for a long time, have learned to actually shape the amorphous matter and energy of it of it into actual structures and objects. If this creature, if it hails from there probably is a very psychic-oriented creature, and based on what Caduceus said, explains why whatever it did to try and break through to escape, also took these shards of other places and jammed it here, was a very singular, dangerous, little burst. And that's as much as you can really gather out of it. Based on how it looks, it definitely fits the somewhat, you know, tentacled, floaty type cosmic creature that you would assume some, some things there might look like, but that's as best as you can ascertain with that roll.

TALIESIN: A little bit of the Beetlejuice.

TRAVIS: So we have two options, we--

TALIESIN: We should be looking at boats while we talk about this.

TRAVIS: Yeah. We face him or we check out the Ruins first.

TALIESIN: If we can find something of the Astral Sea that might be helpful.

SAM: What do you think we'll find at the Ruins? I mean, given what we know about the island and given what we've seen here, possibly a rift to another place, right? Other than that, what do you really expect that we can have that we can use?

LIAM: Well, the Ruins were described to us as very other worldly and unlike this place. So it could possibly lead us to answers for what this thing is running from, its real story. And we also know that he didn't want us to find this place, which has shown us very probably a backdoor to his home. And a new boat for you.

TRAVIS: For us, for us.

LIAM: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Let's take a look at this thing.

SAM: Were the Ruins off-limits as well?

LIAM: That is correct.

SAM: Were they off-limits or were they just dangerous?

LAURA: No, they were off-limits.

LIAM: Vokodo didn't--

LAURA: Right, Vilya?

MATT: "Yes, pretty much everyone within Vo was told not to go to the Ruins, that it was too dangerous, and we were being protected by Vokodo from what ever resided there."

TRAVIS: Well, that's bullshit.

LAURA: There were T-rexes, I mean.

LIAM: This creature is manipulating all the people of Vo So he is using them. He's lying to them and he doesn't want them to go there. Which means we want to go there.

TRAVIS: It could be an item, a weapon, something we could use.

LAURA: Maybe one of these shards that broke through.

TALIESIN: Whatever's pissed off about him.

LIAM: Correct.

TALIESIN: A magic mirror to talk to, like, pissed off people in the Astral Sea.

TRAVIS: Is that something that you have seen previously?

TALIESIN: I mean, we were in that very, like, I had a vision with a lot of glass. There was a lot going on. I don't know.

SAM: You've had a day.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

LAURA: Think about it, if you had been taken and eaten by him, we would have never known all these things.

TALIESIN: That would have been unfortunate, yeah.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

MARISHA: Vilya. Does anyone tell you what these buildings, what these Ruins look like? At Heaven's Gate?

MATT: "From the--"

MARISHA: Heaven's break? No, wait.

MATT: Heaven's Gate is a whole different thing.

TRAVIS: The Nikes!

MARISHA: Different cult.

MATT: Heaven Falls is where you are right now. The Ruins is what I think you're discussing.

MARISHA: Yes, the Ruins.

MATT: She says, "I've only gotten close enough to look overhead. "And I mean, some of them look, "I mean, at least terrestrial, "though old, but nothing I recognize. "Definitely ominous."

MARISHA: Terrestrial.

LAURA: Ooh.

LIAM: Well.

MARISHA: I wonder if that's where he crashed.

LIAM: Here's what we have to weigh. We want to nip this in the bud because, obviously, the clock is ticking on us being able to remember who we are. Right, but we also don't know what we are marching into. We just went to great trouble to bring you back so that we didn't go in unprepared. We could be more prepared.

TRAVIS: True.

LIAM: I say we go to the Ruins. After spending some time here.

SAM: We're going to look around the boats, right?

TRAVIS: Yeah, let's search The Fiona, and then we'll make our way--

LAURA: The Fiona's a fishing boat, but yeah, let's search the fancy one. We're going to search the fancy one.

SAM: We're on The Fiona. Let's just go look downstairs for 10 minutes.

TRAVIS: Don't judge a book by its cover.

MATT: So as you guys finish your short rest.

TALIESIN: Yeah, sure.

MATT: I would like you all--

LAURA: Oh no.

MARISHA: (sings circus music)

LAURA: We should have had a feast.

MATT: -- to make an investigation check.

LIAM: To reach under your chair.

ASHLEY: Okay, okay.

TRAVIS: So worried about it.

LAURA: Can we Guide ourselves to do better?

MATT: No, because you are not aware of this happening.

LAURA: Oh no.

MARISHA: Is it one of those things?

SAM: Is this for investigating The Fiona?

LAURA: This is for investigating--

MATT: This is just everyone make an investigation check.

MARISHA: This is because the gnomes.

TRAVIS: 25. Natural 19.

MARISHA: The garden gnomes--

LIAM: 27.

MARISHA: -- have stolen our stuff again.

TRAVIS: Shit.

SAM: 30.

LIAM: Ooh!

MATT: Got some minds in here.

LAURA: 15.

MATT: All right.

TALIESIN: 13, which is good for me.

ASHLEY: 21.

MARISHA: 24.

MATT: Jesus!

SAM: These are sick!

LIAM: We found everything, we found everything.

MATT: Yeah, that's great.

TRAVIS: On the fishing boat.

MATT: Caduceus, pick an item on your equipment list.

LAURA: It's all going missing still.

MATT: And it's gone.

TALIESIN: Yep.

MATT: I mean, keep tabs on it. You had it, but it's gone.

TALIESIN: But I haven't noticed anything's gone. Well, I haven't looked for any-- Well, actually, I would've looked for my hat, at this point.

MARISHA: (laughs)

MATT: Yeah, your hat. Where'd your hat go? That's weird.

LAURA: How does he keep taking our stuff?

TRAVIS: Ricochet.

SAM: I haven't missed anything. Well, I have missed anything. I haven't been looking for it.

TRAVIS: Who's talking right now?

LIAM: Could be unrelated. Maybe.

MARISHA: How is he taking our stuff?

LAURA: How's he doing our stuff?

SAM: What'd you lose there, Caducey?

ASHLEY: That's the thing that's weird.

TALIESIN: My wok.

ASHLEY: But you don't know?

TALIESIN: My cooking--

LIAM: He's from the Astral Plane.

MARISHA: Yeah, he can probably just reach through and be like, "Mine now."

LIAM: He sees it, he thinks it, it's gone.

MARISHA: And then thinks it and wants it, yeah. Absolutely.

LAURA: Keep an eye on your bracers, Beau.

MARISHA: I am going to watch them.

LIAM: But you don't have any bracers.

MARISHA: No, they're right--

LIAM: No, I know you do, but you don't have them.

MARISHA: No, I don't. I do not love these. I do not have bracers.

LIAM: They're really shitty.

TRAVIS: What's on the boat?

MATT: Who wants to check through The Fiona?

SAM: Fjord, you should go check, you know boats.

TRAVIS: Yes, I do.

SAM: I'll go with you because I'm (click, click) good at this.

MATT: You could either both make individual investigation checks, or one of you can make it with advantage.

SAM: I don't need him. (laughter)

MATT: Holy shit, okay.

SAM: I'm good on my own. You can do your own, I'll do my own.

TRAVIS: You don't want to do it twice?

SAM: Nah, you do you.

TRAVIS: Okay. If I roll higher than you this will be-- ooh. It's not going to be higher, 19.

SAM: 26.

TRAVIS: Yep.

MATT: You guys take a moment. It's not an extensive ship. So, I'd say, about 20 or so minutes, you do a pretty thorough pass of the immediate visible regions of the ship. It's picked clean. Like anything of worth is gone.

TRAVIS: Sure.

MATT: You see there's some basic equipment. There's some nets. You can see maybe some building supplies, but it's all very basic, very... very... things that aren't worth anything.

TRAVIS: Fishing nets or hempen rope nets?

MATT: Fishing nets.

TRAVIS: Okay.

LAURA: All of us are missing something?

MATT: No.

LIAM: No, just the people who failed that roll.

LAURA: Understood.

LIAM: I'd like to make my way over to the Eden's Horizon. And yeah, look for stuff, but I want to see how sound, see if there's damage on the inside--

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: -- of the hull, all that.

ASHLEY: Yeah, I'll help, too.

TRAVIS: Yeah, we'll all go over. Let's be honest, the ship's dope.

MATT: So make an investigation check, with Yasha's help you can take it with advantage or you can roll individually, Yasha, up to you.

ASHLEY: Go for it.

LIAM: That is a 28.

MATT: Nice. Looking over it, the ship is in very good shape. There's some very minor damage. It looks like mostly scuffs on the sides of the hull that you envision probably occurred when it was wedging its way into this cavern originally. The ship is wide enough where it would just barely fit, but it looks like there had been some elements of the the perimeter rock through the illusion where it scraped along the hull, but it's fairly superficial. It could probably use some fixing. The rest of the ship, aside from the ballista weapons, which are these long iron rods with points at the end that can be loaded in, anything of worth is picked clean.

LIAM: Except for the boat. This is our ticket out of here.

LAURA: Well, maybe.

SAM: Are there sails? Haven't they been rotted away?

MATT: The sails are still there. They're kept up. The sails--

LAURA: Wouldn't this boat be really slow? I feel like-- shouldn't we look for a fast ship?

TRAVIS: It depends on what we want the mission to be. Speed, or defense and attack.

TALIESIN: I feel like we can make that decision at a future point.

TRAVIS: Can I make my way up to the highest point? And so that I can see the rest of the ships? From my time in Port Damali, do I recognize any of the ships? Any names that I recognize?

MATT: Um, I mean, you see a number of ships. There's-- just getting the names nearby, you see there's one called The Mistral that's a decent sailing ship. You see one called the Sea Banshee. That's more of a longship that looks to be not from around the Menagerie Coast, at the very least. There's one called the Drunken Mariner. That's another fishing vessel. There's a Kingfisher, which looks to be another sailing ship. This one looks to be, maybe it does have some elements of it that looked like it's seen some war time or at least seen some battles. It has some visible damage, and you could see the where the repairs were done, not for aesthetic reasons, but for sheer purpose. None of them catch your attention as anything you've seen in Port Damali.

TRAVIS: No Tide's Breath, right?

MATT: No, no Tide's Breath. But the Eden's Horizon is definitely the largest ship. It would be the equivalent of between a galley and a sailing ship. So with the size of the sails there, it would travel at pace with probably the Balleater, if not slightly slower. But it is larger, it can carry more and has the opportunity, if upgraded, to have more firepower.

LAURA: Oh!

SAM: I like it.

LAURA: Yeah, that sounds cool.

TRAVIS: I really feel like we're not going to outrun a dragon turtle.

TALIESIN: And we're probably going to have a lot of people who want to leave, if everything goes to plan. It's a big crew.

MARISHA: Yeah.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

TRAVIS: I'm sure they'd get more than just one ship up and running at that point.

TALIESIN: Sure.

TRAVIS: But yeah.

MARISHA: Plus, you could totally rename it to the Eden's Ball-rizon. And it's, like, a spiritual successor. Or the--

LAURA: Yeah, I don't know, it doesn't have the same ring to it.

MARISHA: I don't know. I used the first thing that came to my head. We could totally workshop it, yeah.

LAURA: I'll think about it.

MARISHA: Dope.

MATT: All righty.

MARISHA: Hmm. It's a tough one.

SAM: You got some more ball names over there?

MARISHA: I'm working on it.

TRAVIS: You know, I did give the ball up. It's actually with Caleb.

LAURA: I know. And honestly, Fjord, he's not with Uk'otoa anymore.

SAM: (whispering) Uk'otoa.

TALIESIN: (whispering) Uk'otoa.

LAURA: So it doesn't have the same ring to it, you know.

SAM: I've got an idea for the name, actually, if we do commandeer this ship. I just-- DM, the name of the ship, it's not just crudely painted on, I assume it's, like, in letters that are nailed to the side or something?

MATT: Oh, on this, it's actually loosely scrolled in. It's been carved into a large piece of wood that has been applied to the area.

SAM: If we took that wood and chopped it up a bit, rearranged some of the letters.

TRAVIS: No.

SAM: No, no, it's so good. It would spell Nein Heroez. MARISHA and

LAURA: Oh!

SAM: With a Z at the end.

MARISHA: Oh!

MATT: Like an Xbox gamer tag.

MARISHA: That's my favorite tag.

TALIESIN: Wow.

TRAVIS: Like N-I-N-E or N-E-I-N?

SAM: It's up to us.

LAURA: Aww, that's wonderful.

TRAVIS: All right.

TALIESIN: I am both impressed and a little embarrassed.

LIAM: We could put a little Mountain Dew logo.

SAM: And for you, Jester.

LAURA: Yeah?

SAM: There's an extra D at the end that you can do whatever you want with.

LAURA: That's wonderful!

MARISHA: Nein Heroezd.

TRAVIS: Did you do that in your head?

SAM: No, I've been working on that for a while. (laughter)

LAURA: That's lovely. Now I really want this ship.

TRAVIS: All right. So I guess our last thing to decide is Ruins and-- Ruins, right? Worth the night? Heroes' Feast beforehand and then Ruins?

LAURA: Definitely.

SAM: Can we transport there? Do you guys have, you magickies? Can you get us there? Can you turn into a fly-y thing again?

LAURA: Oh yeah, we can fly again today.

MATT: "After that rest we've taken, I can go ahead and continue to take that form at least twice more before I have to rest again."

TALIESIN: Perfect.

SAM: Three, four hours of flying? How long?

TRAVIS: Someone else can obviously fly with Vilya. It's quite exhilarating. I don't want to hog the experience.

SAM: That's all yours.

TRAVIS: No, I mean, you know.

SAM: It looked like you had a hoot up there.

ASHLEY: Yeah, it looked like you were having fun.

TRAVIS: Yeah, yes.

LIAM: How do we get out of here without being catapulted into the heavens?

LAURA: Oh, well, I could open up-- I could Control Water again.

LIAM: Ja, that opened the doorway, but we still lost a couple of our fighting women to the sky.

SAM: Ooh, ooh, ooh. What if we just embrace it?

LAURA: (gasps) Shoot us up-- Polymorph as we go. SIRI ON SAM'S WATCH: I didn't get that.

LIAM: Have you-- (laughter)

LIAM: Even Siri knows that's a bad idea.

MARISHA: That's a bad idea-- yeah.

LAURA: I love it. Let's do it.

TRAVIS: Well, isn't water dripping from above? Like, couldn't we--

SAM: But those are little holes. We saw those, right?

ASHLEY: Yeah, yeah, but I don't know if they're big enough for us to go through.

TRAVIS: But if it's volcanic and it's, like, a porus rock, could we try and make them bigger?

TALIESIN: That's a-- that seems-- I mean, like, those holes are tiny, right?

TRAVIS: Volcanic rock can be pretty brittle.

SAM: Blow up the roof?

TRAVIS: Yeah.

TALIESIN: I feel like--

SAM: Then it will, like, hit on the Nein HeroeZ?

TALIESIN: Let's-- let's not mess up the camp, though.

LAURA: Launching pad, launching pad!

TRAVIS: A fire hydrant.

MATT: Vilya answers your questions. "I can maintain my forms for about six or so hours."

TRAVIS: Straight?

SAM: But I mean, is that how long it will take to fly there?

MATT: "No, for flying from here to the Ruin."

TRAVIS: Oh, here.

TALIESIN: Map.

MATT: Which you have over there.

LAURA: Right there.

TRAVIS: Thanks. Watch out, cookie.

SAM: Oh no.

MATT: You know, it's fine. (laughter) I have it in my notes here somewhere.

SAM: Oh, watch your face, watch your eyes.

TRAVIS: Is the X where the--

LIAM: Yeah, but you love me.

TRAVIS: Where the Ruins are?

MATT: The X up top is where the Ruins are, and that little path there.

TRAVIS: Oh, wait, yeah. So we're going here and we're over here.

MARISHA: Okay, so like--

MATT: So that would go--

MARISHA: -- a quarter way?

TRAVIS: It's from here to here.

SAM: Four inches?

TRAVIS: Three and a half.

MATT: Flight--

LIAM: (wheezing laughter)

MATT: -- of flight, it would be about-- LIAM and

LAURA: (wheezing laughter)

LIAM: Sorry.

MATT: It's all right. I'll say a little over three hours.

MARISHA: Okay.

TRAVIS: Looks like a little over three hours.

LAURA: Oh gosh.

TRAVIS: I'm Professor X.

LAURA: Well, here's the thing. If I control the water to get out of here, I can't do three hours worth of Polymorph and do a Heroes' Feast.

SAM: That's why we have to use the water--

LAURA: We have to use it to go or else I won't be able to do it. I can only do three Polymorphs.

TALIESIN: I've got a terrible idea. Oh, you want to hear it? Okay. If you turn into a big bird, a big bird. And one at a time, catch us as we come up and then place us back down on the top of the fountain and then wait for the next one and catch us. I mean, that's only a little crazy. And then if-- and if-- who has Feather Fall?

SAM: I do.

TALIESIN: Oh, so-- and if she misses you can (snaps).

LAURA: Yeah, so you're the first one out.

TALIESIN: You're the net.

MARISHA: So just for clarification, we're talking about riding the spigot up to the upper level and then just walking around? Is that what you were talking about?

TALIESIN: Well, we can fly from there.

LAURA: I think what we should do is we should do the Polymorphs now, snatch up everybody that's riding, run full force-- fly full force to the waterfall. That way we launch kind of through it and up. That way we don't risk--

SAM: In bird form we're shooting up into the sky. We'd look so epic.

LAURA: Oh my gosh, that would be so much fun.

TRAVIS: Don't you think the flying creatures will separate from the ones they're carrying?

SAM: Probably not.

LAURA: No, I'll hold on really tight, you guys.

TRAVIS: Probably not. You're right.

MARISHA: I'm just confused as to why we need to do that.

MATT: Vilya looks noticeably, extremely nervous.

MARISHA: Can't we just take a normal takeoff?

LAURA: Fluffernutter!

SAM: Just think about it in slow motion, like (explosion sound effect)

MARISHA: I mean, I'm here for it. I just want to know the reason.

MATT: "I don't mean to interject into your group conversation--"

TRAVIS: You really should.

MATT: "I've spent quite a bit of time in various bird and avian forms."

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: "Water and flight with feathers that could absorb liquid tend to not go together as well."

LAURA: Well, but...

MATT: "If you want to elevate-- if you're limited on your capabilities of maintaining your form, we could hike around the mountain a bit to the north until we can get within a two hour flight distance and take us directly to the Ruin, or we could fly from here, land, and then hike the rest of the way towards the Ruin. You have to choose... Are you ready to spend everything you have to get there? Or if you're trying to conserve, do we want to brave--"

LAURA: Not to conserve. I just want to be able to do Heroes' Feast.

MATT: "Well, then we want to brave a bit of the mountain or brave a bit of the approach to the Ruin?"

ASHLEY: Well.

SAM: Or we can all just jump out through the thing at the same time.

MARISHA: It is really fun.

SAM: And I could cast Feather Fall on--

MARISHA: It is-- it's like Raging Waters. It's great fun.

MATT: "Look, if you're looking for fun in this, I'm not going to stop you from that. I just think combining it with the use of a flight-based feathered creature would be not optimal."

ASHLEY: Yeah, maybe we wait to do the flying after we've already gone out and up.

TALIESIN: Dried off a bit.

MARISHA: So out and up--

ASHLEY: It's very cool, but just in case.

MARISHA: Wait, what did you just say?

TRAVIS: I agree.

ASHLEY: Maybe not waiting to fly--

MARISHA: Right, until after we shoot up--

ASHLEY: And then you all can get a ride.

TRAVIS: Are we all holding hands and going into the geyser? Is that what we're doing?

LAURA: Oh, geez Louise.

ASHLEY: We can try to see if we can--

LIAM: Is the idea to link hands and get thrown willy nilly into the sky and then have some of turn into birds, while I am cartwheeling into the heavens?

TRAVIS: I don't know.

ASHLEY: Yeah. (laughter)

SAM: Caleb, you taught me Feather Fall. We could all join hands. We all spring up together. You and me cast Feather Fall--

LIAM: I don't have that prepared today--

SAM: Yeah, you do! We'll be fine. (laughter) I believe in you!

LAURA: Here's the other thing, though. I mean, I'm not brilliant with mathematics or physics or stuff, but I feel like if we're on the inside and it shoots us up, we're not going to make it through the waterfall. So it's just going to shoot us up and we're going to catch the edge of the ceiling.

TRAVIS: Or out.

MARISHA: Well, I thought we had to go out, right? And then up?

ASHLEY: What could possibly go wrong?

LIAM: The idea that you--

ASHLEY: I think that's the way we need to go for sure.

LIAM: I am pretty good with math and the idea that you think you can predict the direction you are going to be thrown into the sky by jumping into a geyser is ludicrous. (laughter)

ASHLEY: But the thing is if we all hold hands. And then we can have, like, a contest, like whoever lets go loses.

LIAM: Oh, she convinced me. She convinced me. I changed my mind.

TRAVIS: (high-pitched laughter)

MARISHA: It's high stakes Red Rover.

LAURA: Okay, okay, forget it. We can hike for an hour if it means saving all of our lives.

TRAVIS: The important stuff.

LIAM: Just imagine. Just imagine Matt killing all of us goldfish. We're all goldfish.

TALIESIN: We're all going to go goldfish?

MARISHA: We're basically gods at this point.

MATT: I--

MARISHA: No. What's the worst that could happen?

MATT: -- am down for whatever you want to do. (laughter)

LAURA: I'm going to jump into the water and start swimming towards the geyser.

MATT: So Jester dives in and is heading toward the geyser. Do you guys follow suit?

LIAM: Nope.

MARISHA: Sure! Yeah.

LAURA: I've got 10 minutes of this stupid spell. You guys better get over here.

SAM: Yeah, yeah, we're coming, we're coming.

MARISHA: Wait, what spell?

LAURA: I cast Control Water on the geyser and open it up.

ASHLEY: We're flying over-- swimming over.

MARISHA: So we're just exiting the cave in a safe and orderly manner, okay.

LAURA: As much as possible. I'm going to control the water a little bit below the surface so where it maybe gives more of a gap for people to swim through.

MATT: Okay, yeah, now that you see the width of the cavern, you can safely put the water off to the side. So easy enough for you to do, you watch as Jester from this side divides the singular upward waterfall geyser and leaves an open doorway, a pathway out into the lagoon itself. And you all one by one, swim your way through safely without having to make any saves. And you're now out into the bright day, sunlight, a blue, nearly cloudless sky. And as you look up, you can see along the mountain in the nearby jungle, that mist still hangs. But you are all are outside of the cavern safely. And what would you like to do?

LIAM: A plan so simple it just might work. (quiet laughter)

MARISHA: So fly now, walk later? Is that what we're doing?

LAURA: What's safer, do you think?

MATT: "Well, the mountain is treacherous in its own right. I don't know what creatures might be living on the northeastern side of it, if at all. And it is, at some points, crumbly and a bit of a fall could occur. As far as the exterior of the Ruin, I do not know what lies there. I've avoided it since I've been here."

LAURA: Let's fly now and walk towards the Ruins.

MARISHA: Yeah.

LAURA: That way we can know what we're approaching as we're--

MARISHA: Mm-hmm.

LAURA: We can do it stealthily.

MATT: All right.

TALIESIN: I like that.

MATT: "Very well." (whooshing) And you watch as Vilya suddenly leaps from the water and (whooshing) wings shoot out. (flapping)

LAURA: Oh god, be ready, Fjord.

MATT: She's now flying above, waiting.

TRAVIS: I'm not going first. Am I going first?

SAM: No, you're going with her.

MARISHA: Which I think is first. I think that is one and the same.

TRAVIS: I thought we were going to talk about this first, though, before we did this.

TALIESIN: The time for talking is over.

TRAVIS: I really don't know if that's ever true. (laughter)

SAM: Do you want to do--

MARISHA: Call back.

LAURA: Do you want to do parchment--

SAM: Parchment, Boulder, Shears?

LAURA: (laughing) Is that what it was?

SAM: Boulder, Parchment, Shears?

TRAVIS: Who am I doing it with?

SAM: Not me. I'm fine.

ASHLEY: Well, maybe I can go with her.

LAURA: Yasha and Beau.

MARISHA: I'll go. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, ready?

ASHLEY: Okay, ready?

TRAVIS: Wait, wait, all three of us are going?

SAM: Threeway, threeway, it's threeway.

ASHLEY: It feels like this is a dumb idea.

TRAVIS: Yeah, threeway!

MARISHA: Maybe it should just be just you two.

LAURA: No, no, no.

TRAVIS: Threeway, threeway.

MARISHA: Okay, okay.

TRAVIS: Uh, uh, uh.

MARISHA: Um.

LAURA: Oh wait. (laughter)

ASHLEY: Wait. (laughter)

TALIESIN: It's been a long week. Oh god. (laughter)

ASHLEY: That's why it doesn't work with three people.

TRAVIS: We'll just have to do it again. (laughter)

LIAM: I know threeways. That is not how you accomplish them. (laughter)

MATT: How have you all survived to level 12? (laughter)

ASHLEY: Oh my god.

LIAM: Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk, nyuk! (laughter)

TRAVIS: There's no way that happens twice.

LAURA: Yeah, yeah.

MARISHA: Okay, okay.

LAURA: Try it again.

TRAVIS: Ready, go.

ASHLEY: One, two, three.

TRAVIS: Yes, I win! (laughter)

ASHLEY: That means you're going with her?

TRAVIS: Yeah, I'm going. (laughter)

TRAVIS: That's how this game works. (screams) (laughter)

MATT: As Vilya's talons grasp you in the water and pull you from the lagoon. You guys watch as Fjord begins to crest off, ocean dripping from him below.

SAM: Well worth it. (laughter)

MARISHA: "I win, fuck you gu-- ah!"

MATT: All right.

ASHLEY: Holy moly.

MATT: What's the flight marching order here? (laughter)

LIAM: Mixing it up! I transform and grab the lesbians and take off.

MATT: All righty.

TALIESIN: All right, we're apparently we're together.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: All right.

MARISHA: Yasha, I'm flying. I'm really flying.

LAURA: I'm going to turn into a light blue owl today.

MATT: All right.

ASHLEY: I was going to say "You're doing it, Peter," but that's the wrong movie. (laughter) I'm very tired. (laughter)

ASHLEY: Wait, no--

TRAVIS: I'm tired now.

MATT: All right, so a bright blue--

LAURA: A light blue.

MATT: Light blue, which bird?

LAURA: Giant owl.

MATT: Giant owl, okay.

TRAVIS: Bangarang.

ASHLEY: I'm flying, Yasha!

LAURA: Although-- Yeah. Fuck it, I said it.

MATT: Sure.

TRAVIS: Oh my god.

LAURA: All right, Nott, get on my back.

SAM: Okay.

LAURA: Caduceus?

TALIESIN: All right, I'm doing the thing.

MATT: All right. So.

LAURA: While I fly, I'm going to hold my feet like this so Caduceus can just sit in my hands and let his feet dangle.

TALIESIN: Okay, that's much more, yeah.

TRAVIS: Enjoy some tea.

ASHLEY: Yes.

MATT: There you go.

ASHLEY: That's adorable.

TALIESIN: I have chai.

MATT: All right, so as the three birds coast--

TALIESIN: Pumpkin chai.

MATT: -- along the eastern side of the mountain, you can see the little wisps of cloud that are above. Just the little elements, little pockets of condensation in the atmosphere shooting by as you make your way around the eastern side of the island and over the volcanic edge. You can see the blackened smoke still rising, still thick and angry as it was the night before. As the first hour passes.

LAURA: So dumb.

TALIESIN: I'm so sorry.

TRAVIS: There're aftershocks. (laughter)

MATT: Oh yeah.

MARISHA: That's totally what it is. (laughter)

ASHLEY: We're the worst.

MARISHA: Oh, we're loopy. Okay, keep going. (laughter)

LIAM: (dramatically) Come to Critical Role for epic adventure. (laughter)

MATT: Oh no, no. Oh no. This is a problem.

LIAM: We better start the show over.

MATT: Yeah, I know, we got to start from the beginning. It's the only way. (laughter) Actually, yeah, as you guys are headed-- (laughter)

MATT: I have to-- as you head your way through the atmosphere, three-- two regular owls and one light blue one. We're going to go to break. (laughter)

SAM: Descent into madness. (laughter)

MATT: Give us a moment to cool down. (laughter)

ASHLEY: Oh my god.

MATT: We'll see you guys back here in a few minutes. Stay tuned.

TRAVIS: Oh shit.

Break
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The D and D Beyond player app places your Dungeons and Dragons characters into the palm of your hand. Access your character sheets and browse their stats Even when you're offline. Choose your spells and actions to master your class and find your next tale. Track hit points, spell slots, conditions, and features to make playing D and D smoother than ever before. This is beyond pen and paper. This is D and D Beyond.

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(grunting) (laughing) Would you look at that? I think it worked. You were right Pumat Number Three, all we had to do was invoke that subscription. Cantrip, Pumat Number Three? Oh boy. Well hello there. I'm Pumat Prime. It's good to finally join you here in the prime dimension. I see this as the Twitch prime realm, I think and, oh, we're in that Critical Role channel aren't we? (laughing) Wow, would you look at that, you got chat and everything. (laughing) Respectfully I was looking for the prime rib realm, but this isn't too bad. You see, if you already have access to the Amazon Prime realm, you can get a free subscription to the channel of your choice in the Twitch prime realm. The two realms have a pretty good working relationship after that peace treaty, the prime minister signed a few years back. You just have to remember renew your Twitch prime subscription at the top of each month, respectfully. And hey, if you're already a subscriber, you can spread the joy by gifting a subscription using the gift a sub button, that is assuming the empire hasn't sent the tax man to your shop here recently. (laughing) All right, well I'll have to find that darn elusive prime rib realm who knew the prime dimension had so many pockets. Good luck. (laughing) Pumat Three! (soft music) Subscribe. Resubscribe. Brian Foster is not a cabbage.

Part II
MATT: And welcome back. So everyone. As you make your way, as we left off. Flying, some as birds, some as passengers through the sky, over the mountainous regions of the volcano of Rumblecusp. Heading across the northern edge, you come to the end of the hour-long first length of the journey, in which those who are using the spell must re-up. So Jester and Caleb, I take it you spend another slot? Are you able to spend another slot?

LAURA: Yes, I'll spend a 5th-level.

MATT: All righty.

LAURA: Oh! Oh yeah. Two, two, yes.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: Oh yeah.

LAURA: We get two hours of it. These are my last time I can cast it, okay, good bye.

MATT: Okay, the brief stop on a somewhat shaky, but semi-safe place to take a moment. You all take a rest except for you, Vilya just keeps you up there.

TRAVIS: (gasping)

MARISHA: Just blood trickling down your arm.

TRAVIS: I feel ready.

MATT: You recast and then lift off once more. And as you take on this next leg of the journey, you can begin to see from above what you assume is where the Ruin resides. The thick dense jungle ahead of you eventually gives way. You can see the trees begin to turn brown and then begin to fall in. There is a region, a wide grove where the jungle has just died away and is now fallen and rotting vegetation into gray, dusty, rock-filled emptiness. You can see this texture to it at this distance. You're not quite sure what the landscape is other than the change in color. Any folks who also want to make a perception check, just in the general vicinity of the island around you.

SAM: Dinosaur check, dinosaur check.

MARISHA: What did you say?

LIAM: Are we still airborne?

MATT: You're still airborne, yes.

MARISHA: Oh, so we get advantage on our check.

MATT: You have advantage, but you have to use the modifier from your--

LAURA: Yes, which is nine, yo.

LIAM: Oh, I rolled terribly.

LAURA: 25.

LIAM: Not worth mentioning.

MARISHA: Natural 20.

LAURA: What what, Beau again!

SAM: Isn't that your third one tonight?

MARISHA: Second one.

SAM: Second one.

MARISHA: It's on a perception check, too.

TRAVIS: Fifth one tonight.

MARISHA: My eighth one tonight.

SAM: Whoa.

MARISHA: Monks are OP.

MATT: So Beauregard and owl-Jester. Looking down below, you do see, as you're moving ahead, covered mostly by the canopy, but on the north-northwestern side of where the mountain reaches the jungle, you can barely make out what looks like some sort of a chasm or a crack in the floor of the jungle that snakes through. You can see areas where some trees have slightly fallen in. And it just is this darkened crevasse.

LAURA: Is it far off of where we're flying?

MATT: Correct, it's far off from where you're flying, but you do notice. Just mark that as you're continuing forward. Towards the end of the second hour, you are getting closer to the point that you can start making out some details in the middle of this grayed space where the Ruin supposedly resides. But you're not going to be able to make it. You're going to have to stop, say about three or so miles beyond the boundary.

SAM: 30 or three?

MATT: Three.

SAM: Oh, okay.

MATT: Beyond the boundary there. So eventually you begin to crest lower and lower with your perception checks, you do see in the middle of this, while the area is gray, there was once a jungle here, or at least elements of it that has just fallen in and petrified. Rotted, and then petrified. So a lot of the wood elements you can see look sagged and partially sunken in, and then dried. Almost like they were frozen and then left to gray. You see a number of broken buildings. Maybe, like, a small village, a very small village of some kind that it is dilapidated. You can see structures that are mostly intact. And some that are just the bare bones exterior. The corners and the bare remnants of where they once stood. And there was a singular obelisk-like spire emerging from the center of that region. Too far to make out the details of it. But there is something, a larger central structure that rises up in the center at a slight angle.

TRAVIS: Anything in the air above it?

MATT: Not that you can make out at this moment.

ASHLEY: It's at a slight-- it's like--?

MATT: A very faint angle. But the mists that permeate to the jungle across the entire island do continue into this space. And the mists are now met with a heavy fog. A fog layer, that's why you can just make out the various details at this point. It is a fog-shrouded region.

LAURA: Oh no.

MATT: And you are coming down into the canopy. You begin to reach the point where you're going to have to slow down a bit or you're going to start whipping towards the top edges of the trees. And Vilya can keep this up, but you guys have to land eventually. And so after a moment, you all slowly begin to circle and then make your way safely through the canopy, amongst the high ends of the trees, and then down, touching onto the soft jungle floor. You can hear the sound of the insects and other creatures around you, the bird calls and other clicking creatures that live in the area. The soft floor meets your feet. And both of you revert back to your forms and you are gingerly placed down by Vilya before she returns to her humanoid self.

LAURA: How you doing, Fjord?

TRAVIS: Great. I am ready for more. Sad to be on the ground. The air is where I belong.

ASHLEY: Would you like to ride on my shoulders?

TRAVIS: No. But thank you.

ASHLEY: You're welcome.

LIAM: So the spire, you all saw that on the way in?

SAM: Yeah, it looks promising.

LIAM: Okay.

SAM: Could be something.

MARISHA: It's a word.

TALIESIN: Interesting, isn't it?

LAURA: Yeah. Where would it have come from? Like a building.

TRAVIS: Well, at an angle, and with everything around it dead, like a crater, almost.

MARISHA: I have a feeling, yeah.

LAURA: It's the shard?

MARISHA: I think this is where he crash landed.

TRAVIS: Or a reject pile or something?

LIAM: Yeah, when I throw a ball of flame, it looks a little bit like that afterwards.

TRAVIS: It's true.

LIAM: A little bit.

MARISHA: So he crash landed and then shards from other dimensions scattered like fallout, like debris. This could be, you know, ground zero.

TALIESIN: Does this look anything like, like the vision I had or is it too--

MATT: I mean.

TALIESIN: -- odd?

MATT: You didn't see any specifics other than shards of different locations within this realm and beyond being dragged through when this entity punctured beyond the Astral Sea and landed here. But you did not pick up specifics to the outside details.

TRAVIS: And underfoot, it's just dead, earthen, no moisture?

MATT: Once you're there. You haven't quite reached the perimeter. You guys are still a ways in the jungle.

LAURA: We're in the jungle right now.

LAURA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Gotcha.

MATT: Are you moving full pace? Are you moving through stealthily? What are you applying?

LAURA: We should be quiet.

LIAM: Carefully, yeah.

MATT: Okay, it is around noon at this time with the travel you've made. You're approaching noon. So you've made some decent time with the flight.

MARISHA: Like a medium pace? A medium pace.

LAURA: I wish it was nighttime already so that I could sleep and get my spells back.

MATT: Sorry.

SAM: Yeah, medium pace.

MATT: Okay, so not stealthy, just going casually.

SAM: Stealthy is slow. We've got three miles.

TRAVIS: We're trying to get to the jungle line, right? To the clearing?

LIAM: Yeah, once we start to lose tree cover-- I mean, I know there is a lot of fog, but the closer we get, maybe we could slow it.

SAM: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

MATT: Okay, what is the marching order, if you don't mind?

SAM: I'll go first.

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah, I'll be behind Veth.

TRAVIS: Rogue's going to rogue, right?

TALIESIN: I'll be behind you.

MATT: Veth and Beauregard.

SAM: Yep, expert perception, yep.

MARISHA: Yeah.

LIAM: I will be behind, Caleb after Caduceus.

MATT: Caleb after Caduceus. And it doesn't have to be a single file. I have Beauregard and Caduceus shoulder-to-shoulder.

LIAM: Then I will take five or 10 feet out to the side so I have a clear line of sight ahead of me.

MATT: Right there?

LIAM: Ja.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: I'll follow behind that.

MATT: All right.

TRAVIS: I'll be in the back, I suppose.

ASHLEY: Yeah, I'll stay in the back with Fjord.

MATT: Okay, Vilya will be coming up in the center with you, Jester.

LAURA: Okay.

TRAVIS: Swords in the back.

MATT: All right. Pushing through the sweltering jungle, the insects are thick, reminiscent of the mosquitoes that had pursued you when you first made it through. Vilya, however, as they arrive, you watch as she puts her hand up and creates this gust of wind that blows them back. As you press forward, she steps a little bit further up and begins to create this wind gust barrier to the front that keeps any insects from flying close enough to you, now that she's aware that it's an issue. You push forward through the jungle, pushing past the various heavy vines and tangles. She points out a few other danger spots or familiar bits of carnivorous vegetation. The similar blood-colored vines that you approached when you first arrived on the island are fairly thick in some elements of this region. Let's see, who's guiding this primarily? Who's the one who's taking point on this? Is that you, Veth?

SAM: I guess so.

MATT: Make a survival check for me, if you don't mind.

SAM: That's me. I'm in the lead. Natural 20. (cheering)

MATT: A total of?

SAM: 21!

MATT: There we go.

TRAVIS: Oh, shit.

MATT: Easy enough. Thankfully, you were taking stock while you were descending towards the jungle. And in the brief moment before you broke the canopy, you paid attention to as many landmark trees and the general direction you had to continue to go based on the direction of the sun in a way that would make Caleb proud. And with that, you press on without veering from the path, taking the shortest route possible. You begin to notice the coloration of the jungle around you begin to shift. You can see the vines are beginning to sag. The branches are beginning to slightly bow. You can see the thick lush foliage beginning to curl at the edges, begin to brown. The ground itself gives off this sweet, musky smell of rotting vegetation. And as you continue forward, it begins to wither.

LAURA: Wait, wait. Before we go fully into, like, the dead stuff.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: I'm going to use my charm of plant command.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: And I forget, it's not like. Oh, that isn't like, Speak with Plants, is it?

MATT: Speak with Plants is you can talk to them.

LAURA: Yeah, is that basically the same? Oh, that is what it is. I Speak with Plants.

TALIESIN: Yep.

LAURA: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm going to talk to a tree.

MATT: Okay, you walk up to one that's still living though it's starting to wither a little bit.

LAURA: Oh, how are you feeling? Are you okay?

MATT: (low-pitched and sad) "Not really."

LAURA: What happened to you?

TRAVIS: I love the tree.

MATT: "Ah, it's been like this for a while. It's...icky."

LAURA: Yeah, it looks like it feels icky.

MATT: "Yeah."

LAURA: Oh man. Do you-- you don't remember what it was that caused this?

MATT: "Uh."

LAURA: How many rings have you gotten since it's happened? (laughter)

MATT: "I haven't looked." (laughter)

TRAVIS: Shit.

MARISHA: It's Cad-spruces.

TALIESIN: Aw. (laughter) Wow.

ASHLEY: Good one.

MARISHA: No. (laughter)

MATT: "It's a rough place around here."

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: "I'm one of the lucky ones."

LAURA: Yeah, it looks like if you'd have been a little bit further in-- oof. Bad news bears.

MATT: "You're telling me. Some of the others are losing their minds."

LAURA: Oh, really? Like how?

MATT: "Like their minds are being lost."

LAURA: Wow. What would make you feel better? Do you know?

MATT: "I could move back a little bit more."

LAURA: Yeah, that would be great. I'll see what I can do about that, okay?

MATT: "Oh, that's very swell, thank you."

LAURA: You're welcome. Hmm. You don't remember how long you've been like this at all?

MATT: "I mean, I don't know. Better part of half a century, maybe."

LAURA: That's a long time. So I'll try to get it fixed for you, okay?

MATT: "I appreciate that. That's real nice."

LAURA: All right, well, see you around.

MATT: "Bye."

LAURA: Bye. Ooh. Poor guy.

TRAVIS: Not very, um, chipper?

LAURA: No, he sounds like he is just real, you know, almost drunk, but like just ugh, like, fatigued.

LIAM: The tree did?

LAURA: Yeah.

LIAM: What does that sound like?

LAURA: Kind of like Caduceus?

TALIESIN: Yeah.

LAURA: He said it could have been, like, around 50 years that he's been like this.

SAM: Wow.

TRAVIS: So 25, and now potentially 50.

TALIESIN: Makes you think.

TRAVIS: Generations.

MARISHA: I mean, it tracks, yeah. With the information that we know.

LIAM: Plus trees we know now have units of measurement.

MARISHA: Yeah, who fucking knew that? LIAM and

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MARISHA: I mean, it makes sense.

LAURA: Seasons.

MARISHA: Huh?

SAM: Sure, seasons.

LAURA: They can see the sun.

MARISHA: Yeah, and they grow rings.

LAURA: Yeah.

MARISHA: You know.

TALIESIN: If you lost all your hair every year, I mean, you could probably keep count.

MARISHA: Yeah, exactly.

LAURA: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

LIAM: Do you?

TALIESIN: No, no, of course. I mean, I can keep count. Oh, I mean, to be fair, I didn't really keep count, now that I think about it. Would have helped. Yeah, no, you got me there.

LAURA: Do you know if-- is there a way we can just, like, move this tree back a few? Vilya, can we move this tree back a little bit?

MATT: "Um...We can try?"

TRAVIS: But, Jester, aren't we trying to be a tad bit--

SAM: This is our side quest now?

TRAVIS: Low impact?

LAURA: Well, it's just he's-- okay, but he sounded really sad.

SAM: If we solve the crisis on the island, this won't be a problem at all.

TRAVIS: Good.

LAURA: That is true, that is true.

MATT: "You're sure about that?"

SAM: No, but I'm also like, I don't know, it's a tree, you know?

LAURA: Hey man, he has-- he-- he was talking to me. Just like you're talking to me right now, Veth.

SAM: I don't mean to be heartless. It's just that--

LAURA: Just because he can't, you know, talk to everybody or get up and walk around doesn't mean he's any less of a person.

TRAVIS: No, he's not a person.

SAM: Yeah, he's not a person.

MARISHA: (laughs) (snorts)

SAM: All I'm saying is, I bet if you talk to each of these trees, they would have their own tree story, their own tree past and their own tree family.

LAURA: Yeah!

SAM: And I think that as sad as that is, it's better to concentrate on all of them as a whole, rather than that one tree.

LAURA: That's true. If we moved him back then all the other trees next to him would be really sad that they didn't get chosen to be pushed back, right?

SAM: Yeah.

TRAVIS: (snorts)

LAURA: This is complicated.

TRAVIS: (muffled laughs)

SAM: Every tree has a story.

TRAVIS: I just start walking towards the--

MATT: Okay, so you guys are progressing in the same order then?

LAURA: Yes?

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: Same medium pace?

MARISHA: Uh, it's starting to get a little weird.

MATT: You're starting to--

LIAM: Slow it down and be warier and listen. Listen for any kind of threat.

TALIESIN: Eyes peeled.

MATT: All right. So two of you who are taking point, go ahead and roll perception checks. And I would, once we finished that, I would like at group stealth check. Because you guys are slowing to a stealthy pace.

TALIESIN: All right, perception.

SAM: I guess-- oh, you guys are doing perception?

LIAM: I did well.

TALIESIN: I did well as well.

LIAM: 25.

TALIESIN: 26.

SAM: Oh.

MATT: All right. So you guys are keeping a pretty, pretty, a pretty intense look as you progress forward. Everybody, please make a stealth check.

LAURA: Wait, I can-- I'm going to cast Pass Without a Trace on us.

MARISHA: Ooh. One of my favies.

LAURA: And I'm going to bless Fjord.

TRAVIS: Thank you.

LAURA: Blessing of the Trickster. Not like Bless blessed.

TRAVIS: Blessing of the Trickster, which is what?

LAURA: Advantage on stealth checks.

TRAVIS: Oh. Blessing of the Trickster.

MATT: So stealth checks, Fjord.

TRAVIS: 27.

LAURA: Did you add 10?

TRAVIS: Yes.

LAURA: 21.

LIAM: 20.

SAM: 39.

LIAM: Yeah.

ASHLEY: 17.

TALIESIN: 28.

MARISHA: 25.

MATT: Okay, and Vilya rolled okay.

ASHLEY: Yep.

MATT: Pressing forward--

MARISHA: Some things never change.

ASHLEY: Old habits die hard.

MARISHA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Evergreen.

MATT: The canopy begins to have larger holes. You can see where trees have fallen and left open sky. And as you push forward further, the canopy eventually begins to fall away. Caduceus and Caleb, you begin to see some movement in the canopies as well. You see some of the leaves shake. And shift heavily. And you glance over and you see one of the trees seems to have partially uprooted itself and then step forward. Its body is gnarled. And this spreading, gray color is winding through its trunk and up through its bark. Branches themselves, some hang in this awful withered limb-like appearance, while other parts appear semi-healthy. And you can see it erratically begin step around this, large, living, awakened tree-like creature. And as it steps a few times it stops and then shakes and twitches.

LAURA: Oh, I don't like.

MATT: And right as it does that, you hear this (clicking) clicking sound beginning to come from deep within a resonant hollow within its trunk. As it does two other trees (whooshing) shake (crunching).

TALIESIN: I think we've got a problem.

MATT: Then begin to shimmy slightly to follow it before they both stop and come to rest for a moment. Gently swaying, though no breeze finds it. They gently sway. (clicking)

LAURA: Does it look like they noticed us?

MATT: Nope.

MARISHA: Oh.

SAM: Every tree has a story. Some are bad.

MATT: They do not know you're present. You all feel pretty well hidden, at the moment. What would you like to do?

SAM: Are they just standing in our path?

MATT: There's one, that's a little ways to the left of you. And there's two other ones that are about a hundred or so feet from it, different directions. You can try and do a wide circle around or you could brave going between.

LAURA: Do they make clicking noises consistently, even if they're not moving?

MATT: It's not consistent.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: It goes this eerie, quiet for a while. And you can hear some of the leaves swaying a bit. You can hear some-- actually, at this point, the creature sounds have stopped. The sounds of the various bugs, birds, other calls that you're used to in the jungle have gone silent. And so it's just quiet. And then about every... 30 seconds to every two minutes you hear nearby or distant (clicking).

SAM: Oh, boy.

LIAM: Do they blend in with other trees remains around them?

MATT: Somewhat, and they vary as well. But there is definitely a visible sickness to them.

MARISHA: Caduceus, have you ever seen anything like this?

TALIESIN: Just for shits and giggles, I'm going to burn an Eyes of the Grave to see if these are undead constructs.

SAM: Undead trees?

MATT: Okay. You can stealth to get close enough to sense for it.

TALIESIN: 60 feet.

MATT: Yeah. There is an undead essence to them. These trees are no longer living.

SAM: Zombie trees.

MARISHA: Clickers!

LAURA: Zombie fucking trees!

TRAVIS: That's new.

TALIESIN: Recommend we try and just avoid these things.

SAM: They can't be very fast. If we created a diversion, we could probably just run past them.

TALIESIN: They can be very fast.

SAM: You're talking about trees. They're made of wood, they're dead.

LAURA: Haven't you ever seen 28 Days Later? Some zombies are really fast.

SAM: Did you say 28 Trees Later? (laughter)

ASHLEY: We don't know how fast they can move.

TALIESIN: That's a lot of assumption.

TRAVIS: We really should try to go around, yeah?

LAURA: Yeah, yeah, go around.

TALIESIN: Carts don't have legs and they're very fast.

SAM: That is really smart.

TALIESIN: Haven't you ever noticed?

SAM: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Ships are made of wood, they're very fast.

SAM: What else is fast?

TRAVIS: -- go around the danger.

TALIESIN: Squirrels are very fast.

SAM: They have legs.

TALIESIN: Oh, that's fair. Fish are very fast.

SAM: They don't have legs.

TALIESIN: No, they're hard to catch.

SAM: Snakes-- all right, let's go.

MATT: Okay. So you guys begin--

TALIESIN: I'm getting into this.

MATT: -- take a wide circle around these three and you make your way around the outer edge carefully, quietly, moving along. You manage to scoot past the third one to the far right to curve around the path. As you push past from the other trees, you hear very loudly directly above you. (clicking)

SAM: Oh.

MATT: (clicking)

LIAM: Hey, Abbot!

MATT: The roots begin to pull out of the dry ground. You can see elements of the cracked earth begin to rise and splinter with it. And as it does, they fall into the sinkhole, left behind as one of six thick roots begin to pull their way up. And it begins to shift forward. You all quietly move around and keep from touching or being bowled over by them. I need everyone to make a dexterity saving throw.

SAM: Ooh, snapkins.

MARISHA: Dex save, okay.

TRAVIS: Does Pass Without a Trace give us anything?

LAURA: Nope.

MATT: It does not.

ASHLEY: Advantage.

SAM: Advantage?

ASHLEY: I get advantage on dex.

MATT: Fjord.

TRAVIS: Eight.

LAURA: 16.

LIAM: I rolled a one, but I will use ring of evasion to succeed.

MATT: All right, you've got it.

SAM: 24.

MATT: 24. Yasha? You do get advantage on it because you can see it.

ASHLEY: I know I rolled the same thing, 10.

MATT: 10, okay.

TALIESIN: 19.

MATT: Great.

MARISHA: 22.

MATT: 22. And Vilya. In this extra quiet almost group dance-like series of maneuvers. You all, making eye contact, begin to duck and weave and shift between hanging roots and falling bits of vegetation, low-hanging branches, as it steps through and around you. (cracking and moving noises) (clicking) (thudding) And begins shifting westward, leaving you all there. The hairs on the back of your neck stood up, sweat pouring down the back of your neck. And you all slowly begin to continue your path northward towards the outer circle.

LAURA: Did it seem like they have eyes? Do you see--?

MATT: You don't see any eyes.

LAURA: Like, any kind of facial features at all.

MATT: No.

LAURA: Weird.

MATT: And it's only when they start moving that your brain begins to look for humanoid-like shifting and that's in the way the branches sway. It would be a creature with dozens of arms and multiple legs with a tall, thin body with hanging, sagging hair, that would be the leaves and bits of vines hanging off of it. But once they stop moving and hold still, then it just becomes another tree in the vicinity.

SAM: But they all were wearing underwear.

MATT: Every single one of them, big fans of MeUndies. Pressing forward, eventually the canopy ends. All forest cover is now gone. As all the trees before you have fallen. And it is just a sea of fallen, overlapping and rotting trunks and dead vegetation. Just this textured graveyard of nature before you. And the mist begins to form into the fog. And you can just barely make out the darkened shape of that spire in the center of it. You're still moving forward stealthily?

SAM: I think so.

TRAVIS: It sure feels counter to logic to move towards the thing that's radiating death.

SAM: Yeah, but that's what we--

TRAVIS: Oh, I'm just stating the obvious.

TALIESIN: Also, we're going to want to check out any of those buildings that are between us and it.

LAURA: Are there buildings?

TRAVIS: I thought there were, like, remnants of buildings.

MATT: From what you can see from that distance, there were shapes that looked like structures or parts of structures, but from the distance and the-- well, only because you rolled so fucking high.

LAURA: ? From a distance. ?

MATT: With the fog as well, you could make out no detail. Just like the shadows of the shapes.

SAM: ? God is watching. ? Sorry.

MATT: So are you continuing? At a medium pace, or at a stealthy pace?

LIAM: Stealthy pace.

MATT: All right, all right.

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: So you begin to move forward.

LIAM: Hunched over, creeping.

MATT: You are now, at this point in the journey, with walking the miles there at a stealthy pace. You are now in the early afternoon. So you're getting around two o'clock.

MARISHA: And how much further does it feel like we're going?

LAURA: Are we going to camp here?

TRAVIS: I just don't want to be here when the sun goes down, I think.

LAURA: How are we going to--

MARISHA: How much further?

MATT: You can get there in about, at this pace, about an hour, hour and a half.

SAM: No problem.

MARISHA: Okay.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: We may have to retreat a little faster than we came in, but--

LIAM: Correct.

MATT: Okay. Now, going forward, because of the fallen trees, there are plenty of places where you can move and try and find ways to obfuscate yourself from being just out in the open. And the fog does help, but it is a blue sky above, and it is an odd thing to see a blue sky with just small little puffs of clouds. It is a beautiful tropical day. And then it just comes down into this thick fog. But you move forward. I will say, pushing onward at a stealthy pace, nothing seems to broach you on your journey. Nothing interrupts you. Eventually, you begin to see the shapes arriving, these outer structures, these buildings, these skeletons of homes begin to come into your vision.

LAURA: Homes?

TALIESIN: Yep.

MATT: You can see some appear to be collapsed abodes, buildings of pale stone.

LAURA: There's going to be so many dead people.

MATT: If anybody here is proficient in history, go ahead and make a history check.

LIAM: Come on.

SAM: One of us? There's two of us.

LIAM: 16.

MATT: 16.

MARISHA: 17.

MATT: 17, okay. Looking at these buildings, what elements you can make out. They are not of Dwendalian make. They are not of Concordian make, nor are they of Dynasty make. So-- the Clovis Concord.

SAM: Oh yeah.

MATT: So these-- Elements of it remind you of Rosohna. Or at least the ruins on the outside of Rosohna and the Ghostlands. That's the closest thing you can equate them towards. There are similarities to that heavy, heavy ruined area that resides beyond the city of the Dynasty. And that's all you know on that.

ASHLEY: Similarity, what's--

TRAVIS: Which is also a wasteland.

ASHLEY: What's the heavy ruined area?

TRAVIS: It was up north of Xhorhas, it was, like, a barren wasteland. It's where we were chasing you and Obann.

LIAM: I'm going to keep my eyes peeled, too, for any kind of writing, even if I don't--

MATT: Okay, make a perception check for me.

LIAM: Okay. 18.

MATT: Okay. Now, as you guys continue onward-- My playlist order got messed up here, so I'm relearning everything. The air itself is growing cold. Similar to that first strange pocket of the jungle that you encountered when Vilya was leading you towards the mountain, but colder still, the closer you travel through these Ruins. You notice sheets of ice forming on the edge of some of these stone structures. You begin to see your breath merge with the mist and fog around you. It is quite cold the further and further you move towards the center. And as you step into this broken element of the remnants of some fallen structure, parts of stone and possibly what were once upper floors now scattered into broken rock around you, the shape begins to emerge of the center spire. You notice it is a tower. It is a built tower. Part of one. The tower itself is not angled, but only part of the tower is here. You can see where it would be built. This perfect continuously kind of-- what am I'm looking for-- every layer of this tower grows smaller and taller as it goes, this escalation of structure, but it looks sheared at a perfect angle. Like it was carved from top to bottom, perfectly. Like some god had cut it with an axe and as such, it is just at an odd angle.

LIAM: Sliced and taken away?

SAM: So it's not leaning, it's straight--

MATT: It's not leaning.

SAM: -- it's just been diagonally bisected.

MATT: And it's only part of a tower. Meaning there is a much larger tower and this is just a small section of it that's been carved away.

MARISHA: It's a little slice of the Abyssal Plane.

TRAVIS: Is the line, like, sharp or jagged?

MATT: The line, from what you can see from this far, it looks pretty sharp. You and you, Caduceus and Beauregard, hear what you think are whispers. Voices.

MARISHA: You hear that?

TALIESIN: Eyes of the Grave.

MATT: Okay. Part of it, as you first hear them, some of it seems to be Common. Some of it is another language. Anyone here understand or speak Infernal?

LAURA: Yes!

MARISHA: Yes, get it, tiefling, yes!

MATT: You do not hear the whispers yet, unfortunately. But if you point it out to her, she can begin to listen in.

TALIESIN: Does anyone else hear that?

LAURA: Hear what?

TALIESIN: It's, like, a (whispering sounds)

MATT: You begin to hear--

SAM: Muppets?

MATT: -- in Common, phrases that resemble, "Your warmth is ours."

SAM: What is ours?

ALL: Your warmth.

SAM: Ugh. (laughter)

MATT: "Oracs demands our return."

MARISHA: Oracs?

MATT: Oracs demands our return.

TRAVIS: Oracs?

LAURA: Is that his name?

TRAVIS: How would one spell such a name?

MATT: O-R-A-C-S.

LAURA: O-R-A-C-S.

LAURA: You, Jester pick up in Infernal. "Broken and taken. Displaced, we suffer."

LAURA: We suffer.

MARISHA: Oh, shit.

MATT: As you guys stand in the midst of these Ruins and you use Eyes of the Grave. There, there, there, there. You are surrounded by five.

LAURA: What's going on?

TALIESIN: Do you want to talk, or do you want to make this ugly?

MARISHA: I think we should talk.

TALIESIN: We have things to offer you. More than warmth.

MATT: You begin to see, out of the fog, as they swirl, you see a face and it's gone.

TRAVIS: In the fog?

MATT: In the fog.

LAURA: Ooh, creepy.

MATT: Another hand and the profile of a woman's face (gasps) and then vanishes in the mist around you. Ahead of you, towards where the base of the tower shape is, something from the shadow seems to emerge. You watch as darkened, billowing, black clouds You watch as darkened, billowing, black clouds of lightless mist begin to unfold and roll out as tendrils as something rises from it. You can see a humanoid form, its shoulders coming to these hooked points. Tattered bits of shroud and black sackcloth hanging from the edges of its wrists. You see a blade dangling from one hand and a skeletal face folds up from the inside of it. "(gasping)"

LAURA: Can I speak Infernal to it?

MATT: If you'd like to.

LAURA: I'm going to speak Infernal and say: Let us get you home.

MARISHA: Yes!

MATT: "How?"

SAM: Good question.

MARISHA: Tell him, fuck Vokodo.

MATT: I'm going to go ahead and ask you guys to roll initiative. (yelling)

SAM: This frightening combat is sponsored by Dwarven Forge. Get ready to journey out into the wildlands, Dwarven Forge's eighth terrain Kickstarter launching Sunday, August 9th, join the mailing list. dwarvenforge.com/wildlands.

TRAVIS: What the fuck? Look at that!

SAM: That's a big tower. That's way bigger than I thought it was.

MARISHA: So is it from the Astral Sea or is it from, like, one of the layers of Hell?

LIAM: I think a layer of Hell.

MARISHA: Is this like--

SAM: I thought we were going to see fucking dinosaurs over here.

MARISHA: Yeah, this is a slice of the City of Dis or something, right?

LIAM: Yeah, this is just, like, one side of a tower--

MARISHA: A hundred percent, yeah.

LIAM: And everybody that was in it, is here.

MARISHA: Is here, and pissed off. Well, okay, wait. Oracs.

LAURA: Who's Oracs?

LIAM: It's a Dr. Seuss character.

MATT: Make a history check.

LAURA: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

MARISHA: Can any of us do that? Before initiative?

MATT: I'll allow it.

LIAM: 21.

MARISHA: Okay, okay, okay, hang on. That was my initiative. Okay, 19.

MATT: 19, does not ring a bell.

LIAM: 21 either?

LAURA: 21.

TRAVIS: 21 doesn't do it?

SAM: Deep knowledge.

MATT: Nope.

SAM: Hidden, hidden mysteries.

LIAM: Old magic.

TRAVIS: What about Scaro?

SAM: Ooh, that's it backwards?

TRAVIS: Yeah.

SAM: Definitely, everyone talks backwards in Hell. That's right.

MATT: All right.

ASHLEY: Why does that sound familiar?

SAM: Scaro?

TRAVIS: It sounds like Orcus, Horn of Orcus, but--

LIAM: Orthax, a little bit.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

ASHLEY: But the--

MATT: 25 to 20?

TRAVIS: Do you remember it?

MARISHA: 22.

MATT: 22.

ASHLEY: No, I don't think so.

SAM: Oh, 21.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: 21.

MATT: 20 to 15.

TALIESIN: 17.

ASHLEY: 17.

MARISHA: Oh, wow.

SAM: What can I do against dead people?

TALIESIN: Need magic.

MATT: 15 to 10.

LAURA: 13.

MATT: 13.

MARISHA: Shit.

MATT: Ten to five.

LAURA: Uh-oh.

MATT: Five to one? Three?

TRAVIS: Four.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: (nervous noise)

MATT: All right, top of the round. Actually, because I can do this now.

SAM: Ooh. The foggy foggies.

TRAVIS: Yes!

TALIESIN: Oh, I've been missing this.

MATT: Been a while.

TRAVIS: Light up my body with that smoke, bitch.

LAURA: I'm warm and I'm cold at the same time.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MARISHA: I don't think I have anything to try and negotiate with these people.

TRAVIS: Why would you negotiate?

LAURA: They're so angry.

MARISHA: They're so mad.

TALIESIN: I think that maybe they're part of the people looking for Vokodo. I don't know.

MARISHA: Well, that's the thing like--

TRAVIS: Can you banish one of them back to their plane?

LAURA: Don't want to waste it.

MARISHA: Fight Vokodo with us?

LAURA: Well, no, I can't do shit because I don't have any 4th- or 5th-level spells left.

TALIESIN: Do you have Turn Undead?

TRAVIS: Why not? Why'd you get rid of them? (fake laughter)

MATT: All righty. So top of the round is Beauregard. As you can now see all these shapes coming out of the mist around you, what are you going to do?

TALIESIN: Oh my god, look at that.

TRAVIS: It's so dope. It's so great. What happens if we do this?

MARISHA: Is this-- is there, like, a big baddy up in front of me that I'm seeing? Is that a big baddy? Who looks the beefiest?

MATT: This is the one that you saw that evoked these black tendrils of shadow amongst the mist and fog.

LAURA: Oh my god.

MARISHA: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah, let's go for him, I guess.

SAM: We're just attacking?

MARISHA: What else do I got?

LAURA: We rolled initiative.

SAM: Yeah, but they haven't done anything towards us. She just asked a question. They haven't answered.

ASHLEY: Nice.

LAURA: It's true.

MATT: Kids.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MARISHA: These are hell spawn that are going to fuck our shit up.

LAURA: It's up to you, Beau, go for it.

SAM: Every tree has a story.

MARISHA: Those trees would fucking murder us and you know it. I'm going to fucking punch this guy in his face.

SAM: Don't ghost punch yet.

TRAVIS: Will your finger indicate again where the wraith, not the main dude.

MATT: There, there, there, and there.

TRAVIS: One, two, three, and four. Okay, so five total.

MATT: Beauregard, what are you doing?

MARISHA: Punching him in his face.

SAM: Ghost punch.

MARISHA: Ghost punch!

MATT: Moving straight through.

MARISHA: Last time I tried to negotiate with a spooky thing, It fucking... didn't work.

LAURA: You learned your lesson.

SAM: That was hardly a negotiation.

MARISHA: Yeah, it was!

SAM: You mocked it from behind it.

MARISHA: But it didn't work, am I right? It didn't work.

SAM: "Ooh-ooh-ooh, I'm sad." That's how I negotiate.

MARISHA: I tried to empathize, and I'm done empathizing with ghosts.

ASHLEY: Ooh, he's scary.

TRAVIS: Go with what you know.

LAURA: Yeah, no he's scary.

MATT: Okay, go for it, Beauregard.

MARISHA: Okay.

LIAM: That bastard did not want to negotiate.

MARISHA: Pop pop. That first pop is a 26.

MATT: That hits.

MARISHA: Second pop is a 17.

MATT: Both hit.

MARISHA: Okay.

MARISHA: Using my fists to punch with ghosts.

TALIESIN: Between the two of us--

SAM: Two clerics?

MARISHA: First one is eight damage.

LIAM: You can turn in the same turn.

MARISHA: Second one is also eight damage.

SAM: We could convince them to help us.

MARISHA: So 16 total. Stunning Strike on that first one.

TRAVIS: There you go.

MARISHA: For my second. I should've stunning struck him first.

MATT: That'd be--

LIAM: Can you stun a ghost?

MATT: 17?

MARISHA: Save.

MATT: Save, okay.

MARISHA: But Stunning Strike on the second.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: Pop, pop.

LAURA: You can stun a ghost?

LIAM: Can you stun? That's my question.

MATT: That is a 20. MARISHA and

TRAVIS: Apparently not.

LIAM: Well, we just haven't found out yet.

TRAVIS: Two ki points.

MATT: So your first two strikes.

LIAM: I think the answer is no.

MARISHA: A Flurry of Blows.

MATT: All right, two more strikes, go for it.

LAURA: Is it landing? Are you hitting him?

MARISHA: I'm hitting him.

MATT: Yeah. Monks can punch ghosts at a certain level. And she is doing it.

MARISHA: My fists are magic.

LIAM: Ki, fists wrapped in ki.

MARISHA: Okay, a-pop pop. Yikes, yikes! A one and a two!

LAURA: Oh no.

MARISHA: So 11 and 12.

MATT: Both miss. So with the first two strikes, you could see the shaded undead, spectral creature, looking over and talking to Jester in Infernal. You rush up and punch it twice. As both impacts hit its chest, you see the mist around it swirl and the shadow spikes for a second. The inside of its dark sockets suddenly burn bright red.

LAURA: Uh-oh.

MATT: And it (gasping) back towards you. You swing two more times and it moves around each fist. Like it's not even there.

MARISHA: I'm going to say: Fuck Vokodo, am I right?

MATT: (rasping roar)

MARISHA: See? They can't be negotiated with. (laughter)

MATT: Veth, it's your turn.

SAM: Well, I guess my options are limited.

MARISHA: No, you can try and talk to it.

SAM: So I will take a few steps to my left.

MATT: All right. Two, three.

SAM: Well, you know what, I'll fire first then I'll step. So I will take out a bit of fur, rub it on my bolt and cast Brenatto's Voltaic Bolt.

MATT: All righty.

SAM: Then I will fire my bolt at the creature that's engaged with Beauregard.

MATT: Go for it.

LIAM: "I rub some fur on the bolt."

SAM: Natural one.

LAURA: Oh no!

SAM: So it shoots me.

MATT: Yes. (groaning)

SAM: Yeah, so it's not just six points of damage. It's 4d6.

MATT: Correct, because you shot yourself with your own spell.

ASHLEY: Oh my god.

SAM: Not a great start.

LAURA: I think he loved it.

SAM: 11 points of damage. (yelps)

TRAVIS: Good, good, good.

ASHLEY: That's a side effect of it not working?

SAM: If I roll a one with this particular weapon, it will misfire. I also just made it way more powerful.

MATT: Yes. Yes, it's beautiful.

SAM: Cool, cool, cool.

ASHLEY: Cool cool.

TRAVIS: Good spell.

TALIESIN: Yeah, that was great.

TRAVIS: That was the worst.

SAM: So yeah.

TRAVIS: Fun as long as you don't roll--

LIAM: Cellphone.

SAM: I don't know what to do now. I guess I'll--

TRAVIS: Act like you're dead.

SAM: I'll hide-- nope. I've got nothing. I will tactical retreat. Tactical retreat! I'm going backwards.

MATT: You're going backwards? All right, where are you going?

TRAVIS: Into the one that's behind you?

SAM: No, between the two that are behind us.

LAURA: Just straight into the building.

MATT: Over here?

SAM: Yeah. Yeah.

LIAM: Oh boy.

MATT: Full movement?

LIAM: That's a great spot to be.

SAM: Sure!

TRAVIS: Splitting the enemy.

LAURA: What are you doing?

TRAVIS: Yeah, yeah, yeah, now go in the tower! Go in the tower! Maybe there's an off switch to this nightmare.

MATT: That ends Veth's turn. The other spectral creatures are next.

TRAVIS: Just the only ones on the map, right?

TALIESIN: Oh, darn. Ah. Why did you-- ah! No.

MATT: This one is going to move up to Yasha. This one's going to move up to Fjord. This one is going to move up to Beauregard. And this one is going to move up to Caduceus. I need Yasha, Fjord, Beauregard, and Caduceus to all make charisma saving throws for me.

ASHLEY: Wonderful.

MARISHA: Shit.

LAURA: Fuck.

MARISHA: Not good!

TRAVIS: Nipples on a horse.

MARISHA: Charisma?

LAURA: Fucking fuck.

LIAM: Oh no.

TRAVIS: 20.

MARISHA: Oh no. Ooh, okay, okay. 16.

SAM: Charisma saves.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: Nine.

MATT: And Yasha?

TRAVIS: What did you do, what did you do?

ASHLEY: I rolled a four and I get a minus one, so a three.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: You're going to have to Turn Undead real quick.

MARISHA: Yeah, help?

ASHLEY: Why did I roll that?

TRAVIS: Why are you taking them away?

MARISHA: Who are you taking?

LIAM: Because they're possessed.

TRAVIS: Oh, fuck!

MARISHA: No. Way.

MATT: You watch as two of these creatures suddenly jump into Yasha's torso and she tenses as it vanishes inside, her whole body tenses and pulls back and then--

TRAVIS: Oh no.

ASHLEY: I'm just an empty shell of a person.

MATT: Caduceus, you try and resist, but before you can go for the symbol of the Wild Mother, you see it leaps into your throat and goes through your mouth, and for a second you tense, and pull back before your arms go limp to the side. And you stand there.

ASHLEY: Gerd derm it.

MATT: And your consciousness is removed and you're now watching yourself puppeted from within.

MARISHA: This is adding to Yasha's complex.

MATT: Both Beauregard and Fjord, you do manage to--

LIAM: Susceptible.

MATT: -- shunt them off, resist their attempt to push into your body and as such, they shriek and re-present themselves.

TRAVIS: Not today, Satan! (laughter)

MATT: All righty.

TRAVIS: ? Get thee behind me! ?

MATT: So that ends their go. It's now Caduceus and Yasha's turn.

SAM: Oh no.

MATT: With that, Yasha turns around towards you, Jester.

LAURA: Yep.

MATT: And Caduceus is going to go ahead and turn towards Vilya. I need you to make an attack with your blight staff.

TALIESIN: Gotcha.

LAURA: "Blight"? Blight?

TALIESIN: That's a 12.

MATT: A 12? That misses.

TALIESIN: I'm not good with my stick.

MATT: So as you turn around and swing your blight staff towards Vilya, she pulls back and two of the vines from her leg whip out and deflect it off to the side. No impact. Yasha, I need you to make two attacks against Jester.

LAURA: No, Yasha, fight it.

TRAVIS: Is this something you're going to make saves against or do we have to hit you?

LAURA: Fight it!

ASHLEY: We'll find out. We'll use the same dice. Okay, good. Let's see, let's see, let's see. 16.

LAURA: No.

ASHLEY: Okay, second attack. That was a little better. That's 19.

LAURA: 19 is my armor class.

MATT: So go ahead and roll your damage.

ASHLEY: Okay.

TRAVIS: You just punched her, right?

LAURA: I'm looking at you dead in the eyes as it's happening.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

LAURA: Yeah.

ASHLEY: I rolled snake eyes.

LAURA: Oh, good.

ASHLEY: Six total. Or wait, no, I'm so sorry. Yep.

TRAVIS: That seems low.

LAURA: It does.

ASHLEY: It does seem low, doesn't it?

TRAVIS: But you're not raging.

ASHLEY: I'm not raging.

MATT: Correct.

LAURA: So six points of damage?

ASHLEY: Six points of damage.

MATT: All right. So as Yasha is just, like, dead stare, slamming the blade into you, you're pushing off the shield and one gets you on the edge of the shoulder. Impact pain. You look back up and it's still that dead expression in her face.

ASHLEY: My heart's not into it.

MATT: Aww.

ASHLEY: You can tell.

MATT: All right, finishing their go, it is now the shadow creature's turn.

TALIESIN: Cool.

MATT: The shadow creature, the red piercing eyes angrily stare at Beauregard who came fist first toward it. It is going to go ahead and attempt to take its blade and swing towards you with one strike.

MARISHA: Right.

MATT: Ooh, that's a 25 to hit.

MARISHA: Yep, that hits, yep.

TRAVIS: Wow.

MARISHA: Should have done Patient Defense, yep.

MATT: 11 points of slashing damage.

MARISHA: Okay.

MATT: As well as 15 points of necrotic damage.

MARISHA: So wait, hang on, hang on, hang on. Wait, wait. 11 and then 15.

MATT: Correct.

MARISHA: So 26 total.

MATT: And then with it's other hand it's going to attempt to push. 20. Does that hit?

MARISHA: No, it does not.

MATT: Does not.

MARISHA: 21 is my armor class.

MATT: With its other hand is it pulls back, you watch black energy swirl around the forearm and it thrusts it forward to try and reach into your chest.

MARISHA: I've seen this, I've seen this!

MATT: And as you do, you just deflect it out of the way. No purchase found.

TRAVIS: What does that do?

TALIESIN: Damn.

SAM: Maybe because there's no heart to grab.

MARISHA: Yeah, I know better than anyone.

MATT: It's going to attempt to shift back. You do get attack of opportunity on it.

MARISHA: Ooh, pop.

MATT: Go for it.

MARISHA: 24.

MATT: 24 hits. Go ahead and roll damage.

MARISHA: And Sentinel, he is not moving.

MATT: Correct, so he does not-- he is not able to merge with the terrain.

MARISHA: 11 damage.

LIAM: Oh, nice.

MATT: All righty.

MARISHA: And-- nope. You go.

MATT: Okay, that finishes his go. So now, as two of your allies have been possessed, the two other ghostly creatures, still wandering through the mists, haunting around you. The shadow creature trading blows with Beauregard, its eyes now burning red with anger. It is Jester's turn.

LAURA: I'm going to look at Yasha. Then I'm going to hold up my symbol of the Traveler and say: Oh, help me right now. And then I'm going to cast Turn Undead.

MATT: Okay. And at this level, what does that do?

LAURA: Uh, Destroy Undead--

MATT: At what CR challenge rating?

LAURA: Destroy Undead is level two or lower destroys.

MATT: Okay, does not destroy. So that's wisdom saves?

LAURA: Yes.

MATT: You got it. So, for Yasha that is a fail. Caduceus, that is a fail.

LAURA: Oh, good.

MATT: The one next to Beauregard is a fail. The one that is currently next to Fjord is a fail.

SAM: Does that mean they all die?

LAURA: No, that means they have to flee.

LIAM: Flee from Jester.

MARISHA: Okay, okay, okay.

MATT: So you watch as-- I mean, it's not their turn yet. But immediately, the two that had taken possession of your friends are--

SAM: Oh wow, that's great.

MATT: -- shunted out of the bodies of your allies and now-- you see them now reeling as Jester stands there, clutching her symbol. You've seen the burst of divine resonant, Wild Mother energy radiate from Caduceus on a few occasions like this. For Jester, it's unique. You, for a brief second, watch as if these faint shadows of a green cloaked figure, appear next to the ghosts and tap them on their shoulders and go, "Boo!" And all the ghosts go (shriek) and begin to flee or preparing themselves to run from Jester, who now you can see this shimmering green cloak around her as well, like she herself is within this spectral image of the Traveler himself.

LAURA: I got goosebumps.

MATT: That's your action. You still have your movement and bonus, if you'd like.

ASHLEY: That's so cool.

LAURA: Okay. Two got hurt. I guess for my bonus action-- is anybody hurt?

TALIESIN: Beau.

MARISHA: Yeah.

LAURA: Beau?

MARISHA: I'm okay, though, but I'll take it.

LAURA: I don't know if I have it prepared.

SAM: I mean, I shot myself in the face.

LAURA: Hold on, hold on. Oh, I do. Hmm, it's not that much, but I'm going to cast a Healing Word at Beau.

MARISHA: Fuck yes.

LAURA: So that's a 1d4, sorry.

MARISHA: Nope, I'll take it.

LAURA: Oh, that's four plus five, so nine points.

MARISHA: Yes. Yep.

LAURA: Yeah.

MARISHA: Dope.

MATT: All righty. So that finishes your turn, Jester? Are you going to stay put or are you going to move?

LAURA: I'm going to stay where I am.

MATT: All right, finishing Jester's go. That brings us to Fjord. Caleb, you're on deck.

TRAVIS: Yeah, I'm going to summon the sword and ignite it.

MATT: All right.

TRAVIS: And I'm going to take two swipes against the ghostly shit fuck that's right behind me.

MATT: All righty.

TRAVIS: That's a 20-- 30 to hit.

MATT: That hits!

TRAVIS: Okay, and second one. Is also a 30 to hit, both a 19.

MATT: Damn.

TRAVIS: Which is crazy.

LAURA: Yeah, did the main one have to make a save against me? The big shadow guy.

MATT: The big one is-- no, it is within radius. So yeah, he will make one as well. He-- does an 18...?

LAURA: He succeeded.

MATT: He does it.

TRAVIS: 17... 26 plus... 28, 30. 30 total points of slashing damage.

MATT: Very nice. The blade-- as the blade lights up and you strike twice against it, you watch as it carves through parts of its spectral form. It shivers and shakes and shrieks, as it begins to pull away. I believe it does get to make a save against your--

LAURA: Turn Undead? It does?

MATT: I think when it--

LAURA: If it gets damage?

MATT: If it takes damage.

TALIESIN: Yeah, when it takes damage.

MATT: It succeeds. So that one is no longer fleeing right there.

TRAVIS: Shit.

LAURA: That's okay.

MATT: But it is wounded.

TRAVIS: Did we call that out and I just wasn't listening? Okay.

TALIESIN: That's just how Turn Undead works.

TRAVIS: Got it. With my bonus action, can I cast Hexblade's Curse on the shadow creature?

MATT: Yes, you may.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Now you watch... normally you're used to seeing the curse apparate through nearby shadow. This creature is made of pure shadow. And instead you see these faint, glowing, green-like tendrils that form into vines, but still very dark and oil-slicked vines that begin to tear up and wrap around it. And as that-- that is essentially the apparition of your Hexblade's Curse. The Wild Mother now focusing your attention and the blessing of your weapon upon that entity. Does that finish your go?

TRAVIS: It does.

MATT: All right. Caleb, you're up.

LIAM: Yeah. So we've had a lot of experience with people being possessed or taken over. And I don't know the nature of these things, but rather than letting them take over me and really hurting somebody, I'm just going to unload Disintegrate now into the creature in front of Beauregard. So lodestone comes out, dust flies through the air, and here come all the d6s.

MATT: So it's a dexterity saving throw?

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: Okay. Wow, that is a 21.

LIAM: 24, (counting) 40. 80 total, so 40--

MATT: So 40 points of--

TRAVIS: Jesus.

SAM: 80?

TRAVIS: Eight-zero?

LAURA: Oh, that's amazing.

MATT: So as you aim your ray, it strikes it and you can see where the green tethers that wrap around it for the Hexblade's Curse, the impact causes the shadow to turn gray and ashy. Parts of its body almost seem to become physical and then crumble away as it (gasping moan) recoils in severe pain. That's a pretty heavy hit on it.

LIAM: Yeah. And then I will use my movement to go crawl up on the stones diagonally from Caleb.

MATT: Over here?

LIAM: Yeah, up onto the rock even.

MATT: There you go.

LIAM: And cower.

MATT: Okay. Cowering done. All right. At this point, you still hear the voices encircling the space, saying things like, "Left here. Hungry. Never returning. Taken." Beau, it's your turn.

MARISHA: Okay.

LAURA: These pour souls.

MARISHA: Yeah, real sorry, man. Pop pop. (laughter) I feel-- we're so mad.

SAM: Di-Beau-macy. (laughter)

MARISHA: That's good, that's good. Pop pop.

TRAVIS: Good good, pop pop.

MARISHA: Yeah, that's good. 16 and 21.

MATT: The 21 hits.

MARISHA: Okay, okay, okay, okay.

LIAM: By the end of the campaign, Marisha only says pop.

MARISHA, LIAM, TRAVIS, and MATT: Pop pop! Pop pop!

SAM: It means, like, it's Smurf. You know, it means whatever you want to.

MARISHA: Snarf snarf snarf.

MARISHA: 18-- or sorry, sorry. Eight, eight damage.

MATT: Eight points of damage, all righty.

MARISHA: A Stunning Strike.

MATT: All righty. That's cocked.

MATT: 21.

TRAVIS: Damn.

MATT: This guy's rolling really high on these saves. Natural 18 on that one.

LIAM: Look at the smile on that--

TRAVIS: Look at these ki points.

MATT: Yeah! (laughter)

MATT: I'm so used to Stunning Strike wrecking my guys. And it's like, when they roll high, I'm like, yeah, that's right. You show that monk.

LAURA: Don't let her get away with this.

MATT: That's your first hit.

MARISHA: Patient Defense-- huh?

MATT: Patient Defense?

MARISHA: Yep.

MATT: Okay, you got it. All right. You go into a defensive stance. That ends your go. Veth, you're up.

SAM: Redo. Going to cast Brenatto's Voltaic Bolt.

LAURA: You can do it!

ASHLEY: Let's do it, let's do it! Come on.

SAM: Rev up my old--

LAURA: Oh my god, if you do this again.

SAM: Going to run over towards that post over there and slide and fire. As I disappear behind it at the big boss.

MATT: You got it.

SAM: (groans)

MARISHA: Oh no!

SAM: 16?

MATT: 16 just misses it. (groaning)

TRAVIS: Just missed it.

LAURA: It was the slide that did it.

SAM: Goddamn it!

MATT: Sorry, buddy.

SAM: It's all good. That's all I got.

LAURA: You don't get a bonus attack?

SAM: The bonus is charging it up.

LAURA: Oh.

MATT: Yeah, all right that finishes Veth's go.

LIAM: You have to rub it really fast with fur to give it a static charge. (laughter)

SAM: I could carry a balloon around.

MATT: None of the ghosts recharge their possession ability.

TRAVIS: Oh, that's good.

TALIESIN: They'd have to run anyway.

MATT: I know, but, but there's a chance that they recharge it.

LAURA: Oh, okay.

MATT: It's going to flee, 40 feet, and hover up to here.

ASHLEY: Damn it.

MATT: Over to this direction.

LAURA: You wanted to hit it?

MATT: You do get attack opportunity against them.

LAURA: No, but don't hit it, don't hit it.

ASHLEY: Don't hit it.

LIAM: That's the one that Fjord already tagged isn't it?

TRAVIS: The one he's got in his hand now.

SAM: How are you going to tell Yasha not to hit something? That's all she does.

ASHLEY: I know.

MATT: And this one does flee over to here.

LAURA: Oh good. See, there's one still there.

MATT: The one that's right there is going to use its... Okay. So the ghost is next to you. After you strike it, it turns back to you and you see this, like, this younger warrior female in spectral form. This, like, thick hooked armor look at you and-- (roars) The body shifts into this terrifying demonic scream. Its whole body stretches in this nightmarish scenario.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Yeah, straight up, straight up. All right I need everybody--

LAURA: Oh no.

MATT: -- to make a wisdom saving throw, please.

MARISHA: Wis save? Oh boy.

SAM: Everybody?

MATT: Yes, everyone within 60 feet.

SAM: 60 feet?

MATT: Which is everybody.

LIAM: Oh, no! Low roll.

LAURA: Oh, yeah.

TRAVIS: 17.

MATT: Except for maybe Veth, who's hiding behind that and doesn't see it. So you're fine. You're fine, Veth, you don't--

SAM: Okay, so my seven won't come into play?

MATT: Correct. Because of your placement, when you would not be able to see this creature.

SAM: Awesome.

TRAVIS: 17.

MATT: 17.

LAURA: 28.

MATT: 28.

LIAM: Seven.

MATT: A seven.

MATT: Yasha?

ASHLEY: Five.

LIAM: Wow.

TRAVIS: Fuck!

TALIESIN: 28, I don't know what happened.

MARISHA: 18.

SAM: What is wrong with you?

ASHLEY: I am rolling shitty.

SAM: But you always do.

ASHLEY: I know!

MATT: Most-- even as close as you are... You've seen some shit. And this isn't-- this isn't much. And most of you guys see this and it's scary, but you're confident. You have more pressing matters to get to, except for Caleb and Yasha. You are frightened for the next minute.

LIAM: See ya.

MARISHA: Fuck.

LIAM: I was already halfway there.

MARISHA: For one minute?

MATT: Yes.

LAURA: It doesn't mean you have to flee, right? Does that mean you have to flee or does that mean you just can't get closer?

MATT: You cannot get closer to it, actively. And while it's within your line of sight you have disadvantage on attacks, ability checks, stuff like that.

LIAM: On it, or on everything?

MATT: On anything. As long as it's within the line of sight, you're scared and you can't do things very well.

LAURA: If you turn your back to it-- If you turn your back, does that count?

MATT: No, within line of sight means that in theory, if you were to just turn, it's there. You know it's there. You have to get behind a wall or something and be-- (breathing heavily) Which really keeps ghosts from getting to you. That finishes their ghosts because they all fled. That brings us to Caduceus and Yasha so--

TALIESIN: All right.

TALIESIN: First thing I'm going to do just for-- for fun. Let's see how this works.

TRAVIS: Yasha, your sword's magic, right?

TALIESIN: I'm going to walk up behind, as far away from that creepy guy as possible. And I'm just going to tap Beau on the shoulder.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: And say: You've got this, you're fine. And I'm going to cast--

MARISHA: What?

TALIESIN: Where did it go? Holy Weapon. (cheering) So let's just add 2d8 radiant damage to everything you do.

MATT: There you go.

TRAVIS: "Everything you do."

TALIESIN: Now, I'm going to kind of back-- move me the rest of my movement towards the problem ghost.

MATT: That's about as close as you can get, there or there.

TALIESIN: I don't want to quite be in the group, so like a little--

MATT: About there?

TALIESIN: Yeah, that's good.

MATT: Okay, fair enough. Is that your go? That's you action, that's your movement.

TALIESIN: Yeah, I'm just really quickly looking at other options.

MATT: I don't know if you have much, you can't cast another spell as a bonus.

TALIESIN: No, the only thing I can really-- yeah, the only other thing I'm saving later.

MATT: Yasha, you're up.

ASHLEY: Okay, I would like--

MATT: You are scared.

ASHLEY: -- to rage.

MATT: All right, you rage.

SAM: I would like to rage.

TALIESIN: Actually, hold on. Oh, wait, wait, sorry. I'm so sorry, one second.

TRAVIS: Which makes the fear go away?

MATT: That's a berserker barbarian thing.

LAURA: Oh.

TALIESIN: Can I-- if that was a bonus action. I think Holy Weapon is a bonus action.

MATT: Is Holy Weapon a bonus action?

TALIESIN: Oh, shit. Oh, yep it's a bonus action. So can I still cast a cantrip?

MATT: You can, yeah.

TALIESIN: So I'm going to attack that ghost.

MATT: All right.

TALIESIN: With a Sacred Flame.

MATT: Sacred Flame, is that dexterity?

TALIESIN: It's dexterity.

LAURA: I'm going to attack that ghost.

MATT: That is a fail with an eight.

TALIESIN: So let's find--

LAURA: You do a lot of damage with your cantrips, too.

TALIESIN: Yeah, yeah, I'm-- this is going to hurt him.

ASHLEY: "This is going to hurt him."

TALIESIN: That's, uh... 22 radiant damage.

MATT: 22 radiant damage.

TALIESIN: Fuck off.

MATT: You blast it at the ghost. You can see now it's flickering in and out. It's on the cusp of dis-- just completely vanishing from this realm and any realm beyond.

TALIESIN: Scoot, scoot.

MATT: (laughs)

TALIESIN: Ghosts.

MARISHA: Like you're getting possums off the front porch.

MATT: Yasha, you're up.

ASHLEY: Okay, I'm going to attack it.

SAM: Attack what?

ASHLEY: Oh, you piece of shit. It was on such a good one and then it--

MATT: Well, you cannot attack it because it is not next to you and you cannot move closer to it.

LAURA: You can go attack the shadow guy.

ASHLEY: Because I'm scared of this one.

MATT: Yes, you're scared of the ghost in front of you, correct.

ASHLEY: I'm going to run away from it, then. I'm going to go to attack the other one. But since I already rolled--

MATT: Okay, so you move up this way?

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MATT: So you run, dodging behind them. Get your blade ready. It's still an eye line. So you do have a disadvantage on your attacks.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: But you know, if you're going to take your oh, you already rolled so.

ASHLEY: Wasn't any better.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: Do you have a way to get rid of your fear?

LIAM: I can't hear you.

TRAVIS: Do you have a way to get rid--

ASHLEY: I rolled that for disadvantage. It's already rolled once, but I'll take the first one, which was 13.

MATT: 13 is a miss.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: Don't forget you have reckless attacks. That's a big barbarian thing too. I know it's been awhile.

ASHLEY: So if I have disadvantage then that'll just give me--

MATT: It will give you a single attack, yeah, but it's too late now. But just for future reference.

ASHLEY: Okay, second attack.

MATT: Okay.

ASHLEY: Okay, disadvantage still?

MATT: Yes.

ASHLEY: Okay. 18?

MATT: 18 does hit. (cheering)

SAM: ? Every little thing she kills with magic ?

ASHLEY: That's not true.

MARISHA: ? Everything she kills just turns me on ?

LAURA: That-- that--

ASHLEY: That might be true. Okay, I'm going to try Savage Attacker. See if I get something better. That's the same. Okay. Okay, 15 total.

MATT: 15 damage, all righty. As you swing by and strike, the first swing goes wide. It turns back, the skull spinning around. You can see the red trail left behind briefly as it spins its head in your direction, it fades behind it. There's a slight drag behind the movement of its piercing, coal-like, red, angry eyes. And with that you take a second strike reeling back and it does manage to find its way into the middle of this spectral wraith-like creature. And as it cuts through (shrieking) It shrieks, you can see once again, this is now starting to look very hurt. This is-- this is turning, quite quickly. That finishes your go, Yasha.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MATT: It's now this entity's turn. It's going to go ahead and take a swing at you, Beauregard, because you have now glowing holy fists and that scares the fuck out of it.

MARISHA: Bring it bitch.

MATT: All right, you did take your Patient Defense, right?

MARISHA: Yes, I did.

MATT: Oh, that would be a 14.

MARISHA: A-miss.

MATT: With the sword, it swings towards you. You just-- dodge out of the way. And it's going now for its necrotic hand. It's spinning up with that dark energy and it's going to push towards your chest. With disadvantage... that's a 16.

MARISHA: Miss.

MATT: So you just-- duck out of the way. This creature's hurt and it's swinging wildly at you and it just cannot find its mark on you.

MARISHA: Can I use my... No, I haven't hit with Flurry of Blows. I can't use my Preternatural Counter, can I?

MATT: Correct, you cannot.

MARISHA: Never mind, okay. Miss.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: Miss, miss.

MATT: All right. That finishes its turn. It is now Jester. Fjord, you're up on deck.

TALIESIN: I love that you're doing the Last Dragon right now.

LAURA: Okay, I'm going to assume that Beau can handle the big guy. I'm going to turn around and I'm going to cast a 1st-level Guiding Bolt at the spirit behind Fjord so it doesn't possess him.

MATT: You've got it.

TRAVIS: (surprised) Oh.

LAURA: So that is--

TRAVIS: That's a thing.

LAURA: 22.

MATT: That hits.

LAURA: Okay.

ASHLEY: I can take care of the big guy, too.

LAURA: You could, but Beau's going to go before you. So that's why I just figured--

SAM: Sure you can.

ASHLEY: Kill it.

MARISHA: But you're here, too.

ASHLEY: I'm here for moral support.

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah.

LAURA: 16 points.

MARISHA: Yasha, Yasha, watch me.

LAURA: Of radiant damage.

MARISHA: Ya-- Yasha, are you watching?

ASHLEY: I'm watching.

MATT: With that, you blast that ghost with radiant spearing energy. It hits it, screams, and then just vanishes into the mist.

TRAVIS: Oh.

LAURA: Be free.

MATT: As it's destroyed, the central wraith figure just screams out in anger. Those near it, you can see the eyes burn now twice as bright. It's now giving off red light from the front of its face. It is furious at the destruction of one of its allies.

LAURA: Oops.

MATT: And it seems like the shadows around it grow darker and it grows a little larger in anger.

MARISHA: Good to know.

SAM: Like it got more powerful?

LAURA: Probably, yeah.

MATT: So Jester, it's still your turn.

LAURA: Okay. For my bonus action... I'm going to... turn around back to... Beau, and I'm going to give her another Healing Word and say: Get better, Beau!

MARISHA: Thanks, Jes.

MATT: There you go. Staying put?

SAM: (as Jester) Get good.

LAURA: Get good! Yeah, that's seven more points.

MARISHA: Fuck yes.

MATT: Are you staying put or are you...?

LAURA: Yes, sir.

MATT: All right that finishes Jester's go. Fjord, you're up. Caleb, you're on deck.

TRAVIS: I'm going to use my-- make sure I say it right-- my Relentless Hex to magically teleport up to 30 feet next to my Hexblade's Curse. So I'm going to appear behind him.

MATT: Out of the shadows and the green tendrils that you left there, you watch as this giant angry wraith creature with this blackened rune blade in one hand and its swirling necrotic energy that is currently shouting in anger Fjord just-- emerges behind it.

TRAVIS: Do I have advantage on this because they're-- my peoples are flanking him?

MATT: Technically none of you are-- are flanking. Flanking is directly across.

LIAM: Those squares, man.

LAURA: You could have bamfed directly behind him.

MATT: You could move here.

TRAVIS: I'll do it so I can do that.

MATT: You got it.

TRAVIS: And I will take two swings with the Star Razor.

MATT: Go for it.

TRAVIS: With advantage.

LIAM: I like spooky Fjord.

LAURA: Spooky Fjord is cool.

LIAM: Yeah.

TRAVIS: That's a 21-- 22 to hit.

MATT: That hits.

TRAVIS: Okay.

TALIESIN: Man, do I have some shit I can do.

TRAVIS: And I will dump a 5th-level Divine Smite.

SAM: Ooh.

MATT: Roll some damage on that.

SAM: That sounds brutal.

TALIESIN: I can burn--

LIAM: Let's do it.

MARISHA: The divine-- divine spikes or whatever, what are they called, that he just said?

TRAVIS: 30, 32. And then Divine Smite is how many?

TALIESIN: 4d8 radiant.

MARISHA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: What is divine-- how many-- how many divine-- is Divine Smite?

LIAM: Oh boy.

SAM: 5d8.

MATT: I forgot to roll for Viya's initiative, my bad.

LAURA: Whoops. Vilya's just standing there like, "Wow, this fucking sucks."

MATT: Well, you know what? We'll get to that. We'll get to that.

TRAVIS: Yeah, 5d8.

LAURA: Whoa, it is 5d8? Holy moly.

TALIESIN: Sweet Christmas.

MATT: It is undead.

LIAM: So an extra d8?

LAURA: Or he's just gets double damage?

MATT: No, no, no. There isn't actually do additional damage.

TRAVIS: 22, 27.

MATT: It's 6d8 because it is undead.

TRAVIS: Oh!

MATT: Undead and fiends get an additional d8.

TRAVIS: Nine-- I mean, uh-- that's a six. (laughter)

LAURA: Nine-- it's an eight--

TRAVIS: It's a six.

LAURA: It's a six.

TRAVIS: That is 65 points of damage.

TALIESIN: Oh my god!

MATT: How do you want to do this? (cheering)

TRAVIS: I'll pop up opposite of my ladies and be like: Let's wreck this. (whooshing)

MATT: As the blade strikes down, you watch as the fog separates and a single beam of sunlight seems to carve through from the open sky. As the Wild Mother's wrath comes through, channeled into your blade, and as it carves into this being of shadow, it doesn't even have a chance to screech. You watch as the shadow folds, curls inward, and then (poof) is gone. There left in the ground, there is a slight crater, as you hear the crackling impact sound of stone that was cast to the side. And a little series of red, coal-burning lights, where the eyes once were in the creature just slowly streaks smoke and vanish.

TRAVIS: Tricep flex.

MATT: All the other ghosts immediately flee.

LAURA: Whoa.

MARISHA: Yasha, were you watching?

ASHLEY: I saw all of it. You guys were all amazing. It was so great.

MARISHA: Yeah.

ASHLEY: Remember that time that I got possessed yet again?

MARISHA: Are you okay?

ASHLEY: Eh.

TALIESIN: (laughs)

LAURA: We got to work on your, like, wisdom saves. We got to figure out the way to make your brain-- maybe I could make you, like, a tinfoil hat.

ASHLEY: Like a-- yeah.

TRAVIS: Can I use Divine Sense to see within 60 feet, if there are any more celestial, fiends, or undead around us?

MATT: Sure. And as you do that, you concentrate and focus and there are none. The whispers have ceased. Looks like some of the local-- the mist remains, but it looks like some of the fog in the vicinity begins to slightly dissipate.

LAURA: Did we kill the bad guy in this area?

TALIESIN: Why don't we check out what's in that tower?

LIAM: Yeah, as soon as it seems like the danger is past, eyes on the obelisk.

SAM: I found it! I found it. There was a pebble in my crossbow. It was making it shoot crazy.

TRAVIS: Is that what it was?

SAM: It was a pebble. I took it out. Should be fine now. Sorry about that, everybody.

LAURA: It's okay, Nott. Veth, I'm sorry.

SAM: No, it's fine.

LIAM: You have a lot of ash and dirt on your tush and your butt side from--

SAM: Yeah, I was sitting there trying to fix it.

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: All right, so--

TALIESIN: You're going to glow for an hour.

MARISHA: Oh, this lasts for an hour?

TALIESIN: Yep.

MARISHA: Oh, hell yeah.

LAURA: Let's-- yeah, it will light the tower.

MATT: Okay, you can see Vilya looks a bit shaken by this and goes, "You're certainly capable. You're not wrong."

LAURA: Vilya? Did you just not want to fight with us?

MATT: "I was going to try and talk to them."

LAURA: Oh.

MATT: "But that option went away quickly. When you killed them."

TRAVIS: Dis-dispatched them.

MATT: "Dispatched."

TRAVIS: Gave them an opportunity to return.

LAURA: Yeah, they could maybe be back on the plane maybe.

TRAVIS: They kind of were already dead.

SAM: She's not wrong, though. We could have learned more about how they got here or what they wanted from this place.

LIAM: Well, maybe we still will.

MARISHA: I mean, it kind of feels like it's clear where they came from and what they wanted, though, right?

TRAVIS: They did say--

MARISHA: What would you have said?

MATT: "I would have asked if they had reason to perhaps join our side or..."

MARISHA: That's more or less what I said when I said "Fuck Vokodo," am I right?

LAURA: Next time say "Fuck Vokodo" before you punch them in the face.

MARISHA: Well, it was, you know--

TRAVIS: What if they couldn't leave this area? What if this was, like, part of their realm and this was as far as their reach would go?

MATT: "That's very possible."

LAURA: That's true.

TRAVIS: We just don't know.

LAURA: That's true.

TRAVIS: Because you punched it in the face.

MATT: "Well--

TRAVIS: Just kidding.

MATT: "-- to be fair, none of you really stopped either."

LAURA: Yeah, well, at that point he was already attacking Beau. I can't defend somebody that's attacking--

SAM: I was firing warning shots, to--

LAURA: Directly into your own face.

SAM: -- to shoot-- to show them that we could attack them.

MATT: Make a deception check.

SAM: Ooh, 17 minus two so 15.

MATT: 15. Vilya looks at you and goes, "Uh huh."

MARISHA: Into your face.

LIAM: Caleb is already ascending those stairs and casting Detect Magic during that squabble.

TRAVIS: Nice.

MATT: Okay. As you begin to make your way up to an entrance to this one sliver, this fragment of tower, this strange open portion. You don't detect any magic, but you begin to see writing on the inside of the walls. A language that you don't necessarily understand.

LIAM: Well, I know Celestial and Sylvan, but I pull out my book because I don't understand it. And I turn to the page for Comprehend Languages and I begin the process of casting that.

MATT: Okay, and that will take you 10 minutes?

LIAM: Ten minutes, yeah.

MATT: What are the rest of you doing while Caleb's doing that?

SAM: Searching the tower.

LAURA: All of it?

TRAVIS: Well, yeah.

TALIESIN: Let's take a look at least at the ground floor. So you see if it's safe.

LAURA: How tall-- how many floors up does it seem to go?

MATT: Before it carves off? It looks like seven.

SAM: Whoa.

TRAVIS: Also stairs are probably missing.

MATT: There is that.

TRAVIS: But we can see how far we can go?

TALIESIN: Let's take a look.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

LAURA: Beau can climb up the side of it.

MARISHA: That's kind of what I was thinking, too.

TRAVIS: Well, get after it, Miles Morales.

MARISHA: Yeah, race you to the top. I'll go to the outside and see how far I can get.

TRAVIS: That's not a fair race. No one else can do that.

MARISHA: Climbing-- it's fair to me, woo!

MATT: Okay, so as you sit down and begin studying, they begin stepping around you, Caleb, and making their way into the interior of the tower. Beauregard begins parkouring up the side. As you come around the edge, Beauregard, you can see the portion of the tower that was facing you and somewhat this side is the outer wall. Once you come around the edge, it is open. It is just-- the portions of floor that remain just coming to an end with loose bricks, dangling off the edge. Once again, it looks like it was just carved out and it's like a slice of cake.

MARISHA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Too topical.

MATT: Fair enough. Everything's cake.

LIAM: Everything's cake.

MATT: That will be an old meme by the time this comes out. (laughter) So from best you can tell, it's much taller than it is thick. And as far as interior substance of it, the architecture is gorgeous, if ominous. And once again, calling back to the Ruins on the outside of Rosohna, some of the larger ruined what looked like citadels from the Calamity days of Xhorhas. Reminiscent in structure and design to that. A lot of angular pointed and jagged archways over doors and passages. The stairs themselves seem to be a very finely hewn stone with older now mold-soaked velvets and ceremonial materials placed on walls as tapestries and such that have just rotted over time. Everything here is of black stone and obsidian, to elements of darkened iron that have now rusted over and added a brown and red tint to where certain areas in certain elements of the structure are joined together by the metal. As you ascend, you see the main chamber, the base chamber which is the largest part. And just the corner of it, because as soon as you step up past Caleb through the staircase that leads into that area, there's light. There is no back wall. It just opens up into the rest of the surrounding area of the Ruin. And there are no other structures beyond this tower. Everything that you walked by, whatever portion of a city or a village that you walked through, it looks like that ended along with the line of whatever ended this tower.

SAM: And down on the ground. Is there a-- is there a rift? Is there a line? Is there a glowing?

MATT: No rift. It's just like someone took a portion of a ruined village and a corner of a tower somewhere and just shunted it here.

TRAVIS: And it is more of a tower than like a stair-stepping pyramid structure?

MATT: Correct. It is a tower. There's just some layers as far as it gets, you know, thinner towards the top. But the floor that is here, you can see it being very well-crafted. The stonework is beautiful. And you do see a handful of stone sarcophagi.

SAM: On the ground floor?

MATT: On the ground floor, you see two present here.

TRAVIS: Do we want to check out the graves?

LAURA: Check out for traps.

TRAVIS: I'll hop down there, too.

SAM: Okay, I'll go check for traps.

LAURA: I heard it's dangerous to open random sarcophagi.

SAM: You heard that?

LAURA: Somewhere.

TALIESIN: That's weird.

TRAVIS: In a song or something?

ASHLEY: Is there anything written on-- I'd love to.

MATT: There is. Also in Infernal.

LAURA: Oh! I can read that.

MATT: Okay. So as you approach one of the two-- and they're both, like, fairly well-made, though the detail doesn't change the two of them. They're fairly similar in shape, design. They both say "Retainers to the Lord." And there are-- what looked to be where names would be placed, there are no names there. Like they are left nameless. But just given the title of Retainers to the Lord.

LAURA: Retainers to the Lord, like Oracs?

SAM: You mean like-- like teeth retainers? Like, is this where he keeps his...

TRAVIS: No, no.

ASHLEY: Are there's symbols anywhere?

MATT: Make a perception check.

LAURA: So this is-- these are-- this is from Hell?

SAM: If this is from Hell--

ASHLEY: 22.

SAM: They don't bury their dead. They're in dead land. Like, why would they bury or entomb--

TRAVIS: Retainers?

LAURA: What does that mean?

LAURA: Beau, you're smart. Caleb, you're smart.

SAM: Retainers could be helpers of the lord, right?

TALIESIN: Yeah.

LIAM: Like a servant or another thing.

TALIESIN: Perhaps these are retainer containers.

TRAVIS: Or something that you put away to be used later.

MATT: Yasha, what'd you roll?

ASHLEY: 22.

MATT: 22, nice. You see symbols across the top of each of these stone tablets, as well as the archway on the inside. Like once you walk past and enter this base floor, looking back over the archway, there's a similar symbol. And it is a long dark blade. You can see with a couple of runes around the base of it. Very similar to the one that was being wielded by the shadow spectral creature that you defeated outside.

MATT: Beauregard.

MARISHA: Is he a retainer? Yeah.

MATT: You've climbed up to look onto the second floor. And loosely over one of these, and hanging off the edge, not quite falling, but it's on that teetering edge of the stone that's just starting to fall and crumble, you see a very large, very gorgeous, adorned, black metal sarcophagus.

MARISHA: On the second floor?

MATT: On the second floor.

TRAVIS: So three total sarcophagi?

MARISHA: Two on the bottom floor and the larger more orate one on the second.

MATT: Mm-hmm.

SAM: I wonder if we--

LAURA: And it doesn't look disturbed at all? It's, like, perfectly closed?

MATT: From what you can see, yeah. It's just slightly tilted because the floor that it rests upon is broken off at that same angle. And it looks like, over time, it's starting to bow and whether through general weathering or other elements, it's starting to crumble a bit.

SAM: Are there any more up higher?

MARISHA: That's what I'm going to look for. I'm going to keep going.

MATT: Okay. You climb up the two more floors above. You see two more identical sarcophaguses to the ones in the bottom floor that are loosely overlapping, where the large one is, but those are the last you see. The two floors above, they're too small. Similar design, but the floor space gets smaller with each one as the pointed sliver of it comes to its apex. And it just looks like you're catching the edges of rooms, uncertain of what may have been within the larger structure. And once again, this would be the corner of a much larger tower. So this is just a small section of a massive structure, wherever it may have come from.

LIAM: It seems to match up to the numbers on the ground.

MARISHA: Yeah, exactly.

TRAVIS: Yeah, a retainer is normally used at some point later.

MARISHA: So one big one and four ghost tiny ones.

LIAM: Yeah.

TRAVIS: We're definitely opening them, yes?

MARISHA: I mean, yeah.

SAM: We should open it up one of the smaller ones first in case they're--

TRAVIS: I think so. After checking for traps.

SAM: Sure, sure, sure.

MARISHA: I'm back down to the ground floor with them and relay what I saw.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: Have my 10 minutes gone by, at this point?

MATT: At this point, I'd say yeah.

LIAM: Okay. What am I looking at on the outside of the building?

MATT: You see statements that essentially equate to: "The one of 12 here to guard for all of time." That's primarily what you get across from just the entryway.

LIAM: Okay.

LAURA: 12. So whatever this--

LIAM: Does that jostle anything in his noodle from reading over?

MATT: Make a history check.

TRAVIS: 25 or higher.

LIAM: 27.

MARISHA: Oh my god.

MATT: No.

LAURA: Oh, wow.

LIAM: Deep shit.

SAM: Ancient knowledge.

ASHLEY: Wait, did you ask what language it is?

LIAM: It's probably Infernal.

MATT: It's Infernal.

LIAM: It's cool how Jester walked by, could totally read it, and Caleb's like-- (laughter)

LAURA: Oh, did you want to read that?

LIAM: Yeah.

LAURA: Sorry.

SAM: Shall we check one for traps? One of the smallies?

TALIESIN: We've got Beau here.

SAM: All right I'll check one of the small--

TALIESIN: Because you're still glowing.

SAM: -- tombs for traps. They haven't been opened yet.

MATT: Not, from that you can tell.

SAM: Okay, I'll check one for traps. What am I doing? Investigation?

MATT: This would be investigation.

SAM: 21.

MATT: 21. Does not appear to be trapped.

LAURA: Does it appeared to be magic?

SAM: I can't tell that.

TRAVIS: Maybe we wait for the wizard to get in here.

MATT: Caleb has now joined the rest of you as you've slowly made your way through looking for any other inscription.

LIAM: And I heard Fjord say that and I will instantly cast Detect Magic.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: Re-up it.

MATT: Nothing magical catches your attention from either of these sarcophagi.

SAM: All right, let's try to open it.

TRAVIS: Who's going to be the one to push it open?

LAURA: I mean--

SAM: My Mage Hand can only do, like, five pounds so.

ASHLEY: I'll push it open.

LIAM: And we're doing one of the basic ones, right?

LAURA: Yeah.

LAURA: I'll hold my hand out, get ready to heal Yasha if, whatever. Yeah, yeah.

TALIESIN: You're good.

ASHLEY: Push it open.

MATT: Okay, you push it open. (sliding) Immediately this smell of very, very old dusty decay gets to your nose, but it is been-- it's just brief. Because whatever has been sealed in here has been finished rotting for a very long time. You look down and as the scent passes, you can see the skeletal remains of a figure in robes and faint bits of armor that is just left there. This blackened metal armor. Long rotted.

LAURA: Does the armor look like the ghosts that we saw?

MATT: It looks pretty identical.

TRAVIS: Leather or metal?

MATT: Metal.

LAURA: We should open the big one. That was for the shadow creature.

MARISHA: Absolutely.

TRAVIS: Well, that armor is pretty cool, right?

MARISHA: You want to wear that nasty--

MATT: It's considered half plate.

TRAVIS: What is it?

MATT: Considered half plate.

TRAVIS: Half plate. I know what that means. (laughter)

TALIESIN: It's not magical armor or anything like that, right?

MATT: You don't get a magical essence from the armor. It has beautiful scrolling. It looks more ornamental or ceremonial than anything really meant to be brought into battle. It doesn't have any war scars on it or anything--

LAURA: Which makes sense.

MATT: These are designed for the burial and entombment of these corpses.

TALIESIN: One more small one or the big one?

LAURA: Big one.

LIAM: I just want to get within range of the big one before my spell.

MARISHA: Oh, we got to go up a floor.

MATT: There are no stairs that go to the second floor, by the way. Much like Fjord, any sort of entranceway to the upper floors apparently exist elsewhere in this larger structure that are not present. So you're going to have to climb.

LAURA: Well, you can give the rope to Beau, you can climb up, and then just toss it down so we can have the aid of a rope.

MATT: That's easy enough to do, it'll take you a little bit time. Vilya just walks over and takes a gust of wind, takes a leap and parkours off the wall and gets up to the second floor.

LAURA: She's cool.

TALIESIN: That's cool.

MATT: All right.

MARISHA: I'll take the rope, anchor it to a pillar nearby.

MATT: Vilya helps you situate it. Eventually, you guys all make it to the second floor and there, you can see the large sarcophagus at its odd, precarious angle.

SAM: Checking for traps.

MATT: All right.

SAM: 21.

MATT: 21, does not appear to be trapped.

LIAM: And is there any magical read on it from the last few minutes of my Detect Magic?

MATT: Um, no, there is not.

LIAM: Okay.

SAM: All right.

ASHLEY: I open this one, too?

SAM: Sure?

TALIESIN: Back up again in the corner.

TRAVIS: No weapons with these, right?

MARISHA: Guard.

TRAVIS: No weapons in the sarcophagi?

MATT: The ones that you saw below? Or the one that you opened? No.

LAURA: I bet there's one in this one. Come on, big weapon.

ASHLEY: Okay, I'm just going to one hand, put one hand on my blade and then one hand and try to push it open.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: Get myself-- oh no, I can't. I'm not going to do that, carry on.

MATT: Okay. Make a strength check for me.

ASHLEY: Okay.

LIAM: Come on, muscles.

LAURA: I'm going to guide her. You got this, Yasha.

ASHLEY: Okay. Natural 20.

TRAVIS: Oh. Get on it.

MATT: Okay. So you push the lid relatively easily, actually. It shifts back. As it does, the weight shifts on the sarcophagus and it begins to lift up on that side. With a natural 20, yes. You catch it, but you are locked in place. And the floor, like, you're now in the process where now you can't pull it back up, but you're keeping it from toppling. And this thing weighs a lot. So you can't move and you don't know how long you have.

LAURA: I'm going to go up and hold Yasha around the waist and pull back as well.

MATT: I need you to make a strength check with disadvantage. Because this is now two of you pulling back what equates to maybe close to a ton and a half of stone and metal.

ASHLEY: Do you want to just peek in and, peek in?

LIAM: I will pull out Cat's Ire and bring the hand down to the other side of the sarcophagus and push up.

MATT: Okay, well, hold on. It's going to take a second to cast that spell. You go ahead and roll your check.

ASHLEY: Shit.

LAURA: Disadvantage. Saving throw or just a check?

MATT: Just a check.

LAURA: A seven.

MATT: Seven, okay. You go to help her and Yasha as you're holding it, it goes. The whole sarcophagus peers off the edge, the stones crack and break. And you see it begin to tumble. You do create Cat's Ire. I need you to go ahead and just roll a straight dexterity check for me. This is to see if you can--

LIAM: Not great. That is a seven.

MATT: Cat's Ire paw appears as you rush towards the edge to make eye contact with the sarcophagus to try and catch it. And as the cat's paws swoops, it meets air as the sarcophagus slams into the ground, breaks into three pieces and dust fills the space around it.

SAM: We broke our loot.

LIAM: I walk over to the edge and the claw floats down and I just sort of (shifting).

MARISHA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Kitty litter.

LAURA: Anything?

MARISHA: Anything good?

MATT: Okay. It's about 20 feet below you.

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: You push apart some of the pieces. You look and see what is a ruined corpse in a black, burial shroud over very, very intricate looking metallic armor. It is busted. That's what you see.

LIAM: Okay. Good times, guys.

LAURA: Oops.

TRAVIS: Can we pull the busted looking armor out?

SAM: Yeah, let's go down there.

LAURA: Yeah, let's go down. We'll go down and look at it. Maybe we can flip over the sarcophagus and see if there's any-- I mean, the lid and see if there's any writing on the inside of it. Sometimes they have those things, right? In the story books.

MATT: All right, you guys make your way down there to it. The lid itself is broken in, like, six pieces. The sarcophagus fell 20 feet and then just hit hard floor and stone and busted. Make an investigation check for me.

SAM: Who? Jester, okay.

LAURA: 18.

MATT: 18, okay. Piecing some of it together, you do see on the top, a sculpture of what looked to be a knight of some kind in the same armor as the tattered corpse is adorned in. Wearing a small pointed crown on it. It doesn't look regal by any means, but it represents station and importance. Clutching blade to its chest that goes down to the length of its body. Similar design as to the symbols you saw on the other sarcophagi, as well as the entranceway there. And you see a name in Infernal that is carved across a chiseled ribbon that stretches across from one elbow to the other where it's holding the sword at the front. It says "Lord Cioro." C-I-O-R-O is what it would be, Cioro.

TRAVIS: C-I-R-O?

MATT: C-I-O-R-O. Cioro

LAURA: Cioro.

TRAVIS: C-I-O-R-O.

LAURA: Damn it.

SAM: So wait, he's just broken into a million pieces, right? This creature?

TRAVIS: The sarcophagus.

MATT: The sarcophagus is busted. And the corpse inside has been heavily damaged by the process of the sarcophagus being destroyed.

TRAVIS: What does the armor look like? Even though it's been probably dented and--

MATT: In similar ceremonial way to the other ones. It's the armor itself. It's full plate. It's a full, awesome suit of full plate. Really intricately carved with designs and runes. And you can see that the inside of it probably had a lot of old herbs and things that were placed around the corpse when it was buried, but all that's been also scattered and thrown askew in the space around it

LAURA: What about its blade? I feel like he would have been buried with his sword.

MATT: You do find the hilt and handle of a blade.

TRAVIS: Hilt and handle.

LAURA: Okay.

SAM: Did you guys check this for magic as well?

ASHLEY: Is his skull still intact and everything?

MATT: Nope. Skull is crushed.

SAM: Can it be put back together so we can talk to it?

TALIESIN: Once it's done, it's done.

TRAVIS: Can't mend a skull?

LAURA: I feel like we could have banished him, and he would have gone back to his home plane. I'm feeling really guilty right now.

TRAVIS: The corpse?

LAURA: The ghost. The shadow creature.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

LAURA: He probably would have been real happy.

TALIESIN: You're still sad about that tree, aren't you?

TRAVIS: Do we want to-- did we look at it? See if the hilt and handle is magical?

TALIESIN: I'm a big believer in always--

LIAM: I didn't get a read on the outside of the sarcophagus.

TRAVIS: Oh, that's right it would have--

SAM: You scanned this one too?

MATT: Not magical.

LIAM: There's no lead or anything.

SAM: Okay.

TRAVIS: Can we grab it?

MATT: Make an arcana check.

TALIESIN: Oh, we're grabbing it.

LIAM: Nope. 12. I rolled a two.

MATT: Okay, yeah, you-- it just looks like a busted blade.

LAURA: I'm going to take it.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: Take a look at it in a little bit.

MATT: All right.

SAM: Are there any skulls or anything that we can talk to?

TALIESIN: I say we go open sarcophagus.

LAURA: Well, we're on the ground floor again, so might as well talk to the one we uncovered.

TALIESIN: Well, there's a third one too.

TRAVIS: The breastplate, like, I know there are runes and designs on it. Did it look like at one time it was capable of magic or more just ornate?

MATT: It's just ornate and ornamental.

TRAVIS: Okay. Dope-ass plate armor.

TALIESIN: Let's check box number three.

LIAM: Yeah, are we going to bother with every single one? Are we going to do our due diligence?

TALIESIN: And we'll take one of them with us.

LAURA: Sorry, Yasha.

ASHLEY: Well, that's-- I should have moved it in or something.

TRAVIS: Do we have room in the bag for this armor? I don't know, I just feel like if this was from somewhere else and it's decorative armor, if we could find someone talented enough to repair it, it might be worth something or a trade of interest to someone at some point.

LAURA: If you want to take it.

TRAVIS: Is that all right?

LAURA: I feel like--

SAM: I think it's fine. For some reason, I feel like the body itself is more important than the armor.

LAURA: Yeah, and it's destroyed.

TRAVIS: Caduceus?

LIAM: What does this tell us about the questions we have for our purpose here? It doesn't teach us anything new about Vokodo. This just seems like another slice of the multiverse.

MARISHA: Yeah, it just feels like it reaffirms what we already know.

LIAM: Yeah. Slice of onion.

SAM: We can ask him questions. He would be able to tell us where he's from, what happened, how he got here.

LIAM: Yeah, but this tower looks like it was just cut from whatever reality it was in.

MARISHA: I don't think it has anything to do with Vokodo. I mean, we can ask and we can learn and get more further confirmation.

TRAVIS: Let's do it, let's ask.

LAURA: You have Speak with Dead?

TALIESIN: I can tomorrow.

LAURA: I can tomorrow, might as well take a skull with us or something.

TALIESIN: Yeah, my thought.

LIAM: How late in the day is it now?

MATT: At this point it's mid-afternoon.

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: It'd be, like, three to four o'clock-ish, 3:30.

TRAVIS: Do we need to mend this crushed skull?

LAURA: I don't know if I can mend this. It seems like it's in a bunch of pieces, the skull, or is it just cracked?

MATT: Let me--"Repairs a single break or tear in an object."

LAURA: Yeah, I just didn't know if it was, like--

MATT: Yeah, no that skull is--

LAURA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Let's try one of the retainers.

MATT: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Let's open the other retainer box, that's what I say.

SAM: Sure.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

SAM: Well, we got the first one's already open, right?

TALIESIN: Let's check, no sense leaving one closed.

ASHLEY: And then there's two more on the third level?

MATT: Yeah. One and then one, yeah.

SAM: All right.

TALIESIN: Oh, maybe go to the top, then.

LAURA: Let's just do this one right here.

MARISHA: It's all the same, yeah.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

ASHLEY: I think he was the big boy.

LIAM: Did you just mime opening it up?

LAURA: Yeah.

LIAM: One's open.

MATT: So you opened the other sarcophagus right there?

LAURA: Yeah, the third one.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: Getting it done.

MATT: You push it open. And you see another similar corpse dressed in the same burial vestments as the other retainer.

MATT: Make a--

LAURA: Uh oh.

TRAVIS: No way.

MATT: Make a charisma saving throw.

LAURA: Of course the one that we don't check.

MARISHA: (laughs)

SAM: Wait, you just opened it?

MARISHA: And it's you again! (laughs)

TRAVIS: I'm sure it's fine.

SAM: What could go wrong?

TRAVIS: Maybe you'll just be scared.

MARISHA: Please, please make it.

LAURA: 16.

SAM: Oh, thank god.

MATT: 16, okay. As you lean in from the corpse that is there, the skeleton, you watch suddenly the ghostly visage-- one of the ghosts that was in the battle before emerges from the body and (gasps) reaches towards you and you push back. And it shrinks back into the corpse. You get the sense that the three ghosts that fled may have fled to their sarcophagus.

LAURA: Oh, they went to their home. Oh, so maybe we can send this one home?

SAM: Wait, why do we care about this one? It was a ghost that we punched in the face. Ask it questions.

TRAVIS: Yeah, yeah.

LAURA: Well, now I can't take its head. He's in it. Go take the other dead head.

MARISHA: Nice.

TALIESIN: I'm going to walk over to the box we just opened. We feel a little bad about that. I don't suppose you'd want to talk? I feel like that got off into the wrong foot.

MATT: No response.

TALIESIN: No.

LAURA: What if we could send you home?

MATT: No response.

TRAVIS: Yasha?

ASHLEY: No, I was just going to say what he said.

LIAM: Can we see the volcano peering up over the mist in the distance from here?

MATT: Right now, the fog that surrounds this space is still too thick to look beyond the horizon to see the mountain from where you are. You'd have to get some-- actually, if you climb up towards the tower, you might be able to have a vantage point to see. But from where you're standing now, you would not be able to.

MARISHA: You want me to go?

LIAM: Ja.

TRAVIS: And our history buffs don't know anything about the name?

LIAM: I can't get up there right now.

TRAVIS: Cioro or whatever.

MARISHA: Cioro? Yeah, do we do recognize...?

MATT: You can make a history check, if you want to.

MARISHA: Another history check?

SAM: It would have to be, like, a 50.

MARISHA: Come on, come on. Big money.

TRAVIS: Boom.

MARISHA: Yeah, 21?

MATT: Doesn't ring a bell.

MARISHA: I think that's weaker than his. All right, I'll climb--

SAM: We've wasted a day.

MARISHA: -- climb the tower, see if the volcano is still mad at us.

LIAM: You know what, I'll send from Frumpkin up with you.

MATT: Okay, you both head up.

LIAM: He'll land on your shoulder.

MATT: Okay, glancing over you can see the smoke is still billowing. Not more intense, not less intense, but consistent with the recent mild fury you seem to sense from the Vokodo entity that exists deep within.

LIAM: Is there anything we missed between here and there in the landscape that stands out?

MATT: Not that you're aware of at the moment. Not from where you stand.

TALIESIN: I'd like to see the rest of this village on our way out. Any of the other buildings.

TRAVIS: Oracs, Scario.

MARISHA: I don't know what else we can learn from any of this.

SAM: Circle up, huddle up, come on guys, share our brains here. Mind-meld, come on, what are we missing?

TRAVIS: Because right now Vokodo just sounds like he's actually warning us about dangerous areas. I mean, besides the thing that was hiding the ship. What would he not want someone to see here?

LAURA: I know, he's hiding something.

SAM: Why would he bring this piece here? Maybe he gets to choose.

LAURA: How close was that crack in the earth that we saw to the Ruins? Was it the whole other area?

MATT: Oh, it was quite far. It was a whole other area. And if you ask Vilya about that, she actually confirms that that crack is-- where is that here?

MARISHA: He doesn't necessarily have to be hiding anything.

MATT: "That's actually a part of the Winding Core."

LAURA: The Winding Core?

MATT: "That chasm runs from that northwestern side, underneath the mountain, and then peeks out on the southern, southeast side, which is where most of our mining is done."

SAM: Where's the Winding Core start? What entrance is she talking about?

MATT: The chasm that was seen earlier.

LAURA: We flew over a thing.

LIAM: Yeah, Beauregard and owl-Jester spotted a crack in the earth.

MARISHA: I mean, if I was like, you know, trying to pass as a god, I'd be like, yeah, I'm going to give you a cookie for this one and say don't go to where you might die. Because that's going to make me look like I'm an empathetic god.

MATT: "Vokodo seemed pretty emphatic about not coming here in the same way that he was saying to not go to--"

LAURA: Heaven's Falls.

TALIESIN: Is there anything below the tower?

MARISHA: Right, but you can be hiding something at Heaven's Fall, but then use "don't go here because it's dangerous at the Ruins"--

MATT: "That's true."

MARISHA: -- as a way to mask that you're hiding anything at all at one location.

SAM: Or there's evidence here to prove that he is not what he says he is.

LAURA: What if what he was fleeing from was whatever god these people were serving?

SAM: These people aren't from the Astral whatever, Sea.

TALIESIN: The Astral Sea is kind of-- I mean, everything's weird.

MARISHA: The Astral Sea's kind of like-- it's like the packing peanuts in between other planes.

LAURA: What if he'd gone into another plane and he pissed off something else?

LIAM: You pack things with peanuts?

LAURA: Maybe Vokodo had the ability to punch through the Astral Plane.

MARISHA: They're cheap.

TRAVIS: We should change our perspective. You and Frumpkin should go up to the top. See if it looks different from up there, down here.

MARISHA: I did. Didn't I?

LIAM: Yeah, that happened.

MATT: Yeah, you guys looked up.

TRAVIS: I'm paying attention.

MARISHA: He's still just mad.

TALIESIN: There's nothing below the ground floor of the tower. There's no doors on the bottom, there's no--

MATT: Make an investigation check.

SAM: If I were Vokodo on the run from something--

TALIESIN: Would anyone want to--

SAM: This thing was here, why would I not want anyone to go here?

TALIESIN: 12. Wait, nope. Yes, 12.

MATT: 12, okay. Don't really find anything. Passive investigation in Beauregard is very high. As part of this discussion and piecing things together, you begin to think. If a creature had punched through and dragged other pieces away from their homes, whatever was dragged along and misplaced would be very angry that it was misplaced. If something was very angry that it was misplaced, it would be prone to be an enemy of the thing that brought it here. Maybe Vokodo didn't want anyone to make friends with or allies with the spirits that were displaced.

SAM: We could have. Could have teamed up.

MATT: But--

SAM: We punched it in the face and then threw it off a balcony.

MATT: The leader has been destroyed. The lord vanquished, the spirit scattered.

MARISHA: It is not my fault.

SAM: No, it's not your fault.

MATT: No, no.

MARISHA: I punched it in the face.

MATT: It is not your fault.

MARISHA: It went (hisses) at me and, you know.

LIAM: Yeah, when you think about it--

ASHLEY: Normally that's scary.

MATT: There was very little attempt to speak with, beseech, and communicate with these creatures. And the path of wanton destruction was chosen instead.

TRAVIS: Wanton destruction.

MARISHA: That feels so blown out of proportion of what actually happened.

MATT: It's fine! No, I know. You gather with your investigation that perhaps an opportunity to make some allies here has passed.

TRAVIS: Cool, cool, cool.

SAM: It's okay. We gave it a shot.

TRAVIS: Where else are we not supposed to go on the island?

SAM: That's pretty much it.

MARISHA: Yeah, pretty much it.

ASHLEY: So that spire that we were seeing, that's the--

MATT: That's the tower you're at now, yeah.

SAM: Okay, we've checked off all the boxes. We know what we have to do now. We sleep. We feast. We kill Vokodo. No allies to help. We don't need 'em!

MARISHA: I tried to empathize with ghosts before.

TRAVIS: The only thing we haven't done is checked out the Winding Core.

MARISHA: I mean, it's just a mine, though. What are we going to get?

TRAVIS: Just a mine that we haven't checked out?

MATT: "It's not just a mine."

ASHLEY: Okay, wait, hold on.

MATT: "It is, in its own way a sliver, but with the Underdark."

TRAVIS: But pissed off things from the Underdark that might be mad that it got drug.

MARISHA: Is that true?

MATT: "We don't go that deep."

TRAVIS: But you also haven't been yourself for 25 years.

MATT: "That's true."

TALIESIN: Is it on the way?

SAM: But there are beings down there?

MATT: "There are all sorts of horrible things down there."

ASHLEY: What is it, Yasha?

TRAVIS: Maybe they're looking to get even.

ASHLEY: So this-- explain the-- how this looks-- it looks familiar to the architecture that was, like, around...

MATT: Around Rosohna.

ASHLEY: Like around in the Barbed Fields area?

MATT: South of the Barbed Fields. There's an area called the Ghostlands that surrounds Rosohna, which is where a bunch of ruins from the final battles of the Calamity remained. It's similar to those, though not quite.

ASHLEY: Like where all those shards were?

MATT: Yeah, like broken--

TRAVIS: Like spines, spires

MATT: Well, there's the Barbed Fields that are large pointed barbs. These are just-- it was just ruins and buildings from what was once the central city of the Betrayer Gods during the Calamity, that was then destroyed and left to ruin.

ASHLEY: Okay.

LIAM: It was an ice cream scoop of another dimension.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

TRAVIS: I mean, we don't need to go shopping in the place with all the terrible creatures.

LAURA: I think that the terrible creatures will be much harder to reason with than sentient beings here.

MATT: "I think you might be right."

LIAM: And the Underdark-- that's this plane. That's just a fissure into the birth. It's not like Vokodo has harmed whatever's down there, that we know of. It's not part of this.

SAM: You know what? Let's not be too down on Beau, all right? She's fine. But also, look.

MARISHA: I feel like no one said that until you did just now.

SAM: I'm just saying we shouldn't be--

TRAVIS: Drag her.

MARISHA: Right, so once again, bringing up a point that no one said.

SAM: Then we're all in agreement. Here's the point. Here's the point. The thing that we just met and could have allied ourself with: We killed it in 18 seconds!

MARISHA: Right.

SAM: It couldn't have helped us that much anyway! We're much more powerful than it. We don't need it. Let's go fucking kill Vokodo.

MARISHA: I said, fuck Vokodo. I'm just going to stand by that. And no one else said anything.

LAURA: I did, too. I said, I could and he said, "How?" And then we attacked them.

MARISHA: Well, no one anything afterwards.

LAURA: Sure, anyway, not a big deal.

MARISHA: Okay, everyone seems to be making it a big deal.

LAURA: No, it's not a big deal, though.

MARISHA: The DM just made it a big deal.

SAM: It's not a big deal.

MATT: I was clarifying because there was some confusion as to what may have transpired here and I didn't want to talk in circles.

SAM: We're talking about it so much because it's so not a big deal.

TRAVIS: Yeah, you shit the bed--

LAURA: It's not a big deal.

TRAVIS: -- but we can clean the sheets.

LAURA: Beau, no. No shitting happened. It is fine. Here's the thing.

SAM: No shitting.

LAURA: Veth makes a really good point.

MARISHA: Fuck you, Veth.

LAURA: We totally beat it super duper easy. I didn't even have any of my high level spells, neither did Caduceus. And Vilya, she didn't do anything. So when she goes in against Vokodo with us, she'll be fighting. It's like, we got a free ally with Vilya.

LIAM: Look sometimes in the heat--

MARISHA: I feel like you're just as upset and you're trying to make it better.

LAURA: I'm not upset at all.

MARISHA: I can tell, Jester.

LAURA: Beau, I'm not.

TALIESIN: I'm not.

LIAM: Hindsight--

LAURA: I'm trying to defend you.

LIAM: Hindsight is 20-20, especially in 2020. Okay? Sometimes you kill a horse that you did not need to kill.

MARISHA: 2020 was two thousand years ago.

LIAM: Sometimes you throw a knife into the back of a friendly nothic's head. He could have had a friendly story for you to know. You don't know.

SAM: These are strange hypotheticals.

TRAVIS: Oh, that's a deep cut. That was good. Nothic.

LIAM: Feels pretty fresh to me.

TRAVIS: What horse? What horse did we kill?

LIAM: We? There was no "we" who killed a horse. I killed a horse. (laughter)

SAM: Lesson learned. Not that there needed to be a lesson! There's no lesson!

ASHLEY: No lesson.

SAM: There's no lesson to be learned!

ASHLEY: No lesson learned.

SAM: Nothing learned! Tomorrow we kill Vokodo.

TRAVIS: God, you fucked up.

SAM: At dawn. (laughter)

LAURA: We're probably safe to camp here, though.

TALIESIN: Do we want to get part way?

SAM: That's right! You made us--

MATT: Seemed to act like the first punch stopped a possible conversation.

TRAVIS: Yeah, yeah, for sure.

MATT: Any of you had a chance to have any sort of interaction with these things to that battle.

LAURA: Well, by that point, our friends were possessed pretty fast and, you know, they were attacking us.

MATT: Yeah, totally.

MARISHA: I just want to say, our track record with ghosts hasn't been great.

MATT: That's true.

TALIESIN: That's fair.

LAURA: Well, that's not totally true, Beau, because I did read porn to some and they liked it.

MARISHA: You're-- that is correct.

TALIESIN: I don't remember that.

MARISHA: It's rare you find horny ghosts.

LIAM: How did you forget that?

LAURA: Oh, I don't think Caduceus was with us at that point.

TRAVIS: What are we doing next?

SAM: At dawn we kill Vokodo.

LAURA: Or do we head back to the beach?

MATT: Caduceus was with you guys when you did that.

LAURA: What?

TALIESIN: Oh, I was.

MATT: Caduceus was with you.

LAURA: Oh, okay, you remember. Maybe you were just distracted.

TALIESIN: I may have just tried not to pay attention.

TRAVIS: Are we actually weighing sleeping in a dome out here?

SAM: There's nothing here to hurt us.

LIAM: I think maybe on the top floor?

LAURA: Well, the top floor is very teeny.

TRAVIS: We don't think that the little specter that was in the sarcophagus is going to, like, gain power by resting and then come up through the floor and (choking) in the middle of the night?

LAURA: It's possible.

MARISHA: That's a good point.

LIAM: But then back that way are those walking bloody tree things.

TRAVIS: That's true.

TALIESIN: I say we--

MARISHA: Do you think we can ally with the bloody trees?

LIAM: But if we-- Hmm. But we could throw the dome up there so that the trees--

TRAVIS: I mean.

SAM: If we save that one?

TRAVIS: Should we talk to the walking talking-- they lost their minds, though.

MARISHA: I just want to make it right, guys.

SAM: No, no, no.

MARISHA: Okay, I'll find you some allies. (laughter)

ASHLEY: We-- we-- we all didn't make the right decisions here, maybe.

TALIESIN: I made your hands glow.

LIAM: It's not like you offered to restart a war between two nations.

SAM: That would be... (laughter) That would be crazy! Who would do such a thing?

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah.

TRAVIS: Of all the fucking... (laughter) What? You offered what?!

LAURA: Maybe, you know, it's still light outside. We can try making our way back.

ASHLEY: What time is it?

TRAVIS: ? Making our way back. ?

MATT: What was that?

ASHLEY: What time is it?

SAM: Today?

MATT: At this time--

SAM: We can't fly.

MATT: -- it's about 3:30, four o'clock in the afternoon.

TALIESIN: Yeah, so let's take time to start making our way so there's less to travel tomorrow.

LAURA: And, honestly, the less spells we have to expend getting back to the beach tomorrow, the more we can do.

LIAM: Honestly, we either camp here, which we don't need to do, or we just try to sneak back several hours on foot and park it in the jungle somewhere.

SAM: Okay.

MARISHA: Yeah, that sounds right.

TALIESIN: I'm into that.

LAURA: All right.

ASHLEY: There's nothing else to see around here?

LAURA: I think we did it.

TRAVIS: Yeah, I think that's it.

LAURA: I think we saw it.

TALIESIN: They do have a Dole Whip around the corner. (laughter)

LAURA: There's a decrepit

LIAM: (creature hissing) Slayer's Cake somewhere around here.

TRAVIS: Pineapple's good.

LIAM: That's what would have soothed their spirits. The Dole Whip.

TRAVIS: (ghost whisper) Pineapple. (laughter)

MATT: All right.

LAURA: (ghost whisper) I hunger. (laughter)

MATT: You gather yourselves and begin to make your trek back. The same path? The direction you were previously traveling?

LAURA: Yeah, we know that one.

MATT: Okay. A few hours journey, you make your way back to the edge of the jungle itself, where it begins to rise back up in its somewhat diseased state. You guys going stealthily from that point?

LAURA: Yeah.

SAM: Sure.

MATT: All right, everyone make a group stealth check for me, please.

MARISHA: No Pass Without a Trace, I'm assuming?

LAURA: Well, hold on, let me look. I might have some left.

LIAM: You got it?

LAURA: Pass Without a Trace. LIAM and

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: All right, round the tables.

MARISHA: A natural 20. Fuck you, Veth! (laughter)

TALIESIN: Can't even hear you, you're so stealthy.

SAM: Aggressive stealth.

MATT: To a total of-- what's the total?

MARISHA: Oh, 29.

LIAM: (whispers) Fuck you, Veth!

TALIESIN: 23.

MATT: 23. Well, plus 10 for--

TRAVIS: Yasha, come on, come on.

TALIESIN: Was that plus 10?

MARISHA: Oh, plus 10, 39.

MATT: 39, all righty.

LIAM: Rogue style.

TALIESIN: 23.

MATT: 23.

SAM: 39.

ASHLEY: 18.

LAURA: Nice, nice.

MATT: Veth and Beauregard, both equally vanishing into another campaign.

MARISHA: So Veth knew exactly-- she heard me. (laughter)

MATT: Yasha?

ASHLEY: 18.

LIAM: Just through the trees.

MATT: Exactly. Caleb?

LIAM: 15.

MATT: 15. Okay.

LAURA: 17.

MARISHA: I just fart right in her path.

TRAVIS: 27. (laughter)

LIAM: Hold up, there's danger.

SAM: But she's so stealthy. She cups it and throws it back. (laughter)

MATT: Like a hadouken?

MARISHA: Deflect Missiles! (laughter)

MATT: Okay, through this stealth fart duel, you do manage to quietly make your way beyond the boundaries of the dangerous animated trees that wander through this portion of the diseased forest. Eventually making your way deeper into the jungle, coming about the time dusk hits towards the northern base of the mountain of Rumblecusp. You can continue your journey or you could bed down here. You could, if you wanted to, continue and get more distance across the mountainside, into the evening, you're welcome to, or you could stop now.

SAM: Would we make it all the way back to the boats? Probably not, right?

MATT: You could if you traveled throughout the entire night. You could make part of the way there before midnight hits. Four hours of travel across the mountain range will get you a fair distance.

LAURA: If we sleep here and we fly in the morning, is it going to be just an hour of flight?

MATT: No, it would still be two hours from where you are. If you continue on for the mountain for a bit, you may be able to cut one hour off of that flight.

MARISHA: Try and do that.

SAM: It seems worth it, s Save a spell.

MARISHA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: I still have spells to burn. Not a lot of them, but I have a couple.

LAURA: Okay.

TRAVIS: And plus, are we going back to where the ships are, to the rear entrance? Are we going to try and go and turn Terra as well and add one to our number? Before we fight Vokodo?

TALIESIN: That's a good point.

TRAVIS: The hunting leader.

LAURA: We could try to do that. I don't have the ability to do that. Do you have any Greater Restoration left?

MATT: Well, you couldn't get to Vo tonight.

LAURA: We couldn't get to Vo.

MATT: Vo is on the opposite side of the mountain from you.

LAURA: We couldn't get to Vo tonight.

TALIESIN: I have one left if we had to.

MARISHA: But not tonight.

TALIESIN: No.

MARISHA: How many of those fancy bowls you got for Heroes' Feast?

SAM: Could we have Terra meet us?

LAURA: Meet us at Heaven Falls?

SAM: At Heaven Falls?

TRAVIS: Ooh, the place where she-- they? He, she, I can't remember. Firbolg.

MATT: She.

MARISHA: Terra?

TRAVIS: She is not supposed to go? Would she do that?

SAM: She could come close, maybe? Just to the edge of something.

LAURA: Vilya could maybe-- could you snag her? And fly her to us?

MATT: "Terra is a prickly sort. You'd have to be mighty convincing to get her to break rank from whatever she's in the middle of doing to walk out on a limb towards a place that Vokodo vehemently warns not to go near. It's possible, I'm just saying it's challenging."

TRAVIS: We might have to lie to her.

LAURA: Right.

TRAVIS: Send a message saying that.

LAURA: Hey Terra, Vilya needs your help.

SAM: No, not Vilya. Viridian, yeah.

LAURA: Viridian needs your help.

MATT: "You can try it."

SAM: And then-- just to game this out-- would lying to Terra to get her to come to a place where she's not supposed to be when she gets there, we're like, "Haha! We lied! But seriously, we need your help." Right?

LAURA: No, no, no. We'll-- Vilya would go up and be like, "I'm still Viridian," and then she would shake her hand and be like, "I'm so glad you came, I need your help." But she would cast Greater Restoration when she shook her hand and Terra will be totally free of it and she will help us.

TALIESIN: Takes about six seconds for Greater Restoration to take hold. And it was one thing to get you to sit still I don't know if--

MATT: "I can't say that I'm a great liar, but I can try?"

TRAVIS: Is Terra a magic user?

MATT: "No, not that I know of."

TRAVIS: Is Terra--

MATT: "Maybe on a small scale."

TRAVIS: Does she ever move alone as a hunting leader? Or does she usually travel with a troop?

MATT: "She travels with the troop. Best to survive that way."

LIAM: And if you are talking about sending a message, we need to word that one very carefully so that she doesn't come with a whole party.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

LIAM: Because we cannot handle that. At the moment.

TRAVIS: Maybe not worth the risk just to get one. I dunno how we would get just her.

LIAM: It's got to be one, otherwise it's a negative, not a positive.

TRAVIS: Big problem. Well, we get her that we kill all of her friends and then we turn her.

LIAM: There it is.

MARISHA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Kidding.

MARISHA: Oh, y-yeah. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Maybe not, maybe without Terra, then? And if so, are we taking that second entrance into Vokodo's lair? It's still pulled us towards, I'm assuming, it.

LAURA: Yeah, but maybe from a different direction.

TRAVIS: One it wasn't anticipating?

LAURA: Maybe it'll go above him or something.

TRAVIS: And it fights in water. There's no way to get him out unless we can collapse a volcano somehow. No one can do that-- you can't do that, can you?

MATT: "I don't believe I can, my apologies."

TRAVIS: You can't make the ground shake or anything?

MATT: "Not to that scale, no."

TRAVIS: You made a leg out of vines.

MATT: "Scales up a bit for what you're asking."

SAM: So no Terra, we just go in lean and mean? Is that what we're saying?

LIAM: I think that's right.

TRAVIS: We could try to coax it out. I mean, I did manage to-- I mean, something managed to piss it off. So maybe if we got close. I just feel like we're slower in the water. That's where it is. The influence is deeper down there.

SAM: Its lair might be trapped and protected.

LIAM: That's its home turf.

TRAVIS: We could send it a message when we got close, maybe? Talk some shit?

MARISHA: Vilya, do you know any reason why Vokodo would have a reason to come out?

MATT: "I've never, ever seen him emerge from his lair."

LIAM: Also, when angered we've already seen the volcano stoked. If it were really angered, who knows if that thing would blow or not? Is Vo directly beneath, down below?

MATT: It would be in a path of a full eruption, yes. And Vilya responds to that with like, "While my life was robbed from me for that time, and these people in this village are not truly my family, I'm still responsible for them to a degree. They're still good people. They're still trying to live and be happy. I would not want to put them in harm's way."

TRAVIS: Do you think fighting Vokodo would activate a volcano that would endanger them on the outside if we were fighting underneath?

MATT: "I don't...not if you were to finish the job."

TRAVIS: Boy.

LIAM: Ja. I think he's holding the cards. I think we have to go to the source. Because he's holding the town hostage. So flipping him the double birds from outside is just going to get people burned in magma. I think we just need to pick our place to camp and prepare ourselves the best we can and do what we do best: improvise.

SAM: Okay. Just throwing it out there, we could go in from both directions.

TRAVIS: Just thinking that.

MARISHA: Oh, that's interesting.

SAM: It would be nice to have more people, of course.

TRAVIS: It'd be nice to know where that second entrance actually goes.

LAURA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: And if there are all those weaving tunnels, where do those go?

MARISHA: Yeah, not all of them connect to the main chamber, there's no way.

TRAVIS: There's almost no way to explore it, though, without one of us being like, "uhh," and going towards the--

MARISHA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Unless you want to (popping) and we're out.

MARISHA: I'm always ready, yeah.

TRAVIS: I know that about you.

MARISHA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: We could also tie a line just as an early warning if someone starts to go.

TRAVIS: Oh, right.

TALIESIN: Like we've done before.

TRAVIS: Kind of tethered.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Yeah! That's a good idea.

LIAM: If you were tethered and you were in that state you were in, do you think you would cut that rope?

TALIESIN: I think I'd try. If we weren't going the way I wanted to go.

SAM: We take all of our weapons away.

TALIESIN: I honestly don't have anything to cut it.

TRAVIS: This plan. We go naked.

TALIESIN: It would give us an opportunity to see that someone was trying to leave, though.

SAM: Bind all of our hands and teeth so we can't cut or bite anything.

MARISHA: It's weird. I feel like we know so much more information about this enemy than we normally do. And yet I still have no idea how to fight it.

LAURA: We know none of his weaknesses.

MARISHA: We know he's greedy.

LIAM: Don't exactly know what he is.

TALIESIN: We know that if we shift him into another dimension, we could possibly hold them there.

TRAVIS: He doesn't want to go back. He was running from something.

MARISHA: We know he's greedy and we know he's afraid.

SAM: We do have a lot of cool stuff. So if someone wanted to go through the front door with an offering that could maybe distract it while the others go through the back door.

TRAVIS: Take my sword.

TALIESIN: We don't know how long that back door is going to take, though.

SAM: True.

TALIESIN: Or where it lets out.

SAM: We have means of communication. We could send messages to each other when we're in place.

TRAVIS: That back door comes with a charm chance, though. That's the fucking--

MARISHA: I mean, I think it all does.

LAURA: Yeah. And the only person that could probably get us through the original tunnels would be Caleb. He's the only one that would remember how to navigate.

TRAVIS: Or Frumpkin, but only to a distance, right? To explore those tunnels.

SAM: You mean the front door tunnels? He could draw a map.

LIAM: Any tunnels--

MARISHA: That's true.

LIAM: -- Frumpkin could go through, but I'm unaware if Vokodo's mojo would work on a fey creature.

MARISHA: Vilya also knows the way. A map's not a bad idea.

LAURA: I just don't think we should split the party.

MARISHA: It's a risk.

TRAVIS: It seems weird to be given a second entrance, though, and not utilize it.

LAURA: Yeah, I think we should just go in the back.

LIAM: We should. We can send my cat octopus ahead. Just to take a look. It might not work, but it is definitely worth the effort.

TALIESIN: By then we'll have--

LAURA: Are we still walking, or are we camping right now?

MATT: You guys are deciding whether or not you're taking the mountain pass or camping here at the base of the volcano.

MARISHA: Walk and talk. We're walk and talking.

MATT: Along the journey here, but you're deciding that stuff.

SAM: Just one more question for Viridian. Vilya. Has anyone else ever given an offering to Vokodo with you from the village?

MATT: "No, it's primarily just been me. Because the path is too dangerous for me to travel with more than just myself."

SAM: So Terra doesn't know how to get there, no one else knows how to get there.

MATT: "I mean, Terra might. Terra was here before I was, but--"

LAURA: How did they do the offerings without you?

MATT: "They had the previous spiritual guardian that would go ahead and make the offerings before they passed away."

SAM: Oh, they just died of old age or something?

MATT: "They had an accident."

LAURA: What kind of accident?

SAM: What was that? What's that?

MATT: "They never came back from their trip."

TRAVIS: Oh, that kind.

LAURA: Oh, he didn't like the offering.

MATT: "Well, we found their body during one of my journeys when we were looking for them. And it looks like the island took them. Those vines that I warned you about?"

MARISHA: It's an interesting point, though. Vokodo is comfortable around Vilya.

SAM: So Vilya could go in the front door with an offering.

MARISHA: Distract.

MATT: "I could."

TRAVIS: Vilya would still be susceptible to the pull, though.

LAURA: Well, yeah, but that's fine.

MATT: "I'm fairly strong of will. It's a gamble. And I could hope to and have probably the history to keep him engaged in conversation. I don't know if I could keep him entirely distracted. He senses, it seems, most anything on this island. Not to mention, well, the eyes."

TRAVIS: And the pull wears off once you're there, correct?

MATT: "It seems so, yes."

LIAM: Do we still have the same feeling of being watched right now?

MATT: As you take a moment to pull back and just look for that sensation, indeed, yes.

TRAVIS: Mountain pass?

TALIESIN: Mountain path.

LIAM: Sure, I can be down with that.

TRAVIS: Vilya goes to the front, we go to the back after Heroes' Feast?

SAM: Unless we come up with something better over text this week.

ASHLEY: Wouldn't he sense us?

LAURA: I mean, yeah.

ASHLEY: You know, isn't he always going to know where we are?

LAURA: I can try asking the Traveler. Maybe I can use Divine Intervention the way you did. I mean, that's a long shot. It's never worked for me.

ASHLEY: I wonder if the Traveler could--

SAM: But that's what faith is, right?

LAURA: Yeah, totally.

ASHLEY: I wonder if the Traveler could put out the volcano so it doesn't erupt if it gets bad.

LAURA: But what if the Traveler could shroud us, keep him from being able to see us?

TALIESIN: It's always worth going for the smaller miracle.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

LAURA: Does that seem like a smaller one?

TALIESIN: Yeah.

TRAVIS: I think so.

TALIESIN: I mean, volcano's a lot.

ASHLEY: A volcano's a lot.

MATT: It's an interesting idea. Okay, go ahead and roll.

MARISHA: What is that? What was that?

MATT: This is me--

TRAVIS: Weighing it?

MATT: Well, no, this is me going, given the circumstances, given Traveler Con's arrival.

LAURA: No.

MATT: Given the idea, I was going to give advantage on the roll, so you could-- you don't really have advantage on a percentile die, but we're doing it here.

LIAM: It's a long shot but.

LAURA: It's a long shot.

LIAM: Chance is a chance.

LAURA: No. I wonder what it would have been if it hadn't fallen. No, okay.

MATT: Worthy attempt, worthy attempt.

TALIESIN: Can I see that sword hilt when you get a second?

LAURA: I have it.

TALIESIN: I'm just going to run Detect Magic over it really quick, just to--

MATT: Not magic, unfortunately.

LAURA: Does it have any kind of runes or anything on it?

MATT: It does have some language.

LAURA: Infernal?

MATT: Yeah, actually. So you go ahead and look into it and it looks like this blade was the blade of the lord. And as part of the interring of the body, the blade was destroyed to gift the power of the blade to the spirit.

LAURA: Oh, that's cool.

TALIESIN: Did we take the armor, too?

MATT: No, the armor was left.

TALIESIN: Darn.

MARISHA: With that, though, is there-- we know Vokodo is greedy.

TALIESIN: I was definitely going to think about giving it as a gift.

MARISHA: Is there something any of you magic users can do where you can infuse a trap onto an item or something?

LAURA: Ooh!

TALIESIN: I've never done it before, but--

LAURA: We do have a thing.

TALIESIN: Yeah, maybe.

MARISHA: If that's part of Vilya's offering.

TRAVIS: Caduceus, you can imbue an item with, like, sunlight, right so?

TALIESIN: I can imbue an item with a lot of things.

LAURA: I can-- what is it, that ward?

MATT: Oh, (chuckles). I know what you're talking about.

SAM: Yeah, the--

MARISHA: Me, are you talking to me?

MATT: No, I'm talking to Jester.

SAM: You can put a symbol on something that explodes, right?

LAURA: Yeah. I can't remember what level it is.

SAM: It's pretty big.

LAURA: It's either 5th or 6th.

MATT: Let me see here.

MARISHA: That could be our cue. If you're able to hand off a couple of grenades to it.

LAURA: Yeah.

MARISHA: When we hear the bomb goes off, we go in. Finish it off.

LAURA: Cad, what is the fucking--?

SAM: I think it's called Glyph of Warding?

LAURA: Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's what it is. Oh, I'm not looking at my--

MATT: 3rd-level.

LAURA: It's 3rd-level? That's it?

MATT: Correct. But at higher levels-- you can cast it at higher levels to do more damage.

MARISHA: And you can set when-- the parameters around which it--

MATT: Correct. It lasts until dispelled or triggered. Because it takes an hour to cast. So in theory, you could cast it the night before.

LIAM: On a good item.

MATT: Depending on how many 3rd-level slots you have on multiple items.

MARISHA: Hand it over, plant a bunch of grenades on it. Trigger it when we're ready.

TALIESIN: Or any spell. 3rd-level or lower.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Ah, but if you choose an object that object must remain in its place. If the object is moved more than 10 feet from where you cast the spell, the glyph is broken.

LAURA: Aw.

MATT: So you have to be real creative in how you'd move that item.

SAM: You put it on an item--

MARISHA: If it's moved more than 10 feet in this dimension? Fuck. But then, okay.

TALIESIN: That will be an experiment for another day.

SAM: Yeah, it could go in a little pocket dimension. Doesn't Caleb have those?

MARISHA: Pull it up, but then as soon as he grabs it-- does it trigger once it's moved 10 feet or...?

MATT: When it's moved 10 feet from where it is, it's triggered. But if you cast the spell, and then were like, for say, seal it amber.

MARISHA: Yeah, put it in amber.

MATT: Technically, it's not being moved from where--

MARISHA: Give it to it. If it yanks it, then it's going to explode.

MATT: That's pretty interesting.

LIAM: Oh, Vokodo, here we present you (thumping) these fine gifts to you.

MARISHA: With this platter. Here you go.

SAM: And we're just going to back up. (laughter)

LIAM: The only question is, is he listening to us right now? But it is a fine idea and worth trying all the same.

MARISHA: Well, that's why we've been calling him Guacamole this whole time and he definitely doesn't know who we're talking about.

MATT: Vilya does speak up on this and says, "It's interesting. Whenever I visit, he often asks about the goings on within the village and around. So I don't know if he hears what we say. He just knows where we are."

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: "That's my assumption based on all the time I've been. Because he has asked questions that, if he were indeed listening in, he would know the answer."

TALIESIN: Oh!

LAURA: Okay, that's good.

TALIESIN: Well, we've been scouting--

LIAM: Super. He has sight.

TALIESIN: We've been scouting for places to have the event.

LAURA: Obviously.

TALIESIN: And we've at least found a sword hilt so far to give.

LAURA: Yeah.

SAM: But if he senses where we are, then he'll know that we're coming up the back door.

TALIESIN: Yep.

LIAM: Yeah.

LAURA: Maybe.

SAM: Unless you're extremely distracting.

MATT: "I can't tell you. I don't know."

SAM: It's worth a shot.

LIAM: But this is an excellent idea. And it might make it worth it to enter the front door now.

MARISHA: And we just all put a glyph or as many glyphs as we can on items?

LIAM: And we still need to think things through and be ready for a head to head battle in case this does not work. And it very well might not. Probably won't, but worth trying.

TRAVIS: Definitely.

MARISHA: He did say that these gifts were good for now. That they were initial gifts and that he anticipated us returning anyway, so... It's not going to seem shifty, I wouldn't think, if we come back and report our findings and tell him where we're going to have Traveler Con. With a new offering.

TALIESIN: It also takes diamond to do it.

MARISHA: Yikes.

TALIESIN: Powdered diamond.

MARISHA: Powdered?

TALIESIN: 200 gold worth.

LAURA: Well, we can do it.

LIAM: Well, I can powder it if you have it.

LAURA: I have one.

TALIESIN: I think I'm a little nervous about powdering diamond.

LIAM: How do you mean?

TALIESIN: Diamond is a very useful component for if something goes really wrong. And we don't have a lot.

TRAVIS: I think we should take the lesson from today and just try and talk to Vokodo. (laughter) Let's learn from Beau's mistake.

TALIESIN: I cast Blindness.

TRAVIS: (yells) (laughter)

MATT: Make a constitution saving throw.

TRAVIS: No!

TALIESIN: Yeah!

TRAVIS: Oh, that's not-- Oh, constitution, that's worse. 15.

MATT: You go blind.

TALIESIN: What did we learn now?

TRAVIS: I'm fine.

TALIESIN: Yeah. (laughter) There's a time and place. And at the time for talking, sadly, has definitely passed.

TRAVIS: You're still talking.

TALIESIN: Just trying to teach. (snaps) There we are.

MATT: And it fades.

TRAVIS: Oh, thank you.

TALIESIN: Oh, I miss my siblings. That's fine.

LAURA: It doesn't do, like, a crazy ton of damage.

TALIESIN: No, I think there are better--

LAURA: Unless you did it at a high level and then that's wasting a...

TALIESIN: I'd rather just--

MATT: Well, depends on if you-- Depends on if you use a bunch-- I mean, depending on how many 3rd-level slots you have the night before.

LAURA: Yeah, but it takes a 200-- a diamond worth 200 gold each time.

LIAM: What about a good case of Fluffernutter? Could we get a nice gilded case or box full of powder with a glyph on it?

LAURA: I mean, I can paint a really beautiful gilded box.

LIAM: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Hey!

LAURA: I can paint a lot of treasure. Upon close inspection he would know, but it would look like something amazing before that.

LIAM: Maybe there's some powder in the boats?

TRAVIS: Picked clean, right?

SAM: Our boat's gone.

LAURA: Veth has a lot of--

SAM: But I have two bombs. I have a Fluffernutter and I have a depth charge.

TALIESIN: I don't think they're going to do. I think this is going to be a lot of magic and a lot-- maybe light. Since there's so much shadow. I don't know. Not fire.

SAM: But hey, if we're going to deliver an item, might as well have it full of black powder. Just gives us one more, one more weapon in the fight, I suppose?

LAURA: Sure. We can work on that when we camp tonight.

TRAVIS: Yeah, it wasn't nothing when we used it against the hydra.

SAM: Sure.

LAURA: Yeah.

MARISHA: What do I have?

LAURA: Are we still walking?

LIAM: Well, all we have to decide now--

SAM: To be continued.

MATT: You guys are continuing to discuss and plot your plans for whatever may come in the morrow. You precariously hike alongside the volcano's edge, the northeastern and eastern edge in the dark of night. And we'll pick up there next week.

LIAM: Scratching their heads as they go.

TALIESIN: I am ready.

MATT: Got some interesting plots and plans to do.

SAM: D&D.

MATT: Yeah.

SAM: Coming up with all the answers on the fly.

MATT: Oh yeah. All righty, we'll pick up there next week. Thank you guys so much for joining us. I hope you had fun with this chaos as much as we do. We love you very much, and is it Thursday yet? Good night!