Transcript:The City of Flowing Light

Pre-show
MATT: Hello, everyone, and welcome to tonight's episode of Critical Role, where a bunch of us nerdy-ass voice actors sit around and play Dungeons & Dragons.

ALL: (silly voices) We play Dungeons & Dragons!

MATT: Every fucking time. (laughs) Before we get into our episode tonight, we do have a quick series of announcements to get through, beginning with our first sponsor, which is Cash App. Vince McSam?

SAM: Not me, Matt! Since I tricked the Finger Ladies Of Wrestling, the FLOW, into signing this eternal contract with me, I think I'll have them read the ad copy. Finger Blaster, be a dear and take care of it for me.

MARISHA: I didn't agree to this.

SAM: You did, though. Isn't this your signature?

MARISHA: Fine. (intensely) We're back, the Finger Championship Games, brought to you by Cash App, the easiest way to spend, send, and save money! It's the number one finance app in the App Store, helping you invest in stocks with as little as $1.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MARISHA: And connect your-- connect your direct deposit and get paid two days early!

(growling, laughter)

SAM: Don't forget to say their catchphrase!

MARISHA: (scoffs) Oh my god. (intensely) That's money!

SAM: Delightful. Delightful. Now you, High Five, was it? Make me a ham sandwich.

ASHLEY: I'd rather rip out my fingernails than do your bidding, sir.

(laughter)

SAM: Interesting read on that line.

ASHLEY: That's what I went with. Deal with it.

SAM: And what about you?

LAURA: I'm The Thumb.

SAM: Yep. That's nice. But if you three don't abide by our deal, I'm afraid you'll never wrestle again.

MARISHA: Fuck this! You can't enforce the contract, if you're going to get-- You're going to get knocked out!

SAM: What, me?

MARISHA: Let's give him a beat down, girls!

SAM: Oh, I don't think so! Finger magic!

(magic sounds)

LAURA: What the thumb?

ASHLEY: Where'd he go?

SAM: Ho ho ho, they seem mad, but it looks like they won't be pummeling me today. Ah, how wonderful. Relaxing by the fire, using Cash App. You know you can download Cash App from the App Store or Google Play Store today to create your own Cash Tag. You can share your Cash Tag with friends and use Cash App to send payments with ease.

ASHLEY: Well, how did he do that?

MARISHA: He can't stay away forever. And when he returns, we'll be ready.

LAURA: (deeply) Thumb.

MARISHA: Yeah, we still need to work on that one.

LAURA: I know.

MARISHA: It's pretty rough.

ASHLEY: High Five.

SAM: We'll see about that, ladies. This is a dog. Until then, this is the life, and that's money. Matt, back to you. Oh, yes, you're so-- Pretty dog.

(lightning strikes)

MATT: Thank you, Vince McSam. And our second sponsor for tonight is D&D Beyond. If you need an easy gift to give your favorite DM this year or have a kobold who seems to have everything, give the gift of D&D with D&D Beyond. Sending a book has never been easier. Simply buy a book as a gift at checkout and send your friend a code. No unnecessary trips to the crowded post office and your friends get the book immediately. Check it out right now at dndbeyond.link/crshop.

MARISHA: (intensely) D&D Beyond!

LAURA: ♪ D&D Beyond! ♪

MATT: Oh god! We're crossing the ad streams!

TRAVIS: Oh boy.

MATT: So, next up, there's no other next up, that's the end of our announcements. So that means it's time for us to jump into tonight's episode of Critical Role. (wind rushing)

Part I
(laughter)

ASHLEY: Uh-oh.

SAM: What is so funny right now?

(laughter)

MATT: And welcome back, children.

(laughter)

TRAVIS: Adults. Professionals.

(laughter)

TRAVIS: Dead serious.

MATT: Last we left off-- (laughs) Bells Hells, heading southward on the continent of Marquet via the skyship that they received, bequeathed to them at the death of their dear friend, Lord Ariks Eshteross. Went across the Hellcatch Valley, encountered a few challenges, delved into the Gloomed Jungles of Aeshanadoor, where they encountered, after seeking them, the Gorgynei, in hopes of helping Chetney not just learn more about his journey as a blood hunter, but to possibly find a way to curb this newfound tethered murderous urge brought on by the flares of Ruidus. After meeting the troop, and brought to their village of Barinak, you were told the safer route for the time schedule that you're on, would be to go to the Temple of the Savage Spirit of the forest, and beseech them for guidance, and perhaps a trial. There, you went ahead and found this long-forgotten temple. You sat there in quiet reverie and meditation, whatever that looks like for Chetney. If that really was very quiet, who knows? But while the rest of you watched, the spirit did indeed reach out to you just as the moonlight began to peek through sourcelessly. Upon narrowing its attention on what it thought you were and could become, it possessed you. While the rest of the Gorgynei watched, Chetney, in his wolven form, swelled to a massive size and attacked you. Unleashed, wolven Chetney, a savage beast, smelling and hungry for blood, went after each and every one of you. As you battled, eventually managing to quell the beast within through a series of quick thinking, quick spells, and your friendship reaching beyond the boundaries of this fanatic nature within. And of course blocking the moonlight from the top of the chamber, which seemed to be the tether to this ability.

SAM: Smart. Smart.

MATT: His form diminished, and his brain, his mind was recaptured. In those moments of consideration of the trial, the Gorgynei congratulated you. The spirit seemed to leave. With this newfound experience, most of you stripped off your clothing, and ran streaking into the moonlight.

MARISHA: Hey.

MATT: During which, as you were about to leave, you smelled the familiar scent of your late husband, and turned towards the statue that was in the center of this chamber. Through some strange gift of the Wildmother and her connection to his life or yours, you were given the opportunity to give your blade over to her essence, and then retrieved it, changed, improved. Holding this blade in your hand, you rushed out to join the rest of your teammates into the evening chaos. That's where we left off. Is there anything in particular you want to do while you're streaking in the moonlight?

(laughs)

SAM: Hmm. Can you describe their flesh, as they're running through the forest?

TRAVIS: In vivid detail?

SAM: Yes.

MATT: You get a long rest (laughter) after a night of restful sleep.

TRAVIS: A long rest for a long-- Never mind.

(laughter)

MATT: We'll say after an evening of revelry and exhaustion, both hand in hand, eventually, morning does come to greet you. The fog of the Gloomed Forest around you, the smells of fungus and dew, rotting earth, fresh vegetation, and the possibility of new morning greet you as you all wake up a bit tense, a bit bruised. But nevertheless, the day is yours. The rest of the Gorgynei have already gathered their materials. You can see they leave one final offerings to the temple within, a few fruits, a few other coins, whatever they want to gift on to the entity of the spirit within the temple.

SAM: I feel like I'm in the Rainforest Cafe right now.

MATT: Yeah. (laughs) But, for you guys, what would you like to do?

TRAVIS: Oh, I feel so invigorated. Like I'm a brand new wolf. It's the best. I'm 200 years younger all over again.

MARISHA: You don't look it.

TRAVIS: That's fucked up. You could have held the illusion for one second.

MARISHA: Sorry.

TRAVIS: Let me ride with it. It's okay.

MARISHA: It's just sometimes it's the first thing that comes--

TRAVIS: There's not even any mirrors around.

MARISHA: -- out of my head.

TRAVIS: Fuck.

TALIESIN: It was perfection, I don't want to--

MARISHA: Well, what do we do next? Do you feel like you have more control in the moment?

TRAVIS: No, not anymore. I guess I just have memory loss. I'm just all senile now.

MARISHA: Well, I thought that was--

SAM: Don't let her get to you, Chetney. This is an amazing achievement. She's probably just a little cranky, because she was dead a couple days ago.

TRAVIS: Oh, that's true. I should have consideration.

SAM: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Put myself in other people's shoes.

SAM: Put yourself in other people's dead shoes. Yeah.

TRAVIS: FCG, that is so wise. You're right. You're absolutely right. I'm sorry, Laudna.

MARISHA: Do you want to try my shoes on?

TRAVIS: Hm?

MARISHA: I bet they'd look cute on you, actually.

TRAVIS: Do you have very small feet?

MARISHA: Mm. I don't know. Compared to you, I don't know.

TRAVIS: I got big some feet.

SAM: How big are your feet? Yeah.

TRAVIS: Oh yeah. The curls on the shoes, that's where my toes go.

SAM: Oh, those are actual toes?

TRAVIS: Yeah, it took me 250 years to cultivate and grow.

SAM: Wow. It's not a toenail? It's your actual--

TRAVIS: One way to find out.

SAM: Wow.

ASHLEY: Take off your shoes.

TRAVIS: No, they're already off. I just bury my toes in the dirt every time we stop. It's like running around in scuba fins.

(laughter)

MARISHA: Oh god.

(laughter)

MARISHA: No.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

LAURA: Are you officially a member of the Gorgynei now?

MATT: At this point, you hear the throat clearing from not too far from you. "(clears throat)" You see Annaline is sitting up in one of the rocks, and is currently finishing putting on the rest her leather armor for the morning's journey. "I mean you've always been a member of the orders, obviously. If you want to be a member of the Gorgynei, you maybe have to come back and train with us for more than a few days. But you're certainly an ally and on a path. It looks like the evening's trial was as effective as any of us could have hoped. I feel like it was less for you, and more for your compatriots to know what they're dealing with. Understand when someone carries something dark within them that they have a hard time fighting, sometimes the responsibility lies on those who are closest to them to know how to guide them, and work with the challenge they carry. So, I'd say you all passed the trial. At least you will, if you remember this and keep these lessons in mind." Finishes strapping on her bracer and picks up the short bow. Grabs the hammer to the side as Annaline looks over and gives a quick whistle. You watch as some of the other Gorgynei who escorted you begin to pull out of the nearby bushes. You see Manad has, looks to be some sort of an odd forest rabbit, but it has these long curled horns that come out of the front of its mouth. Its back legs have these heavy claws. Just hanging as he drags it behind.

MARISHA: Is it a wererabbit?

MATT: (Manad) "It's not a wererabbit. It's a breakfast rabbit." Throws it over to you.

MARISHA: (grunts)

(laughter)

MATT: "I thought you'd catch it. I didn't. I'm sorry. I didn't--"

TRAVIS: What the hell?

SAM: The rabbit just hit you in the face.

(laughter)

MATT: "I feel like shit. I'm going to--"

(laughter)

TRAVIS: That was the thought?

MARISHA: Do I look like the one that catches things?

MATT: "You're right. That's on me. I'm going to--" Manad just walks off into the forest, super embarrassed.

SAM: He's the hot one.

LAURA: Thanks for the rabbit.

TALIESIN: We're learning too many lessons too quickly. I think we should just take it a little more slowly this morning.

LIAM: I haven't eaten in 30 years.

TALIESIN: Yes.

TRAVIS: I should thank all of you. I've never had to be accountable to anybody. It's a great feeling knowing that you all were looking out for me at the same time. I won't let you down. I'll give it my best, I promise. Put it to use in a good way. But, you know, when the wolf comes out, maybe just little bit of a wide berth. Unless you're down with that.

SAM: So it still could come out?

TALIESIN: Very down with it.

TRAVIS: Yeah, I mean-- I mean, yeah. I think it's something that I'll always have to just-- I'll always be a wolf. It'll always be a point where it could go too far.

LIAM: We'll keep you in check.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MARISHA: Should we have a code word or something when you get too hungry?

TRAVIS: Yes, yes.

TALIESIN: "Holy fuck, he's freaking out," is usually, I think--

TRAVIS: A code word or some hand gestures. I'm game for either, or.

LIAM: Like hitting you in the face?

TALIESIN: I'll hit him with a hammer.

TRAVIS: No, I meant to signal the rest of the team.

LAURA: That you're getting too--

ASHLEY: That you have to give out, right?

SAM: That you're going to kill us?

ASHLEY: When you feel like you're losing yourself a little bit.

TRAVIS: Yeah yeah. I'll figure something out.

SAM: All right.

LAURA: All right.

TRAVIS: If it starts getting a little ornery, it starts getting a little much, and not the other kind of itch, I'll give you a signal.

LIAM: So far your signal has been tearing me open.

LAURA: Yeah.

LIAM: Can we get one earlier?

TRAVIS: Yeah. Yeah, yeah yeah. I'll get you a little, you know, when the theaters dim the lights. You ever been to the theater?

SAM: Yeah, we all have membership cards to a theater.

ASHLEY: We did, we did. We went to the one theater.

MARISHA: I'd like to go back.

ASHLEY: It was a great show.

LAURA: It was wonderful.

TRAVIS: I don't get it. You sit in a big-ass room and watch people act stupid. Okay.

LIAM: We went to the theater just before we met you, actually.

TALIESIN: That's true.

TRAVIS: Yeah, I was waiting outside. You wouldn't catch me dead inside there.

TALIESIN: I didn't know you had a thing against theaters.

MARISHA: I think we get plus ones with our memberships, actually, if you ever want to--

LAURA: Go back.

MARISHA: -- give it a try.

TRAVIS: Oh. Okay, I'll keep it in mind.

ASHLEY: Are you afraid of the theater?

TRAVIS: Afraid? No. I tend to fall asleep.

ASHLEY: Oh, yeah.

LAURA: Oh.

TRAVIS: Then I have a glottal-- I'm a very loud snorer.

LAURA: Yeah, we know.

TALIESIN: We know.

TRAVIS: I've been twice and kicked out twice.

LIAM: That's probably just your age. If you go to any matinee, it's like a whole sea.

TRAVIS: I mean, seriously. It feels like they're not even trying, Half the cast have changed. There are all these flyers in the pamphlet. I couldn't track anything.

ASHLEY: You know, that could, the sleepiness could just be the result of a boring show. If we saw something really impressive--

TRAVIS: Riveting?

ASLEY: Yeah. That would keep you awake.

TALIESIN: Loud. Very loud.

TRAVIS: We'll see. I have a very discerning palette for theater. (laughs)

ASHLEY: I could tell. I could tell.

LAURA: I wonder if I can send a message to the captain and have them bring the ship our direction--

SAM: Meet us here?

LAURA: Yeah, so that we don't have to waste as many days traveling back.

TRAVIS: Although we probably need to go up, and get a little above the tree elevation, right? One of the towers?

LIAM: Right. Is this structure sort of hidden away in the trees, or is there...?

LAURA: We're on a cliff side, right?

MATT: It's a cliff side that kind of-- There's a number of hills that punch up. The jungle moves with it. There is a minor clearing here, but there are a number of those pockets. You would probably have to find some way to flag them down, so they knew where to go. You can give them a basic direction. They can try and find you, but it isn't a-- Isn't a very easy to spot location unless you have an idea of how to make it stand out.

LIAM: Can't you just go up and make a little flash bang in the sky?

LAURA: Yeah, like a little fireworks display.

MATT: Give it a shot.

SAM: But we're like a day away from them. They won't see it.

LAURA: Well, they could get here a lot faster than a day, right?

MATT: Yeah.

SAM: But would they see it from where they are?

LAURA: I could send them a message and let them know.

SAM: sure.

MATT: You guys are about a day and a half to two days from Barinak. That's about a half day to where you left the ship.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: So if you were to send the ship your way, at the speed of travel, it would get to you in under a day.

SAM: Great. Let's do it.

LAURA: Which would be great.

LAURA: All right, yeah. Then I'm going to send a message.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: And give them-- How would I give them directions to this area?

SAM: Do we have it?

LAURA: I would be able to--

SAM: Are any of the Gorgynei around to--?

MATT: Yeah, I mean they're all around. Other than Manad who just came back.

TRAVIS: Gor-GEE-nei.

SAM: Gór-gin-ey.

TALIESIN: They would know how far and what direction we were from the drop off point.

MATT: Vaguely.

TALIESIN: I assume. I don't know.

LIAM: Captain Xandis.

LAURA: Xandis.

MATT: Annaline lets you know, "From where we picked you up, initially the evening it's a bit west-northwest of where we are now. As far as landmarks go, there is a-- There's a heavy red patch of tree cover a little ways to the west of where we currently stand That might be visible from the sky. If they just travel due west, west and a bit south. Sorry, east. East and a bit south from where they are."

SAM: Do you know where we are?

(laughter)

TALIESIN: There were a lot of directions--

MATT: "It's been a long night, and I've been-- Already day drink." No.

LAURA: (laughs) South and a bit east of where they are now.

MATT: East and a bit south.

LAURA: East and a bit south of where they are now. This is going to go well.

TALIESIN: We can throw up a flare every now and there.

LAURA: I'm going to quickly--

SAM: But also a little west.

LIAM: Northwest.

LAURA: Shhh, stop it. South. No, east and a bit south. God. Okay, here we go. I'm going to send a message to Xandis.

LIAM: Criss-cross.

LAURA: Y'all can come pick us up. We're east and a bit south. About half a day's journey from you.

SAM: Red trees, red trees, red trees.

LAURA: Big patch of red trees. I'll send a flare.

SAM: I'll send a--

TRAVIS: I'll send a--

ASHLEY: I'll send a flare.

LIAM: ♪ Send me an angel ♪

TALIESIN: They'll know what she meant.

MATT: (Xandis) "Oh, good morning. I, okay. Good to know that. We'll start heading that direction, and look for the red trees, I guess." That's it.

LAURA: All right. That seems like they'll definitely find us.

MARISHA: (laughs) Incredible.

LAURA: What?

SAM: I just read the very official contract prop. All it says is "balls and titties."

(laughter)

SAM: A thousand times.

(laughter)

SAM: Good prop making.

TRAVIS: Don't let them behind the curtain. They can't know this is what fuels us.

LAURA: Very official contract.

SAM: "Balls and titties, balls and titties. Titties and ass, titties and ass. Balls and titties."

(laughter)

LIAM: There are no other written words in the building besides that.

MARISHA: That's kind of true.

ASHLEY: They're the best.

MATT: We are adults.

(laughter)

TRAVIS: Somehow.

MATT: All right.

LIAM: So we just kill some time 'til they get here?

LAURA: Sure.

SAM: Sure.

MATT: Manad eventually comes back with a couple more of the jungle rabbits and a breakfast meal is shared as he kind of sits down.

SAM: Are they going to cook them?

MATT: Yeah, they cook them.

TRAVIS: Throw them in Laudna's face.

SAM: I'm going to watch them cook. I want to learn. I want to learn how to cook. I can't eat, but I want to learn how to cook.

MATT: Manad's like, "All right, well pay attention. You got yourself a small blade? Teach you how to clean it."

SAM: (spins buzzsaw)

MATT: "All right, yeah. Just make sure you point it away."

SAM: Sure.

TRAVIS: Is that the buzz saw?

SAM: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Oh boy.

SAM: It's rusty a little bit.

(laughter)

MARISHA: There's no rabbit left.

TALIESIN: This is a good hobby. Yeah, maybe some better-- Got to get you some tools.

SAM: Sure.

TALIESIN: I mean, I'm excited. This is good. This is good for you.

MATT: Manad shows you the process of skinning your prey and preparing it for cooking and managing to cook it over a fire and how best to remove the unnecessary parts of its innards, preparing the meat for food. Something that you're not too familiar with, nevertheless. But yeah, the process is easy enough to pick up.

MARISHA: Can I have its heart?

SAM: Oh.

SAM: Is that what that is?

MARISHA: Yes.

SAM: A little nubbin?

MARISHA: Yes.

LIAM: Throw it in her face.

SAM: There you go!

TALIESIN: Why you think that that's its heart?

MARISHA: I get out Pâté, and I shove it in his ribs.

SAM and MATT: (laugh)

MARISHA: There you go, buddy.

MATT: (Pâté) "Oh, that just woke me right up, didn't it?"

MARISHA: I just want to know, I don't know if you have one, so I thought maybe you'd want one.

MATT: "Well, let's give it a shot. (grunts)"

MARISHA: Does it work?

MATT: It just falls out and he's like, "Well, it was worth a shot, right? (laughs)"

MARISHA: We'll work on it.

MATT: "No! (grunts)"

TRAVIS: He's going to smell really, really bad.

MATT: "It kind of tickles. Ooh."

(laughter)

TALIESIN: I know. I know.

MATT: "(groans)"

TRAVIS: As FCG cooks and cleans, do his eyes flash red at any point in the process?

MATT: Make a perception check.

TRAVIS: You fucking--

SAM: The blood on my hands.

LAURA: Oh.

TRAVIS: Ooh, it was almost a one. A 15.

MATT: 15. You notice partway through the process of him helping clean one of these creatures that nothing changes.

TRAVIS: Should've rolled higher.

MATT and TALIESIN: (laugh)

LAURA: I don't know. It looks like something's changing.

MARISHA: What are you stroking?

TRAVIS: The meat tongue.

SAM: I'm pulling off the skin.

LAURA: (laughing) Oh god!

ASHLEY: That's not quite--

SAM: I'm pulling out the tongue of the rabbit. (laughter) Do rabbits have tongues? They must have tongues.

TRAVIS: Sure.

MARISHA: Yeah.

LAURA: Yeah, they've got to have tongues.

SAM: Tiny little tongues?

LIAM: Do you want to sew that onto the end of your big one?

LAURA: That's so fucked up.

SAM: My actual tongue?

LAURA: What is happening?

LIAM: Yeah. Like a tongue chain with time?

TALIESIN: I hate all of this.

LIAM: Orym is going to move off a ways from the group and he--

LAURA: I'm going to move away from--

LIAM: He leaves. Orym just leaves.

MATT: He's done.

TALIESIN: Good call.

LIAM: I tried. He goes off to the side and begins to move through the steps of the Zeph'aeratam with this new blade and gets to know it for a while. He starts slow and then it gets quicker and quicker. At a certain point, his shield hand, he points it out at a small log on the ground, and a vine shoots out Spider-Man style to the log.

SAM: What?

LIAM: He yanks it into the air and then slashes with a blade. Even though the log is 20 feet in the air, it gets cut in half as soon as Orym swings.

ASHLEY: No way.

TRAVIS: Boy got reach.

LIAM: Boy got reach.

TRAVIS: Damn!

ASHLEY: Oh!

LIAM: He just quietly is smiling at his god-blessed blade.

TRAVIS: 20, 30 feet.

MATT: 15 feet.

LAURA: He's got how far of a reach?

MATT: 15 feet.

TRAVIS: 40 feet.

LAURA: 15.

LIAM: Is it? I thought it was 20.

LAURA: 75 feet.

MATT: The vine is 20.

MARISHA: Oh my god.

LIAM: Oh okay. Oh, is it different than the spell itself?

TRAVIS: You were in Eiselcross?

MATT: Correct.

LIAM: It is. Thanks.

ASHLEY: (laughs)

LAURA: Oh.

LIAM: Okay. That's great.

MARISHA: I tip toe over to Fearne.

MATT: Which for the record, yeah, you all notice this cool blade, so.

SAM: Awesome.

MARISHA: Your blade is cool.

LIAM: Thanks!

MARISHA: Fearne?

ASHLEY: Yes?

MARISHA: I was thinking about it, and while I'm good at being creepy and deceiving--

ASHLEY: The best.

MARISHA: -- and I've got a little bit of little sniper shots. I don't really have anything that can go boom and target a bunch of people all at once! So, I don't know, I'm just wondering if maybe you could... I wouldn't mind learning to play with a little bit of fire, maybe.

ASHLEY: (gasps) Oh, I would absolutely love to help with that.

MARISHA: Yes?

ASHLEY: Yes. Okay. Ooh, this gives me a bit of a project.

MARISHA: Okay. Yes, we can work on it over time.

ASHLEY: I love this idea. I love this. I think you're going to be amazing at it. I think, aesthetically, it's going to be very cool.

MARISHA: You think so?

ASHLEY: Yes.

MARISHA: All right.

ASHLEY: Definitely will add to it.

MARISHA: Okay.

ASHLEY: I'm excited about this.

MARISHA: Oh, me too.

ASHLEY: How's it feel being alive again? I'm sorry, I just jumped right in.

MARISHA: No, you did.

ASHLEY: I didn't know that that was coming out.

MARISHA: That was very light and jovial, and then that just swerved.

ASHLEY: I was trying to just get it in real quick.

MARISHA: No, it feels incredible, and I'm still, of course, grappling with the such extreme lengths you all went to to get me back, but I'm still not entirely sure if there's still a piece of Delilah lingering in there and--

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MARISHA: I don't know. There's certain things I'm still unsure of. I'm not easily afraid of things, but I'm still kind of afraid of myself.

ASHLEY: Oh. I understand that feeling. Sometimes it goes well and other times it's like, oh, oops.

MARISHA: Yes.

ASHLEY: That's awful. I didn't like that woman very much. I think we can all do whatever we can to keep her away, if the little bit of her is still there. We can try, but I think you fought her pretty well from the inside.

MARISHA: I couldn't have done it without all of you. Perhaps it's a bit like what Annaline was talking about with Chetney, and we just all have to know how to work with each other's strengths and limitations.

ASHLEY: Yeah. I feel pretty terrible that I flipped a coin for your lives. I'm sorry. I didn't want to make the decision myself and then it felt so flippant and terrible.

MARISHA: And that was more of a Changebringer's choice? Well, let's blame it on a god.

ASHLEY: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

MARISHA: Regardless, I support the decision.

ASHLEY: Okay. Well, I'm very glad you're back.

MARISHA: Me too.

ASHLEY: I missed you terribly for that moment of time.

MARISHA: It seemed like so long, yet I know it was not that long in the grand scheme of things.

ASHLEY: Well, I'll think of some ideas.

MARISHA: Okay.

ASHLEY: We'll just make it fun-dangerous.

MARISHA: I love it.

ASHLEY: Maybe a little chaotic, maybe a little bad-dangerous, but we'll see what happens.

MATT: Okay. So while the two of you are discussing the possible untethered dangers of fire in all of its wondrous, pyromaniacal deadliness--

LIAM: It's like Beavis and Butt-Head.

MATT: Yeah, straight up.

MARISHA and LIAM: (Beavis and Butt-Head laugh)

ASHLEY: It's true.

ASHLEY: (as Beavis) Fire.

LIAM: (as Beavis) Fire, fire!

MATT: I love them so much. The new stuff's great. Anyway. While that's happening, Uther, the older male Gorgynei who kept to the back of most of your traveling paths, sees you practicing with your sword and walks up and goes, "That's a real fine weapon you got there. Your technique is something I haven't seen before."

LIAM: Yeah, it's old and new.

MATT: "What do you call it?"

LIAM: Boy, my... husband gave me this sword and my father gave me this shield. Never thought to name them.

MATT: "Well, if they mean that much to you, you should name them."

LIAM: Well, if the gods take on us, yeah.

MATT: "Well." He pulls out a long blade that he has at his side and turns it over in his arm. "This?"

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: "The Jaw Taker."

LIAM: The Jaw Taker?

MATT: "Named because the person that I stole it from, I cut his jaw off with it."

LIAM: Oh, so it's not like a habit, you don't collect jaws?

MATT: "No, that would be--"

LIAM: Yeah, macabre.

MATT: "Just the one time."

LIAM: The one time.

MATT: "It seemed poetic."

LIAM: It's intimidating.

MATT: "Is it? Should I change it?"

LIAM: No!

MATT: "Okay."

LAURA: (laughs)

MATT: "I never... Hmm." Puts it away.

LIAM: No, no. Are you a rough and tumble brawler, or--?

MATT: "When I was younger, maybe."

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: "Nowadays, just, I don't know, try to do my best to help the kids out before I run out of steam."

LIAM: Where you hail from?

MATT: "Oh, well, I was originally part of the Claret Orders up in Wildemount, a while back, wandering the Savalirwood."

LIAM: Never been.

MATT: "It's colder, much colder. Though, oddly, the jungles here have a familiar shadow to them, so that's nice. A little part of home, but with a better weather pattern."

LIAM: I get that. I get the traveler life.

MATT: "It's nice to have a home finally after traveling for a long time. I hope you and your friends don't travel too long and you all get to find a home, too. Or return to what you got."

LIAM: I'll think of a name.

MATT: "Do that." He pulls out his sword again. "I like Blood Splash. I don't know." He walks off, just muttering to himself.

LIAM: It's a good name.

ASHLEY: Blood Splash.

MARISHA: Blood Splash.

TRAVIS: That was Uther?

MATT: That was Uther, yeah.

TALIESIN: That's the thing. You take one job on and then you just start getting gifted them all the time.

TRAVIS: The wereboar?

MATT: The wereboar, yeah.

TALIESIN: You're the jawbone person, and--

LIAM: Yeah.

TALIESIN: It's just, didn't ask for it.

MATT: So the skyship begins to become visible on the horizon.

LAURA: Oh!

MATT: After you've been here for a bit. Unless there's any business you want to maintain while you're here. Now, have you guys have been practicing this whole time? Is it something you wanted to pick up?

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MARISHA: Sure.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MATT: What'd you do?

TRAVIS: We're in the forest. So, you know.

LAURA: (laughs)

MARISHA: It's a jungle, it's wet.

SAM: Yeah, it's wet.

ASHLEY: Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's all right. Let's see.

MARISHA: Let's start small.

ASHLEY: Just start small? Okay.

MARISHA: How do I manifest?

ASHLEY: So, usually, what I do--

MARISHA: All right.

ASHLEY: I just rub my fingers together.

MARISHA: Okay.

ASHLEY: It gets real hot. Then in my head, I just--

MARISHA: I don't have good circulation. They're a little cold.

ASHLEY: That's right. Well don't-- Oh, you're flaking a little bit. Some pieces are coming off.

MARISHA: It's been-- The jungle's not been good for the--

ASHLEY: So just maybe do this little action.

MARISHA: All right.

ASHLEY: Then think fire in your head, like see it, see the big flame, just ready to fucking burn shit. Then you blow it out to your fingertips, and then you should get some fire. Just a little start.

MARISHA: All right. All right. Okay. Oh my god. I'm so nervous. All right.

ASHLEY: You got this. You got this.

MARISHA: Don't look at me.

ASHLEY: You want me to look away?

MARISHA: No, look at me. Look at me. I need to--

ASHLEY: I could probably hear-- I could see the--

MARISHA: Okay.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MARISHA: All right.

MATT: Where are you looking?

MARISHA: Well, I was looking at my fingers--

TRAVIS: That batch of dry leaves over there.

MARISHA: Yeah. Base of a tree.

LIAM: Just Chetney whittling a log.

MATT: (laughs)

TRAVIS: Ah, peace.

MARISHA: A little bit to the left of where Orym was practicing.

ASHLEY: I have an idea. I have an idea. If it's not too late.

MARISHA: Yes?

ASHLEY: Maybe you just try it at me.

LAURA: Oh!

SAM: Oh boy.

MARISHA: All right.

ASHLEY: I can just-- It's fine.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

ASHLEY: I can take it, because it's just a little heat. I can take a little heat.

MARISHA: Well, you're fire especially, right?

ASHLEY: I'll close my eyes.

MARISHA: Can you maybe catch it?

ASHLEY: I've never tried.

MATT: "(monkey hoots)"

ASHLEY: Let me see if I can try.

MATT: Mister climbs on your shoulder and goes like, "(monkey hooting)" Gets excitement in his eyes.

ASHLEY: Yeah, you get it.

MARISHA: He's into it?

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MARISHA: Is it all right? What if I hit Mister?

ASHLEY: It's fine.

MATT: He ignites in flames

ASHLEY: It'll just give him a little more.

MARISHA: You're such an inspiration. Oh my god! Okay. I'm going to think about Mister.

ASHLEY: Okay, I'm going to try to think about catching it.

MATT: (laughs) As you imagine in your head this small flicker, the start of a match, the crackle of a fire as it begins to burn into a furnace and inferno, a raging forest fire, a molten volcano eruption, all the elemental imagery of what fire means in the history of Exandria.

ASHLEY: Feel the heat in your body.

MARISHA: Yes.

MATT: As you blow, you open your eyes just in time to see the very tips where the connections of your fingers are there's this faint orange glow between them. As you separate them slightly, all those little tips of glow fit into one small little bead, and you blow it and it drifts like a fast moving mote on the wind--

MARISHA: It was tiny.

TRAVIS: Oh, it's okay.

MATT: -- over towards you, Fearne.

ASHLEY: Oh my--

MARISHA: It's a little one.

ASHLEY: Oh. Mister? Just grab it?

MATT: "(monkey hoots)" He chomps on it. (explosion)

(laughter)

MATT: An explosion of flame completely engulfs both him and Fearne in a 20-foot radius.

(exclaiming)

MATT: All of the nearby trees that were covered in morning dew and mist are now scorched and there is a vacant spot where the warmth has completely eliminated the surrounding mist and fog.

MARISHA: Fearne!

MATT: All the rest of you hear (explosion).

TALIESIN: What the fuck?

ASHLEY: It's okay!

LAURA: I am up the trees in the treetop, so I could spot the skyship.

ASHLEY: Oh!

SAM: It's happening again!

MARISHA: Oh my god!

LAURA: Oh god!

ASHLEY: It's all right. Oh, is everything on fire, or was just a voof?

TRAVIS: Are you on fire?

MATT: Everything is scorched, but there are no flames catching. Thankfully, it is a moist enough jungle, and the flame is immediate enough that it didn't catch. However, you do 8d6 fire damage to Fearne.

SAM: 8d6!

LAURA: (gasps)

TRAVIS: (laughs)

MARISHA: I thought we were going to start small.

ASHLEY: Let's go! Let's go.

MATT: You're a practiced sorcerer.

TRAVIS: There's no dialing down a fireball.

MATT: Yeah.

MARISHA: Eight. But you talked about it being like an ember.

MATT: Of course.

MARISHA: It's the little purplely and glowy, like those deep--

TRAVIS: Fireball light.

MARISHA: The center of a dark ember.

SAM: Oh god.

MARISHA: Oh god.

TRAVIS: Jesus, she just chaired.

LIAM: Did you just roll your chair?

MARISHA: I did. 12.

LIAM: What'd you get on the chair?

ASHLEY: Yeah.

LAURA: Four.

TRAVIS: Two legs.

MARISHA: 12, 14, 16, 18, 25 damage. 25 damage.

MATT: 25 points of fire damage to you, Fearne. Mister, I believe is immune to fire?

ASHLEY: Probably.

MATT: It makes sense.

ASHLEY: I'm going to check real quick.

MATT: You hear this explosion, you glance over. Now, you're used to the bright, vibrant oranges and reds of natural and nature-based fire. This little seed of this little mote of energy as it comes towards you, the red ember turns to a dark purplish color. As it detonates, the flames that surround you in a flash are a deep black, purple coloration. This is a different kind of fire, pulled from a different kind of energy, from a different kind of magical source.

ASHLEY: (grunts)

MARISHA: You caught it!

LAURA and SAM: (laugh)

ASHLEY: I did!

MARISHA: (gasps)

LIAM: Fearne!

ASHLEY: Whoa! That was--

LIAM: Is that you?

ASHLEY: Yes.

LAURA: Y'all all right?

ASHLEY: Yes. Yes.

MATT: "(monkey hoots)"

ASHLEY: Everything's fine.

SAM: Are we attacking each other again?

LIAM: Why did you just pop off?

ASHLEY and MARISHA: No, no, no.

ASHLEY: No, no, no. No, no, no.

MARISHA: Practicing.

ASHLEY: We were just having a lesson, and turns out, Laudna's very extremely powerful and good at it already.

MARISHA: Oh goodness!

ASHLEY: That was amazing!

MARISHA: Thank you.

ASHLEY: Like that was--

MARISHA: Well, you're an amazing teacher.

ASHLEY: I didn't even know I could teach. I didn't even know I could teach and I feel like I love it.

MARISHA: Yeah. I mean, so inspiring!

ASHLEY: Oh my god! Okay, this was so fun! We should do more classes.

MARISHA: Okay.

LIAM: Maybe the--

ASHLEY: Okay.

LIAM: Maybe the next lesson could be in an open field, though?

LAURA: Are you all right?

ASHLEY: Sure. I mean, that definitely hurt.

MATT: (laughs)

SAM: Do you want me to heal you? Can we go a day without killing one of each other?

MARISHA: Well, this was, you know--

ASHLEY: For sure. I'm going to take a little bit of a nap on the ship. It's fine.

SAM: A little bit of a nap?

ASHLEY: When you're--

SAM: Your hair is all gone!

MARISHA: You are a little singed.

ASHLEY: That is not true.

SAM: Well.

(laughter)

ASHLEY: I see it here.

SAM: Your eyebrows are gone.

LAURA: Oh, it's just the back of it. It's all gone.

ASHLEY: Just the eyebrows.

LAURA: The front is--

ASHLEY: Well, it's a little patchy back there, but I'm going to take a nap on the ship. It's fine.

LAURA: Oh, speaking of.

ASHLEY: The thing is, you know, when you teach, when you're an amazing teacher, you do know that sometimes you're going to take a little bit of the heat.

MARISHA: Oh, yes. So wise.

ASHLEY: If you have an amazing student, I mean, what are you going to do?

SAM: It just goes with the territory of teaching? You just got to take--

ASHLEY: Yeah. It's fine. I'm just going to take a nap.

LIAM: Are you going to sleep it off?

ASHLEY: I'm going to sleep it off. I'm just loving this warmth that I'm working with.

SAM: Should we call you "professor" now? I mean.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

LAURA: Professor Fearne?

ASHLEY: Professor Calloway.

LAURA: Professor Calloway's way better!

SAM: (laughs)

ASHLEY: Class is in session.

(laughter)

MATT: So you're sending up--

LAURA: Prestidigitation.

MATT: Prestidigitation. Just create some sparks and--

TRAVIS: ♪ I've got it bad-- ♪

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: All right.

TALIESIN: I would have taken a second. Was it Fressio had the big hammer? Which one of the--

MATT: The hammer is Annaline.

TALIESIN: Oh, it was Annaline.

MATT: Yeah, the leader.

TALIESIN: I would've hunted them down.

MATT: Okay, yeah. She's not too far, especially as they're preparing for the gathering, they're getting the materials up, and Annaline's putting out the fire that was used to cook lunch, would it be at this point in time, and kicks the dirt over and notices you approaching.

TALIESIN: So, I'm really bad at this. Yeah. You've met our friend now and you see what we have to deal with and what we're going to be dealing with on a day to day basis with that guy.

MATT: "I know it very well."

TALIESIN: He's a lot.

MATT: "Hmm."

TALIESIN: I was watching you practice. Would you (mumbles) show me something? I don't know. Not that I... I'm really...

(laughter)

TALIESIN: I mean, I'm really fucking good with this thing. But I saw you doing some stuff when we were... I mean, I don't think you were showing off. You might have been showing off, but it was pretty, you know, it was pretty cool.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

TALIESIN: If you got a second, I'd love to learn something, whatever you got.

MATT: Her tense brow turns into a side smirk before giving a nod and a playful sigh. "(sighs) Of course. We have a little bit of time. Come."

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: Takes you off into the clearing and begins with the gentle sparring, getting a feel for your technique and begins to give you notes. "It's a bit untethered, unfocused, which could work to your advantage. I think what could really work to your advantage is to know how to focus, how to maintain the discipline and switch off between the unknowable, chaotic technique that you utilize with bursts of discipline. Then, you keep them guessing. As far as your friend goes, sometimes you have to knock some sense into them."

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: "There's a right part of the temple, not too close to the center where the eye is because you can do permanent damage, but right above and to the side. You'd be surprised how heavily you could clock someone and send them sprawling for a time to regain their wits. Right about..." They glance over to the hole in the side of your head.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: "It's right about there, actually."

TALIESIN: I'm pretty familiar with that one.

MATT: "Good."

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: "Just imagine that hole in their head and aim for it."

TALIESIN: Right. (sighs) Let's do some rounds, if you don't mind. So yeah, just spar.

MATT: Yep.

TALIESIN: Try and focus.

MATT: You all begin to hear the cracking of hammer on hammer, the occasional whiff as a large weapon is wielded through the air, cutting through, occasionally a tree trunk takes the impact. It sounds like the distant rolling thunder of an oncoming storm off on the horizon as the both of them end up sparring through the nearby grounds outside of the temple. It's about this time the skyship begins to close in. Both you and Annaline finish up the session. She's breathing a little heavy. "Not too bad. I think you might have some talent within you."

TALIESIN: Thank you. I appreciate everything you've done for my friend. He's a fucking mess.

MATT: "Yes, he is. But we all were." She looks at some of her compatriots. "We all are."

TALIESIN: (laughs) Look forward to making our way back here one of these days.

SAM: ♪ Makin' our way ♪

MATT: "I hope so.

SAM and MARISHA: (laugh) Lugs the hammer up onto her shoulder--

SAM: ♪ back here some day ♪

MARISHA and LIAM: (laughs)

MATT: -- walks over to you as you begin to see now, the skyship has found the space and is circling over. You can gather off the side, you can see Khalil is shouting over the side. "We're coming around! Going to put down the ladder! Prepare, gather your things!" As it does

(whirring engine)

SAM: Everybody finish your rabbit!

TALIESIN: Wait, there was rabbit?

SAM: Oh, yeah!

TALIESIN: Oh fuck!

SAM: It's just been sitting here.

LIAM: Here you go.

MATT and MARISHA: (laughs)

LAURA: Oh, did you make it?

SAM: I should've told you. I made it, but I don't know what to do, so I just left it there.

LAURA: Did you cook it enough?

TALIESIN: This is so greasy.

LAURA: How'd you? How?

SAM: I tried it.

ASHLEY: You left a little bit of the hair.

SAM: It doesn't taste like much. Oh, is the hair all supposed to come off? I thought that would be good to, you could grab onto it a little easier.

TRAVIS: Oh boy!

MARISHA: Mm!

LAURA: Ew!

ASHLEY: It's certainly an option. Add some weird flavors.

TALIESIN: I'm not going to tell you how to eat your rabbit.

LAURA: It's really good, FCG.

SAM: I'll work on it.

MATT: Annaline approaches you as everyone's preparing for this and stands over you for a second, hammer still on the shoulder. "How are you feeling, Pock O'Pea?"

TRAVIS: Oh...

(laughter)

SAM: That sounds so weird!

TRAVIS: Dignified! Dignified.

LAURA: Pock O'Pea.

ASHLEY and MARISHA: (laugh)

TRAVIS: I feel good. Invigorated, inspired, but also a little, I don't know, maybe a little more anchored than before? Maybe more worried. I think I just enjoyed the wild nature of what was inside rather than really weighing the consequences of what letting it out might be. But that's probably a good thing.

MATT: "It's a necessary perspective. It is very intoxicating, what it offers. I think the key is learning when is the appropriate time to let it take over."

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MATT: "And letting them know."

TRAVIS: Yeah. Thanks.

MATT: "But we carry--"

TRAVIS: Hmm?

MATT: "We carry."

(laughter)

MARISHA: He's super old.

SAM: So old!

TRAVIS: I felt so young this morning, then Laudna fucked me up.

(laughter)

MATT: "What we carry is heavy. Those of us who lose the strength to do so, often it's because we try and carry it alone. If they care about you, and they offer, let them help you carry it."

TRAVIS: I know, but it's so much easier just to try and do it yourself.

MATT: "I know. Trust me. I know."

TRAVIS: Thank you for this opportunity to learn. I'll come back if we ever catch a break in the action, but it's pretty nonstop with these guys.

MATT: "I understand. Well, you know loosely where to find us or at least how to call us, if need be."

TRAVIS: True.

MATT: "Now we know what your sound is."

TRAVIS: Our sound? The collective sound?

MATT: "Yes. Your howl was the most, though."

TRAVIS: Thanks. I have a question.

MATT: "Mm-hmm?"

TRAVIS: I just saddle up to her knee.

TRAVIS and MARISHA: (laugh)

TRAVIS: Uther was with the Claret Order?

MATT: "He was before, yeah."

TRAVIS: Do you know why he left?

MATT: "(exhales) Best I know, he-- He left a wound on his past. The place he once called home, he... He did enough damage where it was no longer home."

TRAVIS: Mm.

MATT: "There's a recurring theme in our kind of nomadic misfits. Part of this journey is learning how to stop, pardon the turn of phrase, shitting where we sleep."

TRAVIS: Right. Guess it only matters if you care where you sleep. It's kind of new for me. Okay. Thank you.

MATT: "Of course. Remember, runes, clear markings."

SAM: Yeah.

MATT: "Intersections. Embody what you want to prevent, embody what you want to instill, embody the kind of pain you want to drive in, and mark accordingly."

TRAVIS: Yeah. I'll keep practicing.

MATT: "All right. Now get!"

TRAVIS: All right.

(tiny quick footsteps)

MATT: While you're all about to head up and the ladder is now dropped, and people are starting to gather up, Fearne, you hear Manad's voice. "Uh, Fearne!"

ASHLEY: Yes?

MATT: "Just wanted to say good luck to you and your friends out there, and I don't know, you know, just..."

(laughter)

SAM: (hisses)

TRAVIS: Sweeps it out of her face, it just falls off.

ASHLEY: Yeah. Crisps off.

MATT: (laughs) Maybe you left the straightener on too long.

ASHLEY: Yeah Smells a little weird, but I don't think that's me.

SAM, MARISHA, and MATT: (laugh)

MATT: "I just wanted to say, tell everyone for us, good luck and you're always welcome to come back and visit Barinak any time."

ASHLEY: Oh, I will, I will.

MATT: "Yeah."

ASHLEY: Is the invitation just open for all the time?

MATT: "Well, I mean, for training and sharing stories about the world and adventures, you know? We don't really get too far out of the jungles. It's just nice to know. You folks have a ship, so you're getting around a bunch and you're caught up in some weird stuff. Yeah, just anytime you want to come on by. I can get some more rabbits."

ASHLEY: All right. That sounds like fun.

MATT: "Great."

ASHLEY: Okay.

MARISHA: (laughs)

MATT: Then he just darts off.

TRAVIS: Bye, Manad!

TALIESIN: Did that just happen?

MATT: "Oh! Bye, Chetney! Good luck!"

TRAVIS: Thanks.

TALIESIN: That really did just happen. Holy shit!

ASHLEY: (sighs) Well, we're welcome back here anytime.

LAURA: (laughs)

SAM: Are you--

MARISHA: What did she write?

LAURA: Just, "Manad."

(laughter)

ASHLEY: I didn't finish my sentence yet.

MARISHA: Little hearts.

(laughter)

MATT: She's circling it over and over.

TALIESIN: Are you making a kill list?

SAM: Are you all right? Because it looks like-- Is that part of the burn or is that just the reddening of your flesh there? What is that?

ASHLEY: Oh, it might be the reddening of my flesh.

SAM: Because of the horrific burn you received?

MARISHA: (laughs)

ASHLEY: Maybe a little bit of both. You know? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

(laughter)

SAM: You are the most chill burn victim I've ever met.

(laughter)

ASHLEY: Well, I'm just really proud of my student. I don't know what to say.

MATT and LAURA: (laugh)

TALIESIN: I mean, okay.

ASHLEY: Well, I'm going to take a little bit of a nap.

SAM: Sure.

LAURA: Yeah, you need some rest.

ASHLEY: Yeah, I'm going to take a--

LAURA: Sleep off that burn.

ASHLEY: Mm-hmm. So if you need me, come get me.

TRAVIS: (laughs) Sleep off that burn.

MATT: (laughs)

LIAM: Yeah.

SAM: That works.

MATT: It's how it works.

SAM: (laughs)

MARISHA: D&D!

TRAVIS: Oh, just go to take a nap.

LIAM: You ever go to the hospital and see the people sleeping off their burns?

(laughter)

MATT: So you all clamber back up onto the skyship--

TALIESIN: -- people got to be weird.

MATT: -- the Silver Sun. You're greeted by the crew, and of course, Captain Xandis. "Welcome back! Glad to see you all in one sort of pieces, mostly. Oh, you had a morning."

LAURA: (laughs)

MATT: "So I guess we're going back towards Yios, right? That's where we're heading?"

LIAM: Back on the main path.

LAURA: That is where we're off to.

MATT: "All right. Weather's looking pretty decent. We're outside of the Hellcatch so about a two days or so journey, looking to make it south around that place."

LAURA: Okay.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: "I guess, buckle up!"

LIAM: Pretty close.

SAM: Is there--

MATT: Go ahead and takes to the wheel and they pull up the ladder and then (engine rumbling) the skyship begins to curve back in a southern direction. As you all feel the ship begin to crest away, you glance over the side and can see just barely the shape of the cliffside temple as it begins to peek through part of the canopy. And the handful of distant faces of the Gorgynei looking up before they charge back into the jungle. You can barely hear the echoing distant sound of (howls)--

LAURA: (laughs)

MATT: -- as they go rushing.

MARISHA: Cool.

(laughter)

LAURA: Just Chetney on the side of the ship.

TRAVIS: (shouts) Yeah!

(laughter)

TRAVIS: Whoa! Oh shit!

(laughter)

MATT: But you have two days' journey. I'd like someone to roll a d20 for the first day.

LIAM: Start this side!

TALIESIN: Where were we?

LIAM: Oh, we're on you?

SAM: I think it was me next.

MARISHA: I think it was you. Yeah.

LIAM: Get it.

SAM: As we're flying--

TRAVIS: Roll a five.

MATT: Mm-hmm?

SAM: What'd you say?

TRAVIS: Roll a five.

LIAM: Roll one. Travis and I want to play.

SAM: It's a natural 20.

TRAVIS: (scoffs)

LIAM: Fuck you!

MATT: It's actually not a one to five anymore. One to five was over the Hellcatch.

(oohing)

TRAVIS: It changed!

MARISHA: Now it's 15 to 20?

MATT: Hmm?

SAM: We don't know, we don't know, we don't know.

MATT: You don't know.

LIAM: It's one to two.

MATT: It's much lesser. That was when the Hellcatch was so dangerous.

SAM: As we're flying, I'd love to find Denalia? The cook?

MATT: Yeah, yeah.

SAM: And grab, if I could, who has Eshteross' resh-ipes?

LIAM: His resh-ipes?

SAM: (laughs)

LIAM: Doesn't Laudna have the resh-ipes?

TALIESIN: I'm pretty sure the resh-ipe is with Laudna.

LAURA: No, this is not.

TRAVIS: Imogen.

LAURA: What is this?

LIAM: They're the sh-ame person.

TALIESIN: Yesh.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MARISHA: I raided the spice cabinet. Turmeric, ginger.

SAM: Oh, Eshteross'?

MARISHA: Eshteross'.

TALIESIN: Yes.

SAM: Well, that'll help. Who's got got the fucking letter?

LAURA: I have the recipe.

LIAM: We've got sh-alt.

LAURA: No, he had the recipe.

LIAM: Sh-innamon.

(laughter)

TALIESIN: I have this can of what I thought was just Play-Doh, but apparently is some sort of sourdough starter or some stuff. It's been sitting there for a while,

MATT and TRAVIS: (laugh)

SAM: Oh, but I'd love to work with Denalia and try to prepare some of these--

MATT: "Oh, of course. No, I'd be happy to."

LAURA: Well, we had his cookie recipe That's what he gave us.

SAM: I'll try to make some cookies.

MATT: "Yeah, no. I haven't made cookies in a while." Denalia takes the recipe, looks it over.

SAM: Can you teach me how to do it, too?

TRAVIS: I don't know.

MATT: "What?"

SAM: Can you teach me how to do it, too?

MATT: "Of course. Yeah, just follow along. It's not hard to do. Come on, come on."

SAM: Well, I just can't, I've never been around food before, so I don't know anything about nothing. You should treat me like a total novice, all right?

MATT: "Of course. Yeah, no, okay. Just keep your ears or whatever you got there perked up."

SAM: I have ears.

MATT: "We're going to make some cookies.

SAM: Okay.

LAURA: I'm fucking falling apart.

MATT: "Come on. Come on."

MARISHA: It's a Tim and Eric character. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Have we heard?

SAM: Great, Denalia?

MARISHA: Have we heard Denalia?

MATT: Very briefly.

TALIESIN: Oh wow.

LAURA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: I feel like I would remember that.

MATT: So Denalia is a sandy-haired bug bear, just body covered in fur, long arms, and this little--

TRAVIS: Sweetheart.

MATT: -- this little formal dress on that looks a little tattered and worn that she wears every day.

ASHLEY: I love her.

MATT: Brings you down and brings you step by step in the creation, the recreation, I should say, of this lauded and worldwide unappreciated, untested, untried recipe of Lord Eshteross' maple ginger cookies.

LIAM: Ginger.

MATT: But yeah. So you pick up the gist of it, and so if you ever want to make them on your own, we can roll some checks to see how they go.

SAM: Amazing. That's amazing. Oh, but the d20 was 20.

MATT: Yeah, yeah. No worries. Which, fair weather. Just as Captain Xandis had originally described.

TRAVIS: Boo.

MATT: Even the mists of the jungle seem to be relatively thin. You have now a beautiful overview of the many multitudes of textures and colors that move through. You can see glimmers of the Chalkstep Road that carves through the north side. This is the road that connects the Hellcatch Valley to the heart of Aeshanadoor.

TRAVIS and MARISHA: ♪ Aeshanadoor ♪

MATT: You also look down and you see what looks to be along this road, another village below, that's intersecting with the road and built in the middle of the jungle. As you glance over, you can see it looks to be of a moderate size, maybe a few thousand people call it their home. But you can see there are heavy walls and looks like there are a couple of watch towers there, holdovers from the last military re-encampment of the villages during the Apex War. But there are folks around there that have cultivated and cut down some of the land and turned it into farming land, and there is a bustling society beneath.

LAURA: What city is it? Do we know?

MATT: Make a history check.

SAM: You don't know how to spell it?

MARISHA: No, I don't, because I've been spelling it wrong this whole time!

LAURA: Would it be at advantage, because it's an area that I'm kind of familiar with or no?

MATT: No, you just have a lower DC, because you are from the area.

MARISHA: It's just the Y that was wrong.

LAURA: ♪ Four ♪

MATT: Four? (laughs)

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: Unfortunately, you're not certain what this is.

SAM: Two-yo?

MATT: Growing up in the part of the Taloned Highlands, you did-- There wasn't a lot of conversation about the specifics of the geography of Aeshanadoor. You've never traveled here nor had much of a reason to look into it. But you're welcome to ask. Captain Xandis easily goes, "Oh, that right down there? Yeah, that's Qoreo."

LAURA: Qoreo.

MATT: Q-O-R-E-O.

SAM: North Qoreo or South Qoreo?

(laughter)

MATT: Goddamn it. Every time.

LIAM: Two seconds. Two seconds.

LAURA: Q-O-R-E-O?

MATT: Q-O-R-E-O. Yeah.

LAURA: Q-O-R-E-O.

MATT: Qoreo.

LAURA: Cool.

TRAVIS: And just because Marisha doesn't know how to take notes, how do you spell Yios?

SAM: We got it already. Dani just told us.

MARISHA: It's Y-I-O-S.

MATT: Y-I-O-S.

TRAVIS: Yeah, like I said.

LAURA: It is not at all how I ever spelled it in my notes.

MARISHA: I've been spelling it with an E.

LAURA: Yeah, me too.

SAM: I like E better. I'm going to keep spelling it with an E.

LAURA: No, I like it with the Y, it's cool with the Y.

SAM: No, I'm doing Y-E-O-S.

TALIESIN: No, that's not right.

LAURA: Oh, no.

MARISHA: That's what I've been doing. Oh no.

ASHLEY: That's like Yos. (laughter) Okay.

LIAM: (exaggerated New York accent) Yos!

SAM: (exaggerated New York accent) Yos, welcome!

TRAVIS: Hey, your carefully cultivated thing? Fuck that.

SAM: Oh no, he's rolling!

MATT: What?

SAM: He's rolling.

ASHLEY: Oh no! Oh no!

(laughter)

LAURA: I haven't heard of that city before. How long has it been here?

MATT: "That's been down there for a long time. It's just one of the smaller outposts that is part of Aeshanadoor. Most of them were all fitted out to be extension strongholds of Yios a while back, but now they're just kind of acclimating over the years, and not being quite as stuck up."

TALIESIN: What were they supposed to be counteracting? What were they fighting off?

MATT: "Oh, that would be the Stratos Throne to the west."

TALIESIN: Okay.

MATT: "There was quite a bit of bloodshed back in those days. They had a lot of incursions from both sides. A lot of spies and kind of espionage going on as well as distant aerial combats and some real kind of bloody scuffles before both sides called it quits, not really making for lots of the money and the happiness of the peoples that are in them. So, you know, truce. Still kind of going, I suppose. Oh, and look down over there. It's the Hablon River."

TRAVIS: Hablon?

MATT: Yes. You look over and you can see there's this massive river that's carving from the northeastern direction that is winding through the jungle and it splinters off into smaller rivers at certain points, but it maintains this one core thread. From where it is, heading in a southwestern direction, it begins to curve into a just straight south. "So that there, that's going to interact towards where we're going. So right now, for me at least, I'm following that river. Comes over from the Panagrip Sands that far."

LAURA: So, Pana--

LIAM: Panagrip Sands.

TRAVIS: That's where it comes from.

TALIESIN: Geography is not really my thing.

LAURA: I wish we had the map.

TRAVIS: Do we have a map of this area, or are we outside of the map that we have?

MATT: You do not have a map of this area.

TALIESIN: We got to get a map of this area.

TRAVIS: I guess.

TALIESIN: That'd be pretty cool.

MATT: But that day goes without issue. The evening goes by, and your last day of travel, possibly, unless someone rolls really bad, towards the city of Yios is encroaching. I need somebody to roll the last d20.

LIAM: Wait, before we fight a dragon, potentially.

TRAVIS: It's where?

LIAM: The next morning: Hey, Chet?

TRAVIS: Hello!

LIAM: I don't know if you remember.

ASHLEY: We got a night of rest?

LAURA: I guess so.

TRAVIS: Wait, can you uncuff me?

LIAM: I'm having an awakening, Chetney, hold on.

MATT and MARISHA: (laugh)

LIAM: Do I have keys?

TRAVIS: They're under my body.

(laughter)

LIAM: All right.

TRAVIS: Ooh!

TALIESIN: It's Velcro, you just pull.

TRAVIS: Don't tickle now.

LIAM: Keeping it together, Popeye.

(laughter)

TRAVIS: Ah, thanks.

LIAM: Sorry. I don't know if you're going to remember, because you were like 25 feet tall and trying to kill us, but I made this for you--

MARISHA: Contempt.

LIAM: I hold out the same crude little wolf that was like three quarters done 36 hours ago, but now it's done. It's not amazing, but it does look like a wolf. I also bought a wolf to give you at this table.

LAURA: A real wolf.

LIAM: A real wolf.

TRAVIS: Oh!

LIAM: But, this is Liam talking. But it came and it was much nicer than the wolf you then brought out a few weeks later, so I was like, well, I can't use that now. I over shot.

(laughter)

TRAVIS: You could've just fucked it up.

LIAM: I should've fucked it up.

SAM: You still could.

TRAVIS: Just tie it-- (laughs) Tie it behind your dog and have it run around the--

LIAM: I'll go run over it in the parking lot a few times before our next game.

MATT: Just Napoleon Dynamite it, like tie it to the string and put it out the side of the window.

TRAVIS: Yeah. Uh-huh.

LIAM: But anyway, here's this imaginary one.

(laughter)

LIAM: I'm glad you're here. I'm glad we were able to help you figure things out. I don't love you coming after me so regularly, but we'll deal with it. Anyway, I just want to say, I'm glad you're with us.

TRAVIS: Orym, you're one of the bravest people I know. It's incredible. You're so young and handsome. This is truly awful. It's really, really bad. But look.

LIAM: It's true.

TRAVIS: It's the thought that counts. If you just stick with it for a couple hundred years, we could refine this into something that could be a paper weight.

LIAM: It's not even paper weight worthy now?

TRAVIS: Not yet. We're not going to show this to anybody, because I don't want to affect your ego, okay? But listen, it's the gesture. And you and I, we can cultivate this. It's a good starting point. Plus, you're working with like-- I mean, you're basically trying to use an axe on a finesse.

LIAM: I'm using a shortsword. It's really hard.

TRAVIS: It's hard.

LIAM: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Did you cut yourself a lot?

LIAM: Three times last night.

TRAVIS: I tell you what. I take out one of my finesse hook chisels. This one is good for both curves, a little indentation and pressure work, and just an overall shape. Now, wrap your thumb while you're getting used to it, because usually you can ride the blade on this just a little bit. Try not to do that and see where it takes you. Plus if you don't want to roll in somewhere with your big shortsword, you can just keep this in your hand and then open somebody's neck up and it works a lot easier.

LIAM: I was going to ask, how many people have you killed with this thing?

TRAVIS: I mean, you know, I'm not so great with counting that high.

LIAM: Wow, and you're a hundred something years old.

TRAVIS: No, I'm just kidding, I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding, No, I haven't killed anybody with this one yet.

LIAM: Okay. You're giving it to me? Is this a loaner?

TRAVIS: Yeah. I mean, I have a couple of them, but this is a basic all around chisel, it's good.

LIAM: All right, well I'll see if I can get up to paper weight status on the next one.

TRAVIS: But this stays with me, only because we don't want anybody else to see it.

LIAM: It's true, I don't want the others to see it. This went about as well as I expected it to.

TRAVIS: Good. It's good. Did you sign it?

LIAM: Should I?

TRAVIS: Well yeah, you got to leave a mark or initials or something.

LIAM: Oh man.

TRAVIS: Doesn't have to be letters, it could be anything.

LIAM: Everyone's telling me to name things lately. Look at my sword! I pull it out and there's just like vines, tendrils, going all up my forearm, holding it in place. Look at this thing! The gods are watching!

TRAVIS: Did that change?

LIAM: I cover his face--

TRAVIS: Ah!

LIAM: -- like Spider-Man in vine tendrils from seven feet away and I pull him in close. Yeah, it does all kinds of stupid shit now! The gods are watching. After you guys left, the statue of Seraatani, of the Wildmother, Seraatani, started to glow. I don't know, I just got a feeling from it. Fearne saw, ask her.

TRAVIS: What do you--

LIAM: She gave me a blessing, I guess.

TRAVIS: The statue glowed just when you were there, and were you imbued with an animal spirit? Well, what happened?

LIAM: Well, the statue, she was holding a hilt, and I just had a feeling and I slid the sword in.

ASHLEY and LAURA: (snicker)

LAURA: I swear she did it.

TRAVIS: Terrible.

LIAM: That's fine. It went about as well as I expected over here.

TRAVIS: Yep. Uh-huh.

LIAM: And I--

LAURA: I smiled, she made me do it.

LIAM: -- got blessed.

TRAVIS: That's incredible. You should really name your sword.

LIAM: I did.

TRAVIS: Oh!

LIAM: I did, yeah. Uther told me he had like a really badass weapon with a scary name about taking people's jaws off. I didn't feel like that was right for me. The sword already has sentimental value, it was from Will, and I'm never going to let go of it. So I tried to think, what is something that speaks to Will and speaks to me and speaks to the blessing she gave. Anyway, this is Seedling.

TRAVIS: Ooh!

ASHLEY: Aw!

LIAM: The Wayward Pilgrim.

ASHLEY: Oh!

LIAM: Pretty cool, huh?

TRAVIS: Yeah. That's a good name.

LIAM: Ah! Cut myself.

TRAVIS: Hand wrap. Yep. That's going to be happening a lot. Don't worry, it toughens up the skin.

LIAM: All right. Maybe I'll come to you for pointers, too. But I'll start with this.

TRAVIS: I don't know much about the gods or if they're listening, but if they are paying attention to someone, I'm glad it's you.

LIAM: I don't know, man. I don't know. I do feel a bit better about our chances than I have in a few days, at least.

TRAVIS: Yeah!

LIAM: Yeah.

TRAVIS: We're pretty much unstoppable now.

LIAM: It's going to be fine.

TRAVIS: We're gods!

LIAM: Basically.

MARISHA: ♪ Represent. She lives ♪

LAURA: Imogen just jumps off the side of the ship.

TRAVIS: No!

(laughter)

MATT: For no reason.

LIAM: She just hit the ground in human shape. Oh wow.

TRAVIS: Thank you for this. I will keep it with me at all times. I tuck it back behind me harness.

(laughter)

SAM: Oh!

LIAM: All right, all right. I didn't mean to make a whole big thing, but thanks.

TRAVIS: What are you talking about? Your sword's got a name, man. Got to live in it. It's great.

LIAM: He kicks his heels and runs off.

TRAVIS and MATT: (laugh)

TRAVIS: Okay.

MATT: Tink.

MATT: All right, so Ashley, are you rolling the dice for the final day of the journey?

ASHLEY: Is it me or is it going this way?

TRAVIS: It's you.

LIAM: It's you.

ASHLEY: Oh goodness.

MATT: (laughs)

TRAVIS: Come on, do us right.

TALIESIN: Fuck it up. We want a weird number.

LIAM: Fuck it up to the tempo. One or two. One or two.

ASHLEY: 11.

LIAM: Useless to me.

(laughter)

ASHLEY: You're dead to me. You're dead.

TRAVIS: You had one job.

MATT: All right. While the sky grows a little more gray, it still remains broken to see the blue sky beyond it. The weather is nice. The wind works in your favor, and the day's journey coasts by without major incident.

TRAVIS: Ugh.

TRAVIS: (grunts)

MATT: As you glance beyond--

SAM: Stupid Ashley. (laughter)

(laughter)

TRAVIS: Go back to bed!

(laughter)

MATT: Continuing on through the afternoon, you can see in the distance little signs of what you think at first might be smoke from a fire, but it looks to be just little bastions--

MARISHA: Oh shit. Oh shit.

MATT: -- of society, civilization, that are beyond your view--

TRAVIS: Oh shit. Oh shit.

MATT: -- just on the horizon. Then beyond the horizon, too, you can see the mountain ranges that swirl around this section of Aeshanadoor and then see rising in the far, far distance, near where the southern horizon is, you can see what look like rising cliffs and hills. Areas that the coloration of the land varies and drifts away from the Gloomed Jungles, and the topography seems to be a little more gray and shale-based, best you can tell. Too far to make out too much detail, but the hills appear turbulent and twisted. As you're glancing off, taking in the distant horizon, Captain Xandis goes, "Ah, you're looking-- Right over there, that's The Shallowlands, southern side of Aeshanadoor. Kind of its own rough and tumble region. Not much trade to do about there. Haven't really flown that far south. Don't really go beyond Yios, because not much of a reason to. But hear it's got a whole bunch of fun elemental, crazy magic spattered around."

LIAM: Fun as in fun or fun as in murder you?

MATT: "Yes."

TRAVIS: Mm-hmm.

TALIESIN: You can hardly have one without the other.

MATT: "But I think what-- Hold on." Goes ahead and clips on the chain that holds the direction of the skyship to continue forward. Looks over the side and glances, "Ah, we're getting real close." You can see as the sun's slowly beginning to set away from that, and the coloration of the sky changes, you can see there is a lake. A very large lake ahead of you. "That there is Lake Koron. That's the lake that sits in the center of Aeshanadoor. That's the lake that Yios is built upon. Right there on the northern side of it, just going to see it right before we even get there, that has to be Aruati."

SAM: Oh god.

MATT: "That's the fishing village on the north side of the lake."

LIAM: Aruati?

LAURA: ♪ Aruati ♪

(laughter)

TALIESIN: Oh no!

LIAM: You crazy guys.

MARISHA: How do you spell Aruati?

MATT: A-R-U-A-T-I.

MARISHA: A-T-I.

LAURA: Ah, I was so close!

LIAM: I was way off.

ASHLEY: I was way, too.

TALIESIN: I was super off.

LAURA: I was one letter off.

SAM and MATT: (laugh)

LIAM: Was it Lake Goran, Horan?

MATT: Koron, K-O-R-O-N.

LIAM: K-O-R-O-N, thank you.

LAURA: I spelled it with a Q, because the other was a Q. Qoreo, Koron.

LIAM: Got to keep you guessing. Got to keep you guessing.

MARISHA: Wait, Qoreo's with a Q?

LIAM: Yep.

MATT: Yes.

MARISHA: Fuck!

(laughter)

TALIESIN: There will be a write up later. I mean I just wait for my spelling for the write up.

SAM: We should put out a game that's just a Guess Matt's Spelling.

LAURA: Oh yeah, that would be so fun.

(laughter)

MARISHA: Hey, Darrington Press.

(laughter)

TALIESIN: I love it. I love it.

MATT: You motherfuckers.

TRAVIS: Let's build that into the Twitch app.

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: Needs more apostrophes.

(laughter)

LIAM: And vowels!

LAURA: Aruati is actually A-R-U-A-T apostrophe I.

TRAVIS: Back-to-back apostrophe?

MATT: Oh, got you, no. It is not.

LIAM: The entire country of Wales is going, what? What's the fucking problem?

TRAVIS: Wales.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: "But then beyond that--" You can see already, as you get closer and closer to the village, looking over the top of it, there are a number of fishing vessels that are scattered out beyond the docks on the south side of the village as you continue in that southward direction. You can see torch lights are coming on throughout the city as it gets darker and darker. The southern side of the city, there is a large bridge that continues out over the lake. Maybe about two, three miles of bridge continues out into the lake before it hits a little hub, a little station with towers, and then continues on still.

LIAM: Is it low to the water, like flat, uninterrupted, or is it like hop, hop, hop?

MATT: No, it is a continuous bridge that has elements that go in deep under the water, but it is over the surface of the water, a straight bridge.

LIAM: Cool.

MATT: You can see along it, there are lantern lights that are aglow, and you can see now as it's shifting into nighttime and they're starting to be lit, there are people that their job is to go down and light them in procession. As you continue on, you can already now see the massive cluster of buildings and lights as Xandis goes, "And there it is, Yios. City of Flowing Light. Y'all been here before?"

LIAM: Heard a lot about it.

TALIESIN: No.

MATT: "Oh, looks like we came at the right time of the day, too. Get your things, this is going to get interesting." As it gets darker and darker, the thing you notice, and the name begins to kick in, at least the meaning of it, as the sunlight vanishes, the flowing waters of the lake, especially around the edges and on the outside of the city where it's moving glow a faint blue, like there's a natural glowing essence around the edges of the water movement. Just a natural illumination to it. You get closer still and you can see the city gets larger and larger as it approaches, and two other bridges carve off to the eastern and western sides of it, and they connect. The central city, Yios, sits in the middle of this lake--

LAURA: That's so cool.

MATT: -- built on top of it. What you also begin to notice as you're taking in the beautiful gentle turquoise blue light that magically swirls and shifts around the edges of the water, it stops at a dam partway, and then steps down. Then a little ways beyond that, it steps down. This is a three-tiered lake.

SAM: Cool.

MATT: Where these dams are set, there's these massive sluices that are built. There are towers and encampments along these bridges and at these breaks. You can see all manner of boats out and about, but this is a vibrant, unique, fishing-based lake city. And for a fishing city, it is massive.

TRAVIS: Are there whitecaps, or is it like a still, still lake?

MATT: There are whitecaps in places. You can see where these steps are, there was a built dam elements of it, and there are areas where it is whitecapped to let flow over into these waterfalls. There are, at the very edges, as you begin to go over the first part of the step, you can see there is a boat ramp that actually that comes down off the side, where boats can eventually ride down into the lower--

TRAVIS: Oh boy.

ASHLEY: Come on!

TALIESIN: Oh no.

TRAVIS: You made a descending--

ASHLEY: I want to go to there.

LAURA: This is definitely going--

LIAM: Going into the city?

LAURA: -- Critical Role land. This is the water ride.

MARISHA: Yes!

MATT: It gets lesser the further south it goes. The lake is actually this shape.

TRAVIS: There's a bridge above it.

MATT: Then another lower area, and then a lower area, and the city is built across those three elements. The city you now see is comprised of three rings on each of these levels. The city itself is multiple tiers where these different transitions occur.

TRAVIS: Dang.

LIAM: Oh.

MATT: As you get closer and closer, you can see where the water is shifting and all that bright blue coloration is moving with it, flowing, swirling, like the entire lake, now that most of the sun is gone, it looks like it's some sort of an ethereal incantation, like magical energy that's this arcane soup that surrounds the city, that lights it from underneath. You can see all the perimeter walls, all the docks, the numerous docks that dot the exterior of it are all gently lit by their proximity to the flowing water. The City of Flowing Light.

MARISHA: The City of Flowing Light.

SAM: Amazing.

ASHLEY: Wow, this is beautiful.

LIAM: Where do you touch down around here, Captain?

MATT: "Right over there. Like I said, the lights. It's the-- Which one is it? Right, it's the navy blue one, I think. I'll go with the red. We'll try the red." As Captain Xandis is pointing out there and you see them looking, there are a number of lighthouses around this side of the city at each of the docks. They each have their own unique coloration to help people who are out there, fording the lake to know which dock they're supposed to go back to. But there is, amongst one of the higher tiers of the city, what you see to be a small tower and a familiar construct that resembles a skyport.

SAM: Oh.

MARISHA: Hm.

MATT: "That's the one! That there's the Lakecap Skyport and Lounge."

(laughter)

MATT: "That's where we're going to be locking up, and that's where, while you do your business, I'm going to spend some money."

SAM: Oh.

LAURA: Oh, is it like a casino or something?

MATT: "It's got some games to play, yeah."

LAURA: Oh, that's fun.

MATT: "It's a partial lounge, partial casino, partial, you know, inn, they got rooms. A lot of trade flies through here, so they got to have places for us to go. We don't come here too often, but when we do, we make a time of it, don't you want to know?"

(laughter)

MATT: "All right, well--"

MARISHA: Do you want to know?

ASHLEY: Wait, I have a question.

MATT: "Yeah?"

ASHLEY: Can skyships also be used as regular ships?

MATT: "I mean, you can, but there's not much of a reason to."

ASHLEY: No, I know.

MATT: "The water just makes it a little more unpredictable."

ASHLEY: Okay, I was just wondering.

TALIESIN: If you wanted to fish, we can just add more line, and then we could fish, if that was the vibe.

MATT: "Actually, that's a good question. I haven't actually had to bring it in the water before, but I imagine it would work. It could float. It's a ship."

ASHLEY: It's a ship.

TRAVIS: Woodwork? Ah! Triggered!

MATT: "All right, guess we're getting in close. Let's see here. Khalil, can you put our approach beacon on?" Khalil goes out and takes a set of large torches, like lanterns, and lights them and puts them in the front of the sky ship to know that they're, letting the skyport know that they're coming in. As you slowly begin to drift into the port, to the dock, you can see there are a number of dock workers that help wave it in. They reach out for the ropes that the rest of the crew throw over to the side to help pull it, and as it comes in and gently hits on the side of the dock, you feel it lurch ever so gently, as they anchor it to the side of the skyport.

SAM: Are there other skyships docked here?

MATT: At the moment, there is one other skyship.

SAM: Okay.

MATT: It's on the other side of the dock right now. Looks like it's a little sparse compared to Jrusar. Jrusar, you imagine, being more on the intercontinental side of Marquet, gets a lot more in and out.

MARISHA: Xandis.

MATT: "Yeah?"

MARISHA: Do you know what makes the water glow like that?

MATT: It's got some sort of strange plankton type creatures that live in it.

MARISHA: Bioluminescent things?

TRAVIS: Fuck yes.

MATT: "Yeah, so when they get touched and moved around, they just kind of glow a bit, you know? They get kind of freaked out. But yeah, it's kind of-- It's really beautiful. What's wild is you should--" Actually, you can kind of see it from here. You look down, and through each of these tiers of the city, there are canals that run through them, and it gives this vibrant, LED-looking bloodstream that swirls through the neighborhoods as it progresses.

ASHLEY: Oh wow, that's cool.

MATT: "So, the boats are free, if they got room."

ASHLEY: We got to go for a ride.

SAM: That's pretty cool.

SAM: Wonder if you--

TRAVIS: Swim in it?

SAM: Drink the water, your pee glows.

ASHLEY: Yeah, I was wondering that.

TRAVIS: What?

SAM: I don't know.

ASHLEY: I get it's delicious.

MATT: "I've never tried that."

TALIESIN: I can think of at least four reasons why it wouldn't do that, but you're welcome to try.

ASHLEY: Well, he did say it was arcane soup, so.

MARISHA: Did he say that?

ASHLEY: Well, somebody did in the wind.

TALIESIN: Arcane soup does not become--

TRAVIS: Oh no.

(laughter)

ASHLEY: I don't know whose voice that was.

MATT: "Well, welcome to Yios! I guess we'll go talk to the dock master and figure out, you know, how much you owe them for how long we're staying for, and then let's find ourselves-- Well, we'll find ourselves some rooms. You don't have to stay at the lounge, you can find other places, but let's go!"

SAM: Oh, okay. What are we doing here?

LAURA: Well--

LIAM: We'll get situated.

SAM: But what does that mean? Where are we going?

TALIESIN: Somewhere to get situated.

LAURA: The seminary, I imagine.

LIAM: Yeah.

SAM: Okay.

LIAM: But it's late.

MARISHA: It's late, right. So maybe just--

SAM: So we need a place to stay.

TALIESIN: Let's find somewhere nice to stay.

MARISHA: A new place. I'm just so excited.

TALIESIN: Have you...?

ASHLEY: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

LIAM: So do you guys want to stay here, where Xandis is staying? Or do you want to walk the city for a little bit?

TALIESIN: Yeah, I want to get the fuck out of here. I don't know about the rest of you, I want to see this shit.

LAURA: I would like to see the water up close.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MARISHA: I've got new place energy, so.

TALIESIN: I'm wired as hell. Let's go.

MARISHA: Yeah. Same.

LIAM: We can't show up at the seminary at this hour.

LAURA: I mean, I don't imagine.

LIAM: All right.

LAURA: The Starlight Academy was open all night, but--

LIAM: We'll give ourselves one night.

LAURA: Yeah.

LIAM: One night.

ASHLEY: Wait, does the Starlight Academy also have one of those things where you can look up?

LAURA: Telescope?

ASHLEY: Yeah.

LAURA: I don't remember.

MATT: You didn't peruse the entirety of the academy, so you're not certain.

LAURA: We saw the library. So, as far as I know.

MARISHA: They were very snobby.

LAURA: Yeah.

MARISHA: Didn't want to let us in.

ASHLEY: Oh.

MARISHA: I know.

LAURA: It was one of the things Eshteross helped us with.

ASHLEY: Oh.

LAURA: Yeah.

ASHLEY: Well, maybe if you showed your friend. The big red thing that came out on the ship. Did we talk about that? Because that was--

MARISHA: Not in depth, no.

ASHLEY: We don't have to. I just, it was so interesting looking, and I think if they saw that, they'd be like, you can go anywhere in here you want.

LAURA: That's true. It might be a little intimidating because--

ASHLEY: That's true.

LAURA: From what I gathered, that thing attacked anything that was around it, including me.

MARISHA: Yeah, it might seem like--

ASHLEY: Oh, it did.

MARISHA: -- like a hostage situation or something. I don't know. Maybe that's extreme.

ASHLEY: Who knows?

LAURA: Maybe we find a room.

SAM: Yeah.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: As the rest of the crew of the Silver Sun gathers their goods, for those who are planning to disembark the ship, you gather your things, step off of the Silver Sun, feet hitting the heavy, well-reinforced wooden skyport dock, glancing over the edges to see the multitude of colors and the gentle blue glow of the surrounding horizon around you, we're going to go to break.

<!-- BREAK BEGINS

(groans)

MARISHA: New place, new place!

ASHLEY: Ooh, it's beautiful.

TALIESIN: What a new place!

LIAM: Region unlocked!

MARISHA: Yeah, right? Starlight, what did we call it?

SAM: Starpoint.

LAURA: Starpoint. Goddamn it, Starpoint.

MARISHA: Starlight Express Academy.

MARISHA: Starlight.

LAURA: Every time I said it, every single time.

MATT: I know, I know.

LAURA: I have it in my fucking--

LIAM: Starscream Academy.

ASHLEY: Starpoint?

LAURA: Starpoint Academy. I have it on a fucking book.

MATT: It's on your book.

SAM: Starlight.

LAURA: Starpoint Conservatory. Starpoint Conservatory.

MATT: Yes, there you go.

LAURA: Starlight Academy.

MATT: (laughs)

TALIESIN: Excellent.

MATT: That's the sequel to the Starlight Express.

LAURA: Feel free to correct me--

MATT: It's their college years.

LAURA: -- any time I do that.

MATT: But they're extra horny. Somehow more horny than Starlight Express. Trains fucking, y'all. All right, on that note, we're going to have a break.

LIAM: Wow.

MATT: We'll see you back here in a little bit. (laughs)

SAM: Hey! Gods above us. Dragons attacking together! It's like the end of the world! And what exactly is the plan against four dragons? Fuck shit up! This is gonna be fun! I am very flammable! How about we get a drink? I hope you fall into lava, asshat! Oh, that's a new record. Usually it takes us ten minutes to get kicked out of a palace. Vox Machina. These weapons were created to strike down the gods. Find them to defeat the dragons. I got a beard! -We pissed it off. -We do have that effect on people. We're trying to save the world! Look out! You are super fucked up. That's new. We need to get inside that dragon. Through a mouth full of acid? No way. The other way. Oh, God. My balls are ice cubes. -What are you-- -Don't you worry. -Uncle Groggy is going to keep you warm. -I hate th-- I-- This is actually kind of cozy. A bounce, a bounce, a bounce, a go. —Let me help. Oh, hey. Neat trick. Not bad. —That kind of brings me back to Silas. Remember when you— you melted his face off? I like cold! Makes my nipples tingly. So, uh, how you feelin', buddy? Cause, you know, lately, you've been real fixated on— —Oh, yeah, just a sec, Pike. —Come here! Woah, Grog what are you? Don't you worry, Scanlan. Uncle Grog is gonna keep you warm! [protesting grunts] [resigned, comforted sigh﻿] Huh! This is actually kind of cozy. But Grog, that sword seems to— Oh! you wanna bouncy? Come on! A-bounce, a-bounce, a-bounce we go! Hey Critters, Laura Bailey here to guide you through what's new in the Critical Role shop. This is pretty badass. Go ahead, darling. Treat yourself. Look at this. Isn't it fashion. So much fashion happening here. Ooh so comfy cozy. You need this? You probably need this. I mean The Traveler always says, impulse purchases are a good decision. Aww they're so mini. And hey if you want, you can head over to the Critical Role shop right now. (peaceful music) (festive music) (door unlocking) ♪ Upon a sea that's tossed and gray, ♪ ♪ We fight to keep the dreams at bay ♪ ♪ For in our sleep we hope for peace ♪ ♪ Lest the nightmares have their way ♪ ♪ Uk'otoa Uk'otoa keep him locked away ♪ ♪ Chilling thoughts and watchful eyes ♪ ♪ Await for those who seek the prize ♪ ♪ But all is not is it was thought ♪ ♪ For the serpent always lies ♪ ♪ Uk'otoa Uk'otoa keep him locked away ♪ ♪ And if the creature is released ♪ ♪ Our peaceful days will surely cease ♪ ♪ The winds will wail as waves assail ♪ ♪ To herald what lurks beneath ♪ ♪ Uk'otoa Uk'otoa keep him locked away ♪ ♪ A haunted fog comes rolling through ♪ ♪ The sea begins to toss and strew ♪ ♪ With cutlass and cannon we make a stand ♪ ♪ Though little might it do ♪ ♪ Uk'otoa Uk'otoa keep him locked away ♪ ♪ As the serpent rises tall ♪ ♪ His many eyes now seeing all ♪ ♪ The ship won't keep above the deep ♪ ♪ If our steadfast sailors fall ♪ ♪ Uk'otoa Uk'otoa keep him locked away ♪ ♪ A flick of tongue and sharpened teeth ♪ ♪ The only gifts that he'll bequeath ♪ ♪ And those who fought to stay aloft ♪ ♪ Will be swallowed and drowned beneath ♪ ♪ Uk'otoa Uk'otoa keep him locked away ♪ ♪ So heed the words from sailors old ♪ ♪ Beware the dreams with eyes of gold ♪ ♪ And though he'll speak of quests and powers ♪ ♪ Blessed ignore the lies you're told ♪ ♪ Uk'otoa Uk'otoa keep him locked away ♪ ♪ Uk'otoa Uk'otoa keep him locked away ♪ ♪ Uk'otoa Uk'otoa keep him locked away ♪ ♪ Uk'otoa Uk'otoa keep him locked away ♪ (waves splashing) (dramatic music) (playful music) (typewriter clicks) (peaceful music) Narrator: Holly Mistletoe thought she had it all. As you can plainly see, sales are up 7%. Narrator: But when she finds herself back in her hometown for a very special holiday... I can't believe I have to come back to my hometown. It's so provincial. (gasps) Seamus? Seamus O'Shamrock? I didn't know you still lived here. You own and operate a small, charming coffee and pastry shop? Only when I'm not raising horses. Narrator: She'll discover just how much her life was missing. Mm, has anyone ever told you you're a really good baker? Has anyone ever told you you're more adorable than the custom emotes you can use in Critical Role's professionally-moderated chat with a Twitch subscription? Happy Valentine's Day. (gasps) Narrator: This holiday season or that holiday season or whatever holiday season it might be... What is it? Void Tech is going to foreclose on the horse ranch. They can't do that, not on the 4th of July! With the proceeds from our wholesome Halloween haunted house, we can raise enough money to save the horse ranch from your greedy company, Mr. Fatstacks. Damn you, Mistletoe. If it hadn't been for your big city business savvy, I would've been able to fool those small town provincial bumpkins. We may be provincial, but we have values, like watching episodes of Critical Role before they go on YouTube with a Twitch subscription Fiddle Faddle! (groans) Narrator: Stand up and celebrate. Eat my feelings. (growling) Narrator: Make every day a holiday. Oh, okay. Boop. (sneezes) No. Narrator: And give the gift of love. Is this... A subscription to Critical Role? I can gift those with my Twitch subscription to Critical Role. Yes? Narrator: Laura Bailey is Holly Mistletoe. Don't be violent. That's not romantic. Narrator: Travis Willingham is Seamus O'Shamrock and featuring Sam Riegel as Maxamillion Fatstacks in "A Holiday Subscription for Love: The Ballad of Mistletoes and Shamrocks Part 2"

BREAK ENDS -->

Part II
MATT: Welcome back.

(laughter)

TRAVIS: It's because we love you so much.

MATT: I know.

(laughter)

TRAVIS: From our hearts.

TALIESIN: That was for us.

TRAVIS: And our gooches.

(laughter)

MATT: I know. So.

(laughter)

MATT: Returning to where we were, the fresh evening air in the city of Yios, here in the center of Lake Koron, you've disembarked from the Silver Sun in the skyport, far above this part of the city and watch as Xandis and crew engage with what appears to be-- what would be the-- There it is-- the port captain of this portion of the city. As you begin to step along, you can see there's not a whole lot of business happening. The one other ship that's docked has probably been long docked here and other than a few individuals that are keeping looks out and a few armored figures that are guarding the upper portion of the skyport, you do see a female half-elf that comes up, dressed in a nice, light blue robe that flows behind as she approaches, platinum blonde hair that forms a bubble helmet around her head as she glides up to Xandis and the rest of you and goes, (New Jersey accent) "Oh, hello, welcome to Yios."

(laughter)

TALIESIN: Oh boy.

MATT: "What's your business here, and how long will you be staying?"

LAURA: Oh my god, oh my god.

ASHLEY: Oh my god.

SAM: I love her.

LIAM: It's a personal attack on me and my home state.

LAURA: Ah.

MARISHA: (laughs)

SAM: Smiley day to you. What's your name, young miss?

MATT: "I'm Port Captain Lyrios. I'm looking over the port as its captain, hence the title--"

SAM: Lee Rios, or Lerios?

MATT: "Lyrios."

SAM: Lyrios.

MATT: "Once again I ask, what is your business here, and how long will you be staying?" And Captain Xandis goes, "I imagine we're probably not staying too long?"

LAURA: No, I don't think we will be. Oh, well, we were hoping to do some learning at the seminary.

MATT: "Do you have an approximation as to how long your ship's going to be docked in here?"

TRAVIS: Few days, I think, right?

LIAM: Week at the absolute maximum, but probably not even near that.

MATT: "Well, we have daily rates for docking here in the skyport, and we also have a weekly rate, so if you want to pay in advance, it's cheaper if you get the entire weekly rate as a bulk, and we could take it day to day from there, if you think you're going to be staying around long enough. Otherwise, you're looking at about 10 gold a day docking fee or about 50 for the entire week."

SAM: We should probably do the discount--

TALIESIN: Can we up the week before the end of the first week and get weeks in a row and keep stacking that? Or does it just go daily after the first week?

MATT: "No, if you come and make sure that before the week is out that you want to re-up for a secondary week, we can make the adjustments accordingly."

TALIESIN: Okay, it's good to know.

SAM: Let's just go for the week.

TALIESIN: I think so.

SAM: Yeah.

TALIESIN: All right.

MATT: "All right. And who's the captain of this ship?"

LAURA: Captain Xandis.

SAM: Xandis.

MATT: (Xandis) "That would be me, but they're the owners, so money's from them." (Lyrios) "Very well, I will accept your 50 gold purchase of your week-long time docking here in Yios."

LAURA: Here you are.

MATT: "Thank you kindly."

MARISHA: You got all of it?

LAURA: Sure.

MARISHA: Dope.

LIAM: Thanks, Imogen.

MARISHA: I mean, thanks.

MATT: With that, the port captain begins to assign people to--

SAM and LAURA: Dope!

LIAM: (like Laudna) Dope.

MATT: -- watch the ship to do a quick look over of the immediate contents to ensure nothing gets taken, everything stays in check as they do their own passes on it. With that, Xandis walks past, "All right, I guess the night is ours. So you have never been here, let me take you into the lounge. Come on, let me show you." With that, Xandis, head glowing from the nearby torchlight from their smooth tiefling head, the horns curve behind. Leads you down a slightly domed entryway that leads into a staircase below the skyport top. Upon walking inside the staircase, you can immediately smell, it's a mixture of lavender perfumes and a bit of pipe smoke, immediately hits you as you begin to traverse below and you can already hear the sounds of chatter and conversation, laughter, and music from the interior.

LAURA: I slowly start hanging back, walking slower.

MATT: Okay. Heading down to the interior of the lower chamber within, you can see now there is a low lit sitting area, the top of this tower where the skyport is built onto it, has a number of windows that overlook the beautiful city around you and there are tables that are pressed up against them to the sides, you can see there are large, heavy cushioned sitting spaces, and there are tables everywhere, and already you can see there are a number of musicians set to different corners, taking onto their own little moods. People can find the space that best befit them. It's a very nice interior in here. It's probably not the least expensive place to stay, but it definitely has one of the best views, you can imagine, even glancing out the sides and looking about the clientele here, there is definitely an affluent air to the inside of this chamber. Nobody seems to pay mind to your arrival at the moment. They're too busy with their own business and conversations. But you do see a handful of tables out there where there is a deep red texture across the top and you can see there are dealers set up for various games of chance. There appears to be a bar towards the back end where there are two individuals who are wearing these similarly colored, light blue and gold trimmed vests as to the port captain's attire, that are in the process of serving individuals that come by. Probably about 20 or so people in this lounge at the moment. It looks like it does spiral down to a lower floor. There's about 12 or so up here, and there's a spiral staircase that descends to a lower part of the tavern, which you can look over into the inside and that's where the rest of the lounge continues, deeper into the tower.

LIAM: Did you say, apropos of nothing, is this tower that we're on, that the skyport's on, are we on the lowest tier of the lake or the highest tier?

MATT: This right here, from what you can tell, would be the middle one.

LIAM: The middle one, okay.

MATT: Yes.

SAM: It's called the Lakeport Skyport?

MATT: The Lakecap Skyport.

SAM: Lakecap Skyport and Lounge and casino and tavern.

MATT: Those are insinuated in the title.

TALIESIN: I turn to Imogen. This place is really fucking loud, do you want a drink? I'm going to get a drink.

LAURA: Yeah, I'm just going to be over...

TALIESIN: How heavy of a drink?

LAURA: Not.

TALIESIN: Oh, I'm going to do a thing, okay.

MARISHA: Are you all right, darling?

LAURA: Oh, of course, yeah, we just--

LIAM: Think it's the crowds.

MARISHA: I can't help but-- The moment we landed, you've been a bit listless.

LAURA: Oh, well, I mean, you know, we've been out in nature for quite a while now, so it's just, it's strange to come back into something new. Yeah, I mean, my-my-my mom could potentially be here. It's strange that the city's just so beautiful and I just feel so scared of it.

LIAM: Well, you got some company.

LAURA: Yeah.

LIAM: You're not going to stop being afraid of the moment, but--

SAM: Do you want to reach out to her again, or maybe wait until we know more about what we're doing?

LAURA: Maybe when we're not here, but yeah, I think I probably should. She might not even be here. She-she-she might not even say if she is, you know? Plus, we have the seminary to look into.

SAM: Sure, which she's been to?

LAURA: Yeah, that's how I found out she was even connected to all this. There was an essay written by one of the professors there that included her.

SAM: Well, then maybe answers are right around the corner for you.

LAURA: Yeah.

MARISHA: I think it's smart to be cautious. You know, it's easy to get charmed by appearances, but to your point, we know what's going on.

SAM: Speaking of folks who we don't know might be here, do you want to check that orb?

MARISHA: Oh! Yes!

MATT: (laughs) Pull it out and look unto the orb, it appears dark. There is no sign of a glow nearby.

LAURA: I hate not knowing if she got rid of the tracker--

MARISHA: Or got rid of it.

TALIESIN: I come up with a tray of various glasses and start handing them out. There's a big frozen weird copper thing with ginger for you. Something they called a Corpse Reviver. I don't know, good luck.

SAM: Whoa!

TALIESIN: I just bought--

SAM: What if it works?

(laughter)

TRAVIS: "What if it works?"

MARISHA: We could have gone here the whole time!

TALIESIN: A weird little cup of apparently some chips you can use in these things, but they're made of metal, so here you go.

SAM: Hey, thank you, Ashton.

TALIESIN: I don't know, but it's got a straw that does some weird shit.

ASHLEY: Oh, what a fun little thing.

TALIESIN: A weird little lavender martini thing with I don't even know what kind of fruit. What was apparently a very nice pale ale, and then I just asked for something that tastes like liquor and leather, and this is apparently what it is, and it's--

LAURA: Ashton, this is so thoughtful!

LIAM: I can smell it from here. Thank you, Ashton.

TALIESIN: Yeah, no problem. I needed a drink and since, you know, when in--

SAM: Aww, big old softy.

LIAM: Where'd Xandis go?

SAM: Oh, you hurt?

TRAVIS: Maybe.

MATT: Xandis is currently off to the side of a table and is playing a dice game--

SAM: I'll heal you! Cure Wounds!

MATT: -- with their large over the shoulder sack onto the side of the table where they're at, and they're currently engaged with three other people at the table and the dealer.

SAM: Does anyone fancy a game of gambling or whatever?

TRAVIS: Yes! No. I mean no, no.

ASHLEY: Well, we should try, right?

SAM: I don't know.

TALIESIN: It can be a very--

MARISHA: I'm guessing we're staying here? It seems like we're staying here.

SAM: It feels like it's easy.

LAURA: Yeah, why not, let's stay at the lounge.

TALIESIN: Anything, Orym, anything looking interesting about these people? I don't know, I was going to take a look and then I didn't.

LIAM: Woo.

TRAVIS and MARISHA: (laugh)

ASHLEY and LIAM: Woo.

TRAVIS: Ah-woo!

LIAM: I meant to say it--

TRAVIS: Ca-ooh-kie Crisp!

LIAM: -- and I just hadn't.

MATT: ♪ Ya-hoo ooh-ooh ♪

LIAM: Orym only sips at his ale, and is definitely looking for fuckery.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: What if there's-- Are there any games that are around where there's lots of people congregated that maybe we could chat up and get some information about the place?

TRAVIS: Yeah, plus, if you spend enough money, sometimes they comp you a room, hook you up with a dope-ass suite, give you all sorts of shit, get you all liquored up, so you spend more.

LAURA: Of course Chetney would know about casinos.

TRAVIS: What are you talking about? Of course. I'm not allowed in some places.

MARISHA: We know.

SAM: What's your game? What's your--?

TRAVIS: Anything dice or colors or cards.

SAM: That's all of them, I think.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Is there something with smells? I assume that would be your thing, too, I don't know.

TRAVIS: Shit.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MARISHA: Oh! Can you--

TALIESIN: Think about that.

MARISHA: -- count cards by smelling them?

TRAVIS: (gasps) I've never tried.

MARISHA: That would be awesome.

TRAVIS: First time for anything.

SAM: Like first, you mark them real quick, and then slip them back into the deck.

TRAVIS: They keep the cards on the table.

SAM: Oh okay.

LIAM: Just give a little squirt to each one. Ah, smells like a 16.

(laughter)

SAM: 16 in a deck of cards?

LIAM: This is Exandria!

SAM: Oh yeah, you're right.

(laughter)

TALIESIN: Are we being lowkey or are we making a splash? What's the plan?

TRAVIS: Spending money, comp room.

LAURA: I don't think it's good to make a splash anywhere.

LIAM: Lowkey, please.

LAURA: With things the way they are.

TALIESIN: All right.

LIAM: I think we should maybe get something to eat, share a drink and then we're staying, we're going to lodge here?

SAM and TALIESIN: Sure.

LIAM: Play a game?

MARISHA: I'll look for a back table that's kind of away from the crowds for Imogen.

MATT: Okay. Easy enough to find. It looks like this place is designed to house upwards, a healthy 60 to 100 people at peak party atmosphere. There's maybe about 20 total. So it's a little sparse at this hour.

MARISHA: Okay. Ah, get a table in the back. I'm going to make Pâté hold the fort for us.

MATT: "Don't worry. I'm watching it for you!"

MARISHA: Good boy.

LAURA: No one will sit at this table.

LIAM: Does it look like there's anyone to worry about in here?

MATT: Make a perception check.

LIAM: Ooh, two sixes, 15, not that great, 15.

MATT: 15, glancing around, the clientele is quite varied. You can see there are some in various elements of Marquesian garb, you can see some folk that are wearing clothing that look like they probably are from either Issylra or Wildemount, they're definitely not from around here. Everyone here is dressed well. There's definitely an air of presenting their wealth, whether it be through jewelry, attire, or both. As you, especially with your passive perception, which is now--

LIAM: 29.

MATT: -- 29, you catch all manner of scents through the air. There is definitely a battle of the perfumes and colognes within this chamber, and the scents very much befit the ostentatious presentation of each individual as you pass by. But you watch as many folks who are playing games are also very much keeping tabs on each other. The air seems to be both jovial and with a subterranean layer of business and gathering the essence of the others in the space around it.

LIAM: Some rounders in here.

MATT: You do also see there are armored guards, four of them within the chamber, two up the top, two in the bottom, that are keeping to the back. They look like they have heavy maces that hang from belt loops on one side and a round shield on the other, just a small, arm-kept one. They all have these light half-cloaks that go over the shoulders that have the same deep blue with gold trim coloration as to what you saw people here are wearing, and they're just keeping an eye, making sure that nothing untoward happens in this space.

LIAM: In the various--

TALIESIN: "Logan's Run" vibe from a lot of this, I'm very excited. I'm excited to actually see a little bit. Yeah, there's so much there, with the flowy pale.

LIAM: There were--

MATT: (laughs) Another table erupts as someone throws down a hand, and people bang the table, laugh, clap the shoulder of the winner, and they go back into the next setup.

TALIESIN: There's stairs going up and down, aren't they?

MATT: Yes, there are two floors to the lounge.

TALIESIN: I'm going to go to floor two really quick, just check it out. Anybody want to?

SAM: I'll-- Oh.

ASHLEY: Yeah. What?

SAM: Oh. Ah. Oh.

LAURA: You can both go.

SAM: We'll both go join you!

TALIESIN: I was going to say, it's one or the other, I can't take both.

SAM: Are you guys going to be okay? Everyone's got such serious faces.

TALIESIN: We're just going to be real quick.

LAURA: No, everything's fine.

TALIESIN: I'm going to check it out.

LAURA: We're great. Go.

MARISHA: I'm going to order some calamari.

LAURA: (laughs)

TRAVIS: From a casino? (laughter) That's one way to go.

SAM: The shellfish is great.

LAURA: It's a fishing village!

TALIESIN: Didn't we just get over the negative one to all your skills, you really want to go right back to that? Right back to that?

MARISHA: Maybe there are lake squid, I don't know.

TALIESIN: Get some breakfast sushi while you're at it, Jesus.

SAM: We're going upstairs with Ashton.

MATT: Downstairs or upstairs?

TALIESIN: Downstairs, I mean--

SAM: Downstairs.

MATT: You guys are upstairs, you would be going down.

SAM: We're going downstairs with Ashton.

TALIESIN: I'm going to be a little inappropriately fast down those stairs, because that's what stairs are for.

MATT: Okay, yeah. Clamber down.

(laughter)

MARISHA: You run really fast.

TALIESIN: Yeah, I just hop over everyone, you know?

MATT: Yeah. The lower floor's a little more dense. There's maybe three more people here than there were above. But being closer to the base of the tower, you're still a little ways up. There's probably a number of floors below you, but the lounges are very much the apex before you get to the skyport. You can see there is one table, actually there are two tables that are people playing card games. There are three tables with some sort of a dice game, and the rest of them are open tables for folks that are in the process of having a conversation while sharing drinks.

TALIESIN: It's just more of the same, I suppose.

SAM: You want to play something?

TALIESIN: Do they have dice upstairs too or no?

MATT: They had it, yeah. It varies.

TALIESIN: I'm saying, it's a little more crowded. This is just a bit more people, do we want to-- We're trying to keep it lowkey, right?

SAM: It doesn't matter, we're in a totally different city.

TALIESIN: I mean-- All right, let's hop upstairs and play some fucking dice.

SAM: Okay.

TALIESIN: Too many people.

SAM: Carry me up the stairs, it's easier.

TALIESIN: I just pick him up.

(laughter)

MATT: All right. You drag him up the steps with you.

TALIESIN: Do you want to fuck with something?

SAM: (laughs)

ASHLEY: Well, yeah, but maybe give me a second.

TALIESIN: Yeah. Do you need a distraction?

TRAVIS: She's got to poop.

(laughter)

LAURA: I just got to poop.

ASHLEY: Yeah, just got to take a shit.

TRAVIS: All that canned oxygen.

MATT: Just a little pellet trail leading through the casino.

(laughter)

TRAVIS: Fearne, no!

ASHLEY: Can I look around and see if there's anyone watching us?

TALIESIN: That's a good call.

MATT: Make a perception check.

ASHLEY: Okay.

SAM: Come on, Fearne, big roll!

(laughter)

SAM: Cry.

ASHLEY: Natural one.

(laughter)

TRAVIS: Goddamn it! Get out!

LAURA: That's what happens when you demand it.

MATT: You have never felt more stealthy and unseen in a public space before. You could accomplish anything and nobody would see you.

MARISHA: She's standing in the middle of the room spinning in circles.

(laughter)

LIAM: Two feet taller than everyone else.

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: Mm-hmm.

TRAVIS: Ma'am, you need to get off the table.

MARISHA: Yeah. (laughter)

(laughter)

TALIESIN: Why do you look like a deer in candlelight, what's going on?

MARISHA: "A deer in candlelight."

TALIESIN: Well, there's no headlights, I had to do something.

MARISHA: Yeah, no, it's great.

SAM: (laughs)

ASHLEY: I was just looking around and (whispers) I don't think anybody can see us.

SAM: (laughs) Yeah, maybe.

ASHLEY: Yeah?

TALIESIN: I'll go with it.

SAM: Be yourself, do your thing.

ASHLEY: I mean, nobody's paying attention to us.

SAM: So what do you want to try?

ASHLEY: Well, I don't know. I don't know if-- Isn't that the time to play the game? I just want to make sure that maybe we all--

SAM: Yeah, we can play a game.

ASHLEY: Should we all stick together? Keep eyes on each other?

SAM: I think we should stick with you, yes.

ASHLEY: Well, should we go back upstairs and play the game or do you want to play the game down here?

TRAVIS: I think you just cut loose. What happens in the Lakecap--

ASHLEY: Hey, Chetney.

SAM: Oh, you came down here, too?

TRAVIS: -- Skyport and Lounge stays in the Lakecap Skyport and Lounge.

(laughter)

SAM: And tavern.

TRAVIS: Mm-hmm.

SAM: And tavern and casino.

TRAVIS: Et cetera.

TALIESIN: I mostly wanted to make sure that everything was-- That there wasn't anything weird going on here. Anyone would recognize anything like that?

SAM: Play a game.

TALIESIN: Oh, we can play.

SAM: You want to play a game? Play a game.

ASHLEY: Well, just hold your horses a minute. Should we get a lay of the land here?

TALIESIN: Let's do a little walkabout. Let's do a little walkabout.

ASHLEY: Oh yeah, let's do a walk about. We're totally--

TALIESIN: Nonchalantly, we're going to walk through and I'm going to try and squeeze through the crowd.

SAM: As we walk around, I'm going to Detect Thoughts, just general Detect Thoughts.

TALIESIN: Hell yeah!

ASHLEY: That's a good idea.

MATT: General vibe. Okay, okay.

SAM: Focusing on the players at some of the tables.

TALIESIN: I'm going to be muscle. I'm going to look like muscle.

MATT: Okay. So as you walk through, you can pick up surface thoughts and bits of conversation that are too muddled to really pick up with your passive perception, but you pick up the thoughts with the mind. One person's discussing, is like, "Stevens is complaining about something hunting the depths of the Winepebble Shores, scaring off all the fish and wrecking their yields. I personally wonder if it's an excuse for poor effort, honestly." You drift past another mind.

LAURA: A new task has been added to your mission log.

(laughter)

MATT: Another mind says, "Oh, the solstice is coming up. I've already arranged a viewing party for our friends at the estate." Another one says, "I heard there were Stratos spies caught outside of Doan, such intrigue. Let's keep an ear out and see if we can invest in arms and supplies just in case. It could make for a good opportunity." And you're getting this smattering of thoughts and people having conversations and definitely there's an air of societal presentation and business wheeling and dealing outside of the mindset of just playing games.

SAM: Okay, that's all?

LIAM: These are all thoughts you're picking up?

SAM: Yeah.

LIAM: "I'm going to go take a double decker in a bathroom."

(laughter)

TRAVIS: Upper decker.

MATT: "Shouldn't have had those oysters."

MARISHA: "Double decker."

MATT: But yeah, there are--

LIAM: Three-tiered lake.

(laughter)

MARISHA: Yeah, double decker is the first and second tiers.

LIAM: You got to do it at--

MARISHA: Yeah.

(laughter)

LIAM: In the back, in the front, and on--

(laughter)

SAM: God.

TALIESIN: Damn it. This is ruining everything.

SAM: Disgusting.

(laughter)

TALIESIN: Sorry.

SAM: Oh, he's rolling!

LIAM: I didn't--

LAURA: Oh no!

LIAM: I didn't think it, that person over there did.

TRAVIS: Orym, get off the table!

(laughter)

TRAVIS: Jeez!

SAM: Stratos spies?

TALIESIN: What? What are you talking about, Stratos?

SAM: Sorry, I'm listening to some thoughts.

TALIESIN: Oh, I'll shut up then.

SAM: So the Stratos Throne I thought rules this area, so why would there be Stratos spies here?

MATT: Stratos Throne is the Taloned Highlands to the west. They were at war with Aeshanadoor.

SAM: Oh, got it, got it, got it.

TALIESIN: So this is still just tense then, maybe.

MATT: Yeah, it's off and on tense. It's been 20 years of a truce.

TALIESIN: All right.

ASHLEY: I'm going to saunter up to one of the guards down here.

TALIESIN: Oh boy.

SAM: Guards.

MATT: You approach a half-giant wearing the shoulder pauldrons, a bit of chainmail visible from beneath, and of course the half-cloak over it. The helmets here are interesting, because they're like skull caps that curl up past the ear into these tusk-looking blades, to mimic tusks on the head itself. The majority of the guards, you can see the four that are in here, two of them are full orc, one of them looks to be a hardy-looking dwarf and the half-giant that you approach. He's standing there barrel-chested, bit of a wide torso, squat-thick legs, armored up and gives you a glance as you approach.

ASHLEY: Hi.

MATT: "Hello."

ASHLEY: I'm new to town and I just wanted to see if there was anything I should watch out for, anything going on that you're like, oh my goodness, you being here alone, you should watch out for it.

MATT: "I mean, you should always keep a hand on your coin purse."

ASHLEY: Sure, sure, sure, sure, sure. People take stuff all the time.

MATT: "If you're looking to charter a boat, maybe take a few options and then choose the cheapest."

ASHLEY: Oh, that's good advice.

MATT: "This time of year, I would maybe avoid the oysters."

LAURA: (laughs)

MARISHA: Shit.

ASHLEY: Okay.

TALIESIN: A little late.

LAURA: Too late. Too late.

SAM: Ask him about the Seminary.

ASHLEY: Do I hear you in my head?

SAM: No, I'm just next to you.

(laughter)

ASHLEY: Oh. How about the--

(laughter)

ASHLEY: How about the Seminary?

MATT: "The Aydinlan Seminary?"

ASHLEY: One more time.

MATT: "The Aydinlan Seminary."

ASHLEY: Yes, that's what it was, I was just making sure you were thinking of the same one that I was.

MATT: "You're a student. You here to learn?"

ASHLEY: I'm a professor.

MATT: "Oh my apologies."

ASHLEY: It's okay.

MATT: "You are a professor of The Seminary?"

ASHLEY: Well, no, I'm a traveling professor, and I'm here to go to there.

(laughter)

MARISHA: To go to there.

TALIESIN: Go to there.

MATT: Make a deception check.

TALIESIN: That was amazing! Oh, that was amazing.

(laughter)

LIAM: Roll deception, Liz Lemon.

ASHLEY: Wait, what am I doing?

MATT: Deception.

MARISHA: Low rolls are--

ASHLEY: 10.

MARISHA: -- for skinny hoes.

MATT: 10, okay.

(laughter)

MATT: He goes, "Okay. Well, you are welcome to go to the Seminary. Do you know where to find it?"

ASHLEY: No. Where do I go?

MATT: "It's in the Dominion Ring."

ASHLEY: It's in the Dominion--

MATT: "The northern most ring."

ASHLEY: Dominion Ring, I see.

MATT: "Kind of to the southwest of the Seat of Valor."

ASHLEY: Oh, okay.

SAM: I love Dominion Rings with a little mustard.

ASHLEY: What are all the rings called?

MARISHA: It's so clever that they named the calamari the Dominion Rings.

(laughter)

MATT: "We're above the Endeavor Ring right now, the central ring.

SAM: The Endeavor Ring.

MATT: "It's the more business- oriented portion of the city. Mercantile, marketplaces. There's the Dominion Ring to the north, and to the south is the Venture Ring. It's the more heavily urban neighborhoods, fishing docks and the large harbor that goes to the Lapis Outlet and off to the ocean. But welcome."

ASHLEY: Thank you.

MATT: "Professor."

ASHLEY: Thank you. Calloway. Professor Calloway.

MATT: "Professor Calloway."

ASHLEY: Yeah.

SAM: Dark Arts.

ASHLEY: Where did you get your hat?

SAM: (laughs)

TALIESIN: And it begins.

MATT: "They're part of the sentry uniform. It is given out at the end of training as a sentry within the city."

ASHLEY: Oh, okay.

MATT: "So it was gifted. It's part of my job."

ASHLEY: Oh, so you didn't have to pay for it, you just got it for free?

MATT: "Correct. I do not actually own it, the city owns it. I'm merely borrowing it as I fill the position."

ASHLEY: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

MATT: "But if I work at this long enough and retire, I think I do get to keep it."

SAM: (laughs)

ASHLEY: That's pretty cool. That's a nice little gift at the end of things. All right. Well, I guess that's it. That's all I was thinking of. FCG, what do I say?

TALIESIN: Actually, Professor Calloway--

SAM: You did great.

TALIESIN: -- if you don't mind.

ASHLEY: Oh yes.

TALIESIN: Hi. I work for Professor Calloway. I'm going to have a lot of free time while she's busy with work.

ASHLEY: He's my TA.

MATT: "You work for the professor?"

TALIESIN: More as a lifting things, moving them, I'm well aware. Is there something fun to do in town that's a little more less this, something rough and tumble, place that absolutely cannot be missed? I don't think I'm ever going to be able to get back here again, it's why I took the trip, It's crazy.

MATT: Make a persuasion check.

TALIESIN: All right.

SAM: You're asking the cops where to go for fun.

LAURA: Yeah.

(laughter)

TALIESIN: Fuck yeah, I am.

SAM: Where can I go to get in trouble?

(laughter)

TALIESIN: It's not even trouble, I just want to know if there's fucking fun places.

TRAVIS: Where do you get your perps?

(laughter)

TALIESIN: 14.

MATT: 14.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: "There's not many places to get into rough and tumble, if that's what you're asking."

TALIESIN: Just not stuffy.

MATT: "This is a place of learning. This is an illuminated cityscape.

TALIESIN: Like a good view, then, just something I can take home.

MATT: Steps aside and gestures to the window about five feet from him that overlooks a beautiful view of the city.

TALIESIN: It does look-- Yeah. These people just make me a little stuffy. Okay, okay.

MATT: "Then step outside."

LIAM: Officer, do you get high?

LAURA: Yeah. Excuse me, where do you get your drugs?

(laughter)

TALIESIN: Actually, you spice? All right.

SAM: We did great, we did great.

ASHLEY: I agree.

TALIESIN: Yeah, yeah.

LAURA: You guys did great.

MATT: "Good luck, Professor Calloway."

ASHLEY: Thank you, kindly.

TALIESIN: (laughs)

MARISHA: Oh, Chetney.

TRAVIS: Hmm.

MARISHA: Do you plan on gambling?

TRAVIS: I've already lost 100 gold.

MARISHA: Oh jeez.

(laughter)

MARISHA: Well, I have an idea--

TRAVIS: Hmm?

MARISHA: -- of how to maybe make that back.

TRAVIS: I'm all ears.

MARISHA: You see, I'm not really-- I love games, but I haven't really gambled much, because most places I go into, if I ever tried to gamble, they'd be like, "Ah, hag, get out! Blah!" But--

TRAVIS: There was a hag in there?

MARISHA: Well--

TRAVIS: Hag? Okay.

MARISHA: Yes.

LAURA: There was always hags.

MARISHA: There's always hags, yeah.

LAURA: People were shouting things.

MARISHA: But, you see, Pâté. Hi, Pâté.

MARISHA: We've been--

MATT: "Hi."

MARISHA: -- chatting a little bit because he's got a little special ability where he can go invisible, and I can see through Pâté's eyes and I could send you messages. So if there's anything in terms of looking at other people's cards or looking to stack the deck, as they say in the gambling world. Do they say that? I don't know, but I'm really excited. I'm sorry.

TRAVIS: Is anybody listening to us talk?

LAURA: Yeah, I know as you say that--

MATT: Pâté is.

LAURA: -- I'm going to say in Laudna's head: Maybe you should talk a little quieter.

MARISHA: I'm sorry. Right, but I'm just throwing it out there.

TRAVIS: I'm in. How long does Pâté stay like that?

MARISHA: I believe...

TALIESIN: I like that you're just--

MARISHA: Turn invisible--

TALIESIN: -- staring at the table for a second.

MARISHA: Oh, until he attacks anything.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

MARISHA: So he just stays like that.

MATT: "I can just sort of disappear for a while, it's great."

TRAVIS: What about the talking? Can you make sure he doesn't do that?

MARISHA: Well, I think we can communicate-- Well, he doesn't have to talk at all, he just has to see.

TRAVIS: Okay, let's do it.

MARISHA: I can see through his eyes.

TRAVIS: Although, I'm mindful of getting kicked out the first night, the first hour of us being here.

MARISHA: Mm, mm-hmm.

TRAVIS: Mm-hmm.

MARISHA: So we just can't get caught.

TRAVIS: Yep, pretty much.

MARISHA: Well, it's up to you. The option is there.

LIAM: Imogen and Orym are halfway into a game of dots and boxes, just listening to this conversation.

LAURA: Yeah, we're listening to everything, shaking our heads in unison.

MATT: So Orym, you do note, with your passive perception of infinity.

LIAM: That she's cheating at dots and boxes?

MATT: Yes, there is that.

LIAM: Okay.

TRAVIS: Son of a bitch.

LAURA: It's only because I can read his thoughts and know exactly where he's going to go next.

MATT: You are one of the worst people to play those sort of games with.

(laughter)

ASHLEY: Get out of my head!

MATT: Got you through school, real popular.

LAURA: Yeah, no problem.

MARISHA: Oh yeah, she can just read thoughts.

TRAVIS: Yeah. She'd kill at poker.

MARISHA: That's probably easier. Yeah, she would smash.

LAURA: Yeah, I was going to say.

MATT: But.

LIAM: But.

MATT: Yeah, the two sentries that are keeping guard here are definitely keeping an eye on the strange crew that just arrived and are bouncing around.

LIAM: That's us.

MATT: That's you.

LIAM: Yes.

TALIESIN and MATT: Yeah. They're not aggressive, but they're definitely like-- They're looking over the room, and then checking in on y'all. Looking over the room and checking in on y'all. You're the new kids and you don't really dress like a lot of the other clienteles. They're just keeping an eye.

LIAM: I write that above the dots and boxes games, so that Imogen knows.

LAURA: Mm. Mm-hmm.

TRAVIS: I will tell you this, most gambling, it's usually against the house and the dealers, they don't really know what they're even playing with. It takes the human factor out of it. Unless we sit down for like a--

MARISHA: Like a long time.

TRAVIS: Yeah, some kind of a game that's against somebody else.

LAURA: In your head you hear: Just so you know, I don't think it's the smartest idea to cheat. Maybe tonight, just-- Orym has let us know that the guards are definitely watching us.

TRAVIS: Whose head are you in?

LAURA: Laudna's.

MARISHA: Both of us.

MARISHA: Apparently, we're--

TRAVIS: Huh?

MARISHA: Apparently, we're drawing focus.

MATT: (Pâté) "Let me know when to go disappearing."

MARISHA: Hang on. Hold, hold. I love the enthusiasm. Oh, the tenacity, you're so good. Maybe it's a bad idea to cheat tonight, but maybe tomorrow night.

TRAVIS: It's on.

MARISHA: All right.

LAURA: Once they're more used to us.

TRAVIS: We'll scout for some marks.

MARISHA: I like it.

TRAVIS: Yep.

TALIESIN: We, I assume, are coming up by now.

SAM: Sure.

TALIESIN: Guards are dicks, just saying.

LIAM: At any point, while keeping one eye on the guards, have they been speaking to each other at all?

MATT: No.

LIAM: Okay. They're just both eyeballing us?

MATT: Yeah.

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: They're just mindful of the new clientele.

LIAM: They're doing their job.

MATT: Yeah.

SAM: So we're not playing anything, is that what's happening?

LAURA: Oh no, go play.

LIAM: Go play, play a game.

LAURA: We're here for the night. I mean, we will be once we get a room.

TALIESIN: I want to hit some dice.

LIAM: I want to play around with something. I've never done this ever.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

TRAVIS: What kind of games do we see?

MATT: The two games you see available here, and there's a few tables that run them. There's Griffon's Wall, which is a dice-based game in which the dealer and the player roll 2d10, and then they can hit and roll another 2d10 to try and see who's the closest to 21 without going over.

ASHLEY: Fun.

LIAM: Nice.

MATT: With a payout. And there's Fork of the Storm, which is a variant of the Gambit of Ord, which is a card game in which the dealer and players all roll a d8, but keep it hidden. They then get to allow a raise, call, or fold, then everyone publicly rolls a d6, can go another round of bets, and then whoever's still in then publicly rolls a d4. Final betting round, and then everyone reveals the d8 that they originally rolled, tally them up and the highest number wins the round.

LIAM: Wow, that's fascinating.

MATT: Doubles on any of the dice get to roll an additional d4 at the end and add it to the value.

LAURA: Doubles on any of the dice. You mean like you got a six and a six between the different dice?

MATT: Correct.

TRAVIS: And where are the slots? The unicorn slots?

LAURA: Enchanted Unicorn, Wheel of Fortune.

MATT: Right, no. Those are in the Love's outside of Reno.

LAURA: Ghostbusters.

TRAVIS: Werewolf and the Wench.

SAM: (laughing) Ghostbusters.

LIAM: Chetney just spends the next seven hours going: Come on, baby, come on!

TRAVIS: You son of a bitch, hit!

MATT: Big old plastic bucket just filled with coppers.

(laughter)

TRAVIS: I'm playing all three of these.

(laughter)

MATT: That's Reno right there.

TRAVIS: I could get down with Fork of the Storm.

SAM: Yeah, let's go fork some storms.

TRAVIS: Maybe they'll give us a salmon sandwich if we all sit for a minute.

MARISHA: Lake salmon.

TRAVIS: With cream cheese, baby, and a cucumber slice.

MARISHA: So Fork of the Storm, Griffon's what? Griffon?

SAM: Wall.

MATT: Griffon's Wall.

MARISHA: Griffon's Wall. And then what was the other one?

SAM: That's it.

LAURA: Fork of the Storm?

SAM: Fork of the Storm.

TRAVIS: Fjord of the Storm.

TALIESIN: I think I've got the brain for Griffon's Wall.

LIAM: Which one was more complicated?

TRAVIS: Björk Of the Storm.

MATT: Fork of the Storm is the more complicated one.

LAURA: Fjork Of the Storm, yeah.

MATT: Yeah.

LIAM: Fjork of the Storm.

SAM: Two, please, for Fork of the Storm!

LIAM: Three, please, for Fork of the Storm.

MATT: The dealer at the table, this nicely groomed, maybe early 20s human man, very, very short, dark hair, somewhat tanned skin, wearing the similar attire as the other dealers at the tables looks over. "Ah, of course. That's 50 gold buy-in each."

LAURA: Oh, that's really high.

TRAVIS: In. 50 gold. Bam!

LAURA: This is a very expensive casino.

SAM: I don't have any money.

TRAVIS: I got FCG, boom!

TALIESIN: Here's-- okay.

MATT: So, 50 gold, 50 gold.

TALIESIN: Do you want 50 gold?

LIAM: Eh. I go back and sit down and finish dots and squares.

LAURA and MATT: (laugh)

SAM: Actually, can you give me an extra 25?

TRAVIS: What?

SAM: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Oh, sure.

SAM: Thanks.

ASHLEY: Wait, I kind of want to buy in, too.

SAM: Feel free.

ASHLEY: 50 gold.

MATT: "50 gold!"

TALIESIN: I'm going Griffon, because I don't understand how this game fucking works.

TRAVIS: This is fucking expensive, man. God damn.

MATT: All right.

MARISHA: I'll drink my Corpse Reviver and watch, and think of how to cheat.

MATT: So now, everyone, take out your d8s, roll them, and then cover them with your hand.

SAM: Okay, right now?

MATT: Yep.

LIAM: Secret roll.

SAM: Okay, got it.

LIAM: Secret Rollies.

SAM: Secret Rollies.

MATT: "Who wants to raise, fold, or call?"

TRAVIS: We going this way?

MATT: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Call.

SAM: Wait, is there an ante? It's 50?

MATT: The ante's 50, what you paid.

LAURA: You can add--

TRAVIS: A check, essentially.

SAM: I'm going to take my other 25 in chips and hold it in my hand. Changebringer, what should I do? And I'm going to cast Divination. (laughter)

(laughter)

MARISHA: What the fuck?

SAM: It's a 4th-level spell.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: Oh my god!

(laughter)

SAM: It consumes 25 gold pieces worth of--

LAURA: Oh my god.

MATT: I'll remove this dice here.

SAM: -- of something.

LIAM: Bam, Otohan crashes through the skylight!

(laughter)

TRAVIS: Not in the house. Not in the house of gambling.

MATT: (laughing) All right. Hold on.

TALIESIN: This is just-- The chaos.

MATT: Okay. As you feel the coins evaporate in your grasp.

LIAM: They're the component?

SAM: Yeah!

LIAM: Amazing!

(laughter)

TRAVIS: What are you going to raise with?

LIAM: Amazing!

SAM: I don't know.

TRAVIS: I meant to tell you, there's a 20% VIG on this investment.

(laughter)

SAM: Money means nothing to me.

TRAVIS: 30%.

SAM: Okay, Changebringer, I rolled a three, what should I do?

(laughter)

SAM: What should I do?

(laughter)

MATT: The whispered winds of the Changebringer drift through your mind, and you feel a calm summer breeze that drifts through the fields of grass, the grass that, freshly cut, reminds you of your namesake. And the sound of the wind goes, "Fold." (laughter)

(laughter)

SAM: I'm going to fold. Does that mean I get my 50 back?

TRAVIS: You can just check because no one's raised yet.

SAM: Okay. I'll check, I'll check.

MATT: Ignore the Changebringer, why don't you.

LIAM: Hey, Changebringer, suck it.

(laughter)

MARISHA: 4th-level spell.

TALIESIN: Let it ride!

MATT: Call or raise?

ASHLEY: I would like to raise.

SAM: Oh shit.

MATT: How much do you raise?

ASHLEY: 25 gold.

MATT: All right.

SAM: I'm out!

TRAVIS: Not yet! It's not your turn! We go in a circle!

(laughter)

TRAVIS: Noob!

MATT: I'll use this to cover it for now. All right.

TRAVIS: You!

MATT: So dealer puts another 25.

TRAVIS: Matches?

MATT: Matches.

TRAVIS: I'll match.

SAM: Now?

ASHLEY: No, not yet.

TRAVIS: Yeah, now you can--

LAURA: Now.

ASHLEY: Do it now, I'm just kidding.

SAM: I'm folding!

(laughter)

SAM: Praise be.

(laughter)

MATT: All right.

ASHLEY: Wilde out.

MATT: Everyone roll a d6 publicly now. Dealer has a three.

SAM: See what I would've gotten.

TRAVIS: A d6 publicly?

MATT: Mm-hmm.

SAM: A five, amazing.

LAURA: Mm-hmm.

MARISHA: Ooh.

ASHLEY: A five.

MATT: Okay. Three on the dealer's side.

TRAVIS: Six.

MATT: All right. So, call? Raise?

TRAVIS: I check.

ASHLEY: I raise.

SAM: Yes, you do!

TRAVIS: Fuck.

MATT: Okay, how much do you raise?

ASHLEY: (voice cracking) 25 gold.

MATT: Okay.

(laughter)

ASHLEY: To make it an even 100.

LAURA: (voice cracking) 25 gold.

SAM: Is that your tell?

MATT: You got it.

SAM: I think we saw a tell just there.

LAURA: I know.

MATT: The dealer--

TALIESIN: Total chaos.

LIAM: Straight fire.

LAURA: Uh-huh.

MATT: The dealer meets it.

LAURA: False tell.

TRAVIS: I'll raise. 100 gold.

SAM: Oh!

MARISHA: Oh!

LIAM: Oh, big daddy!

SAM: This is sexual tension! This is sexual tension!

ASHLEY: Oh shit!

LAURA: What's happening right now?

TRAVIS: It's only big dogs at this table. Arf, arf!

(laughter)

ASHLEY: Oh, are you just a puppy?

LAURA: (laughs)

ASHLEY: I'm a little wolf over here.

(laughter)

MARISHA: Nailed it.

(laughter)

ASHLEY: Wow. I...

(laughter)

ASHLEY: Would like to try--

TRAVIS: Fearne, get off the table!

(laughter)

MARISHA: Stop standing in the booths.

(laughter)

ASHLEY: I would like to try to sleight of hand.

SAM: Okay, okay.

ASHLEY: And put my eight to an eight. My die.

SAM: Oh, the first die?

ASHLEY: The first die.

LIAM: Trying to fudge the number?

MATT: Roll a sleight of hand check for me.

ASHLEY: I would like to fudge the number.

SAM: Come on, come on.

TRAVIS: At the table that the dealer's sitting at, and the pit boss is really watching.

ASHLEY: Uh-huh.

MATT: Just letting you know, this is a relatively high challenge.

LIAM: This faun is down to fuck.

TALIESIN: Well, this is the end of us.

ASHLEY: It is?

SAM: She's got it. She's got it.

MATT: We're going to put the DC of this at a 22.

MARISHA: 22!

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: Because you're right there in front of a dealer that is literally watching your hand as you do this.

ASHLEY: So I would have to roll--

LIAM: We are getting fucking rolled out of here.

ASHLEY: Hold on, hold on.

LIAM: Botch this.

ASHLEY: That would be-- That's only, I would have to roll a 17 or higher. Okay, I'm going to leave it.

SAM: It's doable!

MATT: It's doable.

ASHLEY: Don't you guys taunt me like this.

LIAM: Do it, do it.

SAM: I wish I--

MARISHA: 10%?

SAM: Wish I could do Guidance but I don't know if she's doing it.

LIAM: I triple faun dare you.

ASHLEY: Okay, I'm going to do it.

MATT: Okay.

ASHLEY: Okay. It works.

MATT: What'd you get?

ASHLEY: I rolled an 18!

MATT: Okay. So do you--

TALIESIN: Monster!

TRAVIS: Wow.

MATT: Do you meet his raise or do you raise yourself?

LAURA: Oh yeah, he raised a 100.

ASHLEY: Two platinum.

MARISHA and SAM: Oh!

TALIESIN: Woo!

SAM: Thank you, Changebringer. (laughs)

MATT: So it's an extra 20 on top, so you meet his and do an extra 20?

ASHLEY: (nervously) Mm-hmm.

MATT: Okay, okay.

TALIESIN: Woof.

TRAVIS: Is the dealer matching?

MATT: The dealer matches.

MARISHA: She said two platinum?

SAM: So she said 25, he said 100. She threw down two platinum. What does that mean?

LIAM: 100 and two platinum?

SAM: Did you meet and then raise another two platinum?

ASHLEY: So 100.

LIAM: Yeah, that's what we're saying.

LAURA: 25, 100, 20. That's what we're at right now?

TRAVIS: I'll call. I'll call you. I'll see that action.

MATT: All right. So there we go. So you put another--

LIAM: ♪ I see you, baby ♪

MATT: -- 20 in there, got it.

LAURA: You don't want to put another five gold in to make it--

MARISHA: ♪ Shakin' that ass ♪

LAURA: -- an even 200 at the table?

TRAVIS: Is that what's missing?

LAURA: Five gold, five schmeasly little gold.

TRAVIS: Nah, I like these numbers.

MATT: We are 440 in the pot currently.

LIAM: Hot dog.

TALIESIN: (whistles)

MATT: All right, everyone. Roll your last die.

SAM: Just want to see what it would've been.

ASHLEY: It's a four?

MATT: d4.

TRAVIS: Oh, d4, yeah.

MATT: Dealer's at a two.

ASHLEY: Ow, ow, ow!

MARISHA: Oh damn, Chet's rolling real good. Real good.

ASHLEY: One.

MARISHA: Oh fuck!

SAM: Ooh.

ASHLEY: Oh no, still might not make it.

MATT: Okay. Now everyone reveal.

TRAVIS: All the die?

MATT: Yep.

SAM: What's the total number?

MARISHA: He rolled real fucking good.

TRAVIS: Eight, six, four.

LIAM: Dealer rolled balls.

ALL: Whoa!

LAURA: What you get, Chet? Wait, what was it?

MARISHA: The best you can do.

SAM: That's the best you can roll!

LIAM: Max? You got max?

MATT and MARISHA: He got max.

ASHLEY: Shit.

TRAVIS: Into the spider's web you played.

MATT and MARISHA: (laugh)

MATT: All right, so that puts you at 18.

LIAM: Wow!

MARISHA: I know!

ASHLEY: 16.

LIAM: That's one of the most improbable rolls in the history of this show!

MATT: Dealer's at an eight, but doubles, because they add another d4--

LAURA: (gasps)

MATT: -- which is at a two, so it's a 10, which is doubles, gets to roll another.

MARISHA: Wait, what, why does he get?

LIAM: Add a d4? Isn't that-- Oh, that's a crazy d4.

MARISHA: Wait, doubles get to roll more?

MATT: Doubles get to add d4s at the end. So there's a chance to continue to explode at the end.

SAM: Shit.

TRAVIS: I forgot about that part.

MARISHA: Oh shit.

SAM: So what did you get total?

MATT: The total will be 11, so still not.

TRAVIS: (relieved sigh)

(oohing)

MARISHA: Wow!

SAM: So Chetney wins?

LIAM: Damn, Chet.

LAURA: So that's 635 gold.

ASHLEY: Good game.

LAURA: In the pot total. Because everybody put 50 in.

MATT: Correct.

LAURA: Three people put 100. Three people put 25, and three people put 20.

MATT: Yep.

TRAVIS: Six, well, how much?

LAURA: 635 gold.

TRAVIS: 635.

MATT: Now, mind you, you get 80% of that as the winner.

TRAVIS: Oh yeah.

ASHLEY: All right, let me put some of this away.

MATT: That puts you at 508 gold back to you. And the rest goes back to the house.

TRAVIS: I tip the dealer... two gold.

SAM and MATT: (laugh)

MARISHA: Two gold!

TRAVIS: This is an expensive fucking game.

TRAVIS: I don't know why we came into the high roller section!

ASHLEY: Yes, it is.

TRAVIS: 50 gold buy-in, fuck!

LAURA: Maybe that's why the top level is a little more sparse than the bottom level.

TRAVIS: Can we get a salmon sandwich? And maybe, like, some margaritas?

MATT: "I'll see what I can do."

LAURA: What was that?

ASHLEY: That's a good idea.

MATT: The dealer goes and calls over one of the servers.

TRAVIS: Chocolate martini?

MATT: Sends out for some sandwiches and some margarita.

ASHLEY: (whispers) How much gold was it?

LAURA: That was, oh, total? You put in 100--

MARISHA: The sandwiches and margaritas.

LAURA: -- 70. 195.

SAM: Yios, huh?

ASHLEY: 195.

MARISHA: It was fun. I like it. For the 20 minutes we were here.

TRAVIS: I guess I should go get us a room, but we'll probably need the presidential suite.

MATT: "Are you talking to me?"

TRAVIS: Do you not give out the rooms, dealer?

MATT: "No, I mean, I run the games, if you--"

SAM: I can go ask.

MATT: "Talk to Freya. Freya downstairs could get you rooms."

TRAVIS: Oh shit, we want to find Freya.

SAM: I'll go ask.

TRAVIS: Okay.

SAM: You keep playing. You're on a roll!

TRAVIS: Yeah, hot hand!

LAURA: I know, that looked really fun. I really want to play it.

TRAVIS: Let's go!

ASHLEY: You want to go play? Go play!

TRAVIS: Now we know the rules. It'll be fast. Come on.

ASHLEY: Do it.

TRAVIS: Come on.

TALIESIN: Yeah, I'm going to do it.

LAURA: All right.

TALIESIN: Let's do this shit.

LIAM: The big time or the other game?

MATT: Everyone's getting into this.

TRAVIS: Yeah, we could find the Harrah's instead of the 50 gold buy-in.

TALIESIN: I'm fine either way.

LIAM: Matt, are you cool with just seven more episodes of this card game?

TALIESIN: One more, one more, just one more round, we'll call it one more.

ASHLEY: Sam's Town?

TALIESIN: Do we want to do the same game or a different game?

LAURA: The Griffon's Wall is just like blackjack with dice.

LIAM: That might be a lower buy-in.

TRAVIS: Caesar's Palace.

MATT: It is, it's 25.

LIAM: I'll wander down to that.

MARISHA: Which one are you going to?

LIAM: But I'm not playing this anymore, I haven't gotten a single box, and I'm usually so good at this game.

LAURA: I want to play Griffon's. Fork of the Storm, I want to play Fork of the Storm.

MATT: Okay, we'll say for the purposes of the narrative here, we'll do one round of Griffon's Wall, and then maybe one more round of Fork in the Storm, and then we'll--

SAM: ''This is our show now.

LIAM and TALIESIN: Yep.''

LAURA: Sorry, it's really fun, I want to play it!

ASHLEY: It's really fun!

TALIESIN: That'll happen.

MATT: It's our game to have fun!

LIAM: You made it fun!

ASHLEY: Uh-huh.

MATT: Hey. Glad you guys are here to watch, but we're going to play our game.

MARISHA: Okay, so Griffon's Wall, you do d10s and then what else?

LIAM: It's blackjack.

TRAVIS: Two d10s.

TALIESIN: It's blackjack.

LIAM: It's 10s.

MARISHA: You just got to get close to 20?

TRAVIS: As close to 21 as you can.

MARISHA: How do you get 21 with two d10s?

LIAM: Grab a d10.

MATT: No, you do two d10s, you roll those, and then you all take a round of bets and then you go ahead and can roll additional d10s for each round that you bet, trying to get as close to 21 without going over.

LAURA: But if you go over 21, you lose?

MARISHA: You bust.

MATT: You bust entirely.

LIAM: And then you're Forever 21.

TALIESIN: (groans)

MATT: Yes.

TRAVIS: Shame, shame, shame.

TALIESIN: No one. No one will ever--

LIAM: That's the worst joke ever made on this show, definitely.

MATT: We reached it. That's the limit.

TRAVIS: What's the buy in here, Chappy?

LIAM: 25?

MATT: 25 gold for this one.

LAURA: That's not fair.

MARISHA: You roll two d10s at the top?

LAURA: Imogen wouldn't play, but Laura really wants to gamble. So we're--

MARISHA: Come on, Imogen!

TRAVIS: Listen, you really got to take your mind off of it!

SAM: Take your mind off your mom!

LAURA: Yeah, yeah, don't worry, y'all, I'm in, I'm in!

ASHLEY: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Okay.

MARISHA: Okay, you roll both two d10s up top?

ASHLEY: You bring money to these places to give it away or lose it.

MATT: All right, so everyone mark down 25 each.

ASHLEY: Yeah, so you pay for fun.

LIAM: Once and then you're out.

MATT: So how many people are playing? One, two, three.

LAURA: I mean, I'll play, I'll play, too, why not.

TALIESIN: Yeah, I'll go in, sure.

MATT: Okay, so five folks, that's 125 gold in the pot currently.

LAURA: Okay, so it's 25 gold to buy in?

SAM: Let's go see the go-go dancers.

MATT: So, first d10.

MARISHA: Roll publicly?

MATT: Yep, dealer is at a seven.

TRAVIS: Ooh, eleven!

MARISHA: Oh. Terrible.

SAM: Jeez.

LIAM: Total garbage.

MARISHA: Oh wait, no, it was not as bad as I thought.

LIAM: Rolled a two and a three.

MATT: So leave the d10s there, and then we're just going to add them as we go.

LAURA: Are we rolling out here?

MATT: Yes, or wherever is publicly.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: All right, so.

LIAM: I can't read those.

LAURA: 14.

LIAM: Wow, you got a 10 and a part of an egg.

LAURA: And a four!

TRAVIS: Do we have to pay for additional d10s?

MATT: No, you just can just--

TRAVIS: We can hit?

MATT: You can hit.

TRAVIS: Oh, 10, that's 21.

(cheering)

TALIESIN: Stop it!

MATT: That is 21.

ASHLEY: This man is on fire!

LAURA: This game we're only playing against the house, we're not playing against each other.

MATT: Correct.

LIAM: You got a 10 and a 10?

TRAVIS: I've got 11 and a 10.

LIAM: Okay, all right.

LAURA: How'd you get an 11 and a 10?

TRAVIS: Six, five and 10.

MATT: It's a three-two buy out, so for every two, you can get three back if you win. All right, so what'd you get?

MARISHA: I have a 12 now.

MATT: Yep, you going to hit?

MARISHA: I'm going to hit. Oh, with a five, so that puts me at 17.

SAM: Ooh.

MARISHA: Fuck, that's the worst!

LAURA: Yeah!

SAM: You got to stay.

TRAVIS: You just got to beat the dealer. You're good.

MARISHA: That's true. I'll stay.

SAM: Why don't you spend 25 gold and pass the--

TRAVIS: Plus, you're not fucking up other people's karma in this world.

LIAM: You're at a seven?

MATT: Yeah.

LIAM: And you didn't hit, so we can--

MATT: It hasn't come back around yet.

LIAM: We can hit and roll another d10 on our turn?

MATT: Yeah.

LAURA: Yeah, okay, so I'm at 14.

MATT: You just keep going until you stop.

LAURA: Okay, I'm going to hit.

LIAM: Does the dealer also hit?

MATT: At the very end, the dealer goes.

LIAM: Oh, okay.

LAURA: Ugh! No, 21!

ASHLEY: Yes!

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: Nice!

MATT: Orym.

LIAM: Seven.

MATT: Yeah.

LIAM: That's fine. I'll try. I need a d10. Where the hell did they go?

TALIESIN: I got some d100s, if you need.

SAM: Just roll another one of Laura's.

LIAM: There it is. It was hiding. Six, all right, super low.

LAURA: So what did you roll?

LIAM: A six, so now I'm at 11 total.

LAURA: Oh, so roll, you hit again.

LIAM: Hit again?

MARISHA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Mm-hmm.

TRAVIS: Or I mean it's up to you, or the dealer could go bust.

MARISHA: Go for a 10!

LIAM: That's a 10, 21!

(cheering)

MATT: What the hell, y'all?

SAM: Bells Hells rolling in!

MATT: Apparently!

MARISHA: Hell yeah!

TALIESIN: Let me end this streak real quickly. This will be the end of it. Here we go. 15-- 21, Jesus.

(laughter)

MATT: What, yeah, nine, six and six! What the hell, y'all?!

LAURA: (yells)

MATT: This is wild!

MARISHA: What if I roll again and I roll a four? Nah, it's too risky.

TRAVIS: But what if-- you're the only one!

MARISHA: I'm the only one! Oh my god! But I got to try it. I got to try it, okay, okay. Come one, give me a four, give me a four, come on! Two, so that's 19.

SAM: Okay, okay!

MARISHA: Now I stay, now I stay.

LIAM and TRAVIS: (laugh)

MARISHA: Fuck you, dealer!

LAURA: What is it?

MATT: It's a three. It's a 10.

LAURA: Okay.

LIAM: Rollies is the best, you guys.

LAURA and MARISHA: 19!

LIAM: 19.

LAURA: And you got to hit again.

MATT: I have to hit, yeah. Yeah, that's a bust.

(cheering)

TALIESIN: That was so dumb.

LAURA: I feel like we all went to Vegas together.

MARISHA: Yeah, I know!

MATT: (laughs)

TALIESIN: That was so dumb.

TRAVIS: Stack the martinis!

(laughter)

TALIESIN: What the living--?

MARISHA: Let's all do some blow job shots!

(laughter)

MARISHA: Let's go! It's my bachelorette party.

MATT: Okay, so all of you that put money in, you get back an additional 12 gold on top of that.

LAURA: Ah.

(laughter)

LIAM: Do they have glasses shaped like troll dick here?

MATT: If you hadn't gotten rid of it, you gain 12 more gold.

TALIESIN: All right.

MATT: All right.

SAM: I'm going to ask Freya for the best suite in the house.

MATT: Okay, so you head down, outside of the casino, down into the top of the-- There are two layers to this. You look around and see, and there's a small little map on the side of the wall that shows. The spiral staircase continues down, and you can see as the tower expands, there are numerous floors. It's thinner down below because it's more of a central staircase, and all the rooms surround the outer portion of the wall as it goes. But it is all a long, cylindrical, ever-expanding inn to the bottom of this tower. Freya, you approach, and it is a female dwarf, probably looks in her thirties or so. Dark green, brown hair over a light olive skin. Interestingly, a chin beard that looks like vines that curl and entwine together.

SAM: Ooh.

MATT: And finish in a little ring with a gem in it. Overall, a very green aesthetic to the hair and skin.

LIAM: Are they actual vines, or is it hair sort of tricked out?

MATT: Hard to tell.

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: But Freya's wearing this, almost too loud, but not quite yellow dress, with really nice necklace chains around the neck, and turns to you and goes, "Oh, hello."

SAM: Smiley evening to you.

MATT: "A room you're looking for?"

SAM: Oh, yes. I'm with some high-rolling friends who are upstairs right now, and we wanted a big fancy room.

MATT: "How many are you expecting to stay?"

SAM: There are seven people with us. Well, six people and me.

MATT: "Oh, that's a lot of people. How many are staying per room?"

SAM: Well, if you have some sort of big suite, Chetney was very-- My friend, Chetney, he was very intent on getting some sort of a big suite or some sort of-- He really wants to swing a big dick while he's here, and so something ostentatious and--

(laughter)

MATT: "Let me see if it's--" She goes back and--

TALIESIN: Where did you learn that language?

MATT: -- opens this large--

SAM: From ''you, Ashton!

TALIESIN: Goddamn it.''

MATT: -- this beautifully intricate leather tome book, goes on the table, starts skimming through, and checks.

TRAVIS: Here it comes.

MATT: "We do have one room that could comfortably be considered a suite for the-- for you and your compatriots. That would be, amidst everybody, 12 gold for the night."

SAM: I think he was very intent on getting it comped because--

(laughter)

SAM: -- we just won a bunch of money, or are playing, are spending a lot of money upstairs. She just lost some, actually.

ASHLEY: Well, yes, I did.

SAM: But a lot of money is flowing, and I think he was sort of implying that because we're spending a lot, we should be treated as some sort of royalty or--

(laughter)

MATT: Make a persuasion check.

TRAVIS: I wonder how FCG's doing down there?

LAURA: Oh no.

SAM: Fast Friends.

MARISHA: Ooh!

TALIESIN: What?

TRAVIS: Wow. What is that?

TALIESIN: What?

MATT: (laughs) The intent on that. All righty.

TALIESIN: This is going to go so poorly.

MATT: Saving throw. A natural 20.

TRAVIS: Whoa!

SAM: Goddamn it!

MATT: I'm not even joking.

(groaning)

SAM: Oh no, this is bad. (laughs)

ASHLEY: That's okay. Well, if not for comping and things like that, what about for professors of the seminary?

LAURA: Oh god.

SAM: (laughs)

TALIESIN: Start looking for other hotels.

MATT: "It is 12 gold for the room for the night, and there is no flexibility. This is not a bartering or trade-based system. This is not a negotiation. This is the price of the rooms. If you wish to stay here, you pay for the room."

SAM: One moment. Chetney's going to be very upset if we don't get this room for free, so could we-- We could pay for it and then lie.

ASHLEY: And then just tell him.

SAM: Lie and say that we got it for free.

TRAVIS: You hear upstairs: 21, yeah!

LAURA: Woo!

SAM: Maybe we can even tip her so that she could lie for us and just tell him that it was--

ASHLEY: I'm down for that.

SAM: Okay.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

SAM: I don't have any money.

ASHLEY: I have money.

SAM: Okay.

ASHLEY: How much did you say the room was?

MATT: "12 gold for the night to fill the group size you are speaking about there."

ASHLEY: Okay, here you go.

SAM: Oh, she's gone.

MATT: Dropped the dice. Sorry.

LAURA: (laughs)

ASHLEY: What do I give for a tip?

SAM: Another three maybe? I don't know how money works. I don't handle money.

ASHLEY: I don't really know how to do tips. What do you give for a tip? What would I give you extra?

SAM: How much tip would you want right now?

MATT: "That is entirely up to whether or not you enjoyed the service, I assume."

ASHLEY: Well, I don't know if I enjoyed the service because you didn't comp our room.

(laughter)

TALIESIN: No!

LIAM: Shit.

SAM: Jesus.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

MATT: The attemptedly pleasant exterior of this dwarven woman begins to fade as the jaw begins to clench a bit, and the nice hand gesture of openness and presentation begins to shift into a folded arm and goes, "I apologize, but if you are not interested in getting a room for the night, we may have to ask you to leave."

ASHLEY: Oh, no, no, no, I gave you the 12 gold, and (sarcastically) for your troubles, here's another five.

SAM: Wow.

MATT: She looks down and raises an eyebrow and gives a nod. "Very well. Apology accepted."

SAM: Hey, if our friend, he's little, he has hair in his ears.

ASHLEY: Pointy, pointy feet.

SAM: He has pointy toes. If he asks, could you just tell him that the room was complementary?

MATT: Looks down at the five gold tip. "That can be arranged."

SAM: Thank you so much, Freya. You're such a good egg. Thank you.

MATT: "You're welcome."

SAM: Sorry, is there a key or--

MATT: "Yep," and she looks down, and as you were conversing, she had set the book aside, she had placed this beautiful-looking golden key. It's about that long and the handle of it, it's a bit of, almost like ivory, but it's not actual ivory, it has the look to it. And there is a number in it, number 14. "This is actually right outside of the first turn down the stairs on your left, room 14."

SAM: Thank you.

MATT: "Enjoy your stay." She immediately turns back around and goes back to look busy at other things, even though there's nobody else at the desk.

MARISHA: Tomorrow, we see a TikTok of Fearne berating the person.

(laughter)

SAM: Karen Watch 2022!

MATT: Freya's over here like, "No, it's all right. I'm trying to get your room for you."

(laughter)

ASHLEY: Oh my god.

LIAM: Faerûn watch.

MARISHA: Yeah.

(laughter)

ASHLEY: Okay, we got the room.

SAM: We did so good.

ASHLEY: We did a really good job.

SAM: Back upstairs.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MATT: All right. People said they wanted to do another round of--

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: All right.

LIAM: That was a big one.

LAURA: I want to do the Fork of the Storm.

MATT: Fork of the Storm.

LAURA: Fork of the Storm.

LIAM: Yeah, really quick.

LAURA: Okay, okay, okay, okay.

MATT: All right, it's a 50 gold buy-in for everybody.

MARISHA: 50 gold! Okay.

LAURA: Get it.

LAURA: And that one is a d8, the first one up?

TRAVIS: d8 to start.

MATT: Indeed. I will take this here.

MARISHA: We start with the d8, right?

MATT: Indeed.

TRAVIS: Are you not into it?

LIAM: I'm not playing.

MATT: Okay, all right.

LIAM: Orym already feels like a baller.

MATT: So, those who are in?

TRAVIS: Check.

MATT: Check?

MARISHA: Check.

SAM: I'm not even playing.

TALIESIN: We don't look.

MATT: You look at yours.

TALIESIN: Oh.

MATT: But you don't look at each other's.

TALIESIN: I'll raise 50.

TRAVIS: Ooh!

TALIESIN: Y'all ain't doing nothing.

MATT: All right.

TRAVIS: I fold! That was a really shitty dice.

TALIESIN: Finally.

MARISHA: I also fold.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: You going to try and read my mind? That won't go well. You know that. Sorry. I didn't say that out loud, though.

MATT: (laughs)

TALIESIN: Just reminding, reminding Laura.

LIAM: Just heavy metal.

(intense yelling noises)

TRAVIS: Pit boss is like, "You can read minds?"

LAURA: Yeah, I know, right? You said that out loud.

TALIESIN: This is just "Inception."

LAURA: (groans)

TRAVIS: Driving you out.

LAURA: Can I try to use my Telekinesis to shift my dice?

MARISHA: Oh shit!

TALIESIN: Damn.

MARISHA: Oh shit!

LAURA: I would've done that, but I would've done that as soon as it rolled. I would've tried to shift it and just give it a little nudge.

TRAVIS: Just have it do a--

LAURA: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: Bunch of cheaters.

MATT: Telekinesis, casting a spell, has verbal and sematic components.

LAURA: No, no, it doesn't, not mine. My Mage Hand is completely--

MATT: Mage Hand is different from Telekinesis.

LAURA: Right, Telekinesis is a huge spell. My Mage Hand is a telekinetic feat.

MATT: Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha. I see.

LAURA: It uses nothing. It's just brain power.

MATT: I'll tell you what.

LIAM: Is that a random reroll?

MATT: I'll tell you what. So you're just trying to nudge it into a different number roll?

LAURA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Anything different than what you've got, or a specific number?

LAURA: I'll try to nudge it and see what happens.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: It's that's bad, huh?

(laughter)

MATT: All right, go ahead and roll a d20 and add your charisma modifier. You have to beat an 18.

LAURA: I beat it.

MATT: Did you?

LAURA: I rolled an 18, so plus my charisma.

MATT: Okay, so reroll the dice, then.

LAURA: Oh no!

(laughter)

MATT: It's okay, remember, doubles can add at the end, and it can explode if need be.

LAURA: No, that's okay!

TRAVIS: Yes! (laughs)

LAURA: Then my dice is just going (clatters) around the table as I reroll it 100 times. Nope, it's still bad. Okay, it's bad. I fold.

MATT: You fold. All right, so it's between you and the dealer.

SAM: It was that bad.

LAURA: It was so bad.

MATT: Dealer meets you.

TALIESIN: All right.

MATT: All right. It's a four.

TALIESIN: Four. Raise another 50.

SAM: Ooh. I'm detecting thoughts on the dealer.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: "I hate this job. I can't wait to clock out. These fucking assholes."

MATT: That's a fail.

SAM: Do I get anything, or is he so professional?

MATT: Not even professional, the dealer's just like, "All right, bets are in."

SAM: Goddamn it.

MATT: "Putting the dice down."

SAM: Not just repeating the number in his head?

MATT: No, they have no stake in the game. They do this all day.

SAM: Goddamn it!

MATT: They didn't come here to gamble. This is literally their job.

TRAVIS: 100%.

LIAM: I really want a coffee, coffee and a muffin.

MATT: But you do start getting glimpses of, you know, childhood, their father taking them to a little carnival.

TRAVIS: The lake?

MATT: Went fishing at the carnival. Then their mom made them cry, but then apologized. You're getting all these, you're like, I went too deep, I went too deep!

(laughs)

TALIESIN: It's like that scene in "Flash Gordon."

MATT: d4, it's a four.

SAM: Oh, but he got doubles.

MATT: Okay. That's going to be a-- The dealer's going to go ahead and raise another 50.

TALIESIN: All right, I'll meet.

(groaning)

MATT: Okay.

SAM: This is dirty.

MATT: And reveal.

SAM: This is dirty. You get to roll again, Matt.

MATT: I do, but after we reveal.

SAM: Oh, I see.

TRAVIS: Oh, he got an eight.

TALIESIN: Shit.

LIAM: He got an eight, too.

MATT: Four, four, doubles, and another four.

MARISHA and SAM: Whoa!

MATT: It explodes again.

LAURA: Oh no.

MATT: So that's plus 20.

TALIESIN: Holy shit.

MATT: Another four.

(oohing)

MATT: 25 total.

SAM: Oh god!

TALIESIN: I'm out 200.

LAURA and SAM: (groan)

SAM: That was brutal!

MATT: Better luck next time. Dealer takes it in.

MARISHA: Yay!

LAURA: That was a fun game.

TALIESIN: You're right, that is fun. Shit.

LAURA: That is so fun. I would be doomed if this was for real.

TALIESIN: I know. That was really fun, actually, I feel bad.

LIAM: That was 200 gold.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

LIAM: You gave him 200 gold.

TALIESIN: Well, they won 200 gold. I didn't give them 200 gold.

(laughter)

SAM: Don't worry, though... The room is free!

MARISHA: (laughs)

TRAVIS: Oh, FCG, for real?

ASHLEY: Free, free, free, free.

TRAVIS: On all of that space?

SAM: Gratis, my friends.

TRAVIS: Insight check.

LAURA: Insight check.

ASHLEY: Because you spent so much money.

MATT: Make a deception check.

TRAVIS: I mean, that's actually quite bizarre. It's usually after you lose a lot of money. We've just been taking them to the cleaners, so that's incredible--

SAM: Eight.

TRAVIS: -- you got the room for free.

LAURA: We know you're lying.

MATT: Okay, you know they're lying. It's up to you what to do with that information.

LAURA: Wow, that's great.

TALIESIN: That's amazing.

TRAVIS: That meat tongue turned into a silver tongue.

SAM: Take your key. (tongue extending)

(laughter)

MATT: It's right around this time that you see one gentleman who was at one of the tables, and you've noticed one of the folks keeping an eye on you in the corner of one of the rooms, saunters up to your group and goes, "Well, I have seen a majestic display of all sorts of gambling insights, and I don't know, a radical energy of joyful friendship you don't see too often in these spaces." As he approaches, you see he's a man, uniya, looks like elf-orc lineage. Handsome, rakish, with long, curly auburn hair that drifts past the shoulders. Almost looks like a "Newsies" cap, but it's a little bit wider and--

LIAM: Wider than a "Newsies" cap?

MATT: Yeah.

LIAM: Wow.

MATT: It drifts over the back of the head a bit. A frill-trimmed long vest and a tusked smile that grins beneath the smile. Clean shaven beyond just the curly hair. "My apologies to intrude here, but am I wrong to assume that you are from out of town, yes?"

TRAVIS: Yes, we are.

MATT: "Well, what a wonderful coincidence. I'm from here. Are you after any sort of business? Anything in particular you're doing? Anything you're looking for? Any experiences? Any joyfulness, any connections to make?"

LAURA: Insight check.

MARISHA: Are you a tour guide?

MATT: "I am a host, meaning I can guide you around the town, I can help introduce you to many of the wonderful sights, I can show you about the circumstances, make business introductions if they are necessary. I am at your disposal for, you know, a small bit of change."

LIAM: Insight check. That's cocked.

TRAVIS: A modest fee, I'm sure.

LIAM: Balls.

TALIESIN: Is anybody--

LAURA: 20.

TALIESIN: Thank you.

MATT: 20?

(oohing)

SAM: Guys, this is not supposed to be read right now.

(laughter)

SAM: It's only for battle. It's a battle thing. This isn't battle, this is a whisper, so I'm just going to say that I love you guys.

MARISHA: Aw, we love you, too.

SAM: I'll read this one instead.

MARISHA: We've never been to Vegas together.

SAM: Balls, ass, and titties!

(laughter)

MARISHA: We've never done a Vegas trip.

LIAM: Some of us have been to Vegas together, but not this group.

MARISHA: I feel like Laura would be a bad influence.

MATT: I hate Vegas.

TRAVIS: You can't go to Vegas with Laura. She tells me to leave.

MATT: Not a fan.

MARISHA: Really?

LAURA: Every time you come to the table when we're at Vegas, I start losing.

TRAVIS: Okay--

LAURA: If you leave--

ASHLEY: Are you a cooler?

LAURA: -- I win.

MARISHA: You're a cooler.

LAURA: As soon as he stands over my shoulder, the table goes to shit.

TRAVIS: I'm clearly a cooler.

(laughter)

TRAVIS: Some people just suck at dice.

LAURA: Just for me, just for me. He's great at poker.

SAM: What's your name, friend?

TALIESIN: Thank you.

MATT: "Oh!"

(laughter)

MATT: "I am Mr. Landon Kreshawl, guiding hand to Yios."

LAURA: Landon--

LIAM: Preshalle?

MATT: "Kreshawl."

LIAM: Kreshawl.

MARISHA and LAURA: Kre.

LIAM: Kreshawl.

TRAVIS: That's an amazing name. Do you have a card?

MATT: "Oh, I am the card. (laughs) This is my card."

TRAVIS: Ah, incredible. Oh, shit, handshake.

SAM: You just stay here at the skyport and offer your services to incoming tourists?

MATT: "Well, you know, occasionally throw a little coin onto a table, but also looking for individuals who might be needing help, and you know, at certain hours of the night. I'm not the only guiding hand, but sometimes, I'm the lucky one to get to them first. So, happy to make your acquaintance. You are--?"

SAM: Bells Hells.

MATT: "Bells Hells? That's your name?"

SAM: It's our collective name. We each have individual names, but that would take too long.

MATT: "You are a collective? What is your business? What do you do as a collective?"

MARISHA: We're a traveling performance troupe.

LAURA: Detect Thoughts.

SAM: Oh boy.

MATT: Make a deception check.

MARISHA: Fuck.

TRAVIS: This'll go well. Oh, it's not bad.

MARISHA: It's all right, it's all right, it's all right. Natural 20.

TRAVIS: Let's go!

ASHLEY: Oh, let's go!

TRAVIS: Let's go!

MARISHA: Table's hot! Table's hot! (laughter)

(laughter)

MATT: "This motley presentation says traveling performance troupe, obviously. That is incredible. Please tell me, what form of performance do you do?"

LIAM: Orym starts doing Cirque du Soleil shit with his sword.

MARISHA: Mm-hmm.

MATT: "Say no more, this is wonderful. The people will be fascinated to see what you have to bring."

MARISHA: I tend to do puppetry. I take out Pâté.

MATT: (Pâté) "Hello! I'm a puppet, can't you see me?" He's like, "I didn't even see your mouth move on that."

MARISHA: (slightly slurred) My ventriloquism. It's--

MATT: "It's incredible."

LAURA: We've had a lot of drinks.

TRAVIS: Chocolate martini. Chocolate martini!

MARISHA: We're having a good night.

TRAVIS: Salmon sandwich chaser!

(laughter)

SAM: Why a salmon sandwich?

LIAM: As soon as Laudna slurs her speech, Orym shoots a vine up at the ceiling and starts to do silk work, spinning around.

LAURA: Oh god, right here in the casino, huh?

LIAM: Yep, mm-hmm, absolutely.

MATT: The nearby tables stop for a second, looking over, and some folks are hand over the back of the chair, like, "Oh man. Look at this bullshit. This is crazy. When did they start doing performances in the casino? That's amazing."

LIAM: Yep. Wrapped around his leg, he's hanging, not using his hands.

MATT: You can see some of the sentries are trying to gauge whether or not this is some- thing to get involved with. But they're just watching, because there's no aggression coming from it.

LIAM: I smile upside-down at them.

ASHLEY: I pull out my recorder.

MATT: (laughs)

ASHLEY: Hot Cross Buns.

MATT: It's a classic, Exandria over.

ASHLEY: It's a classic for a reason.

SAM: This night is crazy.

(laughter)

MATT: You've been in town for maybe a half an hour.

(laughter)

MATT: Maybe.

TALIESIN: Clearly, we were a little wound up.

MARISHA: Yes.

MATT: Imogen, you were casting Detect Thoughts.

LAURA: I was casting Detect Thoughts on Landon.

MARISHA: Because she's our mind freak!

(laughter)

TALIESIN: Really? Really?

MARISHA: She's an illusionist.

LIAM: Please leave the table.

MARISHA: Wow, Laudna.

MARISHA: I mean, it's not inaccurate.

MATT: This is the second Criss Angel reference we've made in CR content in the past month, and I'm uncomfortable with it.

(laughter)

MATT: Criss, if you're a Critter, I'm sorry. You're fine.

SAM: He's totally a Critter.

(laughter)

MARISHA: As he cries somewhere.

LAURA: Weren't you doing French lessons?

MATT: Imogen.

LAURA: In school?

SAM: Imogen! Imogen!

LIAM: Imogen.

MATT: The surface thoughts you gather are those of extreme curiosity and awe. This Landon figure is certainly taken aback and intrigued. The thoughts are like, "I would never have expected such a colorful night. What colorful possibilities. This is exciting. I'm glad I got them first." That sort of a vibe.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: You just stay there, or do you delve deeper?

LAURA: How long have you been a guide for the city, Landon?

MATT: "Oh, I've been a guide about five or so years, ever since I finished college."

LAURA: What made you decide to pursue this as a career?

MATT: "I just wanted to meet new people all the time." As you're still detecting the surface thoughts, when he says, "I finished college," he's like, "finished" college. "All sorts of interesting people from all over the world with their own stories and life experiences, it's just something that intrigues me, and who knows, maybe one day I find someone who's in a business that intrigues me more than this and I maybe make friends and follow them." The surface thoughts you get are, some people are suckers, some others are not, and some are worth more as friends.

LAURA: All right.

MARISHA: Hm.

TALIESIN: Hm.

MARISHA: Hm.

ASHLEY: What did you go to college for? Tour guiding?

MATT: "No, that's more of just personal experience, growing up here in the city. I went to college for construction, carpentry, the building of detailed furniture."

LAURA: (laughs)

ASHLEY: What material do you most like to use?

LAURA: I switch my Detect Thoughts over to Chetney.

(laughter)

MATT: You don't need to. All you hear is (thumps) under the table.

(laughter)

TALIESIN: Wow.

TRAVIS: It's more like--

(flicks table)

ASHLEY: Tink! (laughter)

(laughter)

TRAVIS: Tink.

LAURA: It's just his little feet swinging.

(laughter)

ASHLEY: ♪ Dee dee dee dee dee dee dee ♪

TALIESIN: Mm.

MATT: You still have Detect Thoughts up. The carpentry, kind of, he's searching for terms. Not sure how honest he's being.

TRAVIS: As it turns out, we are in need of well guided, well skilled hands to navigate our way through this new town.

TALIESIN: Oh boy.

MARISHA: (laughs)

TRAVIS: Yios now hosts Bells Hells, and it is the better for it. You can find us in the presidential suite.

SAM: Yeah.

MATT: "What is a president--?"

TRAVIS: It's where we're staying. We got comped because we were crushing it up here.

MATT: "Oh, congratulations."

TRAVIS: Thank you.

MATT: "Normally it works the other way around."

TRAVIS: Are you staying near here? We don't need anything this evening.

MATT: "Oh, no no no. I-- I stay in the vicinity. This is true, yes?"

SAM: Tomorrow we're probably going to head down to the Dominion Ring. Right? Is that where the--

TRAVIS: Mm-hmm.

ASHLEY: Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SAM: So maybe around breakfast, if you're around. What? No? We're not doing that?

LAURA: No, it's fine.

SAM: Maybe if you're around here around breakfast time, we could check in with you and see if you want to accompany us.

MATT: "Certainly. I can meet you here first thing in the morning and show you around at your discretion."

LAURA: What kind of rates do you charge, Landon?

MATT: "Well, for a half day of guidance, it is a five gold fee. For an entire day, we'll put it at an eight, and if you want me to show you around for the better part of a week or put me on retainer even, I am at your disposal for whatever you need, and my skillset expands from there. I am quite a multi-skilled individual."

TRAVIS: Hm. That's pretty fair.

MATT: He winks at you.

LAURA: Hmm. Mm-hmm.

MARISHA: Huh.

TRAVIS: We should have him meet us in the morning.

SAM: Yeah, in the morning. We'll see you then.

MATT: "Of course. Well, Bells Hells, it is a pleasure. I look forward to showing you the majestic sights of this majestic city. Sleep well." He exits.

TRAVIS: That hurt? The elbow bump.

MATT: No, it's fine. I do it all the time. I don't even know how most of my bruises--

TRAVIS: We should pad the edge.

MARISHA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: I like Landon.

LAURA: (laughs)

SAM: Listen, I know he seems like he's a bit of a leech, but--

LAURA: No, he seemed quite charming.

SAM: But we really don't know anything about the city, and maybe he could at least guide us around. He seems harmless enough.

LAURA: Mm-hmm.

SAM: Doesn't seem like he's going to rob us or anything.

LAURA: He didn't seem lecherous, truly. I don't think he's actually a carpenter though, Chet.

TRAVIS: What?

LAURA: I hope you know.

TRAVIS: He's dead.

SAM: Is there a code that he violated?

TRAVIS: I mean, you don't claim to be an artisan of a skilled craft like woodworking if you're not one.

ASHLEY: What if it's what he really wanted to do?

SAM: Aspires to be.

ASHLEY: Yeah, and he didn't get to, and that's why--

TRAVIS: I'll give him a test tomorrow. If he fails--

SAM: You'll kill him.

LAURA: He's dead.

ASHLEY: He loses his hands?

TRAVIS: Maybe I need to up the penalty. I was going to say something less, but sure. He dies.

LIAM: He's probably harmless.

TRAVIS: Probably.

LIAM: Probably.

TRAVIS: This was a great night. You know what would make it better? A shrimp cocktail tower.

TALIESIN: Wow.

TRAVIS: Get us one delivered to the room.

MARISHA: Yes, I saw on the menu--

SAM: All right.

MARISHA: -- that they do them in tiers to represent the city.

TRAVIS: Yep.

SAM: We'll go talk to Freya.

LIAM: That's the Dominion Ring.

SAM: She's our personal concierge assigned to us, and she only handles us now.

TRAVIS: Boy, you, woo. We are killing it tonight.

ASHLEY: Yes.

SAM: Yep. We'll talk to her.

MATT: It's wild how my left eye just started twitching when that came across.

LAURA: Yeah.

(laughter)

LAURA: What's our room number?

SAM: 14.

TRAVIS: Shrimp cocktail towers. We can all shit our brains out.

(laughter)

MATT: Welcome to Yios!

TRAVIS: Iodine fountain.

MATT: The City of Flowing Oh No.

TRAVIS: That's why the lake glows. It's just saturated with chlorine.

(laughter)

TALIESIN: We're going to die.

TRAVIS: Anybody that comes through the lake--

TALIESIN: This got so weird so fast.

TRAVIS: (screams)

ASHLEY and LIAM: (laugh)

MATT: You do head back to your chambers.

SAM: Yeah, we do.

MATT: They are very nice.

TRAVIS: Oh!

MATT: There are only five beds within the room, but they are very nice. You know, the equivalent of a queen size bed versus the casual cot or average moderate comfortability of the standard tavern or inn that you would pass by. There is one window that has crossbars in it and glass set into it that overlooks the eastern or southeastern shore. You can see the glowing waters in the distance as well as the torch lights along the eastern bridge that extends out towards the jungle far from here. You can see the stars peeking up through the sky, and a little bit of cloud cover that's slowly drifting across the skyline.

MARISHA: Can we see Ruidus?

MATT: From where you're sitting, no. You do see that Catha is up in the sky, because you do see the moonlight hitting some of the trees in the distance. You don't see it on the edges of the water. You only see it towards the center, where the glow isn't as strong because there isn't as much turbulent movement. But nevertheless, while Catha's out of view, you do see the presence of the white light. But the room is beautiful. The furniture is quaint and very well made, very well carved and oiled and tended to.

TRAVIS: Mm.

MATT: There is an armoire. There are a number of places to store your things. There are footlockers at the bottom of each bed to keep your individual wares safe, but the room is yours.

LAURA: This place is nice.

ASHLEY: Woo-wee!

MARISHA: Is there a little balcony?

MATT: There's not a balcony, there's just the window. But it is a wide window, you get a decent view.

MARISHA: All right.

TRAVIS: Tile floors or carpet?

SAM: Jesus.

MATT: The floors here are stone, but they do have rugs across them that match the decor.

TRAVIS: Watch out for those.

TALIESIN: That's a nice view. That is a very nice view.

LIAM: So, we're getting some shrimp delivered?

TALIESIN: Why?

MARISHA: I also had a charcuterie board.

TALIESIN: By yourself?

LAURA: No, delivered. To be delivered.

TALIESIN: Oh, I thought you had eaten it already. I was going to be very upset, because I'm not having shrimp.

MARISHA: No.

ASHLEY: Why aren't you going to have shrimp?

TALIESIN: I don't like it. Shrimp doesn't agree with me.

ASHLEY: Oh, doesn't agree with your tum tum?

TALIESIN: No, it gets very weird. You do not want to see what happens when I've got issues.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

LIAM: City of Flowing Shite?

TALIESIN: It's gravel.

TRAVIS: Gravel pit.

LAURA: Gravel!

(laughter)

TRAVIS: Sandblast.

LAURA: Yowza.

TRAVIS: (sandblasting)

LIAM: Like a shotgun. Pah!

(laughter)

LIAM: What are we doing?

ASHLEY: What is happening?

LIAM: What are we doing?

TALIESIN: Stop. Stop!

MARISHA: What a weird night. This is a weird game.

TALIESIN: Why do you do this to me?

LIAM: It's the most beautiful location. We've been building to coming here, and we could only make the most foul puns and gamble wantonly.

TRAVIS: We're just in the skyport! We're in the skyport!

MATT: You have not even touched the fucking city yet!

(laughter)

TALIESIN: Hopefully, we'll have our chance.

TRAVIS: We're at the casino on the way to Vegas.

MATT: You guys! You guys!

MARISHA: The first one across the border.

LAURA: You can't give us a casino!

MATT: You're still in the terminal! You haven't left the airport!

TRAVIS: Yeah.

SAM: This city is great!

(laughter)

ASHLEY: What fun.

TALIESIN: Thank you for the charcuterie.

TRAVIS: We are assholes.

MARISHA: Maybe we can get a timeshare.

SAM: It's got a Hudson News here.

LAURA: Does the window open?

(laughter)

TALIESIN: Wow.

TRAVIS: Hudson News?

(laughter)

LIAM: It's been a long week on Earth One. We just needed to unwind a little.

MATT: Yeah, that's true.

LAURA: Does the window open in our room?

MATT: It has crossbars in it and it is glass covered. It looks like it can slide open. Not slide, open from the inside out, yes.

LAURA: Yeah, can we open the windows out so we can hear the sounds of the lake?

MATT: Yeah, you can open it out there. You hear the distant rushing of water, both alongside the city itself and through the canals below. You can glance down and see there is one canal that snakes around the exterior of the tower. You can hear the water coming through, the occasional bell from the various ferry boats as they come through. You also hear the sound of seabirds that may have come up from the far south, and have just found life around here, the occasional (seabirds cawing) Through the night as they go to roost for the evening.

LIAM: How far from our window to water?

MATT: Probably about 80 or so feet.

LIAM: Cool. I want to go to there.

TALIESIN: Hey, Imogen. Imogen.

LAURA: What?

TALIESIN: If it wasn't for your deeply intense personal issues, I would never have gotten to see this, so thank you for being a bit of a mess. This is great.

LAURA: (laughs) You're welcome, Ashton.

TALIESIN: It's so good.

LAURA: Anything for you.

TALIESIN: I would hope so.

LIAM: I slide him a water.

TALIESIN: Oh yeah, good. Good.

(laughter)

LAURA: Although, technically, it's not just me that brought us here. Orym has a plethora of issues as well.

TALIESIN: Oh, that's right.

LIAM: Sure do.

TALIESIN: You don't cheers with water. That's really bad. Here's my drink. To issues. To issues.

TRAVIS: To issues!

MARISHA: Two issues of what? The Hudson News?

TALIESIN: To the Hudson fucking News.

LIAM: Incorrigible. Where's that shrimp?

MATT: Where's the shrimp?

(laughter)

TALIESIN: We are so-- Just call it a drunk-- It's a gas leak episode.

(laughter)

TRAVIS: This kind of service is intolerable. FCG, you let them know!

SAM: I'll cast Sending, and I'll send a message to Freya.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: We're being the worst!

TRAVIS: White Lotus.

SAM: Please send shrimp to our room. We will pay literally anything.

(laughter)

SAM: Just don't tell. Just don't tell that we paid for it.

(laughter)

SAM: Anything.

LIAM: Just 25 anythings.

(laughter)

ASHLEY: Wait, but make sure that it's tiered.

SAM: Oh yeah, and then three tiers, room 14.

(laughter)

LIAM: Oh my gosh.

MATT: The charcuterie plate shows up before the shrimp.

SAM: Okay.

MARISHA: Oh.

MATT: Nevertheless, a small wooden cart does eventually arrive with a haphazardly constructed, three-plate arrangement of spiral adjusted shrimp to the center under a bed of leafy greens with some sort of a cocktail sauce in a brass bowl.

ASHLEY: Oh wow.

MATT: It looks beautiful, if a little rickety. They push the cart in, and it's like, "(sighs deeply)" as they set it down and look around.

TALIESIN: I will walk over.

SAM: We should tip.

TALIESIN: I will very gently put 10 gold down.

SAM: It's free, but the tip would be appreciated.

ASHLEY: It's very nice of you.

TALIESIN: 10 gold for the tip.

ASHLEY: These look like little plump prawns. They're delish. You got good ones.

TALIESIN: Life is short.

SAM: Is that okay? Is that good? Are we good?

MATT: They shake their head and slowly emerge.

TRAVIS: You just gave them 10 gold.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

TRAVIS: For fucking shrimp.

(laughter)

TRAVIS: $3,000 for shrimp.

LIAM: Yeah. Yep.

(laughter)

TRAVIS: (laughing) We got some shitty cocktail shrimp. Them shits is purple.

LIAM: Could've bought a high end laptop, but no. We got shrimp.

(laughter)

MARISHA: The true cost of just being assholes.

(laughter)

SAM: We're land-locked right?

TALIESIN: I know who I am.

SAM: I know there's a lake, but we're not near the ocean at all, right?

LAURA: We're kind of near the ocean.

MATT: The lake eventually lets out to the ocean to the south.

SAM: Oh, okay, okay.

LAURA: So it's not the worst shrimp. They probably are pretty fresh.

MATT: I mean, there's a river. The lake goes to a river and then goes to the ocean.

SAM: Okay, okay.

MARISHA: They're crawfish.

LAURA: They're crawfish.

MATT: They're crawfish.

TALIESIN: We are not this bad when we stay in a hotel.

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah, no!

TALIESIN: This is pure fantasy.

(laughter)

SAM: Was the shrimp guy also filming us secretly? (laughter)

(laughter)

TALIESIN: Oh god, why?

LAURA: The worst.

TRAVIS: #10GoldTipper.

(laughter)

SAM: Oh god.

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: One day, these people might save the world, but tonight--

LAURA: Is not that night.

MATT: -- they're getting the shrimp squirts.

(laughter)

TRAVIS: They sure are.

SAM: Okay, okay. This is a serious RPG. Let's go, let's go.

(laughter)

LIAM: Orym's just going to town on the shrimp.

LIAM: Yeah, it's a fair amount for seven people. You can finish it at your own despair. But--

(laughter)

MATT: Is there anything else you would--

LAURA: Shrimp cocktail's so good!

ASHLEY: It's delicious.

MATT: I'm not saying it's not delicious.

TALIESIN: Pâté's not running around--

LAURA: I'm going to use my--

TALIESIN: -- anymore, right?

LAURA: -- Mage Hand to dip some in the cocktail sauce, and drift it over to me, across the room.

MARISHA: He's flying around the room, doing his own thing.

TALIESIN: Okay.

MARISHA: Why, is he bothering you?

TALIESIN: I mean, just, I was curious if Pâté was around.

MARISHA: You know, he's exploring the cabinets.

MATT: Just attached to the ceiling right now, just staring right at you, just.

TALIESIN: Hey.

LAURA: That is so fucked up.

TALIESIN: Hey, hey.

MARISHA: You can talk to him, go make friends, this is important, go on.

MATT: "Okay." (whooshes) He swoops down, and then latches onto your shoulder, and looks up towards this, he'll look at you, the skull with the eye socket just glaring in your direction with the faint little spark of life in the deep canal of it.

TALIESIN: I just wanted to say that when we took the Laudna head vacation, we saw the beginning idea of you. The baby idea. And we really care about her, and it's important to keep her safe and--

MATT: "I agree."

TALIESIN: Yeah, and I know you're going to be a lot of help there.

MATT: "Yeah, all costs, got to keep her safe. Keep her alive, keep her kicking."

TALIESIN: Yeah, and--

MATT: "If she goes, I go."

TALIESIN: Well, yeah, and--

SAM: It's true.

MARISHA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: I'll just say, just so that we're all clear, and I'm really happy that you're going to be helping.

MATT: "Aye, I'm real happy that you're happy."

TALIESIN: Well, since you appeared at a rather interesting moment in our reality: If that's you in there, Delilah, I swear to fuck that I will murder you if anything happens to her, and I'm watching.

MARISHA: Mm.

MATT: "What?"

TALIESIN: Are we clear?

MARISHA: Mm.

MATT: "Okay."

TALIESIN: All right, otherwise, we're good. Just thought, that should be there, protect her.

MATT: "Yeah, I will."

TALIESIN: I like you.

MATT: "(laughs)"

(whooshes)

MATT: Lands over to you. "What the fuck was that?"

(laughter)

TALIESIN: That was--

MATT: "Your friend's fucking crazy."

TALIESIN: -- probably quiet enough that no one actually heard.

MARISHA: Who, what?

TALIESIN: That was probably quiet enough that-- I was trying to keep that a little in the corner, so.

MATT: "He's threatening me!"

MARISHA: He's threatening you?

MATT: "Thinks I'm Delilah!"

MARISHA: No, that's how Ashton makes friends. They're very friendly. It's just how they say they care.

TALIESIN: I'm going to make you a fancy hat. It's going to look great.

MARISHA: (gasps)

MATT: "Apology accepted!"

MARISHA: Do you want a hat? You'd look so dashing in a hat!

MATT: "(giggles)" Crawls back under your hair.

MARISHA: Oh, yeah, it, oh right, yes, it's good, here.

ASHLEY: Should we use a little shrimp tail?

MARISHA: (gasps) Do you want to play dress up?

MATT: "I mean, you made me--"

MARISHA: Yes, you do!

MATT: "Oh, okay!"

MARISHA: Go at it, Fearne.

ASHLEY: Okay, here's some little shrimp tails. A little shrimp tail crown.

LIAM: Like Beetlejuice.

MARISHA: Yeah.

ASHLEY: Whoops.

MATT: "Oh, it's beautiful! I feel like the king of the sea!"

MARISHA: This is really good. Let's take some of this leftover charcuterie, and make you a meat dress.

MATT: "Mm, look, I'm ready for an awards show!"

MARISHA: Exactly, you--

MATT: "Lovely!"

MARISHA: Oh my goodness.

TRAVIS: Does the fancy room have a water closet, or a big tub, or anything like that?

MATT: As you inspect the room--

TALIESIN: Oh no.

MATT: -- on the far end of the chamber, there is what looks at first like a tapestry, but as you approach, you can see it's a curtain. It's just a very, very detailed curtain. You push past, and indeed, there is a washroom with a claw-foot tub on the inside, and what looks to be a large basin of water that can be heated underneath. Then turning a small knob on it, it will fill the tub with heated water.

TRAVIS: Can I go over and turn it on, and start heating the tub, and say: Imogen! Look, I know you're in a different place, but we should really enjoy the room, and it feels like you could use a soak.

SAM: Aw.

LAURA: Oh. Thank you so much, Chet.

TRAVIS: Yeah, I mean, look, I don't know how long we're going to be here, but tonight was fun, you should enjoy it.

LAURA: Oh.

TRAVIS: Relax, it'll be all right.

LAURA: Thank you.

TRAVIS: Yep.

LAURA: Okay, get out then.

TRAVIS: Oh, yeah, yeah, no, I wouldn't dream of it.

ASHLEY: Do you want me to--

TRAVIS: (cracks)

MATT: (laughs)

MARISHA: Pâté can scrub your back for you, if you-- All right.

LAURA: No, that's all right.

ASHLEY: (laughs)

LAURA: I'll go into the washroom.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: As soon as I shut the curtain, I'm going to leave it open just a little bit.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: I'm going to look out into the room. I'll step back a little bit, and I'll shut my eyes. And when I open them again, I won't be there.

SAM: (gasps) What does that mean?

LAURA: I'm going to cast Invisibility on myself.

SAM: Oh.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: I'm just going to step out of the room, and I'm going to jump out of the window. As I jump out, I'm going to cast Fly on myself.

MATT: Okay. And make a stealth check for me. With advantage, because you are invisible.

LAURA: 19.

MATT: 19, okay. Amongst the din and everything, everyone conversing, settling in, and the sound of, you know, water. Did you leave the water gently running into the tub? Okay. It's a bit noisy. While the rest of you come out, you, being you, catch just a small sound of something landing on the foot, on the windowsill. You go, and glance over, but there's nothing there.

LAURA: As you look over at the windowsill, you'll hear in your head: I'll be back.

LIAM: Water, water.

MATT: As you just dive off--

TRAVIS: (laughs) Oh, that's worse!

MARISHA: (laughs)

MATT: -- the tower, and see the beautiful landscape beneath, the hundreds of people that are walking through the streets, the various arcane glowing lamp lights that line elements of the walking paths, and the various buildings with long flags, and banners that hang, and blow gently with the breeze that pushes through. It's quite a breeze, actually, that continuously kicks through the city streets, adding this continuous, hollow (whooshes) like a multi-tuned a faint wood instrument that just drifts through the city at different times. As that sound reaches your ears as you plummet towards the bottom, seeing the canals, and the stonework, and then people below catching faster. (blows) Your invisibility fades as your flight kicks in, and you drift back up, in control of your plummet.

LAURA: I'm going to fly up, and go up above the city, and look down at everything. Look down at the lake, and take in the lack of sound in my head. I'm going to cast Sending, and try to contact my mother again.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: I'm in Yios. Are you here? I know you want to stay distant, but please, I need guidance. Please.

MATT: It's 45 grueling seconds of silence before your mother's voice comes back through towards you. "If you're there, then you need to stay there. Stay safe. I understand the need for answers, but it's a real dangerous journey." She casts Sending towards you.

SAM: Ooh.

MATT: "I've given up so much to keep you safe. At the end of it all, that's all I want. Please."

LAURA: Mother. This storm is coming. If you keep running from me, I'm afraid I'm going to get swept up in it. I know I'll find you in the end.

MATT: "If you keep running towards me, you'll definitely end up swept up in it. Imogen. Run."

LAURA: I don't respond. I'm just going to stay up above the city for a while before I fly back down. I'll land on the windowsill. In your head, you hear: Can you turn off that water? I'm afraid I might have overflowed the little washroom there.

LIAM: I make sure that no one's paying attention, and slides in behind the curtain. Stops it just before it overflows.

MATT: It's right on the cusp, too. The steam's rising, and just the little bit, it's just about to go over the edge.

LIAM: And just slinks out, like a sentry to a door.

LAURA: (laughs)

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: Yeah, I'll hit Invisibility on myself, and head back into the room before I come back out again.

MATT: Okay, so, you can. All righty. So, the rest of you go ahead, and unless you have any other business to attend, bed down for the night in probably the most comfortable quarters, not only you've slept in in a long time, but for some of you probably ever, most of you probably ever. In fact, for all of you, probably ever.

(laughter)

MATT: It is just garish enough to be wonderful.

LAURA: (laughs)

MATT: And pleasant dreams come for all of you. Eventually, the cold lake air of the night gives to a warmer fresh sunrise morning, into a new day, a fresh day. Really, truly your first day here in the City of Flowing Light. Having arrived in its evening glow, it's comparably disappointing to be met with just a standard flowing lake. But that doesn't diminish the beauty of this city. With this, the numerous sea and lake birds all have gathered along the rooftops and tower tops, and you see them flying in flocks, and cawing, and speaking over the air, and the sound of the rushing water at the canals. You can see the people below that are bringing renewed lively life to the city streets. Someone's likely going up show up soon to turn down your bed. So, what do you want to do? (laughs)

SAM: What do we want to do? I know we're going to the seminary. There were some other things, too, though. I wrote down, Lord Preston lives here, I don't even know who that is, but I wrote it down.

MATT: Lord Preston Drodelon.

LAURA: (gasps) Oh, the one from the dance.

MATT: Mm-hmm.

TRAVIS: Yep.

SAM: Did we meet him?

LAURA: Yeah, the one that was in love with Fearne.

TALIESIN: How many are we at now?

LAURA: Everybody.

TALIESIN: You're just dropping bodies.

TRAVIS: Lord Preston Drodelon is also the former--

ASHLEY: What can I say?

TALIESIN: Grab, rip, display.

LAURA: (laughs)

SAM: But the seminary has ancient texts that we need to investigate.

LAURA: Uh-huh?

SAM: I was also told by somebody that people here could maybe know about me, or my insides. There's also also the Grim Verity, is that also at the cemetery?

LIAM: We're specifically looking for Ebenold Kai. Roe Estani gave me a letter of introduction to meet Ebenold Kai, who is part of the Grim Verity, would know--

SAM: In the seminary?

LIAM: Yes, he would know about Balan and Zeyar Lumas, Lumas.

LAURA: Professor Kadija Sumal is the one who wrote the essay about my mother, who's also at the seminary.

SAM: Well, then we got to go there.

LIAM: That's right.

TALIESIN: Seems like a definite--

SAM: Do we want good old Landon Crushio to help us, to walk with us?

LAURA: I mean.

LIAM: Why not?

SAM: Okay.

LAURA: Sure.

SAM: All right.

TALIESIN: We are going to promise a bonus at the end of completion.

LAURA: Oh, we are?

TALIESIN: It's a better way of making sure that there's more money in getting us what we need than robbing us along the way.

TRAVIS: Get there, and then maybe we send him off on an errand. So, he can go find Lord Drodelon.

TALIESIN: As someone who's seen this grift.

LIAM: Orym finishes a massive set of pull-ups from a vine clinging into the ceiling, and then heads off to the bathroom to unleash the shrimp shitstorm.

(laughter)

LAURA: Clear out, clear out, clear out.

TRAVIS: Let the lava flow.

SAM: Oh god.

LAURA: I got enough of those thoughts from Orym. We should not be be in this room.

LIAM: All I eat is protein, guys, get used to it.

MATT: (laughs) All right.

SAM: To the seminary!

MATT: With the day in full effect, you head down the long spiraling staircase past the many chambers, and side rooms that contain, or side platforms that contain desks, and sitting lounging space as you continue down the ever widening tower of the skyport lounge, until eventually you come to the bottom floor, in which there was a second desk, as well as a small bar. There sitting in a chair that immediately he sits up, and puts the hat back on, is Mr. Landon Kreshawl, and he's like, "Good morning, friends, Bells Hells. Happy to see you up. I assume we are still good for our arrangement today?"

TRAVIS: Yes!

MARISHA: Spare cells?

SAM: I don't know!

MARISHA: (hums uncertainly) Spare cells, yes.

SAM: Did he just say "spare cells" to us?

MARISHA: That's what I heard.

MATT: "Bells Hells."

SAM: Oh! Bells Hells.

MARISHA: I thought it was a greeting!

SAM: I thought so, too!

TRAVIS: We had the shrimp tower last night, so, auditory response is a little delayed this morning.

MATT: "Oh, you had the shrimp, mm, yeah. First order of business as your guide, maybe try to avoid the shrimp. It's not really shrimp, too."

LIAM: Too little, too late.

LAURA: Uh-huh.

ASHLEY: It's not really shrimp?

TALIESIN: Not too little.

ASHLEY: Did you just say?

MATT: "It's more of a lake and river crawfish."

TRAVIS: We were going to make our way into the city, and we thought that your services might be helpful.

MATT: "Well, I'm ever at your service."

SAM: To the seminary, please.

MATT: "The seminary first?"

SAM: Yes.

LIAM: While pointing out any landmarks or places of note on the way.

MATT: "Of course."

TALIESIN: Interesting shops of strange curios, magic, magic shops, anything similar to that would be lovely.

MATT: "There could be a few of those. Of course! Yes please, this way, this way. Come." You notice they look over and glance. The person, the clerk at the desk goes, "Landon, take your compatriots and leave, please." (Landon) "Of course. Come on." As you exit out onto the street, the scent of the watered air, the lake scents are a combination of fresh, and also slightly lake like. There is different points of the tide, beyond to the ocean area, a faint mixture of soft earth and drudged lakefront that also meets with the clarity of the wind that comes from the fresh jungles that surround the lake. But the city is at your disposal. Landon immediately says, "There are-- I mentioned the rings before. You are heading towards the Dominion Ring. There's the Venture Ring, which is where the Radiant Harbor exists. This is the central harbor of ships that travel to and from the ocean, beyond and southward to the the Lapis Channel."

LIAM: Lapis Channel. "This is the outlet that eventually gives way to the city, or sorry, the ocean beyond, the Beryl Sea is to the south. But that is not where we're traveling to. Also, it's probably the most residential and not as beautiful a comparison to where you are and where you are going. Here in the Endeavor Ring, there are all manner things. There is the Tri-Bridge Plaza which we'll go by on the way, which is maybe what you're talking about."

LAURA: The Tri?

MATT: "The Tri-Bridge Plaza."

LAURA: The Tri-Bridge.

LIAM: The Tri-Bridge.

MATT: "Come, this way," and begins to lead you along a path in which you start winding through streets. You can see now, the way the city is built. You're used to cities that have a manner of very rigid structure, at least to some degree have a grid-like pattern. This, you get the sense that whatever sort of landscape or hill that the city was built upon, that existed here in the middle of the lake, some odd topography. As opposed to bending the land to their shape, they built to match the shape of the land. In doing so, the neighborhoods have this quaint, twisting quality. A lot of the streets curve around. Everything has character to it, which is a loving variation from what you are often used to. No gondolas dragging you from spire to spire, which is also a joy.

TRAVIS and LAURA: Eyy!

TRAVIS: Keep those silvers in your pocket.

MATT: Indeed. But you do occasionally see from some of the nearby canals that go through, there are small boats that are ferried through. There's an individual who rows and keeps the rudder on the back. You get the sense from where they go, there are some that travel that are separate from the rest of the heavy water flow that carry through the city on an even bit of height. There are some that are rushing a bit and travel for fast movement down to the lower portion of the city. So there are canals for traversing across the city, and some that just move within the ring itself. But they're also very crowded. Most people here take the ferry if they're available, and they have to go across. So as you're looking past you're like, "Oh, these are cool. Oh, that's-- I see what they mean by, 'They're free, but if you can find a space for one.'" They seem to be fairly busy. But as Landon pulls you through, he explains everything about these canals, how when they were introduced. "Initially, it was just for getting trade throughout the city. But then eventually the Ferry Guild, as it rose, run by Sarah Bundin, began to build these ships. Through dealing with the Court of the Lambent Path, they were able to grant upon him the organization of and maintenance of these ferries. As such they have, transitioned away from pure trade, and now into moving individuals throughout the city. They've expanded and built more upon them. It is beautiful. Sometimes it can be equally frustrating. In times of heavy rain, it can also lead to some minor flooding. But today, the weather has been fine. It has been for some time. But follow me." Leads upward in the northern direction.

LIAM: Sorry. As always, Orym's head is on a swivel, looking for trouble.

MATT: Understood. Make a perception check for me, if you don't mind.

TALIESIN: Thank you.

LIAM: 21.

MATT: 21. Okay. Keeping an eye out. Guiding around, he pushes onto this one portion of the hill, because it does rise up, and you see while it is tiered, here in the Endeavor Ring, it seems to climb up. There's this unique switchback climbing hill spiral of the streets that climb up, and again, and wind up and around. It's this climb up the side of this hill that is the central part of this ring that eventually glides up and leads to the Dominion Ring. There are numerous staircases that wind up. You can see underneath these large staircases that climb to the upper area, there are these holes in them where the canals slip through underneath, and carry people down below. Everything has this M.C. Escher vibe to it in the way that the architecture looks like it shouldn't function, but upon taking a moment to take it in, everything is designed specifically to function exactly against each other in a way that looks almost dangerous, but seems to work okay. The people that live here, or at least are used to it, seem nonplussed by the sometimes rapid movement of these ships and what you would expect to be somewhat nerve wracking appearance of these low arches and thoroughfares that it immediately cuts around and underneath. Some of these canals do dip underneath, and briefly vanish beneath certain parts of the hills, until emerging into the lower bits. It's like a gentle ride.

SAM: Cool.

MARISHA: That is cool.

MATT: You do see people that are in these ferries are holding onto bars that are latched into the wood sides of it so they aren't being knocked over the edge in case there is a bump, because they do occasionally happen. Heading up these stairs, you can see all the beautiful colors and banners. There are these long strands of painted banners that flap in the ever present wind. You do have to... Your hair gets blown in your face a bit. There is a continuous gust that builds and then fades with time. The wind does carry through here pretty consistently. As you come upon this climb, you do see one collection of storefronts and buildings. There are carts lining the streets as you begin to walk up the different staircases to the different areas of this massive hill. You can see there are large two-, three-story buildings that are built into the back of it, that have signs hanging out front. There's smells of food and all sorts of unique construction materials that are being wheeled out to build extensions to it or are being rebuilt. You do notice that there are some buildings that look much older, and others that look very recent next to each other. As you begin to notice these details, Landon goes, "I see you are picking up on the variations. Some of these buildings were damaged during the Apex War. We've been continuously-- I say we, meaning the city. -- have been renovating and getting things back to how they once were in the wake of such. For the most part, many of these buildings you've seen have been rebuilt over the past two decades or so to, in my opinion, even more spit polished prominence."

LIAM: How old are the oldest?

MATT: "The oldest are probably about 250 years--"

LAURA: Wow.

SAM: Wow.

MATT: "-- or so. A bit longer than that maybe. Anyway." He seems a bit lost in these questions. Seems a bit embarrassed he doesn't have the specific number, being your guide. But anyway. "As you can glance up here, this is the Tri-Bridge Plaza we are climbing to." You see the reason it's called the Tri-Bridge Plaza is it's built-- This hill really sits in the center of where these two side bridges and the north bridge all point in the middle of the city. Here, you can hear all sorts of laughter and music and bartering, people chatting and talking and living in the moment of trade and trying to discuss a social means of agreement. You can see there's blues and greens and golds on these different banners as you come into the Tri-Bridge Plaza. There's a newish looking statue that clambers in the center of it. It stands about 15 feet tall. You see an orcish warrior in regal armor, flowing tassels that are affixed to the metallic sculpture, the stone and metal around it. There's a sword and shield that it holds, it's holding above the entire district there. He goes, "Ah, this is a statue of Exemplar Mani Drogidon, who is a hero of the Apex War, and is currently semiretired seneschal within the Court of the Lambent Path.

LIAM: What was that full name again? Mani--?

MATT: "Mani Drogidon."

LIAM: Drogidon.

LAURA: Dro-gi-don.

MATT: "This statue was erected as part of that Phoenix Project. I was telling you, the rebuilding and--"

TRAVIS: Beautification.

MATT: "Beautification, thank you very much, of Yios in the wake of the conflict. Much of this plaza was damaged. But, much better than it is now. This, I think would be of interest to you." Kind of glances over. "This is Trudge the Glimmer Antiques and Imports, part pawn shop, also somewhat a rickety seller of knickknacks, decor, and antiques, occasionally rare and interesting things."

TALIESIN: Love a pawn shop.

MATT: "Could be interesting. There's also, at the top here, I'll show you in a second when we get there. But there is also Traverse Rarities. This is a specialist collector of foreign goods, rare curios, depending what you're looking for. That place is a little more expensive, has been around for quite some time, and has passed through many different hands over the years, and is known to be an Exandrian-wide collector of odd things and findings."

LAURA: Wow.

MARISHA: Traverse, yeah.

LIAM: That'd be interesting to see, just see it.

TALIESIN: Oh yeah, always.

LAURA: What was the name of it?

MATT: "Traverse Rarities."

TRAVIS: And Trudge the Glimmer?

MATT: Trudge the Glimmer, yeah.

LIAM: Trudge the Glimmer.

TALIESIN: Trudge the Glimmer.

LIAM: That's a good band name.

TALIESIN: Mm-hmm.

MATT: (laughs)

TRAVIS: All right, guys. See you later. I'm gonna go trudge the glimmer.

(weak laughter)

SAM: Take some extra toilet paper.

MATT and LAURA: (laugh)

MATT: "Continuing on to the seminary?"

SAM: Oy.

MATT: "Very well."

ASHLEY: Oy.

MATT: As you climb the stairs, taller and taller as it goes--

TALIESIN: That does sound like poop or something.

MATT: You can now see the full height of the tower that you stayed in last night, and it does stand out prominently here in that district. But it is beautiful, and you can see now, especially knowing that it's yours, you can see your sky ship up there. It's a unique new perspective of this gift that you were given. Climbing up into the next section, you come to the upper platform. Indeed, you can see now the dam-like cliffs that break up the lake to each side, as you're climbing up the steps, and looking out to the distance. There are sections of carefully cultivated waterfalls that just fall down. You do see a couple of platforms. You swear you see a ship that's being carried up from a lower platform on a large stone slab, with a faint bit of sigil glows around it. It looks like some sort of arcane lift that is lifting larger boats from lower parts of the water to the upper portions of it--

LAURA: Oh wow.

MATT: -- as it slides back into the water and the boat takes to the lake and finds its way.

LIAM: So they got the water slide down, and the arcane elevator--

MATT: They get lifted up as they need to.

LIAM: -- lifts it up.

TRAVIS: That's awesome.

LAURA: Badass.

TALIESIN: That's some Pirates of the Caribbean shit right there.

MATT: Kind of, yeah, now that you put it that way. Now coming into the Dominion Ring.

SAM: That's the upper?

MATT: This is the upper northern region.

LIAM: Upper decker.

MATT: Yes, indeed. "This is certainly considered the most erudite portion of the city. It is the governance of the entire region of Aeshanadoor." At this point, you're used to the bustling mix of people in different cities. Exandria is definitely a world of, for the most part, sharing of cultures. Central cities seem to have a fair mix of the nearby cultures. This city is predominantly orc. I'd say probably a third of the people that you've come across, if not more, are pureblood orc, or half-orc, or some uniya variation, almost bordering on half of them. Looking around, a lot of the architecture, looking around, a lot of the statues of founders of the city, and previous historical figures that are being held here as important points of memorial are, for the most part, also orcish, or of orcish blood. So you see, as you step up into the Dominion Ring, already on each side of the main staircases there are these massive 10-foot tall statues of, one is a male orc, the other is female. They're both in big long almost Roman robes over one shoulder that drift past their feet, and dangle off the top of the steps, all carved from stone. The man you see, one arm is behind the back and the other one's holding this sprig of some leaf in his hand. The woman across the way is holding a sword that is facing down in front of her, with the same arm behind her back. They both overlook the lower rings of the city. Within this walkway, you can already be taken aback by the numerous towers and structures, these large domed buildings, and bursts of garden throughout the Dominion Ring. This is definitely where the affluent might live. But this is also where the larger places of study would reside. At which point, Mr. Landon Kreshawl says, "So this, on the far northern side, you see that massive palace up there. That is the Seat of Valor." You glance and look, and you can see it is built central to this long walkway, this wide thoroughfare that carves the entirety of the Dominion Ring to the far end side. There are numerous small benches and carts, and small buildings along the side. But it is, comparable to the rest of the dense sides of the ring's structures and buildings, it has left a nearly open path to this gargantuan palace of turquoise and bronze domes of different height levels.

LAURA: Wow.

MATT: You can see rising white towers and pillared walls. Even at just this distance, the glances you can see, it's beautiful, if slightly intimidating. "This is the home of the Court of the Lambent Path. This is the court that maintains, oversees, governs all of Aeshanadoor. Over there," he points to the right hand side, there is a massive rose colored and white marbled amphitheater, this large, circular amphitheater that is open to the sky. "That is the Rose Marble Amphitheater. This is where major events, contests, presentations, debates, philosophical discussions that are not specific to any of the various colleges transpire, as well as, for the very very rich, weddings and parties. I've snuck into a few of them, and to be honest, it's a bit too much space unless you invited the entire city. But anyway, onward. Going past, this is the Yios Library of the Cobalt Soul here to the left."

SAM: Mm.

MATT: "This, ah." He glances up and you can see this incredible... It's a magnificent towering structure, its architecture in sandstone-colored pillars with gilded edges. There is this... I lost my point there. Sorry, I'm trying to get the description here. (laughs) You can see here the massive campus of the Aydinlan Seminary. This cloistered section of the central building, surrounded by a network of garden walls stand about maybe three large, imposing college buildings of uniquely different types of architecture. One is a massive stronghold of halls and classrooms that itself is topped by a number of small towers that all have different heights and give this unique, almost castle aesthetic, though it all matches that same dreary, light blue-gray coloration to it. Inside the courtyard there are numerous sprawling gardens and hedges, and you can see students wandering through, having conversations, moving from class to class. You can see there, the two other large buildings have-- One has a dark maroon coloration. One has a faint lavender purple color to it. But they're all connected by a series of walkways, overlapping the skyways that move between the buildings. Throughout this courtyard, there are free-standing stone archways that are just there for decoration, walking through. There are numerous statues of different figures from the history of the seminary. You see throughout this continuous banner, that you assume would be the seminary seal. Most banners are burgundy with the symbol of a blossom growing from and entwined with an empty nautilus shell.

TRAVIS: Oh, cool.

TALIESIN: Mm-hmm.

MATT: The front building, you can see the prominent entrance, the main central structure sitting above a set of about 50 or so stairs that slowly pinch inward towards the front were two sets of large gold leaf, red-colored wooden doors remain partially open, each flanked by armored centuries of Yios. As you ascend the stairs with Landon explaining about the seminary and how long it's been here and how "It is in a unique... Let's say a strong rivalry with the Tatrielle Conservatory, which is in the Endeavor Ring, which we came from. There are three colleges as part of the city, but the Seminary is certainly the crown jewel of learning within Yios, and probably one of the finest colleges in Exandria. It is the strongest rival to the major college in Ank'Harel, as well as those abroad. In fact, many of the top scholars of these colleges often get together at certain points during the year to have competitive debates and to both express their work and their study and tear down the others with logic and whatever else bullshit that individuals do that make up their lives in these halls. I wouldn't know, I don't go there."

LAURA: Do they study magic there or is it just science and--?

MATT: "I'm certain there are magic studies there as well, but like every college, there is a wide spread of interests. But magic and the creation of internment is a very important part of both city maintenance and for the power of the seat of Yios and Aeshanadoor and the world. So I'm certainly they are very eager to maintain a ever consistent growing new class of powerful mages to lift up the national banner and make it so we don't have to pay too much to move around."

LAURA: (laughs)

MARISHA: So much information.

SAM: I know. I want to go there.

LIAM: What's the focus at the Tatrielle Conservatory?

MATT: "It is more of a, as you said, like a less expensive, more accessible college within the city. It's where I went. And it was more based on the historical philosophy aspects back when the city first was created. It was the first college here in the city, which holds a point of pride, even though the Seminary has risen more extreme permanence. But there's a wide spread of different disciplines to be learned. I will say that the majority of the city's engineers tend to come from there, but I don't know if that's because they have better engineering and mathematical programming or if it's just more affordable to people and so people tend to be more interested in doing so without saddling themselves with extreme debt. But."

SAM: He is such a good tour guide, by the way.

LAURA: He knows a lot.

SAM: I know.

MATT: "I told you I'm good at my job. I was not about to let you down, huh?"

TALIESIN: I'm actually pretty impressed.

LAURA: Just for my sake of visualization, did you say he has longish hair, like shoulder-length hair, or did you say it was short?

MATT: No, it's longish shoulder length-ish, about there.

TRAVIS: Auburn.

MATT: Yeah, like a dark auburn.

SAM: How many Mercers long is it? Is it like--

LAURA: Is it like your length?

MATT: It's about a Mercer's long, but it's wavier and a little more body.

TRAVIS: One and a half Mercers?

MATT: Yeah, there you go.

LAURA: Does he ever wear it up in a top knot or a half knot?

MATT: You've only seen him wearing the hat. Or when he took the hat off, it was just down. So no.

LAURA: Okay.

TALIESIN: That's a lot of Mercer right there, Is it 1.25?

TRAVIS: One and a half long Mercer.

MATT: My god.

TRAVIS: It's lower scapula.

TALIESIN: Mm-hmm.

MATT: "But alas, here we are. I do not think that I can show you inside the building. That would be more your own journey to make."

MATT: "But if you know how long you'll be here, if you'd like me to continue to show you around or if this is your destination, I could always--"

SAM: Do you want to tell him where we're going? The observatory, or the library, or the Omen Archive?

LAURA: A lot of times places like this-- Right. A lot of times, well at least at the Starpoint Conservatory, they don't allow you to just waltz in. You have to have a letter of recommendation.

SAM: We have a letter, don't we?

LAURA: I believe.

LIAM: Letter of introduction, yes.

SAM: Yeah, great.

LAURA: So that's wonderful. So yeah, do you happen to know where the, I don't know, would it be the admissions building?

SAM: We're not going to go here as students.

LAURA: No, but the offices.

LIAM: Administration?

LAURA: Yeah, that's what I meant.

SAM: Student loan office?

(laughter)

LAURA: Administration. I don't know. I didn't go to college, so I don't know what the fuck. But you know what I mean.

TRAVIS: You went for a semester.

MATT: He gives you this-- "I've not really been in the halls here, but I imagine at the top of those stairs who can guide you to where you are looking for, I imagine."

LAURA: Thank you.

MATT: "No worries."

SAM: You'll wait here? You're still on the clock?

MATT: "If you need me to wait here."

SAM: We got you all day?

MATT: "As long as you need. You have not paid me yet."

SAM: I don't have money on me.

TRAVIS: I do! I do. Boy.

SAM: Weighing you down a little?

TRAVIS: How much did he-- Yeah. (laughs) I just got a limp on one side--

(laughter)

TRAVIS: -- and a bulge in the right leg.

SAM: What did you say, five gold a day?

LAURA: Five gold for a half day, eight for a full day.

SAM: That's right.

MATT: "That is correct. So this would be a half day, or you can pay me eight and keep me on retainer for the full day."

TRAVIS: Do we need to send him on any errands? Does he need to go find Lord Dro-lo-lol?

LIAM: One more time, please.

TRAVIS: Lord Dro-lo-lol?

TALIESIN: I didn't quite catch that.

SAM: I don't think he goes on-- Do you go on errands?

MATT: "I'm not much of an errand page, I'm a guide."

SAM: He waits here.

TALIESIN: I think all day is probably a pretty good idea.

SAM: Yeah, that's right.

LAURA: Why not?

TALIESIN: You've been so helpful so far. I'm just going to throw the eight down. Actually, I'm just going to throw 10 gold down.

MATT: 10 gold down?

(laughter)

MATT: "Thank you very much."

TALIESIN: Well, you know.

MATT: I really appreciate it.

LAURA: Just ludicrous. Yes, oh my god.

LIAM: Since we've been walking with Landon for a few hours. Are his HP way lower than Orym's? Does he seem like a regular fellow?

MATT: Yeah, they're way lower than yours.

LIAM: Yeah, yeah.

SAM: He's a brass dragon.

LIAM: He could secretly be an assassin and then stab me in the back.

TRAVIS: 345 HP. (gasps)

MATT: Way out of your league. "Well, for that amount, I will stay here I guess amongst the garden until you need me."

TALIESIN: Perfect. And yes, I figured that's an appropriate bonus because we can be very obnoxious and difficult to wrangle.

TRAVIS: What?

TALIESIN: You heard me!

TRAVIS: Yeah, you're right.

TALIESIN: Thank you.

MATT: Okay. You all begin to ascend the stairs?

LIAM: Yeah, we'll approach those big old doors.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: Use the old direct approach.

MATT: Climbing up the stairs, midday sun coming down.

SAM: Swinging doors.

MATT: There's a sound that pierces the air.

SAM: Oh no.

MATT: (avian screeching)

MARISHA: Wait, what?

LAURA: (gasps) It's Shithead.

MATT: You all glance up and there's these gargoyle-type creatures that are built up onto the side of the front of the building, but they're perched up. In the back of the shadow, you see some sort of avian creature that begins to curve its head out of the shadow. You see this long, hooked, somewhat scar-gnarled beak, its kind of cloudy eye--

SAM: Inside. Inside. We need to go inside right now!

MATT: -- patches of missing feathers.

TRAVIS: FCG, what's wrong?

SAM: Get inside right now. You know what's wrong!

ASHLEY: Why are you scared of this--

TALIESIN: This is not real.

MATT: It immediately trains in on you.

SAM: Get inside right now.

SAM: What? Inside right now!

MATT: (avian screeching)

SAM: No! What?

MATT: And that's where we're going to end tonight's episode.

(exclaiming)

SAM: He found me!

TRAVIS: Shithead!

SAM: He found me!

ASHLEY: Oh my god.

SAM: I thought I could run.

TALIESIN: It's the only way you could end an episode this ridiculous.

TRAVIS: Is this a real part of your backstory?!

SAM: It found me.

LAURA: This is legitimately--

MARISHA: Not FCG, but Sam Riegel--

TRAVIS: Shithead.

ASHLEY: One cloudy eye!

MARISHA: -- digging into my forearm.

MATT: Shithead found you.

(laughter)

SAM: It's been tracking me for thousands of miles.

TALIESIN: You shouldn't have flown so high.

TRAVIS: This pigeon is going to fuck you up.

LIAM: Two dollars, I want my two dollars.

(laughter)

SAM: Oh shit.

TALIESIN: Yep.

SAM: What a perfect episode.

TRAVIS: We showed that casino who's boss.

SAM: What a perfect episode.

MARISHA: That was great.

LAURA: That was so much fun.

TRAVIS: That might be one of our greatest episodes ever.

MATT: That was an absolute fucking blast.

TRAVIS: Apologies to all who watch.

TALIESIN: Lake seven, I don't know.

MATT: Apologies for the chaos for those who couldn't follow, but god, we were having fun.

TALIESIN: That got wonderfully weird.

MARISHA: Not a shopping episode, but something else.

LAURA: Just a gambling episode.

MATT: Something else it was.

TRAVIS: Something else.

ASHLEY: Something else entirely.

TALIESIN: Not quite a heist.

MATT: But yeah. I believe we'll pick up from there next week, which I think will be our last episode of year, right?

(groaning)

LIAM: Oh no, no.

MATT: That'll be our holiday sendoff, but--

MARISHA: Yeah, so are we all wearing ugly sweaters? What are we doing?

LAURA: Oh yeah, we should definitely holiday.

MATT: We'll coordinate, we'll figure it out.

LAURA: Or should we all wear pajamas? Holiday pajamas.

TALIESIN: Oh, I love PJs.

MARISHA: PJs or sweaters?

MATT: We'll figure it out.

MARISHA: Travis wears a t-shirt.

MATT: Yeah, you know--

TALIESIN: A t-shirt with a Santa Claus on.

SAM: I've got giant Mr. Fantastic on.

(laughter)

MATT: No!

MARISHA: Yeah, best of.

SAM: Yeah.

MARISHA: That's great.

TALIESIN: We could attach little reindeer between them and you can pretend to be Santa Claus with the-- Yeah.

MATT: That's true.

TALIESIN: That's a reuse right there.

MATT: That's a nightmare is what that is.

TALIESIN: Yes, the worst.

MATT: But yeah, we'll call it there. Thank you so much for joining us for this absolute batshit chaos. We love you very much, and is it Thursday yet?

(cheering)

MATT: Good night.

TRAVIS: Shithead!