Transcript:Long May He Reign

List of Transcripts

Pre-Show
MATT: Hello everyone, and welcome to tonight's episode of Critical Role, where a bunch of us nerdy-ass voice actors sit around and play Dungeons & Dragons.

ALL: (discordant yelling) We play Dungeons & Dragons!

MATT: Before we get into our session this evening, we do have some announcements to get through, beginning with the first of our two sponsors, Fandom/D&D Beyond. Sam.

TRAVIS: D&D Beyond!

SAM: To roll on the table, your soul must be able.

MATT: Oh no.

SAM: To get rid of emotional baggage, and your life will be at advantage. Wow. It doesn't take a perfect 10 to roll a natural 20. These are some of my brilliant words of wisdom that have helped millions fully realize their D&D rolltential. Hi, I'm Nathaniel "Nat" Twenty, a tabletop motivational speaker, mutant dice creature, and author of Dodeca-Heal Yourself. And tonight, the universe is giving you the Luck feat, because this episode is sponsored by our friends at Fandom Gaming and D&D Beyond, who are running a giveaway on their Twitter for their legendary bundle. That's all 41 official fifth edition D&D digital source books and adventure books, including our own Explorer's Guide to Wildemount. How do you win? Just share your customized character sheet in their Twitter feed. You can create that character sheet in four ways, your portrait, your frame, your theme, or your backdrop. Details and entry at DnDBeyond.link/Twitter Now it sounds easy, but what if your beefy barbarian is boring? What if your stats are more like status quo? What if you've got an imperfect warlock? Well, my new book will solve all those problems. I call it, No More Bull Sheet, How to Put the Playa in Player Character.

MATT: Oh my god.

SAM: An empoweringly expensive 42-part system, that can turn your pallid paladin into a holy damn. Let's see how it works. Everyone around the table has a worksheet in front of them. Each one costs $25, but don't worry, I already charged your credit cards. Ashley. Okay. Hard facts. Yasha needs some zazz. Let's spruce her up with a new character name. I want you to write down your mother's maiden name.

ASHLEY: Okay, I'm gonna-- Okay.

SAM: Great. Now for Yasha's personal wellness modifier, let's use the last four digits of your social security number. (laughter)

ASHLEY: Um! Nat 20, is this some sort of scam?

SAM: How dare you! I'm just helping you take the ass out of ass-imar, and achieve your gaming gratification. Laura, I'm going to be real right now. Jester is basic.

LAURA: Wow.

SAM: But you can take your drab healer, and really feel-her with my new worksheet. Let's visualize a new look. Start by writing down your Gmail password and ATM pin.

LAURA: Nat 20, this is absurd.

SAM: Absurdly easy. And I can tell you more for just $3,000.

SPEAKER VOICE: Nat Roberts, this is the FBI. We have an arrest warrant of federal embezzlement and wire fraud--

SAM: Oh no!

SPEAKER VOICE: Take off the dice costume and surrender.

SAM: Uh-oh. That's my cue to roll on out of here. Remember, find out more and enter to win the contest at DnDBeyond.link/Twitter and maybe don't mention that you know me, okay?

SPEAKER VOICE: Release the K9 unit.

SAM: Oh! Don't wait for a nat 20, one's waiting for you. Back to you, Matt!

MATT: Jeez. Thank you, Sam, d20 guy. And thank you, D&D Beyond. (laughter) Second sponsor for tonight, our friends at Elder Scrolls Online. This episode is sponsored by Bethesda and ZeniMax Online Studios, and their 2021 release of Elder Scrolls Online: Blackwood--

LAURA: Woo!

MATT: -- which uncovers the schemes of Mehrunes Dagon 800 years before the events of Elder Scrolls IV. So feel free to jump in and join the 18 million players that explore the ever-growing world of ESO, and get caught up on their year-long adventure that includes the Blackwood Chapter release, and multiple DLCs to come thereafter. Blackwood comes out on June 1st for PC, Mac, and Stadia, and June 8th for Xbox One, Xbox Series X, PS4, and PS5. And the first DLC, Flames of Ambition, is out now, so go grab it and get caught up. You can check out everything about this now at elderscrollsonline.com/buy. B-U-Y. Got some other announcements. Marisha, you're up.

MARISHA: Oh, yes. Hello.

MATT: Hi.

MARISHA: Thank you so much for joining us live on Twitch and YouTube. To join our live and moderated chat, please head over to our Twitch channel. Ding. More announcements on next page. Tomorrow, Laura Bailey and Liam O'Brien continue their Elder Scrolls Online playthrough as Lex and Lax, for another episode of EverythingIsContent, sponsored by our friends at Bethesda and ZeniMax Online Studios. Watch the stream tomorrow, that's Friday, May 28th at 4:00pm Pacific on Twitch, or the VOD on YouTube this Sunday, May 30th.

LAURA: That's our birthday.

LIAM: Yeah.

MARISHA: (gasps) Oh, that's right! Happy birthday!

LIAM: Yeah!

LAURA: (laughs)

MARISHA: Wish them a happy birthday in the chat, or you suck. (laughter)

LIAM: Whoa.

TRAVIS: The chat's just-- (laughter)

MARISHA: That's it. That's all mine.

MATT: There you go. Awesome. Speaking of Laura, Laura, you got some things to talk about.

LAURA: Well, I just got this one little thing to say.

TRAVIS: Uk'otoa!

LAURA: Uk'otoa!

SAM: Uk'otoa!

LAURA: Is available right now. It's our first game, I'll hold it lower, from Darrington Press. (whooping) So I'm just going to tell you, this semi-cooperative board game, you'll play factions of sailors trying to be the last to survive the great leviathan, Uk'otoa.

SAM: (whispering) Uk'otoa.

LAURA: As your ship splinters into the ocean, the tension heightens, ooh, and alliances crumble. You can get your very own copy of Uk'otoa right now at Critical Role online shops, as well as Darrington Press Guild stores.

SAM: So, it's a dating sim?

TRAVIS: Yeah, the tone of the spot changed a couple of times.

LIAM: It is tentacle-based, so I don't know if that's the tone to strike.

LAURA: Maybe check it out and go find out what kind of game it is for yourself. But it'll also be available shortly at other local game stores across the US, and obviously, we highly support you supporting your local game stores, so.

TRAVIS: Yeah. That is amazing.

MATT: Awesome. Thank you so much, Laura. And Ashley, you got something to talk about.

ASHLEY: Hey. Here we go. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Not nervous. You're not nervous.

ASHLEY: So thank you so much for your support of our Critical Role Foundation fundraising campaign for our friends at 826LA. (whooping)

MATT: Yeah!

ASHLEY: I'm going to save it. So, since we're prerecording the show, the best way to catch real-time fundraising updates is by following us at @CriticalRoleFDN on Facebook or Twitter. (laughter) To learn more about our campaign to build a writers' room for students at Venice High School here in Los Angeles, or to donate, head on over to criticalrolefoundation.org.

TRAVIS: Give it love, give it love!

ASHLEY: Give it some love!

MATT: Give it some love, everyone. Thank you so much, Ashley, and thank you so much for your wonderful support of this endeavor, 826, and our foundation in general. Come on, let's make it happen. All righty.

TRAVIS: No!

LAURA: No, no, no!

MATT: I believe that's the end of our announcements, y'all, so--

TRAVIS: We need more announcements to make!

LIAM: Help, help!

ASHLEY: ♪ You got the imperfect warlock! ♪

TRAVIS: My chair is wet.

MATT: Let's go ahead and jump into--

TRAVIS: My chair.

MATT: Tonight's episode of...

ASHLEY: I don't want it.

LIAM: Stop.

MATT: Critical Role. (terrified screaming)

(water bubbling)

(thunder rumbling)

(explosion)

♪ Role, Critical Role ♪

♪ Role, Critical Role ♪

♪ Role, Critical Role ♪

♪ Role, Critical Role ♪

♪ Role, Critical Role ♪

♪ Role, Critical Role ♪

♪ Roll the dice ♪

♪ The adventure begins ♪

♪ They were always beside you ♪

♪ Your nerdy best friends ♪

♪ And the DM to guide you ♪

♪ And they rise from the flames for the battles ahead ♪

♪ Villains beware because you're about to be dead ♪

♪ They got magic and flair ♪

♪ They got falchions and cunning ♪

♪ They don't see over there ♪

♪ There's a monster incoming ♪

♪ Inspiration is waiting, rise up, don't think twice ♪

♪ Put your fate in your hands, take a chance, ♪

♪ roll the dice ♪

♪ Roll the dice ♪

♪ Critical Role (roll the dice) ♪

♪ Critical Role (roll the dice) ♪

♪ Ooh, ahh ♪

♪ Can you answer the call ♪

♪ Diggin' deep in your soul ♪

♪ As the legend unfolds ♪

♪ Now it's your turn (your turn, your turn) ♪

♪ to roll ♪

(flames whooshing)

Part I
MATT: And welcome back. So last we left off--

LAURA: Oh god.

MATT: The Mighty Nein had made their way to the living city of Cognouza, where the Somnovem have existed, and called out to the Nonagon, and now you. Upon meeting the Somnovem Omega, their combined consciousness, in itself the nexus, the consciousness of all those who once lived in the Cognouza Ward, as you spoke, Lucien, utilizing your distraction, seemed to assail them with a cluster of intuit charges, and as you fled, hearing his laughter in the distance, you returned to find what remained of the Somnovem, and Lucien ascending up into the city of flesh itself. You absconded to the surface to find out what or how you are going to deal with this, and there you found a newly-reborn Lucien, combined with the Somnovem, the eyes of the Eyes of Nine protruding from various stalks from his body. He seemed to be pontificating with you about his newly-acquired existence and understanding, and then grew extremely angry when he realized that you had prevented him from jumping the city to the Prime Material Plane like he had planned to at this moment, upon which, in the rooftops above the city of Cognouza, you did battle, flying around on the threads of the Astral Sea, blasting with spells, diving for cover, and damaging, trying to take down this new form of Lucien. Upon taking a bit of damage, he decided to head back into the center of the city, but not before leaving you all with a number of newly-exposed eyes, as many of you have begun to find red eyes of the Somnovem newly emblazoned upon your bodies. In that brief moment, you give chase down through the hole to the center, and there, you find yourself amongst a partially-ruined city, stone structures, towers, buildings, and writhing, fleshy masses that they liquefy into, as you now sit at the very center, the very core of Cognouza itself. As you all descend into this chamber, tell me where you are at the moment, please.

SAM: Matt, do we see any magic shops or potion dealers around?

MATT: Make a perception check.

SAM: Hmm, 13.

MATT: No, no, you do not. Fjord, where would you like to be?

TRAVIS: Ah! Don't start with me! I would like to be--

LAURA: I'd like to be.

TRAVIS: Can I be right here?

MATT: Yes, hiding behind there? So kind of low to the ground?

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MATT: You got it.

ASHLEY: Oh god.

TRAVIS: Assuming that the party's over here.

MATT: So right there?

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MATT: All righty.

LAURA: Yeah, because you said Lucien--

TRAVIS: We don't know. We're going to see him last.

LAURA: No, no, no, but you said when we came down, we saw him. He was--

MATT: You saw something in the ground that was growing. I'm getting us to that point, so you guys are placed where you want to be placed before you know where and how this happened.

LAURA: I understand.

MATT: So my narrative end to the last episode is now being rewound and reintroduced for the sake of the strategic placement of this battle.

TRAVIS: Actually, I take it back, I want to be right here.

MATT: Be over there?

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MATT: On the ground as well?

TRAVIS: Right there.

TALIESIN: Are we still flyable?

MATT: You assume so, since you're all flying down into the chamber.

TRAVIS: You fucking assume so.

MATT: Caduceus, where would you like to be?

TRAVIS: (sobs)

TALIESIN: That's what I get, I suppose.

TRAVIS: Did you hear that, Ashley?

ASHLEY: No, I'm-- no. What did you say?

MATT: Caduceus, where would you like to be?

TALIESIN: I would like to be--

TRAVIS: There's nothing to think about yet. Where were you?

TALIESIN: In between the little, weird, bulbous--

ASHLEY: Panic?

TALIESIN: -- bulbous thing, and--

TRAVIS: Shake it out.

TALIESIN: Yeah, and the-- yeah.

TRAVIS: Here we go.

MATT: So right here?

TALIESIN: Yeah, just in the corner right there.

MATT: Over here?

TRAVIS: "Did you hear that, Ashley?" "No."

TALIESIN: It's bouncing.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

MARISHA: That's the best doing Ashley.

TALIESIN: Yeah, near that coral reef thing, between the bulb and the coral reef.

ASHLEY: What do I need doing?

MATT: Over here, you mean?

TALIESIN: Yeah, you're good there.

LAURA: I don't think anything yet.

TRAVIS: Nothing.

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: Jester, where would you like to be?

TRAVIS: We don't know if we can fly.

LAURA: I'm going to have floated down, and I'm going to be on the dome with the little spike over here, yeah.

MATT: Okay, on top of the dome?

LAURA: On top of the dome.

MATT: You've got it.

TALIESIN: ♪ On top of the dome ♪

MARISHA: Ah.

MATT: Let me just-- takes a little bit of--

LAURA: A little stickies?

MATT: A little putty on you.

LAURA: Thanks.

MATT: Good there, all righty. Veth, where would you like to be?

SAM: I mean, we all descended sort of together, right?

LAURA: Yeah.

SAM: Ish?

MATT: You all descended together, and you found your placement as you begin to take in the scene below, so.

SAM: I think I would be, maybe, in front of Jester, near that-- I don't want to be crude, but penis-looking thing.

MATT: (laughs) Sure. Do you want to be closer to the ground, higher up?

TRAVIS: Penii.

SAM: Yeah, maybe right there's good, just 10 feet off the ground seems good.

MATT: Okay, you've got it. All right, finishing Veth's placement.

LAURA: Veth, that's a big dick.

MATT: Beauregard.

MARISHA: And we don't see Lucien anywhere yet?

SAM: I've seen bigger.

MATT: There is something in the center of this area on the ground that is gently glowing and shifting.

MARISHA: All right, am I seeing-- No. This weird little pillar thing? I'll go near that.

MATT: Okay, do you want to be on the ground, or still floating, 10, 20 feet up? What do you want?

MARISHA: I'll still float 10 feet up.

MATT: 10 feet up? Okay.

LAURA: (squeals)

MARISHA: Do we get an action here? Or we're just being placed?

MATT: I mean, if you want to take an action as you're getting down there, you can.

MARISHA: Yeah, I'm going to pull out the other field generator and crack it, and throw it into the center of this mess.

SAM: Amazing.

LAURA: Oh yeah, I would definitely, if we can do that as we're coming down, I would've Invoked Duplicity again, my last one.

MATT: Okay, where would you like your duplicate to be? On the other side of where I am. I imagine I would've invoked her as we came in, and she would've floated down to the opposite, yeah.

TALIESIN: That dome.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: This dome over here?

LAURA: She's got to be within 130 feet of me, so.

MATT: Got you. So whereabouts?

LAURA: (vocalizing) ♪ I can't find-- ♪ What about right there? Can you see where I'm putting it?

MATT: About here?

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: (vocalizing)

SAM: I would've cast Mage Hand, if we get an action.

MATT: Certainly. Let me go ahead and find a hand for you.

SAM: Just nice to have.

MATT: Just to have it out?

SAM: Mm-hmm.

MATT: Okay.

ASHLEY: Are we floating, or are we on fleshy bits?

SAM: If you would've been paying attention--

ASHLEY: We're floating. I know, I know.

MATT: You can be floating, if you'd like, or, like in instances of Fjord, who's on the ground, or Jester, who's on the dome. Some people are floating, some people are coming to rest. There is gravity, if you choose to accept it, or you can continue to fly. Which, on that note, where would you like to be, Yasha?

ASHLEY: Okay. I think I'll get at the end of that spiral staircase thing, at the end of those little rocks.

MATT: Floating or on the ground?

ASHLEY: (groans) I'm going to float.

MATT: You're going to float? 10 feet up, 20 feet?

ASHLEY: 10.

TRAVIS: It's good, it's good.

ASHLEY: Going with the 10.

TRAVIS: Solid.

ASHLEY: Yeah. (groans)

MATT: Pardon me while I get this set up here real fast. Just getting you all to the heights you wanted.

TRAVIS: No, no, take your time.

MATT: In this tense moment of setup. So about there, you said?

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MATT: Okay. Caleb, where would you like to be?

LIAM: The building on your left side, DM, not at the tippy top of it, but on that second step down, I would be floating five feet above the surface of that level.

MATT: You've got it.

ASHLEY: You're already doing Caleb's accent. You're really committing to the thing. (laughter)

LIAM: I could be dead in 20 minutes.

TRAVIS: No!

LAURA: (laughs)

LIAM: This is the final bit.

MATT: I'll place you there, okay.

LIAM: Smoke 'em while you got 'em.

TALIESIN: Oh dear.

MATT: Essek is going to be drifting--

TRAVIS: "Oh dear."

MATT: Over on this side.

TRAVIS: Okay, all right, all right, all right. (babbling)

MATT: As you all descend into place--

LAURA: (gasping)

MATT: -- you watch as the ground begins to split open.

SAM: Split open?

MATT: And there, emerging from within, you see the form of Lucien, protruding forward, eyes wide and glowing, but the torso itself melting into a twisted mass of skin, and muscle, and vein as it expands into chunks of stone, and tower, and statue, as it expands into chunks of stone, and tower, and statue, and cathedral-like windows. He is an amassed combination of himself and the city of Cognouza. It widens out as large tusk-like teeth or horns emerge from parts of the body, and where the stalks of the Somnovem once resided, now you see these large, curved, claw-like flesh wings that protrude from the back.

SAM: Cool.

ALL: (exclaiming)

TRAVIS: Holy shit!

ASHLEY: Whoa.

TRAVIS: Oh my god.

TALIESIN: Wow.

TRAVIS: Look at the shit coming out of the back.

LAURA: I want to see it so much closer up.

SAM: Ooh!

MARISHA: Whoa!

TRAVIS: Zoom in! Zoom the fuck in! (laughter)

LAURA and MARISHA: Enhance!

TRAVIS: Oh my god.

MARISHA: Oh my god.

MATT: I also need you all to roll initiative.

ALL: No! (screaming, groaning)

TRAVIS: Dude, look at that.

LAURA: He's so cool!

LIAM: Who needs legs?

LAURA: Wait, can we not see his eyes anymore, then? Does he not have the eyes? Not that we see?

MATT: The eyes are not on the back, no, you don't see them.

MARISHA: He's rocking some Illidan realness.

LAURA: Oh my god, he looks like that--

SAM: That is straight-up Criss Angel.

LAURA: Rock star, yeah.

MATT: (laughs) Mindfreak. The Tomb Takers. All right.

TRAVIS: That's fitting.

SAM: Last initiative ever, guys.

MARISHA: Ah!

LAURA: No!

MATT: 25 to 20.

SAM: Ever.

MARISHA: 23. 22, 22.

MATT: Okay.

ASHLEY: 21 for me.

LAURA: Nice.

TRAVIS: Hey!

SAM: Classic Ashley roll.

MATT: What's your dex?

ASHLEY: You know. 16.

MATT: Got you, all right.

TRAVIS: Did Essek roll something similar?

LAURA: Or did--?

TRAVIS: Or we don't know.

SAM: Or he did.

MARISHA: Wait, what did you just roll?

ASHLEY: 21.

MARISHA: 21? Oh boy.

LAURA: Okay.

ASHLEY: Ooh, so, someone's--

MATT: Essek is actually going at the same time as Beau.

LAURA: Oh, wow.

MARISHA: Ooh. Get it, hot boi.

ASHLEY: Hot boi.

MATT: Okay, 20 to 15?

SAM: Oh, yes, 17.

MATT: All right.

TRAVIS: Wow, this is not great.

LAURA: ♪ Ah ♪

MATT: Now, nobody else is in 20?

TRAVIS: Nobody else is above 15.

SAM: That's okay.

MATT: 15 to 10.

LAURA: 12.

LIAM and TALIESIN: 13.

MATT: What was it? What'd you say, Caleb?

LIAM: 13.

TALIESIN: 13.

MATT: All right.

TRAVIS: So Jester, Caduceus, Caleb, right?

LAURA: No.

MATT: No, Caleb, Caduceus, because Caduceus has a lower dex of the two of you, right?

MARISHA: Jester, Caleb, Caduceus.

LAURA: Caleb, Caduceus, Jester.

MARISHA: Caleb, Caduceus, Jester. Oh, lord.

MATT: Fjord, what'd you get?

TRAVIS: Nine.

LAURA: Yeah!

MATT: There it is.

LIAM: Also, DM, as everyone was situating, you were allowing people to do one last thing to prepare for the battle, is that correct?

MATT: Yes.

LIAM: Caleb is going to cast Mirror Image.

MATT: All right, good to know. [dramatic orchestral music]

TRAVIS: This fucking music.

LAURA: There's eyes, there's eyes on the giant--

SAM: On the pillar, on the dick!

LAURA: On the pillar dick.

ASHLEY: Oh, we're already--

MATT: There's eyes all over this place.

TRAVIS: Everywhere.

SAM: The walls have eyes.

LIAM: Oh, look at the sludge on the building. You can see one there.

LAURA: Oh my god.

LIAM: Ooh.

LAURA: There's eyes everywhere.

TRAVIS: Did you fucking build veiny--

MATT: Yes, I did.

SAM: Did you buy a pack of googly eyes and just stick them all over?

MATT: Yeah, tiny ones.

TRAVIS: No big.

LIAM: "What are you doing in there, Matt?" "Nothing!"

MATT: Yeah, it was a lot of that.

MARISHA: Uh-huh.

MATT: By the way, Marisha, Beau, you're up first.

MARISHA: (screams)

MATT: Followed by Essek.

MARISHA: I don't know what to do!

LAURA: Hit him!

MATT: Lucien is just emerging from this now, and like, (exhales).

TRAVIS: I didn't have a reaction.

MARISHA: Okay, I'm just going to go: Okay! And then run forward, full forward. (zooming)

TRAVIS: Naruto?

MARISHA: Naruto drifting.

LAURA: Na-ruto?

LIAM: Ru-ta-ta.

SAM: Nerudo.

MARISHA: Nerudo.

MATT: All righty, rushing straight up to the newly-emerged Lucien, Cognouza Incarnate.

MARISHA: As I'm rushing, I'm pulling my staff out, and I'm using the momentum, as I rush forward, and you see me do a full barrel roll. Do a barrel roll.

TRAVIS: Unnecessary barrel roll?

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: (laughs)

MARISHA: And as I flip myself over, I'm going to come down with a big slap from the staff. Pop pop.

TRAVIS: Did you say, "Cognouza Incarnate?"

MATT: Yes.

MARISHA: Lord, that's okay, that is deeply okay. 21 and 22.

MATT: Both hit.

SAM: Hey, easy hit.

MARISHA: Okay, okay, 21 and 22.

LAURA: Actually, we could just punch the ground.

MARISHA: Oh, and I have an extra 2d8.

LAURA: We could be hitting him then, too.

MARISHA: 1d8, okay, plus seven. So first attack, because-- okay. 14, plus another, 21 on the first one.

MATT: 21?

MARISHA: 21.

SAM: I have a bomb.

MARISHA: With seven of that being radiant. Second attack. Ooh, yucky. Oh, no, wait, that's a seven. That's great, that's great. So-- sorry. Oh my god, my brain.

TRAVIS: No, chill, chill, chill, I feel like I have to pee already, and that can't be possible.

MARISHA: I know.

ASHLEY: I know, I just went. I feel it.

MARISHA: Seven plus seven is 14, plus eight is 22, plus one is 23.

MATT: Got it, so 21, 23 damage.

MARISHA: Uh-huh.

MATT: All right, that's your action.

MARISHA: I still don't think I can stun him. I'm going to go ahead and do a Flurry of Blows, though.

MATT: Go for it.

LIAM: Pop-pop-pop-pop.

MARISHA: Pop-pop, pop-pop again. Ooh, okay. That first one is 27 to hit?

MATT: That hits.

MARISHA: I'm just going to do damage on that one first.

LIAM: (exhales)

MARISHA: One, okay, lord have mercy.

TRAVIS: Lord have Mercer.

MARISHA: Lord have Mercer. Okay, that's nine, 10, 17 damage.

MATT: Nice.

MARISHA: Second one, okay, and the second one, I rolled a 17 to hit.

MATT: That misses.

MARISHA: Okay. Can I do an Extract Aspects, though?

MATT: You can.

MARISHA: And just in case anything has changed with him.

MATT: Still resistant to fire and necrotic, still immune to psychic, being charmed, frightened, and stunned, so nothing has changed.

MARISHA: Nothing has changed, okay.

MATT: So you can be conscious of that.

MARISHA: So I turn to the group, and I go: He still has the same weaknesses. And that's it.

LIAM: And you cracked one of those flash-bangs, right?

MARISHA: And I did.

MATT: As she arrived down, so, should there be the zone, which has not kicked in yet, it seems, it is not present.

LIAM: In the zone.

TRAVIS: Because he can use any eye on the map.

MATT: Well. All right, finishing Beau's turn, that brings us to Essek's go.

LIAM: Any eye on the map.

MATT: Essek.

TRAVIS: Oh man. (laughs)

MATT: Hmm.

LIAM: (exhales)

TRAVIS: This is like the beginning of a football game. You just want to get hit first, and then you're ready to go.

ASHLEY: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

TRAVIS: Just hit me, let's go.

SAM: We all know that feeling.

TALIESIN: I'm hesitant still.

SAM: Very relatable.

MARISHA: So 17 misses.

TRAVIS: It's just like a capella group, right?

SAM: Thank you, thank you. Just want to hit that first note, then you're fine.

MATT: Essek, from above, is going to go ahead and shift over this way just enough to get everyone else out of the process. He's going to go ahead and use a 4th-level spell to cast Lightning Bolt at 4th-level, (lightning crashing) right through the now just gingerly-hit Lucien. As Beauregard goes in and unleashes this barrage, he seems still in this euphoric state of emergence, and almost takes no notice of the blows.

TRAVIS: Uh oh.

MATT: And then the flash of lightning. (lightning crashing) Still keeps smiling, and is just starting to notice your presence, like a babe opening its eyes for the first time.

LIAM: But it didn't bounce off or anything, right?

MATT: No.

LIAM: It absorbed in his body?

MATT: It seemed to take damage, as expected.

MARISHA: But not as much damage?

MATT: No, he just didn't seem--

LIAM: He didn't care.

MARISHA: Bothered. He didn't care.

TRAVIS: What is Essek hovering above?

LAURA: It's like a gnat.

TRAVIS: That stuff on--

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: On the ground?

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MATT: That's just a textured, rising--

LAURA: He's got the hit points of a city behind him.

TRAVIS: Looked like shields or something.

MARISHA: Why would you be concerned about a few measly hit points? Yeah, that's exactly what it feels like.

MATT: Does not succeed on a saving throw, and is going to let it fly.

TRAVIS: Going to let it fly?

LAURA: Ah.

TALIESIN: That's--

TRAVIS: Going to let what fly?

LAURA: He's got so many hit points, it doesn't matter!

TALIESIN: We're missing something.

MATT: Takes 27 points of lightning damage.

LAURA: I bet we are, we are.

TRAVIS: 27 points.

MATT: It wasn't a great damage roll for him, but as it strikes through, hits the part of the body, and you can see, usually, lightning bolts course through, this hits and just (sucks) seeps into the body, and there's a little bit of a black mark left behind from the somewhat purple, striking bolt of energy as it sizzles a bit, and you can see some of the flesh burning and bubbling at the impact zone. Lucien still just, that euphoric inhale. Essek goes, "Oh, that's not good!" and is going to go ahead and use the rest of his movement to Superman off to the side, and keep out of the way. It's now Lucien's turn.

TRAVIS: Already? (shouts)

MATT: Yeah.

LAURA: Oh, so he went before Yasha. Okay, okay, okay.

MATT: With a deep exhale, (exhales) "This (inhales) is what it was meant to be." And his face just goes dire and sinister.

SAM: (groans)

MATT: He is going to... He's going to go ahead and Will Aether.

SAM: I'm sorry?

TRAVIS: Will.

MATT: Will Aether.

LAURA: What is that?

SAM: Is that a man?

MATT: So first, he can do that twice. One is Summon Cataclysm, first.

TRAVIS: Summon Cataclysm?!

MATT: You see he closes his eyes and puts his hand up, and in the middle of the air, from nothing, suddenly, you see a statue, some sort of gargoyle-like structure, just apparate out of nothing, like it was willed to manifest. And he goes, "Ha," (whooshing) and sends it towards you, Caduceus. As it appears--

LAURA: I thought he pointed at me, and I was like.

LAURA and MARISHA: (laughs)

MARISHA: (groans)

TRAVIS: Dodge.

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: Does a 28 hit?

LAURA: Oh.

TALIESIN: Yeah, that hits.

MATT: All right, I need you to go ahead and make a--

TRAVIS: 28?

LAURA: We're going to die.

MATT: -- a strength saving throw.

TALIESIN: Oh, that's funny.

MARISHA: Wait, he's throwing a statue at him?

TRAVIS: 28? My AC is 17.

LAURA: Does the statue flew at Caduceus?

TALIESIN: A strength save?

MATT: It appeared, and then just (whooshing). He appeared to rake his hand through the air, and will it to strike towards--

TALIESIN: I will say, this was a very good roll for me, 16.

MATT: No, that doesn't, unfortunately.

TALIESIN: Yeah, I had a funny feeling.

LIAM: This is where dreams are possible, you guys.

TRAVIS: Oh, man.

LIAM: (whooshing)

MATT: You take 22 points of bludgeoning damage, and you are (grunts) taken off of your platform, and pinned against the ground over there.

SAM: Pinned, can't move.

TALIESIN: Uh.

MATT: So you are restrained until you manage to break free, because you are now partially covered by the statue.

TALIESIN: And it's a statue, it's not like a moving statue.

MATT: It's just a statue.

TALIESIN: And then it's a wisdom save for a spell, for concentration?

MATT: No, it's a constitution saving throw, but you have advantage, and the DC is half the damage you took.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Holy shit.

TALIESIN: Nope. That was a terrible roll. That was two terrible rolls.

MATT: (sighs) And with that.

TALIESIN: Fuck.

MATT: The Holy Fists of Beauregard fade.

LAURA: No!

TALIESIN: I got to tap you to redo it, so I need to get in close if I need to--

MARISHA: Right.

TALIESIN: If I'm going to bring that back.

TRAVIS: This is good, this is good.

TALIESIN: How would you describe my current state?

MATT: You are currently knocked out of the air as the statue impacts and then slams you into the building across that way, and you are pinned now.

TALIESIN: I'm pinned.

MATT: The statue is crushing you against the rooftop of a slightly emerging structure.

TALIESIN: I was curious if there was a technical, if it was grappled, or--

MATT: Restrained--

TALIESIN: Restrained, thank you.

MATT: -- is what it is. All right, the second bit is going to be Nightmare Cage.

TRAVIS: (laughs) After he finishes chucking the statue.

LIAM: That's for you.

MATT: He smiles, and glances around the battlefield, and looks over towards Yasha.

LAURA: No.

MATT: And raises the other hand. From the ground beneath you, a small, fleshy tether, shoots up like a tendril--

LAURA: A fleshy tether.

MATT: -- that goes to strike towards you. And I need you to make a dexterity saving throw. You do have advantage because you can see.

ASHLEY: Okay. Hmm!

TALIESIN: Oh!

MATT: Minus your number of eyes, if you have any.

LIAM: And Yasha's by the stairs, right?

LAURA: Oh, right, she has no eyes? Yasha and Jester have no eyes.

ASHLEY: Fucking shit. Okay. That was advantage.

MATT: Yes.

ASHLEY: 10. (gasps) (laughter)

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: Oh dear.

MATT: The tether hits you. It just grabs your ankle. It doesn't squeeze, it doesn't strike you with pain, but then, suddenly, your mind is filled with a terrifying nightmare. Your vision of this battlefield, your consciousness and awareness of the space is gone. In this moment, you are running through the fields of Xhorhas, broken, laden with shattered stone and shale. You can see curved spires of rock. It is raining around you, and you are running for fear, and you stop, and you turn, and look to your right, and there you see the corpse of Zuala staring at you. "Why did you leave me?"

TRAVIS: Oh.

LAURA: Oh no!

MATT: That's going to end Lucien's turn.

TRAVIS: Oh boy.

MATT: Yasha, it's your turn. What are you doing in the nightmare?

ASHLEY: In the nightmare? Okay. We can-- If we can dream it, we can-- Okay. Okay, can I try, in that, to-- Oh god. Wait. Can I rage right now, or no?

MATT: If you'd like to. I will say that your action economy is less important. You cannot move on the battlefield. You all see Yasha just go slack with a horrible, ghastly expression on her face, but in your mind right now, you are running and frightened, not the condition, but you are filled with adrenaline. You are welcome to rage, if you'd like to. And then what do you want to do in this nightmare?

ASHLEY: Okay, I'm going to rage, and I'm going to look at Zuala, and say: You're not real, you're not real.

MATT: Okay, go ahead and make a wisdom saving throw.

MARISHA: With advantage.

MATT: With advantage because you do have the--

LAURA: Hooray.

ASHLEY: Okay.

LAURA: (laughs)

ASHLEY: Gah.

SAM: It's good. It's good.

ASHLEY: I'm just looking at this in the middle, and it's not changing.

TRAVIS: (laughs) If I pick it up, it might change.

ASHLEY: Maybe I saw something else. 11.

LAURA: (groans)

MATT: You try and will it out there, but, for some reason, as much as you're trying to shake it off, this is too real. This is too real, and there she is, looking at you, and her eyes just look pained and angry, and you can see the blood pouring from the mouth, and the ears, and the eyes are just locked onto you. "Why?" And that's your turn. Finishing Yasha's go, first lair action happens.

LAURA: Oh my god.

TRAVIS: The first lair action.

ASHLEY: Oh my god.

SAM: It's okay.

MATT: The Pattern Revealed.

LAURA: (gasps)

MATT: In the chamber, a similar shimmy in space as to what you saw when you fought Cree, begins to (whooshes) flicker around the room. You see flashes of a fractal in symbols, in strange, twisting, spiraling-type visions. I need everybody except for Yasha, who is not mentally present, to make a wisdom saving throw.

TRAVIS: "Not mentally present."

TALIESIN: With advantage.

MARISHA: Mm-hmm.

MATT: You would, yes.

SAM: Nice.

MATT: That Heroes' Feast saved your ass.

MARISHA: Natural 20.

ASHLEY: Yes.

LAURA: What?

SAM: Oh, wait, but minus eyes, right?

LAURA: Minus your eyes.

MATT: Minus eyes, yes.

TRAVIS: Oh, so 20 even.

MATT: 20 even.

TALIESIN: How many eyes am I at?

LAURA: 27.

MATT: 27, nice.

LIAM: Minus eyes, 25.

MATT: Jeez!

LIAM: Yeah, I rolled a 18, and then a 17.

MATT: Well done.

SAM: I had 21, but it's down to 19.

MATT: Down to 19? That's still enough.

SAM: Okay.

TALIESIN: 27.

MATT: Jesus, all righty.

TALIESIN: I rolled really well.

MATT: And a natural 20?

MARISHA: A natural 20 for 26 minus eyes.

MATT: All right, the pattern doesn't seem to take hold.

MARISHA: Ha-ha-ha. Heroes' Feast.

MATT: And nobody--

TRAVIS: Well, we needed one thing to go right this turn. (laughter) Holy shit.

SAM: We all made the save?

LAURA: Yeah.

SAM: Whoa.

LIAM: That will be a toast for us for years to come. Minus eyes.

ALL: (repeated) Minus eyes.

TRAVIS: Oh no, it's going to stick.

MATT: Essek.

LAURA: Come on, Essek.

MATT: Yeah! Natural 19, damn. A solid round for that. The pattern, you all managed to avert your gaze, and recognizing what this may be, and do not allow the continued corruption of the Somnovem to leak into you.

LIAM: Ew.

MATT: However, there is a strange crackling in the air, like the very essence of the aether of the Astral Sea is ripe for the molding, until the next turn. So with that, it is now Veth's go.

LAURA: The very what of the Astral Sea? The very what of the Astral Sea is ripe?

MARISHA: Is ripe for the molding?

MATT: Yeah, the air itself seems to buzz with potential.

TRAVIS: It's primed.

MARISHA: Buzz with potential.

MATT: Veth, you're up.

LIAM: Yep.

SAM: From behind the pillar, without exposing myself yet, I will shout: Mollymauk Tealeaf, please, you're the one who brought us together. Don't make us end you like this. We don't want to do this.

MATT: Okay, so you're using your bonus action to attempt to--

SAM: Uh-huh.

MATT: Roll a persuasion check.

SAM: Okay, I'm good at persuasion. Three.

MATT: Lucien is still conducting with this newfound connection with the entire city, not just the Somnovem, and didn't listen to a single word you said.

SAM: Cool, cool.

TRAVIS: Cool, cool.

SAM: Well, hearing no response, I will pop out and shoot a crossbow bolt at him.

MATT: Go for it. (laughs)

SAM: I don't have advantage, but he's with Beau. MATT: Beauregard is in melee, so.

SAM: That is a super shitty roll. 14 to hit.

MATT: That misses.

SAM: But, because I'm using my ASC, my Aeorian Security Cannon, I'm going to command the bolt to come back, and shoot it, and direct it back, and try again.

MATT: You got it.

SAM: Better, 20.

MATT: 20? Just hits.

SAM: I don't have to reduce by eyes, right?

MATT: No, not for attacks.

SAM: Okay, cool, cool, cool.

MATT: That just hits, yeah.

SAM: Okay, good.

LIAM: Cool, cool, cool.

MATT: So the bolt, (whooshing) and just seems to come right back, and pierce Lucien in the side, so go ahead and roll damage.

SAM: All right. Not great, but let's see. 10, 20. 29.

TRAVIS: Holy shit.

SAM: Plus seven is 36 points, 36 points of damage.

MATT: Great, well done.

SAM: And that's it. I'll just nook behind, back again.

MATT: You've got it. All righty. Finishing Veth's turn. Now, it's the eyes' go.

LAURA: Oh my god.

MATT: So you watch as various portions of the landscape begin to roil, and bubble, and lift. Let's say. As one of the eyes of the Somnovem emerges from the ground, tethered to the floor, and, with that, you can see.

TRAVIS: Oh fuck! (laughs)

MARISHA: Oh!

TRAVIS: He's got century guns, you guys.

MARISHA: So wait, he just summoned that from the flesh.

MATT: It seemed to emerge from the ground nearby.

LAURA: Came up from the ground.

SAM: That is gross.

MARISHA: Huh. Huh, huh, huh.

TALIESIN: He just did that in between the turns.

LAURA: And he aims straight at me?

MATT: Well, this is its own--

LIAM: Yeah, whack-a-mole with the eyes.

SAM: Was I in that cone?

MATT: No, you were just outside of the cone.

SAM: (laughs) So it's just Jes.

LAURA: Just little old me.

MATT: And also.

TALIESIN: Unless you get out of it.

TRAVIS: You have a duplicate up.

LAURA: I do, but it's not.

MATT: Up here, at the top, another eye appears.

LAURA: (gasps)

TRAVIS: Fuck, you guys.

LAURA: They can appear anywhere.

MATT: Another eye appears.

MARISHA: (laughs)

TRAVIS: He's the whole map. I mean, yeah, they can appear anywhere.

LIAM: Fjord, look in your coat pocket. (laughter)

TRAVIS: (shouts) (laughter)

SAM: This is the worst magic show ever.

LIAM: Is this your card?

TRAVIS: I bought this wholesale. (laughter)

LAURA: Do we each get a eye pointed at us?

MATT: The Eye of Gaudius--

TRAVIS: Oh shit.

MATT: Up here, up top, glances over the edge in the direction, I'm going to say, of Beauregard. Beauregard, I need you to go ahead--

ASHLEY: Don't you fucking dare.

MATT: Make a wisdom saving throw.

MARISHA: Motherfuck.

TALIESIN: Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.

MARISHA: Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.

LIAM: Mother bitch.

MARISHA: All right. Okay, okay. Minus eyes, 23.

SAM: ♪ Minus eyes ♪

MATT: 23, that does succeed. So as you feel the imploring draw of the eye of Gaudius to bring its love to you and yours to it, you shrug it off, but not before an additional eye is added to your body.

TRAVIS: Oh fuck.

SAM: How many is that?

TRAVIS: That's three, right?

SAM: Is that five?

TRAVIS and LAURA: Four!

LIAM: So we're tied now.

LAURA: Oh my god.

TRAVIS: Dude, this is heavy.

MATT: Luctus over there--

LAURA: What eye came out and looked at me? Do I know which eye that was?

TRAVIS: We don't know yet.

MATT: That one? It's written on there, it's fine. It's Vigilan.

LAURA: Vigilan? Oh, we don't-- Oh, we don't know that one.

MARISHA: That's the other name.

TRAVIS: That was the one we didn't get.

LAURA: So I would know that I don't recognize it as one that we mentioned.

MATT: Yes.

ASHLEY: ♪ Do you know the Vigilan eye ♪

MATT: Luctus is going to go ahead and glance over towards-- Towards you, Veth.

SAM: Ah!

MATT: Since you are hiding from Lucien, but not from the direction of Luctus.

SAM: He can't get me here.

MATT: Well, you didn't use your bonus action to hide after firing, so you're not hidden. I need you to go ahead and make a dexterity saving throw.

SAM: I'm good at those.

TRAVIS: Luctus is the one that's up on the-- yeah.

MATT: Correct.

SAM: Rolled a 10 plus 10.

MATT: Minus eyes?

SAM: 18.

TRAVIS: ♪ Minus eyes ♪

MATT: 18? That's a failure. (groaning)

SAM: Oh, the eyes!

TRAVIS: That's slowed. Or was.

MATT: You are overcome with grief, remembering all the missteps you've made in your life that have led you to this moment. You--

SAM: It's because I farted that time.

MATT: (laughs) You are considered slowed for the time being, much like you were the last time.

TRAVIS: You got a better dex than I do though, so.

LIAM: Cunning actions are gone.

MATT: You can't take reactions. You can either take a bonus action or an action on your turn, but not both. And you move at half speed.

SAM: Oh no.

MATT: Timorei, who's over on that hill right there--

MARISHA: Do they all get to go?

MATT: -- is going to go ahead and turn its eye over towards Essek. Essek has to go ahead and make a wisdom saving throw. Natural 18, yeah, that'll do it. So he succeeds.

MARISHA: Hot boi!

TRAVIS: Where is Timorei?

MATT: So he manages to avoid. Timorei is the one that's right over there on the middle of that thing.

TRAVIS: Got it.

MATT: You see Essek shake it off, all of a sudden, like just immediate flop sweat. And as he shakes his head, you see as an eye appears in his throat.

LAURA: Oh no! I don't understand. Regardless of if you shake it off, you still get the eye?!

MATT: Some of them.

TRAVIS: Only some of the eyes, Yeah, yeah, yeah.

MATT: Not all of them but a few of them.

LAURA: You just get one?

MATT: You get one, regardless. There's a timer on this battle, y'all.

LAURA: Oh my god.

MATT: That's going to finish the Eyes of the Somnovem's turn.

TRAVIS: (laughs) Cool! Cool!

MATT: Caleb, you're up. Caduceus, you're on deck.

LIAM: Caleb is going to mind-fly up to the top of the building at the highest step, and this could do absolutely nothing. He's not on it, I don't want to touch anything, so a good five feet. I'm going to think at that thing: Snap out of it, Tealeaf, we need you. And I am going to focus on the eyes on the different points of my body and imagine a large flesh and stone version of the glaive that Lorenzo used to murder Mollymauk and try to summon it into the air above him and stab down.

MATT: Make a wisdom check. Roll a d20, add your wisdom modifier, add the number of eyes you have.

SAM and MARISHA: Add?

MATT: Yes, for this one you do. And you have advantage because the air is crackling with the aether of potential.

LIAM: Advantage?

TRAVIS: Oh.

LIAM: So tell me all those things again. 24 plus the eyes.

MATT: Yes.

LIAM: And I have four.

MATT: Yes.

LIAM: 28.

MATT: 28?

LIAM: Yes.

MATT: As you will this, in the air in front of Lucien, you see this spark, this light, and it emerges. And there you see this dark metallic hooked glaive appear, blood still fresh, dripping from the front of it. As it spins around towards Lucien, who currently is still surveying the atmosphere, twitches the head a bit and looks up at it. Eyes go wide with a flash of unexpected recognition before it shoots forward. Roll an attack with me using your spell attack modifier.

LIAM: That is a 23 to hit.

MATT: That hits, go ahead and roll 3d12 plus your spell modifier.

MARISHA: 3d12. Okay, okay.

TRAVIS: You just became a fighter.

LAURA: That's cool.

TRAVIS: With your spell modifier.

LAURA: Without having to use a spell.

LIAM: 30.

MATT: 30 points of damage to Lucien as the glaive sinks into the body, before it vanishes, no longer held in the will.

LIAM: I'm going to add just a little bit of flavor to it. Right before it went, on the side of the glaive an eye went-- bulged open and (whoosh).

MATT: You've got it.

LIAM: Done.

MATT: All righty. With that--

TRAVIS: Fascinating.

LAURA: Fascinating.

MATT: Now, that was your action?

LIAM: Yes.

MATT: Do you have anything you want to do with your bonus action?

LIAM: Well, I would say--

MATT: Or you making your bonus action as part of--

LIAM: The bonus action were the words to--

MATT: Then go ahead and make a persuasion check as well with that.

TRAVIS: Good turn, dude.

SAM: So you can imagine anything?

LIAM: This is persuasion?

MATT: Correct.

TRAVIS: Now is not the time for minotaur sex, okay?

LIAM: 17, do I minus the eyes?

MATT: For the persuasion check, no.

LIAM: 17.

MATT: 17. The glaive struck, but the words didn't seem to string through. Lucien in this form, connected to the city of Cognouza seems a little harder to get through to than the previous incarnation you battled. It doesn't mean-- you don't sense-- Maybe some hope to it, but the words fall on deaf ears. That finish your turn, Caleb?

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: All right. With the end of Caleb's turn, that brings it to Caduceus. Jester, you're on deck.

TALIESIN: All right, I am currently restrained by a giant statue.

MATT: Yep. (grunts) It is crushing your legs a bit. Not to the point where it's damaging you, but you cannot move at the moment.

TALIESIN: Okay, and what would it be to try and get out of this?

MATT: It would be an action and a strength saving throw to try and push it off of you. Or you can still cast from there. Restrained just means you can't move and any attack rolls you make are with disadvantage, attacks against you have advantage.

TALIESIN: Who's within 30 feet of me? Nobody.

MATT: Actually, that's a good point. Before we even get to what you're doing, at the end of Caleb's turn, going to go ahead and use a legendary action. to use Gaze of the Somnovem. And... Gaudius is going to go ahead and shift over towards Essek. Knowing this has happened and functioned once before. Essek is going to make another wisdom saving throw with advantage, and succeeds.

TRAVIS: Yeah. Nice job, Essek.

MATT: But gets another eye.

TRAVIS: Oh my fucking god. How many is that for Essek now, do we know?

MATT: Four.

TRAVIS: Anybody have more than four? Three of us have four, right?

MATT: All right, Caduceus.

TALIESIN: That threw me. Is there anyone or anything within 30 feet of me? Or 60 for that matter, I'm just trying to get an idea.

MATT: Jester is within 60, Veth is within 60 and the eye of Timorei is within 60. Just know that Jester is currently in a space of anti-magic right now.

TALIESIN: That anti-magic field is within my-- Okay, and yeah, this stuff has the same-- I'm just sort of-- oh, I can't do that, sorry. Sorry, I had a plan and it got kerfuffled pretty hard. I am going to-- I can't do that either. Motherfucker. Sorry.

TRAVIS: I feel like it's been a year since we started the fight.

MATT: (laughs)

TRAVIS: My face is 105 degrees. (laughter)

LIAM: In the Astral Sea, it could have been.

MATT: Yeah. Caduceus.

TALIESIN: Yeah, sorry. I am going to use my-- I can't use my bonus action. Okay, I'm going to cast Freedom of Movement on myself. That should get me unlocked from this thing.

MATT: That would, actually.

TALIESIN: Okay, I'm casting Freedom of Movement.

MATT: You're no longer restrained and your movement will not be restrained for as long as that continues to go.

MARISHA: Is that--? Oh yeah, okay, okay, okay.

MATT: It's not concentration.

TALIESIN: It's not a concentration, but unless I have a bonus action, that's kind of what I got right now on that level. So with the rest of my turn, I'm--

MATT: You still have your movement, if you'd like to move.

TALIESIN: Yeah, I'm going to take my movement to try and scoot behind that temple over there.

MATT: Over here?

TALIESIN: No, the other way, towards-- Oh, actually, that's right, there's a cone there. Actually, I'll head the other direction around. I'm so sorry, this map is wonderfully and beautifully confusing.

MATT: That's fine.

TALIESIN: Over here.

MATT: Over here?

TALIESIN: Yeah, this way.

MATT: Oh, this way?

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: Just get a little cover, try and get some cover from those eyes.

MATT: You got it, okay. That finish your turn, Caduceus?

TALIESIN: For now, that was my action, yeah.

MATT: All right, another legendary action. Lucien is going to Fold Space.

TRAVIS: No, no, he doesn't want to do that.

MATT: "Ah. Let me get a look at all your faces." And you hear this strange sucking pop sound as he vanishes from next to Beauregard and appears instead--

SAM: Ah!

LAURA: No!

MATT: -- next to you, Veth.

LAURA: No!

MATT: As you're hiding, you just look up over your shoulder and just see him looking down at you with a grin. "Hi."

SAM: Hi?

MATT: Jester, your turn. Fjord, you're on deck.

SAM: Kind of like a minotaur.

LAURA: Okay, yeah.

SAM: Got horns.

LAURA: (blows raspberry) Okay. I am going to get out of this anti-magicness area that I'm in. Can I fly up? Can I still do that in this area?

MATT: It is not a magical effect. It is just a thought.

LAURA: Okay, so I'm going to fly up and over to-- Hold on, let me see where. Around here, can you see where my little thing is?

MATT: Correct, what's your movement speed?

LAURA: Oh, right, I don't think I can go that far. Like 35.

MATT: 35, you can get just above Lucien, if you want to.

LAURA: And I'll be out of the cone?

MATT: You will be out of the cone, yes.

LAURA: Okay. Then I'll do that.

MATT: Okay, so you glide up and you get to about there.

LAURA: And I'm going to cast-- who knows--!

TRAVIS: (laughs) I haven't heard of that spell.

LAURA: -- if this is going to work. I'm going to cast Banishment. Not on Lucien, on the eyeball.

MATT: Okay.

ASHLEY: Hell yeah.

TRAVIS: They got to have hit points, and they seem to.

MARISHA: Yeah, exactly.

MATT: That's a four.

LAURA: Sweet!

TRAVIS: Yes!

ASHLEY: Yes!

TALIESIN: Nice.

MATT: Vigilan vanishes from the field. Not submerges back into the living floor of this aortic chamber, but just (pop) is gone. For as long as you're concentrating on it.

MARISHA: Well, that helps that anti-magic shit.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: All right. So that's your movement and your action. Is that your turn?

LAURA: Yeah, for my bonus action I'm going to send Jester forward.

MARISHA: Drum and bass.

LAURA: Closer to the giant.

MATT: 30 feet there?

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: You got it. All righty, chilling out with the Mage Hand.

SAM: Hi.

MATT: At the end of your turn--

LAURA: Hi.

MATT: -- he's going to use another legendary action.

TRAVIS: How many is that, four?

MATT: That is three.

LAURA: That's his third.

MATT: To Shift Somnovem. With that, Timorei seems to sink into the ground and then re-emerge about 30 feet over here. All right, that brings us to Fjord's go with Beau on deck.

TRAVIS: Does anything happen before my turn?

MATT: Nope, that was it. The eye just--

TRAVIS: Well, because this is the big one, I'm going to crack out the MOAB, the mother of all bombs. The one that's going to save us all. Veth, keep your clothes on. And with my bonus action, I will cast Marine Layer. (laughter)

SAM: (yelling)

MATT: Okay, and you are over here.

SAM: Greatest spell in history.

MATT: There you go.

SAM: Does Lucien just start going "What? No, no!" (groaning)

TRAVIS: Most worthless-- I'll fuck it up soon enough. Can I get a ruler for 90 feet? Because I can't quite count.

MATT: Yes, you may.

LIAM: Oh my goodness.

TALIESIN: Yeah, it's really hard to figure out scale on this thing.

LAURA: Yeah, it really is.

TALIESIN: The problem with this map, it's very hard to figure out how close or far anything is.

MATT: -- my measuring tool.

SAM: Did someone steal your tool?

TRAVIS: Floppy ruler.

MATT: It's not here, that's unfortunate. Well.

TRAVIS: Could you count 90 feet?

MATT: I could get a-- You say 90 feet?

TRAVIS: Yeah. I believe this is a--

TRAVIS: 60?

MATT: This is a 100-foot line. So I'm going to go ahead and put 90 feet

TRAVIS: From me.

MATT: From you would be right there.

TRAVIS: Yeah, I'm not nearly in range. Great, I will fire off three Eldritch Blasts in his direction. 120 feet.

MATT: You got it, because you can see him, and he can't see you, so go for it.

TRAVIS: Okay, great, cool. Feeling good, feeling strong. That is a 19 to hit.

MATT: Misses.

TRAVIS: Okay.

TRAVIS: That is a 21 to hit?

MATT: That hits.

TRAVIS: Okay, and a 20 to hit.

MATT: Hits.

TRAVIS: Okay, great. 1d10. Oh, I missed Hexblade's Curse, cool. 10 plus five, that's 15 points of force damage and 12 points of force damage for 20-- What did I say? What's that total?

MATT: That was 15 and 12, so that's 27.

TRAVIS: 27 points of force damage.

MATT: You've got it.

TRAVIS: With my movement, I will move away from Essek five feet.

MATT: This way?

TRAVIS: I'm sorry, towards you-ish, along that wall and put myself behind total cover from where he is.

MATT: Got it, so over here, you mean?

TRAVIS: Yeah, and I'll come off the ground just five or 10 feet. Let's call it 10 feet.

MATT: You got it.

TALIESIN: You're kind of a human shield right now.

MATT: A little bit.

TALIESIN: Huh.

ALL: Huh.

TRAVIS: Staying just off the ground, but behind the cover, great. So I can't see him, he can't see me. Thank you, that's it.

MATT: You got it. All right, finishing Fjord's turn, going to use another legendary action.

MARISHA: Oh my god, is that four?!

TRAVIS and TALIESIN: That's four.

MATT: Luctus, who can peer through here tries to follow where those blasts came from, but cannot see through the fog. So cannot target Fjord.

LAURA: Yeah!

SAM: (whispering) Marine Layer.

MATT: Instead is going to target Essek, since Essek is right there. Dexterity save. No, that's a fail. Essek is now slowed as well. The grief of his actions.

TALIESIN: That's a pile.

MATT: Visions of turning over an important relic of his people to the enemy. He is wracked with the chains of guilt and seems to begin to sink from the air as he just begins to curl forward with a look of absolute despair on his face. All right, that's going to finish that go.

MATT: Beau, you're up!

MARISHA: Okay. Do I still feel that crackling energy of potential?

MATT: Yeah, hasn't left yet.

MARISHA: All right, I am going to imagine-- Where's my pointer? That that dome-y structure behind him with the weight of heavy steel and iron, but it takes the appearance of The Fletching and Moondrop Circus tent. And I'm going to imagine it and will it towards Lucien and just yank and have the whole thing crash into him.

MATT: Okay, go ahead and make a wisdom check. Add your wisdom modifier, with advantage, and the number of eyes you have.

MARISHA: Wisdom check, with advantage, plus eyes.

MATT: Correct.

MARISHA: Just straight wisdom.

MATT: Correct.

MARISHA: Okay. 18.

MATT: 18 is not enough. It begins to form and the shape of the circus begins to build around it and the distance, the tether of the large flesh tower that's in front of you blocking the view and the distraction of Lucien right there, you have a hard time continuing the concentration to hold it together and it reverts back to its original form.

MARISHA: Okay.

MATT: Unfortunately. That's your action.

TRAVIS: So you did an 18 on that and you did a 28?

LAURA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Yours was-- okay, we don't know what it is. 20 to 25, probably

MARISHA: I'll use my--

MATT: It seemed like the sheer volume of what you were attempting was fairly difficult, so.

TRAVIS: Maybe it's a sliding scale.

MARISHA: Okay. I will use my-- can I do anything with my bonus action involving imagination? Probably not.

ASHLEY: Wait, did you add your eyes?

MARISHA: I did, yeah.

ASHLEY: I thought I was onto something. (laughter)

TRAVIS: I like it, keep them coming.

SAM: Almost cracked it.

TRAVIS: Let's go.

MARISHA: I'll use my bonus action Patient Defense.

MATT: Okay, you've got it.

SAM: But it's an imagination Patient Defense.

MATT: All right. Finishing that, it is Essek's turn. Essek, who's now currently like-- "I cannot focus on my deeds." And looking-- Actually, yeah, let's see if that works. Looking around in the environment is going to slowly drift this direction at half speed, only to get about there. And look down at the two exposed eyes of the Somnovem and be like, "Let's see if we can bind your vitality together." As he puts his hands together, he creates this tiny sparkling orb of black-gray energy. He splits it in two and his actions are slow and sluggish, but he still gives a heave and you watch as they both float off towards the two different eyes over there, Timorei and Luctus. With that-- Natural one on Timorei.

LAURA and SAM: Oh, good.

MATT: And yeah, that's a 15. They both fail and you watch as both these motes hit the two eyes. A little tether of grayish energy connects the two and they are both in some way bound. And Essek (sighs). "Hurt one, hurt both!" And he just stays there, clutching himself.

SAM: Oh, cool, cool, cool.

MATT: As he casts Tether Essence.

LAURA: Tight, tight, tight.

TRAVIS: Tether Essence.

LAURA: And that's which two eyes?

MATT: That is Timorei and Luctus.

LAURA: Tight.

TRAVIS: Matt, your cord is on the back of your chair.

MATT: Oh, you're right, it is, thank you.

TALIESIN: How close are they to each other?

MATT: They're about 50, 60 or so feet from each other.

TALIESIN: Okay, okay.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: All righty, finishing Essek's turn. Lucien's going to use his last legendary action.

TRAVIS: His last. That's five.

MATT: That's five.

TRAVIS: That's five?!

MATT: Yep.

TRAVIS: Best movie ever.

TALIESIN: Fuck.

MATT: -- to Shift Somnovem. He's going to try and move Luctus away from this, noticing this strange magic and shift Luctus this way.

LAURA: Did it affect the tether?

MATT: The tether's still visible.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: But that's instinctually what he would have done. All right, finishing Essek's turn, it's now Lucien's turn. Legendary actions come back. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Holy shit!

TALIESIN: This is so rough.

MARISHA: This is intense.

MATT: Looking down at you still, this whole time, with all this is happening, is willing little bits across the battlefield, the connection of everything around him. This network of sensing the entirety of this space, this lair, and now focuses back on you, Veth as the bladed wings just come down on you. Six attacks against you.

LAURA: (gasps) Six attacks?!

TRAVIS: Oh my--

LAURA: Don't be next to him, don't be next to him!

TRAVIS: Did you just get Godfathered?

MATT: 27 to hit?

SAM: Yeah.

LAURA: On just one of them?!

MATT: Yes. 30 to hit.

SAM: Yes.

MATT: 18?

SAM: Miss.

MATT: 21?

SAM: Hit.

MATT: 22?

SAM: Hit.

MATT: And 20.

SAM: Hit.

MATT: So five hit.

SAM: Five out of six ain't bad. These are like 1d6 damage, don't worry.

TRAVIS: Can you use roguish evasion?

SAM: I can't, because I'm slowed.

MATT: Yeah.

SAM: I have no reactions.

TRAVIS: Ooh, he stacked you up.

MATT: 16 points of slashing damage on the first hit.

SAM: Okay.

MATT: 18 points of slashing damage on the second hit.

MARISHA: Oh my god.

MATT: 20 points of slashing damage on the third hit.

LIAM: Stop it.

MATT: 15 points of slashing damage on the fourth hit. And 14 points of slashing damage on the fifth hit.

LIAM: I will cut you. (laughter)

TALIESIN: Are you conscious?

SAM: Sure.

TALIESIN: Okay.

TRAVIS: You did do the most damage in the first half of this fight. You were fucking him up.

LIAM: Yeah.

SAM: I will just say: I forgive you. (laughter)

MATT: As Lucien's wings pull back, covered in the blood of Veth, who is now currently just floating in the air, writhing in pain. Lucien's voice, without speaking, enters all of your minds and says, "Don't fight the inevitable. Join me, just like everyone will, in time."

MATT: That's going to end his turn. Yasha, you're up and still in your nightmare.

ASHLEY: Okay, did I hear that from Lucien?

MATT: You actually did not. You are still mentally elsewhere. The tether in the ground still stuck to you.

ASHLEY: Okay. So-- Okay, I still see Zuala?

MATT: Mm-hmm.

ASHLEY: I am going to take out the Holy Avenger. I know you're not her. I'm going to try to take a swing at her.

MATT: Sure, go for it.

ASHLEY: Okay. You're all, you're all-- Oh, okay. That would be-- really? 29. Okay.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

TALIESIN: Didn't know it could do that. (laughter)

MATT: In your vision, you strike through and carve through the body of Zuala. You watch as the body begins to split and as it does, eyes and teeth begin to emerge from where the wound is exposed as it begins to crumble into the ground. You begin to make sense of the awareness that this possibly could not be real. I need you to make another wisdom check. A wisdom saving throw but with advantage.

ASHLEY: Come on, you bitch. Okay. 17?

MATT: 17, minus any eyes you have.

ASHLEY: I don't have any eyes.

MATT: Have any eyes? that's a success. (cheering)

TRAVIS: Oh man.

MATT: You push through and as you will yourself back, you close your eyes and you open them once more and you are back amongst your friends in the middle of the battlefield. It takes a moment to take it in. And the tether beneath you just withers into dark ash and vanishes.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: You still have your movement and your bonus if you choose to use it.

ASHLEY: Okay, yeah. So bonus, what I would like to do, freaking the fuck out, so I yell out a battle cry.

MATT: How many times can you Battle Cry in a day? Because I believe you may have used it in the last battle.

TRAVIS: You did.

ASHLEY: Did I?

LAURA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Are you raging right now? Now that you're out of the effect.

ASHLEY: Yes.

MATT: She's been raging since last time.

TRAVIS: Okay, it held up even though she wasn't attacked, or attacked?

LAURA: She attacked Zuala.

MATT: Well, she also has--

ASHLEY: I have rage-- Yeah, persistent.

TRAVIS: Oh great, okay, okay.

ASHLEY: It's not checked for some reason.

LAURA: But you did use it.

ASHLEY: I did use it.

MATT: It's okay, no worries. Okay, so I just have a bonus action and movement. Yeah?

TRAVIS: Same day, same fight.

LIAM: Just a couple of minutes ago.

ASHLEY: So so, so. Okay.

TRAVIS: Anyone else need the air conditioning on? I don't know, is it me?

ASHLEY: Yeah, I'm sweating. I'm sweating.

TRAVIS: Swimming in butt sweat.

ASHLEY: I want to get to-- I'm going to move this way.

MATT: All right.

ASHLEY: How far can I go?

MATT: What's your intelligence score again?

ASHLEY: 12.

MATT: So you can move 35 feet.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MARISHA: Bless.

TRAVIS: Thank the gods. (laughter)

MATT: Right about there.

ASHLEY: Can I take my second hit?

MATT: You've already used your action to attack, so. Or you used your action to--

ASHLEY: Because I did one hit.

MATT: You know what? Yes. I would allow it because you did attack within your vision. Let's do it.

ASHLEY: Okay.

LAURA: Another 29, please.

ASHLEY: Come on, okay. Okay. 28.

MARISHA: Hey!

MATT: That hits, go and roll damage.

TRAVIS: Yes!

MARISHA: ♪ Making up for lost time ♪

TALIESIN: (laughs)

ASHLEY: Okay.

TALIESIN: Add salt and pepper to taste. (laughter)

SAM: I want to see a slow-mo video of you rolling those tiny dice. Because they are so adorable.

MARISHA: Just Salt Bae rolling her dice.

ASHLEY: I'm going to do Savage Attacker just to see since I can do it on each turn.

LAURA: You have to use tweezers to pick it up.

MARISHA: Yeah. (laughs)

SAM: Imagine if your hands are sweaty, they just stick.

TALIESIN: Could have one of those little large magnifying sheets so that you roll it in and then they look big and then when you scoop them out, they're tiny.

TRAVIS: That's great.

ASHLEY: 35 points of damage.

MATT: 35 points of damage.

SAM: Who did you attack? An eye or the big boss?

LAURA: Eyeball.

ASHLEY: Eye. An eye.

LAURA: Which means Luctus also got it. He's going to be mad.

MATT: Indeed.

LIAM: I rolled a-- Nope, that's a sea monkey.

SAM: I don't have to roll; Slow just is sticking. I don't roll every turn, right?

MATT: You do, actually.

SAM: Well, it's not my turn yet.

MATT: No, but after this it will be and at the end of your turn, you'll roll to see if you got out of it. So as you strike through, carve down through Timorei, it leaves this large wound in the side. You can see where the blood begins to emerge and it looks pretty hurt. At the same time, Luctus, a great distance away splits in the exact same place like it's suffered the exact same wound.

MARISHA: Oh, cool.

ASHLEY: That's right, that right. Okay.

MATT: All right. Does that finish your turn?

MARISHA: DM, this seems to be the main source of giving us extra eyes, right? Is the eyeballs?

MATT: So far.

MARISHA: Okay.

LAURA: That and the pattern, which we all saved against.

MATT: Indeed. All righty, that the end of your turn, Yasha?

TRAVIS: That's going to give us two.

ASHLEY: Yes.

MATT: All right. End of your turn, we come back to the lair action at 20. With this, he'll do Gravity Well. Suddenly--

LAURA: Oh no.

SAM: Gravity!

MATT: -- the aether that allows you to coast through the air becomes thin and you find yourselves, those who are aloft, slowly drawn back to the surface.

SAM: Slowly.

MATT: Nobody takes fall damage.

SAM: Okay, okay, okay.

MATT: But each of you are now, who have been up in the air, are reduced back to being on the ground.

MARISHA: Mm-mm. Mm-mm.

LIAM: So no more floaty floats.

MARISHA: Don't like it.

TRAVIS: I'm sure there's no follow-up to this move.

MARISHA: What's it feel like?

MATT: It just feels like the winds of aether that you're used to riding are gone.

MARISHA: No, I mean the ground.

MATT: Oh, the ground. It's solid, but still spongy.

TRAVIS: Waterbed or gymnastics flooring?

LAURA: Like walking on a gym floor mat, yeah.

MATT: Split the difference.

SAM: Have you been to an Ethiopian restaurant? Is it like the bread they serve?

MATT: Sure, yeah, yeah, there you go.

TRAVIS: The spongy-like, yeah, yeah, yeah.

SAM: It's good.

TRAVIS: It's really good, yeah.

LIAM: Everybody, after your action, just jump up. (laughter) That's your last thing.

MATT: All righty.

TRAVIS: Pick your knees up. (laughter)

TALIESIN: Freeze frame.

TRAVIS: Yeah, everybody leaping.

MATT: Finishes the lair action. Veth, you're up, with the Eyes of Somnovem on deck.

SAM: He's right on me. I'm scared.

MARISHA: Yep, yeah.

TRAVIS: You're good, you got this.

MARISHA: You can disengage. You got some of that rogue shit, right?

SAM: I have an action.

MARISHA: To disengage.

SAM: I could and walk half by movement away.

MARISHA: That's yucky.

TALIESIN: And then also take damage because--

TRAVIS: Imagine that the city dies.

MARISHA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: You got high intelligence, right?

SAM: I'm going to try-- I'm going to-- I'm going to just try to focus on Lucien. I can't really do any damage because nothing's in melee with him except for me. So I will imagine, I will use my action to imagine that three tarot cards appear before him and flip over and the middle one is the silver dragon card. This is Mollymauk's deck, and I say to him: Oh good, you drew the silver dragon. It's a sign of virtue. It means you're a worthwhile wonderful person. It confirms your purity. You're a good person, remember that. I don't know.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: Card's called The Judge. You're cool, all right. (laughter)

MATT: Go ahead and roll a d20, adding your wisdom modifier and the number of eyes you have. You do not have advantage because that round is over.

SAM: d20 plus what?

MATT: Plus your wisdom modifier and the number of eyes you have.

SAM: Okay, 14.

MATT: 14. It was not a challenging-- an attack. It is enough for the cards to apparate and float in the air in front of Lucien. Lucien glances over towards them confusedly and scoffs. The scoff echoing through the room.

SAM: As he was looking at it, can I try to slip around the dick?

MATT: Sure.

TRAVIS: ♪ Slip around the dick. ♪ (laughter)

MARISHA: Take a chance.

MATT: Half your movement. (laughter)

TALIESIN: Take a chance. Jesus.

MATT: He does get an attack of opportunity on you, but I will say it's a disadvantage because you distracted him with a card deck.

SAM: Okay, okay. I'll take it.

MATT: Natural one on the first roll, so he misses you. Don't even have to roll the second on, it's disadvantage.

LAURA: He stabbed himself with one of his wings.

MATT: Goes to strike and still seems a bit confused by the card before the card scatters to ash and he strikes the air where it was angrily. All right. That finish your turn, Veth?

SAM: That's all I can do.

MATT: All right.

SAM: Oh, wait, do I have to roll for Slow?

MATT: You do.

SAM: And this is a--?

LAURA: Dex save.

SAM: Bye. (laughs) (laughter)

SAM: Dex save?

MATT: Yeah.

SAM: 16. Save? This is a 26, minus two is 24.

MATT: You are no longer slowed.

SAM and MARISHA: Hey! (cheering)

MARISHA: Huzzah!

MATT: You shrug off the grief and are now free to act as you wish. As soon as I can get this off of your fucking mini. All righty. That finishes Veth's turn. It's now the eyes' turn. Vigilan can-- Vigilan is banished, so Vigilan is just going to continue floating wherever Vigilan is at the moment. Now, the three other eyes are going to be-- Okay. That is--

MARISHA: Ew, I just spit everywhere.

LIAM: Shouldn't have taken a chance. (giggling)

MATT: Luctus vanishes from the field and is instead replaced with Elatis. You watch the eyes shifting into another member of the Somnovem.

TRAVIS: Luctus is removed, Elatis takes its place?

MATT: Indeed.

TRAVIS: Is there a tie made to Elatis from Timorei?

MATT: No.

LAURA: Or Luctus is still tied wherever it is?

MATT: Wherever it is, it's still tied. Timorei actually remains. And then Fastidan comes and replaces Gaudius up top of the building.

LAURA: Oh jeez.

TRAVIS: Interesting.

TRAVIS: Watch out for that fucking Fastidan.

MATT: With that, Fastidan is going to go ahead and take his turn. Cannot target you because you are not visible to them, and is going to target-- Let's see. Let's target Yasha.

ASHLEY: Oh, okay.

MATT: The eye glances over towards you after you were the one that struck the other eye. Timorei is still looking damaged. I need you to go ahead and make a constitution saving throw.

ASHLEY: Whoa, my brain is doing weird shit. 25.

MATT: Yeah, that definitely succeeds. So you only take-- 21 points of necrotic damage

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: As the eye looks down at you with this withering ray that seems to just be filled with malign disgust and hatred for you. This sense of something that despises your very existence, and you manage to just hold on and know that you're worth what you're worth. And it still stings, but you hold tight. So that will finish its go. Timorei is going to go ahead and look over towards-- You, Jester. Need you go ahead and make a wisdom saving throw, if you don't mind. With advantage, of course.

SAM: Of course.

LAURA: 16.

MATT: 16 is a failure. You take-- 21 points of psychic damage. As it blasts your mind and fills you with absolute terror, you are frightened for one minute or until you manage to save from this effect.

LAURA: Oh wait, I'm immune to being frightened.

MATT: Then you are not frightened, but you still take the psychic damage. And you gain another eye.

LAURA: My first eye!

MATT: So you have your first eye-- As you pull back and I shrug it off, you look down at your palms and you see one appear in your right hand.

LAURA: Can it be on my wrist since I wore an eye bracelet?

MATT: Sure. Why not?

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: Sure. (laughter)

LIAM: You never forget your first.

ASHLEY: Now you can manipulate the space.

LAURA: Wait. One, two, three, four. Yasha has none. Veth has how many?

SAM: Eyes? Two.

LAURA: Caleb has four. Caduceus has?

TALIESIN: Two.

LIAM: Dos.

TALIESIN: I found my little eye marker. It's got a little eye

MATT: And then Elatis is going to go ahead and glance over towards you, Caduceus.

TALIESIN: Talk to me in the middle of this?

MATT: Make an intelligence saving throw for me, please.

TALIESIN: Why? (laughs)

MATT: Minus the number of eyes you have.

TALIESIN: Oh, that's cool. Well, that's a good roll for me, so-- 13.

MATT: That's a failure, unfortunately.

TALIESIN: I don't know if I can succeed a strength saving throw. Oh, it's an intelligence saving throw?

MATT: It is. Yes.

TALIESIN: Oh, that's even lower, then. That's okay. (laughter)

MATT: There you go. As the eye of Elatis gazes upon you, you suddenly no longer see the battlefield around you, but you see the Blooming Grove at the height of its health. You look ahead and see your family emerge and hold their arms out and say, "Caduceus, come!" And you feel this overwhelming excitement and joy as you run and dash towards them as it pulls you towards Lucien you move your full movement.

TALIESIN: Which is-- Oh, that's walking movement, okay.

MATT: Yeah. Walking movement, which is 30, correct?

TALIESIN: Yes.

MATT: Towards Lucien, plus a double move.

TALIESIN: I run?

MATT: Yes.

TALIESIN: Oh boy.

MATT: You're pulled up right against Lucien.

LAURA: Hi.

MATT: All righty. You also gain another eye.

LAURA: (sighs)

MARISHA: That's four for you?

TALIESIN: Three.

MARISHA: Three?

TALIESIN: (like Count von Count) Three eyes, ah ah ah.

MATT: That finishes their turn. Caleb, you're up. Caduceus, you're on deck.

TALIESIN: Fuck.

SAM: Caleb, we don't need these people. Let's just flee. You and me, let's just go.

LIAM: You're badly hurt, right?

SAM: No, I'm fine.

LIAM: I am going to focus on the eye and use my imagination to try to pull it apart like a black hole turning matter into spaghetti and flinging it into all directions. The one that's at the center of the battlefield.

MATT: Timorei?

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: Come on.

MATT: Go ahead and roll d20, add your wisdom modifier and the number of eyes you have.

LIAM: No longer at advantage?

MATT: No longer at advantage.

MARISHA: Big imagination. No whammies.

LIAM: 34.

SAM: Whoa!

MATT: Okay. Okay.

ASHLEY: Jeez!

MATT: Go ahead and roll--

MARISHA: What did you roll?

LIAM: 19.

MARISHA: Jesus!

MATT: That's amazing. Go ahead and roll 3d10.

LIAM: 3d10.

TALIESIN: This is a weird fight, man.

MARISHA: Kill it!

MATT: It rolled the low saving throw, so it does full damage.

LIAM: 21.

MATT: 21 points of necrotic damage to it.

LIAM: And is it connected--

MATT: You see as it begins to be dragged and torn and you can almost hear a voiceless scream piercing in the middle of all your minds before it withdraws, barely holding onto whatever its flesh form currently is.

LIAM: And was this eye connected to another eye?

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Yes, you do not see the tether, though the energy is still crackling around it.

LIAM: And for bonus action, I'm going to just stare at our friend and say: Please, don't give up. You can find your own life again. There will be time for that later.

MATT: Bonus action?

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: Go ahead and make a persuasion check.

LIAM: That is a 27.

MATT: 27. And with that, Lucien loses a legendary action.

MARISHA: Hey!

LAURA: Oh, it actually worked!

SAM: We won.

MARISHA: Wow. You rolled a 27, though.

LIAM: Yeah.

MARISHA: It's high.

MATT: As you say that, suddenly you see Lucien whip over in your direction and without the mouth moving, you just hear the voice piercing into your mind, oppressively so. As if another will is strangling yours within your own brain, and says, "You can't bully me. It wasn't me. He's gone, and you all will die and join me."

LIAM: Bullshit.

MATT: That finish your turn?

LIAM: Yes.

MATT: Okay. That brings us to Caduceus. Jester, you're on deck.

TALIESIN: I'm in a dream right now.

LIAM: ♪ Rewind! ♪

TRAVIS: (laughs)

MATT: Yeah. Well, the dream has faded at this point.

TALIESIN: Oh.

MATT: It was a brief vision that pulled up there, and then as soon as you stood there, you looked confused as to why you were there. You glance right up into the massive bulbous form of Cognouza Incarnate.

TALIESIN: Well, I can do a little right now, and I'm going to cast for the moment, I have no doubt that this is going to go away. Actually, does Freedom of Movement mean I can't be-- that people can't take reactions when I move away from them? No, they can still take reaction.

MATT: They can still take reaction. Pretty sure.

TALIESIN: That was just hope.

MATT: I'll double check.

TALIESIN: That'll change things a little bit.

MATT: Yeah, it just means your speed cannot be reduced.

TALIESIN: Okay. I'm going to cast Spirit Guardians at level three.

MATT: Ooh.

TALIESIN: So for beginning, I believe that, as I cast it, it immediately is an attack on anything within that 15-foot sphere that I designate is a problem. So that's a wisdom save?

MATT: Checking on thing real fast.

TALIESIN: "When a creature enters the area for the first time on a turn--"

MATT: On a turn, so it doesn't take it immediately, but at the start of its turn, it will.

TALIESIN: Okay. That'll do.

MATT: So that is up.

TALIESIN: And then I'm going to spin around to flank away from Jester so we're not a big fat target right there.

MATT: Around over here, you mean?

TALIESIN: Yeah. I don't want to be a double cheeseburger over here. I want to be a single.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: (chuckling)

MATT: So you dart around to the opposite side.

TALIESIN: Beyond burger?

MATT: You can move--

LAURA: Single be-- Caduceus would be a Beyond burger.

MATT: -- five more feet if you want to.

TALIESIN: Yeah, he would be a veggie, obviously a veggie offering.

MATT: Okay. You've got it.

TALIESIN: May have had one recently.

MATT: That finish your turn, Caduceus?

TALIESIN: Yes. Well-- You know what? I'm going to take a bonus action for this.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: I'm going to look this meat husk in the eye and just say: From everything they've told me, I'm very disappointed so far, Molly. Snap out of it.

MATT: Make a persuasion check.

TALIESIN: That's a-- Yep, all right. That's a 12.

MATT: That's a 12. You see as the emerged, extended upper torso of Lucien You see as the emerged, extended upper torso of Lucien curve around in the space to meet you and say, "Careful where you're looking. You might miss the world around you." Points past your shoulder. Does that finish your turn?

TRAVIS: Oh shit.

TALIESIN: Yes.

MATT: That's your action, bonus, and movement. Well, at the end of your turn, he's going to use a legendary action to have Fastidan. As he points up, you glance over, right up as the eye at the top of the building looks upon you and you feel the sudden hatred and loathing come crashing down upon you. Make a constitution saving throw for me.

TALIESIN: (blows raspberry)

LAURA: Oh!

TALIESIN: Come on-- Hey!

MATT: Minus the eyes you have.

TALIESIN: Aw. Ay! (laughter) 19!

MATT: 19 succeeds!

TALIESIN: Yay! (cheering)

MATT: You take--

TALIESIN: Watched my con bonus just go--

MATT: You take only 28 points of necrotic damage from that.

TALIESIN: "Only" 28 points.

MATT: Yes.

TALIESIN: Cool. Cool, cool, cool, cool. That's great.

MATT: All right.

TALIESIN: And I'll do that. What's the save on that? Concentration is wisdom save?

MATT: Correct.

TALIESIN: Yay! Yeah, yeah. Good. Cool.

MATT: You're good for half the damage? All right. Cool. Finishing your turn, Jester, you're up. Fjord, you're on deck.

LAURA: Okay. Okay, for my bonus action I'm going to say: This is a really good costume you've got going on, Molly, but nothing will ever be as good as your egg dick. (laughter) And in combo with that-- (laughter)

SAM: Combo move.

LAURA: It's a combo move!

LIAM: C-c-combo!

LAURA: I'm going to visualize-- (laughter)

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: The giant pillar in front of him turning into a giant dick covered in eggs, scrambled eggs. turning into a giant dick covered in eggs, scrambled eggs. And I'm going to use it as a giant bludgeoning device to fall forward and smack him in the face.

MARISHA: Yes! Come on!

TRAVIS: That's my child's mother.

MATT: Go ahead and roll a d20, add your wisdom modifier and the number of eyes you have.

LIAM: I mean, in character to the end.

TALIESIN: This is how my parents said I'd die.

LAURA: That would be a 22.

MATT: (chuckles) So--

TRAVIS: Yeah! (cheering)

SAM: Egg dick attack!

MATT: The slightly twisting and moving tower of veins and eyes begins to shift to a majestic bell head. (hysterical laughter)

TRAVIS: Knob head!

MATT: Before it winds back, and like one of those old inflatable punch dummies, whack! Just slams the form of Lucien, who retracts from the impact. Go ahead and roll an attack roll using your spell attack modifier to see how badly you hit.

LIAM: Astral dick graffiti.

LAURA: That would be 18.

MATT: 18. Okay. So I'll say it's half damage on this, so go ahead and roll 2d12 bludgeoning damage.

TRAVIS: Dick whip it.

LAURA: ♪ Dick whip it ♪ Hold on. Where's my other 12? I'll just roll this one twice.

TALIESIN: This is funny on nine levels right now, and so many of them are so personal.

LAURA: So 18 plus my spell modifier?

MATT: No, just 18.

LAURA: Oh, okay.

MATT: 18 points of bludgeoning damage, and make a persuasion check. (giggles)

LAURA: Oh, that's good!

TRAVIS: All those times you were beaten by scrambled egg dicks?

LAURA: That's a--

MARISHA: Crushed by an egg dick.

LAURA: 22.

MATT: 22 barely begins to scrape through his will.

ASHLEY: But with an eye?

LAURA: Oh, with the eye! 23!

MATT: Well, the eye doesn't add to persuasion checks.

LAURA: Oh, okay.

MATT: But still, it barely scrapes through. It works.

LAURA: Okay. Oh, good!

MATT: So he does lose a legendary action. And as the impact happens, (chuckles) (snarls) And angrily glances over in your direction. Is that the end of your turn?

LAURA: No! I'm going to use my movement. Would he get an attack of opportunity against me? Okay, I'm going to run away. I'm going to run away to the other side of that moundy well thing that I see. I'm going to jump up and--

MATT: Run around over here?

LAURA: Yeah, I'm going to hide on the other side of the well, yeah.

MATT: That'll be your full movement to get over there. You've got it. That finishes your turn, Jester? At the end of your turn, he's going to use another legendary action. And angrily take Fastidan, who's now a furious interest in this point, aim it towards you, Jester. I need you to make a constitution saving throw minus the number of eyes you have.

TRAVIS: Fastidan to the middle of the map?

MATT: Fastidan's right up here.

TRAVIS: Oh, that's right.

SAM: He's a sniper.

MATT: A sniper on the building.

TRAVIS: Right, right, right.

TALIESIN: We've got to deal with these things.

LAURA: N-n-nine!

MATT: Nine? Oh.

TALIESIN: I mean, there's a lot happening, but.

MARISHA: Yeah.

LAURA: Ooh, that's a lot of dice rolling.

SAM: We still don't know where Ira or Culpussy is.

MARISHA: Mm-hmm.

SAM: They could be anywhere.

MATT: You take 50 points of necrotic damage.

LAURA: Holy sh--

MATT: And you find yourself doubling over onto your knees as every mistake you feel you've made in your life is bludgeoned upon you. And this eye's sense of just absolute disinterest in your existence and willing you to die is causing your body to physically wither. Finishing that--

LAURA: I should make a concentration check, too, and I rolled a 20 on it.

MATT: So with that--

TALIESIN: With advantage?

MARISHA: Oh shit.

LAURA: 20, I mean, my con is low.

MATT: That's a lot of damage.

LIAM: Took a massive hit. That'd be a high roll.

LAURA: Yeah, I'd have to roll at least 25 in order to--

MATT: To maintain it, yeah. With that, Fjord, your turn.

TRAVIS: Oh. We're still on the ground, right?

MATT: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Yep. Cool. Nice. I'm going to walk this way and peek around this edge.

SAM: ♪ Walk this way! ♪

MATT: There?

TRAVIS: Uh-huh.

MATT: Okay. You can see the eye of Elatis is just within the fog.

TALIESIN: Cool.

TRAVIS: Cool, cool, cool. I'm going to fire one-- I'm going to Eldritch Blast and I'm going to fire one of the three towards, which one is this again?

MATT: That's Timorei. Go ahead and roll an attack.

TALIESIN: Oh wow, you got two down that way.

TRAVIS: That's 19.

MATT: 19 hits. Go ahead and roll damage.

TRAVIS: Okay. Great. 14 points of force damage.

MATT: Timorei splits and scatters into blood and flesh across Yasha and across your torso. And in all of your minds, you hear a screeching scream as not one, but two members of the Somnovem simultaneously, one unseen, perish with finality.

ASHLEY: Mm-hmm!

SAM: Nice!

TRAVIS: Okay. I'll send the other-- I'll see that splatter and turn the other one and I'll look up at the sniper up at the tower and send the next two up towards--

MATT: Fastidan? Go for it.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MATT: He does have partial cover up there, so he has a +5 to his AC.

TRAVIS: Oh, jesus. Okay. That's a 22 to hit.

MATT: Actually it'll be +2, because it's not-- Was it 22 to hit?

TRAVIS: 22.

MATT: That still hits!

TRAVIS: Okay, great! And the last one is exact same roll. 22.

MATT: Yeah, both hit.

TRAVIS: Two 11s.

MATT: That's great. Even with the partial cover, both blasts still strike Fastidan at the top of the tower.

TRAVIS: 13, and exact same roll. 13 and 13. 26 points of force damage.

MATT: 26 points of force damage. Nice!

TRAVIS: And I will use the rest of my movement to tuck back behind the wall.

MATT: You've got it.

TALIESIN: You going to keep that eye in the mist?

TRAVIS: No, because then you won't be able to see him either.

TALIESIN: Fair.

MATT: All righty. Finishing Fjord's turn, uses his last legendary action. And between the two that are still up. Yeah, it's going to go ahead and Fastidan once more is going to peek over towards you. And... It has to make a charisma saving throw, right, to get past the protection?

LIAM: That's right. It can attempt to--

MATT: As an action to break through, correct?

LIAM: This is this-- Hold on, I'm looking at the wrong effect. Pulling it up. Yeah. 15 charisma check.

MATT: 15 charisma check.

MARISHA: Come on.

MATT: It's a natural 20.

LIAM: Well, that works.

MATT: So Fastidan-- Oh, mind you. It can't do anything, but at least Fastidan is able to, in the future, get through your barrier.

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: Just Fastidan now. Okay. That finishes that go. We are back up at the top of the round. Beau, you are up, with Essek on deck.

MARISHA: Help me out, DM. I see Fastidan is on the top of the pillar over here, yeah?

MATT: Yep.

MARISHA: Where's the other eyeballs?

MATT: Right now you just see this one and this one. Vigilan has been banished and the other one was destroyed.

MARISHA: What's this one? Luctus?

MATT: That's Elatis.

MARISHA: That's Elatis?

MATT: This is Fastidan.

LAURA: Vigilan would have come back, though, from the Banishment because my concentration dropped.

MATT: That's right. So Vigilan has reappeared where it was left last time, which was over here.

LAURA: Right.

MATT: So Vigilan is visible now.

LIAM: Oh god.

TALIESIN: Well, that's a problem again.

MARISHA: Okay.

MATT: Which means that this currently--

MARISHA: Shit!

TALIESIN: It's not dead, it's just got a chunk taken out of it.

MATT: This is still around because you did move out of where that would have been.

MARISHA: So he's still looking backwards?

MATT: Currently that way.

MARISHA: Five, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30, 35, 40, 45. I can think I can make it. Yeah. Fuck these eyeballs. I'm going to go after... Vigilan.

MATT: Okay. You are on the ground, so you have your ground movement.

MARISHA: 55.

MATT: 45 gets you into melee with Vigilan.

MARISHA: All right, I'm just going to whale on this motherfucker!

LIAM: Like a punching bag.

MATT: As a note, and actually, this is important for me to note and I should have, I forgot to mention, too. As the previous Eye of the Somnovem was destroyed and slain, blown apart, you watched Lucien (pained grunt) visually react with pain at the loss of the eye.

SAM: Okay!

TALIESIN: Cool beans.

LAURA: Oh, that's good!

MARISHA: Interesting.

LIAM: He's hurt by loss of eyes.

TRAVIS: It seemed to hurt him.

LAURA: Oh yeah, because two went away at once, so that would've really hit him hard.

MARISHA: Okay.

LAURA: Okay. That's good to know.

MARISHA: All right, I'm going to whale on this guy.

LIAM: Get it, Beauregerd!

MARISHA: Pop! Pop! All righty. All righty! First attack. 26.

MATT: Hits.

MARISHA: Second attack. 23.

MATT: Hits.

MARISHA: All right! I wonder if these things can be stunned. Probably not, right?

LAURA: I don't know.

MARISHA: Shit rolls. Okay. First one is a 10. (laughter)

MATT: 10?

MARISHA: Other one is nine damage. So 19 for those two.

MATT: 19 points of damage to Vigilan, you got it.

LIAM: Lucien's immune to stun, right?

LAURA: Yes.

MARISHA: Yeah.

LIAM: Probably an extension of.

MARISHA: Yeah, it's got to be, right?

LIAM: Got to be. Especially if it hurts him to lose one.

TALIESIN: Can you still Extract Aspects or no?

MARISHA: I mean, I did. It's all still the same.

TALIESIN: Yeah, it's all still the same.

TRAVIS: Well, for him.

MARISHA: For him, but here, I'm about to do it anyway. I'm about to do Flurry of Blows on this one.

MATT: You got it.

MARISHA: Yep. Yikes. Let's see. 19 and 18.

MATT: Both hit the eye, which does not have the same AC as Lucien, so yes.

MARISHA: Okay! Okay.

LAURA: Eyes are pretty vulnerable.

MARISHA: That's true. Where did all my d8s go?! Here they are. All right. Okay. 15 damage for one and 10 damage for the other. So 25.

MATT: 25.

MARISHA: I might as well Extract Aspects, I guess, while I'm here.

MATT: It is vulnerable to psychic damage.

SAM: Ooh!

MATT: Is immune to charm, fright, and stun.

MARISHA: But vulnerable to psychic damage.

MATT: Correct.

MARISHA: Okay.

LAURA: That makes sense because he did the pyramids against him. The intuit charges.

MARISHA: Okay. So I just think in my head and I just and I project it out to everybody's brain and I go: These fucking eyes are fucking-- We could get psychic damage!

MATT: (laughs)

MARISHA: I say it way cooler, though, in everybody's head!

MATT: I understand. Totally. No worries.

MARISHA: Their brains are goopy!

MATT: The eye looks very hurt, but it's still standing.

MARISHA: These eyeballs fuck! (laughter) Okay. That's my turn.

MATT: Okay. Finishing your turn, Essek's go. Essek is going to go ahead and-- Kind of hearing that, though it doesn't have much in the way of psychic damage at the moment. He's going to go ahead and move up. Slowed, so he can't move that far.

SAM: Lucien is--

MATT: Is going to go ahead and cast a--

SAM: Resistant to fire or no?

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: A 3rd-level Magic Missile, honestly, is probably the best bet to the already damaged Vigilan eye that you did.

MARISHA: Kill it!

MATT: So at you say that, slowed and coming forward on his feet, the ground seems to seep beneath his steps as he-- (grimaces)

LAURA: Ooh, he's having to walk?

MATT: Yeah. Yeah, with him, which is really rough.

MARISHA: Bad day for Essek.

LAURA: Bad day.

MARISHA: He's got soft little feet.

TRAVIS: Little calves.

LAURA: He's like Sam.

SAM: Yeah!

MATT: Clutching his side. As he steps towards you, Beau, and seeing you damaging those things, "Let's see if we can finish this together." (grunts) And releases a 3rd-level Magic Missile towards it.

LAURA: Yay!

TALIESIN: Yeah!

TRAVIS: Never skip leg day.

LAURA: He's going to be so sore. His calves are going to be so sore.

TRAVIS: It's like running in barefoot shoes.

LIAM: He's never done one squat. (chuckling) Not one.

MATT: That does it.

TRAVIS: Why would you choose--

LAURA: Yeah!

TRAVIS: Yeah?

LAURA: I don't know why I did the shake weight. (laughs) (cheering)

TRAVIS: Let chaos reign! (laughter)

LIAM: Just grabbing eye stalks. (laughter)

SAM: Which one did he kill?

MATT: Vigilan.

SAM: Vigilus?

MATT: The antimagic cone eye, Vigilan has been destroyed. And with it, Lucien (grimaces) and yells physically, but gives a shout and a scream through all of your minds of multiple voices that causes all of you to wince in pain. It doesn't do psychic damage, but there is fury mounting in Lucien. All right. Does that finish your turn? Oh no, that was Essek's turn. That finishes Essek's turn. He's going to make a save to see if he can shake off the Slow.

MARISHA: Come on!

MATT: He's rolled two natural ones in a row. I'm not even joking. Both turns. So he's still slowed.

TALIESIN: He's got a lot of baggage.

MATT: It is now Lucien's go.

SAM: He was walking.

TALIESIN: He should feel bad.

MARISHA: You're not wrong.

MATT: Lucien--

TALIESIN: Lucien has to make save at the beginning of his turn.

MATT: Yes, he does. That would be, what save is it? Dexterity?

TALIESIN: I'm finding it again because I'm that guy.

LAURA: Spirit Guardians?

MATT: Was it wisdom?

TALIESIN: Spirit Guardians is a wisdom save.

MATT: He rolled an 18 wisdom.

TALIESIN: It's an 18 save.

MATT: He saves. Takes half damage still.

TALIESIN: Yeah. Yep. And that's a wisdom 18. That's 3d8. I'm doing it. I like that d8 better. That's okay. 13 points of radiant damage.

MATT: You got it, so flashes off of them. "(grunting) I think you should join us." And glances up towards you, Caleb, and is going to use his Wail Aether attack again. The first effect is going to be Summon Cataclysm, as opposed to creating one is going to, you feel the top of the tower shift beneath your feet as it (crumbling) breaks off. And floats in the air with you on top of it before it shoots down towards Essek.

TRAVIS: Oh my god, he threw a tower at you!

MARISHA: Yeah, he did.

TRAVIS: At Essek!

LAURA: Oh god!

MATT: So you have disadvantage because you were on the tower, I'm sorry, advantage on the attack against you.

TRAVIS: He threw another moon at me.

MARISHA: Yeah! (laughter)

MATT: That's going to be a 26 to hit you?

TRAVIS: Uh, yeah, sure.

MATT: And Essek-- Actually, rolled a natural one.

SAM: Again!

MATT: Again. Well, this is Essek not getting hit. Essek still takes half damage, but he isn't restrained. He manages to push away from there. So you, Caleb, take--

LIAM: Oh boy.

MARISHA: Where are you at?

LIAM: I'm at full at the moment.

MARISHA: Okay.

LAURA: Get ready.

LIAM: Yeah.

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah.

LAURA: This is Lucien's turn right now?

MATT: Yeah. Yes, and I need you to make a strength saving throw for me.

LIAM: Oh, that'll go well.

TRAVIS: (chuckles nervously)

LIAM: Matt Colville meteorite die. Great, that's a four.

LAURA: Oh no! Bye-bye.

TALIESIN: No, you don't know. You don't know!

MATT: You take 38 points of bludgeoning damage. Okay.

MATT: And you are restrained as you're now trapped beneath this portion of a tower.

TALIESIN: Did I give you Freedom of Movement a million years ago or no? Or was that a million, million years?

LIAM: Doesn't sound familiar to me.

TALIESIN: That was a Death Ward, sorry.

LAURA: All things considered, you've got an entire tower.

SAM: That's your own tower now! Just like Yussa!

MATT: So you are restrained and pinned to the ground.

LIAM: This is the Somnovem for All Things Considered. (laughter)

LAURA: And you're restrained.

MATT: Indeed.

LIAM: Sure. Cool.

MATT: All righty.

LIAM: Cool. Cool, cool, cool.

MATT: Finishing that one go of Summon Cataclysm, he's going to go ahead and do--

TRAVIS: Offer surrender?

SAM: Parley?

TRAVIS: Peace treaty?

MATT: Let's do Nightmare Cage to--

SAM: Nightmare Cage.

MATT: -- you, Caduceus.

TALIESIN: Sure.

MATT: Make a dexterity saving throw, please.

TALIESIN: All right.

MARISHA: Dex save.

TALIESIN: Dex save. Minus eyes?

MATT: Mm-hmm.

TALIESIN: That's just not even fair. That's 14.

MATT: 14 is a failure.

TALIESIN: Yep.

MATT: As you're curving behind Lucien and watch this tower slam into the ground, you look over and suddenly feel this movement beneath you. And you look down just as this tether reaches up and sinks into your chest. It doesn't hurt, but suddenly your vision is pulled and your consciousness of the space around you begins to fade. Caduceus, you're now standing in the middle of the Blooming Grove, where once you'd just visualized a moment ago beautiful and blooming, you look around and see the trees withering, the ground itself rolling as teeth and eyes and tendrils begin to consume and curl over, the entire world around you is being absorbed by Cognouza as it has stepped through to ethereal plane and is coming to complete its destiny of making Exandria a part of itself. You look behind to see your family and they're screaming for help, as you see themselves being pulled down into the ground as the teeth begins to draw them deeper and deeper within. So. That finishes his turn. Bringing it now to Yasha.

ASHLEY: Okay.

SAM: Where is Caduceus, by the way?

MATT: Caduceus is on this side of him.

SAM: But like in melee?

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Yes.

SAM: Okay, good to know. Good to know.

ASHLEY: I have a -2 to persuasion, so I would literally have to roll a natural 20 to talk to Lucien.

LAURA: Don't waste the bonus.

ASHLEY: Okay. Oh, that's an action.

TALIESIN: How many eyes are still on the board?

MARISHA: There's the one--

SAM: Two.

MATT: There's two of them.

TALIESIN: Two. Two eyes.

MATT: Elatis and Fastidan.

ASHLEY: Okay.

SAM: And Marine Layer.

ASHLEY: I am going to-- Bamf out my wings.

MATT: All right, so that's your action? The wings emerge, which would give you a fly speed this turn.

ASHLEY: It would.

MATT: Because you are now, the gravity doesn't seem to affect you at the moment.

ASHLEY: But then I wouldn't have an attack.

MATT: You don't get an attack because you used your action to bamf your wings out. But your wings are out and that means future attacks are going to have a heavy bonus.

ASHLEY: Yeah. Okay. Oh god. I'm going to move a little bit over to Jester.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: Hi.

MATT: With your wings out?

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MATT: All righty. Are you flying or are you just staying on the ground?

ASHLEY: Flying.

MATT: How far up?

ASHLEY: Is there an eye over there?

MATT: No, the two eyes are here and here.

ASHLEY: Okay, okay. Yeah, I'll just get next to Jester.

MATT: Like 10 feet up-ish?

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MATT: Okay.

ASHLEY: Shit, that's an action, too. Okay, that's it.

MATT: Okay, but you are at the ready, blade there. (whooshing) Flying in the air, a visual bastion of the Storm Lord's strength, as you feel him well within you. All right, that finishes your turn. That brings us back to the next lair action.

SAM: Lair action.

MATT: Absorb Flesh.

LAURA: (whimpers)

MATT: All creatures within 20 feet of a terrain piece.

LAURA: Oh no.

MARISHA: Oh.

MATT: That would be--

SAM: Everybody?

MARISHA: Everybody?

MATT: That's everybody. Everybody, please make a strength saving throw.

MARISHA: Oh, is this trying to rip the flesh off of us?

MATT: No, the hungry city is attempting to absorb you.

TRAVIS: Oh, (laughs) cool.

MARISHA: Strength saving throw?

SAM: Is Yasha okay because she's floating?

MATT: Yasha would be--

LAURA: I'm going to die.

MATT: It's within 20 feet of a piece of terrain, which you are within, so everyone has to make it.

TRAVIS: 12.

SAM: What save is this?

MATT: 12, that's a failure.

TRAVIS: Yeah. Strength save.

TALIESIN: Minus eyes?

MATT: Minus eyes, yeah.

LIAM: Oh, minus eyes, ooh!

LAURA: 11.

MATT: Failure.

LIAM: Minus eyes, four.

MATT: Failure.

SAM: Strength save?

MATT: Correct.

SAM: Natural 20, so 18.

MATT: 18, success.

SAM: Ah!

ASHLEY: Is this considered a spell or a magical effect?

MATT: I'll say, no, this is a lair action. It's the natural--

TRAVIS: Physical.

ASHLEY: 19.

MATT: Success.

ASHLEY: Okay.

TALIESIN: 17.

MATT: Success.

TALIESIN: Hey!

MARISHA: I rolled a natural one.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: So I'm going to spend a ki point to reroll.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: I have a question, too.

MARISHA: No, 10 total, minus eyes, for six.

MATT: Failure. Everyone who failed, you take four points of psychic damage.

SAM: Oh.

MATT: As you feel your feet begin to sink into the ground, and portions of the terrain began to reach out and grab you, and you sense the city trying to reach your mind physically. It's trying to pull you in and make you part of itself.

LIAM: I have two questions.

MATT: Yes?

LIAM: Mind Blank protects from all mind fuckery, wisdom, all that--

MATT: Yeah.

LIAM: Up to Wish level. And also, I've got the scroll of Protection from Aberrations. Is all the goo that I'm sitting in aberration?

MATT: Actually, yeah, all of Cognouza would be considered an aberration, so you are unaffected.

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: You are.

LIAM: Four points, guys, four points.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MARISHA: That's going to come in handy later.

LIAM: Yeah.

MARISHA: In a big way.

MATT: So you are unaffected. But all the rest of you who failed, you are considered grappled.

TRAVIS and LIAM: Grappled.

LIAM: Well, I'm under a building, so that might--

MATT: So, just keep that in mind. Yeah, you are-- (laughs)

LAURA: You didn't take four points though, so--

TRAVIS: You're under a building, and you're like: Augh, really, bitch? (laughter)

LIAM: Terminator.

TRAVIS: "I've got you." Yeah, yeah.

MATT: Veth, you're up.

SAM: Okay, I will rock around the stalagmite,

SAM: Okay, I will rock around the stalagmite, and pop out the other side, and do I charge up the bolt? We want max damage here, right?

LAURA: Get the eyes, get the eyes.

SAM: The thing is the eyes-- well, one of the eyes, the one of the tower, I can't get sneak attack damage on, so that's pointless. In fact, both of them, I can't, because I'm not hidden. I could try to hide, and then maybe, maybe, but they know where I am. But I can get sneak attack damage on Lucien, so I think that's better spent.

TALIESIN: Is the other eye in-- I was going to say, is the eye on the ground in combat with anybody?

LIAM: You can disagree and you could run to--

MATT: Both of those eyes, none of them are in combat.

TALIESIN: Okay, so.

TRAVIS: Are there two eyes on the ground over there?

MATT: There's one over there--

SAM: There's two eyes. Yeah, the other one's over there.

MATT: And the other one's over here.

SAM: I could try to hide and get it, but--

TALIESIN: They're already in combat, though.

SAM: Huh?

MATT: Neither of the eyes are in combat.

TALIESIN: Oh, they're not in combat, never mind.

MATT: Sorry, they're both separate, on their own.

TALIESIN: I'm a crazy person, never mind.

MATT: It's all good. Your call, Veth.

SAM: All right, I'm going to shoot at Lucien because that's a guaranteed sneak attack.

MATT: Go for it, roll an attack.

SAM: Okay, I'll just-- Not great, 18?

MATT: 18, does not hit.

SAM: (sighs) I'll use my reaction to (zoom) bring it back and--

MATT: Go for it.

SAM: -- shoot again.

LAURA: Yeah, you're not being slowed.

SAM: Even worse.

LAURA: No.

LIAM: (groans)

MATT: (zoop, zoop) You actually have to duck out of the way as it almost tries to return towards you.

SAM: And I will bonus action fire again.

MATT: Go for it.

SAM: Come on, one of these has got to hit, yeah, 32.

MATT: That hits.

SAM: 31.

MATT: Go ahead and roll damage.

SAM: Okay, okay, okay, okay. That didn't-- 20, 30, 33, 40 points of damage!

MATT: Oof, nice. All righty, does that finish your turn, Veth?

SAM: Well, that's my bonus-- yeah--

MATT: Yeah, but you can still move if you want.

SAM: Yeah, I think I'll get away from Mr. Tealeaf. There's no real way to go. I guess I'll head on over to the bottom side of the tower.

MATT: Over here?

SAM: Yeah.

MATT: Or this way? This way?

SAM: Yeah, maybe I can get some cover there next round from one of the eyes, I don't know.

MATT: Okay, that's your movement to get next to the bottom side of the partially-crumbled tower that's on top of Caleb. That finishes Veth's turn. At the end of Veth's turn--

SAM: Are you in there, Caleb? Hello?

MATT: He's going to use a legendary action, and as you dart over, you sense a vision as you glance up to the top of the tower, as Fastidan focuses on you. I need you to make a constitution saving throw, Veth.

LAURA: Oh no.

SAM: Eight.

MATT: Eight is a failure.

TALIESIN: Oh boy.

MARISHA: Oh, this can't be good.

TALIESIN: He's making the ooh face.

LAURA and LIAM: Super not good.

TALIESIN: Oh, two rolls.

LAURA: Yeah, no, that one took a shit ton of-- it was like 50 points from me.

MARISHA: Yeah, it was full-on--

MATT: You take 51 points of necrotic damage.

SAM: (groans) I'm out.

LIAM: But it didn't go past the death point, right?

SAM: No, I mean, I'm dead.

LIAM: No, no, but if it had gone past your total hit point level in the negative, you'd have been instant--

TRAVIS: Okay.

MATT: Yeah. So as you look up, suddenly the Withering Gaze of Fastidan comes upon you, and the breath just (gasps) escapes you, as this green light surrounds you. Your flesh begins to crackle and blacken, and you fall to the ground. Your eyes go white and cloudy as you fall to the side, unconscious.

SAM: Okay, okay, okay.

MATT: All right, that finishes the end of Veth's turn. Now, it's the eyes' turn.

TRAVIS: Oh boy.

MARISHA: Oh.

TRAVIS: This got interesting. That changes stuff.

MARISHA: No, that wasn't the eye's turn, that was--

MATT: So now let's see who appears. Okay.

TALIESIN: Because there's--

MATT: Timorei can't come back.

TRAVIS: And Veth, are you right here?

LIAM: She's at the base of the tower.

SAM: Base of the tower, dead center.

TRAVIS: I see it, I see it.

LIAM: Dead center.

TRAVIS: Try to lean out.

MATT: Okay. So. (whooshes) Ira appears up on that side of the building.

SAM: Oh, fucking Ira.

MATT: (whooshes) And the burning angry red eye up on this side, a familiar face returns as Gaudius (whooshes) replaces Fastidan as the top building sniper, and the newcomer to this fray, Mirumus, replaces Elatis on this side. Ira--

LAURA: Oh, I see it.

MATT: -- is going to angrily stare down in that direction. As it does, a beam, (hisses) (explosion) detonates in this vicinity. I need Yasha, Jester, and Beauregard to make dexterity saving throws for me, please.

MARISHA: Come on.

LAURA: If you're grappled, are you at a disadvantage?

MATT: If you are grappled, no, grappled, no. Restrained can be bad, but.

LAURA: Strength saving throw?

MATT: Dex.

LAURA: Dex, okay. Minus the eye?

MATT: Yes. Okay, what'd you get?

LAURA: 20.

MATT: 20? You take 19 points of fire damage.

LAURA: Oh, (laughs) okay.

ASHLEY: 20.

MATT: 19 points of fire damage.

MARISHA: 18?

MATT: Minus the eyes?

MARISHA: Minus the eyes is 15-- or no, well, I have four eyes. 14.

MATT: 14 is a failure, so you take, sorry, 19 was the half, that would be 38 points of fire damage.

MARISHA: I'm going to spend a ki point to reroll.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: What, they were rolling 18s and 19s?

MATT: Correct, you do have evasion.

LAURA: If I had failed that--

MATT: You would take half that to 19 regardless, or you can spend a ki point.

LIAM: Zero on success, half on failure.

MARISHA: No, I will evade.

MATT: Okay, so you take 19 points of fire damage.

MARISHA: Okay.

MATT: That finishes Ira's turn. Gaudius is going to go ahead and glance over in the direction of Caduceus.

TALIESIN: I ain't there.

MATT: Caduceus, you feel the love expand from the heart of Gaudius as it invites you to join the right side of this fray. Go ahead and make a wisdom saving throw for me, minus the number of eyes you have.

TALIESIN: Would that work while I'm in a nightmare? Yeah, I guess it will.

MATT: Oh, you're in nightmare.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: So yeah, then no, it wouldn't even target you, you're fine.

TALIESIN: Okay.

MATT: Instead, it'll target you, Caleb, because you are the other one that it can kind of see as an--

LIAM: So new eye needs to make new check, right?

MATT: Well, actually, you have--

LIAM: Lots of cover.

MATT: Well, you have, what was the spell you cast?

LIAM: Mind Blank, so no mind control, no charm.

MATT: Yeah, no, it looks towards you, and it has no effect on you whatsoever. Your arcane defenses just immediately prevent anything.

LIAM: I'm in the mind palace!

SAM: (laughs)

MATT: That's good. Mirumus is going to go ahead, and glance over towards you, Yasha. I need you to go ahead and make a wisdom saving throw for me, please.

ASHLEY: (sighs)

TALIESIN: With advantage.

ASHLEY: Okay.

ASHLEY: Natural 20.

LAURA: Woo!

MARISHA: (frantic clapping)

MATT: Which comes to a total of?

ASHLEY: 20.

MATT: Great. (laughs)

SAM: With one eye?

MATT: Well, that's enough.

LAURA: No eyes.

ASHLEY: I don't have an eye.

MATT: You feel this sensation begin to fill in your body, this awestruck wonder, and you just shunt it out of your brain, you are over and done with being manipulated. No effect. That finishes the eyes' go that turn. That brings us to Caleb's turn.

LIAM: Straining under the weight of what's on top of me, I look around, I look up, I see Essek. I don't know where Veth is, or what's happened to her. I look in the distance, and I see how hurt Jester is, and I just sort of reach my hand up, and will her wounds to heal.

MATT: Okay, go ahead and make a d20 roll, adding your wisdom modifier and the number of eyes you have.

LIAM: That is a 26.

MATT: Jesus, all right. Go ahead and roll a d8 and add your wisdom modifier.

LIAM: That is a 10.

MATT: Jester, you heal 10 points of damage.

SAM: Nice.

MATT: Strangely, the wounds on your body begin to just sew themselves shut, for reasons that you don't fully understand.

LIAM: Ooh, I'd hoped it'd have been more than that. And I think towards Molly. I say: Mollymauk-- as a bonus action-- I am begging you, hunger for control is insatiable. It will never be enough. Let it go.

MATT: Make a persuasion check.

TRAVIS: Boy.

LIAM: That is-- do the eyes factor into this?

MATT: No.

LIAM: 18.

MATT: 18. Lucien's voice retorts in your brain, and says, "He's gone. Let him go. Let it all go. Go, go, go, go." That finish your turn, Caleb?

LIAM: Yeah, I can't do anything, I'm stuck.

MATT: All right. Use another legendary action for Lucien to have Ira--

LIAM: Am I technically grappled?

MATT: No, you're technically restrained.

LIAM: Restrained.

MATT: Which is speed zero as well. It's kind of a worse form of grapple. Attacks against you have advantage, your attack rolls have disadvantage.

LIAM: I'm going to do something stupid that's probably not going to work, and do it anyway.

MATT: What are you going to do?

LIAM: I'm going to fire off the boots, and see if it'll blow me out of this hole I'm in.

MATT: Okay. Roll a d20.

LIAM: Okay. Meh, it's five. (fire roaring) (laughter) (fire sputtering out)

LIAM: Cool, that's my turn.

MATT: There you go. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Is that burning? (laughter)

MATT: You smell something burning.

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: All right, end your turn?

LAURA: Veth's corpse is on fire already.

SAM: (shrieks) (laughter)

TRAVIS: The Ira movement, is this your third in this round, or second?

MATT: This is the second.

TRAVIS: Okay.

MATT: Ira is going to go ahead, and glance towards the clouded sphere.

LAURA: Oh no.

MATT: That has been--

SAM: Don't fuck with my Marine Layer.

MATT: (hisses) Striking in the middle, and (explosion), and exploding in that space. I need you to make a dexterity saving throw.

MARISHA: Oh!

ASHLEY: Come on!

TRAVIS: I'm no good at those. Natural one.

LAURA: Oh no!

TALIESIN: It was a good plan.

TRAVIS: It's not a spell, so.

MATT: You take 30 points of fire damage.

TRAVIS: Oof, okay.

MATT: As the fire swarms around you. Is the Marine Layer concentration?

TRAVIS: It is not.

MATT: That's right.

TRAVIS: It's a Channel Divinity.

TALIESIN: I'm in a nightmare.

MATT: Indeed.

SAM: You're in a what? You're in a nightmare?

TRAVIS: Wild Mother's staying with me.

MATT: All righty.

TRAVIS: (high-pitched) Melora!

MATT: Caduceus, on your turn, the world is crumbling around you, you've had this vision before, you've had this nightmare before. The Wild Mother has warned you before of what would happen, should Lucien and the Somnovem complete their task. And here you are, standing in the middle of it. You failed, and your family is about to be eaten alongside you.

TALIESIN: No. I'm going to turn. I'll be back, it will be fine. And I'm going to run full speed, and jump into the pond, and head straight for the source of the spring.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: I'm getting out of here.

MATT: Go ahead and make a wisdom saving throw for me, please.

TALIESIN: That's not bad.

LAURA: This has been considering that I've been exercising this whole time.

TALIESIN: Nine, 20?

MATT: Minus the eyes you have?

TALIESIN: 17?

MATT: 17 will still do it.

TALIESIN: (sigh of relief)

MATT: As you dive into the pond, running, as you're in the air, you can see all the ground reaching out for you. You feel finger-like tethers and curling bits of skin trying to grab at you as you hit the cold water. And as you hit the water, you hit the bottom, but it's hard-ish and you open your eyes, and you're no longer in the pond. You are standing at the base of Lucien, and you're back in the battlefield.

TALIESIN: Do I still have--?

MATT: You have your movement, but that was your action.

TALIESIN: And a bonus action.

MATT: And your bonus action, yes.

TALIESIN: I'm-- how far am I? Oh god, I see Veth. Yes, I see Veth.

MATT: You do not see Veth, actually.

TALIESIN: I do not see Veth.

MATT: Veth is currently hidden.

TALIESIN: I am going to try and get away from--

MATT: Going this way?

TALIESIN: Yeah, I'm going to head north, towards you.

MATT: Towards me?

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: Okay. As soon as you reach the 10-foot radius, he's going to use a reaction, which would give you an opportunity attack.

TALIESIN: All right.

MATT: Natural 20.

SAM: Oh.

TALIESIN: Reaction cancel?

MATT: You can that, yeah, there you go. So with that, you do still take 19 points of slashing damage. And I dropped the dice.

TALIESIN: Ow.

MATT: I need you to make a check to see if you maintain your--

TALIESIN: What am I shooting for?

MATT: It's 10, DC of 10.

TALIESIN: Oh, I ought to succeed. Yeah, it's fine.

MATT: Okay. All right, so that's your action and you move back.

TALIESIN: I was going to continue running. I was actually going to head towards the center of--

MATT: Here?

TALIESIN: I'm going to try and get cover back there.

MATT: That's as far as you can get as moving back, and actually, if you moved at an angle this way, you can get about there. That's good as you can get.

TALIESIN: So what do I see now?

MATT: You see Veth on the ground, unconscious.

TALIESIN: How far?

MATT: Right now, about 30-ish, 35 feet from you.

TALIESIN: Um. Let's just toss a-- fuck. Okay, yeah, because-- yeah. I'm going to throw a bonus action Healing Word.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: So that's level one, sorry, should be--

SAM: What song do you sing?

LAURA: (laughter)

TALIESIN: ♪ Do, do, do, do ♪ I don't know, I got nothing. (laughter)

MARISHA: (sings opening tune "Take On Me" by a-ha)

TALIESIN: That is level one, so that's nine hit points.

MATT: All right, so you heal nine hit points.

SAM: Hey, look at that, see? We're winning again.

TALIESIN: And I also still have the circle around me, so I'm just going to sit there. And technically, I think Lucien's still in the circle, maybe. Nope, nope, no, they're not.

MATT: Nope, not at that point.

TALIESIN: Nope, that's cool.

MATT: All right, that finish your turn?

TALIESIN: (grunts)

MATT: End of your turn, he's going to use legendary action to use one of the gazes. Ira is going to glance down angrily at the center space. (hissing) As another blast--

TALIESIN: Oh, come on.

MATT: -- of angry fire explodes. That Veth--

SAM: I think I'm okay!

MARISHA: (laughs)

MATT: Veth and Caduceus, I need you both to make dexterity saving throws.

MARISHA: Oh my god.

TALIESIN: Dexterity save?

MATT: Correct.

SAM: 24.

MATT: That's a success.

TALIESIN: No.

SAM: But--

LIAM: Are you up?

MATT: Minus your eyes.

SAM: Caduceus was up.

LIAM: Just up.

SAM: He just healed me.

MATT: So it was a 24?

SAM: 24.

MATT: Okay, that's a success. Which, you have evasion, right?

SAM: I do have evasion.

MATT: So you take zero damage, nice.

TRAVIS: How many hit points are you?

MATT: Caduceus?

TALIESIN: No.

SAM: Mighty nine.

MATT: No, okay.

TALIESIN: Oh no, no.

SAM: I'm good.

LIAM: Fractal! Fractals.

TALIESIN: Stop that, god.

MATT: Sorry, 28 points of fire damage to you.

LAURA: (laughs) You're so intense when you ask. "You had eight!"

MATT: Okay. Finishing Caduceus' turn. Jester, you're up. Fjord, you're on deck.

LAURA: Oh god, I'm up?

MATT: Yes, you are.

TALIESIN: Half of 28 is--

LAURA: Okay.

TALIESIN: Four, yay.

LAURA: I'm going to-- This is a big ask, this is a big hope, I'm reaching far. I'm going to look over at Sprinkle. I'm going to try to Channel Divinity.

LIAM: Yes.

LAURA: Divine Intervention.

MATT: Divine Intervention?

LAURA: I'm going to try to do Divine Intervention.

MATT: Go for it. Go for it, and roll it. See if you can get 15% or below on a hundred percentile dice.

SAM: Our fate lies with a ferret.

LIAM: Prayer circle.

LAURA: He's a weasel.

LIAM: For the mammal.

LAURA: I'm going to roll the--

MATT: What are you asking for this Divine Intervention?

LAURA: Oh god, this could work. I've got a chance. The second die has just got to be five or lower. Oh my god. (laughs) I'm going to cry. Please. Oh no, it's a seven!

MATT and MARISHA: No!

LIAM: You got a 17?

SAM: But wait, because of the eyes, it reduces down?

MARISHA: Yeah!

MATT: No.

LAURA: Because he's right here, I get advantage because he can hear me directly.

MATT: Unfortunately, no, Jester.

LIAM: The ferret was so close.

SAM: Dang it.

ASHLEY: (groans)

MATT: That was so close.

MATT and LIAM: (groaning)

MATT: As you look over towards Sprinkle--

LAURA: My heart is pounding.

MATT: I know, and try and reach out to Artagan, to the Traveler, as you begin to expand your consciousness into prayer, you feel the will of the Somnovem, the remaining Somnovem, tense to close off that connection momentarily.

LIAM: It was worth a try.

LAURA: Oh god, so close, so close.

TALIESIN: Worth a try.

LIAM: Maybe you should crawl into that nipple hole for the rest of your turn.

LAURA: I know, I was thinking about it. Okay. I didn't do a healing, because I was hoping for that. I'm going to-- Where are the eyes?

MATT: There and there.

LIAM: And on that other building too, yeah?

MATT: Oh yeah, sorry, three. There's three of them there. Bop-bop-bop.

LAURA: Okay.

TALIESIN: We are in the kill box.

LAURA: Yeah. I'm going to use my movement to, if I can get to it, move over behind the archway thingy over here and hide.

MATT: Are you grappled?

LAURA: I am grappled.

MATT: Yeah.

LAURA: Okay. Cool, I'm going to take a healing potion.

MATT: Sure, go for it.

LAURA: That sounds nice. Cool.

MATT: All right. Is that the end of your turn, Jester?

LAURA: Yeah. I can't try to un-grapple, right?

MATT: It's an action to try and un-grapple, unfortunately.

LAURA: Cool.

MATT: All right, finishing Jester's turn, he's going to use a legendary action to Fold Space. Lucien--

MARISHA: Son of a bitch.

TRAVIS: That's the third one, right?

LAURA: God, it was so close.

MARISHA: So.

SAM: No.

MATT: I know, I know, I was rooting for you. As soon as you take that potion, you feel this shadow loom over you, and both Yasha and Jester are now standing at the base shadow of Lucien. All right, finishing Jester's turn. Fjord, you're up.

TRAVIS: Fuck that. You had to do that, didn't you? Okay, okay. How many legendary actions have you used, three?

MATT: Four at this point.

TRAVIS: Four. With my bonus action, I'll call out to Mollymauk and say: You know, I really wanted to have another chance at the fruit salad! You want to come back and hang out? (laughter)

LAURA: How's that for persuasion? (laughter)

TRAVIS: Listen, the fruit salad was between Molly and Fjord, okay? It's code, it's code, yeah.

SAM: It's a special moment.

TRAVIS: It's a mixed fruit salad.

MATT: Roll a persuasion check.

TRAVIS: Mixed fruit?

MATT: I'm on the cusp of giving you disadvantage for that one. (laughter)

TALIESIN: I'm on the cusp of agreeing. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Plus five, 21 minus one, so 20?

MATT: There's no minus for the eyes.

TRAVIS: Oh, okay.

MATT: For the persuasion.

TRAVIS: 21.

MATT: 21 is not enough, unfortunately.

TRAVIS: Okay.

MATT: With each success, the DC gets higher and higher.

TRAVIS: Makes sense, makes sense.

MATT: You are just below the current threshold, or a little below the current threshold.

LAURA: 23 would be the current threshold now.

MATT: So you shout out from the foggy space, and it does not seem to find purchase on its intended target.

TRAVIS: Boy. So Jester is right here, and Yasha's just on the other side of it?

MATT: Yep, flying about 10 feet in the air. (wings flapping)

TRAVIS: Okay, can you-- (laughs) ♪ Can you ♪ I can do it, I can count. Veth is right here, right?

MATT: Correct.

TRAVIS: Five, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30.

MARISHA: Oh my god.

TRAVIS: Sure. I am going to cast--

MATT: Uh-huh?

TRAVIS: Arcane Gate from where I am.

MATT: Oh, shit.

TRAVIS: My only 6th-level spell.

SAM: Whoa.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: And I'm going to stick it right there, which is exactly 35 feet from Veth.

MATT: I'll say about there.

TRAVIS: Mm-hmm.

MATT: And you're sticking it here?

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: That's my movement.

SAM: Okay.

MATT: And 30 feet, I'll do it 30 feet, so I'll move it five feet closer to Veth.

MATT: Five, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30 is where it would be.

TRAVIS: Perfect. It appears, and I will, yeah, because they'll see me come out of it, and they've seen this spell, so I'm hoping they'll put two and two together that the portal is going to appear towards Veth, invisible to Lucien and everybody else behind it. And I will, in my Marine Layer, walk towards Veth.

MATT: Okay. How many feet will you go?

TRAVIS: The full 30.

MATT: That will get you right next to Veth, and enshroud this whole space.

TRAVIS: Anybody within five feet of me can see as if it's clear, but they are entirely obscured.

MATT: Correct.

TRAVIS: And I will send-- Which one's throwing fucking fireballs? This one?

MATT: Ira.

TRAVIS: Yeah, I'll send all three Eldr-- no. The Arcane Gate was my spell.

MATT: The Arcane Gate was your action.

TRAVIS: So that's it.

MATT: That's it.

TRAVIS: I'm buffing you. And that's my turn.

MATT: All right. Finishing your turn. He's going to use this last legendary action to go ahead and-- Let's gaze one more time. Ira is going to angrily send another fiery explosion, (explosion) out onto Beau, Jester, and Yasha. I need you all to make another dexterity saving throw, minus the number of eyes you have.

ASHLEY: Okay, okay, okay.

LAURA: 19.

MATT: 19, success, so you take-- It would have been 28, to 14 points of fire damage.

TRAVIS: You dropped one, you lost it.

MATT: I did. Eh, I'll deal with it later. Oh, there it is. All right. Yasha?

ASHLEY: Natural 20, which brings me to 23.

MATT: 14 points of fire damage.

SAM: Nice.

TRAVIS: Where are you?

MATT: Beauregard.

MARISHA: Rolled a four, so evasion.

MATT: So you take half damage still, so you take 14 points--

MARISHA: I'm sorry, I rolled an eight, but bringing it down to four, so half damage.

MATT: Right, you got it.

MARISHA: How many points?

MATT: 14 points of fire damage. All right. Back at the top, Beau, you're up.

MARISHA: Okay, okay, okay, okay.

LAURA: I've got the Ring of Fire Resistance!

TRAVIS: You do!

MATT: You do, yeah.

MARISHA: Take it back!

LAURA: That's two turns that I've--

MARISHA: Take it back!

LAURA: Well, that would have been plus seven that I wouldn't get on this one.

MATT: Correct. And then the last time you took damage--

LAURA: I did, but I don't remember how-- I think it was 18 points. Yeah, no, it was 19?

MATT: It was 19 because it was 38 for the total number.

LAURA: So I would get--

TRAVIS: Eight points.

LAURA: Eight points back, or nine points?

TRAVIS: Nine points, yeah.

MATT: Correct.

LAURA: That's good, that's good.

MATT: That's good.

SAM: That ring is valuable.

ASHLEY: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

TRAVIS: Five Gs.

LIAM: There it is. (laughter)

LIAM: Longest long con on that ring.

SAM: A thousand gold per health point.

TRAVIS: It's pretty close.

MATT: All righty. Beau, what are you doing?

MARISHA: I speak in Lucien's mind, and I say--

SAM: Remember the fruit salad? (laughter)

MARISHA: I say-- (laughter) Fuck you, Sam, no, I'm trying to concentrate. I say, remember the story of Mona and Yuli, the two serpent sisters, who climbed their way to the surface? And I smash into my fists, because I'm still grappled, right?

MATT: Currently, yeah.

MARISHA: I smash my fists into the ground, and I look up at the two eyes that are stationed on top of the towers. And I imagine, and I summon two snake-like heads that emerge and climb up to the top of the tower, and come down and bite their heads off, their eyeball heads off.

MATT: Both of them at the same time? All right.

MARISHA: I'll do one! I'll do one, at that one, the fireball one.

MATT: Okay. All right, go ahead.

MARISHA: To-- (shattering sound)

MATT: Go ahead and make d20 roll with your-- add your wisdom modifier and the number of eyes you have.

MARISHA: This is just, I don't have advantage.

MATT: No, the specific lair action allows advantage. It is not happening.

MARISHA: Okay. Come on! Come on! Okay! Okay! God, I'm shaking. Ah, ooh! Ah, plus my eyes. (exhales) 30!

MATT: 30?

MARISHA: 30.

MATT: 30. You watch us out of the middle of the air, this somewhat smoky, immaterial thing begins to take form into this massive cobra head that (gasp, impact sound) bites downward. Go ahead and make an attack roll for me, adding your wisdom modifier.

MARISHA: Just a regular d8? Just my regular attack roll?

MATT: Well, I mean, just roll a d20, and add your wisdom modifier.

MARISHA: Okay. Cocked. 14, 15.

MATT: 15, okay, so it won't take full damage, but it does get hit, so go ahead and roll 2d8 for me, if you don't mind.

MARISHA: Come on.

LAURA: What is what?

LIAM: There's an eye on the left. Does that looked damaged?

MARISHA: Okay, okay!

LAURA: It's so hot in here!

MARISHA: 2d8 plus anything else?

MATT: No, just 2d8.

MARISHA: Oh, yucky. 11.

MATT: 11 points of damage to the Ira eye as the snake bites down, and scatters. It's not nothing.

MARISHA: Can I attempt to break from this grapple?

MATT: That would be your action to do so.

MARISHA: All right, Patient Defense.

MATT: Okay, (whooshes) you go into a dodge stance. Finishing Beau's go, it is Essek's turn. Essek steps forward while still slowed, just goes, "Caleb, they need you. (groans)" And takes your arm and is going to try, and pull you out.

LIAM: Oh, buddy.

MATT: That is-- doesn't have a high strength, that's a failure. He's going to go ahead and use his Fortune's Favor.

LAURA: That's right, he gave us a Fortune's Favor, too. (gasps)

MATT: To try and-- yeah, don't forget that-- to try and reroll. 17. He pulls you free.

LIAM: Oh shit!

MATT: (grunts) From underneath the building. It hurts your legs, but he drags you back to your feet, and goes, "(pants) Let's finish this."

LIAM: Press my forehead to his forehead, and then turn back towards all the shit that's happening around us.

MATT: All right, and you are no longer restrained. You're still on the ground, for the most part. You still have to use your movement to get up, but you're no longer restrained. He's going to go ahead and save to see if he's still slowed. He succeeds, he's no longer slowed. But that's where he is. All right. Finishing Essek's turn, it is Lucien's go. Lucien is going to go into his multi-attack of clawed wings to you, Jester.

LIAM: Mother--

MARISHA: No.

LIAM: -- fucker.

MARISHA: Do me, he's got disadvantage.

MATT: Too far away, and he's going for the one that seems the most viable. So, first attack. Natural 20.

TALIESIN: Am I 30--

MATT: No, you're too far.

TALIESIN: I'm too far.

MATT: Second attack is a 32. Third attack.

LAURA: I don't think he'll need that many.

MATT: 17?

LAURA: Doesn't hit.

MATT: All right.

LIAM: Where's Cad?

MATT: Fourth attack.

LAURA: Oh, right, I could go, ow, ow, ow.

MATT: That's a 30.

LIAM: Caduc.

LAURA: Okay, that, yeah.

LIAM: Caduc, where are you?

MATT: Fifth attack, natural 20.

TALIESIN: I'm behind the orange fire.

MATT: And the last attack. Yeah, so five hits on you, two of which are natural 20s.

MARISHA: Oh!

SAM: To Jester?

MATT: Yeah.

LAURA: Yeah, I'm probably deaddy-dead-dead.

MARISHA: Oh no.

MATT: We'll see.

LAURA: Okay.

SAM: It would have to be--

LAURA: First hit, Hellish Rebuke.

MATT: Respect.

TALIESIN: (clapping)

MATT: That is 20 points of slashing damage. Oh, actually, no, sorry. That would be the first crit, which would be--

LAURA: 40.

MATT: Well, it's not 40, because it's eight from that, so it'd be 20 minus eight, it's 12, 24, 32 points of slashing damage on the first hit.

LAURA: Oh, so I don't get to do Hellish Rebuke because I'm already unconscious.

MATT: Ah, sorry. Then we'll say the second hit is an auto-crit, which takes you to--

SAM: Oh no.

MARISHA: That's it.

MATT: Yeah, so--

LAURA: I'm dead.

MATT: So the first three hits, Jester is slain. You watch as the wings slash downward and impale Jester. She screams out as it lifts, and throws her to the ground with a (thumping). The remaining attacks which would've gone against you, now go to you. There was a natural 20, which would have hit you, and then the last roll was a natural 19, so you take the last two hits on this one.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: That would be, 12, 24, 32 points again, 32 points of slashing damage, reduced to half, 16 because you're raging. And then the last one would be 16 reduced, so eight points of slashing damage to you. As the wings just go into this frenzy, impaling Jester and throwing her lifeless body to the ground, the other one just hacking into Yasha, and you just hear this laughter. As the flesh in the ground begins to slowly curl over the body of Jester. All right. That's going to end Lucien's turn. Yasha, you're up.

SAM: Woof.

ASHLEY: Woof. Okay. Okay.

LAURA: Right before I die, I'm going to go: Arty! (gasps)

SAM: (as Sprinkle) Why couldn't I have died first?

LAURA: (laughs)

SAM: (as Sprinkle) That's what I want.

TRAVIS: (as Sprinkle) I'm right here!

MARISHA: Come on, come on, get it together.

ASHLEY: Oh, fucking get it together. Okay. I see this, and I'm going to turn around and start taking some attacks on Lucien.

MATT: Go for it.

ASHLEY: Goddamn it. 17.

MATT: 17 misses.

ASHLEY: 24.

MATT: 24 hits. Don't forget you can go reckless attacks, too, for future rounds if you'd like.

ASHLEY: Thank you.

MATT: I know it's a lot going on right now.

ASHLEY: Yeah. Okay. Savage Attacker. Okay. 35 plus 15 extra points of radiant damage.

MATT: 50 points of damage in one strike. Yeah.

MATT: He's looking hurt.

TRAVIS: Lucien is?

MATT: Lucien's looking hurt. As Yasha angrily spins, the first swing going wide, the second time you take and slam it forward and it sinks to the hilt inside the fleshy midsection of where Lucien meets the rest of this convulsing, Somnovem torso. So that's your action.

ASHLEY: I don't think I can do anything else. Fuck. Oh god. Oh my god, this is so fucking stressful. I am just going to float down and try to just stand over Jester and try to hold on to her.

MATT: You got it.

ASHLEY: So that she doesn't get--

MATT: You're standing sentinel over here. Okay. That finishes Yasha's turn. At the end of Yasha's turn, Lucien's going to go ahead and use a legendary action.

TRAVIS: First one of the round.

MATT: To go ahead and--

ASHLEY: I don't have any tissues. I've socks here.

LAURA: (laughs)

MATT: Aww.

TRAVIS: They're good for that, too.

SAM: The Vox Machina socks?

MARISHA: The socks?

TRAVIS: Critrole.com/store.

SAM: store.critrole.com.

MATT: He's going to have Ira blast downward into this space once more, the center of the cloud. I need Caduceus, Fjord and Veth to make dexterity saving throws.

TALIESIN: He can get all of us in one shot?

MATT: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Oh yeah.

TALIESIN: Dex save?

MATT: Dex save, yeah, all three of you.

SAM: Does he have to guess where we are?

MATT: He saw where you were. He doesn't know about Fjord, he just knows where you are and where he is and he's trying to hit both of you and Fjord just happens to be in the radius.

TALIESIN: Yeah, see where was that?

MATT: That's a shitty roll.

SAM: Not good.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: 17.

MATT: 17? That would be a success.

TRAVIS: Oh!

MATT: Barely, barely on that one.

TRAVIS: Plus one, minus one.

MATT: I lied, you missed it by one. Sorry.

TRAVIS: It's fair.

MATT: Sorry, 31 points of fire damage to you.

TRAVIS: Okay.

TALIESIN: Fuck.

MATT: Veth?

SAM: I rolled an 18.

MATT: You rolled an 18?

SAM: Yes.

MATT: Total?

SAM: Total.

MATT: Yeah, 18 makes it.

SAM: But is evasion a reaction?

MATT: No, evasion--

SAM: Just happens?

MATT: -- just happens for you. It's your uncanny dodge.

SAM: So I take no points?

MATT: You take no damage.

SAM: Fuck. (laughter)

MATT: Rogue's survivability, man.

SAM: Okay.

LIAM: That's how I survived the Raishan fight.

MATT: Yeah. Caduceus?

TALIESIN: After subtracting eyes, I roll a zero.

MATT: 31 points of fire damage to you.

TALIESIN: 31?

LIAM: Are you up?

TALIESIN: I'm up-ish.

SAM: Okay. We need you to be up.

MARISHA: You cannot go down.

TALIESIN: I'm aware. I'm up-ish.

TRAVIS: Where are you on the map?

TALIESIN: I'm the orange glow.

TRAVIS: Yep, yep, yep.

MATT: I need you to make a concentration check to see if you can maintain your Spirit Guardians.

TALIESIN: Okay. Honestly, at this point, I barely care.

TRAVIS: Boy.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: You're fine?

TALIESIN: How much would it be? I should double check. I rolled a 24.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: So that's fine.

MATT: You're fine. All right, lair actions come in. The Pattern Revealed. Once again, the battlefield begins to shimmy and shake and flash with the various shapes and symbols of the Cognouza's pattern. I need everybody who's conscious to make a wisdom saving throw, please.

SAM: Wisdom saving throw. We have advantage!

MARISHA: Advantage.

MATT: You do.

LIAM: Does Mind Blank protect me from this?

MATT: It does.

MARISHA: Wowzers.

TRAVIS: Natural fucking 20.

MATT: Hell yeah.

MARISHA: Had a natural one in there, so thank god.

SAM: I had a natural one in there as well. Are we subtracting eyes?

MATT: Yes.

SAM: 21.

TRAVIS: 23.

MATT: 21, all right, good.

ASHLEY: 12.

MATT: 12, you gain your first eye.

ASHLEY: Okay.

TALIESIN: 16.

MATT: You gain an eye.

TALIESIN: Fuck.

MARISHA: 20.

MATT: 20, you're fine. However, the air begins to crackle once more--

TALIESIN: Hey!

MATT: -- with that energy manifestation.

MARISHA: Oh! Oh.

SAM: What's that?

MATT: Okay. Veth, you're up.

LAURA: I feel like we do more damage though in actual hits.

MARISHA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Some of us. You got to have the stats for that shit.

SAM: All right, from my favorite, favored terrain, Marine Layer, I'm going to take aim to the fireball.

MATT: You're still on the ground, by the way.

SAM: Oh, I will-- Do I get any penalty from shooting from the ground?

MATT: No. It's a half movement to stand up.

SAM: I'll stand up.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: I will quickly reverse fart, out of fear. (laughter) And then I will take aim and fire at the fireball eye.

MATT: Ira? Go for it. Go ahead and roll an attack.

SAM: Ira, you're going down. With advantage because I'm hidden.

MATT: You are.

MARISHA: Come on.

SAM: 30.

MATT: That hits, go ahead and roll damage.

SAM: Okay. Fuck.

TRAVIS: What?

SAM: I meant to say-- It's fine.

MATT: Your bolt, your Brenatto's Bolt?

SAM: Yeah.

MATT: I'll allow it, it's fine.

SAM: All right. Okay. Thank you, Matt. Okay.

MATT: You caught it before you rolled damage, so.

SAM: These are really good rolls.

MARISHA: Kill it, kill it!

SAM: Six times five is 30, 40, 47, plus another 10, 57.

TRAVIS: Yes, okay.

MATT: As the bolt shoots out of the clouded mass, the Marine Layer, it strikes the center of the eye and as the eye begins to withdraw, it shakes and then just bursts, with the bolt's voltaic energy from the inside. The stalk slumps over the side of the building. No longer there.

SAM: I don't have enough movement to get to--

TRAVIS: You have one more shot?

SAM: I don't have any more shots, unfortunately. Because that, I charge it up with the bonus action. And even if I did, it would only be a small hit. So I think it's safer for me to get away from you, Mr. Fjord.

TRAVIS: Go.

SAM: And dash into the rubble of the tower if I can get in there.

MATT: Well, not dash, because you used your action--

SAM: Not dash, but use my 15 feet of movement.

MATT: It is--

SAM: To get in there or behind?

MATT: You can get in there, you but can only get in about 10 feet in there because it's considered difficult terrain, so you're like-- but you scramble into the rubble of the tower, so you're heavily obscured and then also within the cloud.

SAM: Great.

MATT: There you go. That finish your turn, Veth?

SAM: Yep.

MATT: End of your turn. Ira can't be used.

SAM: I take a big swig from my flask as well.

MARISHA: Oh, we're reverting?

LIAM: Seems right, seems right.

SAM: Yeah. It's rosé now. So it's a little less impactful.

MARISHA: Just makes you a little bloated?

SAM: Yeah.

MATT: Lucien's going to Fold Space.

ASHLEY: Do I get anything, attack of anything?

MATT: No, because he teleports.

LIAM: Goddamn it.

MATT: There we go.

TRAVIS: Is that right on you two lads?

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: There you go. All right, that finishes Veth's go. Now it's eyes' turn. Let's see which three come back. One can't come back. Three can't come back. There we go. Fastidan returns to the field.

LIAM: Motherfucker.

MARISHA: He's the Blight motherfucker.

LAURA: Yeah, that's the bad one.

MATT: That one. Culpasi replaces Mirumus. And then--

LAURA: Did it seem like Lucien was still affected by the eyes being killed?

MATT: Yes. He took an additional-- actually, I already marked it.

TRAVIS: So Culpasi and--

MATT: Elatis.

TRAVIS: -- Elatis are out.

MATT: It's going to appear over here. Elatis is going to go ahead and target you, Beauregard. I need you to make an intelligence saving throw for me, please.

MARISHA: Yeah, okay.

MATT: Minus the number of eyes you have.

LAURA: I made too many jokes about how I was going to be the first one to die.

SAM: You're not going to die. Caduceus is going to somehow be able to run 60 feet in a turn and get to you.

MARISHA: 19.

MATT: Minus the eyes?

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: That's a success. So you feel the billowing growth of excitement within your belly begin to swell as you suddenly can't see Yasha where she's standing, but instead see her with her arms extended in the direction of Lucien, asking for you to come help. And you close your eyes, knowing that it's entirely false, and as you do, you will it away and you see her back where she was originally. You do gain another eye.

MARISHA: Hmm. Hmm. Hmm, hmm, hmm.

LAURA: That's five for you both?

MARISHA: Five eyes.

SAM: Good god, what happens at nine?

MARISHA: I don't know, I don't want to know.

LAURA: You become Lucien.

LIAM: I'm at the top of the building fragment on the ground, right? I'm at Lucien's toes, balls.

TRAVIS: You're like kind of in here?

LIAM: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Okay.

MATT: Culpasi is going to go ahead and target, can't target you because you have the protection still around you.

LIAM: Does it know that?

MATT: So instead it's going to use its action to try and break through. It's going to try and make a charisma saving throw is it, right?

LIAM: Yeah, 15.

MATT: 15? Failure. Does not break through your protection.

LAURA: That thing's eaten a lot of attacks, that's good.

MATT: Fastidan is going to go ahead and target-- It's going to ahead and target you, Caduceus. I need you to make a constitution saving throw.

TALIESIN: This is not going to go well.

MARISHA: Where are you?

LIAM: Goddamn it!

TALIESIN: Under 20.

LAURA: Oh god.

TALIESIN: Yep.

ASHLEY: Fuck.

TALIESIN: Minus-- fuck, yeah, seven. I've been rolling like shit all night. Anyone got a potion?

MATT: You take 46 points of necrotic damage.

LIAM: Oh fuck!

MATT: Did you have Death Ward on from earlier still?

TALIESIN: Wait, yeah, I never-- Oh shit, there was still the Death Ward up.

MATT: So you drop to zero and are back to one hit point.

TALIESIN: Fuck, balls!

MARISHA: Fucking heal yourself, fucking heal--

MATT: But Death Ward is gone.

TALIESIN: Death Ward is gone.

MATT: As you watch Caduceus, just suddenly, we're talking Eye of Sauron to Frodo in the middle of Mordor just like hit from behind by this green light and crumble before this strange growth of green vines swirl up and encase him for a moment and absorb the rest of the blow. They turn black and curl away, and left standing still up and breathing, barely, is Caduceus, given grace by the Wild Mother. All right. That's all of their turn. That brings us back to Caleb with Caduceus on deck.

LIAM: Okay. I-- Grasping Essek's forearm, I pull myself to standing and I can see, from my vantage point, Jester's corpse. I scream her name and I reach out my hand I will her to leave that space and appear next to Caduceus wherever he is.

MATT: Okay, go ahead and make a d20 check, add your wisdom modifier and the number of eyes you have.

LIAM: 25.

MATT: 25.

SAM: Damn.

MATT: As you concentrate, you watch as her body begins to lift off the ground, telekinetically, her arms dropping limp beneath it as you carry her at an arc. Now, you cannot see where Caduceus is.

LIAM: I was imaging her just disapparating and just going (whoosh) next to him.

MATT: Right.

LIAM: As you will.

MATT: You rolled pretty high. I'll say you don't get it quite to her, because you cannot see where Caduceus is. You just guess it, but she does appear, you assume somewhere nearby. Caduceus, you do see her appear on the ground around the corner from you.

LIAM: And I just scream in my mind at Lucien: You're killing her, you're killing her, you love her, you're killing her! As a bonus action.

MATT: Okay, go ahead and make a persuasion check.

LIAM: 25.

MATT: He loses another legendary action.

MARISHA: Hey!

TRAVIS: How many is that for the round, three?

MATT: Yeah, and as he's standing there, looking down at you and you say this, glancing up at eyes, with a big twisted grin, you can see the sides of the mouth are extending and cracking the cheeks as the elongated teeth begin to pull through, the more monstrous he becomes as this transmutation into the city, and then one of the hands reaches up and claws across his own face, leaving streaks of blood. (spits) All right.

LIAM: That's it.

TRAVIS: Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck.

MATT: End of your turn?

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: Going to use a legendary action. And Fastidan is going to point to you.

TRAVIS: That's four.

MATT: Fastidan had not previously made--

LIAM: Fastidan had succeeded on breaking through.

MATT: That's right, you're correct. So I need you to make a constitution saving throw.

LIAM: I'm going to use my Fortune's Favor.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: It's 11.

MATT: 11, that's a failure.

TALIESIN: Fuck.

LIAM: Unless the eyes lower it, in which case it would be--

MATT: The eyes do lower it.

LIAM: So seven.

MATT: Take 41 points of necrotic damage.

LIAM: 41?

MATT: Yes.

LAURA: Are you still up?

LIAM: Yes.

MATT: The mournful, vengeful, angry growl of Lucien signals the vengeful eye, disgust and hatred of Fastidan upon you, and you feel that withering sensation in your body. The blood seems to chill, your vision seems to go dark, the tunnel vision fades right before you pass out and you catch yourself back, still on your feet. All right, that finishes Caleb's go. Caduceus, you're up.

TALIESIN: Where is that?

MATT: You're lucky you drew his ire with that.

TALIESIN: I was about to say, what is the spell I'm looking for is-- Motherfucker, come on. Sorry, I'm having just a mild panic attack.

TRAVIS: No, no, Let's slow it down. Let's slow it down, no rush. Take your time.

LIAM: Record scratch. You're probably wondering how I got here.

TRAVIS: This turn brought to you by--

SAM: Dwarven Forge. Look, we know Dwarven Forge is awesome.

TALIESIN: Freaking out and I'm losing--

SAM: If you want to help make your games awesome, go to dwarvenforge.com. Makers of premium hand-crafted gaming terrain.

TRAVIS: Yeah, man.

TALIESIN: Revivify, right? Yeah, Revivify. So I'm going to burn a 4th-level. So I'm going to, seeing Jester on the ground, I'm going to take a run at Jester and I got a diamond in hand already and I'm just going to take my action to just shock her back to life.

MATT: Okay. [terrain clattering]

ALL: Whoa!

TALIESIN: And with my imagination I send the entire city crumbling down!

LIAM: That's just right.

TALIESIN: (yelling)

MATT: That's all good. Salvage that shit.

TALIESIN: I'm going to keep moving.

MATT: That's hilarious. My bad.

TRAVIS: Whew.

MATT: We'll say that's there.

TRAVIS: My heart jumped so hard.

MATT: So sorry.

LIAM: Yep, yep, yep.

MATT: So sorry, that totally--

LIAM: Woo!

SAM: Dwarven Forge!

MATT: Knocked it forward. Anyway. (laughter)

LAURA: Easy to set back up.

SAM: Easy to set back up, easy to knock down.

MATT: We are good, we are good. Excuse me. I need you to go ahead and roll a d20. This would be-- just add your wisdom modifier.

TALIESIN: Wisdom modifier, cool. 14?

MATT: 14.

TALIESIN: (sighs)

MATT: As you reach down with the diamond in hand, clutching it, those same vines curl up your hand and crush the diamond into dust and as the dust falls from your hand, you reach down and touch Jester's bloody, cold form and those vines reach out and seem to glow against her body. The vines then curl black, and turn to ash. You stand up, wondering why it didn't seem to work. Until you hear her inhale.

ALL: (sighing)

LAURA: Fuck.

TRAVIS: Fucking Matthew!

LAURA: Why every time?! (groaning)

TRAVIS: We don't need any additional--

MATT: Time slows in these tense moments. (groaning)

SAM: (laughs)

MATT: Jester, you are flashed back into consciousness, looking up towards--

ASHLEY: I can't feel my fingers!

TRAVIS: ♪ I feel it in my toes! ♪

LIAM: Well played, Matthew Mercer, well played.

TRAVIS: ♪ Christmas is all around me ♪

LAURA: I have one hit point, I'm assuming?

MATT: You do. Both of you! Both the clerics do.

SAM: Yep. Wait.

LIAM: It's all good.

SAM: How many hit points do you have?

TALIESIN: One.

SAM: Oh, great!

LIAM: It's all good, man.

TALIESIN: Can I pick her up and drag her into the smoke? Or is that too far for me to go?

MATT: It's an action to cast the spell.

TALIESIN: My bonus action I don't want to burn yet.

MATT: I'll say I'll let you, but you're moving at half speed, so.

TALIESIN: Yeah, so. I'm going to use my bonus action to down a potion of healing.

MATT: Okay, go for it. So with that, you are both partially hidden within the--

TALIESIN: Lots happening.

MATT: -- fog cloud.

TRAVIS: You lost a couple of eyes that were on the roof, I think both of them took a tumble. They might be in between.

ASHLEY: No, they're not, they're done.

LAURA: One of them was dead already, wasn't it? Fastidan was on the high ground.

MATT: Fastidan was destroyed.

TRAVIS: Fastidan was destroyed?

MATT: And him. Wait, no, Fastidan wasn't destroyed.

LIAM: Fastidan fucked my shit up, it's all right.

MATT: Fastidan fell back this way, you're right, thank you.

LIAM: The fucker.

TRAVIS: I think it's Fastidan, Cul-- Col-pussy! And Elatis.

SAM: Colpussy.

MATT: Correct. Sorry, he must have got scattered somewhere. I'll find him. When it comes to it.

TALIESIN: Fuck.

MATT: We know he's there. We'll just say this is him for now. I'll use Ira for it. I'll deal with it. Anyway. Oh, there he is, he got flung into the middle of the field there. Poor guy. Sorry, that got really chaotic so fast.

TRAVIS: All the stalks are different. (laughs)

MATT: Yeah.

TRAVIS: I love it, I love it. This battle is nuts.

MATT: Okay. That finish your turn, Caduceus?

TALIESIN: I mean, yeah.

MATT: Okay, finishing Caduceus' turn, last legendary action. Fastidan does not have visual on either of the clerics or Fjord because of that Marine Layer. So instead, it's going to focus it on you, Caleb, since it can break through. Make another constitution saving throw for me.

LIAM: That is a 10.

MATT: 10. Good roll. Take 38 points necrotic damage.

SAM: (groans)

MATT: Caleb falls unconscious.

SAM: I'm pretty close to him, Matthew. Do I hear anything?

MATT: In the midst of this chaos, you hear (grunts) Caleb taking damage. You do not see him because you're currently hiding in the rubble of the building.

SAM: Sure, sure, sure.

MATT: Finishing Caduceus' turn. Jester, you're conscious with one hit point.

LAURA: I'm going to stand up and feel Caduceus in front of me.

TALIESIN: I think you saw us come in, so.

LAURA: Thank you, thank you. And I'm going to--

TRAVIS: Does that put them within five feet of me? Can they see, or are they 10 feet?

MATT and TALIESIN: No.

MATT: They're next to each other, so they can sense each other, but they're not--

TALIESIN: We know if we take a step out we can see.

TRAVIS: I got it, I got it.

MATT: Yeah, they're both right on the cusp.

TRAVIS: Got it, got it.

LAURA: I'm going to-- Okay. I'm going to use a 5th-level spell and cast Mass Care Wounds around me.

MATT: Okay, are they targets you have to see?

LAURA: No.

MATT: I think we went over this. What's the range?

LAURA: It's six within a 30-foot radius sphere that I choose.

TALIESIN: "See within range."

LAURA: No. "A wave of healing energy washes out from a point of your choice within range. Six creatures in a 30-foot radius--"

TALIESIN: Oh, you have a different spell.

LAURA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Okay, yeah, yeah.

LAURA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Mine's totally different.

LAURA: Can I cast the sphere above the tower and heal everything within 30 feet?

MATT: Yeah, I'd say you can do that. That would target you, Caduceus, Fjord, Veth, Caleb--

LAURA: Essek.

MATT: -- and Essek.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Yeah, you can totally do that.

LAURA: All right, then I'm going to do that.

MATT: Go ahead and roll for the heal.

SAM: Our clutch healer.

LAURA: (chuckles)

MATT: You're not wrong.

LAURA: 14 plus three is seven-- no, 14 plus three is 17 plus my spell ability modifier which is plus five. So what is that, 22?

MATT: 22.

LAURA: Points of healing to everyone.

MATT: 22 points of healing to--

SAM: Yeah.

MARISHA: That's huge.

LIAM: Yep.

SAM: That just won the game.

TALIESIN: That just woke up Caleb.

TRAVIS: You said 22 points of healing?

LIAM: Yeah, you just brought me back.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Correct.

LAURA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Oh my god.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: Don't forget your bonus action to talk to that motherfucker.

TRAVIS: He's used all five in this round. He has no more legendary actions.

MATT: Correct.

LAURA: Then I'm not going to talk to him because it always draws their attack after you try.

LIAM: Well, it's per round.

TALIESIN: We've had a rough day.

LAURA: We had a rough day.

MATT: So Jester, that's your action and you have half your movement still.

LAURA: I'm going to move-- did I hear Fjord when I healed? Did I hear anything?

MATT: You didn't make, I don't think, a physical--

TRAVIS: Ah!

MATT: (laughs)

LAURA: Nothing?

TRAVIS: Brr, oh baby!

MATT: Passive perception of 15, I'd say probably not.

LAURA: Okay. Then I'm just going to move further into the smoke to be more obscured.

MATT: Okay, and at that point you do step into range with Fjord and can see him there.

LAURA: My hands are shaking. I reach out and I just give him a hug.

TRAVIS: Uh-huh.

MATT: Okay, finishing Jester's turn, Fjord, you're up.

TRAVIS: I can see Fastidan.

MATT: You can, yes.

TRAVIS: I'll go one at a time, three Eldritch Blasts in his direction.

MATT: Go for it. He does have partial cover because he's on the roof, so he has a plus two to his AC.

TRAVIS: 15, plus 10, 20, 25.

MATT: That hits.

TRAVIS: Okay. 15 plus 10.

MATT: That hits.

TRAVIS: 19 plus 10, 29.

MATT: Yeah, all three hit. Go ahead and roll damage.

LIAM: Nice, Fjord.

TRAVIS: That's 11 points of force damage. Don't like this one. Second one. Man, I wish I had Hexblade's Curse. (laughs) 14 points of force damage, on the second one. Is he still there?

MATT: Still there.

TRAVIS: 14 points of force damage on the third one. Oh!

MARISHA: Yes!

ASHLEY: Yes!

MARISHA: (groans)

MATT: Is blasted and splattered across the roof.

TALIESIN: Lucien takes another chunk.

MATT: Indeed. With that, Lucien, who's standing currently above Essek and Caleb, seeing everyone heal shakes his hands like it's nothing and then (pained grunt, gasping) You see blood out of Lucien's mouth.

TRAVIS: One arm around Jester still, I'm going to use my movement to stay within her melee range and I'm just going to rotate towards the other set of footsteps I heard and see if I can get side-to-side with Caduceus.

MATT: Yeah, easy enough, a quick jaunt over there puts you and him, right in the center.

TALIESIN: At the moment, we can just use my disc because they're the same size and we're practically--

MATT: Practically, but for the effect, it's an easier reminder for me.

TRAVIS: I put hands on both of their shoulders: This is it. Let's do it.

TALIESIN: I'm so tired.

MATT: All right, finishing Fjord's turn, Beau, you're up.

MARISHA: Still that crackling energy in the air?

MATT: Yeah.

MARISHA: Okay. I'm going to think internally, I'm going to get to like a meditative state. I'm going to think about the connection of my feet to the ground and I'm going to say: I am not grappled. Then take my movement towards Lucien.

MATT: Okay, make a-- I should clarify at this point. The grapple has faded at this point.

SAM: You did it! You did it with the power of your mind!

MATT: Sorry.

TALIESIN: The power was inside you all along!

MARISHA: Yes! Yes!

TRAVIS: Your first round!

MATT: My apologies. The grapple lasts for that lair action, so when it switched to the previous lair action, now that it's back to your turn, you're no longer grappled. So you succeeded, didn't take any action. Now you're fine.

MARISHA: All right, so I'm great. Ah ha! Okay.

TRAVIS: The gate is there. The gate also goes to the other end of the field where there's another eyestalk. You got options. I think I can get 55 feet, I think I'm 55 feet from Lucien.

MATT: Want to try and get to him?

MARISHA: Five, 10, 15, yes. Come on, come on. Come on.

MATT: 45, 50, gets you right in the range.

MARISHA: 55, 55-ish.

MATT: 55, yeah. Yeah. You have just enough movement to get there.

LAURA: Whoa. Good eye.

MARISHA: And as I'm walking towards him, full 8:00am power walk in the mall walking towards him, I'm going to reach into the back of my belt and I'm going to pull out Mollymauk's belt from his coat that I keep on me, and I'm going to start wrapping it around my fists.

LIAM: Fucking baller.

MATT: Hell yeah.

MARISHA: And I'm just going to look at Lucien and I'm going to say: If I can't beat you out of him, I will beat you with him.

MATT: Hell yeah.

MARISHA: And I, using this imaginative power, focus all of this energy in towards this cloth from Mollymauk.

MATT: Okay. Let's do it.

MARISHA: And hope that maybe that does something cool and extra and punch him a lot now. Now I punch now. (exclaiming) Look at it, look at it!

TRAVIS: Say it, say it!

MARISHA: Look at it, it's two natural 20s! (cheering)

ASHLEY: What! (laughter)

MATT: Holy shit!

LIAM: Take pictures!

MATT: Take a picture, take a picture!

ASHLEY: Oh my god!

SAM: (screeching) Look at it!

MARISHA: (screeching) Look at it!

SAM: (screeching) Look at it! (laughter)

LAURA: It was the belt!

TRAVIS: What the fuck!

MARISHA: I'm dropping it for everyone to see!

LIAM: ♪ Here comes the general ♪

MARISHA: I'm dropping into our production Slack. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Okay.

MARISHA: The company deserves to see this! Okay.

ASHLEY: Oh my god.

SAM: Right now, somebody on Slack is like, "I thought I put this on office hours only! I am sleeping right now!"

MARISHA: Okay, roll for damage?

MATT: Yeah.

LIAM: Get it, girl.

LAURA: Get it, get it.

MARISHA: All right. Okay, I swear to god if you roll fucking ones on these dice. I'm going to do one at a time. First one. Okay, that's a seven, 14, plus another seven, 21 on the first attack.

MATT: All righty.

MARISHA: Come on, come on, give me an eight. Give me an eight. That's a two. So four plus seven. 11.

MATT: 11 points of damage, so that's 32 points of damage on your action. Pushing forward with the belt in fist, just whack, crack a second time, and as you're hitting it, you can see the stone where the flesh and stone meet cracking and the flesh is splitting and you're just punching more and more into the same wound.

MARISHA: And once again, I'm just going to try and use all of, you know, spare consciousness and look at Molly's belt as it's starting to soak through with blood and I'm just going to say: Long may he reign. And pop pop, Flurry of Blows. Is this doing anything cool, using my imagination? (laughter)

LIAM: It's a pretty sick moment.

MATT: It's a pretty cool moment.

MARISHA: It was a pretty sick moment.

TRAVIS: Walt Disney would be proud of you.

MARISHA: Okay, okay. Cool, yeah, 23, and that was a natural 19 for 31.

MATT: Yeah, both hit.

MARISHA: Fuck, all right. Okay. Yikes, seven and a one. So 14 damage for the first one, eight damage for the other.

MATT: Got it. So just continually punching, the blood's (spurting) out the sides, and you just hear the low growl of anger.

MARISHA: That's it, that's my turn.

MATT: Okay. Finishing Beau's turn, it is now Essek's turn. Essek sees you back to consciousness, he's going to turn around angrily, and-- Yeah, he's going to go ahead and unleash an 8th-level Gravity Fissure.

SAM: Yeah.

TRAVIS: 8th-level.

SAM: Yeah.

MATT: Was saving for something, but wants to get this over with, so Lucien's going to go ahead and have to make a constitution saving throw. Fails, but is going to go ahead and use Legendary Resistance to succeed, so that would be... 10d8. Force damage.

TRAVIS: Marisha.

LIAM: Cobalt Soul.

MARISHA: Cobalt Soul?

TRAVIS: No, in the thread.

MATT: 47. 47, so 23. 23 points of force damage to Lucien as Essek turns around and, (yells) Just yells, hands forward, and you see this one crackling blast of black gravity energy strike outward and pierce through Lucien, and as it strikes through, you watch as the gravity folds in, the arms of Lucien go, crushed inward, and all the muscles begin to tense. Parts of the various bits of protrusions, of tusk and bone, begin to crack and bend inward as he forces it off, but he took a solid bit of damage. Essek's going to go ahead and move back this way, now he can float, he's going to do so to try and get out of the way. Lucien will take an attack of opportunity.

TALIESIN: Does he still have one?

MATT: I don't think he's taken one since his last turn.

TALIESIN: Okay.

MATT: Since he's been teleporting around.

TALIESIN: Yeah, that's fair.

MATT: That will hit. 13 plus 10, 23 points of slashing damage to--

TRAVIS: My feet are jumping, what can I say? Just going to happen.

TALIESIN: I'm right there with you, digging a hole.

MATT: All right, ending his turn, it is now Lucien's turn.

TALIESIN: Yep.

LAURA: No.

MATT: Gets his Legendary Actions back.

MARISHA: Ooh boy, oh.

TRAVIS: My whole left leg is--

MATT: He's going to use Call Upon the Open Eyes.

LAURA: Oh yeah.

MATT: All creatures within 60 feet of Lucien must make a DC-- Well, a wisdom saving throw. As all of you feel the eyes on your bodies beginning to glow brightly, a will pushing into them and forcing you to move against your will.

TRAVIS: We have advantage, right?

MATT: On wisdom, you do.

LAURA: Yes, do we--

MATT: But minus the number of eyes you have.

TRAVIS: Goddamn, another fucking natural 20 and a one, that's amazing. That's 23.

MATT: 23, with the eyes you have?

TRAVIS: One eye.

MATT: Right, got you.

TRAVIS: And a natural 20, yeah.

MATT: That's a success.

LAURA: 25.

MATT: 25, success. You are not affected by it, because of your spell.

SAM: 21.

MATT: 21, success.

ASHLEY: 18.

MATT: 18 is just barely a success. Did you reduce your, by your eye?

ASHLEY: I did.

MATT: Yeah, that succeeds.

TALIESIN: 24.

MATT: Success.

MARISHA: 19.

MATT: Success, awesome.

LAURA: What about Essek? What about Essek?

MATT: Oh, yeah.

SAM: You looks like a cat lady right now.

MATT: Natural one.

LAURA: Oh no!

TRAVIS: Did he roll with advantage?

MATT: Oh, that's right. Essek makes it, succeeds on the second roll. (cheering)

SAM: We all made it?

MATT: Because of the meal, indeed.

MARISHA: No Cronenberg monsters today!

MATT: And for the other half, is going to do three clawed wing attacks. Those are going to be against you, Beauregard, since you're the, well-- No, Caleb's up. It's going to go after Caleb. You're the one who continues to resist his will, over and over and over again.

LIAM: You know what I haven't used up till this moment is the Mirror Image spell, so I'm going to use them all now.

MATT: Let's see. All right, so the first attack. This would be the time to do it. First attack is a 30 to hit.

LIAM: Now I roll to see if it hits me, though, right?

MATT: Correct.

LIAM: Does not, hits an illusion.

MATT: All right, so. No, this is a spell called--

MARISHA: Can I attack him now, Sentinel?

MATT: Correct, you can.

MARISHA: Yep, I'm going to take it.

MATT: So he goes to strike with one of the clawed wings and the images of you that are floating around end up--

MARISHA: Thank you, Travis.

MATT: Although-- I'm trying to see, do you drop spells when you go unconscious?

LIAM: It's not concentration.

MATT: Right, yeah. Then I'll say--

LIAM: I don't know.

MATT: Yeah.

LIAM: I also didn't use it for any of the negative energy because I didn't that that would apply.

MATT: That wouldn't, it's not an attack.

LIAM: Right.

MATT: No, I'd say it would still last on you since it is a spell that just lasts, and you were not killed, so yeah.

LIAM: All right.

MATT: All right, what did you roll?

MARISHA: 19.

MATT: 19 hits. Go ahead and roll damage. Oh, actually, no, 19 misses by one, sorry. My bad.

LIAM: The odds are in my favor.

MATT: Second attack against you. That is a 33 to hit.

LIAM: Doesn't hit.

MARISHA: Can I buy a ki point to do it again?

MATT: So you know the numbers, you lose a--

LIAM: Yep.

MATT: Yeah, all right.

LIAM: Gets harder each time.

MATT: That's going to be a 23 to hit.

LIAM: Doesn't hit, doesn't hit. (clapping)

ASHLEY: Oh my god.

MATT: All righty.

TRAVIS: Wow! Wow!

LIAM: Yep.

MARISHA: Can I spend a ki point to get an extra Sentinel attack?

MATT: Yeah, if you want.

MARISHA: I'm going to do that, I'm going to spend a ki point.

LIAM: Three illusory duplicates, and they--

LAURA: So you just lost all three, but it saved you.

LIAM: But it saved me. You must roll a six or higher with three up, an eight or higher with two up, and an 11 or higher with three up, and I beat each of those.

MATT: That's awesome.

MARISHA: 22.

TRAVIS: Holy crap. Can we animate that?

MARISHA: 14 damage.

MATT: 14 damage, you got it. (laughs)

LIAM: We'll workshop it.

MATT: All right, that finishes Lucien's turn.

LIAM: Shit.

TRAVIS: Fuck.

MATT: Yasha, you're up.

ASHLEY: Okay.

LIAM: He used all my d20s. I got to start over.

ASHLEY: Okay.

LAURA: (laughs) Wah!

TRAVIS: Yeah, let's go.

MARISHA: (whooshing)

TRAVIS: And Matt, just to check, the eye stalks are on the dome and over on the far side?

MATT: There and there.

TRAVIS: Okay. And that's Culpasi and Elatis, right?

MATT: You got it.

ASHLEY: Okay, I am going to ♪ makin' my way to Lucien. ♪

MARISHA: (sobbing) Making my way--

LIAM: Saddest one ever.

MATT: 30, 35, 40 will get you into melee with him.

ASHLEY: Okay. I tried to get it up, guys.

TALIESIN: Do you still have wings, or?

ASHLEY: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Okay.

LAURA: Reckless attack.

ASHLEY: Reckless attack.

TRAVIS: Yeah, let's go. Let's fucking get it.

SAM: Don't forget everybody has celebones still.

MARISHA: Oh yeah. Make this look really cool.

TALIESIN: We're going to go full Guardians of the Galaxy at the end of this. (laughter)

MARISHA: Yeah.

ASHLEY: 25.

MATT: That hits.

LIAM: ♪ Ooga-chaka, ooga-chaka. ♪

ASHLEY: ♪ I can't stop this feeling ♪

MATT: ♪ Deep inside of me ♪

LAURA: Teeny!

ASHLEY: I'm going to do Savage Attacker.

SAM: Oh boy.

ASHLEY: Okay, that is--

TALIESIN: Great.

ASHLEY: Okay.

LIAM: He ain't got no more anti-magic, right?

MATT: Anti-magic is dead.

LIAM: It's all gone, huh?

ASHLEY: First hit is 32 points of damage plus 15 because of the radiant.

LAURA: Wow.

MATT: That's incredible, okay. Okay.

ASHLEY: Second attack, reckless. Okay, it's-- That doesn't make any sense. Oh, 31. 12 plus 19 is 31. Okay.

MATT: Plus 19 for the-- You don't add the 15 again.

LAURA: That's an attack.

ASHLEY: I didn't-- that's attack.

MATT: Oh, to attack, gotcha.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MATT: Then that definitely hits.

ASHLEY: Okay.

TRAVIS: What size creature is Lucien?

MATT: He'd be considered huge.

TRAVIS: Yeah, that's fair.

TALIESIN: Huge!

TRAVIS: Just checking.

MATT: Yeah, three by three.

ASHLEY: Okay.

TRAVIS: Jesus, oh my god.

ASHLEY: That wasn't great.

MATT: Yeah, he stands about 20 feet tall.

ASHLEY: 15 points of damage.

MATT: You got it.

LAURA: Is his body bigger, or is he just higher off the ground and he's still like a human size?

MATT: His body's a little bit larger than it was before. The whole form is swollen with the power of the Somnovem.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: It's looking hurt.

LAURA: (exasperated sigh)

TALIESIN: Been saying that for a while now.

LAURA: I know.

MATT: It's got a lot of hit points.

ASHLEY: Because I have nothing left to lose at this point.

MATT: Yeah.

ASHLEY: Can I use my bonus action to try to roll a natural 20, which is ridiculous?

MATT: If you want to give it a shot.

MARISHA: Yeah, you've got a one in 20 chance.

ASHLEY: Molly? You saved me once, and hopefully I can return the favor.

MATT: Roll a persuasion check.

ASHLEY: Okay. Come on!

LAURA: (laughs)

ASHLEY: It's maverick time. No. (laughter) That's 11.

MATT: 11. Nothing's getting through. Right now with the across-the-field desperation both on your side and apparently growing on Lucien's, it doesn't find purchase in anyone's will.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: Does that finish your turn?

ASHLEY: Yep.

MATT: All right, end of Yasha's turn. He's go ahead and do two legendary actions to do a round of three clawed wing strikes. Those are going to be-- It can't get to Caleb. It'll be against you, Beauregard.

MARISHA: Yep.

MATT: All right. That is going to be a 24 to hit.

MARISHA: Sentinel. Hits.

MATT: You cancel Sentinel off of each other because you both have it.

MARISHA: Oh, that's right, Sentinel doesn't--

TRAVIS: Oh, that's right, that's just what happens when two bad bitches too close.

MARISHA: Go ahead.

ASHLEY: Too bad.

MATT: 23.

ASHLEY: Two bitches too bad.

MARISHA: 23 hits. On that first attack, I'm going to spend a ki point.

TRAVIS: Too fast, too furious.

MATT: Mm-hmm.

MARISHA: To--

MATT: Get a reaction attack?

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah.

MATT: You can totally do that.

MARISHA: Preternatural Counter?

MATT: Yeah, you can do that.

MARISHA: Oh god. All right, yeah, 26.

MATT: That hits, go ahead and roll damage as well.

MARISHA: Fuck you, motherfucker, fucking die. Seven plus five is most definitely 12. Seven plus five is most definitely 12.

MATT: Yeah, 12 points of damage, you got it. Third attack on you. That's cocked. That's a 31.

MARISHA: Hits, I will buy another reaction.

MATT: You can't buy it more than once in one turn.

MARISHA: Oh, I can't buy more than once, fuck fuck fuck.

MATT: Yeah.

MARISHA: It's okay, it's okay.

MATT: It's all good. That'd be a 27 to hit.

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: Oh sorry, only three attacks, so three hits against you. You take... 23 points of slashing damage.

MARISHA: Okay.

TALIESIN: Oof.

MATT: 21 points of slashing damage.

MARISHA: Okay.

MATT: And 19 points of slashing damage.

MARISHA: Okay.

TALIESIN: Oof.

MATT: All right, that finishes Yasha's turn.

LAURA: Oh my god.

MATT: Now we come to... the lair action.

LIAM: Oh, holy shit.

TALIESIN: Fuck, man.

LAURA: No end.

SAM: It's good.

LIAM: It's great, it's great, it's relentless.

MATT: Absorb Flesh once more.

LAURA: No!

MATT: I need everybody make a strength saving throw for me, please.

LIAM: Do I pass this with my buffers up?

MATT: You do.

MARISHA: Dude, that's--

SAM: Save.

LAURA: Is it harder for the--

TRAVIS: What save is it? I'm sorry.

MATT: Strength.

TALIESIN: Nope.

MARISHA: There's no way.

TRAVIS: A natural 20.

MARISHA: Minus eyes, right?

TRAVIS: Minus eyes, 21.

MATT: You are not grappled.

MARISHA: Minus eyes, minus eyes.

TALIESIN: Oh! I can't be grappled.

TRAVIS: What the fuck?

MATT: Yeah, so you're fine.

TALIESIN: I'm fine.

LAURA: That's great.

MATT: Jester?

LAURA: 11.

MATT: Grappled.

SAM: Two. Minus eyes?

MATT: Yeah.

SAM: Zero.

MATT: Grappled.

ASHLEY: Zero, natural one.

MATT: You do have advantage on them because you're raging, don't forget.

ASHLEY: Oh, okay. Jeepers. 21.

SAM: Hey!

MATT: There you go, succeeded.

SAM: Much better.

ASHLEY: Much better.

MATT: Beauregard?

MARISHA: 13.

MATT: Grappled. So just take note of that. Veth, you're up.

ASHLEY: Jeez Louise.

SAM: From my place, what can I see? Can I see that eye over there?

MATT: From where you are right now, you are in the tower, you can see Essek to the right, and Caleb's head on the ground, alive but (panting). But you cannot see Lucien, and there is clouds to the left of you, the Marine Layer.

SAM: And I can't move.

MATT: You can move, it just takes half your movement to get through it.

SAM: Oh, the grapple?

MATT: Oh no, yeah, you failed, right? So you're grappled, you can't move.

LAURA: You can take an action to try to break it, though.

MATT: You can.

SAM: I guess I'll have to if I want to do anything, but then I won't have an action. Is there anything I can do from here that doesn't require me moving?

TALIESIN: Can you see? You can't see--

SAM: I can't see that eyeball over there? It's not within my sight?

MATT: What's what, I'm sorry?

SAM: Whoever that eyeball is over there?

MATT: Actually no, Culpasi would be in your sight, yeah.

SAM: Okay. But I assume if I'm in--

LIAM: Heat it up.

SAM: -- Culpussy's sight, she's in mine?

MATT: You imagine.

SAM: And she can see me, I assume?

MATT: You're in a bunch of rubble, but you'll find out.

LIAM: Friction bad, friction bad.

LAURA: (laughs)

MARISHA: Well.

LIAM: Too much, too much!

TALIESIN: I mean, what else are you going to do?

SAM: I can't throw an item with a bonus action, can I?

MATT: No.

SAM: No, okay. Then I will just fire-- The only other thing I could do is cast a spell, but nah, I will shoot.

MATT: Go for it.

SAM: I will shoot. I don't get disadvantage because I'm grappled or anything, right?

MATT: Mm-mm.

SAM: Okay. That's terrible. That's a 15 to hit.

MATT: 15 misses.

SAM: Figured. Wait, do I have one more of those things? I believe I do, I do. All right, it will shoot around backwards--

MATT: You got it.

SAM: And strike again for 26.

MATT: That hits.

LAURA: Yeah!

TRAVIS: Goddamn it, come on.

LAURA: And you're hitting!

SAM: Oh, that's six. 13 points of damage.

MATT: 13 points of damage to Culpasi, got it. All righty.

SAM: Bonus action, fire again.

MATT: Go for it.

SAM: Cool, 18.

MATT: 18 to hit?

SAM: To hit.

MATT: 18 just hits.

SAM: Ah! And nine more points of damage.

MATT: You got it. All righty.

SAM: Okay.

MATT: Does that finish your turn?

SAM: It has to be.

MATT: All right.

TRAVIS: Which one's Culpasi, on the dome, or on far side? Sorry.

MATT: Culpasi's over there.

TRAVIS: Yep, got it.

MATT: On the far side.

LAURA: Aren't you still in the-- You're not in the smoke anymore? You're out.

SAM: I think Fjord it moved away.

LAURA: Oh, you did, you moved five feet away.

TRAVIS: And that put you out?

SAM: I can't see myself, so I assume so.

MATT: Correct, you moved five feet this way and you moved him out of the cloud.

TRAVIS: Oh, okay. Fuck.

MATT: It's going to use one Legendary Action to have Culpasi go ahead and target you, Marisha. I need you to make a constitution saving throw for me, please.

TRAVIS: Did you move back in the cloud?

MATT: Minus the eyes you have.

MARISHA: Yeah. 12.

TRAVIS: Fuck.

MARISHA: Minus the eyes. Wait, what is this one? This is Culpasi. Okay, okay, okay, okay. Oh my god, I'm going to fail it anyway. No, no, I'm going to take it, I'm going to take it.

MATT: Okay, you are wracked.

MARISHA: I'm wracked.

MATT: With guilt.

MATT: And you are marked by the Somnovem.

MARISHA: Wracked with guilt?

MATT: Correct.

MARISHA: And marked by the Somnovem?

MATT: Correct.

MARISHA: What does that mean?

MATT: You've had something similar happen to you in the previous battle.

MARISHA: I have disadvantage on saving throws.

MATT: Yep, and you seem to take psychic damage whenever you hit your enemy.

LAURA: Oh no.

MATT: All right, now it's the eyes' turn. There are only-- (rolling dice) All righty. Culpasi. All right. Gaudius returns up here, and both of them remain.

LAURA: Has Gaudius taken any hits yet?

MATT: Nope. Culpasi's going to teleport up into here, 30 feet. That is--

TRAVIS: And Gaudius is where?

MATT: Gaudius is right here.

TRAVIS: Got it.

MATT: Gaudius is going to focus on you, Veth.

SAM: Okay.

MATT: I'd like you to make a wisdom saving throw as the embracing love of the Gaudius Somnovem reaches out to your heart.

SAM: Ooh, that's two natural ones.

MATT: And the love finds your heart, and you are bound, and you have to protect the Somnovem against these intruders as you are charmed.

SAM: I do. I will move as far as I can to protect them.

MATT: (laughs) With that, Elatis is going to go ahead and-- It can't focus on anyone in the cloud, so is going to-- It's going to go ahead and teleport up here with its movement, and now it can see Essek, it is going to attempt to--

SAM: (whispering) Marine Layer is the greatest spell in Dungeons & Dragons.

LAURA: It's actually been pretty clutch.

LIAM: Yeah. Same for the Ring of Fire, it took how many episodes?

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Fail.

LIAM: Finally paid off.

MATT: On his own intelligence saving throw, still failed.

SAM: Ha, yeah.

TRAVIS: Long game.

SAM: Been planning, that's why you--

MATT: Essek gets an additional eye.

LAURA: How many eyes is that that Essek has now?

MATT: Essek has five.

LAURA: Oh my god.

MATT: And Essek is drawn immediately to rush in to base to base, overwhelmed with excitement, before stopping right in front of Lucien and going, "Oh no."

SAM: Oh no.

MATT: All righty.

TRAVIS: Yeah, take a-- I mean, you know, if you want to take a break or whatever.

MATT: No, I'm fine.

TRAVIS: Okay, cool.

SAM: No break tonight.

LAURA: No break tonight.

TALIESIN: No break tonight.

LAURA: Peeing is for the weak.

SAM: I've been peeing for the past hour.

MATT: All right, that's going to finish their turn. At the end of that turn, Lucien's going to use his last two Legendary Actions to do three more claw strike attacks against-- You're on the ground.

SAM: Yeah.

MATT: That is going to be a 23 to hit.

LIAM: To me? Yeah, it hits.

MATT: Okay. 30 to hit.

LIAM: Sure.

MATT: And 31 to hit.

LIAM: I don't think you need to roll damage, I'm out.

MATT: Well, we'll see.

LIAM: I'm at 22 hit points.

MATT: We'll see. That is going to be 22 exactly.

TRAVIS: So you're out.

LIAM: It was my turn, gone.

MATT: So as one claw strikes Caleb on the ground, the blood spouts from his mouth as he falls unconscious. The wing pulls up a second time, and two of the points just stick right through Caleb's chest and stomach. As they withdraw, the blood dripping from the tips, Caleb is left lifeless and still.

TRAVIS: Can y'all-- All right, it's canceled out.

LAURA: None of us can see it.

TRAVIS: Your Sentinel cancels, right?

MATT: It does.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MATT: All right.

LAURA: But you're not grappled, right? Caduceus isn't grappled.

TALIESIN: I am not grappled.

MATT: Caduceus, it's your turn now.

TRAVIS: Are you grappled?

TALIESIN: One second, you just fucked my shit up a little bit. Okay.

MARISHA: Yeah, I've already used Sentinel this turn, right? So I can't do it again this round?

MATT: As long as you keep buying it on other peoples' turns, you can do it, but you can't do it more than once per turn.

MARISHA: But if I spend a ki point, I can? On this turn?

MATT: So with him attacking Caleb there, you could buy another ki point.

LAURA: Does that mean Caleb is fully slain?

TRAVIS: You're dead.

MATT: Correct.

LIAM: Because you had three attacks, the first one made me unconscious, and then you had to more to play.

MATT: Correct, and the melee attacks are auto-crit if they hit.

LIAM: Right.

MATT: So it was--

LIAM: So attack two and attack three--

MATT: Attack two took care of two death saving throws, the third attack was two more, so yeah, for sure, finished off.

MARISHA: 23 to hit.

MATT: That hits.

MARISHA: Another 14 points of damage, another seven.

MATT: 14 points of damage.

TRAVIS: Is he looking rough at all?

MATT: He's looking very rough.

TRAVIS: All right.

ASHLEY: But I wonder if we have to take the eyes out first.

MATT: Caduceus, what are you doing?

TALIESIN: Who can I see from my current vantage point?

MATT: From your current vantage point, you can see-- you have Fjord and Jester right next to you.

TALIESIN: And then I can see--

MATT: You can see Veth in the rubble of the tower, and you can see Beau and Yasha.

TALIESIN: So that's Fjord, Jester, me.

MARISHA: Oh god.

TALIESIN: Okay, hold on. Why did you go down? I was just looking at you. Six, so one, two, three, four, five, six. I can do everybody except for Caleb, so. Can I see Essek? I can't see Essek.

MATT: You cannot see Essek.

TALIESIN: Okay. I'm going to cast Mass Healing Word at 5th-level.

LAURA: Oh yeah, Healing Word is different than Mass Cure Wounds.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

LAURA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Oh, I have Mass Cure Wounds.

LAURA: That does more healing.

TALIESIN: It does. I'm going to use Mass Cure Wounds.

LAURA: But you have to be able to see the people. You don't have to be able to see-- why would you do-- Oh, one's a bonus action, that's why.

MATT: Correct.

TALIESIN: Oh, then I'm going to do the other one. I'm going to do Mass Healing Word because I'm actually going to use my action. 1d4 plus your spellcasting ability modifier. Okay, that's a 5th-level, that's 3d4 plus five, so. Everybody, ooh yeah. Four, five, six, seven. Gets 15 hit points back.

SAM: Everybody where?

TALIESIN: Everybody. You get 15.

ASHLEY: You get 15, you get 15!

LIAM: That includes Caleb?

TALIESIN: Well no, I can't see you.

LIAM: Oh, I'm dead, too.

TALIESIN: You're dead, it wouldn't have helped.

SAM: So you can heal me even though you can't see me?

TALIESIN: I can see you.

SAM: You can see me, great.

TALIESIN: I'm in the--

MATT: But Essek does not heal, because you can't see Essek.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

SAM: You said 15?

TALIESIN: 15.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: And then I'm going to use-- I'm going to-- fuck, should I just hold my action or should I just go for it and hope for the best? How far away is the furthest eye? I can't quite--

MATT: The furthest eye from you that you can see--

TALIESIN: The closest eye, I mean.

MATT: Closest eye would be Elatis, which is somewhere in the neighborhood of, I'd say...

TALIESIN: Way too far, not 30 feet.

MATT: Yeah, it's about 60 or so feet from you.

TALIESIN: Okay, fuck that then. I'm going to-- I'm going to... hold-- Fuck it, I'm going to hold Path of the Grave until-- I'm just going to cast it, I know everything's going to get fucked up. Casting Path of the Grave on Lucien.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: What does Path of the Grave do?

TALIESIN: It's going to double the next actual attack. It's just going to take double damage.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: Okay. That finishes your turn?

TALIESIN: Yeah, other than that, yeah, I think I might roll around to the other side of Fjord just to break this up a little bit.

MATT: Okay, over here?

MATT: Up there, you mean?

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: Okay, that finishes your turn. He has no more Legendary Actions, he's spent them all already. Jester, you're up.

MARISHA: Oh.

LAURA: Can I see Lucien?

MATT: You can, because you're next to Fjord. Just around the corner you have the back view of him.

LAURA: Okay. Does that Path of the Grave work on spell damage?

TALIESIN: Nope.

LAURA: Or just melee?

TALIESIN: Just melee.

MATT: Well, whatever is an attack, right?

TALIESIN: An attack, any attack. A spell attack, it would double.

LAURA: Okay, I'm going to cast--

MATT: Does it say, or is it weapon attack? Double check what it says.

TALIESIN: That's a good question. "An attack."

MATT: So yeah, a spell attack would be doubled.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: As long as it has an attack roll.

TALIESIN: Mm-hmm.

LAURA: I'm going to cast Guiding Bolt at 4th-level on Lucien.

MATT: Okay, go ahead and roll for an attack.

LAURA: (snapping) 24.

MATT: 24 hits. Go ahead and roll damage.

LAURA: Okay. That's 7d6. 11, 21, 26, 29, doubled. 29 points doubled.

MATT: To... Fifty--

LAURA: Eight.

MATT: How do you want to do this? (cheering)

TRAVIS: Oh my god!

TALIESIN: Cleric tag team, oh!

LAURA: I'm going to look at him and I'm going to go: I know you're in there, Molly. We love you so much and we want you back. Lucien doesn't deserve you.

MATT: As you send off the blast of Guiding Bolt, it strikes the chest of Lucien. As it begins to burn away from the inside of his body, he begins to scream as the Somnovem flicker and burn and explode around him. His own hand reaches up into the wound, and both sides tear himself into two separate pieces. As both sides limply fall back, collapses to the ground, no longer moving. And we're going to take a break.

TRAVIS: Oh my god!

SAM: Break?!

TRAVIS: Oh my god! Oh my god.

MATT: We'll be back here in a few minutes. We'll see you then.

TRAVIS: We got stalks up, we got stalks up.

Break
(chanting in foreign language)

V.O.: This is everything you need to know about our terrain in 60 seconds. We hand sculpt our pieces for maximum detail and artistry, infusing passion into every millimeter of our work. Everything is available, beautifully hand painted so you can start playing right away or you can choose unpainted to paint everything yourself. Our pieces are completely modular, so you can use the same sets to create a new adventure every time. We create everything out of dwarvenite, our top secret PVC formula, that's nearly indestructible. We pack our pieces with as many features as possible such as swappable LEDs to quickly change the look of your scene. We offer magnetic accessories to add flavor or increase the danger. A one inch tactical grid is sculpted into our floors. We offer a range of environments, including dungeons caverns, cities, castles, sewers, forests, mountains streets, burrows, ice, and hellscape and that's just the beginning. That's everything you need to know about Dwarven Forge in 60 seconds.

We should all just have our own sort of like a Burning Man or a Coachella you know where we just all get together and do our own thing cause we haven't seen like so many people and the whole work crew and you know our extended D & D and voice actor and beyond world. Yeah. We should all do a single camp right? That's the lingo right? That's what I'm saying A single camp with just a hundred of us Yeah but it's in a Burbank. No! Yeah we just all take a spot along the five. Just everyone line up. That's an idea How much would it cost to rent that closed down Ikea for the day for a lot of hugging. We need to keep the Swedish meatballs. Well, no, it's closed down, those meatballs, plus those were horse meat anyway weren't they? Was that what they found out? Maybe we could do the WB and then the security there could chase us out like the Animaniacs. Yes, exactly. Oh Animaniacs.

LAURA: Hey critters, Laura Bailey here. Let's see what's up in the Critical Role shop. Roll an investigation if you want it's basically perfect. Oh my gosh it's so amazing. I mean, seriously, look, I have this thing. I mean the Traveler always says impulse purchases are a good decision. Darling, I recommend buying two, one for you and another for you, let's be honest. So click on over to the Critical Role shop. Don't worry there's a few more minutes in the break. You still got time.

MATT: Hey, I'm jumping in here to also bring in a big, special thanks to a handful of people who helped me put together the final aspects of these encounters, and the epic kind of climax of Campaign Two. A big thank you to Russ Charles and Mat Hart of Steamforged Games for working with me to sculpt and paint the Lucien boss minis you saw over these past two episodes. I could not have sculpted them anywhere near as good or customized them, and Mat was so nice to paint them for me, because I couldn't rightfully, in the middle of a pandemic, when we're always home, my wife, paint these things without her seeing it at some point, and spoiling shit, so big thank you. Check out their wonderful work at steamforged.com. Big thank you to Mats by Mars, who does a lot of our maps, most of them you see out here, the mats that I unroll and use for the base of a lot of battlefields. They custom made this mat for me for this battle, and so a big thank you to Mats by Mars. You can go to matsbymars.com to check out their work, and a huge thank you for Colm McGuinness, fantastic music composer, who customized not one, but two battle tracks specifically for this fight, along with, you know, swell cues for victory, the intro piece, we went back and forth with music, and he's just incredible, and I love it so much. So, thank you so much to all those wonderful people. Please check them out, and yeah, thank you for joining us for this crazy night.

TALIESIN: Like a symphony playing to an empty theater Critical Role dines alone without its audience. Yes, that validating and most enthusiastic congregation on the other side of the fourth wall. And what is this fourth wall separating the viewer from the creator, a portal to an often sought point of connection or the Twitch subscription zone on the rare occasion that you miss the live bacchanal boasted by the ragtag group of thespians on Thursday night. you may always view the show on demand in the Shadowland known as the Twitch subscription zone. Picture if you will the necessary pieces to complete a jigsaw puzzle but it's up to you to choose how it will be solved. You could of course subscribe with your debt rectangle but many more divergent paths lie before you perhaps you found yourself in possession of an Amazon Prime account, you would then wake up to discover a free Twitch subscription each month for a channel of your choosing. But this artifact demands renewal for you must resubscribe each month to quench it's unyielding thirst. One need not walk alone. Those who have already found their way can illuminate the path for others via the gift of sub button on Twitch. Critical role is humbled by your subscription and wishes to thank you. From behind the thin veil of this fourth wall. We hope you enjoy our content as much as we enjoy making it. And so ends another meandering digression a complicated parody, promo down an indistinct highway to the region we call the Twitch subscription zone. You will subscribe Twitch prime subscribe, gift subscribe, subscribe.

Part II
MATT: Welcome back. In the quiet, tense aftermath of Lucien, Cognouza's fall at the hands of the Mighty Nein, the misshapen body of Lucien collapsed to the ground. The body ripped open from face to sternum, nearly in half, tumbled to the ground and folded over itself. The remaining eyes of the Somnovem, gone. In that quiet, you hear whispers in your mind. "Thank you." "Thank you." "Thank you." Dozens, hundreds, thousands of voices saying, "Thank you." And you watch as these motes of light begin to drift out of the walls and surrounding space and float up and out. The individual spirits, minds, souls, of every Aeorian trapped and suffering for over a thousand years, finally left to rest. As that happens, the red glaring eyes upon your bodies also begin to fade as the will that had tethered itself to you, ever hungry, was now gone. But in this moment, you also acknowledge that one of you has been lost. Caleb Widogast is lifeless on the ground.

TALIESIN: I run over and cast Gentle Repose just to hold--

LAURA: I run over next to Caduceus. We can do this together.

TALIESIN: We can do this.

LAURA: Caleb? Caleb, you're going to be okay. God, I hope I have it. Okay. (laughs) I'm going to cast Revivify with one of my diamonds that we got.

TALIESIN: I'm going to help.

LAURA: Bring Arty down and set him on Caleb's stomach. Be like: Come on, man, you missed the whole fight. You got to be here for Caleb.

MATT: As soon as you put your hands down, a second pair of hands, or now it would be a third pair of hands with you there, rests on top of both of yours as the green familiar cloak of Artagan, the Traveler now meets the two of you atop your fallen friend, says, "Terribly sorry, I tried. These minds were keeping me at bay. My apologies. Let us try, then." Roll a d20 for me, if you don't mind.

LAURA: I'm just going to clear all these out. Do I add anything to it?

MATT: Your wisdom modifier.

LAURA: 22?

MATT: Yeah. That should suffice. As all of your hands together press down, and as you pull your hands back, Caleb's chest expands with them and breath enters his lungs once more.

TALIESIN: Welcome back, Mr. Caleb.

LAURA: (shakily) You're okay.

LIAM: Is it over?

LAURA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: I think so.

LAURA: You did it!

LIAM: Insight check.

LAURA: (laughs)

LIAM: It's a 26.

LAURA: (laughs)

LIAM: Thank you.

LAURA: Oh, well, yeah.

TALIESIN and LAURA: We did it.

LIAM: Thank you.

MATT: "Thank you." "Thank you." "Thank you." "Thank you." The voices just continue this cavalcade nonstop around you.

MARISHA: I reach over and I grab Yasha's hand and just grab her and just grabbed her by the face and kiss her.

ASHLEY: I kiss her back, I kiss her in each spot where the eyes were.

MARISHA: And then I just slowly turn and look at Lucien's body.

ASHLEY: Same.

MARISHA: Just kind of still holding her hand. Start to walk over. Yeah.

LAURA: Yeah, I'm going to turn around and I imagine he fell right next to Caleb, right?

MATT: Yeah, fairly close by.

LAURA: I'm going to crawl over and look at his body. Does he seem like, does he have the eyes still on his body? Does he still seem monstrous in form or?

MATT: The eyes are gone and the swollen form seems to have diminished somewhat, the power having evacuated.

MARISHA: He's kind of laying on his side?

MATT: Yeah, still the lower half in the creature's form and just the whole thing is fallen there.

MARISHA: Oh.

ASHLEY: Oh, so it's--

SAM: Is there a way to--

MARISHA: Get him out?

SAM: Get him out? Yeah.

TRAVIS: To get who out?

LIAM: I limp over, look over Jester's shoulder at the body.

SAM: Is it all just connected or is there a way that we can sort of cut through?

MATT: I mean, it's up for you to try if you want to. It looks connected.

ASHLEY: I try to start pulling some things away to try to see if--

MATT: Make a strength check.

ASHLEY: 23.

MATT: 23? Pulling back and you yank it where the flesh tethers are on the midsection of Lucien's body and you tear some of it away. And you can see it tears some of the skin. As you pull back, some of the tendon connections you do see beneath it, the body continues, layered within this fleshy exterior.

ASHLEY: I just start rage ripping.

MARISHA: I help her, just not as efficiently because I'm weak as fuck, but I help.

MATT: You begin to pull and tear. It will take a while doing this with your hands and within a few minutes of your fingers beginning to bloody from the process of trying to rip extremely strong tendons and musculature, you see more and more of the body within. Not fully emerged, just covered by whatever had connected with him in the city in the Somnovem. But Lucien, the legs do continue within if you wish to continue.

LIAM: Get him out of there.

ASHLEY: Yeah. Yeah. I just keep going.

MARISHA: I pull out a knife. I start helping chop away--

MATT: With your knife, makes it a little easier and between the two of you, over the next five or so minutes, you eventually cut enough free where you begin to grab his torso and pull. And as you do, Lucien comes free from the seating within the swollen base. from the seating within the swollen base. Bloody, naked, still heavy gash in the front, lifeless.

LIAM: I'm going to stumble over by the body and pull out my Transmuter's Stone and place it on his chest and look around at everyone here. Why did we come this far if not for this?

LAURA: Are we sure it won't bring Lucien back?

LIAM: Somnovem is gone. If he's still twisted, he will be alone. And we will be able to handle him, but what if? Why did we go so far and fight so hard? We would do this for any one of us.

SAM: Yes, of course. I think he's still in there.

LAURA: I know he is.

TRAVIS: You don't think that he's one of these golden motes of light that's being released?

MATT: (as Essek) "Are you sure this is even wise to attempt?"

LIAM: Once you're a member of the Mighty Nein, you're in. You should know that by now.

SAM: He's right. And right now there's only eight of us.

LIAM: Do either of you two good folk have any diamonds left?

TALIESIN: I do.

MARISHA: Are we going to do this here?

LIAM: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Do we do this at home?

LIAM: No, now.

ASHLEY: May I check to see if there's anywhere on his body that he might've saved that four-leaf clover?

MATT: Make an investigation check.

TRAVIS: Oh yeah. Can I assist or join her and look for a fucking Bag of Holding?

MATT: That's not an assist. That that'd be your own separate--

TRAVIS: My own separate investigation?

MATT: Make an investigation check.

TRAVIS: Investigation check?

MARISHA: Yes.

LAURA: While they're looking, I'm just going to put my hand on Caleb's shoulder.

TRAVIS: 26.

MATT: 26?

TRAVIS: Natural 19 plus seven.

MATT: Damn!

SAM: What are you looking for?

ASHLEY: 23.

MARISHA: Our fucking Bag of Holding.

LAURA: I'm going to cast Cure Wounds at level three on Caleb to get your health up a little bit.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: That'll eat the nuclear football. (laugh)

MATT: A very, very thorough glance. Unfortunately, it does not look like the four-leaf clover has survived the journey.

LAURA: (whispering) 20.

MATT: And can not be found. The Bag of Holding does not reside within Lucien's body. With a roll that high, you frantically begin to scout about the environment. And if you recall, and you do with that roll, when you saw Lucien enter the chamber when you were talking to the Somnovem, where he had the cluster of the intuit charges, you saw a bag on the ground.

TRAVIS: The bag, that's right.

MATT: And you glance over and look in that direction and the landscape has shifted and has changed. And you could try and search the space there.

TRAVIS: Uh-huh.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: Yeah, I'll run over and frantically start trying to search.

LAURA: Can I give him Guidance?

MATT: For the sake of this, because this is a chained challenge here to the high investigation roll guided you to that memory, roll one more investigation check, please.

TRAVIS: Oh god.

MATT: With Guidance.

TRAVIS: What is that, a d4?

LAURA: Oh no.

ASHLEY: Can I help him search?

TRAVIS: 16.

MATT: 16. Looking about the space, a lot of what once remained, even any sign of the leftover expended intuit charges, even any sign of the leftover expended intuit charges, seemed to have been swallowed by the interior of the chamber in the city itself.

TRAVIS: I remember he had a bag with the intuit charges and it was over here, but it may have been lost.

LAURA: I close my eyes and I'm going to imagine the bag emerging from the wall.

MATT: Okay. You imagine it very hard. Go ahead and just roll a d20. Add your wisdom modifier and that's it. Natural 20.

MATT: No way.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

MATT: It's not that I don't trust you, but take a picture, I want to see that. I want to see that. That's awesome, I love it.

TRAVIS: Why didn't I think of that shit? (laughter)

MATT: That's awesome.

LIAM: I'd love it if we all got photo of a three.

MATT: We're just collecting all the d20 pictures tonight. All the natural 20 rolls tonight I have we're just saving in a gallery now after this. That is awesome.

LAURA: It looks really pretty, this picture, just because of the cake. It looks really nice.

MATT: (laughs) I love it, I love it. Oh my god, it's the CR top, too, I love it!

LAURA: (laughs)

MATT: That's ridiculous.

LIAM: Ooh, perfect.

MATT: Without the eyes emblazoned on your body, without the presence of manifestation enhancing aether. without the presence of manifestation enhancing aether. To will something of any magnitude in this space is an incredibly challenging test of one's mental fortitude and intent.

LAURA: I got a good imagination.

MATT: Thankfully, you have a very good imagination. (laughter)

MARISHA: So perfect.

MATT: You've lived in your imagination for most of your life and your journey from child to adult, to cleric, to friend, to adventurer, to hero has only strengthened that. And as you're concentrating, Fjord, you glance over in the space where you swear you looked before and you see (high pitched puff) almost ejected out of the dying flesh of the city, your Bag of Holding.

TRAVIS: (panting) Slide. (laughter)

TRAVIS: I reach in and try and pull out the Cloven Crystal.

MATT: You pull your hand out and you sense the cold, familiar, spherical shape of the third and final key.

TRAVIS: I put it back in. I put it back in, close the bag, I walk over to Jester, and I just wrap my arms around her. Thank you. Thank you.

LAURA: (giggles)

LIAM: Do we have that diamond on his navel, please?

TALIESIN: The big one?

LIAM: Yeah.

SAM: The big naval?

LAURA: I've got a 500-gold diamond.

TALIESIN: That's the one I'm burning.

LAURA: Okay.

LIAM: Caleb is going to set his hands on the Transmuter Stone, which is as big as an ostrich egg and think of all the time and energy that went into making him able to destroy and tear down, and how good it feels to subvert that and turn it and use it to build and restore and heal, and begin to summon up every ounce of learning and ability and skill and inspiration and imagination I have and channel it into the stone. And fill it with the shared connection that everyone here has, and try to summon our friend back from the beyond. and try to summon our friend back from the beyond.

MARISHA: I just place my hand down on top of his just for moral support if anything else.

LIAM: I release a hand and put it on the shoulder. For old time's sake.

MATT: So I assume you're using the stone to cast Raise Dead.

LIAM: Raise Dead. It will destroy it.

MATT: Yes. The stone immediately begins to crack and from those exposed interior bits, a warm, light blue light begins to drift out across the sundered body of Lucien. The light begins to envelop the body and there's a brief, tiny little light in the cold eyes that's been snagged. The ritual has begun. Who will be the first to step up?

LIAM: Caleb looks to Yasha.

MARISHA: Oh my god.

LAURA: Oh god, oh god.

TRAVIS: Is the body fully bisected?

MATT: It's not fully bisected, but the front is torn open. It's just been pushed back together for now.

TRAVIS: We don't need to heal that first?

MATT: Resurrection magic generally will take care of--

TRAVIS: That's some crazy shit, okay.

ASHLEY: What do I do?

LIAM: Ladies.

LAURA: Yeah?

MARISHA: Okay.

LAURA: Oh god, I got to think.

SAM: Just talk to him.

ASHLEY: I still--

SAM: Bring your memories to him.

ASHLEY: I think I have his coat.

SAM: Mm-hmm. Sounds right.

TRAVIS: Beau does.

MARISHA: I have his belt. I think you have his coat.

TRAVIS: Oh right.

ASHLEY: I take out his jacket and smell it and I sort of lay it over him and I get really close and sort of kneel by his face. Please come back to us. I've missed you so much. I don't really know what to say or how you're supposed to do this, but all I want is for you to be here right now. And be whole. I just lean down and give him a kiss on the cheek.

MATT: Okay. Go ahead and make a persuasion check with advantage.

ASHLEY: 15.

MATT: As you pull away from kissing the cheek, the blue glow around the body, as the magic begins to set in, you see the two slightly offset sides come together and the wound becomes just a line. Who wants to make the next offering?

LAURA: I will step up. I'm going to pull up the tarot card deck and I'm going to kneel down-- if you're at his head, I'll kneel down on his left hand side and face him and I'm going to say: So I took the cards and I've added a few to it. And I think you're going to be super impressed with everything I've been doing. But I still need you here to teach me everything because I'm kind of bullshitting, Molly. I don't really know what I'm doing, so if you could, like, come back and be my sensei, I'd really appreciate that. Thank you.

MATT: Okay. That is another persuasion check.

LAURA: That makes it harder.

MATT: It does make it harder, but it can be done, if you roll high enough. So, go ahead and roll another persuasion check.

LAURA: 17.

MATT: 17, okay. The blue light pulses and glows. The spell is still in effect. Who would like to make the last offering?

LIAM: Third time's the charm. Empty no longer, Mr. Tealeaf.

MARISHA: I step up and I say, We couldn't save you the first time. We weren't strong enough, and that's not true any longer. And I take off the belt around my hands and I lay one that I ripped and put over his third eye and I take the second one and I just wad it and hold it against his heart, pressing what blood is left in there into the surface of his skin. And I say: It's time to remind me of how much of an asshole I am. Just holding the belt tightly to his body. Just holding the belt tightly to his body.

MATT: Okay. That'll be a third persuasion check.

MARISHA: A persuasion check. Fuck, that's what I was not going for.

MATT: What were you going for?

MARISHA: I don't know, I was just-- (laughter)

MARISHA: -- trying to do something else with the blood and tap into his blood hunter shit.

MATT: Would you prefer to do a medicine check? And trying to treat the wounds?

LAURA: Oh, I should've done that.

MATT: You're appealing to the spirit and the soul.

MARISHA: Yeah, I'll do a medicine check. I'll do a medicine check.

MATT: So you're trying to clarify the ritual and make sure that there is a body to return to. Okay. Go ahead and make a medicine check.

MARISHA: 16.

MATT: 16. Okay. As the light gathers around the body, the magic attempting to reach out into whatever space holds the souls here in the Astral Sea, as so many go scattering outward now to search for one, a fragment of one. Or is it a whole one? If souls can grow from but a piece. To try and reverse the trajectory of that one, if it is indeed available.

LAURA: Oh no!

TRAVIS: I can't believe that just happened.

SAM: I get to reroll ones. (laughter)

MATT: Unfortunately, it doesn't work that way. The magic feels like it finds something, but maybe it's because it's just a fragment of the spirit, it's not strong enough to bring it back. It's not strong enough magic. And as the light fades, the body is restored. The wounds are cleaned and there before you is the body you remember as Mollymauk Tealeaf. Sans the red eyes, of course. But the spirit did not return.

LIAM: He's lifeless.

MATT: He is.

SAM: But we know it's him.

LAURA: At least we let him--

MATT: You know it's his body.

LIAM: I lean down, kiss him on the forehead where he kissed me a long time ago, and push the sweaty hair out of his face. You are frustrating and we will miss you.

MATT: Essek gets up in a huff, walks about 20 feet away.

ASHLEY: There's nothing else to do? Caleb? (sniffing)

LIAM: I tried.

ASHLEY: Well, we can't leave him here.

TALIESIN: No.

SAM: No, no. I mean, there's a hill next to a road that he should be buried at.

TALIESIN: Or--

LAURA: Something even better.

TALIESIN: I think I can do something better. If that's all right?

LIAM: Here or later?

TALIESIN: He can come home with me.

LAURA: Yeah.

LIAM: I start to place pieces of amber around his body.

LAURA: His name was Mollymauk Tealeaf. I mean, he's asking to be turned into dead people tea.

SAM: Probably very strong stuff.

LAURA: I'm glad he's not trapped in Lucien anymore.

SAM: No.

MARISHA: Me, too.

TRAVIS: And he had a second fight. He helped us along the way.

LAURA: He did.

LIAM: Just might not have been able to do it without him.

MARISHA: Let's find the prettiest place in The Blooming Grove.

TALIESIN: Everywhere is the prettiest place in The Blooming Grove. It'll be--

LIAM: I begin the slow process of casting the Vault of Amber to bring him with us.

TRAVIS: As Caleb's doing that, I'll walk over to Essek and just quietly ask him: Are you all right?

MATT: "It's not fair. (crying) It's not fair."

TRAVIS: No.

MATT: "We've all come so far. It's just not fair."

TRAVIS: It rarely is. You did more for us, and for him, than most anyone we know.

MATT: "I spent my entire life studying the intent to not let things like this happen to chance. That can't be it, can it?"

TRAVIS: I don't know. But if you were to ask my wise friend, Caduceus, I'm sure he would tell you that life continues on. It changes, it evolves, and it grows. I don't think there's an end. You just might not be able to see the next trip. But you have more time. You have more time to study. You have a talent that I don't understand. Use that anger, that frustration. Let it fuel you. If you have any regret or grief over what you've done in your life, I see nothing but good, and nothing but an opportunity for you to turn it around. You've shown me all I need to see.

LAURA: What do we do with the city?

SAM: Is the ground withering up or anything?

MATT: Looking about about the chamber, you can see the color is graying. The pinks and reds and purples and browns and oranges have all just begun to leave pale.

TALIESIN: Do we leave one of those psychic machines, if we have one left? Just in case anyone ever decides to wander over here again.

TRAVIS: Charges? Do they stay eternally set?

LAURA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Until something comes near it.

LAURA: Hopefully, the city will die and rot away.

TALIESIN: I'm just going to start doing a little walk and start just letting the decomposition flow out of my hands and just slowly bring the city to a close.

MATT: Fungus, moss, all sorts of life that hasn't existed within this city since it's found itself here, begins to take hold and root. And you know in time it'll spread.

TALIESIN: It'll be enough.

MARISHA: Did you all hear those thank yous?

LAURA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Yes.

LAURA: That's a long time to be trapped.

MARISHA: A very long time. This wasn't a waste.

TALIESIN: Oh, no.

MARISHA: We may be heroes that no one knows about.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

MARISHA: But we know.

TRAVIS: God, you're right.

LIAM: I know it was a hard-fought victory, but it still feels like we lost.

MATT: Essek walks up to you. "Caleb Widogast, have you ever accepted defeat?"

LIAM: Maybe today for the first time. Or... a change in direction, anyway.

LAURA: What are you thinking, Essek?

MATT: "I don't know. I just wish there was more I could do. Anyone could do. Unfortunately, this type of magic is beyond my purview."

LIAM: Takes a full 20 minutes as a ritual to use the amber.

SAM: Are you putting him inside?

LIAM: Ja, yes. We give him a bit of--

LAURA: I give him a kiss before he goes in.

TALIESIN: I very quietly--

LIAM: A few minutes left, now is the time.

TALIESIN: -- in the corner cast Divine Intervention. I'm just sort of curious.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: Please tell me what this means, because--

TRAVIS: No.

LAURA: Did you succeed? Did you just succeed again? Wow, the the Wild Mother really loves him. (laughter)

TRAVIS: I mean, that's what you get for trusting a weasel.

LIAM: You had a pretty baller episode, Jester Lavorre.

MATT: You rolled a fucking 2 percent?

TALIESIN: I did.

MARISHA: You rolled 2 percent?

TRAVIS: You really did?

TALIESIN: I did.

LIAM: Holy fuck!

LAURA: Oh my god. Wild Mother, please, be with us right now.

TRAVIS: Hold on, hold on, hold on.

MATT: And what are you--?

TALIESIN: Whoever it was, just put it back. I think they've earned it. Put it back.

MATT: (laughs) I fucking love this game so much.

LIAM: Did you fucking roll a zero-two? That's what happened? Holy shit.

MATT: Of all the fungus and moss that has grown through the decomposition, more plants begin to grow as well.

MARISHA: I can't deal with the emotional whiplash.

ASHLEY: I mean, my god!

LIAM: (laughs)

ASHLEY: I'm exhausted!

TRAVIS: Wait, wait, let him finish.

MARISHA: Sorry.

MATT: Vines and flowers and roots and ferns begin to bloom and blossom out of the ground surrounding his body. Begin to encase it in a way that's oddly familiar to one of you. You feel in this place of cold stillness, of death and vacancy, a warm breeze. It smells sweet, with hints of ocean. The green turns to brown and pulls away. Your eyes open for the first time. (gasping, laughter)

TALIESIN: Bolts up and runs!

SAM: Wait, no, no, no!

LAURA: No!

SAM: I chase after. (laughter)

TALIESIN: Stops. (laughter)

LIAM: 100 episodes or so later.

TALIESIN: Empty, empty, empty. Empty.

ASHLEY: Molly? Mollymauk Tealeaf?

TALIESIN: Empty?

ASHLEY: No.

TALIESIN: Love? Love. Magician. Tinkerer.

LAURA: (laughs)

SAM: I'll cast Disguise Self and turn myself into a goblin.

TALIESIN: I jump back. Joy.

LAURA: I go up and I hug him.

TALIESIN: Sea? Rumor.

LAURA: (laughs)

TALIESIN: Looks at the other two. Empty? And he goes and lies down.

LAURA: Molly. Do you want some clothes?

SAM: Or a jacket?

TALIESIN: Joy.

LAURA: I'll get out my paintbrushes and I'll start painting him his old outfit, give him some really flamboyant and flourishy clothes. I don't need to give you a coat, though. We have that for you.

LIAM: Caleb simultaneously pulls Veth into sort of a shoulder hug, low on the left, and wrings an arm around Essek's neck, to the right and pulls them both in close. And just watches the group descend on Mollymauk.

ASHLEY: I'm Yasha.

TALIESIN: Love. And I go over and give a big hug.

ASHLEY: I give the biggest hug back.

TALIESIN: Love.

ASHLEY: I look a little different, but everything else is still kind of the same. Except (whispering) I fell in love.

MARISHA: Beauregard.

TALIESIN: Empty.

MARISHA: Molly. Unless, I guess, you feel like you want to change it, now's a good time.

LIAM: You might need a new moniker.

TALIESIN: Hmm. Empty. Home?

LAURA: Yeah, we can go home. This is not home. I go over to Caduceus.

SAM: Yep, yep.

LIAM: Yep, he's here still.

TALIESIN: I didn't think that would work.

MARISHA: (laughs)

LAURA: How did you do that?

TALIESIN: I asked politely.

LAURA: You're amazing.

TALIESIN: Anybody can do it, it's really--

LAURA: I really-- I can't. I tried.

TALIESIN: I don't know, give him some time.

LAURA: Yeah. I give Caduceus a big kiss on the cheek.

TALIESIN: Aww.

LAURA: You did it.

TALIESIN: No, we. Everybody did it. This is-- I'm so tired.

LAURA: Yeah, we should go home.

TALIESIN: Where do you want to go?

LAURA: I don't-- I mean, I don't know if we have control over it. I just--

TALIESIN: We do.

LAURA: We do?

TALIESIN: Yeah. I think so. I'm pretty sure.

TRAVIS: Where can we go?

SAM: How can we go?

LAURA: Plane Shift, if Caduceus has it prepared. I'm kind of tapped out.

TALIESIN: I think I can probably manage.

MATT: Did you save a 7th-level slot?

LAURA: He did.

TALIESIN: I did.

MATT: (laughs)

MARISHA: Xhorhaus? Nicodranas?

SAM: Ooh.

LAURA: Oh, we shouldn't go back to Xhorhaus.

SAM: The Gentleman?

LIAM: I also saved my reserves. So wherever we go--

SAM: We can get somewhere else.

LIAM: We can gather together, or we can get somewhere else.

MARISHA: Have a nice night in the tower.

LAURA: Maybe the Blooming Grove.

MARISHA: That sounds nice.

SAM: No one to bury.

TALIESIN: At your service.

LAURA: It's really beautiful, though.

SAM: It is.

TALIESIN: Oh, with any luck, all of you will end up there one day. That would make me very happy.

ASHLEY: Honestly?

LAURA: Oh, good.

TRAVIS: That seems like a sweet sentiment, but yes.

MARISHA: (laughs)

TRAVIS: The surroundings aren't changing or deteriorating rapidly? They're just continuing on their normal--?

MATT: Make a perception check.

TRAVIS: 14.

MATT: 14. The best you can tell, other than the coloration shift, it's not falling apart, crumbling or anything. Just becoming pale.

TRAVIS: Okay.

ASHLEY: Hey, Caduceus.

TALIESIN: Yeah?

ASHLEY: You guys didn't get to meet.

LAURA: (laughs)

TALIESIN: I was letting you all have your moment.

ASHLEY: No, please, by all means. (laughter)

TALIESIN: The following accents I will not be responsible for. (laughter)

TALIESIN: (as Caduceus) Mollymauk, I guess? Mr. Tealeaf? Hello. How are you feeling? (as Molly) Empty? (as Caduceus) Yeah, he's as riveting as you all said. (laughter)

SAM: He's normally way more entertaining than this, I promise.

MARISHA: Just give it a few days.

TALIESIN: We'll see where it goes.

LAURA: I'm going to pull out the tuning fork that Allura gave me.

TRAVIS: Wait.

LAURA: Oh, wait.

TRAVIS: I'm going to go over to Caleb and put my hand on his shoulder and give him a Cure Wounds at 5th-level. Because you have one hit point, don't you?

LAURA: No, I Cure Woundsed to him at 3rd-level.

LIAM: But I'm still pretty low.

TRAVIS: I'll give it to you anyway. Anybody else in the single digits?

MARISHA: I'm not single.

SAM: Probably Mollymauk.

TALIESIN: Probably Mollymauk.

LAURA: Yeah, Molly is probably at one hit point.

MATT: Mm-hmm.

SAM: I've got this new explosive arrow I was about to try out. (laughter)

TRAVIS: I'll put it in Molly just in case shit goes awry. I'll come over, I'll use Minor Image to create a little fruit salad and walk over. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Put a 5th-level Cure Wounds.

TALIESIN: I don't know what my hit points are, but apparently they're 5th-level Cure Wounds.

TRAVIS: It's 34 points.

MATT: So you're at 35 hit points.

TALIESIN: Yay.

LAURA: Great.

ASHLEY: I take Beau in for a big hug and cast Healing Hands for 15.

TRAVIS: Right there in D&D Beyond.

MARISHA: I just take a deep breath and breathe her in.

ASHLEY: I kiss her on the top of her head.

MARISHA: Just bury my head in her chest just a little.

LAURA: And Plane Shift can take up to nine people. Okay.

TALIESIN: You and eight friends.

LAURA: Well, I've also got Sprinkle.

TALIESIN: Sprinkle will probably have to be left behind.

SAM: Does Sprinkle count?

LAURA: Does Sprinkle count?

SAM: I don't think so.

MATT: Sprinkle is considered an accessory.

LAURA: Okay, that's great, that's good, that's good.

TRAVIS: (as Sprinkle) An accessory? (laughter)

TRAVIS: (as Sprinkle) The fuck you say, bitch? (laughter)

LAURA: You've got the tuning fork for Exandria and I've got the tuning fork for the Astral Sea.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

LAURA: Okay, so you don't need mine anymore.

TALIESIN: Not for awhile, hopefully, no.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Have we decided where we're going?

MARISHA: I guess The Blooming Grove.

SAM: Jester, do you want to quickly just draw a big dick here before we leave?

LAURA: That's a really good idea.

SAM: I mean.

LIAM: I mean, you kind of did, but--

LAURA: Yeah, you know what, though?

LIAM: Maybe something that will last.

LAURA: I'm just going to go over to the big pillar and--

TRAVIS: A big egg dick?

LAURA: Yeah, I'm just going to paint it to make it look like a dick forever. Until it is no longer standing.

MATT: It's unique to be able to just fly up, wheel yourself around it and paint free form as you coast around it as an untethered free spirit of art and expression. And within a few moments, you have masterfully shaded it to look like a big old donger.

LAURA: And then I'm going to, at the very top of it, draw a big Captain Tusktooth.

MATT: (laughs) Right on the (clicks tongue).

MATT: You got it.

TRAVIS: Branding.

LAURA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Multi-dimensional branding.

LAURA: (laughs)

MATT: Essek actually walks up to you, Caduceus, as you're getting ready and says, "See? There's always a way."

TALIESIN: I'm impressed.

MATT: "No, if anyone has been impressed with this, it's me."

TALIESIN: I think you have a bright future ahead of you.

MATT: "Of course."

TALIESIN: You did well. You take the blame. You should take the credit, too.

MATT: "I do. I'm glad I did it."

TALIESIN: I think you're going to save a lot of people. You already have. Think you have a good life ahead of you.

MATT: Puts his hand on your shoulder and says, "I hope you're right."

TALIESIN: And if not, I'm sure the rest of them will hunt you down and that'll be the end of that, but.

MATT: "Not that far off."

TALIESIN: And you're always welcome in my house.

MATT: "Thank you."

TALIESIN: Your home or mine?

LAURA: Let's go to yours.

TALIESIN: All right. Everybody?

LAURA: (laughs)

TRAVIS: Yeah, this shit. Makes a circuit. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Hey look, there's nine.

TALIESIN: Commit this city to the air. (whoosh) We're out.

LAURA: We finally got nine. Like nine, really nine-nine!

MATT: That's crazy.

LIAM: ♪ We built this city ♪

MARISHA: ♪ Do, do, do, do ♪

MATT: With that flash of energy, you are all pulled from the Astral Sea away from the now dead city of Cognouza. Its long-standing, terrifying tragedy concluded. And we'll end tonight's episode there.

TRAVIS: That is the most unbelievable--

MATT: I can't believe that shit!

TRAVIS: The most unbelievable pinball turn of events.

LIAM: There's no reason why that should have worked.

MATT: That should not have worked!

TALIESIN: New dice!

TRAVIS: Never.

TALIESIN: New dice!

MARISHA: You rolled one.

MATT: I was literally going, "Oh, man, okay."

TRAVIS: One on the map.

MATT: I mean, I was like--

TALIESIN: I used my fancy new ones.

MATT: I was legitimately going-- That was like--

TALIESIN: I would have been--

MATT: Sad, but also a beautiful, appropriate story. Like that would have been--

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: In my head, I was like, there are a lot of wonderful things that came out of this. It'll bittersweet, but also-- Or you just roll a fucking two.

TALIESIN: But you know, the interesting thing is it allows me to actually finally-- because there's so much stuff about him as a-- like, the notion of that character that I can now actually kind of--

MATT: I was hoping something like this might happen. If you guys went through the path, this was definitely something that could happen.

LIAM: Congratulations, Taliesin's character saved Taliesin's character.

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: I know! (laughs)

TRAVIS: What the fuck?

TALIESIN: Well, you know.

TRAVIS: It was a trippy moment, right before you started talking that I was like, "Oh, it's been since before our son was born that you talked that way last."

TALIESIN: Oh, yeah, it's been a while.

LIAM: Over 100 episodes.

TALIESIN: (as Mollymauk) Quietly at home, I keep fucking with it.

SAM: Just in case.

TALIESIN: Just in case.

MARISHA: You guys were gone, yeah.

TRAVIS: I guess we don't have to kill Ronin anymore.

LAURA: Yeah.

MARISHA: Yeah.

LIAM: Or Burch.

MARISHA: His soul can live on.

TRAVIS: Yeah, or Burch.

MARISHA: (laughs)

TRAVIS: She keeps getting shit.

MARISHA: Someone call Burch.

TALIESIN: We'll have that conversation.

MARISHA: You're off the hook.

SAM: Somewhere, right now, she's like, "Oh, fucking thank god!" (laughter)

LIAM: From the Astral Sea.

TRAVIS: Her Twitter feed is going to explode. (laughs)

MATT: Oh my god.

MARISHA: I can just hear her going "Thank you!" (laughter)

MATT: But also, once again, what an amazing story came out of that.

TALIESIN: Right!

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: Up even to this moment, fuck.

MARISHA: What did we have to roll over, a 10? On the map?

MATT: No, because one of those didn't quite make it. So it would've been, it would've been three, three, and then one. So it would've been-- Sorry, three-- No, it would've been over five to get it.

LAURA: Oh, wow.

MATT: There were two successes.

LAURA: So that natural one was just like the worst.

LIAM: Yeah, that the nail on the coffin.

MATT: Yeah, and part of me was like, "If he rolled a 2% and I roll under a five again, then it was meant to be." But fuck. Fuck.

TALIESIN: "If I get this, that means I can probably do this anyway I like." Okay, let's just see what happens.

MATT: Yeah, I wasn't going to give it to you. I can't just give you a True Resurrection spell. But I was like, I'll give another reroll.

TRAVIS: Were you like debating whether or not to try it?

TALIESIN: Yep.

LAURA: Oh my god.

TALIESIN: And then the chaos gremlin in me is--

MATT: Yes!

TRAVIS: We had minutes before.

LAURA: Yeah, he would've been in the stones.

TALIESIN: I was like, "Fuck, it's a d100." I mean, that's hilarious.

MATT: What are the chances?

TALIESIN: Yeah. The d100's hilarious.

TRAVIS: The math is literally-- yeah.

LIAM: Yep.

ASHLEY: Oh my god.

MATT: Well!

LIAM: Odds are 15 out of 100.

MATT: We'll pick up from there next week. Arrival at the Blooming Grove. And to I guess whatever will be the next, possibly final wave of this campaign.

LAURA: Oh my god.

LIAM: Oh boy.

MATT: After three-plus years. Well, we'll pick it up there. Thank you so much for joining us. We love you very much. And is it Thursday yet?

LIAM: No.

MATT: Good night.

TRAVIS: We're alive!