Transcript:Malice and Mystery Below

List of Transcripts

Pre-Show
MATT: Hello, everyone, and welcome to tonight's episode of Critical Role, where a bunch of us nerdy-ass voice actors sit around and play Dungeons & Dragons.

ALL: (hollering) We play Dungeons & Dragons!

SAM: Zop a doop a doop.

MATT: Before we jump into tonight's episode, and I slowly bleed from one nostril from whatever that wall of sound was, we are going to get through some announcements, beginning with our two sponsors, the first of which is D&D Beyond. Sam.

SAM: Hit it, guys. Tonight, we're in the holiday mood, and so we're going to sing you a holiday Christmas carol. (to the tune of "Silent Night")

♪ Violent night ♪ ♪ Holy shit ♪ ♪ Matt's going to kill us ♪ ♪ We should quit ♪ ♪ Our fate is tied ♪ ♪ to the roll ♪ ♪ of the dices ♪ ♪ And all our stats ♪ ♪ on our tablet devices ♪ ♪ Convenient all night long ♪ ♪ Praise D&D Beyond ♪

Why don't you join in with me?

ASHLEY: Okay.

SAM: This time.

LIAM: Oh god.

ALL: ♪ Violent night ♪ ♪ We're going to die ♪ ♪ Matt makes baby sounds, ♪ ♪ Willingham cries ♪ ♪ Round the table, ♪ ♪ a group of best friends ♪

LIAM: Oof!

ALL: ♪ It's such a shame that tonight's how it ends ♪ ♪ Most of us aren't gonna live ♪

MATT: ♪ Roll for initiative ♪ (laughter)

TRAVIS: All the angels lost their wings.

SAM: Happy holidays from D&D Beyond.

MARISHA: Aww. (cheering)

ASHLEY: Yay.

MATT: Well done, Sam.

SAM: Some of those words we could hear.

MATT: You finally got one.

LIAM: Man, happy TPK, everybody.

ASHLEY: Yay, TPK.

MATT: Oh boy. Thank you, D&D Beyond. And our second sponsor for tonight is Skillshare. So for those who aren't familiar, they're an online learning community with thousands of inspiring classes for creative and curious people. Skillshare specifically offers classes designed for real life and all the circumstances that come with it, including graphic design, creative writing, music. With membership starting as low as $10 a month with an annual subscription, Skillshare is a great way to learn and explore classes to unlock your creativity for social good. And as a special offer for our audience, the first 1000 Critters to join Skillshare by following the link, which is SKL.SH for Skillshare, skl.sh/criticalrole4, Skillshare.

SAM: It sounds like a Cardi B thing.

MATT: Could be. Go to skl.sh/criticalrole4. Will get a two-month free trial of a premium membership. So check it out if you can for yourself, and thank you guys for supporting our fantastic show. (cheering) Got some announcements here. Marisha, if you want to go.

MARISHA: Yes. I have an announcement that I was aware of. (laughter) Narrative Telephone returns for a story told by Laura Bailey. Little holiday story, with special guest Mica Burton, everybody. (cheering) Catch the episode on Twitch this Tuesday, December 15th at 4:00pm Pacific. YouTube on Thursday, December 17th, as always. I did it.

SAM: You did it! (laughter)

MATT: Well done, Marisha.

MARISHA: Thank you.

MATT: Well done.

MARISHA: Thank you.

MATT: Great, and Laura, you had some things you wanted to mention as well.

LAURA: I did! I have-- it's specific. Keep an eye on our social media accounts, and check out our US, UK, and Australia stores to see what's new! I think there's new stuff in there, I'm not sure. You can sign up for our newsletter to stay updated on all our recent merch launches. Are they doing this because I'm not doing very good job announcing our stuff? I don't know, but we're saying this now. (laughter) Yeah, sign up for our merch. No, nope, sign up for our newsletter. Cool announcements, critrole.com/newsletter.

SAM: Did they tell you, like, you got to stick to the script?

LAURA: They didn't tell me that. But--

MARISHA: They just took away her script.

LAURA: They just took-- (laughter) No, they didn't do that! Because I love holding up the stuff! I'm still going to hold up stuff. This is just-- this is just right now, because, you know.

TRAVIS: "This is just right now."

LAURA: Who knows what's in the store right now? Things are coming in like crazy time. It's crazy. (laughter) Don't look at me anymore. Look-- Matt!

MATT: Thank you, Laura. I got you.

LIAM: Remember, when times are tough: This is just right now.

TRAVIS: This is just right now.

MATT: This is just right now. All right, I believe that concludes our announcements.

MARISHA: Oh good.

MATT: So. Let's go ahead and jump into tonight's episode of Critical Role.

(water bubbling) (thunder rumbling) (explosion) ♪ Role, Critical Role ♪ ♪ Role, Critical Role ♪ ♪ Role, Critical Role ♪ ♪ Role, Critical Role ♪ ♪ Role, Critical Role ♪ ♪ Role, Critical Role ♪ ♪ Roll the dice ♪ ♪ The adventure begins ♪ ♪ They were always beside you ♪ ♪ Your nerdy best friends ♪ ♪ And the DM to guide you ♪ ♪ And they rise from the flames for the battles ahead ♪ ♪ Villains beware because you're about to be dead ♪ ♪ They got magic and flair ♪ ♪ They got falchions and cunning ♪ ♪ They don't see over there ♪ ♪ There's a monster incoming ♪ ♪ Inspiration is waiting, rise up, don't think twice ♪ ♪ Put your fate in your hands, take a chance, ♪ ♪ roll the dice ♪ ♪ Roll the dice ♪ ♪ Critical Role (roll the dice) ♪ ♪ Critical Role (roll the dice) ♪ ♪ Ooh, ahh ♪ ♪ Can you answer the call ♪ ♪ Diggin' deep in your soul ♪ ♪ As the legend unfolds ♪ ♪ Now it's your turn (your turn, your turn) ♪ ♪ to roll ♪ (flames whooshing)

Part I
MATT: Welcome back. So last we left off: The Mighty Nein, following and now slightly ahead of the tracks of Lucien and the Tomb Takers, making their way from place to place across Foren in Eiselcross, seeking elements they're gathering before eventually heading towards the central Aeorian ruins on this portion of the region. You delve into your second Aeorian ruin, located as A2 on the map that you were given by the late Lady Vess DeRogna. You made a small friend, one outlier, who had already gone into this ruin, but the rest of his group had not returned in days. Leaving him to fend for himself in the shadow, you began to explore aspects of this particular excavation. You found a terribly ruined street, and it looked like a arcane dome; sealed within, Aeorian citizens, still frozen in those moments of cataclysm. Then, following your spell, locating a directional blip towards a possible threshold crest within these ruins, you went and eventually discovered the entrance to some sort of Aeorian laboratory, which was covered in shattered glass and fallen implements, and with some spell help through Caleb, able to ascertain some of these ancient language bits that were previously misunderstood-- or not understood by any of you. You managed to fix one of the doors and hit one of the arcane-based button prompts on a nearby pedestal, causing the door behind you to slam shut and a door ahead, where you were planning to go, to open up. Where a horrible, baneful cry, began to echo through the chamber. Snuffing the light and hiding amongst the room, you all watched as a terrifying beast began to lumber in. Its strange, somewhat muscular, but sagging, elephant-like body, helming the front, a smooth, slick, cherub-like, bulbous human baby face in the front, clouded over pupil-less eyes, a mouth that split open in the center, filled with teeth, as numerous human arms, small, reached out for whatever was nearby the front of its toothy maw. (laughter)

MARISHA: Own it!

MATT: Out the front of its forehead, you saw dangling a tendril of some kind. At the end, a bulb of glowing light that swung as it entered, and as it began to step into the chamber--

LAURA: Rancor it.

MATT: What's up?

LAURA: I want to Rancor it. Slam the door down on it.

TALIESIN: Yeah, Rancor it.

MATT: Okay. So I guess that'll be what kicks off initiative, then.

SAM and MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: So Jester.

TRAVIS: We're not talking to it?

LAURA: I don't think we're talking to it.

ASHLEY: But it's a baby.

LAURA: No, it's not a baby.

ASHLEY: I know.

LAURA: It's got giant human arms coming out of his face, too.

MATT: You hit the button and the door behind you (creaking) The other door does not close.

SAM: What?

MATT: When it slammed shut it, dislodged again from its mooring, how you had to fix it to put it back inside, when it fell it once again, it managed to get itself wedged.

TRAVIS: Oh shit.

MATT: So as you hit the button--

LAURA: We have to fix it before we can

MATT: -- you hear the (door creak) on the backside and the creature suddenly (grunting) glances in your direction. I need you all to roll for initiative. (yelling)

TRAVIS: Oh spicy baby.

LIAM: There's no cheat code for this. Someone's going to die.

MATT: No cheat code.

TALIESIN: I don't like that.

LIAM: Shit.

TRAVIS: What the fuck?

LIAM: Damn it.

TRAVIS: Oh, it's not bad.

LIAM: I hate rolling high initiative.

TRAVIS: My initiative sucked in this campaign.

MATT: All righty, so.

TRAVIS: I miss Grog.

MATT: 25 to 20?

MARISHA: 21.

TALIESIN: 21.

LAURA: Ooh. Oh no.

LIAM: 20.

ASHLEY: 20 for me as well.

TRAVIS: Caduceus at the top?

LAURA: Caduceus and Beau. So probably Beau then Caduceus.

MATT: What'd you get, Caleb?

LIAM: 20.

MATT: Okay, so 20 and--

ASHLEY: I rolled a natural 20.

MATT: Plus?

ASHLEY: Plus three, so 23.

MATT: Oh, so.

TRAVIS: Yasha's at the top.

ASHLEY: I'm going first.

MARISHA: Yeah.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MARISHA: She rocks.

MATT: All righty. 20 to 15.

LAURA: Oh, 18.

MATT: 18 for Jester. There we are.

TALIESIN: We are top loaded.

SAM: ♪ (sings with music) ♪

MATT: 15 to 10.

TRAVIS: 14.

MATT: 14.

ASHLEY: Oh boy.

SAM: Oh boy.

MATT: 10 to five?

SAM: Eight.

MATT: All right, holding up the rear there, we have Veth.

TRAVIS: So Yasha, Beau, Caduceus, Caleb, right?

LAURA: Yasha, Beau, Caduceus, Caleb Jester, Fjord, Veth.

MATT: Correct.

MARISHA: Me and you are both flanking the door, right?

ASHLEY: Yes.

MARISHA: Yeah, dope.

MATT: Yasha, you are up first.

ASHLEY: Sentinel bitches.

MARISHA: Sentinel bitches.

MATT: So.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: As you stand there, as it enters the space, you look over towards it. Make a wisdom saving throw for me.

LAURA: Just from looking at it?

TRAVIS: Oh fuck.

SAM: It's a bad--

ASHLEY: Oh no! 10.

LIAM: Shit.

MATT: 10. With your weapon ready, as it comes in, you glance over, and as the light of the lure hits your eyes, your arms fall.

SAM: But you had initiative and she was-- aww.

ASHLEY: It's okay, it okay. I mean, it's a thing.

MATT: You watch your-- you move half your movement towards it.

TRAVIS: (gasps) (loud scream) This is real bad! This is real bad!

MATT: And you are stunned until the start of your next turn.

LAURA: Oh no, oh no, oh no.

MATT: You guys watch as Yasha just walks out just dragging the weapon behind her, looking up at the lure. and just stands there.

LAURA: We got to fix Yasha's brain.

LIAM: It's going to eat her like a hoagie.

SAM: How many times have you been possessed?

MARISHA: Beauregard, start of your turn, make a wisdom saving throw.

MARISHA: Oh yikes!

ASHLEY: -- it's just a stupid wisdom!

LAURA: Did you do it, too?

MARISHA: Oh yeah, he's said started my turn I make it.

TRAVIS: Matthew!

MATT: Yeah, as you look over towards it, and begin to see Yasha walk, you look over at the lure.

TRAVIS: You need a hug.

ASHLEY: Oh no.

TRAVIS: Say it. Say it.

MARISHA: That is going to be eight total.

LIAM: Oh!

TRAVIS: Oh shit.

MATT: You look over and see this happening to Yasha, and you begin to dart outward to help her and then your eyes catch the light on the end of its lure and you also--

MARISHA: I have good wisdom, too. I just rolled terribly.

MATT: Yeah, you did.

TRAVIS: Oh my god.

LAURA: Oh no, what is going to happen? Are we all going to die right now?

SAM: Dagen! Dagen!

TRAVIS: Shake it up, we got to rattle the cage. Let's go.

MATT: Caduceus. You're up next. Caduceus hasn't seen any of this, by the way.

TALIESIN: No.

SAM: Wait, why?

LAURA: Because he's behind the wall.

MATT: Because he's behind the wall over that side. What are you doing, Caduceus?

LIAM: Pretty close because the wall between--

TALIESIN: One second.

TRAVIS: Oh boy.

TALIESIN: I was not prepared to be going so soon. So I was not quite together with this.

LIAM: And it's pitch black in here other than this thing's eyeball.

MATT: Other than the light that you can guys can see just faintly scatting-- scattering not scatting. (laughter) Scatting and quiffing a little, if you will. (laughter)

TRAVIS: (farting noises)

MATT: Scattering across the floor, you can see it catching the edge of some of the rubble and debris on the floor across from the edge of the wall, but you do not see anything beyond that. A couple of shadows that stretch across as your teammates move.

TALIESIN: I'm going to stick with my early plan, and I'm going to cast Antilife Shell.

MATT: Antilife Shell, okay.

TRAVIS: Oh man.

LAURA: Oh god, oh god, I'm terrified right now.

LIAM: Is that light dim light or bright light?

MATT: Huh?

LIAM: From the baby?

MATT: From the baby, it is a bright light within 15 feet and dim light within 30.

LIAM and LAURA: Okay.

TRAVIS: Dude, this is a problem.

ASHLEY: So glad I rolled a natural 20 on initiative where it doesn't mean anything.

MATT: I'm so sorry.

ASHLEY: (frustrated noise)

MATT: It's a 10-foot radius, you said?

TALIESIN: It's 10-foot radius.

MATT: I will say-- this'll be your shell. So that'll be your antilife shell there.

TALIESIN: Cool.

LAURA: Ooh, cool.

TALIESIN: I was going to go invisible and look around the-- Well, I was going to start moving around the corner, but I suppose I'm going to turn around the-- I'm going to keep my distance and see what the hell is going on.

TRAVIS: Does it move with you or does it stay in one place?

TALIESIN: It moves with me.

TRAVIS: Great.

TALIESIN: I mean, I was not going to head towards it, I was just going to keep distance--

MATT: Where do you want to go?

TALIESIN: Like towards the stairs just to look,

TRAVIS: Should he look at it--

TALIESIN: And what do I see?

TRAVIS: -- that's not bad. Move that fucking payload towards it.

MATT: There, as soon as you get to that point, which you are now invisible, but with your antilife shell around you, you just move to the side. You can see the light on the edge there, and you see both Yasha and Beauregard, just staring up.

TALIESIN: Oh shit.

MATT: Like, right in front of it, as its mouth is like, (growling). So that's your action, that's your most of your move, you still have five feet there.

TALIESIN: I'm going to back up five feet.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: And tell Caleb what I saw. They're out of it, it's moving towards us, it did something. I don't know.

MATT: And with that, it's your turn, Caleb.

LIAM: (stammering)

MATT: Jester, you're on deck.

LAURA: Mm-hmm.

LIAM: Caleb just stammers for the first five of his six seconds and then lights up the driftglobe with the Daylight spell.

MATT: Okay. All right. So light begins to fill the chamber around so now you have a much better view and anybody else who does not have darkvision has a much better view of the entirety of this room.

LIAM: Bright-bright, it's daylight. And I will scooch forward a little bit, even though I can't see him anymore. A little bit like Caduceus did so that I can try to-- Yeah, I'll move straight forward.

MATT: Okay. How far?

LIAM: I'd be in that bubble, I think. That's as far as I would need to go to see, to peek to the left and once I saw Beauregard and Yasha, I would stop.

MATT: About there is where you would see them.

LIAM: Yeah, I will stop right there.

MATT: Okay. You got it.

LIAM: Oh boy.

TRAVIS: Yep. Well, we're in it, let's go. Here we go.

MARISHA: This is the second fight in a row that the--

MATT: So that's your movement.

MARISHA: -- melee people have biffed it.

MATT: And the action would be the globe, that's right. So yeah.

MARISHA: And the clerics had to save our ass.

ASHLEY: It's super fun.

MATT: Jester, you're up.

MARISHA: Yeah.

LAURA: Okay. I'm going to have my duplicate step right up to baby.

MATT: All righty.

SAM: Baby dupes.

LAURA: Touch it and cast Inflict Wounds at 6th-level.

MATT: Roll for an attack. 6th-level, yeah!

LIAM: Yep.

MARISHA: Oh no.

TRAVIS: Say it.

MARISHA: No, no, no.

LAURA: Natural 20.

SAM: No, no. Bad.

TRAVIS: Could be bad.

SAM: Well, there's magic stuff.

MATT: Well, here's the thing. Here's the thing, here's the thing. First off, it is a spell with an attack roll, which means natural 20 does double damage.

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: So, on top of that, I need you to roll a d100 for me. So roll 2d10.

LIAM: It's going to be random-- this is Wild Magic shit.

TALIESIN: Side effects are going to happen.

LIAM: Yep, could be good, could be bad.

MARISHA: Please be good.

LIAM: It's a slot machine.

TRAVIS: (fingers snap)

LIAM: (slot machine ticking)

LAURA: Well, wait, hold on, because I don't know which is which. So I'm going to reroll and roll, like, a percentile, yeah.

MATT: Yeah, percentile die.

LAURA: 63.

MATT: 63, all right. So I'll explain what happens. So go ahead and roll damage for that. Because the spell goes through. You reach out with your-- I'll say your illusionary duplicate reaches out and touches it. You watch as its hand reaches out, the magical energy gathers around your hand, and then at the same time mirrors on your duplicate. And as it touches, it vanishes from your arm and instead (whooshing) spikes to the body of this creature. You watch as these dark black and purple almost like bolts of lightning arc begin to through and as it does, you watch skin and flesh begin to split as it just works its way up its body.

LAURA: Okay.

MARISHA: Roll high.

LAURA: Okay.

MARISHA: Roll high.

LAURA: Hold on, hold on, I was paying attention to what he was saying, so I wasn't rolling.

MATT: So what's the damage on that? Is it 3d10?

LAURA: On a level one, so 8d10. (howling)

LAURA and MATT: Times two. That is a lot.

SAM: That's sick damage.

LAURA: Nine, nine, 18. Nine!

MATT: (chuckling) Okay.

LAURA: 27.

MARISHA: Nein!

TALIESIN: Oh!

LAURA: Nine. 35, 39, plus eight is 40... Two.

SAM: Seven.

LAURA: What?

SAM: 39 plus eight is--

LAURA: 47, plus six is 50... One.

MARISHA: A hundred!

LAURA: No, 53.

MATT: 53, so 106 points of necrotic damage.

ASHLEY and TRAVIS: Whoa!

TRAVIS: Jester!

MARISHA and TRAVIS: Holy shit.

MARISHA: Oh.

MATT: Yeah, wow. (laughs) Yeah, so. It burrows through its body and you hear it (groaning) beginning to screech in pain as it begins to rear up its hands for a moment, and all these magical butterflies begin to just swirl around it.

TALIESIN: Oh, thank god.

MATT: And just add this weirdly beautiful mystique to the atmosphere around this horrifying abomination.

TRAVIS: That's the effect. Okay, okay, okay!

MARISHA: That is the most Jester thing.

TRAVIS: Yeah, it is!

MATT: As soon as you rolled it, I was like, "Yeah, that checks out."

SAM: Wow.

MARISHA: Inflict deadly, corrosive, necromantic wounds, and also butterflies.

MATT: On brand.

LIAM: But it's a baby.

MATT: Do you want to move at all on your turn?

LAURA: Yes, as me, my person, I'm going to run and try to get on the other side of the room, like behind Caduceus

MATT: Six. That's about as far as you can make it.

LAURA: Yeah, that's about as far as I want.

LIAM: She died in the attempt.

LAURA: I'll say on the other side of those stairs, I'll do just a straight line. Yeah.

MATT: Right there?

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: There you go. That finishes your go, Jester.

MARISHA: That would it be the worst.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: It is now the creature's turn.

MARISHA: Trip and fall.

SAM: Watch out, Beau and Yasha.

LIAM: Hit your head on the same.

ASHLEY: At least we're, like, Sentinel stunned.

MATT: So.

MARISHA: Yeah.

ASHLEY: That's not good.

LAURA: Did have to roll a con s-- No, it didn't because it's a light source.

MATT: The creature, at this point, after the blast of the impact and pain that it takes (growling). (retching) And you watch his body tenses and wretches. And this spray of caustic bile goes firing out in front of it.

LIAM: Oh. Spit up.

ASHLEY: And it just misses us.

MATT: No.

ASHLEY: I'm just kidding.

LIAM: It gets right between.

MATT: I need you both to make a constitution saving throws.

ASHLEY: Okay.

LIAM: That's good for Yasha.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

TRAVIS: It is such a crazy looking mini. "Mini."

LIAM: Beregerd.

MARISHA: 16. It's okay.

MATT: 16?

ASHLEY: Same.

MATT: Same?

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MATT: Both fail.

MARISHA: Yep, yep, yep.

ASHLEY: Cool, cool, cool.

MATT: You both take 42 points of acid damage as you're both just coated, and it begins to singe and burn. You watch as smoke and steam begin to rise off of both Beauregard and Yasha, as their eyes blink and you feel yourself, the pain rising up. It's also going to begin to move forward, and is going to trample past both of you.

SAM: Whoa.

LAURA: Oh, you guys can't hit it.

MATT: Both of you are knocked prone unless you can make-- Oh, you are stunned. "Automatically fail strength and dex saving throws," so you're both knocked prone.

LIAM: Just in the bile on the ground.

MATT: Correct.

ASHLEY and MARISHA: (sigh)

MATT: That finishes its turn.

SAM: Oh.

MATT: All right. Fjord, you're up, and Veth, you're on deck.

TRAVIS: Sure. Does it trample into my field of view from that wall position?

MATT: Yes, and between the light source from the middle of its lure and the bright, daylight source the globe that Caleb trotted out there the entire chamber is lit, so you have a clean shot on it.

TRAVIS: Can I use my bonus action to cast Hexblade's Curse?

MATT: Yes, you may.

LIAM: I'm going to cast Hexblade's Curse!

MATT: Hold that for me, if you don't mind.

TRAVIS: And can I use my movement to try and run back towards you and get behind this table.

MATT: Right there, yeah.

TRAVIS: Yeah, cool. And I will send three Eldritch Blasts.

LAURA: Three Eldritch Blasts.

MATT: Go for it.

TRAVIS: Jesus. That's a 20.

MATT: 20 hits.

TRAVIS: All right. That is a 29.

MATT: 29 hits.

TRAVIS: And a six-- 26. That hits.

TRAVIS: Amazing, amazing. No 20-- 22, sorry. 22.

MATT: 22 hits.

TRAVIS: Okay.

MATT: So three hits, go ahead and roll damage.

ASHLEY: ♪ (sings with background music) ♪

TRAVIS: 12, 27. 38 points of force damage.

MATT: Nice, all righty. So as you jump behind, leap behind the table skidding, hearing the sound of stone and broken glass shaking off your boots and hitting the wall behind you. You spin around and throw all three of your Eldritch Blasts forward. (whooshing) Each time (impacts) impacting on the side. With each blast, it leaves a dark spot and the small crater where you can see some of its dark blood pour out the side. It takes the hits, but right now it's still looking around and getting a feel for the environment around it.

TRAVIS: Cool. Yeah, I'll take a knee and just try and put as much of my body behind the table.

MATT: You got it.

TRAVIS: Just because there's puking terribleness.

MATT: You got it, all right. Veth, you're up. Top of your turn, I need you to make a wisdom saving throw for me, please.

SAM: Oh no. How come they didn't have to?

MARISHA: Where are you?

MATT: Unless you would like to avert your gaze.

SAM: No, I'm aiming.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: If you're within a certain distance from it, is that what it is?

MARISHA: Yeah.

SAM: You don't--

MARISHA: Where is Veth?

LAURA: Where is Veth on the board?

SAM: I'm hiding between a cage, I think.

MATT: Yeah, you're over here.

SAM: Yeah. I rolled a 10, but this is a wisdom saving throw, so that's 16.

MATT: 16, does not make it.

SAM: Oh.

MATT: Wait, no, 16 does, you're right, you're good. So you're good.

TRAVIS: Oh boy.

MATT: Sorry. So yeah, you succeed on the save. You feel the draw for second, you wince your eyes, and shake it out of your head. You're good to go.

SAM: Then from my hidden position-- I believe I'm hidden.

MATT: Yes.

SAM: I will shoot and fire.

MATT: Do it.

SAM: I roll once. And I got an 18 plus a lot. So I'm sure that hits, 29 to hit.

MATT: That hits.

SAM: And then-- so this is sneak attack damage. And, in the previous game, before we wrapped, I had said that I had cast Voltaic Bolt.

MATT: Yes, and had that prepped.

SAM: So it's all prepped, so. Oh, these are all twos, okay.

MATT: That's okay, just the adds some balance to the other spell that does 106 damage in a single round.

SAM: Great, so that's-- Almost done, sorry, lots of--

TALIESIN: No, take your time.

TRAVIS: Yeah, we're all figuring it out.

SAM: 40 points of damage.

MATT: Nice.

LIAM: Boy. Boy.

MATT: Woo. All righty. Are you staying put or are you?

SAM: Probably knows I'm there. I'll just bonus action shoot again.

MATT: Go for it.

SAM: This one's a 18 to hit.

MATT: 18 misses.

SAM: Ooh.

MATT: Or more so it hits its hide, and does not penetrate more than like half an inch, and then just sticks out before wobbling and falling to the ground. (crashing) No effect.

SAM: And then I will-- I guess I have some movement. I'm between the two cages, right?

MATT: You are, yes.

SAM: Can I just-- Can I use half my movement to, like, climb up on the side of the cage?

MATT: If you want to.

SAM: Yeah, sure.

MATT: All right. That's easy.

SAM: I don't know if I'll make it all the way up, but.

MATT: It'll get you to the top and that'll be your movement, I'll say.

SAM: That's great.

MATT: About a 12-foot cage.

TRAVIS: You can give him nine hit points back I was looking at the wrong thing.

MATT: Oh, good to know.

TRAVIS: Yep.

MATT: Okay, perfect. All right, so does that finish your turn, Veth?

SAM: Yes, it does.

MATT: At the end of your turn, it's going to use one of its legendary actions.

LAURA: Oh no.

MATT: As it's stomping through, you're watching, it's taking the hits and still reeling from the impact. It looks around, it is horrifying, but also looks confused and a little like--

LAURA: Oh, does it have a baby mind?

MATT: It just looks confused and angrily spins back in this direction.

LAURA: It looks scary as balls, y'all.

MATT: And it's just going to use its grasping arms.

SAM and MARISHA: Grasping arms?

MATT: Yes. Because you are stunned, you automatically fail on the strength save. So Beauregard, as it spins around, the cluster of human arms that are constantly reaching and grasping for whatever's nearby, three of them grab, pull you and start holding you near the side of its mouth. And you are now currently grappled by the creature.

TRAVIS: Okay, all right.

ASHLEY: Okay, okay.

TRAVIS: Maybe it just wants to cuddle.

MATT: That brings us to the top of the round. Yasha.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: You are no longer stunned the top of your round.

ASHLEY: Wait, do I roll a wisdom? You can do that, or you can try and avert your gaze now that you know the effect it can have on you.

ASHLEY: I'm going to avert my gaze.

MATT: Okay, so you do not take--

ASHLEY: I'm afraid roll wisdom.

MATT: You don't take the wisdom save. You're good. However, you have to keep your eyes closed. So you're considered blinded for this entire round.

ASHLEY: Fuck, okay. Okay. I don't know what the right thing to do is here.

TALIESIN: Is blinded just disadvantage on attacks?

MATT: Blinded is disadvantage on attacks and automatically fail any ability check that requires sight, and attack rolls against her have advantage.

ASHLEY: Interesting.

LIAM: Oof, oof, oof.

MATT: You are still prone, by the way.

ASHLEY: --wisdom saving throw. Say again?

MATT: You still are prone by the way.

TRAVIS: So you've got to get up.

LIAM: Suggesting.

ASHLEY: Okay, so I am going to, just from the ground. Oh fuck.

MATT: What are you doing?

ASHLEY: Okay, so I'm going to try to stand up and--

MATT: Half your movement to get back up on your feet.

TRAVIS: What's your total movement speed?

ASHLEY: 50.

MATT: So 25 feet of movement still.

MATT: Okay, so. Can I try to sort of pull Beau out of there?

MATT: If you want to make an opposed grapple check with the creature, yeah.

ASHLEY: Oh.

SAM: Blind Yasha versus the baby.

ASHLEY: That's at disadvantage?

MATT: Because you are blinded, yeah.

ASHLEY: Because I'm blinded.

TALIESIN: Wouldn't rage un--?

MATT: Rage gives you an advantage, so it'd be just a straight roll.

ASHLEY: Yeah, so I'm going to rage now that I'm standing.

TRAVIS: Yes, you are.

ASHLEY: Okay, and--

MATT: No, it automatically fails ability check that requires sight, but it doesn't require sight if you know loosely where she is. If that's what you want to do, it's your call.

ASHLEY: You know what I'm going to try to-- I'm going to try to cut off this dangly bit. Yeah, I'm going to try to cut off the dangly bit.

MARISHA: Fuck yes.

MATT: Okay, all right.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: So.

TRAVIS: Just like Starship Troopers.

ASHLEY: That's a natural 18.

MATT: Well, here's the thing. You have disadvantage on attacks because you said you were--

ASHLEY: Raging?

TALIESIN: With raging.

MATT: Rage doesn't give you advantage on attacks. Rage gives you bonus to damage.

ASHLEY: So, but I have, okay, let me do it again.

LAURA: Come on, big money.

ASHLEY: So bad. That would be 11.

MATT: 11.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: You go to swing towards it and it just goes wide. As it's moving around now, it's looking like it's both confused and angry and hungry and it's just like a wild animal. You don't know what's going to happen. As you swing with your blade for your first strike, it just moves out of the way and it finds nothing.

ASHLEY: I'm going to try again.

MATT: Go for it.

ASHLEY: Okay.

LIAM: You smell that pain in the air?

ASHLEY: That would be a 22.

ASHLEY: With disadvantage, don't forget.

ASHLEY: With disadvantage, damn it. That's a natural one. (groaning)

SAM: That do wild magic?

LIAM: No, it's not.

MATT: It's just a physical attack. While you are not stunned by the lure at front of its head, in keeping your eyes closed to be pulled in. You're just swinging wild in the air and not able to find purchase with your weapon, unfortunately.

ASHLEY: It's like being back at a birthday party trying to hit the dumb piñata.

MATT: I know.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: That finish your turn or you want to move? You still have 25 feet of movement, if you want.

MARISHA: Right.

ASHLEY: I'm just trying to figure out if I should move or if I should stay.

LAURA: That's amazing.

TALIESIN: Remind me, does stun drop concentration?

MATT: It does.

TALIESIN: Okay. Good.

MATT: I had to learn that from research and the internet yelling at me going, "It does that!" I'm like, "You're right."

ASHLEY: I will stay?

MATT: Okay. That finishes your turn. Okay. At the end of your turn, it's going to use its other two legendary actions to attempt a swallow strike on the grappled Beauregard.

TRAVIS: (yelling) Oh no, you're getting swallowed?! Don't do it! Woo!

LIAM: That baby's going to eat all the glizzies. (laughter)

MATT: That is a 21 to hit.

MARISHA: 21's my AC.

MATT: Oh shit. Yeah, that'll do it. All right. So first the hands fold you over. You're being rolled over as they grab and pull you into its mouth, the jaws close in. As you begin to regain your senses, all you see are these two fleshy walls of teeth close around you like a horrible, organic iron maiden. And as it does, you take--

LIAM: They've fire brigaded her.

TRAVIS: Real bad in there, you guys.

MATT: 22 points of piercing damage.

TALIESIN: And?

MATT: Plus 19 points of acid damage.

LIAM: Oh my god.

LAURA: Is Beau going to die? Is Beau going to die? Is Beau going to die?!

MATT: And you are swallowed.

TALIESIN: Fuck.

MATT: You guys watch as the mouth closes around, the neck pulses with muscular tension, and as the mouth opens once more, Beauregard is no longer within its jaws. So that brings us to--

SAM: No more-egard.

MATT: -- Beau's turn.

MARISHA: No mo'-regard? Oh no. (sad laughter)

MATT: Well, Beau-- Beau, here's the good news. You can't see the lure. So you're not stunned by it.

MARISHA: Great news. Silver lining right here. Yeah.

TALIESIN: Goddamn it.

MATT: The bad news is--

MARISHA: Now I'm just sane as I'm being swallowed.

TALIESIN: Oh god, how bad is it going to be?

MATT: Actually, it rolled pretty badly.

TALIESIN: Oh, thank god.

SAM: Babies poop, like, five times a day.

MARISHA: Yeah, you're right. High metabolism.

SAM and MARISHA: Yeah.

ASHLEY: Yeah. Ace Ventura your way out.

MATT: You take 15 points of acid damage from the--

MARISHA: Wait, what? Again, why?

MATT: -- from being within its stomach, as you are now being digested. But it's your turn. You can do what you want freely.

SAM: Does that kill you?

TRAVIS and LAURA: No.

MARISHA: 16 points?

TRAVIS: It's getting real gnarly, though?

TALIESIN: 15 or 16?

MATT: 15, I believe.

TALIESIN: 15.

MARISHA: 15?

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MARISHA: I have 11 hit points left.

MATT: Oh shit. Okay.

LAURA: So if she doesn't get out by her next turn, she's dead on her next one.

SAM: She's got--

MATT: She's unconscious. She's got, she's got a plan. This is Beauregard we're--

TRAVIS: Don't you duck face, Matthew! You're married to that!

SAM: She can do monk shit! Crazy monk shit. Just do some crazy monk shit.

LIAM: Reach your hand out of that thing's mouth. Get your hand out.

MARISHA: Can I hit? What can I do? Can I hit him? Am I--

MATT: You can punch from the inside. You can do all kinds of things. You can still try and fight your way out. If you do enough damage to it in one round, it may regurgitate you.

MARISHA: Okay.

MATT: But you are restrained so your attacks do have disadvantage because you're currently within its body.

TRAVIS: Oh boy.

LAURA: What about--

MARISHA: Okay.

TRAVIS: Maybe it'll puke you up, man. Remember the kraken? Hey! Remember the kraken? That's how we got it to-- It started puking us up every time I'd be like--

MARISHA: Yeah, with damage.

TRAVIS: I was doing the Drax shit.

MARISHA: I probably couldn't light a spark in here, right? Probably a little too damp to light something.

SAM: Firework action?

MARISHA: Yeah.

LAURA: What about your gauntlets? Would your electric gauntlets light a spark?

MARISHA: That's a good point. If I use my electric gauntlets and I'm inside of it, would I take electric damage?

MATT: Probably not, but who knows? You can try.

SAM: Acid's pretty conducive.

MARISHA: I got 10 hit points left, I don't want to try. Okay. Okay.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

MARISHA: Okay.

ASHLEY: Ugh, I have ungrappled you.

LIAM: Oh shit. Shit.

MARISHA: Okay. Okay. Okay.

TRAVIS: Yeah?

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: Oh, I don't know, I have no idea if that will work.

MATT: Caduceus, you're on deck.

TRAVIS: Nobody does.

TALIESIN: Fuck off.

TRAVIS: Nobody does.

LAURA: You can do it, Beau. You can do it.

MARISHA: Who knows if this would even work.

TALIESIN: I'm not built for this right now. Okay. Should've a breakfast. We're going to get our asses...

MARISHA: Oh my god. This is dumb. I'm going to be really mad if this doesn't work. Can I reach for my equipment? Can I pull something out?

MATT: What are you trying to pull out?

MARISHA: Pouch?

MATT: Just a pouch?

MARISHA: Uh-huh.

MATT: Sure. Okay.

MARISHA: It's my pouch of suude.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: And I think I have, like, 10 doses.

MATT: Are you going to take drugs for your final moments?

MARISHA: No. Can I dump it out in his stomach?

LAURA: (gasps)

MARISHA: Because you have to, like, after a certain amount of dosage, it gets really hard to save from that, right?

MATT: Yeah.

MARISHA: To like-- Is that a good idea?

MATT: Give it a shot. Try it out.

TRAVIS: Its metabolism has to be super fast.

LAURA: You're giving drugs to a baby.

TRAVIS: Doesn't it take like 30 minutes to kick in?

MATT: No, this is.

MARISHA: I don't know. It's magic drugs. It's really powerful magic drugs.

LIAM: It's fucking awesome. It's great.

ASHLEY: I love it.

MARISHA: I have 10 doses.

LAURA: Use it all.

MARISHA: And I'm going to dump the whole package into his stomach.

MATT: All right. That'll be your action this turn.

MARISHA: Uh-huh.

LIAM: Super fucking creative.

MARISHA: That might be a terrible idea.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: What's the effect?

MARISHA: It's like if you have one dose, it adds to your sorcerer point damage. But I think with each additional hit you have to roll on a table.

MATT: Do you have noted what color it was?

LAURA: What color the suude was?

MARISHA: What color? I just have "suude" written down. It was that giant pouch of suude that I made sure Veth got back for me from Vokodo. I've had it since like the beginning of the game.

SAM: It's not like PCP that's going to make this thing, a killing machine, right?

MARISHA: I think I stole this from The Gentlemen or something. (laughter)

LAURA: You might've made it stronger.

LIAM: She's about to die. Of course she would try anything.

MATT: I don't have the specific details or anything or what color it was. There are three different colors of suude. So we'll just say brown suude.

SAM: Sure.

MARISHA: Do you remember? What are the colors?

MATT: The colors were brown, red and blue, I believe.

TALIESIN: Oh boy.

MATT: So.

MARISHA: I feel like it was, I don't know. Maybe, look, maybe you have it.

MATT: Let me look at the rules for suude real fast. Give me just a second.

SAM: There's suude rules? Did you make these suude rules?

MATT: I did.

SAM: Wow.

MARISHA: It was a bunch...

SAM: Suude Rules, by the way, is the worst Road Rules spinoff. (laughter)

LAURA: Jeez louise.

TRAVIS: Road Rules.

SAM: Road Rules.

TRAVIS: Oh man.

SAM: I don't think I ever actually watched that show.

LAURA: Is Road Rules when--

SAM: It was a spinoff of Real World.

LAURA: Road Rules was the-- okay. The Real World was the very first reality show. Right?

TRAVIS: Real World vs. Road Rules.

MARISHA: Somebody. I stole this from someone's stash and it was really good, expensive shit. So I don't know what that means.

MATT: So yeah. So it has to be a constitution saving throw to maintain consciousness. And for each dose they take within an hour of the original dose, the DC goes up by three and it's 10 doses. So that is a DC, a 37 DC,

LIAM: That's an auto-kill.

MATT: Just going to roll for fun.

SAM: Does it--

MATT: It fails with a natural one, hilariously. (laughter)

MARISHA: Babies have a low tolerance to drugs.

SAM: I learned that the hard way. (laughter)

MATT: ♪ The more you know. ♪

TRAVIS: Babies have a low tolerance to drugs.

TALIESIN: It's just whiskey in a bottle.

MATT: Oh no, no.

SAM: Come on, hold your shit. (laughter)

MARISHA: This is conditioning. (snapping fingers)

LAURA: So what does it do?

LIAM: I feel like I better say: Please don't give your baby drugs.

LAURA: Yeah, don't give your baby drugs.

SAM: Do we need to do that PSA right now?

TALIESIN: We're saying no, right now.

SAM: Please don't give your baby drugs.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

SAM: That's fair.

MATT: Now the rules for suude are based on a human physiology.

SAM: Oh, okay, okay.

MARISHA: Sure, sure.

MATT: So. This is definitely not a human.

LIAM: That's fair. That's fair.

MATT: And this definitely would not suffer the extreme consequences that a suude overdose would necessarily. So.

MARISHA: It rolled a one.

MATT: I did roll one. So it is going unconscious for 2d4 rounds.

MARISHA: For 2d4.

SAM: 2d4 rounds.

LAURA: Oh wow!

MARISHA: Is he going to barf me up?

MATT: No, but somebody has to pull you out Which can happen when it's unconscious or unable to respond. So.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: (growling)

LIAM: I was wrong. There is a cheat code.

MATT: Falls onto its side, unconscious. (laughter)

MARISHA: Help!

LAURA: Do you have to roll for how long it stays?

SAM: Beau must taste like shit.

LAURA: What did she do?

MARISHA: I'm a hard pill to swallow.

MATT: Three rounds.

LAURA and MARISHA: Three rounds?

MATT: Two and a one, but.

MARISHA: A two and a one? Okay.

LAURA: That's still huge.

MARISHA: Okay. Okay. Okay.

ASHLEY: Even if we attack him?

SAM: 18 seconds to pull her out of there.

MATT: You'll find out.

TALIESIN: I'm going to-- you've got a dupe there and you're strong. I'm going to hold my turn to heal Beau. When I can see Beau.

SAM: I'm going to jump down and rush over to help.

LAURA: But you can't do anything physical. She can only cast spells.

SAM: Then I'm going to go in and I'm going to dive in the mouth.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: Can we tell-- will we know, like--

LIAM: But we're out of sequence.

LAURA: Can we tell the baby is unconscious?

MATT: We're still doing sequence here.

TALIESIN: In that case--

LAURA: Okay. So Beau could--

TALIESIN: I'm going to hold my heal.

SAM: Hold my heal.

MARISHA: Okay.

TALIESIN: Because, worst case scenario, even if you're unconscious--

MARISHA: Okay.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

TRAVIS: I mean, it's unconscious. They're autocrits, right?

LAURA: She's not unconscious.

TRAVIS: No, no. The thing's unconscious.

LAURA: Yeah, we get autocrits against baby. Within five feet, a melee attack is an autocrit against an unconscious creature.

TALIESIN: Well, we'll be-- Beau, and then.

SAM: Get over there.

LAURA: Okay, yeah.

MATT: Caduceus, you're holding a-- what spell?

TALIESIN: I'm holding a-- Eh, where'd it go? Sorry. I'm losing my mind. Where'd it go? I'm losing-- I'm holding a Heal spell.

MATT: Oh, Heal? Okay, got it.

LIAM: Me.

MATT: Caleb, you're up next.

LIAM: I pull out the lodestone and grip it in my arm with a finger full of dust. I just let the drift globe float. And I'm holding my turn for when I see Beauregard out of the baby, and I will cast Disintegrate once Beauregard is out of the baby.

MATT: You've got it. Okay. Just double-checking here for-- I'm pretty sure. And I think I've forgotten in the past, too. Holding a spell while you're holding it. It does become a concentration spell, even if it's instantaneous.

TALIESIN: Oh, I'll drop that shit.

MATT: So it'll drop your thing. Just so you know.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: Okay. And you are also back no longer invisible.

TALIESIN: Nope.

MATT: There you go.

LAURA: Oh, that's what that was. I was like, "There's a crystal in the--"

TALIESIN: Thank you.

MATT: All right. So that finished the Caduceus' turn. Caleb's turn. You're both holding spells. Jester, you're up.

LAURA: I have a question.

MATT: Yeah.

LAURA: Is his eye dangles still bright, or did it dim?

MATT: No, it's still bright.

TRAVIS: It's still bright.

MATT: Yeah. Nothing happened to that.

SAM: Does that mean we have to roll for wisdom to save?

MATT: Whoever's closest to it, maybe. Depending.

SAM: Okay. Okay.

MATT: Which, actually, to that point, before-- because I need to keep track of that since the light is still up. Could I have both Caduceus and Caleb roll wisdom saving rolls?

TRAVIS: What's the radius on the light?

MATT: You don't know.

TALIESIN: 14.

MATT: 14 is exactly what you needed.

LIAM: 25.

MATT: 25. So you guys continue your turns. You're fine.

TALIESIN: Please, someone pull her out of there.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: All right. So Jester.

LAURA: I don't know if I can get all the way up to the baby.

LIAM: We're a ways away from that thing.

ASHLEY: I'm right there, so I can--

LAURA: I'm going to take my coat off and run towards the baby and hold it up in front of my eye. Like, hold it up in front of my face to try to block the light of the thingy as I'm running towards it.

MATT: Okay. Put you about there, I'll say.

TALIESIN: Double run?

LAURA: Yeah. I'm going to double dash if I can.

MATT: Double dash. Okay. So you're going right up next to it?

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: ♪ Double, double your refreshment. ♪

TRAVIS: Shit.

SAM: What are you holding there?

LAURA: My coat.

TALIESIN: If you can get all the way, are you going to--?

LAURA: I don't think I can get all the way.

MATT: You cannot get all the way.

LAURA: Okay. Yeah. My goal is to cover up the the eyeball thing with my coat as he lays there.

MATT: Okay. That finishes Jester's go. It's now its turn. It can't do anything, as it is unconscious. However, it does get a save to try and see if it can get back up.

LAURA: (gasps)

MATT: It does not.

SAM: Oh.

MATT: All right. That brings us to Fjord. Veth, you're on deck.

TALIESIN: If you can get there real quick, that'd be great.

TRAVIS: Yeah. I mean, I can, but if I get there and I fail a wisdom save, I'm just a mannequin.

TALIESIN: That's fair.

TRAVIS: Because of the position he's laying in, is the light lying in front of his face? So his ass would obscure the light, or is it a--?

MATT: One way to find out.

TRAVIS: Got to find out. Fuck it, there's nothing else to do. All right. I'm going to use my 30 feet of movement to come towards him as far as I can.

MATT: 30 right there.

TRAVIS: And I'm going to use my-- what the hell's it called? My Relentless Hex to teleport 30 feet right up on his anus.

MATT: There you go. If you want to, you can go ahead and be there.

TRAVIS: Yeah, whatever is puts him between me and the light.

MATT: You got it.

TRAVIS: Do I have to roll a wisdom save?

MATT: You do not right now.

TRAVIS: Okay.

MATT: Because it is prone, unconscious, and from a logistic standpoint, right now you cannot see the source of the light.

TRAVIS: Should I just try and hit it?

LAURA: Just hit it right now. Hit it.

TRAVIS: Okay. Fuck it. I'm going to-- I'm going to take--

LAURA: Use your [Inaudible]!

TRAVIS: I know! I'm going to use-- I'm going to take a swipe with the Star Razor.

MATT: Yeah. Go for it.

TRAVIS: Which is a natural. It's an instant crit, right?

MATT: As long as you-- Let me see here.

LAURA: As long as you hit it.

MATT: You have advantage on the attack roll, and as long as you hit it, it's an automatic crit.

TRAVIS: That's a natural 19, which is already a crit.

MARISHA: But see if you can get a 20.

LAURA: Oh, it doesn't matter.

TRAVIS: I crit on 19 or 20.

MATT: Yeah.

TRAVIS: And the second one, let's just do the first one.

TALIESIN: Yeah. Just take it,

TRAVIS: I'm going to pump a 5th-level Divine Smite into that.

MATT: Jesus Christ, go for it.

LIAM: This is going to be massive.

TRAVIS: Okay. (squealing) Okay. Okay. Where the fuck is that thing? Divine Smite.

TRAVIS: He's missing his chance to pull you out of its anus like Ace Ventura, though.

TRAVIS: Yeah, you assume I could even do that.

MARISHA: But he could have ten miles--

LAURA: But I don't think you can reach the stomach from his butt.

TALIESIN: There might be three other people in there.

MARISHA: There could be 3 other people in there?

TALIESIN: Just waiting.

TRAVIS: It's a max of 5d8, not 6d8 because it's not undead or anything?

MATT: Correct.

SAM: It looks scarier on its side.

TRAVIS: 6d...

TALIESIN: I can just see into the mouth.

TRAVIS: I should do the ten first. Jesus, I'm from freaking the fuck out.

MARISHA: My heart is pounding.

TRAVIS: 18, okay.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

TRAVIS: I just broke that.

SAM: We're just baby crazy. (laughter)

MARISHA: That's one way of putting it.

LIAM: It's just like we planned it. Let it swallow Beau, who murders her from the inside. Everybody piles up.

MARISHA: I was saving that suude to maybe assassinate a member of the Cerberus Assembly, but this works.

LIAM: Right.

SAM: Sure.

TRAVIS: So that's 40, 40 points of damage, doubled.

SAM: You could OD on it.

MATT: For the dice. Modifiers aren't doubled.

MARISHA: He was making you roll for that shit--

TRAVIS: All right. So.

MARISHA: -- for Scanlan.

TRAVIS: So it'll just be 35 points, doubled.

MATT: So 70 plus modifiers.

TRAVIS: 75.

MATT: 75.

TRAVIS: On the first hit.

LAURA: On the first hit.

MATT: Okay, that's a lot of damage.

TRAVIS: Okay. I'll take the second swipe.

MATT: Go for it. The shock of pain does awaken it from its unconsciousness.

LIAM: There it is.

TRAVIS: Okay. Okay. Okay.

MATT: So it's still prone. So you still have advantage on attacks, but the second one is not a crit.

SAM: It's like that--

TRAVIS: Oh, it's so close again. 18. Plus, plus 10. Yeah.

MATT: That hits.

TRAVIS: Okay.

MARISHA: Really hoping it would do more than that.

MATT: Yeah, the suude rules are based on a humanoid creature.

TRAVIS: Should I just dump it? Should I just dump it?

LAURA: Yeah, at this point dump it.

TRAVIS: I'm going to dump the other 5th-level Divine Smite into it. Okay.

MATT: Go for it.

TALIESIN: It just might do enough damage to get him to throw you up. Maybe?

MATT: Well, the damage has to be from the inside to get it to throw up.

TALIESIN: Out of idle curiosity. I can't change targets if it's rolling close to the end of my run.

LAURA: Hey, at least, you know what--

TALIESIN: Can I switch if I'm about to burn?

LAURA: At least it was just the baby's turn. So we get all of our--

TALIESIN: As long as I'm casting and I just don't see if I could just like, if a spell's coming.

MATT: I'd allow it.

TALIESIN: All right. Thank you.

LAURA: But he does probably get legendary actions.

SAM: Throw a bunch of healing potions into its mouth and hope that one lands on Beau.

LAURA: Hits Beau? That's smart.

TRAVIS: 43 points of damage.

MATT: Damn! (laughter) All righty.

TRAVIS: 43, so.

MATT: That finish your turn, Fjord?

TRAVIS: Yes.

MATT: All right.

LIAM: Pull her out.

MATT: Veth, you're up.

TRAVIS: It was 113.

SAM: I guess I'm going to try to pull her out.

LAURA: Oh god, baby's awake.

MATT: Actually no, because it-- it did get its legendary actions back on its turn even though it was unconscious. At the end of Fjord's turn, since there's not much else it can really do at the moment.

LIAM: Oh god.

MATT: It's going to use one legendary action to-- because it just can't use that because it's prone-- to grasping arms strike against you, Yasha.

ASHLEY: Okay.

LIAM: Maybe you'll be together.

MARISHA: We all float down here.

SAM: Oh boy.

ASHLEY and MATT: (chuckle)

MATT: I will say, because you are technically still blinded, since you didn't look at the lure last time and it's right in front of you still. It says it automatically fails any ability check that requires sight. I will say, because you're a crazy barbarian who's raging. And are you, at this point [inaudible] I'll let you roll against it to see if you can resist. So go ahead and roll a strength saving throw for me with disadvantage.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: Which you have-- Well, not-- yeah, saving throw. Do you have advantage in strength saving throws while raging, or is it just ability checks?

ASHLEY: Just dex. I have advantage on the saving throw.

MATT: Right, but for when you're raging, is it just ability checks or is it--?

ASHLEY: Oh, oh, oh, oh, sorry, sorry, sorry.

MATT: It's okay.

ASHLEY: Let me check.

SAM: Double check.

ASHLEY: Gain advantage on, yeah, strength checks and saving throws.

MATT: So yeah. So it would just be a straight roll, so whatever you roll.

ASHLEY: Okay. That would be 21.

MATT: 21? You are not grappled. (various sounds of relief)

SAM: Oh, nice.

MATT: You feel the arms pull at you, and as you do, you just shrug them off and put the blade in front even though with your eyes closed, you sensed where they were coming and managed to keep them at bay.

LAURA: That was such a Jedi.

ASHLEY: Yeah. (whooshing)

MATT: All right. Very cool. Now it's Veth's turn and then we'll be at the top of the round after that.

ASHLEY: Okay.

SAM: I will jump down and run over there. How much? Hi. Can I get there?

MATT: Well, first, I need you to make a wisdom saving throw.

SAM: Sure, sure. Easy enough, 19.

MATT: 19? You're fine.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: (chuckling) What are you doing?

SAM: I'm going to run over to its gullet, its toothy maw. (laughter)

LIAM: Go get him, Brenatto.

MARISHA: Ugh.

LAURA: Oh god.

LAURA: It goes so poorly.

MARISHA: I know.

SAM: So before I dive in--

MATT: Yeah?

SAM: Have I used all my movement... and what do I need to do to get in?

MATT: 25 feet you've used.

SAM: Okay. Do I need to-- is it movement to get in? Is it an action to get in?

MATT: It is an action to reach in and try and resist to pull the creature out. So that'll be the end of your movement. You won't be able to pull her away from it, but she'll be out of it.

LIAM: Yeah.

SAM: And--

LIAM: You're right there.

SAM: -- can I drink a potion as a bonus action?

MARISHA: While jogging?

MATT: With all that you're trying to do on this round? I'd say no.

SAM: That's okay.

MATT: Yeah. You're doing a lot this round.

SAM: Sure, sure, sure. I'm just not the strongest person.

TALIESIN: Just roll well.

SAM: Yeah, I'll just roll well, guys.

TALIESIN: Man, it's so simple.

MATT: I mean, that's D&D.

LAURA: Just roll a fucking 20.

SAM: Bless?

LAURA: I can't--

SAM: I'm going to bless myself. (laughter) That's what you do, you touch your heart.

MATT: All right. So you're trying to push in and grab a hold of Beauregard.

SAM: I'm going to reach in and pull.

MATT: All right. So it's easy for you enough to get inside. And you can see, like, pushing past the teeth as they scrape, as you squeeze your way in. And it's this horrible, gnarled flesh flaps that you have to pull apart and squeeze in. And as you push your way in your feet are just sticking out. You guys watch as Veth almost entirely vanishes, actually the only person who sees this would be you, but you don't see that because you're blind. Nobody sees this. You remember this. (laughter) This is what the mind's eye of the audience sees. Is Veth's feet kicking as you reach in--

ASHLEY: What's happening?

MATT: -- as Beauregard is currently--

SAM: I'm going to yell: I'm going in! As I dive in.

MATT: There you go. You do find Beauregard's arm. I need you to make a contested strength check.

SAM: Strength check against a baby? How hard could it be?

TRAVIS: You got this.

LAURA: Natural 20.

SAM: Just my strength?

MATT: Just your strength. Add your strength modifier.

SAM: 12. (groaning)

MATT: That does not succeed.

SAM: (yelling) It's not moving!

MATT: The good news is--

MARISHA: Veth!

MATT: The good news is you got 113 points of additional damage from Fjord's turn. The bad news is it woke it up and now it can resist being pulled out.

SAM: No problem, no problem.

MATT: But you are now--

SAM: Sure.

MATT: -- prone, and partially in its mouth.

SAM: Sure. I'm holding on real tight.

MATT: Okay. You got it. That finishes your turn. Yasha, you're up.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: Are you-- Are you keeping your eyes closed or are you going to risk the wisdom save?

ASHLEY: (sighs) Wisdom save.

MATT: Go for it. Make the roll.

SAM: You got to look.

ASHLEY: I got to look.

SAM: You don't know what the fuck's going on. You just heard me run by you. And it's crazy.

MARISHA: Come on, please. Natural 19.

LIAM: Yes! (cheering)

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: With your penalty, it brings it to?

ASHLEY: 20.

MATT: There we go, just making sure.

ASHLEY: Plus one.

MATT: Resisted. You're good. What are you doing?

ASHLEY: Okay, okay, okay.

MARISHA: I might live.

ASHLEY: All right, all right, all right. Well, now I got to pull both of you guys out. So let me--

MARISHA: Do I have your arms? Do I see Veth? Do I see a little--

MATT: Yeah, Veth is holding your arm. You don't see anything right now, but you feel Veth grabbing onto you, and you can just barely make out that there is somebody trying to get you out of it.

MARISHA: Okay. I'm full on gripping Veth's arms.

MATT: You got it.

ASHLEY: Okay. So real quick.

SAM: Hope you don't slip!

ASHLEY: Because I'm so angry, I'm also going to let out a battle cry.

MATT: Okay.

ASHLEY: So everybody, you know, you get advantages on attack rolls and saving throws.

MATT: Awesome.

TALIESIN: That's a bonus action?

ASHLEY: Bonus action. And then I'm going to just reach in and try to pull Veth's ankles, hips, something. Anything I can grab to try to pull them all out.

MATT: As you grab Veth's feet, go ahead and make a strength check with advantage because you are raging and because you are eyes open on this.

LIAM: That halfling over there.

ASHLEY: Nice. Okay.

LAURA: Wait, advantage, advantage?

ASHLEY: Plus advantage. Whew. Thank goodness. I rolled a one and an 18. So 28.

MATT: You had to beat a 22.

TRAVIS: (whooping)

MARISHA: A 22.

MATT: So as you reach and grab, you put your feet up against the side and pull on Veth's legs and in a full-on-- a sight that you can only imagine, you pull both the halfling, Veth, and your friend, Beauregard, from the gullet of this terrifying abomination, leaving both Veth and Beauregard prone on the ground, but not within its stomach

TALIESIN: And boom!

MARISHA: (gasping)

TALIESIN: Boom goes my dynamite.

TRAVIS: Yes. Just your--

LIAM: Healing and death.

TALIESIN: 70 points.

MATT: You heal 70 hit points.

MARISHA: 70 points?

LAURA: And you were holding Disintegrate.

LIAM: Disintegrate goes off.

MATT: Yes, it does.

TRAVIS: Fucking awesome.

ASHLEY: Come on!

SAM: We reverse birthed a baby. (laughter)

TALIESIN: It's a teammate!

MATT: All righty. And what's what's the save against it?

LIAM: Dex.

MATT: Dex? Okay. Not great at them. All right. It will use one of its legendary saves to succeed.

LIAM: Oh, so no damage.

MATT: No damage.

LIAM: It goes shy or bounces off.

TRAVIS: Wow.

MARISHA: What level were you trying to do?

LIAM: 6th-level.

TRAVIS: Nuke.

LIAM: I wasn't going to go higher. It's better to do it twice.

TRAVIS: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

LIAM: Up one.

MATT: Yeah. All righty.

LIAM: Fuck.

MARISHA: Lame.

MATT: Beauregard, it's your turn.

MARISHA: (deep sigh) Okay.

TALIESIN: Actually, we're together. Can I go first?

MARISHA: Oh, yeah.

TALIESIN: Just 'cause?

MATT: Sure.

TALIESIN: All right. Since we're both--

MATT: Well, I will--

TALIESIN: Oh, your dex is higher.

MATT: Her dex is higher, and I usually go with that circumstance. And since you guys aren't coordinating because she literally just got pulled out of the inside the creature, she wouldn't know to wait. So, Beauregard, go for it.

MARISHA: Okay. Dripping stomach acid and bile. Super pissed off. Stand up, pull out my staff and I'm going to just start trying to gouge its eyes out.

MATT: Go for it.

LAURA: Do you have to make a wisdom save at the beginning of your turn?

MATT: You do.

SAM: Oh, balls.

MATT: Unless you want to avert your gaze.

LIAM: Yeah, you do. You got like 50 hits.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Your call. Do you want to risk the wisdom save, or do you want to choose to keep your eyes closed and be blind for the rest of the turn?

MARISHA: Well, I also have attacks on all saving throws right now, right?

MATT: You have advantage on all saving throws.

MARISHA: This is a saving throw, right?

MATT: Correct.

MARISHA: So I'll do it. I'll risk it.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: Realistically, I just roll above a 10. I rolled a natural 19 on that one, and that one's gone, but that's a 19.

MATT: You got it. Okay.

MARISHA: Okay. Okay.

MATT: So I imagine you get up first. It's right in your face. Literally. It's, like, shining and you're like, "Get out of the way!" and just go to town on this.

MARISHA: Yeah. Just full on my grip goes around my staff and I just battle baseball swing at its face.

MATT: Go for it.

MARISHA: Okay. First attack. 27.

MATT: That hits.

MARISHA: Second-- second attack. Natural 20.

MATT: All right.

MARISHA: So first attack.

TRAVIS: What's for dinner.

MARISHA: 14 damage.

MATT: 14 damage.

MARISHA: Second attack. Please be an eight. It's an eight! 18 damage. (laughter)

TALIESIN: All of these are advantage, too.

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

TALIESIN: Fuck, I'm sorry.

MATT: Wait, so you rolled an eight. So it's doubled to 16, plus your--

MARISHA: Plus... Oh, you're right. 16. That's technically 28. I'm wrong. Not 18, 28.

MATT: Not 28. What was the full modifier on it?

MARISHA: Sorry. Sorry. Plus 10. So 27.

MATT: Plus 10 damage?

MARISHA: Yeah, on my Belaborer, because it gives me a plus two to my attack and damage.

MATT: Correct. And then you have five for your dex. That's plus seven, right?

MARISHA: Yeah. Well, then why is that not right?

SAM: But why?

MATT: Double checking the damage on them.

MARISHA: 1d8. Okay. Okay. I was already adding in the damage. I was already adding it in. Okay. Okay. So yes, but I guess my unarmed strikes are what's plus six. Not my staff.

MATT: Well, you can do with the staff attacks, too, but just saying that it's plus five with your dex damage and then whatever the weapon's damage bonus is on top of that, which should be two with Belabor, right?

MARISHA: Yes.

MATT: So it'd be plus seven.

MARISHA: Plus seven.

MATT: Correct, so it'd be 23 damage.

MARISHA: So I was one off on that, 23 damage.

MATT: What would be the first strike, then, that you rolled?

MARISHA: Let me fix that. It would be minus three.

MATT: Okay, gotcha.

MARISHA: Because I was adding this wrong.

MATT: Love it. Okay. Good to fix that now.

LAURA: Mm. Yes. Obviously.

TRAVIS: Carry the one, and--

MATT: All righty. That's your action?

MARISHA: Yeah. I might as well try to Stunning Strike it, I guess, if he's alive.

MATT: Okay, he's alive.

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: He's starting to look rough, guys.

TRAVIS: Don't you lie to us.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: I mean, he looked rough when he showed up.

MATT: True. True. It does not appear to have an effect on it.

MARISHA: It can't be stunned.

MATT: It doesn't seem to have an effect.

TRAVIS: Oh boy.

MARISHA: Okay. Bonus action. Pop pop.

MATT: Go for it.

SAM: You have to do, what is it, the five S's?

MARISHA: Yeah.

SAM: (rhythmic shushing)

MARISHA: Okay. The first one is a 25.

MATT: 25 hits, yeah.

MARISHA: Second one is a 23.

MATT: That hits.

MARISHA: These are-- okay.

SAM: ♪ (sings with background music) ♪

MARISHA: That is the first strike is, lordy. Plus-- is 12 damage and 10 damage. So 22 on that. Flurry of Blows.

MATT: You got it. All right.

MARISHA: And Extract Aspects.

MATT: Okay. Good to know. This creature, of its odd physicality and biology. You sense as you come out of its body both of the experience being inside of it and now being able to connect your chi with whatever its spiritual energy is. You can sense that it is resistant to fire, cold, and lightning.

MARISHA: Resistant to fire, cold, and lightning.

MATT: As well as bludgeoning, slashing, and piercing from nonmagical attacks.

MARISHA: Okay.

MATT: It is immune to acid.

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: And it can not be charmed, stunned or frightened.

MARISHA: Okay. Can't be charmed, stunned, or frightened.

SAM: Just like a baby.

MARISHA: Okay. (chuckling) Charmed, stunned, or frightened. Okay. All right. So I just say like: Avoid elemental shit and stuff that fucks with its head.

LAURA: (whispered) No, it's a wisdom.

MARISHA: It's a wise baby.

MATT: That finish your turn?

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: Caduceus, now you're up.

TALIESIN: Okay.

MATT: Actually, at the end of your turn--

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: -- because I can do that.

SAM: Legendary action.

MARISHA: No!

MATT: It's going to go ahead and attempt-- Yeah. It's going to attempt another grasping arms against Veth.

SAM: Against me?

MATT: Yes.

SAM: No problem.

LAURA: It's got a taste for you, Veth. It wants you back.

SAM: Yeah!

MATT: Because you're right there. So I need you to make a contested athletics or dexterity. Acrobatics check, your choice.

SAM: Oh.

MARISHA: Is this an attack?

SAM: This is a check, save?

MATT: A contested check.

SAM: 20.

MATT: 23. So you are grappled by the arms.

SAM: Wait. Wait.

MATT: Wait.

TALIESIN and LIAM: Wait.

MARISHA: Rogue shit.

SAM: That green A that's next to my acrobatics. I finally looked it up. It says advantage on escape from being grappled. Squat Nimbleness.

MATT: So roll again.

TRAVIS: Yeah!

SAM: 22.

MATT: It's one below. (laughter) But good try! Good try.

TRAVIS: It was one below.

MATT: Yeah. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Shit!

MATT: So Veth, you are grappled by it. All right. That finishes its legendary reaction. Your turn.

TALIESIN: Do I have to make a saving throw or are we cool?

MATT: You are--

TRAVIS: "Or are we cool."

MARISHA: Is that Caduceus talking to the baby?

MATT: You do, unless you choose not to. You do have advantage on it.

TALIESIN: Yeah. I'll take it.

MATT: Go for it.

TALIESIN: I got shit I want to do.

TALIESIN: 18?

MATT: 18 is fine, so you are good.

TALIESIN: Okay. 5, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30. I'm going to step just so that Veth is within 30 feet of me.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: And I'm going to cast... One, two, three, four, one, two, three, four. And I can see Yasha, I believe, over the top of the baby.

MATT: You cannot see Yasha right now.

TALIESIN: Oh, shit. That-- that sucks.

MATT: Yeah, you can only right now see Veth barely, Beauregard, and Jester's duplicate,

TALIESIN: Other than the other kids.

MATT: And the people around you. I mean, as far as that side.

TALIESIN: How far would I have to go to see, uh-- I would have to like step another 10 feet, wouldn't I, to see Yasha?

MATT: Yeah.

TALIESIN: How far have I traveled already?

MATT: 10 feet.

TALIESIN: Okay, I'll step forward until I can see Yasha, which was either five or 10 feet.

MATT: Okay. That'll put you about there.

TALIESIN: Is that 10 feet?

MATT: That'd be technically 15.

TALIESIN: Oh shit.

MATT: Yeah. It's tough. It's blocking your path for the most part.

TALIESIN: Sure. Okay. Fuck it. This is how the game plays. This is how the game works.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: All right. One, two, three, four, five, so-- So I'm going to cast-- one, two, three, four, five, six, seven. I'm going to cast Bless at 5th-level.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: Whoa.

TALIESIN: Everyone gets a... d4 with saving throws.

LIAM: Everybody?

TALIESIN: Everybody.

MATT: Nice.

LIAM: Good, good. And we have advantage on saving throws, right?

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: For this round, yeah.

TALIESIN: d4 to saving throws, d4 to attack rolls.

LIAM: Okay, good.

TALIESIN: And I'm going to take whatever I've got left to back the fuck away from this thing.

MARISHA: Great.

MATT: You've got it.

SAM: Hashtag blessed.

MARISHA: Hashtag blessed, blessed.

TRAVIS: Back yo ass up, Caduceus.

TALIESIN: And, yeah.

ASHLEY: Hell yeah.

MATT: All right, and you're backing up what?

TALIESIN: As far as I can possibly go. I want to get away from that eye. I don't want to see it. I know what it does.

MATT: That's as much as you can get right there with the movement you used, to get close enough to get Yasha in that blast wave, so.

TALIESIN: All right, then I'll-- yeah.

MATT: All right. We'll say that, because I do not have a seventh one that this also represents Bless on you, Veth. All right. That finishes Caduceus' turn. Caleb, you're up. Jester, you're on deck.

LIAM: Okay. So the bless is a d4?

TALIESIN: d4.

LAURA: Yes.

LIAM: d4. Okay. So I have to-- first, I will-- I'm not going to shut my eyes.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: So I'll make the save.

MATT: With advantage, plus a d4 on each of them.

LIAM: Do I roll a d4 for each 20, or for both, or I don't know.

MATT: Just roll one, and then...

LIAM: Fuck. Well, that could do it. 11 plus-- 20.

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah.

MATT: 20? Yeah, that'll do it.

LIAM: I forgot that I get to add nine. Okay. So I will back up 20 feet from this thing, 15 feet, let's say.

MATT: 15 feet there.

LIAM: And I am muttering and moving my hands through the air. And I reach my hand out and focus on the eyeball dangling from its face and try to use Telekinesis to rip it off and throw it down the hall.

SAM: Whoa.

MATT: Okay. Go ahead and roll a d20, adding your intelligence modifier to it.

ASHLEY: Do you get an advantage?

MARISHA: Oh no.

MATT: Not for this one, though.

TRAVIS: Say it.

MARISHA: What is it?

LIAM: It's not-- neither of those things. So adding which?

MATT: Adding your intelligence modifier.

LIAM: 15

MATT: 15. Not strong enough to pull it free from its head. There's tension there. And you feel like if you were to continue to try, this is definitely possible, but right now with everything that's going on you're just having a hard time focusing and concentrating on it from the distance you're at and how much movement is between you and the creature. But you're trying, you're trying you're trained onto it. The rest of you watch as its floppy dangler is now taut, and being pulled like it's on the edge of a fishing line.

MARISHA: Oh, hi, I'm Floppy Danglers.

LAURA: Ooh, I'm Floppy Dangler.

MARISHA: (laughs)

MATT: All right. That finishes your go, Caleb?

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: All right. Jester, you're up.

LAURA: Okay. I'm going to cast, because this is an attack sort of thing, a Guiding Bolt at fifth level.

MARISHA: Up the butt.

MATT: Go for it. You do have an advantage on the attack because of Yasha.

LAURA: Whoa, that was way cocked.

MATT: Well, actually at the top of your turn, I need you to go ahead and make a wisdom saving throw, or...

TRAVIS: Avert your gaze.

LAURA: I should reroll. I shouldn't go based on the twenties I just rolled. Right?

MATT: Correct. But first, roll your wisdom saving throw with advantage because you do have her thing.

LAURA: Right. That's what I did. So seven plus-- eight plus 10, 18?

MATT: 18 is fine.

LAURA: Okay. So should I reroll my--

MATT: Now you reroll your d20s for the attack.

LAURA: Okay. It was really good before and that sucks because this is not as good as what I--

TALIESIN: You also get a d4.

LAURA: Huh?

TALIESIN: Attacks get a d4, too.

MATT: Yeah.

LAURA: Sure. But... 11 plus 10, 21.

MATT: That hits.

LAURA: All right, so that's 8d6. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.

TALIESIN: This thing's fucking scary, man.

MATT: That suude fucked up its action economy pretty bad.

MARISHA: It better. That was good drugs.

TRAVIS: Don't do drugs, kids.

MARISHA: Don't do drugs.

TRAVIS: Just carry them on you at all times in lethal dosages.

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah.

LAURA: 33 points of Guiding Bolt radiant damage.

LIAM: If you're a giant baby, [Inaudible].

LAURA: Oh wait, I also get a d4 to the-- nope. Just kidding.

MATT: Yeah. The next attack that would already have advantage likely gets advantage already. So much advantage. We're just stacking advantages. You can fit so many advantages in this baby.

LAURA: And I'm going to use my movement to back away from it.

MATT: Okay. You can do that.

LAURA: Yeah, 'cause my duplicate's still up there, so...

MATT: Six, like around there?

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Okay. You got it. That finishes your go. Now, can-- actually, at the end of its turn, it's going to use its last legendary action to also attempt to grapple Yasha.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: So I need you to go ahead and make a strength-- this has to be an athletics or a acrobatics check. Your choice.

MARISHA: And these aren't considered attacks.

MATT: They are considered-- it is a grapple action.

LAURA: Advantage? With advantage?

MATT: Advantage, 'cause you are raging.

ASHLEY: Okay. Ooh. Okay. Okay. Okay. That would be a 23.

MATT: 23. Or actually, no, sorry. That's to escape it. This is just a strength saving throw. So what would-- which you would roll even higher, because you have the bonuses for that. So you're fine. You're fine. No grapple. You got it. Now we're back at the top of its turn and oh, hey, it's conscious. It can get up and do shit again.

MARISHA: No!

LAURA: Fuck.

TALIESIN: Bye, half your movement.

MATT: So, it is... (laughter)

LAURA: It's so big.

MATT: I need to roll, see if that comes back. It does! Okay.

MARISHA: It's got a tail.

TRAVIS: What comes back?

LIAM: I want my baby back, baby back.

TRAVIS: You rolled to see if what comes back?

SAM: The spray that's going to hit me on the way out?

MATT: Yeah. (chuckles)

MATT: So...

ASHLEY: You're prone?

SAM: I'm on its lips.

MATT: It's going to attempt to back up.

SAM: Okay. Take your shots.

LAURA: Oh yeah.

TRAVIS: I mean, if it gets out of...

TALIESIN: It's also-- it's also got-- it can't be that fast and it just burned half its movement.

TRAVIS: Yeah, right.

TALIESIN: And is Beau prone, or is Beau up?

MATT: Beau would've been up, actually.

LAURA: Yeah. She got knocked over when he stood up.

TALIESIN: So that's a couple of attacks of opportunity at least.

MATT: Yeah. It's not a very tactical creature, unfortunately.

TALIESIN: That's fine.

MATT: So both Yasha and Beau get an attack on it. See if you can.

TALIESIN: With a d4.

MARISHA: We do?

MATT: Yeah, because it's trying to back away from you. It feels a little pinned in right now.

MARISHA: Okay, with advantage, right?

MATT: Because you still have Yasha's ability.

MARISHA: Yes, yes, yes, yes. It hit for me. 23.

MATT: 23 hits.

MARISHA: No, sorry. 19 plus 10. 29.

MATT: Yeah, you hit. (laughs) You got this. You got this. Yasha, what'd you get?

ASHLEY: 24.

MATT: 24 hits. All right. Damage for both of you and it does not move. That pisses it right off.

MARISHA: All of my shit is weird. Plus two bonus to attack and damage rolls.

MATT: All right. It's going to go ahead and make a-- He's going to make a bite attack.

LAURA: Oh no.

MATT: After you finished your guys' damage here.

MARISHA: Oh.

MATT: You roll for damage for the attacks you guys hit with.

MARISHA: Right. I rolled terribly. It's nine damage.

MATT: Nine damage. Yasha?

ASHLEY: Wait, I accidentally rolled 3d6 'cause I added the divine. It's only 2d6.

MATT: Correct, only 2d6.

ASHLEY: Okay. Um, okay. That's the same amount. Do I add my stuff for the attack of opportunity? I don't know why I'm forgetting how to do all this right now because I'm nervous.

LIAM: 12 days of [Inaudible].

MATT: I think that's on your turn. I could be wrong for now. We'll just say no. We'll say it just standard attack.

ASHLEY: 7 points of damage, yeah.

MATT: With your rage bonus and strength and everything? I feel like it should be more than that.

ASHLEY: It doesn't seem right. Sorry.

MATT: That's okay. No worries.

ASHLEY: Spacing out.

MATT: Well, in the interim--

TALIESIN: This is what you're doing now. It's like, that's good because that's one of my least favorite photos. Well done.

MARISHA: Are you trying to go this way?

LIAM: It's a pretty good photo of you.

TALIESIN: t's always one that has--

ASHLEY: Sorry, 11, 11.

MARISHA: Yellow is a nice color. I like that you're color coordinated.

TALIESIN: No, the yellow is definitely...

LIAM: He's very sunny in it.

MATT: At its closeness, it's now, after having Yasha pull them out and being bludgeoned around by the other people-- and it's a little-- it looks a little bit scared and confused. Let's see who it goes after. One, two, three. Let me roll.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MARISHA: It's coming for me, isn't it?

MATT: Yeah.

MARISHA: Sentinel, bitch.

MATT: Well, she already used her reaction.

MARISHA: Oh wait, she can't. And then Sentinel on Sentinel doesn't work! Okay.

MATT: Yeah.

MARISHA: All right. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

MATT: Which actually, double check something on that.

ASHLEY: It's 22 points of damage. I'm sorry.

MARISHA: Am I able to, when he backed up, could I do-- spend a ki point to get a secondary reaction and get another attack?

SAM: You can do that?

MARISHA: It's something I rarely get an opportunity to do. Yeah. And I tend to save my ki points, but this is a time.

MATT: So, sorry. So what were you saying?

MARISHA: When it backs away, and I was able to get my reaction.

LIAM: You two really killed.

MARISHA: Can I use my Mind of Mercury to spend a ki point and get another reaction in this moment of him backing away?

MATT: You can.

MARISHA: Can I do that? I know it's a little past, but.

MATT: Well, you already tried to hit him backing away and kept him in place. You do not get the attack on somebody else who's being attacked to also has sentinel. But this is Mind of Mercury, which is I get to spend an extra ki point--

MATT: Oh, that one?

MARISHA: -- on one extra reaction.

MATT: Right. And you can go ahead and use that extra reaction to?

MARISHA: Attack. Right?

MATT: Can you? You already did your attack.

LIAM: Worst product placement ever.

MARISHA: Just move on and I'll look at the ability. I rarely use this ability. It's your-- yeah.

MATT: Regardless, you've got the extra attack, for an attack opportunity for trying to move out of your melee range and it failed, too, because you guys locked it in, correct?

MARISHA: "Once per turn, if you've already taken your reaction you may spend one ki point to take an additional reaction."

MATT: Correct. What's your additional reaction?

MARISHA: An attack. Can I not do that?

MATT: What's causing the extra attack?

MARISHA: Him-- me using Mind of Mercury and him moving out of my range

TALIESIN: Oh, no, I get it.

MARISHA: -- to get the attack.

MATT: You already did the attack to help him move out of your range. You couldn't do that. You guys both hit them, did damage, and locked him down with Sentinel.

TALIESIN: It's-- okay.

MARISHA: But I can't-- when can I spend my-- when can I do this with Mind of Mercury, to spend to get an extra ki-- like, an extra reaction. Is it not now?

MATT: Anytime, like this.

MARISHA: But I've already done it.

MATT: But the circumstance here is that you only get to attack it again if she didn't have Sentinel because you guys-- your feats cancel each other out where you get the extra attack against somebody that's not you.

MARISHA: Okay.

LIAM: In theory, there could be another enemy up against you and--

MATT: Correct.

LIAM: -- 10 seconds later, you could have used your reaction to hit somebody else moving away from you.

MATT: Correct. Or if he was attacking Veth instead of, you know, you or anybody else then you can use your Sentinel feat to then attack them with an additional reaction.

MARISHA: Okay.

MATT: Yeah. This is just one of those fiddly circumstances--

MARISHA: I see.

MATT: -- where, because it's targeting you, you don't get a reaction to attack it back.

MARISHA: No, yeah, yeah, yeah. I just didn't know if I could double down on that initial one, but no.

MATT: Yeah, you can't trigger two reactions from one trigger. Yeah. If multiple things trigger, you can spend more reactions.

MARISHA: It's rare that that even comes into play, so.

LIAM: 7,000 rules.

MARISHA: Yes. 7,000 rules. Sorry, go ahead.

MATT: It's all good. So!

ASHLEY: There's, um, an additional four points of damage with mine. I'm really sorry.

MATT: All righty.

TALIESIN: You're good.

MATT: We'll get there guys. We'll get there.

MARISHA: We'll learn how to play D&D in five years.

MATT: Nah, it's fine. All right, so it's going after you.

LIAM: Die.

LAURA: Well, that's what I love that even, like, this far into this many campaigns, we're still coming up on rules that we've never--

MARISHA: Experienced before.

LAURA: Yeah. It's cool.

MARISHA: Absolutely.

MATT: Exactly. So it's a 24 to hit.

MARISHA: I mean, it comes with a textbook. That hits.

MATT: Okay. (laughter)

MATT: All righty.

TRAVIS: It does. An intimidating one at that.

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: That is going to be 19 points of piercing damage.

MARISHA: Thank you.

TALIESIN: You're welcome.

MATT: As it bites down onto you and then you also take 13 points of acid damage.

TRAVIS: Boy.

MARISHA: Can fuck off.

MATT: In addition to its bite attack, it gets a free grasping arms attack.

MARISHA: Yeah, sure. Of course, it does.

MATT: So go ahead and make a strength saving throw for me.

TRAVIS: Beau, what'd you say to it?

TALIESIN: Still have advantage, or?

MARISHA: I don't know.

MATT: Yeah, you still have advantage.

LAURA: Man, babies hate you, Beau.

MARISHA: It knows. It knows. Strength saving throw?

MATT: Yes. You have advantage on it, because of the-

MARISHA: Oh, thank god. Oh, it's worse! (laughter)

TALIESIN: And the d4, and the d4!

MARISHA: Oh no, no, they're the same! And a d4? It's not good. Okay, okay. Eight, nine, 10, 11, 16.

MATT: 16 does not succeed, unfortunately.

TRAVIS: Are you going in?

MATT: No, she's grappled.

LAURA: You're not going in yet, you're not going in. (laughter)

TALIESIN: Wow, it's glowing.

LIAM: What?

TALIESIN: That's amazing.

ASHLEY: That looks really...

MARISHA: Why am I glowing?

MATT: It's the grapple.

MARISHA: Oh, it's the light. I thought it was something else bad!

MATT: All righty.

LAURA: Why am I glowing?

MATT: Now it finishes its turn. Fjord, you're up. Veth, you're on deck.

TRAVIS: I'm going to stay in its melee range and move around towards the front of it.

MATT: Okay. Are you going to--

TRAVIS: I'm going to try the wisdom.

MATT: Go for it. Roll for wisdom save, with advantage.

TRAVIS: With advantage.

MATT: You get to add a d4 to it.

LIAM: Fuh-jord.

TRAVIS: 16. 16 plus two is 18.

MATT: 18.

LAURA: With advantage?

MATT: Yeah, he rolled advantage. Yeah, you're fine.

TRAVIS: Was that okay?

MATT: Yeah.

TALIESIN: And a d4.

TRAVIS: Great. So I'll move around to its front and I will take a shot at chopping off tentacle-eye stalk-thing.

MATT: All right.

TRAVIS: With the Star Razor.

MATT: Go ahead and roll for an attack. It has a much higher AC, but you can attempt to.

TRAVIS: Okay, and I have advantage on this still?

TALIESIN: And a d4.

TRAVIS: And a d4.

MATT: It's like being attacked by Clippy everywhere. It's awesome.

TALIESIN: The one thing I need.

MATT: It's great.

TALIESIN: What I'm doing. Keeps me from doing any other spell.

MATT: That was awesome.

TRAVIS: 27 plus two, 29.

SAM: Wow!

MATT: That will hit. Go ahead and roll damage.

MATT: Okay, 29. First one.

LAURA: Chop it off!

TRAVIS and LAURA: Chop it off.

TRAVIS: That is 13. 13, 16...

LIAM: (like Clippy) It looks like you're trying to sever a baby's eyestalk.

TRAVIS: I'm sorry. 18 points because it's plus five for Hexblade's Curse.

MARISHA: (like Clippy) I have a template for that.

TRAVIS: 18 points of--

MATT: Slashing damage.

TRAVIS: Yep.

MATT: So as you swing with the first arc of the blade you watch as it severs mostly, but it's still holding on. The light's starting to dull a little bit, flicker. It's-- You're pretty close, but it's not quite enough to fully sever it.

TRAVIS: One more, one more swipe.

MATT: All right. You got advantage.

MARISHA: C'mon, Fjord.

TRAVIS: That'll hit, but I'll roll another one just to see. Oh, that's even higher. Yeah. It's 33 to hit.

MATT: That hits. Go ahead and roll damage.

TRAVIS: Okay.

MATT: It was a 25 AC to try and hit that thing.

LAURA and ASHLEY: Wow.

TRAVIS: No. Yeah. Eight plus... 21. 21 points.

MATT: Pulling back the second swipe. You leap a little up into the air and as you bring the blade down, you're not even sure if you hit, you just hit the ground there. And the light adjustment changes in the room as the shadows stretch and go long as you watch it hit the ground and the light fades out of the bulb on the ground. (cheering)

LIAM: My man.

ASHLEY: Yes.

TRAVIS: Amazing.

MATT: So that is no longer a worry for you.

LAURA: Cool. Which is good because Yasha is about to-- we're about to lose that advantage.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MATT: So that finish your turn, Fjord?

TRAVIS: Relentless Hex. That's only once a day? I don't see-- Bonus action. Five feet cursed. It doesn't say any, like-- could I do it again?

MATT: Should be limitations on it.

TRAVIS: Yeah, there should be, right.

MATT: Let me double check.

TALIESIN: This has been a nerve wracking fight.

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: Pull it up here.

TRAVIS: I don't see a limitation. It seems like only something you could do once.

MATT: No. It lasts as long as you-- I think as a bonus action, you can just teleport back to the target.

TRAVIS: Okay, yes, I'm going to teleport back to its anus. (laughter)

MATT: Ah-noos.

TRAVIS: (explosion sounds)

MATT: There you go.

TRAVIS: That's my turn.

MATT: All right. End of your turn, it's going to use two legendary actions.

LAURA: Two?!

MATT: Yep.

LAURA: Two?!

MATT: To attempt to swallow you, Veth.

LAURA: No!

MARISHA: Wait, are we both grappled? He's got both of us in his baby arms?

MATT: Yeah, you're both grappled.

MARISHA: Oh no.

TRAVIS: I would've tried to pull you out, but I'm Fjord.

MATT: That's a natural 20.

LAURA: No!

TALIESIN: Canceled.

TRAVIS: Can you cancel?

MATT: Yeah, you can, because you see it.

TALIESIN: Canceled.

MATT: Aw. I never get to have any fun. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Grave clerics, man.

MATT: Ah. Next campaign: no grave clerics. (laughter) No, it's totally fine.

TALIESIN: Fair. Fair.

MATT: It's totally fine. Well, good. So it's not a crit on you.

SAM: Great.

MATT: I can't wait to make NPCs that can cancel crits on you guys. I haven't done that yet. All right. So now, you take, 18-- No, sorry. Plus six would be 24 points of piercing damage.

SAM: Can I Uncanny Dodge this?

MATT: I mean, you're grappled. I think you can, yeah, still.

SAM: Okay. I'll Uncanny Dodge that.

MATT: All right so you take half that.

SAM: Okay.

MATT: Plus... That would be 20 points of acid damage.

SAM: Sure, sure, sure.

MATT: Which is also halved, technically, because that's all part of the same attack.

SAM: Oh, okay. Great.

TRAVIS: Great.

MATT: However, because you were swallowed, you also take an additional-- Okay, that's rough.

TRAVIS: Uh-oh.

LIAM: It still has two legendary--

LAURA: You're still swallowed, you're definitely swallowed?

LIAM: Yeah, he just made it not a crit.

MATT: 25 points of acid damage.

SAM: Sure, sure, sure.

MATT: And you are now swallowed by the creature.

LIAM: And it still has two resistances left. Doesn't it?

LAURA: Yes.

MATT: Yep.

LAURA: I know, that's why I haven't done certain spells on it.

LIAM: Yeah. Yeah. But until we do that, it's got them.

LAURA: It's not going to lose them.

MATT: You are restrained. You guys watch as the creature now, hurt, it lost the lure on the front of its head. It's looking panicked, the arms just stuff Veth into its mouth as it closes its jaw and you're on the outside of it, (roaring), opens up. She's gone.

MARISHA: (groaning)

SAM: I still love babies, though! (laughter)

MARISHA: (groaning)

MATT: Veth, it's your turn.

SAM: Oh, it's my turn.

MATT: At top of your turn, you begin to take digestive acid damage.

LIAM: No, no, no, no.

LAURA: God.

MARISHA: Where are you?

LAURA: Yeah, where, where are you?

SAM: I'm fine.

TALIESIN: That's Sam for, "I'm fudged."

LAURA: Yeah, "I'm going to die."

LIAM: He's about to die. (sighs)

MARISHA: Yeah. He's got that tension. He's saying he's fine, but it's not on his face.

MATT: 25 points of acid damage.

SAM: Fine, fine. Totally fine.

MATT: All right. So what are you doing?

SAM: Miles to go.

TRAVIS: "Miles to go."

SAM: I got to get out of here, right?

TALIESIN: That would be helpful.

SAM: I've got to somehow.

LAURA: You got any suude on you?

MARISHA: Don't waste it. It's better elsewhere.

TRAVIS: What did Pinocchio do?

TALIESIN: We're all going to need it when this is done.

MARISHA: Exactly. (laughter)

SAM: What are all of these empty vials in here? (laughter)

MARISHA: Scoop it up, scoop it up!

TRAVIS: Go out with a bang. (laughter)

SAM: All right. Looking through my equipment. I got a flask. (laughs) I got...

TRAVIS: (like Veth) Flutternutter!

SAM: I do have Fluffernutter. Don't think I'm not thinking about that.

MARISHA: Do you have some fireworks that I've given you? Do you have any extra fireworks?

TRAVIS: A hydra inside--

SAM: Could I just try to force my way out? Just curious.

MATT: No, you either have to do enough damage to be regurgitated or somebody else has to try and help you out, as seen.

SAM: Got it.

MATT: Or do enough damage to the inside in some way to upset.

TALIESIN: You could sneak attack it.

LIAM: Sneak attack on its...?

MATT: If you could give yourself advantage on the attack roll, then yeah.

SAM: I'm sure I don't get-- I can't shoot a thing.

LAURA: You still have advantage because it isn't Yasha's turn yet.

LIAM: It's occupied with...

MATT: It is, but you're restrained, which means you're disadvantage. So it should just become a regular attack.

LIAM: Oh, so there is no way to get advantage because of the restraint.

MATT: Technically right now, yeah.

LIAM: Oh.

SAM: Unless I hide. (laughter)

ASHLEY: You can't see me!

SAM: Wait, but if-- restrained. So there's no way, even though it's engaged with my allies and stuff...

LIAM: The restraint is canceling.

SAM: The restraint cancels all that shit.

MATT: I would say, technically, you are not using your friends to your advantage to angle for a rough spot because you're inside of its body.

SAM: Yeah.

LIAM: Fuck.

SAM: This makes total sense. I'm still looking through my equipment and not really finding anything. I have-- I wrote down rotten drug fruit from, like, months ago.

LAURA: Oh yeah. We got drug fruit. We had acid fruit. I got one of those, too.

SAM: Yeah, but that's like, months old.

LAURA: It doesn't matter.

MARISHA: That means it's more potent.

MATT: That shit is gross. One of your pouches has, like, that dark soggy bottom to it. (groaning) That you just kind of don't mention.

LIAM: Yeah. That fruit now has fungus growing on it, so it's two drugs.

MARISHA: Yeah!

TRAVIS: That's definitely got some damage to it.

MATT: What are you doing, Veth? What are you doing?

ASHLEY: Kill him.

SAM: Man. I got nothing.

TRAVIS: (as Veth) Fluffernutter. (laughter)

LAURA: Yeah, do it.

SAM: I can just stab him.

MATT: If the panic takes hold for too long, I'm going to have to move on to Yasha.

SAM: I feel you. If I Fluffernutter, I'm going to blow myself up. Right? So I'm going to take out that Corecut Dagger and just swipe.

MATT: Go for it. So make an attack. It would be with advantage and the disadvantage. So it's just a straight attack roll.

TALIESIN: With d4.

MATT: Correct.

SAM: With a d4. Might help. Doesn't really help.

LAURA: By the time it got to him--

SAM: 18.

MATT: 18. Unfortunately, as you try and carve and cut through, the stomach lining of this beast is almost as strong as the exterior of its hide. And as you try and cut and carve through, it seems to slide and not make much of an impact on the interior.

SAM: Makes sense, makes sense.

MATT: Unfortunately, it does not work.

SAM: If I had done the thing, I could take a second attack, but I can't.

MATT: Not with the dagger, you can't.

SAM: So, and that's it.

MATT: That's your turn.

SAM: I think so. I can't take a potion as a bonus, right?

MATT: I will say of this, you could, because all you did was swipe with your dagger once. Sure.

SAM: Think I'll take this potion.

ASHLEY: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

MARISHA: I thought you were fine.

SAM: I will-- I am right now, but in the next turn, probably not.

TALIESIN: That's not how any of that works.

SAM: 10 points of healing.

TRAVIS: Hey!

MATT: Great.

LIAM: God.

SAM: Now I'm okay.

MATT: Yep. And don't forget you also mark off your... yeah.

SAM: Oh shit.

MATT: Yeah.

LIAM: Fuck.

MATT: All right. So that finishes your go. At the end of your turn, it's going to use its last legendary action to attempt to spin, now that it has free arms.

LIAM: Oh, it's dancing.

MATT: The arms are now going to reach back towards you, Yasha.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: Go ahead and make a strength saving throw for me.

LIAM: Come on, you beast!

MATT: With advantage.

TRAVIS: It's just reaching for the ladies. Like, it's just looking for a mom.

ASHLEY: It is. Okay, so.

MATT: It's running on instinct.

TRAVIS: Aw, that's--

LAURA: No!

ASHLEY: Still the d4?

TALIESIN: Still the d4.

TRAVIS: It's looking for a mom?

ASHLEY: Okay.

LIAM: Are you my mother?

ASHLEY: 27.

MATT: 27. You're fine. You manage to just dodge out of the way. Now it's the top of your turn, Yasha. The bulb at the front of his head has been cut off. You don't have to worry about it. It's all you. You see Beauregard currently wrestling with the arms on one side of his mouth. Veth is vanished. The rest of your friends are beginning to gather around. What are you doing?

ASHLEY: Okay. I don't think I can pull you out because the baby's not--

SAM: Don't worry about me, I'm fine.

ASHLEY: Okay. So I'm going to take an attack at the-- I'm just going to start swinging around his neck area, trying to stay away from the tummy.

MATT: You got it. Go for it.

ASHLEY: Okay, um. (nervous noises) Okay. That would be-- Oh wait, I didn't get to roll again. So that's--

TALIESIN: With the d4.

ASHLEY: With the d4.

TALIESIN: Yeah. I will keep saying that until everyone murders me.

ASHLEY: Yeah! Okay. So 18-- Okay. 29 points. 29 for--

MATT: 29 does hit. Yep. So go ahead and roll damage on that, prepping for your second attack. Beau, you're on deck.

MARISHA: Oh lord.

ASHLEY: Okay.

LAURA: And you're grappled?

TALIESIN: You can still attack when grappled.

LAURA: In its arms?

MARISHA: I can still attack, though. I just can't go anywhere.

TRAVIS: He's not, like, healing?

MATT: No, he's looking rough.

ASHLEY: 28 for the first hit.

MATT: 28, nice.

ASHLEY: And I'm going to roll again to hit again.

TALIESIN: If it-- again, that's only if consciousness drops.

LAURA: I've been collecting them.

ASHLEY: 25.

MATT: 25 hits. Go ahead and roll damage.

ASHLEY: Okay. Let me do Savage Attacker. It's the same. ♪ (frustrated notes) ♪ 17 points of damage.

MATT: 17 points of damage. Ooh, he's looking real, real rough.

TRAVIS: Oh, real, real rough. Real, real rough! (alarm wailing) (laughter)

MARISHA: It's the real, real rough alarm.

MATT: Now without the distractions around you just rage instilled in your body, you just begin hacking at the side of its shoulder and neck. And as you do, you carve huge slivers of its flesh out that hit the ground, exposing muscle beneath, an odd old meat grayish tint to it as it sloughs off onto the ground. You're feeling good.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: All right. That finishes Yasha's turn, unless you want to move.

TRAVIS: Take a bite.

MATT: Just go in. If you're not moving, then Beauregard, it's your go.

ASHLEY: I'll stay.

LIAM: Punch the shit out of it.

MARISHA: I'm going to punch the shit out of it. I'm in its face, and I'm just going to, you know Brody in Jaws with the spear, just like as he's got me in his clasps. Wait, do I still have advantage on these?

MATT: No.

ASHLEY: No.

MARISHA: First hit. Ooh, 24, Second hit. Not great. 13, but I have a d4.

LAURA: Oh right.

MARISHA: 15 total.

MATT: Only the first hit hits.

MARISHA: First hit. All right.

SAM: Only the first tit. (chuckling)

TALIESIN: The question is, do I do damage or do I do emergency?

MARISHA: 11 damage?

TRAVIS: On him?

MATT: 11 damage, all righty.

TRAVIS: Her.

TALIESIN: Be okay.

MARISHA: Pop pop.

MATT: All right. Flurry of Blows. Go in.

MARISHA: I'm just, yeah, like. Try to slide my staff in my belt. And at this point, I'm just furious and I'm going full on claws to the eyes.

MATT: Go for it.

MARISHA: Just trying to gouge out his stupid baby eyes.

MATT: There is one eye within reach.

MARISHA: There's one eye within reach, 18.

MATT: 18 does not hit.

TALIESIN: With the d4?

MARISHA: Nope. 22. I rolled a four.

MATT: That hits.

MARISHA: That hits and then this is 12, 22 plus a d4, 23 total.

ASHLEY: Yes.

TALIESIN: Support class.

MATT: Don't forget your first level spells, yo. Some of them really scale well.

MARISHA: Yeah, they do. Okay. First hit. Oh, I said unarmed strike.

MATT: Yeah.

MARISHA: Okay. That was-- that was good. That was an eight. So. Sorry, 20.... Sorry. No. 13 damage on the first one. And that was a seven. So 12 damage.

MATT: 12 damage. Nice. So as you reach up towards the one eye that's in reach, you punch up there once, and the eye seems to almost split against the edge of the fist. With the other hand, you reach up up and gouge through and one of the eyes is just ruined.

MARISHA: Full-on tiger claw.

MATT: The interior jelly viscera begins to leak down the front of its face and its mouth opens once more as it goes, (deep-voiced baby crying)

MARISHA: I just take whatever breath I have left in his grasp and I just say: Fucking kill him! To the rest of my team.

MATT: Caduceus, you're up. Caleb, you're on deck.

LIAM: Okay.

TALIESIN: All right. I'm going to hit him with a Blight spell.

LIAM: Yeah, murder it.

MATT: Which one?

TALIESIN: Blight.

MATT: Blight, okay. Constitution save?

LIAM: Finish it.

TALIESIN: No. It's not a constitution spell.

LIAM: Well no, what's its save on the spell?

TALIESIN: Oh, it's-- I'm sorry. Constitution save.

MATT: There we go.

TALIESIN: Sorry. Yeah. (laughter)

LIAM: Finish him.

MATT: It's a 16.

TALIESIN: Nope.

MATT: All righty.

TALIESIN: 31 points of damage.

MATT: How do you want to do this? (cheering and applause)

TRAVIS: There we go.

LIAM: Cad kill.

MARISHA: Cad kill.

TALIESIN: I'm just going to-- I've had enough of this, I'm panicking. I'm going to just stab my staff into the ground. I'm going to just stab my staff into the ground. The hand around the crystals just going to get a little tighter on the crystal. I'm going to look weirdly necrotic that I don't normally do. And just a beam is going to hit out and just start sucking all the moisture out of this thing.

SAM: Ooh.

LAURA: It's Galadriel when she goes dark.

MATT: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Ooh.

MATT: As Caduceus is doing this, and you watch his hair began to rise up a little bit around him from the necrotic energy, his robe around him just flowing slightly. A wind that is sourceless seems to be blowing past him as he does this. And as the creature turns around, (monstrous crying) you watch as the eye that's currently dripped the viscera just suddenly turns to mist, the liquid and blood that's pouring out its wounds begin to just dissipate, like it's being cooked from the inside. And as it begins to stumble towards you, its first arm falls on the ground. Its ankle buckles. The other one (impact and gurgling) and you watch as the skin begins to crack and flake away. Eventually, the other eye just turns extremely hard and then crumbles into dust, its two empty sockets now looking towards you. It takes its final fall onto the ground. And as its skin begins to pull back and crack at all the corners, it is no more.

SAM: Now Matthew, did he pull a Sam Riegel and also kill me?

MATT: No.

SAM: Okay. (laughter)

TALIESIN: That acid is probably gone, though.

MATT: Hmm. Hmm. The inside is not [Inaudible].

ASHLEY: Can I try to?

MATT: It's not yet your turn. Caleb and Jester and Fjord all have their turns right now to react to this as it falls to the ground. Veth is-- you are released from it. You fall back on the ground, no longer grasped by its arms. But Veth is still within the creature. What are you doing?

LIAM: I can't see the map or where I am.

TALIESIN: I also would've backed--

MATT: Oh, you're over here.

LIAM: Yeah. (inhales) Man.

TRAVIS: I mean, we're running over and trying to pull Veth out of its mouth, right?

LAURA: Yeah. You can get-- I don't think either me or Caleb can get there in time, but you can. I'm going to hold my heal spell as well.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: For when Veth pops out.

MATT: You've got it. Okay.

TRAVIS: Yeah. I'll run over and pull open the upper lip and shove my hand in there and see if I can find Veth.

MATT: Okay. So you go ahead and your movement to get around over there would be, since it is on the ground.

TRAVIS: From a-noos to mouth.

MATT: 25, 30, you can get there. You will have enough. I'll say as your action. Yeah. You have just enough to barely pull Veth free of the mouth. But that's the extent of it, I'll say.

TRAVIS: Okay.

MATT: So as you reach in and yank her out, it's odd because now that the moisture's been drawn from a large portion of the outside of its body's immediate layer, when you're trying to reach through, it's like trying to push through dried bush. It cracks and splinters as your arms go in and you, (grunts) yank Veth out. Coated in the--

SAM: Oh, there's no roll or anything, it just happens?

MATT: No, it's dead. There's just no resistance beyond just--

SAM: What is this strange, small twig that's grabbing me, this tiny little piece of.

TRAVIS: (deep resonant voice) I've got you, Veth.

SAM: Oh, oh. That was a...

TRAVIS: Everything's going to be fine.

SAM: That was a body-- that was your body? I thought that wrist was just--

TRAVIS: Those are my pectorals pressing up against your face.

SAM: It was so skinny.

TRAVIS: I have you. It's okay. Here.

SAM: Oh my god.

TRAVIS: I'm going to clean you off a little bit. (laughter)

SAM: He's just wiping my face with his giant hands. (laughter)

LAURA: The duplicate's going to go up and touch Veth and cast Cure Wounds at 5th-level.

MATT: You got it. So go ahead and roll a heal on that. As the rest of you are taking a moment to breathe from whatever this terrible, unexpected encounter was. We're going to go ahead and take a break. (oohing) It's been a little bit. We'll be back here in a little minute to see what the aftermath of this encounter is and what this now-open chamber it stemmed from holds and has in store. So we'll see you here in a few minutes.

Break
V.O.: Now experience the ultimate way to play, by sitting at a table with your friends with your face in a screen. Progress! D&D Beyond. Log in to explore strange worlds and fantastical cities, thanks to a company based in a really boring one, that handles all the tedious math and reference stuff for you, so you can finally unleash the epic quest you've been crafting since middle school on your friends. Or just do what most people us it for, cranking out endless new characters while they're bored at work. I could finish these spreadsheets, but what if this paladin owned a horse? (romantic music) Perfect. D&D Beyond. Play with advantage.

It was the night before Winter's Crest. And all through the Xhorhaus. All the Mighty Nein was stirring. Not a creature was stirring. The Mighty Nein was stirring. Even a little mouse. It can't be mouse.

(chill music)

LAURA: Hey Critters, Laura Bailey here. Let's see what's up in the Critical Role shop. This holiday season, give the gift of effortless style. I mean, the Traveler always says, impulse purchases are a good decision. It's so cute, I can't handle it. The cuteness, it's overpowering! These holidays, you know, they're just around the corner. This is, this is a lot of stuff, you guys. We have like so many cool things right now. Ooh, look at this! Look at the details, ooh! So click on over to the Critical Role shop. Don't worry, there's a few more minutes in the break. You still got time.

TALIESIN: Like a symphony playing to an empty theater, Critical Role dines alone without its audience. Yes, that validating and most enthusiastic congregation on the other side of the fourth wall. And what is this fourth wall separating the viewer from the creator? A portal to an often sought point of connection, or the Twitch subscription zone? On the rare occasion that you miss the live bacchanal boasted by the rag-tag group of thespians on Thursday night, you may always view the show on demand in the shadow land known as the Twitch subscription zone. Picture, if you will, the necessary pieces to complete a jigsaw puzzle, but it's up to you to choose how it will be solved. You could, of course, subscribe with your debt rectangle, but many more divergent paths lie before you. Perhaps you found yourself in possession of an Amazon Prime account. You would then wake up to discover a free Twitch subscription each month for a channel of your choosing. But this artifact demands renewal, for you must re-subscribe each month to quench its unyielding thirst. One need not walk alone. Those who have already found their way can illuminate the path for others via the gift a sub button on Twitch. Critical Role is humbled by your subscription, and wishes to thank you from behind the thin veil of this fourth wall. We hope you enjoy our content as much as we enjoy making it, and so ends another meandering digression, a complicated parody promo down an indistinct highway to the region we call the Twitch subscription zone. (spooky music) You will subscribe. Twitch Prime subscribe. Gift subscribe. Subscribe.

Part II
MATT: And welcome back. So. Recovering from that unexpected encounter with the terrifying beast that now lies dead and drying in the center of the laboratory floor. What do you do?

SAM: Loot the body.

MARISHA: Fuck. Yes.

SAM: We fuck?

MARISHA: I mean, anything right now to feel alive.

TRAVIS: Maybe not fuck.

MARISHA: Yeah, okay.

ASHLEY: Well.

MARISHA: I mean.

TRAVIS: I don't know if there's much to loot.

SAM: We could take some meat in case we get hungry later.

LIAM: I do. I'm picking up its--

TALIESIN: I wouldn't eat that.

LIAM: -- oversized eyeball.

MARISHA: I don't know where the fucking came from.

TRAVIS: Can I--

MATT: Both of the eyes have have dried.

LIAM: The one that Fjord cut out?

LAURA: What about the--?

MATT: Oh, sorry, you mean the bulb? Yeah. You can totally take that.

LIAM: Yeah.

LAURA: Ew.

TALIESIN: Yeah, that's actually good.

MATT: It's about that large. Like, when you get up close to it, it's about the size of a cantaloupe, and there's still about maybe seven to eight inches of the stalk attached to it that is severed. And you can see that its dark, purple-brown blood that has now splattered on the ground beside it. It has no life, but it is definitely carriable.

LIAM: Then for the time being, I'm going to take the stalk and tie a knot on my belt.

MATT: You got it, cool.

LIAM: Let it hang there.

TALIESIN: That's a good idea.

LAURA: That's really gross, Caleb.

TRAVIS: I'm going to run over to the door that opened and unleashed this terrible thing and just peer into the hallway 60 feet.

MATT: Okay.

ASHLEY: I'm going to stand beside Fjord.

MATT: Okay. As you both square off and look down. This is a similar corridor to the one that you came through to enter here. It is a little larger than 15 feet wide, and about as tall. It is metal lined top to bottom. The floor appears to be stone or marble without texture to it, necessarily, and about 30 feet in, you can start seeing elements of the walls that are heavily cracked and some elements have fallen in. You can see, similar to the previous passage way, some cabling and beams of some kind have crumbled in a bit, but a lot of them been pushed by this creature making its way through. And you can see where it's carved through brute force its way through this hall.

LAURA: I'm assuming that that fight didn't take more than a couple of minutes total.

MATT: The whole fight was less than a minute.

LAURA: Wow. So my Locate Object would still be up.

MATT: Well, is it concentration?

LAURA: Probably.

MATT: I'm pretty sure it is. And when you summoned your--

LAURA: Oh, my duplicate.

MATT: Your duplicate, it would have lost it.

LAURA: Yeah, you're right.

LIAM: I wouldn't mind taking a breather here if we feel like we could afford it.

ASHLEY: I mean.

MARISHA: Yeah. Why not?

TALIESIN: Sure.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

SAM: Short rest?

LIAM: Yeah.

LAURA: Short rest.

LIAM: Yes, please.

MATT: All right. You guys can set yourselves up for a short rest. Use your hit dice to heal up if you got them. Get your spells back.

MARISHA: Oh yeah, Caduceus is there anything that you have that might want to help with that? Or, you know, Jester, I don't want to assume.

LAURA: I mean, if we're taking a rest, why would I use my spells to help out with that?

MARISHA: Exactly. So Caduceus?

TALIESIN: How down are you?

MARISHA: To half. A little over.

TALIESIN: Technically, I can keep healing after she's burned all of her hit dice, right?

MARISHA: I do have full hit dice, so I can go there first.

TALIESIN: I'd say hit dice first. Because that way, if you do go down again, I can just pop you back up. Whereas hit dice are-- this is all that they're good for.

LAURA: Yeah. Yeah. That's what I meant, Beau. Definitely. I will do the same if something happens to you later. I want to be able to help you, you know?

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

TALIESIN: If it makes you feel better, I've always got the one where if I hit somebody and they're unconscious, they just (explosion). You know, they're just way better.

LAURA: I've got the big bad guys packed as well.

TALIESIN: Somebody needs to like hit hard, so.

LAURA: Right.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

LIAM: Just for transparency, I'm going to use Arcane Recovery to pull back my 7th-level spell.

MATT: Can you--

LIAM: Slot. It's-- Yeah. Half your level rounded up.

MATT: Rounded up? Okay. Then, yeah. Go for it.

TALIESIN: How long is a short rest, out of the curiosity?

LAURA: An hour.

TALIESIN: Okay, great. I have an eight-hour spell still up.

LAURA: Nice. Yes. Death Ward, right?

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: "But none of the slots can be 6th-level or higher."

LIAM: Oh, can't be sixth or higher? Thank you for catching that.

MATT: No worries. I was wondering about it. I think it was one to 5th-level are the limitations on it.

LIAM: We are sleeping in the dome tonight, people.

TALIESIN: That's okay.

LAURA: That's okay.

LIAM: You two were in rare form. You decimated it.

LAURA: (intense powerful noise) This was pretty impressive. That was the most I've ever done on something like that for sure.

SAM: You mean damage?

LAURA: Yeah.

SAM: It was very impressive.

MARISHA: Yeah. I feel like between this and the worm I'm questioning my, you know, usefulness, but it'll be great.

LAURA: What are you talking, Beau?

SAM: You landed some solid biffs and bams.

LIAM: Oh yeah, just to make you feel better, I did literally nothing the entire time. I think I saw you smacking it in the face a few.

MARISHA: That does make me feel better, thank you. Yeah.

LIAM: You two, though, are good with babies. (laughter)

TALIESIN: Putting them down. Just really doing some damage.

LAURA: Yeah, what?

LIAM: It can be hard to put a baby down. They would just keep getting back up.

LAURA: I've heard.

LIAM: Yeah.

MARISHA: I spent a lot of good drugs on that baby.

LAURA: What do you mean? How, how, how?

MARISHA: I, you know, I had that whole package of suude. That was a lot of suude, and I thought maybe I could take it down from inside when I was in there, but I think it just knocked it unconscious for a hot second. That's it.

LAURA: Yeah, yeah, yeah!

ASHLEY: Yeah. That's why he fell over.

MARISHA: Babies are resilient, turns out.

LIAM: Yeah. Well, at his sort of girth and density, I imagine that was more like a microdose.

MARISHA: Probably, yeah. You're not wrong.

LIAM: Got the job done, though. You're here, breathing.

LAURA: That's right, worth it.

MARISHA: I'll find more drugs. I'll find more drugs. There are more drugs.

SAM: There's more drugs out there.

MARISHA: There are, you're right. It gives me hope.

SAM: Yeah. Some something to keep going for.

LIAM: The drugs will come out tomorrow. Bet your bottom dollar. Right, Yasha?

ASHLEY: Yes. That tomorrow there will be sun.

LIAM: Yeah.

ASHLEY: Yeah. Wait, question, though.

SAM: Drugs.

ASHLEY: There will be drugs, sorry, but that's a specific kind of drug that I know about.

SAM: Oh! Sun is a drug?

ASHLEY: It's, mm. (chef's kiss) Delightful. (laughter)

SAM: Canon.

TALIESIN: Canon.

ASHLEY: Wait, what is this? Is this...

SAM: The baby?

ASHLEY: Was this made?

TRAVIS: The elephant baby?

ASHLEY: I don't understand.

LAURA: I think it had to be. This isn't natural. Right? Did they make this here? Has it been alive this whole time?

ASHLEY: Is this a biological weapon?

SAM: Yeah, maybe they made it here. Have I heard of such a baby before?

MATT: You can go ahead and roll a history-- Well, history or arcana, your call.

LAURA: Would it be in any creepy, scary stories Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark books that I have in my collection at home?

MATT: No.

LAURA: Damn.

SAM: 22.

MATT: You have no idea.

LIAM: Well, there are books on the infernal and all kinds of strange oddities across the planes. This could be anything.

TALIESIN: I think it's a lot of things.

LAURA: I read about this lady once who had a spider that laid eggs in her cheek. And then they exploded out.

SAM: Out of the outside of the cheek?

LAURA: Yeah. Like the eggs hatched in the cheek, and the spider eggs went everywhere.

TRAVIS: This is amazing. Aren't we on a bit of a clock?

SAM: Oh yeah.

LAURA: Yeah. Well, we're resting. That's why we're, you know, we can't do anything. But I'm assuming it's been about an hour now.

ASHLEY: How long--

MATT: Sure, we can jump ahead.

ASHLEY: How long would it take if I were to cut and take the spine with me?

SAM and LIAM: Oh my gosh.

MARISHA: She can make more bone harps, like eight more bone harps.

TRAVIS: That's, like, a cello.

MATT: If you wanted to take some time, you could carve some bone out of it. The spine is heavy. I mean, the entire creature in its own right weighs well over a ton or two.

ASHLEY: Okay, we don't have time. I just was thinking this would be-- I saw his body and it was like, "This would be a beautiful instrument."

MATT: You can carve some bone from it, if you'd like, yeah.

ASHLEY: Yeah, I'll take some bone.

LIAM: Xylophone?

ASHLEY: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll take some bone just to have.

SAM: Some baby bone?

TALIESIN: You can certainly dry it out now.

MATT: Yeah.

SAM: Has its skull fused yet? Because it's still a baby.

LAURA: What? Can we just not?

LIAM: Wow.

LAURA: I don't want to actually think of it as a baby, okay?

SAM: Oh, I'm sorry, it just had a baby face, and so...

LAURA: It also had lots of arms sticking out of the baby face. It was not...

MARISHA: Yeah.

LAURA: It was not a baby.

MARISHA: And a weird bulb that was very entrancing.

SAM: I thought that was the umbilical cord.

TRAVIS: It could be super old. I mean, this city is the beginning of time city. It's been here for forever.

MARISHA: Yeah, but we're in a laboratory.

TALIESIN: Are there any bits of this door that explain why it's being held up or anything or this door just comes out of the wall. It's not really--

MATT: It raises up.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: And based on the previous doorways you've encountered, it looks like it probably has some sort of heavy chain and weighted mechanism that lifts it up into the ceiling. And since it raised as the previous one closed, you assume that there is some sort of weighted connection between the two of them.

TALIESIN: Boo.

LIAM: Yeah. And to be clear, these people who existed a long time ago, everything that we have read said that they were rivaling, if not surpassing, all arcane ability today. They had immeasurable power. So while it was a long time ago, it was not the beginning of time. They would have needed much time to have achieved this sort of sophistication with their skill.

LAURA: (nervously) Mm-hmm.

MARISHA: He's not wrong. Do I see any signs of dead adventures? People that was with... I-- Iver?

MATT: Go ahead and make an investigation check, if you'd like to.

MARISHA: Or even when I was in the baby?

LAURA: Should we cut open its belly and see if we can find other people?

LIAM: Hmm.

MARISHA: Natural 20.

LAURA: Yay!

MATT: Okay.

SAM: Wild magic.

MATT: As part of the short rest as well, as Yasha is carving through, you together guide some elements to try and expose the contents of its belly. Its physiology is very odd and elements of it don't make sense. For one, the stomach only has an inner point. There is no real functional digestive tract beyond the stomach.

TRAVIS: There was no ah-noos.

LIAM: It's like an owl. (vomiting)

MARISHA: Barfs everything out. Okay.

MATT: And within the stomach, you do find a scattered, digested remnants of some bone that still exists, though it is mostly dissolved. You can make a medicine check, if you'd like to, to see if you can ascertain the nature of whatever creature these bones originally came from.

LAURA: Could I help out with that?

MARISHA: Yeah, can I have Jester help me figure out who these people are?

MATT: Whoever wants to go ahead and make the check. Or you can both make it.

LAURA: I got good medicine.

MARISHA: Yeah, with advantage, you go twice. Jester. What are these bones from?

LAURA: 29.

MATT: 29. These are definitely humanoid bones. The rate of dissolution on them says that they have not been in the stomach long. Probably been a few days.

LAURA: Mm-hmm.

MATT: You probably see enough-- I mean, who knows how much is been gone and just these are the remnants of it, but you can see elements of bone here that lead to at least two people.

TRAVIS: A previous party.

TALIESIN: No undissolved magical weapons.

MATT: Not within here, no.

TALIESIN: All right.

MARISHA: Did we get an indication from Iver of how many people he came with?

LAURA: Yes.

LIAM: It was four or five, I thought he said.

LAURA: Yeah. I can't remember, but he did tell us.

MARISHA: But Caleb remembers.

LIAM: I don't remember. I think it was four or five.

MATT: Yeah, I think it was five.

LIAM: It was five, definitely. I remember everything.

MARISHA: Roughly... five people. Okay. All right, well.

LAURA: A couple are here.

MARISHA: Bad news for Iver.

LAURA: There might be a more bad news up ahead.

MARISHA: Yeah. Or maybe an ally.

LIAM: Maybe.

MARISHA: I am not hopeful.

LIAM: Is everyone feeling ready?

LAURA: Yeah. I certainly don't want to allow the Tomb Takers to catch up with us, so.

TALIESIN: Let's move.

TRAVIS: We move forward.

TALIESIN: Everybody all right?

SAM: Yep!

MARISHA: Ye-- Ye-- Yeah.

TALIESIN: All right.

LAURA: Are you fully healed, Beau?

MARISHA: For the most part. A few scrapes, but I'm fine.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: Okay. What is the marching order going forward? You can stand four in a row in this tunnel, so.

LIAM: I'll be in the front row, then.

MATT: All right, who's in the front?

LAURA: I'll be in the front as well.

SAM: I guess I should be as well in case we see anything trappy.

MATT: All righty, and who else?

MARISHA: I'll be in the back row.

TALIESIN: I'll take the middle. Anywhere in the middle.

TRAVIS: I'll do back row.

SAM: I'm trappy.

MATT: So that'd be Yasha. You got to be in the front or the back.

ASHLEY: I'll go front. Yeah.

MATT: All right. So you continue down this extended hallway. Further down, you can see heavy dents in the metallic walls, points of catastrophic impact that caused elements to just bend inward and some of the metal to actually split. You can see, behind it, stone and elements of cable that also are now severed and crushed. The trauma in here shows that there was major impact from inside here and also structural damage from a heavy impact, probably when this piece of the city fell to Eiselcross originally. About 50, 60 feet down, you begin to see the occasional blood smear on the wall. Like a hand print that just drags across. Another place you see a blood smear across the ground that goes on for about 40 feet before vanishing. But you see no sign of bodies.

MARISHA: Oh boy.

MATT: Continuing on for almost a hundred or so feet, the hall opens into a new room of sprawling size but in absolute disarray. Similar in architecture to the previous laboratory that you had your battle with this creature in. This room, however, is heavily damaged. You can see major sections of the ceiling that have fallen in due to the structural damage and collapse. And there are large beams and metallic pathways that were once raised, have now fallen to the ground and clattered. You can see there are stone tables that are crushed and there is broken rock and instruments that are bent and destroyed and just tossed everywhere. With what little bit of light as you progress in here and begin to incrementally see, you can see there are, to the right and left of you, open doors, roughly the size of the one that you came through, to small enclosed chambers. You see two to the right and left. And-- do you want to continue forward?

LIAM: Those are open doorways?

MATT: They are open, yes.

LAURA: I am going to-- how many do I have left?

TALIESIN: Want me to put a light in there?

LIAM: I'll-- fump. Globule.

LAURA: And I'm going to cast Locate Object one more time.

MATT: Okay. Continuing forward. As the light drifts out, you can see now these additional doors, there are a number of them and there are varying sizes, but they are enclosed within. They are similar to prison cells. There is no window or door on the inside. They are more like containment units, but they are open.

LIAM: All of them, okay.

MATT: You see shards of glass around you and debris. And... Caduceus, Beauregard, and Caleb, with your passive perceptions, you also see signs of a deadly confrontation. You see melted bones, bloody smears, shreds of clothing left behind amongst the debris and rubble.

MARISHA: And you said they looked like jail cells?

MATT: I mean, it's the best thing you could equate it to. Because there was a door, and there was no other exit from it. There is no window or anything.

MARISHA: Cages.

LAURA: Test subjects.

MARISHA: Test subjects, yeah.

LIAM: Is there any writing like we have encountered previously?

MATT: Make a perception check.

LIAM: Okay.

LAURA: Do I have a general ping in my brain?

MATT: You do. It is below and a little ways to the right, beneath the chamber.

MARISHA: (quietly) Below and to the right.

LIAM: 20.

MATT: 20, okay. A couple things catch your eye. One, you see a glimmer of some sort of shiny metallic rod that's maybe about 15 feet off from you that's partially buried and left underneath one of the cracked tables. You also see a bit of sky blue colored cloth that stands out against the rest of the debris, about 20 feet ahead of you. You can see it's right next to one of the openings to one of those chambers. And it looks like a piece of the chamber door has fallen over, and you just see a little bit of this light blue shawl that is peaking out from underneath it.

TALIESIN: Is there-- go ahead.

MATT: You do also see further in the chamber large, somewhat green-frosted or the remnants of green-frosted glass containers that immediately remind you--

MARISHA: Of Halas?

MATT: -- of Halas and the Folding Halls.

LIAM: Yeah. Same size thereabouts?

MATT: Larger.

LIAM: Larger.

MATT: And broken. The glass is shattered, and some of them are tipped over and broken on the ground. Towards the back, which you do finally see an end to the chamber about 120 feet in. This is a large massive warehouse-type interior. You see two that are still solid, unbroken. At this distance, you can't make out much beyond that. You can see there is a panel in the center of the chamber between these that is not ruined that does seem to have some sort of writing, but you'd have to get closer and through the use of a spell to probably read it.

LIAM: Right, yeah. First thing to do is read before touching. So I will cast Tongues on myself again.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: And approach that writing.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: Do we hear any kind of movement in the room? Is it silent in here?

MATT: At the moment, right now, if you'd like to make a perception check to listen, you can.

TALIESIN: I also want to see if those bones look like they were acid melted or something else melted.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: And I'll make my way to the cloth.

LAURA: 24.

MATT: 24. Okay.

TALIESIN: 27.

MATT: 27. Listening out and keeping your eyes peeled, you do not hear any movement. It is still, eerily so, in here. The only sound you make is the sound of crunching debris beneath the boot falls of you and your compatriots around you. But because the chamber is so large, and because there's so much debris in the way, what faint bit of an echo there would be is absorbed by the surrounding irregularities. You were looking towards--?

TALIESIN: I just wanted-- one of the things I wanted--

MATT: Oh, the bones? Make a medicine check for me.

LIAM: Also, note, I meant Comprehend Language, not Tongues.

MATT: I assumed that's what you were referring to.

TALIESIN: 17.

MATT: 17. The bones you do find do appear to be acid dissolved.

TALIESIN: That's good.

MATT: You were inspecting the shawl?

MARISHA: Yes.

MATT: Okay. You go towards it and you can see now it is stained with blood and torn, peeking out from underneath the barrier. And from glancing, it looks like there is a crushed body beneath that piece of metal.

MARISHA: Recent blood? Is it brown and dark or is it fresher?

MATT: It's-- it's brown. It's congealed, but it's not entirely dried. It seems a little bit fresher than what you'd expect in a place so ancient.

MARISHA: I just shout out to the rest. I think there's a body still here. And I move closer towards it.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: I'm going to move closer towards it, too, and detect undead.

MATT: Okay. You do not detect undead.

LAURA: I'm going to head over that way as well.

MATT: Okay. You go and you can see that bit of cloth material, there was a shoulder and you see a little bit of hair. It's still pinned beneath the-- the metal plate that has fallen on top of it.

MARISHA: Yasha, help me lift this.

ASHLEY: Yep. One, two, three.

MATT: Okay, go ahead and make a strength check with advantage. Or you both can do it.

MARISHA: Advantage.

MATT: All right, go for it.

ASHLEY: 28.

MATT: 28.

TRAVIS: Damn.

MATT: Easy enough to do. You get up and shift it over. You hear the (screeching) as it grinds across the stone. (heavy impact) And when that hits the ground, it hits with a heavy impact. You do feel the (thud) echo throughout the room a bit. A little bit of dust settles a bit from the ceiling.

TALIESIN: I'm going to be on high alert.

MATT: Okay. You do see the partially crushed corpse of a woman, wearing fine studded leather gear, half-elven, and the rest of the shawl that you see that is torn and bloodied from part of the torso, you can see that it's just gashed open. Does bear the mark of the Cerberus Assembly across the lapel.

MARISHA: Shit.

TALIESIN: Get that rod, too, while we're here.

MARISHA: Cerberus Assembly.

LIAM: It's the annex.

TRAVIS: The annex?

SAM: It's the--

LIAM: -- the assistant, Zana.

LAURA: Ludinus'--

MARISHA: Oh, this is Zana.

LAURA: Can I search her?

SAM: Search her for a wallet--

MARISHA: Letters.

SAM: ID.

MATT: Sure, make an investigation check.

SAM: Student ID.

LAURA: Investigation, I guess I should-- should I do this? Or should I make Beau search her?

MARISHA: Is it perception or investigation?

LAURA: Investigation?

SAM: I mean, I can do it.

LAURA: I mean, I said I was going to do it, but.

MATT: Yeah, go ahead and make a roll. You can both do it.

SAM: You go.

LAURA: No, I have terrible investigation.

SAM: You're an expert detective! Here, take my magnifying glass.

LAURA: Oh, thank you.

MATT: (laughs)

LAURA: I didn't even Guide myself.

MATT: To be fair, the other hand was a little occupied.

LAURA: 15.

MATT: 15. Okay. Looking through, you do not see any coins, per se. There is a small shortsword that is sheathed. It doesn't look like it gets a lot of use. You do not see any other weapon, though there is a sheath for what looks to be... almost like a rapier or a long thin weapon on the other hip. This individual is wearing fine leather armor. For the state of the rest of the body, especially given some of the recent encounters you had, and the the damage that the physical torso and head has sustained, the armor is fairly impeccably kept.

MARISHA: Any documents? Any notes?

LAURA: Not that I could find, but she's got some really cool armor.

MARISHA: Did you check her cleavage pocket? There's always a cleavage pocket. Can I check and see if I find any paper? Is that different enough?

MATT: Sure. You reach through the front of the chest plate to where the cleavage would be and your hand finds an open cavity.

MARISHA: Haaaaah. I just pull it back, a little freaked out.

MATT: Your fingers find-- (squishing) and you pull out and your hand is just covered in coagulated blood.

MARISHA: Gross, gross, gross, gross. I walk away.

SAM: Wipe it on something, wipe it on on the wall.

MARISHA: I wipe it on Caduceus.

LAURA: I'm going to start searching around for that other weapon. I'll say, she had another weapon. It was a long skinny--

SAM: I'm going to take off the armor.

LIAM: It was a rod.

LAURA: It was a rod?

LIAM: Oh, you're talking about that, but the DM also mentioned a rod poking out.

LAURA: Obviously it was a rod, but I don't know that. But Caleb, you would.

LIAM: I called out everything.

MATT: Right.

LAURA: Oh, there was a rod!

MATT: Sure.

LIAM: No, I'm at the panel you were talking about.

MATT: Gotcha. So at the panel. The phrasing there essentially translates to "Hunter Development List."

MARISHA: Hunter Development List.

MATT: And the bottom portion of it is missing. It looks like it has sustained some damage and some of the stonework is cracked and removed from it. But what you do see beneath that, you see a phrase that says, Absorber: 0-072.

MARISHA: Zero dash zero seven two?

MATT: Correct.

MARISHA: Absorber.

MATT: Beneath that you see: Nullifier 0-038.

LIAM: Don't like this.

MARISHA: Nullifier.

LAURA: Yeah, no, this sucks. This is stuff that fucks up magic.

LIAM: We just killed the absorber.

TRAVIS: Keep going.

MATT: "Subject" is the next one. 0-002.

LAURA: Ooh.

MARISHA: -- dash zero zero two.

LAURA: That's an early one.

MARISHA: Yeah it is. Subject--

MATT: And that's all that remains on that panel.

LIAM: Okay, and are those words by buttons of any kind or they're just--

LAURA: Ooh, I bet those are the other doors.

ASHLEY: Are there any numbers on top of the doors and things like that?

MATT: What was that? I'm sorry.

ASHLEY: Any numbers on top of the doors or archways or something like that?

MATT: Going and keeping an eye out, you do not see any numbers marking the doors, no.

SAM: How's that armor look? Can I get it off that body?

MATT: Yeah. You can get off that body. It'll take you a little bit, and it's not going to be the cleanest armor. It definitely smells of decay.

SAM: I'll work on it.

MATT: All right.

LAURA: I'm going to search for that rod that Caleb pointed out. So I'm going to go to that rod that Caleb pointed out.

MATT: Okay. You pull it free. And it is a solid platinum thin, almost like a cane, like a walking cane, that has interesting cap engravings in the top and bottom, but it seems just solid and simple, but also very beautiful in its simplicity. It's lightweight. And it looks to me made of platinum.

LAURA: Ooh! I'll do a little song and dance with it.

SAM: It could be magic.

LAURA: I bet it is!

SAM: Do something like a--

LAURA: No, I don't want to accidentally cast something with this. It could be super dangerous.

LIAM: I cast Detect Magic.

MATT: Okay. The rod that she is carrying is indeed magical. As well as the armor that you are removing from the body.

LAURA: Oh, grab the little strap to tie it to your waist. She has a harness for this thing.

MATT: You also sense strong magical essences coming from the two unbroken glass containers on the far side of the chamber.

MARISHA: Yeah. Can I make my way-- ♪ make my way ♪ to the test tubes?

MATT: Sure.

MARISHA: Thank you.

SAM: (piano from "A Thousand Miles")

TRAVIS: Were those test tubes long enough to hold said elephant baby?

MATT: Not quite that large, no. But both of them look to be between 12, 13 feet tall and about say eight, nine feet wide.

TRAVIS: Cool, yep. Great. Great, yep. Gotta take attendance sometime here.

MATT: As you both approach, and the light helps you clarify the details. You can see the interior of the glass, much like the shattered ones around, definitely dirty. You can see there is old, long built up whether it be bacteria or some sort of fungus or just dirt has gathered in splotches on the inside of the glass. But you also see shapes of something within, and it appears to be liquid-filled. And as you get close, you see within one glass tube, the one that's to the left of where you're facing, a vaguely humanoid bipedal body of a dark yellow jaundiced color, standing-- or would be standing if it were standing, about 10 feet tall. But it is currently hunched and just elevated within the tube. Its elongated arms, and then these massive clawed hands, while a terrifying serpent head sits on its shoulders. Its eyes are closed in some kind of torpor. Its torso, you can see, seems to bear nearly a dozen odd slits, like horizontal gills across it, and in an odd pattern. And as you look over it, you swear you see one of these slits twitch faintly. To the right, you see another tube. And within this one, it holds a quadrupedal panther-like creature, nearly the size of a horse that is curled up on itself and just drifting and leaning against one side of it. You can see it has these heavy claws, though they're currently not extended, and a weirdly colorful patterned body that has elements of maroon and teal. It's weirdly unexpectedly colorful. And you can see where it rests suspended. It has a thick fleshy stalk of a tail that seems to emerge from the base of its pelvis and it curves underneath it. And at the end of it you see an eyeball about this large, lidless, within there. And as soon as you see it, (squelching) it looks towards you.

MARISHA: Oh my god.

LAURA: They're like awake, they're awake?!

TRAVIS: Underneath the pelvis? Or on the tail?

MATT: At the end of the tail.

TRAVIS: Oh god.

LIAM: Is there any labeling, numbering--

LAURA: An eyeball on the tail?!

LIAM: -- or anything on their vat or anything?

TRAVIS: And it has a head, right?

MATT: You approach and look down, and at the base of the-- at the base of the one that has the eye at the end of the tail-- let me double check on this one, actually.

LAURA: Oh no.

LIAM: One of these the subject and one the nullifier?

MARISHA: The nullifier? We have absorber, nullifier, subject.

LIAM: You were just absorbed in that last chamber. I'm wondering if that was the absorber.

LAURA: That could be the subject.

TRAVIS: If it's displacer-based, it could be.

LIAM: Who knows.

MARISHA: Who knows.

MATT: Okay. Yes. So the--

LAURA: Please don't break out.

MATT: The panther-like creature underneath the glass, you could see while your spell is still on there, it reads, "Absorber." There isn't a number; it just says "Absorber."

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: The one that has the serpent head and the elongated arms, it says, "Nullifier."

MARISHA: So, okay.

TALIESIN: Let's just keep walking very quietly.

MATT: As you are this far in the chamber, you do see the end of it, as the far wall, it comes to an end. You can see there is a heavy crumbled mass of failed structure that has just fallen in and blocked any further access. From when you glanced around, you haven't noticed any sort of other exit doors prominently displayed.

LAURA: I don't like this room, you guys.

SAM: Nope.

MARISHA: Me neither.

TALIESIN: There's been no floor grates, no--?

MARISHA: Ways down?

MATT: If you want to go ahead and take a look, roll a perception check.

TALIESIN: 30.

MATT: 30.

TALIESIN: Good roll.

MATT: You do not see any floor grates, and as they're having these conversations and glancing about and futzing with armor, you begin to do the Caduceus scan of the environment. As tall as you are, and seeing what's around there, you begin to crouch low and glance beneath some of these fallen tables. What you do eventually find, near the far right end of where the heavy structural damage is, you see underneath one of the stone tables that is partially lifted to one side, an opening in the wall about two feet by two and a half feet, very tight, but it seems to be an angled tunnel. It's large enough for a singular person to-- of your largest sizes-- uncomfortably fit through, but fit through.

LIAM: Veth?

SAM: Is that the direction that you felt the object?

LAURA: Head down and to the right. Is it in the right direction?

MATT: It seems to be angling in a somewhat similar direction.

LAURA: Yeah, yeah. That's where we should go.

LIAM: Well, let me finish what I'm doing here. You handed this to me. While Caduceus scanned the room, I started in on Identify for this rod.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: So if we can wait another six or seven minutes.

TALIESIN: I think we can maybe start sending people through, since it's going to be--

LAURA: No no no. Oh, I mean--

TRAVIS: We just don't know if it'll slide and then that'll be it.

TALIESIN: Fair, fair.

SAM: I'll go.

MARISHA: You still have my goggles, yeah?

SAM: Yep, sure do.

MARISHA: If you lose those, I'll break your pinky.

LAURA: I'm going to Guidance you before you head in there. Just so you get a, you know, a little help on something.

SAM: Thank you.

TRAVIS: Do you want a rope in case you need to be pulled up?

SAM: Yes, definitely.

TRAVIS: Great, who's got rope?

LAURA: Oh yeah, we should talk quietly. Wait, the tubes.

TRAVIS: (whispering) Yeah, here's 50 feet of rope.

ASHLEY: (whispering) Okay.

MARISHA: (whispering) Why are we whispering?

LAURA: Because of the tubes!

MARISHA: Oh.

TALIESIN: It twitches weird, I want to notice.

MARISHA: I think I still have rope.

TRAVIS: By the way, do we see any sort of flush or not flush buttons that were in the previous room?

MATT: Glancing around here, you see things that might've held a similar structure, but have since been shattered. This isn't some extremely button covered panel room. Everything here is generally much more reserved and deliberately placed in smaller spaces. At least from what you can gather of this strange Aeorian layout. But you see a couple of platforms that probably served a similar purpose, but they have been wrecked.

LAURA: Does this room seem like this was the hangout place for giant baby elephant? And it's just ravaged the room because of it?

MATT: It kind of does.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: You can see some of the side chambers that are open those cell-like chambers would be large enough to carry a creature like this.

TRAVIS: Just so we're acknowledging it, right, if we move forward and if someone does happen to catch up to us at this point, we will be ahead, and they could, in theory, take these two things out of the cages and send them after us. We don't think there's anything worth doing to them while they're in there?

SAM: Could we open the cages and convince them to be on our side with some sort of magic?

MARISHA: (laughs) Yeah.

LAURA: Could we just ignore them and hope that's--

TRAVIS: We could tell them to run the other way.

LAURA: If they're anything like giant baby, I don't think they can be reasoned with.

TALIESIN: I think this is exactly the sort of thing we shouldn't touch.

SAM: Fjord is very persuasive, Could you have any magic that could control or command them?

TRAVIS: Yeah, in theory.

LIAM: Just as an idea, as I'm tracing circles around this rod, could we maybe all go into that little tunnel and break them out and seal this passage after us so that they are left for anyone coming behind us?

SAM: Smart thinking.

LAURA: Sure, but then how will we get out?

LIAM: Can you shift stone around like you've done before?

LAURA: I mean--

LIAM: You shifted in the way, could you shift it out of the way?

LAURA: Well, sure. But then we'd have to fight them when we come back out.

TALIESIN: I think better just to leave them alone.

LAURA: I think we leave them. I think whoever it is that releases them in the future, they'll probably have to fight them, too.

TALIESIN: I'll leave something for whoever comes next.

LIAM: I can also leave a wire up, to let us know if anything follows.

SAM: Wait. You don't have-- at some point, one of us had some sort of glyph that we could put on something.

TRAVIS: Oh, what about the Intuit?

TALIESIN: Yeah. I have Guardian of Faith.

TRAVIS: That's lit.

LIAM: We haven't discussed that. That's a lot. That is a lot.

SAM: It's a big bomb, right?

TRAVIS: Well, kind of. It is a bit of a Bouncing Betty, but it's not like a bomb.

LAURA: Oh, I don't have the glyph prepared today.

TRAVIS: It's like a pause button.

SAM: A pause button?

TRAVIS: It's like a 300 foot, (boom), everything stops.

TALIESIN: It's like an EMP.

SAM: Stops?

LIAM: Are we talking about the same thing?

TRAVIS: I think so.

LIAM: I'm talking about the thing that we just found in this structure.

TRAVIS: With the triangles.

LIAM: It releases a massive wave of psychic damage against anyone in a massive amount of space. You could hit an army with this thing

TALIESIN: Including any of us as well.

TRAVIS: And it stuns them as well.

TALIESIN: I can leave a Guardian of Faith.

SAM: Well, we can't leave anything that, like, if someone walks in the room it would explode the cages and release these things. Because we don't have that glyph thing, right?

LAURA: No, sorry.

SAM: I could rig something with some engineering know-how and a little bit of spunk.

TALIESIN: I could just leave a thing that takes about a minute to put there and we could keep moving.

SAM: Okay.

LAURA: Yeah, yeah.

MATT: (laughs) Or that. Sure, we'll go with that.

TALIESIN: I can make something in six seconds.

LAURA: Oh yeah. Let's do that. We can also hide this little tunnel, so that anybody coming into this room won't be able to find it right away.

SAM: Great.

LAURA: With a table or something.

TRAVIS: And before we go, we're waiting on the rod in the armor, right?

LAURA: Yeah.

SAM: If you want, you can start sending me down now.

LIAM: The way this thing works is that we could leave it behind and--

LAURA: The rod?

LIAM: No, I don't know what that does. I have been casting a spell. I can't say this.

MATT: Yeah, you're concentrating. So you're casting Identify?

LIAM: Identify, yeah.

MATT: On which one, the rod?

LIAM: The rod.

MATT: The rod, it acts the same as a Wand of Fear does, but it has been enchanted into a rod-type object. So if you look up a Wand of Fear--

LIAM: So it's a Rod of Fear.

MATT: Yeah. Rod of Fear.

LAURA: What's the difference between a wand and a rod?

MATT: A wand is smaller and can be used as an implement. You can use a rod, too, as well.

LIAM: It's like a flame dagger and a flame sword.

MATT: It's a variation to a similar idea.

LAURA: Cool, cool, cool.

SAM: Oh, can cast--

TALIESIN: Someone being fancy.

LIAM: But this thing, now that I've finished, could be left here or some other time. And the moment our pursuants enter its range it will go off, whether or not we are here. Depends on if we think that is a big enough--

MARISHA: That's the time bomb?

SAM: If we set it, and it doesn't go off because no one follows us, can we unset it and use it again another time, or is it one use only?

TRAVIS: That's a good question. It can be psychically triggered, but--

LAURA: This is so-- the range is so far.

TRAVIS: Three hundo.

SAM: But Caleb would set it off with his mind.

TALIESIN: 300's a long way.

TRAVIS: Yeah, you want to save that shot.

MARISHA: I agree.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

SAM: Can it be reused?

MARISHA: I don't think this is it.

TALIESIN: No, it's a one off.

LIAM: Well, if it doesn't go off, it can be reused but if it goes off, that's it.

MARISHA: We're about to face something extraordinary in Aeor. Who knows what we need.

TALIESIN: Let's save it.

SAM: But if you leave it and put up your string, you'll know when someone comes in the room and then you can decide to use it or not. Right?

TALIESIN: Or they find it and take it.

LIAM: I won't know who or what.

LAURA: Yeah. You wouldn't know if they come in.

TALIESIN: It just seems like not enough value for--

TRAVIS: We've only seen Molly use, like, a couple of those glowing eyes. What if he's got a Disable Intuit eye? Then we're like, "Oh shit!"

LIAM: I also don't think this would be enough to take out Lucien in one shot.

TALIESIN: I think it'd give us 20 seconds, tops.

MARISHA: Yeah, 20 seconds we want to be there for, to fully maximize it. Right?

LIAM: I think this might be better if we were facing a horde.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

SAM: Doesn't it take minutes to use?

LIAM: Spend one minute.

SAM: Yeah. We can't use it in battle. It's a preset thing that you have to put--

MARISHA: But if you know.

LIAM: We're being followed by five or six very powerful people.

LIAM: We're being followed by five or six very powerful people. I don't think that this is strong enough to take them all out in one shot.

LAURA: I think it's a waste of the item.

SAM: Okay.

TALIESIN: I'd like to get moving now.

MARISHA: It's great for an ambush when we know that we can be there for it.

SAM: Okay.

TALIESIN: Are my eyes doing anything?

MATT: Nothing at the moment, no.

TALIESIN: Okay.

LAURA: But you can do something.

TALIESIN: I can leave something. It'll be obvious that we've been here, but I can leave something. It's not a lot, but it'll annoy them.

SAM: Why don't you guys start lowering me down on the rope?

ASHLEY: Yeah. I'm helping with the rope.

TRAVIS: We're doing the butt, behind the butt.

MATT: Okay. So for you, it's relatively open space. You don't feel cramped necessarily, but it is at an angle that gets a little bit steep within the first 10 or so feet. And you're lowering yourself now, down, down, down, down. How long is the rope?

TRAVIS: 50 feet.

MATT: 50 feet. You hit a 50-foot end of the rope where you guys give it, and it's still going. And so you either have to add more rope or slide.

ASHLEY: I'll take out-- I have extra rope, so--

SAM: I send a message: End of the rope, got any more?

TALIESIN: Tie it and--

SAM: You can respond.

TRAVIS: Who'd you send the message to?

SAM: Oh, to Yasha.

ASHLEY: Oh, hello. Stand by. Take out my 50 feet. Okay. Keep going.

MATT: At about 110 feet down, you can see as you're following it the straight angled arc downward. You're glad you have a rope. Because the slide would've been scary, especially when you begin to see the shaft that you're in just open up, like it blew up from the inside and it just falls down into a chamber.

SAM: So I'm at the end of the rope again?

MATT: No, you still have more slack to go, but you see-- you can now see approaching quickly where it just ends and opens up into something below. You can see beyond about maybe 15, 20 feet across, this slide continues, but something beneath it just blew up or fell out and opened up the base of this duct.

SAM: All right. So I'll look out of the duct and see what's below in the chamber.

MATT: What's the darkvision range on that?

SAM: 60, I think?

MATT: 60, right? Okay. You look down and all you see are the tops of trees.

SAM: Trees? What?!

TALIESIN: Oh my god, we're in the fun ball.

SAM: Where are we?

TRAVIS: Boy, it sure feels like it, doesn't it?

MARISHA: The tops of trees...

SAM: I'll send a message to Yasha. I found a room--

ASHLEY: Oh!

SAM: -- full of trees. You can reply to this message.

ASHLEY: Wha--? She's in a room with lots of trees.

TALIESIN: Well, that's weird.

SAM: Didn't this happen to us once before?

TRAVIS: Yasha, did you say trees?

LIAM: The temple where the fruit is from--

MARISHA: Yeah, speaking of the fruit.

TRAVIS: Oh, the blood fruit.

LAURA: We should head down, too, then. Right?

TRAVIS: How, how. Can you send a message to--?

SAM: Caleb can.

TRAVIS: Or should we just shout down damn thing?

LAURA: I don't want to yell.

ASHLEY: Can you hear us? (laughter)

MATT: You do hear Yasha's voice echo down and above.

SAM: I can hear you. Should I go in or wait for you? You can reply to this message.

TRAVIS: Ask her how far it is.

LAURA: Tell her to wait, tell her to wait.

ASHLEY: I can't s-- wait! (laughter)

LIAM: But the spell lets you whisper back.

ASHLEY: It does?

LIAM: Yeah, briefly.

ASHLEY: Oh, I didn't know that.

SAM: Yeah, you can reply to this message.

TRAVIS: Keep yelling back, it's great. (laughter)

SAM: Yasha, to clarify, you can reply to this message.

MATT: It's like shouting at the grandparent with a hearing aid in. They're like, "No, I can hear you."

TRAVIS: (old person voice) "I said--"

ASHLEY: Okay, uh, wait right there. That's what I'm being told to tell you. Be careful. Just hold on a second.

LAURA: It's a life message. Is like Sending.

LIAM: We can't blame her, this information is in her Blindspot. (laughter)

ASHLEY: (cackles) Okay. What do we do? What do we do?

LAURA: We should head down.

MARISHA: Okay. Let's lower people down.

ASHLEY: Okay. We're going to come down there. I don't know if I can still reply.

SAM: Nope.

ASHLEY: But if I can--

SAM: Nope.

LIAM: I pull out a wire and say: Listen, just stall for 10 minutes. Don't go anywhere. I'm putting up a wire. And I start to ritually cast Alarm and I'm putting up the silver wire at this passageway that we're all going into.

MATT: Okay.

ASHLEY: Should we tie another rope?

LAURA: I'm going to head down.

TRAVIS: The rope?

LAURA: So there's a cleric on both sides.

TRAVIS: The rope?

LAURA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: But h-- do you-- She sees the tops of the trees? Like, is she looking down and it's like hundreds of feet to the tops of trees.

MATT: Looking down--

SAM: 60 feet.

MARISHA: Is there a landing?

MATT: Correct. You can see the tops of trees. Some that are a little bit closer, some that are further away, and some patches are just darkness beyond that you do not-- they're beyond your 60-foot visual range.

TRAVIS: She's fucking up there, bro.

MATT: But, I mean, the closest tree is about maybe 40 feet below you.

MARISHA: Is she on a landing?

MATT: No, she's holding onto a rope.

SAM: Air-conditioning duct--

MARISHA: That's different.

LIAM: Yeah, this is like a nursery in a spaceship.

TRAVIS: She way up.

ASHLEY: Should we tie another rope?

LAURA: Yeah, but I don't think we--

MARISHA: I don't know if we have any more.

TALIESIN: I think I have a rope.

MARISHA: Do we have any more? I know I'm using mine. You're using yours.

LAURA: If you have some, Caduceus, that'd be clutch.

TALIESIN: Apparently don't have a rope?

TRAVIS: Pitons, or what are they called?

SAM: Pitons?

MATT: Yeah, pitons.

SAM: I mean, I can make it to the top of a tree, no problem. But you guys said to wait.

TRAVIS: How many people can you Feather Fall?

TALIESIN: Nope, don't have a rope.

MARISHA: I was going to say, I could slide down the wall. I could maybe get down there.

MATT: Funny bit of a trivia. I learned what pitons were because of 2nd edition D&D. Climber's kits. Because they give you pitons and crampons, which I didn't know what a crampon was, and for the longest time went like-- (laughter)

LAURA: I mean useful, always.

MATT: But, you know.

MARISHA: Good to have a few in your purse for whenever you, you know, aren't expecting things.

LIAM: Is crampon more accurate? (laughter)

MARISHA: Yes. Yes it is.

LAURA: Heck yeah, I feel like.

MATT: That was the problem. Anyway! What are we doing?

TALIESIN: So we can--

LIAM: I could ferry us down, too, if I dropped down the rope a bit and turn it into something. I could carry people up and down.

LAURA: Oh, right.

MARISHA: I mean.

LAURA: It-- yes.

MARISHA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Or we could take the rope a little further down after it's untied and then--

MARISHA: I'm good at-- I'm good at rock climbing and sliding on walls. Let me go.

TRAVIS: Yeah, go for it.

MARISHA: I'll meet Veth down there.

TRAVIS: We'll take the fourth piece of rope as well. So we have 200 feet total.

TALIESIN: I do not have a piece of rope.

LAURA: I feel like I said I already went down.

TRAVIS: Okay.

LAURA: I did already go down. So I'm just holding onto the rope above Veth now. But you can still--

SAM: Oh hi!

LAURA: Hi! You didn't mention that you weren't on the ground yet.

SAM: Oh, well--

LAURA: So, you know.

SAM: Oh, I did, but Yasha just didn't convey it.

MARISHA: As I'm sliding down doing this one, I say: Don't fucking blame it on Yasha, okay? Don't blame your communication problems on her, okay? And then I--

SAM: She intimidates me, that's all.

MARISHA: Well, th-- yeah, same. Okay? (laughter) Same.

SAM: I just find myself tongue tied.

MARISHA: Yeah. Ye--

SAM: Where are you going?

MARISHA: I'm going to try and see how far this is.

LAURA: Are you hanging from my shoulders at this point? Because I feel like you are.

MARISHA: No, I'm hanging from the lip.

MATT: Okay. So here's the thing. This duct is big enough to carry you one at a time.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: Veth is currently the blockage, and then there is Jester, and then you've come in here. There's no way to get around.

MARISHA: Oh, I thought I was trying to squeeze around.

MATT: Not enough room.

SAM: Before you go through. Jester, you're close.

MARISHA: Oh no.

SAM: Where do you sense the ping?

LAURA: Well, the thing is, Caleb took a few minutes to identify this awesome wand-- rod that I'm now holding. So I have no idea where that ping is any more, but--

SAM: So is the goal to get to the tops of these trees? Because I feel like any one of us could do that.

LAURA: I think that's the goal.

SAM: Or I could Feather Fall us all.

MARISHA: I-- uh. You're in the way.

MATT: The rope is dangling free, like-- because you only have a hundred feet of rope, and about 70 or so feet is where you came to this breakage. There's 30 feet going down and it's--

SAM: I'll start climbing down the rope,

LAURA: Oh, well, then I'll keep going.

MATT: So you start climbing down the rope and you get to the end of the rope and you're about 10 feet above the first tree that's beneath you.

LAURA: It looks a lot closer now.

SAM: And it's the top of a tree, so it's not very strong.

TRAVIS: And it's like darkness underneath. Like, it's trees and then darkness.

SAM: You want to do this first or me?

LAURA: Are you hanging on the lip now?

TRAVIS: Could be a sequoia.

MARISHA: We're both hanging from the rope right?

SAM: I let go, and I'm going to try to grab the tree.

MATT: Okay. Go ahead and make an acrobatics check.

LAURA: Oh my god.

TRAVIS: They're not trees.

SAM: 27.

MATT: 27, okay. The tree just splits--

TRAVIS: The thing. (roaring)

MATT: You maneuver yourself a bit to swing and then release, tumble a bit in the air and grab for the top of the tree. They're not pines. It's a little bit of a tangled mass of branches in this canopy. And as you reach and grab for something, it's like hitting a bed of fall time leaves very hard with sticks underneath it. So you hit, grab, and you're like-- (groaning) You do take--

MARISHA: Did you not experience that lie as a kid?

MATT: Four points of bludgeoning damage, just from the impact. But you are now holding into the canopy of the tree. As soon as you hold it and glance around, since there is no light source in here, you're relying on darkvision. You don't get any spectrum of color, but you are seeing that at least the branches are very pale in your darkvision. And the leaves are very dry. Like when you hit and you grab, you don't feel the same flexibility and bounciness that vibrant tree and plant life has. It seems like the branches are just stiff, and the leaves are frail, and just fall away. Like it's petrified.

SAM: Oh, interesting.

MATT: Something like that.

SAM: Okay. I mean, I'm here. Do you want to come or are we waiting for people?

LAURA: Was it a long drop?

SAM: No, it's just 10 feet.

MARISHA: But you're in the tree.

SAM: Yeah, I'm on a tree now.

MARISHA: How tall is the tree? Can you see the bottom?

SAM: Can I see the bottom?

MATT: No.

SAM: Bigger than 60. Oh, and you're blind, aren't you?

MATT: Well, it's not so much that it's bigger than 60. It is too dense for you to look past. You are at the top of a tree, looking through its canopy, and it's too dense for you to see.

SAM: Want me to climb down and see how far it goes?

TRAVIS: Yep, by yourself, go.

LAURA: This is so dumb.

TRAVIS: Adventuring party.

SAM: Why is this dumb?

TRAVIS: Adventuring party. Great! We got it.

MARISHA: Do you want me to try and jump to the tree and then you can go?

SAM: You cannot see.

MARISHA: I can listen to the sound of your voice and have faith.

SAM: You're going to jump, and use your hearing to catch?

TRAVIS: Echo location.

MATT: Daredevil this shit.

MARISHA: Yeah!

LAURA: Can I call up the-- Can I call up the-- whatever that thing is. The tunnel?

MATT: Yeah.

TRAVIS: The chute.

SAM: The AC duct?

LAURA: Yeah, the-- Caleb. We need some light. Use your baubbles.

LIAM: I'm busy with the wire.

TALIESIN: I can head that way.

LIAM: And also I can turn into a giant fucking owl. You crazy people.

LAURA: Oh, so can I.

SAM: I mean, I could just climb down the tree.

MARISHA: I do have the rest of the celebone, if you want to at least see.

LAURA: Oh yeah! I got a celebone!

MARISHA: Here, I crack out the rest of my celebone.

LAURA: You're brilliant.

MARISHA: Crack! And I throw it down.

MATT: You watch as the raves start.

TALIESIN: ♪ (humming upbeat music) ♪

MARISHA: ♪ (beatboxing) ♪

MATT: You catch it, you said?

SAM: Are you throwing it to me, or just dropping it to see how far it goes?

MARISHA: I am blind so--

SAM: Cool, you threw it.

MATT: She threw it.

TRAVIS: Anything that's down there is going to be like (whooshing).

MATT: So you watch now as the celebone, blinking, falls into the canopy, and you hear the sound of it (impacts).

MARISHA: Did you catch it?

SAM: Nope.

MARISHA: Okay.

LAURA: I'll pull out another celebone.

MATT: And you can very faintly see this very, very muted, flashing coloration below the canopy.

TRAVIS: Way down.

MATT: So it did reach a bottom.

MARISHA: Do we see any movement blocking the light? Like cutting into it?

MATT: Oh, there was so much canopy you have no fucking clue. Like, you can just barely make out that there's light down there right now. There's just hints of it. It's like someone had a disco ball in their in their bedroom at another apartment building, and you could just barely tell that there's a light moving.

TRAVIS: Hey monsters, we're over here.

LAURA: I pull out the disco ball right next to us. So I'll pull out another celebone and just hold it like a light stick.

MATT: ♪ (techno beat) ♪ Wherever you guys are.

TRAVIS: Why were we whispering? What was the point of whispering if we're breaking out the fucking rave sticks?

ASHLEY: Yes, hello, Nott, I'm making sure you are okay. Does this work? (laughter)

ASHLEY: She's not talking to me any more. I don't know what's happening.

MATT: She's-- That is hilarious.

ASHLEY: Just think it always works?

MATT: I love it. I love it.

ASHLEY: Hello?

TRAVIS: What's the matter? She doesn't hear you anymore?

ASHLEY: No, I think there's no service.

MATT: Walk 10 feet this way.

TRAVIS: Something's terribly wrong.

ASHLEY: Can you hear me yet? (laughter)

MATT: All right, so you're coming down the tree.

SAM: Stealthily.

MATT: Stealthily?

MARISHA: You keep grabbing your earlobe for no reason.

MATT: Okay.

ASHLEY: What does this mean? I don't know. I thought it would help.

MATT: Make a stealth check with disadvantage.

SAM: Sure.

MARISHA: I think it's better connection.

MATT: Which, because you have advantage anyway with your cloak, it would be just a straight roll. So just--

SAM: Well, I rolled twice.

MATT: Well, roll once, then.

SAM: 27.

MATT: Okay. So you feel confident in the quietness of your descent. Go ahead and make... Go ahead and make an athletics check.

SAM: 24.

MATT: 24 athletics. Nice. You manage to deftly make your way through the clustered mass that is this tree's canopy. The center portion of this tree seems to warp and bend in odd ways and the branches scatter off and tangle. And at the edges of them, you can see them beginning to wrap around and knot with the branches of other nearby trees at different heights. There is something unnatural about this. Make an intelligence check for me.

SAM: Oh boy.

LAURA: Oh no.

SAM: Nine.

MATT: Nine. You keep climbing down

SAM: Weird.

MATT: This is weird. But about 80 or so feet of climbing downward, you find the floor. And as you glance out and look, it's like the floor of an actual forest. It has a soft underbrush and you can see where numerous leaves and elements of vegetation have grown this soft floor between the trunks of this forest. That's about it. You don't see any rocks. It's odd because it looks like a forest, but it's level, like there aren't variations in the hills. It isn't a natural hillside or anything. It is a level floor with a forest landscape built over it, it seems. And you don't see rocks or any other non-tree oriented--

SAM: And the ground is dirt?

MATT: Do you climb all the way to the ground to check?

SAM: (hesitant) Sure.

TRAVIS: It's pitch dark except for her goggles, right?

MATT: Correct.

SAM: Well, there's also a disco ball.

LAURA: And the celebone.

MATT: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Yep.

SAM: I guess when I'm just above the ground, I will cast Mage Hand and dig up some dirt with it.

MATT: Okay. Do so-- There's no dirt necessarily on this top layer. It's mostly compost.

SAM: Compost.

MATT: Though it's very dry. There's no moisture, or at least very little moisture you can even ascertain from this as the Mage Hand pulls it and lets it fall.

SAM: And I'll Mage Hand over to the disco ball, to the celebone and pick it up and just bring it back to me. Do I see anyone watching me or anything?

MATT: Make a perception check with disadvantage because even though you have darkvision, at this distance, you're glancing beyond that range.

SAM: 14.

MATT: 14. You don't see anything.

SAM: Okay. I'll bring the celebone back and sort of shove it in my--

MARISHA: You can turn it off.

SAM: Oh, you can--

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah.

SAM: I don't have these. I'll turn it off.

MATT: All right.

SAM: Okay. I'll cast another message. It might be too far. I'll just cast it to Jester this time. Hey, Jester! It's like we're in this weird, like, man-made garden thing. It's not a real forest, but it is. It's really weird. We need Caduceus down here. He knows about this stuff.

LAURA: Oh, good idea. Did you see if it's actually dirt on the ground? Did you see anybody?

SAM: I saw-- It's sort of weird compost dirt. It's all just super dry. No people.

LAURA: How big are the trees?

SAM: I think they were like 80 feet?

MATT: The one that you went down was about 80 feet, but that was also one of the highest ones here. There are others that are smaller. You saw some as you went down that maybe went closer to 60, some 40 even. The one that you're on right now is an outlier for its height, comparatively.

SAM: 80 feet max.

LAURA: Well, that seems pretty far. Do you hear anything down there?

SAM: Just you, baby.

MARISHA: Are there people? Did you find a village? How big are the trees?

MARISHA: She says that the trees are, you know, like 80 feet. She doesn't see anybody.

MARISHA: That's a big-ass tree.

TALIESIN: Are we rolling yet?

LAURA: But she wants Caduceus.

MARISHA: She wants Caduceus?

LAURA: Yeah, because it's apparently--

MARISHA: Why didn't she want us?

LAURA: -- it's like-- well, because--

MARISHA: I mean we're here.

LAURA: -- we don't know about nature the same way that Caduceus does, you know?

MARISHA: Well, I mean, it's a tree.

LAURA: That's true.

MARISHA: I could look at it and say it's a tree.

LAURA: That's true. I mean, I could say that, too.

MARISHA: Okay. Caduceus is slow as fuck, so while he gets down here, I'm going to go on and go.

SAM: This is the episode we all turn on each other. (laughter)

TRAVIS: It's this cave, you guys!

MARISHA: I'm just saying he's got, like, a staff and his robes and he--

LAURA: Right.

MARISHA: So I'm just going to at least go down there with her.

LAURA: Okay, yeah. She needs help.

MARISHA: So that she's not alone.

LAURA: Be stealthy, but Beau. You're pretty blind.

MARISHA: Yeah, but I've got chroma lights flashing from you.

LAURA: Here, take my celebone.

MARISHA: Okay.

LAURA: Just in case you need another one.

MARISHA: Okay.

LAURA: Okay. I haven't turned it off, so it's just like rave coming from your pocket.

MARISHA: Just, yeah.

LAURA: Okay, you go down. I'm going to just call up through the tunnel again, as quietly, I'm hoping that because it's, like, a tunnel, it'll echo the noise up.

MATT: Okay. What are you doing?

LAURA: (whisper scream) Caduceus! Veth needs you!

TALIESIN: Caleb, how close to--

MATT: I bet this-- I'd say about this time you've finished up.

LIAM: Okay. And you've been up here with me the whole time?

TALIESIN: Yeah

TRAVIS: Me, too.

ASHLEY: Me three.

LIAM: Okay. So the wire's up. We are still pretty close to those two big vats though, right?

MATT: You're-- yeah, about 20 or so feet from them.

LIAM: Yeah. We should go down.

TALIESIN: Yeah. I figured you first, so that you can catch somebody if something stupid happens.

ASHLEY: Veth, we're coming down. I figured maybe you didn't respond because I called you Nott, so we're coming down in just a moment. Please stay safe. (laughter) Okay.

LAURA: Oh! Don't forget to block the entrance!

MATT: You hear a (thumping).

TALIESIN: We've got to move right now.

MATT: You glance over and you can see just in one of the containers that one of the creatures twitched.

TALIESIN: Right now.

MATT: And then goes back to sleep.

ASHLEY: Time to go.

MARISHA: What now?

TALIESIN: Right now! Shh, go, go, go, go, go!

MARISHA: Okay, while they're doing that, I'm going to hop to the tree that I can see in the flashing LED light.

MATT: At the bottom of the rope? Yeah?

MARISHA: And I'm going to (grunting) And then start to... dope monk shit my way down.

MATT: Make an acrobatics check for me as you ♪ (singing dramatic music) ♪

MARISHA: EMS.

TRAVIS: EMS.

MARISHA: Yeah. Okay. 18 total.

MATT: 18.

MARISHA: Sorry.

MATT: Easy enough to do from this distance. You go ahead and land with a bit of a crunch and an impact. Once again, shaking some of these dried leaves free.

MARISHA: I turn off the celebone.

MATT: You would still take two points bludgeoning damage, but you Slow Fall, monk, you're fine.

MARISHA: Slow Fall. Okay. Yeah. Do I see Veth?

MATT: No, Veth is nowhere in sight.

MARISHA: I don't see Veth?

MATT: No.

SAM: 80 feet down.

MARISHA: No, I'm down-- Oh, I'm on the tree.

MATT and SAM: You're on the tree.

MARISHA: Okay. I go the rest of the way down.

MATT: Okay. You go all the way down?

MARISHA: Yeah.

SAM: I'm hiding.

MATT: Yeah. You don't see Veth. You have the light of a rave stick--

MARISHA: (whispered) Veth!

MATT: -- to look by and you don't see Veth anywhere.

MARISHA: And I click it off. (whispered) Veth! I'm here! You bitch. I know you're fucking down here, you bitch. (laughter) (laughter) (laughter)

SAM: I'm going to try stealth and sneak up on her.

MARISHA and TRAVIS: You bitch. (laughter)

SAM: 27.

MATT: She has no idea where you are.

SAM: I'll give her a wet willy.

MARISHA: Come on! (laughter)

MATT: Yeah, you got wet willied.

MARISHA: (frustrated groan)

LIAM: And DM, you described one of those things as waking up and in its little hot tub?

MATT: Or you saw it twitch in there and it just hit the glass tubing and you heard a (thumping).

ASHLEY: Caduceus, I'll hold the rope. Go, go, go.

LIAM: I'm so tempted to fuck with that-- Okay. I start going down the rope.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: I'm next. Guardian of Faith, and I bop out.

TRAVIS: What about the armor? Did you take the armor?

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: So Caduceus is the next one down?

LIAM: Veth took the armor.

TALIESIN: Yeah, after Caleb.

LIAM: Didn't you take the armor?

LAURA: So wait, Caleb is coming down?

SAM: I gave it to you to identify it when you get a chance.

LIAM: Oh, so I got it.

LAURA: I'm still hanging on the rope.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

SAM: Yeah. You don't have to do it now.

LAURA: I was going to help somebody that needs it, but I don't think Caleb needs it.

TALIESIN: So yeah, on the way out, I'm just going to drop this sudden shining armor with a shield with the crest of the Wild Mother on it. And like where the head should be, it's just this glowing amethyst rock. And it's just going to stand in front of the-- about 10 feet away from the-- five feet away from the--

MATT: It just sits there. This quiet sentinel of divine energy.

TRAVIS: What?

LAURA: Nice!

TRAVIS: What is that?

ASHLEY: That is so cool.

MATT: Guardian of Faith.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

LAURA: But somebody is going to block the tunnel, right? Like, to make it look, like, not obvious that we went down a tunnel, like put it-- I've been saying it! I've been saying it.

TRAVIS: Yeah, we're going to grab a bunch of shit and--

LAURA: Like a table or something. (pigeon coo)

LIAM: We just put a glowing guardian in front of the tube.

LAURA: Not in front of the (pigeon coo). Yeah, but not in front of the tunnel.

SAM: The (trilling) tunnel.

TRAVIS: Well, one of us has to hold the rope.

ASHLEY: I'm holding the rope.

TRAVIS: At the top, okay.

ASHLEY: You guys go down and then I'm going to--

TRAVIS: Just slide?

ASHLEY: Get a table over to cover the hole.

TALIESIN: The guardian's not like right in front of it. It's like 10 feet.

LAURA: Yeah, yeah.

LIAM: So here's the deal. I'll go down the rope. I will lower down it hanging above. I will use my transmuter's ability just to turn myself into a giant owl. So I'm now flying around the rope and I will take people down one at a time as they follow after.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: Is there an across, actually?

SAM: Here's my plan, Beauregard.

LIAM: Is there a what?

SAM: You lie down on the ground.

MARISHA: Fuck! What?

SAM: Sorry. I'm right behind you.

MARISHA: Fuck!

SAM: My plan is this. You lie down on the ground--

MARISHA: Can you at least stand in front of me, so I have an audio reference?

SAM: You lie down on the ground. I'll use an image spell to make it look like your head's gone. So when the others come, they're like, "Oh my gosh, she fucking died!"

MARISHA: Oh, like-- okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

SAM: You'll see who likes you and who doesn't really care.

MARISHA: That's a weird ulterior motive. I was just here for the prank of it. And then you made it--

SAM: All right. We don't have to do it.

MARISHA: It's a good prank, though.

SAM: It is a good prank.

MARISHA: Let's workshop it. It's a first draft.

MATT: As you all begin to bunch up, what is this rope affixed to, by the way? Now that you all have--

LIAM: Just Yasha.

MATT: -- crawled into it. So Yasha, you're the last one holding it? So you're holding the rope for now it is like three or four people dangling from it where you turn into an owl and begin to carry people down.

LAURA: Yeah. And then--

LIAM: Yeah, one at a time for Fjord and Caduceus. And that just leaves me flying beneath the hole in the ceiling and going for the slip and slide.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

LAURA: I guess I got help, too, because I was just dangling from the rope this whole time.

LIAM: No, I let you fall.

MATT: Okay. So you do notice--

LIAM: I thought she went down already.

MATT: -- the rope is no longer holding any weight. It is free of anybody else, it seems. What would you like to do?

ASHLEY: Okay, can I try to cover up the hole that we're in with, like, a table or something?

MATT: Correct. Are you taking the rope up, or are you anchoring it to something?

ASHLEY: I'm going to take the rope up.

MATT: Okay. So you pull the rope back up and you pack it away.

ASHLEY: Yeah. And then sort of try to get...

MATT: There's plenty of debris here to pull and try and, you know--

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: -- wedge into that space a bit.

ASHLEY: Cover it up, yeah.

MATT: Pardon, yeah.

LAURA: As you like--

ASHLEY: And then--

LAURA: -- fall down the hole.

ASHLEY: Yeah, it's okay. I'm going to start shimmying down the hole.

MATT: Okay. It is a tight enough space to the point where you have a little more resistance than most would. I will say, because this is-- Roll an athletics and/or acrobatics check on this one.

ASHLEY: Okay. Natural 20.

TRAVIS: Oh yeah.

MATT: Without issue. We're like-- this is like a reverse Bishop in Aliens. Where you're in that tight space and just working your way down as you go. About 70 or so feet before you begin to look over and you can see where the duct comes to an end abruptly and where that opening space is. And as you get towards it, you're able to wedge your arms on the side and glance over and you can see below (fluttering) the flying owl that is Caleb.

ASHLEY: Psst. (hooting)

LIAM: (hooting)

ASHLEY: Ready?

LIAM: (hooting)

MATT: It's a heavy impact for you, but you manage to right yourself for the most part.

LIAM: (panting)

MATT: All right. With that, you've all been lowered down into the trees and you all begin to slowly climb down to meet, I assume on the bottom, beneath the canopy or are you staying in the tree?

LAURA: Well, they're already at the bottom. I assume the bottom.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: Come on down, guys, we're all here waiting.

ASHLEY: Climbing down.

TALIESIN: All right.

MATT: So you all climb down. Do you revert form?

LIAM: I think I'll stay in the branches above them.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: For the moment.

MATT: So you stay just flying in the space here, and as you like fly around, you get a view of the space. The chamber is over a hundred feet tall. And as you begin to peruse and scan the tops of this strange, man-made, subterranean, now arboretum, hundreds of feet from side to side, probably anywhere from 250 to 300 feet from one end to the other, but it is this gradual domed arboretum-like chamber, a contained interior forest. Caduceus, what catches you odd and makes you feel the shiver down your spine as you climb through this tree, is the way that it's twisting, the coloration of the leaves and the branches: Very reminiscent of the Savalirwood, specifically the corrupted portions of it. It's oddly welcoming because it reminds you of home, but it's the least-- the least thing you would expect this far from it.

TALIESIN: And it's the worst thing to see, right? The worst part of home to see right now.

MATT: Yeah.

TALIESIN: We've seen this before.

TRAVIS: Where?

TALIESIN: Savalirwood.

MARISHA: Your home?

TALIESIN: It's so similar, but something's very wrong. They're dead, right? These things are just fucking dead.

MATT: If you want to try and inspect, could make a nature check.

TALIESIN: Why a nature check, damn it?

MATT: Because this is understanding of nature.

TALIESIN: I'll wait. It's just freaking me out. Until we're on the other side.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: Stuff's just hitting me wrong.

LAURA: Do you want me to try to talk to them?

TALIESIN: No, not yet.

MARISHA: What is it?

TALIESIN: It's just-- This is just casting a shadow on me. I'm not ready to look at this yet. Let's get a little further in.

MATT: Okay. You all, except for Caleb, gather at the base of the tree and you now stand in the midst of this lightless, oddly level forest. You can see quite a bit ahead as the canopy ends anywhere between eight to 10 feet above you, and since it is a level field, aside from the occasional or the eventual blockade of overlapping trunks, it just looks like an endless row of semi-natural columns that themselves warp and twist a bit before they climb up into the cluster of branches and leaves. Your feet hitting the floor has a soft spongy feel almost as you step across the underbrush. You feel the cracks of fallen branches and twigs of long-dried and partially decayed vegetation. But you sense the decay here is somewhat stunted. There isn't enough moisture and enough specific nutrients to maintain the sort of fungus or continued cycle of decomposition, which sets you off as well.

TALIESIN: Detect Undead.

MATT: No undead.

TALIESIN: All right.

MATT: Which brings you some comfort. Glancing about, there are a lot of elements of this, the layer of the trees, the shape they're taking. It feels like you're in a weird parallel version of the Savalirwood.

TALIESIN: I know it's about 300 feet, how far? I figure like three quarters into it, I'll try and talk to one of these.

MATT: Which direction are you guys going? You're in the center of the chamber, of a large circular room.

TRAVIS: Wait, it's dark, right?

LAURA: I can cast-- Yes, it's very dark.

TRAVIS: Let's light it up.

TALIESIN: I've got a little light going on.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: Can I cast Locate Object at a higher level?

MATT: Yeah. You can cast any spell at a higher level. It doesn't necessarily mean it has a higher effect, but you can burn the spell slot to still use a lower level spell.

LAURA: Yeah, I'll try. I'll do another one. Fuck, I'm using a lot, but I'll do another Locate Object.

MATT: Okay. Closing your eyes and concentrating you-- Between the darkness that is your closed eyelids, you see that green glow of the Traveler's presence begin to swerve and then draw your attention off the right-hand side of the path you guys were traveling. And as soon as you glance over, and open your eyes, you can see that green glow has become a faint blue. And you know that direction is tugging you towards the threshold crest that you were seeking.

LAURA: It's over there.

SAM: Let's go.

MATT: All right. Are you all traveling standard speed?

SAM: Stealthily.

MATT: Stealthily? All right. Everyone make a group stealth check for me.

LAURA: Blessing of the Trickster--

MATT: Except for Caleb, who is flying around.

LAURA: -- to Fjord.

TRAVIS: What does that give me?

LAURA: Advantage on stealth rolls.

TRAVIS: Thank.

LIAM: Is the tree cover too thick to be flying like 20 or 30 feet above or would I just be in the branches?

MATT: You would just be in the branches at that point. It is-- All the trees are... And it's odd, the more you look at it, their pattern of placement is not random like a normal forest. It is geometric. They are all spaced intentionally from each other. So their canopies all collide pretty intensely.

LIAM: Okay.

TRAVIS: 14.

MATT: 14. Jester?

LIAM: All right, I'll drop it.

LAURA: Eight.

MATT: Eight.

SAM: 25.

ASHLEY: 23.

TALIESIN: 20.

MARISHA: 20.

LIAM: 20.

MATT: Okay. Okay. So eventually Caleb catches up with you and you all together began quietly, slowly, but quietly making your way in the direction that Jester is leading. Moving through, looking from right to left because of that odd geometric placement, it does feel like intentional columns, to a certain degree, because of that continued pattern. As you maneuver and keeping your eyes peeled, nothing else seems to move. No other sounds beyond the crunching of your feet, even as careful as you are, pressing forward into this dark expanse. After a bit of travel, you begin to see the far walls of this arboretum begin to approach. There in the stone, you can see these carved arches that are more just there for design purposes, but one of these arches is open. It is a hallway entrance. And you know this to be the likely direction you should travel. This hall is two by two. So you would have to travel in pairs. Who would be the first pair in this marching order?

LIAM: Is there no writing on the outside of this archway?

MATT: There would be writing. Do you still have--

LIAM: It lasts an hour, so I'd have 30 or 40 minutes left.

MATT: Right. And it's not concentration, correct?

LIAM: No.

MATT: So yeah. You read it. It reads "Threshold Vault."

MARISHA: Threshold Vaults.

SAM: Pretty clear.

MARISHA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Maybe vault means lounge.

SAM: ♪ Two by two! ♪

LAURA: Caduceus, have you ever tried talking to the corrupted plants in the Savalir?

TALIESIN: No, I... I think I'll I'll try once we're all in the tunnel.

LAURA: Okay.

TALIESIN: I'm worried.

LAURA: Do you want me to try, too?

TALIESIN: If you could be there as well, that might be a good idea.

LAURA: Okay.

MARISHA: Why did you never try talking to them?

TALIESIN: I don't know. Things are different now. Once everybody's in--

TRAVIS: We're here, yeah.

TALIESIN: I'm not touching them, either. If you can hear me, I am so sorry. And if we can help, we will.

LAURA: I'm going to cast Speak with Plants from the necklace.

LAURA: I'm going to cast Speak with Plants from the necklace.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: And see if we can hear anything back. I'll just reiterate what Caduceus said as well.

MATT: Okay. You convey this message to what you think is likely going to be nothing to respond. But as you speak to the first tree, you sense a fragment of his essence reach out back to you in return. And while, much like the language of trees are wordless and but a series of slow emotions and thought, and but a series of slow emotions and thought, this comes to you nothing but malevolent hunger, and desperation. this comes to you nothing but malevolent hunger, and desperation. It reaches towards you, and it's like pulling your hand back from a hole filled with insects. You are repulsed by the emotion that tries to connect to you. This (wheezing) And as you withdraw, you almost like slap the pouch away that you utilized to make this connection. There is still life in these trees, though nowhere near the semblance that you've grown accustomed to.

TALIESIN: No, let's... We're done. Let's move. That's enough.

LIAM: I'm going to quietly nudge my way to the front if we're going into this tunnel. I'm going to throw up Detect Magic with Comprehend Languages still going because both can be happening, and I'm going to apparate Frumpkin down in front of me and say: Just 20 feet up, quiet as you can.

MATT: Got it. All right. Who's with Caleb at the front?

TRAVIS: I'll go with Caleb at the front.

MATT: All right. You got Fjord and Caleb. Who's after them?

SAM: Should have Jester close to the front so she can point the way? Right?

LAURA: Sure. Yeah, I'll go behind them.

MATT: Okay. And who's next to Jester?

SAM: I'll go next to Jester to protect her.

MATT: All right.

LAURA: Thank you, Veth.

MATT: And then Caduceus would be in the rear, so probably would Beau and Yasha after that.

SAM: Unless, Fjord, you'd like to.

TALIESIN: I'll be keeping an eye behind us.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: Caleb's eyes are just wide as saucers trying to see any writing, any arcane sigilry anything that is bad for us.

MATT: So. Different from the metallic rectangular hallways that you traveled through by the laboratories, down here, the hallway has a natural stone feel. It has a simple elven flair to its curved arched ceiling above you. And occasionally it's segmented with a decorative rib that travels from side to side over top. This area seems to carry a little more of an aesthetically pleasing presence. of an aesthetically pleasing presence. This hall, as you step into the cold marble floor echoes. (footsteps) You instinctually keep quiet and be careful, keeping eyes out. You don't see any writing. You don't see any labels. A little ways ahead, you begin to see a T-intersection where another hall intersects with this. And as this hall continues onward, you can see a set of stairs that descends. And since it is lightless beyond the light that you carry with you into this chamber, Caduceus, you do see a faint, familiar blue glow, barely visible just beyond the stairway ahead of you.

TALIESIN: There you go.

TRAVIS: And the stairway is beyond the intersection?

MATT: Correct.

LIAM: So there's a left and a right, but we can pass that.

MATT: Yes.

LIAM: Towards stairs, okay.

LAURA: And my spell is guiding us--

MATT: Guiding you across and down the stairs.

LAURA: Okay.

TALIESIN: Careful for traps.

LIAM: I place my hand on Fjord's shoulder and go into Frumpkin's vision. And just have Frumpkin (footsteps) up to the intersection and look both ways.

MATT: Okay. Go ahead and roll perception for Frumpkin.

TRAVIS: Come on.

LIAM: Just look, cat! Just look! That is a 13.

MATT: 13. Don't see anything one way or the other.

LIAM: Okay.

TRAVIS: Just darkness?

MATT: Just darkness.

LIAM: Okay. So far, so good.

LAURA: And you saw the blue light down?

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: Yeah, so there's the intersection straight ahead, and the stairs descend downward and you see a faint, a little bit of blue light coming up from beyond the stairs.

TALIESIN: We're both on track.

LAURA: Okay.

TRAVIS: And as Caleb and I come up to that intersection--

MATT: Does Frumpkin traverse the intersection?

LIAM: No. Waits there.

MATT: Okay. So Frumpkin just waits there.

LIAM: You want to look right, I'll look left?

TRAVIS: Sure.

LIAM: Okay. We have better investigation than Frumpkin, so I'm going to look up the left hallway here.

TRAVIS: Yeah, we do like the one eye.

LIAM: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Around the barrier, slicing the pie.

LIAM: Detect Magic still up, writing, all that.

MATT: Right, yeah. Detect Magic. As you approach towards that intersection, you sense a faint magical barrier that can entirely encompasses that T-section hallway ahead of you.

LIAM: Okay. So before we even get there that I catch that vibe.

MATT: Mm-hmm.

LIAM: Okay. Is there a school connected to it?

MATT: This would also be Abjuration.

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: I imagine so; let me double check.

SAM: So, like, we can't go forward?

LIAM: Well, something will happen.

SAM: Oh.

TALIESIN: Is there are Dispel Magic in the house?

LIAM: Yeah, there is.

MATT: Sorry, Evocation is what you would get from this.

LIAM: Evocation? Even better. I will cast Dispel at 4th-level.

MATT: At 4th-level. Okay. Go ahead and roll a d10 and add your intelligence modifier.

LIAM: D... d10?

MATT: Sorry, d20 (blows raspberry).

LIAM: Total of 16.

MATT: 16. As you concentrate, try your best to extend your intellect to unravel whatever weave holds this barrier ahead of you. Inspirational cleverness hits your mind and you envision anchor points beyond this intersection, hoping this wall is not infinite, and if there are anchor points, it means there's a weakness where the two meet, and that's what holds this wall in place. As you release the Dispel Magic, you watch as the barrier vanishes ahead.

SAM: Cool. Nice.

MARISHA: Okay.

SAM: Excellent.

TRAVIS: Well done.

LAURA: Nice, Caleb.

LIAM: Okay. Inch a little closer and do what we planned?

TRAVIS: Mm-hmm.

LIAM: Okay.

LAURA: ♪ Inch a little closer ♪

TRAVIS: I'll actually summon the sword as well and (whooshing) kick it off.

MATT: The light glows now. You have multiple light sources helping even further your vision in this space. And now that you have more light and you glance up, you can see the heavy cracks that run through the stonework of this hallway. Everything here, even in its beauty, still has sustained severe structural damage from the impact of Aeor long ago. And now that you have that visual perspective with your sword now lighting it up even further, further instills the question of just how well this all will continue to stand and for how long.

TRAVIS: Hmm.

MATT: But--

MARISHA: And we're just still in the hallway. No chambers, just--

MATT: Just a long hallway.

LIAM: Left and right. And forward and down.

MARISHA: And forward and down, right.

TRAVIS: Yeah, we're doing the--

LIAM: Fjord and Caleb are going to do--

TRAVIS: Yeah, we're going to slice the pie.

MATT: You're getting the sense that a lot of this city, at least the areas you've seen, have had open, open regions, but the open regions have been buried and covered and so what remains are enclosed chambers and the halls that connect them. So what's left is this odd labyrinth of things that have-- structures and chambers that have resisted the weight and test of time. So you approach the intersection. You cross, there's no barrier, no issue.

TRAVIS: Is it just darkness in each direction?

MATT: Darkness in each direction.

TRAVIS: How far can your globules go?

LIAM: Well. Well, well, well. If I do globules, I can't sense any magical threats. I will lose one so.

TRAVIS: I could just (whooshing) one in each direction.

SAM: Sure.

TALIESIN: Between the two of us, we should be fine.

ASHLEY: Hey, um. I can make light.

SAM: What?! Let's see it.

TALIESIN: Prove it. (laughter)

ASHLEY: Foom!

TALIESIN: Where have you been keeping that?

ASHLEY: I just realized I had it. (laughter) I was like, "Am I looking at this correctly?"

MATT: Yeah, that's right.

ASHLEY: It just says--

LAURA: You have Light? You have the Light cantrip?

ASHLEY: Yeah. I have the Light cantrip.

MATT: As part of being aasimar.

ASHLEY: Not sure how I missed that this whole campaign.

TRAVIS: Awesome.

MATT: I always figured--

TALIESIN: You can like pop it on anything.

ASHLEY: I can pop it on something?

MATT: On objects, yeah. Like glove, or your sword, or something like that.

MARISHA: Comes with the textbook.

ASHLEY: Yeah, I'll pop it at the end of my sword.

MATT: All right. So the front of the sword begins to glow.

LAURA: Nice.

ASHLEY: It's like a flashlight.

LAURA: Yasha, that's clutch!

MARISHA: That's really cool.

LIAM: I should have thought of that. (whooshing) Fire in my hand.

MARISHA: Look at you. You're a trendsetter.

ASHLEY: I-- Thanks.

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: With the additional light and with the sword out there as well, you can see that both sides of this hall end about 35, 40 or so feet beyond on each side, and you can make out, with what light you have, that there are detailed glyphs carved into the top and bottom of each of these sides, which you envision would be the anchor points for this wall that was previously there.

TALIESIN: Okay.

LAURA: Let's keep going. Let's take out this crest.

TRAVIS: We'll go to the stairs.

LAURA and MATT: All right.

MATT: Stepping down the staircase, the familiar blue light begins to fill the chamber before you, as you come to a nearly identical room as to the one that you previously found in the ruins of A5.

MARISHA: Oh.

MATT: The same stairs that descend into a somewhat round chamber, the somewhat curved balcony to the right and left with some faint railing where it descends curve-- where stairs curve around it into the center of the chamber or there's the central stairs that go to the middle. You see the large, carved, faintly glowing glyphs that reach across from the center of the floor, to the far wall and up the wall, and there, atop and in the center, you see embedded, the large, glowing, blue threshold crest.

SAM: We got it.

MATT: And that's where we'll pick up next time. (groaning)

TRAVIS: Not yet, we're don't.

MATT: (chuckles) We'll pick up from there next time as you guys have located your second threshold vault.

SAM: Are we going to break it or take it?

TALIESIN: We can't break that thing.

LAURA: I feel like we should try to break it.

TALIESIN: It's magical.

LAURA: If we take it they can take it from us. We should destroy it.

SAM: No, we should take it because then it's a bargaining chip.

LAURA: No! They're going to kill us and take it.

SAM: Then it means we might get to see the city come.

MARISHA: Shit, I have so much more I want to do.

TALIESIN: Break the armor first--

TRAVIS: We'll decide, we'll decide.

MATT: You got time, you got time to figure out what you're going to do while we await our next episode.

MARISHA: Fuck! Okay.

MATT: All righty. Well. Thank you all for joining us tonight. We will see you next week. Don't forget we love you very much. And is it Thursday yet? Good night.