Transcript:Reunion & Revelation

Pre-show
MATT: Hello, everyone, and welcome to tonight's episode of Critical Role, where a bunch of us nerdy-ass voice actors sit around and play Dungeons & Dragons.

ALL: (hollering) We play Dungeons & Dragons!

MATT: Before we jump into our session tonight, we do have some announcements to get through, beginning with the first element of our sponsors tonight, which is Cash App. Sam.

SAM: Welcome back to the Finger Championship Games, brought to you by Cash App.

MARISHA: Whoo!

SAM: The easiest way to send, spend, and save money. The number one finance app in the App Store, helping you invest in stocks with as little as $1, and connect your direct deposit and get paid two days earlier. I'm the unfortunately named Vince McSam.

LAURA, MARISHA: (laugh)

SAM: Today, Liam, AKA Flick Flair, is going to fight for my honor against Marisha, AKA the Fingerblaster.

MARISHA: (deeply) Yeah.

LIAM: (smoothly) That's right. Flick Flair is every woman's dream, and every finger's nightmare. She ain't got a chance against these knucks.

MARISHA: (deeply) Oh yeah?

LAURA: I don't like it.

MARISHA: Well, this hand is like the Highlander, because there can only be one.

LIAM: Get ready for the worst manicure of your life, Blaster!

MARISHA: When I'm done with you, you won't even have fingerprints, Dick Flick!

LIAM: (smoothly) It's Flick Flair.

SAM: Okay, okay, save it for the ring. Remember, the winner will receive twice the prize money, delivered to them with the convenience of Cash App, available on the App Store or Google Play.

LIAM: (smoothly) Plus--

SAM: Oh!

LIAM: When you sign up, use code CRITROLE for $15, and $10 will go to our very own Critical Role Foundation.

MARISHA: But the best prize is going to be taking you down, McSam.

SAM: Oh!

MARISHA: (angrily) I'm going to take that 15 bucks you owe me and buy you a cheap-ass phone tombstone!

SAM: Okay, okay, okay. We'll see. Are you ready, wrestlers? Get in the ring. It'll take a while.

LAURA: Here we go.

MARISHA: (laughs)

SAM: Let's get prepared to thumble!

MARISHA, LIAM: (groaning)

SAM: Nice cuticle crush from Flick Flair.

MARISHA: (pained groan) Oh no!

SAM: With an early pin, one, two--

MARISHA, LIAM: (groan)

SAM: Oh, but Marisha breaks free. She delivers a glove ripper.

LIAM: She's on the wire.

LIAM, MARISHA: (groan)

SAM: A furious nail biter. Oh, those are finger guns. Finger guns.

MARISHA: (gun firing)

SAM: Yep, yep, yep.

MATT: How is that regulation?

SAM: Flick Flair is not looking good. That's a pin. One, two--

LIAM: (yells) Palm Pilot!

MARISHA: What the?

TRAVIS: (whooshes)

MARISHA: Oh! What? (groans)

SAM: That's a net. That's a net.

MATT: (giggles)

MARISHA: What? What? (laughter) That's illegal! Palm Pilot?

TRAVIS: Oh yeah? Why don't you call the ref?

TALIESIN: (dings) Yep, yep. Seems like fair play to me.

MARISHA: What?

TRAVIS: Yeah!

MARISHA: But that's my second nemesis, the Digital Dominator.

TALIESIN: Sorry, Marisha, first rule of finger wrestling: expect the unexpected.

TRAVIS: (blows raspberry)

TALIESIN: (nefariously laughs)

LIAM: (shouts)

MARISHA: (pained groans)

SAM: One, two, three, it's over!

LAURA: Oh no.

SAM: What a match.

MARISHA: That's it. Vince, next time, I'm going to destroy you.

SAM: Really? You and what army?

LAURA: Ooh.

MARISHA: Maybe it's time for you to meet the Gorgeous Lady Fingers!

ASHLEY, LAURA: Ooh.

SAM: Oh. (laughs) Is that pubic hair? (laughter)

MARISHA: They're au naturel, Sam. Do not body... Do not finger shame! (laughter)

LIAM: Do their fingers... Do their fingers have heads and we've just been bald this whole time?

LAURA: I don't know.

MARISHA: Don't read that much into it. I'm going to get you, Vince McSam!

SAM: We'll find out what happens next time. Stay tuned for that battle next time Cash App sponsors the show. Matt, back to you. (laughter)

MATT: (laughs) What is happening?

LAURA: I don't know.

TRAVIS: Take that left at Albuquerque. (laughter)

MATT: Thank you, Cash App.

ASHLEY: Good match, guys.

ASHLEY, LAURA: Good match.

SAM: Good match.

LAURA: Good match.

MATT: Indulging this chaos.

LAURA: Really knocked it out of the park.

MATT: This episode is also sponsored by the release of the acclaimed RPG, "Octopath Traveler: Champions of the Continent," on iOS and Android devices. Enjoy high quality HD 2D pixel graphics, engaging combat, and storytelling akin to the console experience, optimized for your mobile device. Boop, boop, boop. Choose your own adventure with three different storylines to start with. (laughter) Wealth, power, and fame. "Octopath Traveler: Champions of the Continent" is free to download and free to play on iOS and Android devices now at bit.ly/CROctopath Laura, you've got some announcements.

LAURA: I do! (laughs) Oh. You. We've got "Clue." (cheering)

MATT: What?

LAURA: I have it at my house but nobody told me tonight--

TRAVIS: We've got it right there!

LAURA: -- we were announcing it. So guess what?

LIAM: What are you talking about?

LAURA: Here it is.

TRAVIS: Beautiful.

ASHLEY, LAURA: Wow.

ALL: Whoa.

LIAM: That art is sharp.

TRAVIS: It's real.

LAURA: No, but seriously, this is such a beautiful game.

LIAM: Oh man, I have to touch it.

TRAVIS: Stop holding it.

LAURA: Yeah. It's right in front of my face.

SAM: Is it hovering?

LAURA: No, it's sitting on the table so you can still see me. Featuring box art by Jolyne García. (cheering) (applauding) It's available now from our U.S. shop, or from your friendly local game store. It's available now?

SAM: I'm so excited.

ASHLEY: Oh my god, what a--

LAURA: Oh my god!

SAM: We have to play! Together.

MARISHA: No, we do, we could have a game night.

LAURA: Can we do that?

TALIESIN: I haven't played "Clue" in ages.

MATT: I can--

LAURA: Stay tuned for its arrival in our Canada shop. It's coming soon, you guys. I got other stuff to talk about.

SAM: Yes!

LIAM: Moving on.

LAURA: First of all... But seriously.

SAM: Come on.

LAURA: Okay, I'm going to move it so that you can still--

LIAM: Yeah, I don't want to spill coffee on it.

MATT: Take it out.

SAM: Uh-oh. You put it down on a cat who screamed. (laughter)

LAURA: First up. A Bells Hells t-shirt! (cheering)

TRAVIS: Put it on my body!

LAURA: It's designed by Bryan Weiss, who also did our Vox Machina and our Mighty Nein shirts. Check it out.

SAM: Three for three.

LAURA: ♪ Da, da, da, da ♪

ASHLEY: Look at the moons.

LAURA: Next up... Yeah, there's details. Go check it out on the store. Second up, is this Orym t-shirt! (oohing) By Savanna Mayer.

LIAM: Beautiful.

MATT: That's awesome.

LAURA: It's so beautiful. It's subtle. You've got the sword and the shield with all these beautiful plants, and a little big moon, little moon action happening.

LIAM: It was made with love.

MATT: Aw, I love that.

LAURA: Did I say it was by Savanna Mayer? Because it is. (laughter) Also, we have these ankle socks. (oohing)

SAM: I only wear ankle socks.

LAURA: By Grace Berríos. They're so cute, and they're so comfy, and they're so fun. You can wear them while you're working out--

ASHLEY: ♪ Socks, socks, socks, socks, socks, socks ♪

LAURA: While you're lounging around your house.

SAM: ♪ Socks, socks, socks ♪

LAURA: While you're working.

LIAM: ♪ Socks, socks, socks, socks ♪

TRAVIS: ♪ Everybody ♪

LIAM: Sure.

MATT: Hell yeah.

LAURA: The end. (laughter)

MATT: Thank you, Laura. (cheering)

TRAVIS: Every time.

MARISHA: It's a pretty solid--

LIAM: ♪ The socks, and everybody rocks ♪

MARISHA: (laughs)

MATT: I can't believe--

LAURA: It's part of our... Is it? Oh, shit. Sorry.

SAM: Oh, there's more? But you said "The end"?

LAURA: No, I did say "The end." It's part of our Exandria collection. Go check it out, okay, bye.

MATT: There you go.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

MATT: I'm still processing that we have "Clue," as kid who owned so many versions of it.

ASHLEY: I played "Clue" so much.

LAURA: No, but seriously, I think we should have a fun game night.

LIAM: Yeah.

ASHLEY: We should.

MATT: I'd be down for that. It's so pretty, y'all.

ASHLEY: Wait, how many players can you have?

SAM: Oh, Jesus.

LAURA: We can have all--

ASHLEY: I'm really sorry.

LAURA: No, we can have all of us.

ASHLEY: Yeah, but then what about Matt?

TRAVIS: Fuck that guy. (laughter) (laughter)

MATT: That's how you start a session. (laughter)

TRAVIS: I'll see y'all later. (laughter)

ASHLEY: Oh god. All right, we'll figure it out. (breathing heavily) (laughter)

LAURA: Oh no.

MATT: Okay, I think we're good. So, that being the case, I believe that concludes our announcements. Let's go ahead and jump into tonight's episode of Critical Role.

Part I
MATT: And welcome back.

MARISHA: Very thematic.

MATT: Last we left off: Bells Hells trekked to the city of Bassuras in the Hellcatch Valley in search of Armand Treshi, who had escaped Jrusar as a fugitive. You were sent by Lord Eshteross to go retrieve him to bring him to justice. While there, you made a friend named Dusk who had a weird tangential history to Fearne's family. Along with you they traveled, and you met Birdie Calloway. Upon which, realizing that this individual, Dusk, was not who they seem, and was actually an Unseelie assassin, sent to wipe out the Calloway bloodline and retrieve something that your parents had stolen from the Unseelie. After some tense conversation and some uncertainty of who to trust, you made a deal with the individual known as Yu, who was the actual individual behind Dusk, that in 30 or so days they would return, in which the crown that would no longer be necessary for what seems to be the coming Apogee Solstice could be returned to the Unseelie, and you would be left unharmed. Now, after this--

ASHLEY: They're coming.

LAURA: (eerily) They're coming.

MATT: -- arrangement had been made and they were let to leave, some quick catching up was had between you and your mother while the rest of you took the rest of the day to gather your things and prepare for the following day's journey, in which Birdie Calloway was going to lead you to the hideout where she and Fearne's father currently reside and are building something with their seemingly long-term ally, Ira Wendagoth, with their seemingly long-term ally, Ira Wendagoth, the Nightmare King.

ASHLEY: No.

SAM: Ira.

TRAVIS: Boy howdy.

MATT: So, you gathered your single, now repaired, skirmish-crawler. After briefly leaving and forgetting and then returning for-- (laughs)

SAM: Oh, that's right.

MATT: Your delightful new friend and ally, Hondir. You made your way out of the city to the east, tearing across the open badlands that is the Hellcatch, following her and her crawler towards this location. So, we pick up as you begin. (whooshes) Just careening over this tattered, dry land before you, dust and rock being thrown up behind you. The clattering sound of large metal legs behind your crawler, (fast thumping) running at an incredible speed. The faint dull purple glow of its underneath arcane engine, dotting the landscape beneath you with this bright blue light. Now, we had an arrangement of a few of you gathered, but for now, we'll continue to push forward. As you follow past outside of the city to the east, you recall that part of the race that you recently were part of, the Deathwish Run, dove into a ravine. About 30 or 40 minutes out of the city, the edge of that ravine begins to come around. You recall when you were arriving towards the city of Bassuras that it was sitting at the top of a wide mesa, in which a majority of the ravine itself carved around. From a distance, it looks like you're quickly coming upon a cliff edge. But, as you--

LAURA: Can we turn? (laughter)

LIAM: Birdie seems to know where she's going?

ASHLEY: Pedal to the metal.

MATT: Birdie's still careening.

LIAM: Okay.

SAM: Straight forward?

MATT: Yeah, straight towards the cliff.

SAM, LAURA: Uh.

ASHLEY: What are we doing?

TRAVIS: (laughs)

MATT: "Oh, don't worry, there's bridges around here."

ASHLEY: But I don't see one where you're going at a very fast speed.

MATT: She looks over her shoulder, taking her eyes off the road for a second, goggles still on her face. "Do you trust me?"

ASHLEY: I don't know. (laughter)

MATT: "Good".

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: (revving) And just picks up the pace, legs down, (metal banging) digging in even harder as those of you are falling behind, more dirt and clods being thrown up.

LAURA: I grab onto the--

MATT: You can see the rough elements of scattered brush and dry plant life that calls the area home are being knocked and pulled out of the ground, roots flying, as the crawler itself begins to push harder and harder forward. As you come towards the edge where you can see a lot of the cliffside brush setting up and decorating the edge, you can see large rocky pillars, and the beginning of an intense wide caravan bridge that is only visible right as you get to the edge of the cliff.

LAURA: Jeez.

MATT: Glancing down, you can see it's about 20 feet wide and has long slats of thick, hard, sun-dried and sun-bleached wood that has been reinforced with elements of iron and chain. As soon as you hit it, there's a heavy clattering sound, and you watch as the impact causes the bridge ahead to ripple with the sudden addition of your two-part caravan onto the space. It droops down over the ravine like a long-drawn cloth as you begin to (revving) head downward at an odd angle towards this bridge, which you can see seems to almost infinitely curl up into the opposite side of the ravine where it seems to attach on the opposite end.

LAURA: I throw up in my mouth a little bit.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: Yeah those ripples, they come back, too.

ASHLEY: I start doing a little-- (laughter)

LAURA: I'm glad I'm on another cart. We're dragging behind Ashton's, right?

MATT: Correct, yeah.

LAURA: They're on-- Okay.

MATT: Laudna and you are on Ashton's.

LIAM: In a wagon of some sort.

LAURA: In a busted up wagon.

MATT: Behind you, holding, is the little goblin, onto you, just clutching one of the pieces of metal with his eyes closed, going (whimpers).

LAURA: (laughs)

MATT: But as you continue downward, Birdie goes, "Hey, Fearne. Look over the edge," and pulls up to the side of the bridge, maybe getting about two feet from the endpoint. There is a bit of a guardrail, but you can see there's a bunch of scrape marks. You can see parts of it are busted inward where some people, you can see, just careened off the edge for some reason in the past and it never got repaired. But as you look over, it is a multi-hundred foot drop into this beautiful tight gorge that, down below in the space, you can see there's a tiny little river winding through that you didn't notice in the middle of the dust storm on this side of the ravine while you were going-- Actually, you didn't notice at all because you weren't part of the race. That part of the race, at least. But looking down, you can see a lot of the monsoon rains, for as long as they last, tend to drain down into these ravines, and there's speckles of green and little elements of growth beyond the scrub brush that encompasses the majority of the valley. It's like beautiful little dots of oasis that go through and behind. You can see hundreds of various desert birds that are perched up, and layers and layers of heavy nests that are dotting the rising wall of the far side of the ravine, the cliffsides and such. Then down below, you can see dust being caught up by other creatures that are running in a pack through the base of the ravine. It's this beautiful little snapshot of nature, unexpected amongst the rough and tumble experiences you've had so far in the Hellcatch. But as you glance over, Birdie looks over her shoulder again at you and says, "See, there's beauty to be found in the most unlikely of places."

ASHLEY: I can see that. This is lovely.

MATT: She's looking at you and smiling over her shoulder as the opposite side of the bridge begins to (whooshes) come back from the impact.

TRAVIS: Oh no!

MATT: Then (banging)--

TRAVIS: Brace!

MATT: It hits and you both (groans) leave the bridge for a second. She quickly like, "Oh, shit!" Turns around and grabs it.

TRAVIS: Do the legs automatically do a ski jump pose when they hit air?

MATT: Yeah, they do. They fall like, ooh. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Heel grab.

MATT: They gleam the fuck out of that cube.

LIAM: I was about to say, Orym riding FCG kicks his wheel up to the side. (laughter)

MARISHA: Laudna goes: Ow, my tailbone. (groans)

LAURA: (screams)

MATT: Hondir goes for some [inaudible] air points. (laughter) (crash) Impacting, and the bridge shakes back and forth a bit. The wind is not terribly strong at the moment, but it is, you know, the bridge does shift naturally on its own and creak a bit, but now with this heavy movement through here, it's starting to clatter and shift a little bit from the impact. At certain points, you start to really get a sense of hoping that it's pretty sturdy. You do see one on the opposite side, another singular skirmish-crawler is now careening down on the opposite side and heading in your direction.

SAM: Oh.

ASHLEY: Oh.

LIAM: One shared lane?

MATT: It's about 20 feet, so you can--

ASHLEY: Get by.

MATT: -- pass.

LIAM: Cool. High speed.

ASHLEY: Okay.

TRAVIS: Are we destroying this one?

MARISHA: Oh.

TALIESIN: I'm going to keep steering into the corner of wherever they're coming from just to make it awkward.

MATT: You're just going to challenge him the whole way?

TALIESIN: I dig it.

MARISHA: Playing chicken, yeah.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: Not for long.

MATT: Birdie pulls off to the right side to leave space. As they move over to makeshift, they see you there, and they start trying to find, maybe to try to squeeze in between the two.

TALIESIN: Yeah, okay. Yeah, yeah.

MATT: Okay. Okay.

TALIESIN: I pull up.

MATT: They immediately, as they arrive to where your space is, the opposite direction as you guys are traveling at as high of a speed as you can go based on the number of people on each of your crawlers. It's not maximum speed, but they are tearing ass. Within a second, they're right past you, the legs tearing past.

SAM: Did we get any details?

LAURA: Did we see what they look like? Yeah.

MATT: Make a perception check.

TALIESIN: I'm in on this.

ASHLEY: Yes.

MATT: A group perception check.

ASHLEY: Me, too. Me, too.

MARISHA: Group perception check?

SAM: Group perception.

MATT: Sure, why not?

TRAVIS: Group check. Yeah, bitch. 10.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: 24.

MARISHA: 18.

LAURA: 20.

ASHLEY: 22.

SAM: Whoa.

LIAM: 15.

TALIESIN: Six.

MATT: Okay. Pretty decent spectrum there.

SAM: Mm-hmm.

TRAVIS: We suck.

MATT: The person drives by, and the flash you get of them, first off, the crawler is pretty well outfitted. You can see it's not as heavily armored as yours, but it looks like it definitely has seen some use. Where it doesn't have armor, it definitely has a lot more jagged don't touch me elements added to it. A lot of spears and spikes and elements where you gather most folks will try to avoid it or be impaled on it. The driver, you can see heavy goggles on, looks to be a dark brown shawl and a cloak that's pulled over the front of their face. Who rolled a 24?

SAM: I did.

MATT: You did. What you do catch is from where it's flapping from their face and pulling aside, there are these reds streaks right there. Their skin looks like it's deeply sand, possibly sun scarred, like my forehead. A little darker, but it has--

MARISHA: (laughs)

SAM: What happened?

MATT: Since our honeymoon, it never quite went away.

SAM: Oh, okay. (laughter)

MARISHA: A very personal thing to know.

MATT: I don't know why I said it, but I did. (laughter)

LIAM: Let me just toss this out here.

MATT: I don't know why I said that. (laughter)

LIAM: You have to talk quite a lot.

TRAVIS: That was very detailed.

MATT: I do.

SAM: Let's all go around and say one weird thing about themselves.

MARISHA: About our bodies.

SAM: Yeah, I have butt problems. (laughter)

TRAVIS: One nipple's higher than the other. (laughter)

LIAM: I'm fascinated with my pores. (laughter)

MATT: Ah, really, really warm on the back of my neck suddenly. (laughter)

LIAM: Sun scar.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MATT: Yes. Anyway. Sorry. Yeah, red streaks down the cheeks there.

SAM: That look painted on or like they've been crying blood?

MATT: Too fast to see.

LAURA: Ooh.

SAM: Okay, okay, okay. Okay.

MATT: But you do clock that there are some people in Bassuras that you've seen with one or both of those as well.

SAM: Ah.

MATT: Actually, you grew up in Bassuras. You would know that to be the mark of the Fists of the Ruiner.

SAM: Fist of the Ruiner.

MATT: Often members that particular faction in Bassuras will get bloody long, dragging tear marks under one or both eyes.

LIAM: Got it.

SAM: And that's a sign of high ranking?

MATT: Mm-hmm.

SAM: Okay. Like they get one, then they get the other.

MATT: Correct.

SAM: Cool. Orym, it was a marking of Fist of the Ruiner!

LIAM: What are you saying?

SAM: I'll tell you when we stop! (coughing) (laughter)

MATT: You tear up the now slow incline at the opposite side of the bridge coming towards the edge. Now you can see the direction you're traveling, that there is another much smaller mesa peak to the one that holds Bassuras. This one has like a weird kidney shape almost. It's about maybe a quarter of the size if not smaller than the one that holds the city. The ravine wraps entirely around it into the continuation of the gorge to the opposite side and southward as well. But, Fearne, as you're getting closer to that edge, Birdie shouts over her shoulder, "This up ahead's where our hideaway is. So we're not too terribly far, maybe an hour, hour and a half out at most."

ASHLEY: Okay! We're only about an hour, hour and a half at most!

LAURA: (chuckles)

SAM: Okay.

LAURA: (screams) (laughter)

MATT: Coming up to the other side of this bridge, tearing up to the very edge where you can see these, what looks like rock previously, and it looks like maybe elements of rock have been placed around it. There are massive metal bolts that are driven into the side of this to hold and keep the bridge itself mounted on the side of this massive mesa. As you're hitting the crest of it, you, Orym, pick up that on the mesa that you are approaching, the top flat plateau that is lifted above the ravine, there are a number of hills and rocks. But you see on one to the right, it would be the south side of this. You see a humanoid figure standing at the top. You go over and clock it, and then it vanishes beneath the rock.

LIAM: Like anything we've ever seen before? Anyone? Or too far?

MATT: Way too far.

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: It just looks like a person maybe.

LIAM: Okay.

TRAVIS: It's a groundhog.

LAURA: Woo.

SAM: Yep. Sand people.

TRAVIS: (animalistic warbling)

MATT: It's about this time, Orym, you also notice--

TRAVIS: Aw, shit.

MATT: Because you have the world's highest fucking passive perception.

LIAM: Strap in, it's only going higher. (laughter)

MATT: That's true. As you notice this, you glance back, still clutching onto FCG, and you see a weird wisp of smoke that's like vanishing from the direction of where you came from, high up in the air.

LIAM: So smoke trailing from the city does it look about, or just behind?

MATT: It's not trailing. It's a little cloud of a dark smoke that is dissolving and vanishing.

LIAM: Flare. Okay. I will try to go look all around as possible. Do I see anyone in any other direction?

MATT: Roll a perception check.

LIAM: Yeah, well. It's not going to be as good as that passive. Two 12s for a 18.

MATT: 18. Glancing around, you can see where that cloud was, and there's a faint trail from below. You're like, this is some sort of a flare or a marker or something. Just by the way that it's suddenly burst and has been fading. It very much gives you that sense.

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: At which point, as you're heading over the top of the hill--

LIAM: Before we get too-- I will call out to the group and say, guys, there's folks around or something. Look lively.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: Fireworks?

MATT: As you're heading up the edge of the bridge to hit the actual stone floor at the beginning of this mesa, there is a pfft of dust. Like a bunch of earth has suddenly moved.

LAURA: Mage Armor.

MATT: Because Birdie and Fearne are at the front, and they're currently with you at back with your vision catching all this. This is all happening really rapidly.

LIAM: Mm-hmm.

MATT: You notice it a split second before you hit. There's some sort of a mechanical apparatus or a wire raised apparatus, like a metal grating or a net or some sort of a sudden trap-like fence line shoots up out of the ground that pretty much covers the length way and the width of the bridge about 40 feet beyond the entry point where you guys are now landing on the mesa. I need-- It would be the drivers of both, which would Birdie Calloway and you to make a dexterity saving throw. She gets advantage because you noticed it on your high perception.

LAURA: Did we take off in the morning or in the evening?

SAM: It was mid-morning.

TALIESIN: I get advantage because it's a dex save I can see.

SAM: Because we wanted to get back the same day.

MATT: That's true, because you're a barbarian.

LIAM: In time to meet the Paragon's Call.

LAURA: Did we do anything that would've caused a bunch of spells to be used before we left?

LIAM: Didn't we--

SAM: This was the same day that we fought Dusk.

LIAM: The same confrontation with you.

MARISHA: We had the confrontation with Dusk.

LAURA: Got it.

TALIESIN: 20.

MARISHA: That was all first thing in the morning.

MATT: 20, nice. You know what?

TRAVIS: No problem.

MATT: I'll roll out here for this.

LAURA: Ah!

LIAM: First time.

MATT: Okay. Not too bad. Not too bad. All right, so. Both vehicles, end up pulling up, as opposed to trying to tear off to the side. There's not enough room to turn. Both of the drivers instinctually gun it even harder, leaning into it to carry that lip off the bridge to try and lift over.

LAURA: Oh.

MATT: Kind of pushing as hard as they can. The legs (mechanical pounding) kicking off it like a ramp. Still hitting the tops of these things and breaking them and getting caught up a little bit, dealing a little bit of damage. Both of the machines--

LAURA: I'm going to telekinetic shove Laudna down onto the trailer to keep her from flying out of it.

MATT: Okay, good call.

MARISHA: (laughs)

MATT: Good call.

MARISHA: I am the weight of an acorn, so yes.

LAURA: Yeah. (laughter)

LIAM: Orym's going to Gust underneath FCG to lift as much as he can.

SAM: Nice.

MATT: Okay. Cool. Good call. Both crawlers take what would be 14 points of piercing damage. It is halved because they take half of that anyway, and then halved again because of the successful saves.

LAURA: Oh, nice.

MATT: So three points of bludgeoning damage to both of the crawlers.

SAM: Who's got the crawler stats? Oh, I guess you have one.

TALIESIN: I've got mine.

LIAM: Stats!

MATT: I have one, I have Birdie's. You guys should have the one for the-- There we go.

TRAVIS: Stats, stats, stats.

LIAM: Cute!

LAURA: Isn't it?

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: So. A hard landing impacting into the dirt. Both vehicles spin and wind a bit. As you begin to catch yourself, that area where that one figure stood up. you can see that it's two large rocky embankments that await that space there. There's some dead trees and some of scrub around. But as you tear into this space directly after landing, a shadow begins to emerge from around one of these rocks. You watch as, from around the edge, a large, metallic, automaton-like war machine curls around the corner with three tripod-like legs.

MARISHA: One of those things.

LAURA: One of the big ones? No!

MATT: Red flags adorned on its back flowing behind it. You can see, at a quick glance, three, maybe four figures on it across the center of it and one on top.

MARISHA: Does it look like the same one Otohan was riding on?

MATT: Well, there's the mammoth one, which is the much larger one that's more of a people mover. This one looks a little bit smaller, more compact. It's maybe about, I'll say, 18 to 20 feet tall.

SAM: Good god.

MATT: And about 15 feet wide, side to side.

MARISHA: That's the small one?

SAM: Good god.

MATT: That's the smaller one. At a quick glance, you can see there are a number of mounted rifles of different sizes along the center platform. On the top, one massive, muscular half-giant sits there holding the back of a column of multiple rifles attached and affixed in multiple layers. You saw something like this at the front of Imahara Joe's shop that stared you down for a moment before you entered. But this one is manned, mounted, and you can see well over two dozen different types of barrels with multiple inputs for black powder caps at the ready. As it whips around to both of you, and it stands there, blocking where you're currently standing. What do you do?

TALIESIN: I yell out, I believe it's Gajakhandas is the pronunciation of this group, I assume.

MATT: Well, you haven't seen what this group is yet.

TALIESIN: Oh, okay, well, I just saw that. Yeah, okay, I am going to pull hard to the left and see what happens and not slow down yet. Just veer off a little bit.

MATT: Veer off to the left?

TALIESIN: Yep.

MATT: Okay. So as you begin to coast around to the left hand side-- Okay, so what happens is immediately, a voice shouts out and rings and says, "Halt! Stop or die!"

TALIESIN: What are you all doing? What's mom doing?

ASHLEY: Those are very limited options.

LAURA: (laughs)

MATT: Birdie's turning a bit to the left and not expecting this to arrive.

ASHLEY: Are we stopping?

TRAVIS: Yeah, we should stop. I mean, we can just talk.

MATT: She looks back at you, like, "Do I go?"

ASHLEY: I think we should stop, I think we should stop.

MATT: "I can go, I can--"

ASHLEY: No, no, no, I think we should stop.

MATT: You careen around the side. Birdie begins to slow. (slowing thumps)

TALIESIN: Okay, I'm going to-- Can I try to pull the-- Well, I guess the legs don't skid. I can't drift with legs.

SAM: You can do it, sure.

TALIESIN: I'm going to try and skip and just pull, now that I've seen they're slowing down. I'm going to try and pull around. All right.

LIAM: Prancercise.

TALIESIN: So I'm joining, since you all slowed down.

MATT: As you go around the left hand side, heading into the area right next to where this massive thing is standing, you can see two other figures that are up there, rifles fixed on the ready, on their chests, locked onto your position.

TALIESIN: (screech)

MATT: Okay, you come to a stop?

TALIESIN: Yeah, I'm right next to them.

MATT: Okay, so one of the legs curls up and the other one just stays down and (skids) It does drift a little bit.

TALIESIN: It does drift a little.

SAM: Are me and Orym propelled by momentum?

MATT: I will have both of you--

LIAM: Water skiing.

LAURA: Like, yeah, what about the trailer?

MATT: Both of you roll strength saving throws for me.

LIAM: Oh, that's no good.

LAURA: What about the trailer in the back? What does that do?

MATT: We'll figure that out.

SAM: A strength save of four.

LIAM: 17.

MATT: Okay. So you hold onto FCG, which is great. You, however, do not hold on, so you go with him. (laughter) As the immediate turn of Birdie slowing down, you get flung upward and release the back of the vehicle that you've been holding onto. Both of you tumble in the air.

SAM: I don't have Feather Fall or anything, so that's it.

MARISHA: I do, Feather Fall.

MATT: Okay, so no damage sustained. As rapidly-- Well, you pulled aside.

MARISHA: Did it look bad enough like they were going to eat shit? I'm assuming.

MATT: They're about to eat shit, yeah. You know what, because you pulled ahead and the momentum carried them forward, then yeah, they would've been in range. You reach out and quickly and instinctively cast Feather Fall. And both of you (yelps) (gentle whoosh) And just come to rest there in that space.

SAM: I'm trying to make it look cool.

MATT: All right.

TALIESIN: We're doing this? We're doing this?

TRAVIS: God, we're just having a conversation.

ASHLEY: We're just talking.

TALIESIN: All right.

TRAVIS: And then stealing their shit.

ASHLEY: Yeah, good idea.

MATT: At this point, the massive Ruin-Crawler turns, and you can see there are these three, large, somewhat janky-looking legs made from multiple types of metal, but they still move with a uniquely dangerous speed at times. Like they look blocky. Then whenever it needs to react, they move very quickly and then stop and hold with a heavy creaking sound when they do. Up top, you can see the secondary platform shifts. You can see all manner of heavy metal plates that rise up to defend and protect, like a wall of armor to those who are inside. They're all holding onto these different mounted carbines and pistols that sit along the side.

LIAM: He's shorter, but Orym steps out in front of FCG, shield up.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: How many bodies can we see just as we've come to a stop and they turn and point their uglies at us?

MATT: At this point, you can see six.

TRAVIS: Six people? Okay.

LAURA, LIAM: (laugh)

MATT: There's a brief pause as the wind blows through a bit of dust, pushing across the intersection where you currently stand.

LIAM: How far are we away from them?

MATT: Well, you guys are probably about 20 or so feet from it, based on where you landed. So you're looking up at it right now. You're a little bit off to the side of it while Fearne, Birdie, and-- Yeah, Fearne, Birdie, and you would be about 20 feet behind them stopped in advance. During this pause, one of the figures stands up and puts up a large metallic hand cone that he holds over the front of his face. You see this to be a middle aged man, receding hairline cut short, a silver gray coloration with a little bit of salt and pepper in it. Face covered with some sort of a cloth mask. But similar red streaks down the front of its face. He looks armored. He currently has one arm resting over one of the mounted carbines. He leans forward and shouts, "You have been marked by his eye, and must pay tribute! Leave your belongings among the stone and rock he scarred, and leave in peace."

TRAVIS: Leave our belongings amongst the rock, and what?

MATT: "Then leave in peace!"

TRAVIS: Oh, leave in--

ASHLEY: We'll leave across the bridge that we just came.

MATT: "Back where you came from, yes!"

SAM: Oh.

LAURA: What if we need to go forward, though?

TRAVIS: Is there a toll we can pay?

MATT: He leans back and talks and the other guys, and there's one guy up there who's wearing this furred cloak who talks them for a bit, and shakes his head. "Leave your things, and then you can continue!"

ASHLEY: Says who?

MATT: "Says us!"

ASHLEY: I don't even know you.

SAM: I think they're the Fists of the Ruiner.

LAURA: Oh.

TALIESIN: Oh yeah.

SAM: Which is a faction.

LAURA: Oh.

SAM: Yeah.

ASHLEY: Okay.

TALIESIN: Yeah, that's right.

MATT: "Should I?"

SAM: But hey, ask your mom, is there a tithe, what do we do?

ASHLEY: Birdie, Birdie!

MATT: Birdie's like, "Well, you know--"

ASHLEY: Is this normal?

MATT: "No, this isn't normal at all, I mean, you got to look out for these guys, and I've had a couple of run-ins where I just either talked my way out, or just kept going as fast as I could until they disappeared. But I had a lot less people on my back, and traveling not as quickly as I normally would, so, I don't know."

MARISHA: I don't know.

LAURA: We don't have a lot of belongings here, just a backpack full of stuff. Do you just want our backpack?

MATT: There's another pause. The guy at the top, you see him flex his arms, and hold onto the back of this machine. "You may leave your backpacks on the ground, your weapons, any money you have, and your automatons."

TRAVIS: Is this the arrangement you have with the Paragon's Call? It seems rather unfriendly.

MATT: "There is no arrangements beyond the city!"

TRAVIS: Hmm.

MARISHA: Well, and just saying, you probably wouldn't want to attract the ire of the Paragon's Call, right?

SAM: I don't know.

TALIESIN: Yeah, I don't know if that's really--

LAURA: I'm going to pick up the backpack--

MATT: "(laughs)"

LAURA: -- from the car that we have, the crawler that we have, and go set it down by the leg of the Ruin-Crawler.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: We also have some coupons!

TALIESIN: There's some platinum in there, I don't know, but we're keeping our weapons, and our crawlers. We've got to go, I mean, if you really want to have a conversation, send a few Fists down here, we'll have it, we'll talk about it, but this what we got!

LAURA: I back up, back towards the crawler.

MATT: "(whistles)" A loud whistle--

LAURA: The crawlers are how far away?

MATT: From where you are right now?

LAURA: From the Ruin-Crawler.

MATT: Oh, about 30 or so feet.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: Or more depending on, I mean, Birdie stopped first. But there's the loud whistle and you see two more figures step out from behind where you were, that were hiding amongst the brush and the trees.

LIAM: Down on the ground level, yeah?

MATT: Ground level, yeah, and they have their rifles situated up against their-- one of them has a pistol, and is holding it out, like they don't really know how to hold it properly, and they're too squared, and awkward, and bent. All wearing various bits of masks and cloth to hide their faces. The leader says, "You are right. You do not know who I am!"

TRAVIS: (laughs)

MATT: "But I will change that, for you will, after this day, tell everyone you meet that you met the ire of Maricris!" "tell everyone you meet that you met the Ire of Maricris!"

TALIESIN: Maricrish, Mare Chris?

LAURA: The Ire of Marry Christmas?

MATT: (forcefully) "Maricris!"

TALIESIN: Maricris.

LAURA: Just side note, where is Maricris? Where is he in relation to the backpack I just set down?

MATT: He's on the front of the center part--

ASHLEY: Oh, just...

MATT: -- of this large automaton.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: So, he's leaning on the front, by where the metallic guard wall is.

LAURA: Okay. I'm going to use my Mage Hand to set the timer off, and blow up the bomb.

MARISHA: Nice.

SAM: How-- what--

TALIESIN: Wait, is it close enough to her to do it?

LAURA: I set it next to the leg of the Ruin-Crawler.

TALIESIN: Okay, yeah.

MATT: You did.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: How much time you putting on there?

LIAM: Can it be instant?

LAURA: Instant, because we're far enough away?

MATT: Okay!

LIAM: Oh, well, we're 20 feet away.

LAURA: We're--

LIAM: No, Orym and FCG are 20 feet--

SAM: We're 20 feet closer than you.

LAURA: Then in your heads, before I do this, you hear: Back up a little. And then I set it off.

MATT: Okay.

ASHLEY: Oh.

MATT: Okay! So. (laughter)

SAM: Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy.

TRAVIS: What, what?

MARISHA: This is it.

MATT: The two of you, I assume, back up.

SAM: We're going to scoot back a little, yeah.

MATT: "Leave your things! Place them here! Pay homage and greatness to the Ruiner!"

TRAVIS: Yeah, sounds good. I hop off of the crawler.

MATT: (laughs) "Great, now, the rest of you, if you would--" (booming) (laughter) There is a momentary (fingers snap) flash of light before the sound hits you, this (crashing explosion) massive explosion that suddenly rocks the ground beneath it. You see stone go flying in all directions. For a brief second, especially-- all of you at this proximity, your ears immediately ring. I do need the two of you to make a dexterity saving throw, because while you're not in the immediate explosion, there is shrapnel, or at least--

TRAVIS: Yes!

MATT: -- rock thrown up by this explosion.

SAM: 18.

LIAM: Eight.

LAURA: (splutters)

MATT: You manage to pull away from the bulk of it, and only take three points of piercing damage. You take six.

LIAM: Okay.

MARISHA: Should we run?

MATT: But as you all step back a bit, the smoke that surrounds it sits there, and you see the front leg of the tripod is fucked up! (laughter) It's still holding itself there, but it's, (screeching) and you can see one of the blue metallic energy, arcane energy devices that's affixed to it is partially dislodged, and roughly hanging. The front of it is covered in dark black soot and stone. Actually, I'm going to-- Because it did, with that proximity, I'm going to roll for everyone on the machine, so--

TALIESIN: Thank you for getting that--

LAURA: Yeah, I was worried about--

TALIESIN: I was very excited. Well, anyway, you grabbed it. I'm like: Oh thank god, this is good.

MATT: All right, so that's a failure on them. Go ahead and roll damage for me on that. That's going to be 6d6 damage.

SAM: All right, all right. Just so we know, in case our--

MATT: Sorry, 8d6, you guys bought a large bomb, and this is not immediate proximity, this is from about 15 feet away--

LAURA: Two, four, six--

MATT: Partially guarded.

SAM: In case our next move after this is to run, are they blocking the entire span of how we would flee?

MATT: Let me show you. Since we have now engaged an aggressive point, we can figure out what that spatial awareness is here in just a moment, but roll damage.

SAM: Come on, show me--

ASHLEY: Oh.

SAM: Show me fours, fiveses, and sixeses.

LAURA: Well, there's fives.

ASHLEY: We have some fives.

LAURA: 15, 19, 20, 23, 26, 26.

MATT: 26, okay.

SAM: Good, well, that's good.

LAURA: Eh.

ASHLEY: That one, that busted the leg for sure.

MATT: All right, so that is. So, the leg's dinged up a little bit, and put inward, not certain as to how close it is to collapse, or if it can still shift or move, we'll find out. The rest of them-- 26 there.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

MATT: Well, good for him.

SAM: Matt's doing math!

MATT: I know. All right, let me show you where we're at.

ASHLEY: Ooh!

LAURA: Oh god, we're dead.

TALIESIN: Oh yeah!

SAM: Here we go. I'm going to say something. I don't know which one I'm supposed to say. Unlock all four Spelljammer prequel adventures on D&D Beyond?

TALIESIN: Sure.

TRAVIS: Oh yeah.

MARISHA: Okay.

SAM: At DNDBeyond.link/CRspace? (oohing)

TRAVIS: Ooh!

MATT: There we go.

ASHLEY: Oh.

TRAVIS: Yo.

ASHLEY: Oh, whoa!

MATT: Oops, sorry.

SAM: Oh, we were--

MARISHA: Look at the snake in the tree!

SAM: I think I was supposed to do the other one! (laughter) Our Battle Cam sponsorship is back! I'll get to it later. (laughter)

MATT: So, they start back here, and these would've-- the guys would've moved over to this point here, and this point here, with their rifles out.

SAM: Oh shit.

ASHLEY: Oh. Oh, we are--

MATT: You both are back here, backing away from the explosion, and trying to keep your proper distance from where that detonation took place.

SAM: The kaboom.

MATT: You pulled off to this side, and stopped in that space at that moment.

TRAVIS: The cliff edge is behind us, right?

SAM: Look at that thing!

MATT: Correct, about 40 feet behind you.

SAM: It's got a real gun on it! Like a real gun! (laughter)

ASHLEY: Oh man.

TALIESIN: Pretty sure it's plastic, but yeah.

SAM: It's loaded!

MATT: So, this is the space--

MARISHA: Pew, pew, pew, pew.

MATT: -- of which you currently stand, and--

TALIESIN: Anything we should be aware of that's off map right now, or is this pretty much the--?

MATT: This is pretty much where you can see. Oh, and there is the--

TALIESIN: Okay.

MATT: Sorry, there's the two other gun carriers that are up there right now.

LIAM: Did you finish your math on that explosion, by the way?

MATT: Yes.

LIAM: As soon as Orym shakes off getting hit by shrapnel, and brushes it off, he starts sprinting towards the vehicle.

TALIESIN: Ditto.

MATT: Towards the vehicle?

SAM: Towards the vehicle!?

LIAM: Yep. Mm-hmm.

MARISHA: Which one?

SAM: You madman.

LIAM: We're surrounded.

TALIESIN: Yep. Mm-hmm.

LIAM: Towards the crawler.

MATT: Well, let's roll initiative now-- (groaning) Since you've detonated a bomb and the point of conversation is now over.

MARISHA: (laughs) I thought we were running.

LIAM: I got one.

TRAVIS: I thought we disabled them, then we were going to drive around it.

MARISHA: I thought we were running.

MATT: That-- I mean, you guys-- you don't know what you've done it, and you can still take hat tactic if you like.

MARISHA: That's true.

MATT: We're just in initiative order now because you've definitely made an aggressive maneuver on them. All righty.

SAM: Oh boy.

MATT: 25 to 20.

LIAM: Natural 20 for a 25. (cheering)

LAURA: No, ignore that, I just-- next time.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: Ignore what?

LAURA: Nothing, I was-- Nothing.

MATT: 20 to 15?

LAURA: 17.

TALIESIN: 16.

MATT: Great, okay.

SAM: Dun, dun, dun, dun! Dun, dun, dun, dun. I like how the backpack on the back of this--

MATT: 15 to 10.

SAM: -- crawler--

TRAVIS: 15.

ASHLEY: 11.

SAM: -- looks like a little diaper. Um, 10 over here.

MARISHA: Oh, it does. (laughs) For those horse poop beds.

LAURA: Oh, wait, you both rolled 10?

MATT: What's your dexterity?

ASHLEY: I rolled 11.

TRAVIS: Uh.

LAURA: Oh, okay, durn.

TRAVIS: 14.

ASHLEY: I rolled 11.

MATT: 14, okay, yeah, so you'll go--

ASHLEY: Got excited, though, for Rollies.

LAURA: I know, me, too. I really thought that would maybe--

MATT: Actually, he will be-- he was actually on this one.

SAM: He can teleport!

MATT: Exactly, oh my god.

TRAVIS: Oh no.

MATT: All right, and you got which one?

ASHLEY: 11.

MATT: 11, okay.

TRAVIS: Then Laudna was 10.

LAURA: Oh, so you guys get to--

ASHLEY: She was seven.

MARISHA: Technically seven.

LAURA: You, oh, you're seven.

TRAVIS: Oh.

MARISHA: Yeah.

SAM: Was--

TRAVIS: Chetney, Fearne, FCG.

SAM: Aren't we pulling a cart behind one of these things?

LAURA: Yeah, there was a cart behind the Ashton one.

SAM: The Ashton one?

LAURA: The Ashton one had the cart.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

SAM: Wait, no, that can't be--

LAURA: Yeah.

SAM: -- because we were also behind the Ashton one.

LAURA: No, you were behind the Fearne one.

LIAM: No, we were behind Fearne and Birdie.

SAM: Oh, okay.

MATT: Right, so were you guys in the cart, then?

LAURA: Yes, me and Laudna, and--

SAM: Loud-na.

LAURA: Hand-eer? Hondir?

SAM: Hondir? Hondir?

MATT: Hondir was on the back of the vehicle.

LAURA: Oh, got it, okay, and then we were on there.

MATT: We'll save that there just to give you the idea.

LAURA: That's fine, because I went and put the backpack there anyway, so I would've been standing outside.

MATT: That's true. You would be over in this space.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: There, probably, after doing that. Okay.

SAM: Oh man, we're going to get shot with guns.

LAURA: Yep!

MATT: So, it's the top of the round. Orym, it's your turn. The first thing you hear is a voice go, "What the fuck was that?" (laughter) You're up.

LIAM: Orym plunges into the smoke of the explosion, and I'll use my movement, and probably my action to run up to the base of it, leap, so use 30 to get right at the base, and then use his boots to spring twice, or three times, if necessary, to parkour all the way up to the top level.

MATT: (small landing impact)

LIAM: Movement and action.

MATT: All the way to the top?

LIAM: Yep.

MATT: Okay. Yeah, you can get you there.

TALIESIN: Mm!

LAURA: Oh my gosh.

MATT: Put you right about there.

LIAM: Action surge, I'm going to trip this motherfucker. (laughter)

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: Boom, pitta, boing, boing, boing, whoop, ah!

LIAM: It is a 19 to hit.

MATT: 19 to hit definitely hits.

LIAM: Okay, so he has to--

MATT: He's only got a breastplate.

LIAM: -- beat a strength save--

TRAVIS: (pained grunt)

LIAM: -- of a 16. (laughter)

MATT: 16. He rolled a natural 16 with higher than that. He's a strong motherfucker. So, you hit him, he's (grunts, growls) Gives you a growl, and he's clutching the back of this device.

LIAM: So that's not much damage to the total of 10. Then I swipe again, and try to drive the blade right through his calf.

SAM: Oof.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: That's a hit for the same. That's a 19 to hit.

MATT: Okay, that definitely hits.

LIAM: Has to beat a 16.

MATT: That's cocked. That's going to be actually a 17 total.

LIAM: (groans) 18, okay. So, eight, that second slash.

MATT: All right, got it.

LIAM: There I am.

MATT: So, you strike him again. He (grunts) pulls his leg up and starts to try and kick you off the side, pushing you at bay because it's only really room for one person.

LIAM: Can't overstuff, man. That's the end of the turn.

MATT: Okay, finishing Orym's go. It's now his turn.

LAURA: Okay.

TRAVIS: Yeah, let's see what you got, potato gun!

LAURA: What's his name, Ire? No--

LIAM: Well, no, the Ire of--

LAURA: Oh, Maricris.

MATT: Maricris.

TALIESIN: Maricris.

TRAVIS: Maricris!

LAURA: Mare--

SAM: ♪ Mare Christmas ♪ (laughter)

MATT: Oh my god.

LIAM: Oh dear.

SAM: ♪ To you ♪

MARISHA: We ruin everyone!

MATT: He goes, "Want to throw Katshery off?" Oh, no, sorry.

SAM: Oh, is that a--

MATT: "Kshatriya!"

LAURA: Ugh.

MATT: " --in person!" (whoosh)

LAURA: Oh, it's a name.

MATT: Whips it around, and is going to try, and first, they're going to spin it, they're trying to hit you with it.

LIAM: Okay.

TRAVIS: Oh, shit.

LIAM: Cool, cool, cool.

TRAVIS: They just working on an oil derrick.

MATT: That's going to be a 20 to hit.

LIAM: Uh, sure.

MATT: Okay. You don't take too much on that, just eight points of bludgeoning damage.

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: But I do need you to make a strength saving throw.

LIAM: My highest thing. Pretty good for me, 19.

LAURA: Ooh.

MATT: 19, okay.

TRAVIS: Yeah!

MATT: You hold on. He swings it around, and you're going to get the hit, but you grab onto the side and get back up, as he moves around again, and is going to start (humming sound)

TRAVIS: Yes!

MATT: You see him pull back on these two--

TRAVIS: Yes!

MATT: -- string portions of it, and yank the chains out. As it does (explosions) three of them begin going off--

TRAVIS: Yes!

MATT: You're up close and personal, you can see there's hundreds of these caps of these various points of black powder little packets that are jammed into different parts of these dozens--

ASHLEY: Oh, whoa!

MATT: -- and dozens of long metal, oblong pipes of different sizes, and widths, and lengths. As it begins to go, they're slowly spinning, (clicking) and going, and smoke's going, poof, poof, poof off the side. He's having to hold onto this as it's going! (laughter)

LIAM: Matt?

MATT: Yeah?

LIAM: This is the same day we battled Yu.

LAURA: Yes.

LIAM: You got to remove the damage to the giant.

MATT: It's not the same day. You guys rested afterward.

LIAM: Did we?

LAURA: We did?

SAM: No, no, we fought Dusk this morning, didn't we?

MATT: No, that's right. You're right, you did not.

SAM: Yeah.

LIAM: So I did no damage, I made it up to the top and that's it.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: Because you don't have an action surge--

LIAM: Because I used my action surge in the morning.

MATT: So, you struck twice, and then both of them hit the armor on the side of the leg. Still swings it around, comes back, and is going to now unleash three shots out of the--

TRAVIS: Mind that cannon, Orym! Eight seconds!

MATT: Katria Special. (laughter) All right, so these.

TRAVIS: Wait for the buckle! (laughter)

MATT: It's going to shoot one shot at Laudna, one shot at Imogen, and one shot at FGC, just (fired shots) across the way there.

LAURA: Okay, yeah--

MATT: Because you are more than 20 feet from it, both shots are at disadvantage.

LAURA: Okay.

SAM: Oh, okay.

MATT: So, that's going to be 15.

LAURA: Nope.

MATT: (impact) It manages to streak off the arcane bit of body armor that you've just recently put on yourself. The one against you, Laudna. That's going to be a 13.

MARISHA: 13's my AC.

MATT: 13 manages to still hit you. All right, so one of the shots, even as wild as he's arcing it past (fired shots) It does still manage to strike you in the shoulder, and it hurts like a motherfucker. This will put you at--

TRAVIS: This is pretty crazy-- whoa!

MARISHA: (yells)

MATT: 10 points of piercing damage.

SAM: Ouch.

MARISHA: The fuck!

MATT: Then, FCG, that is going to be a 20 to hit.

SAM: Yeah, sure.

MATT: You take 12 points of piercing damage.

SAM: Aw! I'll take it.

MATT: He is just holding on slowly as-- and you can watch as each blast hits, the whole thing's rocking back, the whole top of the vehicle is being moved with the impact, and he's-- His muscles are bulging, just trying to keep it pressure on that point.

MARISHA: Immediately, I'm in a rage, and I say: The fuck! I throw it back, and I do Hellish Rebuke!

TRAVIS: Yeah!

MATT: Nice, all right. Is that a constitution saving throw or dexterity save?

TRAVIS: ♪ Return to sender! ♪

MARISHA: 16 dex.

MATT: 16 dex, that is going to be a 14. That's a failure.

MARISHA: Eyy! (babbles) Cool, 13 damage.

SAM: To him or the weapon?

MARISHA: To him?

MATT: To him.

SAM: I don't know how Hellish--

MARISHA: He's the caster.

MATT: He's the one who's holding it, so it's towards the operator of it.

SAM: Okay, nice.

MATT: Okay, cool, so he goes ahead and-- Describe to me your Hellish Rebuke on him after you get struck with a bullet.

MARISHA: I see the black powder that is exploding around him, and I take it and I focus in on it and I send it directly into his eyes and push this burning fuel into his face.

MATT: He's now coughing. It's almost like the smoke itself became a Facehugger and is onto is face, and he's coughing angrily as he's still holding the machine. (heavy gunshots) All right, cool, that's going to finish his-- No, wait. No, he's going to Action Surge and he's going to attempt to try and kick you off twice.

LIAM: Let's get it.

MATT: These are both shove attacks, so it's your... Actually with this, because this would be your athletics or acrobatics, I think, to try and--

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: Actually, wait, let me double check.

LIAM: Can I try to roll under that thing?

MATT: Let me try, double check.

LIAM: I'm right where I want to be.

MATT: It's been a little bit, and I want to make sure I'm not fucking up rules because I would hear about it forever.

SAM: No, Matt. The internet is forgiving.

MATT: You're sweet. Yeah, it is... Yeah, so it's your athletics or acrobatics, sorry, is what it should be.

LIAM: Okay. For both, same for both, or roll for each time?

MATT: For each time, you roll one, because he's going to try and kick you off twice.

LIAM: Okay, well, that's 25 first. The first time he kicks, and you duck beneath the gun and then duck under his leg. Second time is a 15.

MATT: The second time for him is going to be an 18 total.

LIAM: That does it.

MATT: So you get knocked onto the edge of this, and fold off the edge. Make a dexterity saving throw to see if you can grab the side of it as you fall.

TRAVIS: ♪ Hold onto the edge of this ♪

LIAM: (laughs) Dexterity? That is 14.

MATT: 14, you catch onto the edge, so you don't plummet from the top, but you are definitely considered prone and are dangling off the side. As far as he's concerned, he just full-on Leonidas kicked you off the front of that vehicle and is now back and focusing on the gun. That finishes his go. Imogen, you're up, with Ashton on deck.

LAURA: Okay, I'm going to step directly in front of the crawler.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: In front of FCG. Thereabouts.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: Not quite that far.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: I'm going to try to aim, point my hand straight up to where I'm pointing at him.

MATT: Mm-hmm.

LAURA: My eyes are going to flare white, hair flies up in the air, and I'm going to Lightning Bolt.

MATT: Shit, okay.

LAURA: Straight up through the gun.

TRAVIS: Yeah!

LAURA: Into him.

MARISHA: Through the scope!

ASHLEY: Cool.

SAM: Oh yeah!

MATT: You can hit three guys and the vehicle all in one go.

LAURA: Killer.

ASHLEY: Cool!

SAM: Nice.

TALIESIN: Yeah!

MATT: (lightning crashes) It unleashes this torrent, this angry torrent of white, lavender-purple lightning streaks upward, blasting out into the sky above.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Roll damage on that.

LAURA: He does a dexterity save, and this ignites any flammable objects--

SAM: Oh no.

LAURA: In its path, that isn't being worn or carried.

MATT: Worn or carried, okay.

LAURA: So anything on the car.

TRAVIS: The black powder charges in the gun?

LAURA: Yeah.

LIAM: The hundreds, the tens, however many that was described?

TRAVIS: How close are you now?

MATT: They do have half cover because they're inside, so they do get a bonus to their dexterity saving throws.

LAURA: Okay.

TALIESIN: They see her?

MATT: Actually, the leader guy does roll a 22 total. He rolled really well.

LAURA: Okay.

MARISHA: ♪ But this is still fucking cool ♪

MATT: The other guy fails, and the gunner... fails!

TRAVIS: Yeah.

LAURA: 19, 20, 22, 23.

MATT: 23.

SAM: Nice!

MATT: The leader of them, Maricris, goes (grunts) and ducks down, and it singes the top of his head. That energy is arcing all across the metal. It's conductive material, so now the energy crackles through the midsection where they are. The guy behind him turns and goes, "What?" (explosion) Gets blasted in the chest, 21 points of damage on him. He had already been damaged by the explosion of the bomb earlier, and he gets completely incinerated. (cheering)

SAM: He just wanted our stuff.

LAURA: I know, well, I wasn't trying to kill him. I was just trying to--

TRAVIS: What do you mean?!

LAURA: I was just trying to ignite the--

TRAVIS: What do you mean you weren't trying to kill him?

SAM: His flesh fused with the vehicle!

TRAVIS: Nothing about that looks less than lethal.

MATT: He falls, he's like (groans) and collapses on the inside, smoke coming up. He's like, "Shit!"

TRAVIS: You sent 100,000 volts in their direction.

MATT: The guy up top takes--

TRAVIS: (deep energy noise)

MATT: The guy up top gets blasted, who's mounting this machine, takes the brunt of it like, "(groans)" Orym, you don't see this, but you see a little bit of smoke rise up from above as you see the blast arc past, and your fingers, the way you're clutching the side of the vehicle, tingle, and you have to hold on tightly as best you can as all the muscles tense up and you feel the electrical energy disperse throughout your arm.

ASHLEY: Cool.

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: But he's still standing, just not happy.

MARISHA: Does it pop those charges?

LAURA: Did it do anything, yeah, to the black powder?

SAM: Did it shoot all the bullets at us?

MATT: Hmm.

SAM: Ballistics, how do they work?

MARISHA: Yeah. (laughs)

TRAVIS: They explode. They will fire at whatever they're pointing at.

MARISHA: Yeah, there's got to be someone--

LAURA: Ignites flammable objects!

SAM: Oh boy.

TRAVIS: Careful where you point that.

LAURA: I'm right in front of it!

SAM: But they're also inside a thing.

TALIESIN: They're in caps, so they can go wherever. It's shrapnel.

MATT: (laughs)

TRAVIS: Or tubes.

MATT: So here's the thing. There are right now 237 charges loaded into this, and 237 bullets.

TALIESIN: Oh wow.

SAM: Oh god.

TRAVIS: Half cover, at least.

MATT: I'm going to say the ones that are surface-struck by this go off, so I'm going to put that at about 60.

LAURA: Oh god.

MATT: That's 60 shots that all at once, (exploding whoosh) out of the front of this gun. It is aimed loosely in the direction of the front of this vehicle, so I'm going to take, with disadvantage, a number of shots at everybody in the way here as it just arcs in a-- (laughter)

LAURA: TPKed the party!

SAM: You get shot 47 times. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Awesome! Oh-- (impacts)

TALIESIN: Nat 20, nat 20, nat 20, nat 20.

SAM: Platoon, platoon, platoon.

MATT: I'm sorry.

TRAVIS: (pained grunts)

MATT: Okay, so I'm just rolling damage on it here.

LIAM: Kyle, bring in the squibs.

MATT: So Ashton, I'm going to say this.

LAURA: Oh no! I'm sorry.

TALIESIN: All right.

ASHLEY: It was a really cool idea.

SAM: It's a great idea.

TALIESIN: It's a great idea.

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: Okay, no, that works out. About five shots per person coming across this way here. Yeah, we'll go with that. So five shots on you with disadvantage.

TRAVIS: I'm here for it.

MATT: Natural one. 16.

TALIESIN: That's my AC.

SAM: Wait, is he going to roll 60 times?

TRAVIS: No, five each.

MATT: Five each.

SAM: Yeah, but, okay.

LAURA: They don't just explode in the gun, they literally shoot?

SAM: That's 35 times.

MARISHA: 35 times, yeah.

TRAVIS: That's what happens when you strike a bullet. It explodes in the gun, and then it goes out the barrel.

MATT: It's the propulsion of the explosion that fires the bullet.

TRAVIS: It's a controlled explosion.

MATT: (laughs)

TRAVIS: You thought it was going to--

LAURA: I just thought if all of them ignited at once, it would explode the gun.

SAM: There are multiple bullets in the gun.

MATT: We'll get to that moment here shortly.

LAURA: Oh god!

MATT: Because it's going to do something to it.

LAURA: My brain didn't process the damage that this was going to do.

MATT: That's okay, you know, you grew up on a farm.

LIAM: I see Fjord sitting--

MATT: She's a horse girl.

LAURA: I don't know how guns work!

LIAM: -- on a backwards chair on his ship going, "So you decided to base your fantasy on real world shit." (laughter)

MARISHA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: You decided to blow up the bullet.

MATT: That's six points of piercing damage.

MARISHA: Someone's tried this.

TRAVIS: Oh yeah.

MATT: Natural one again. A two and a three, and then the final one, yeah. So you get shot once. The other four miss. All of them, just a full-on, immediate spray in the space in front of it. Hodir.

LIAM, MARISHA: Oh dear.

LAURA: I thought it was Hondir.

MATT: Hondir, I mean. Sorry.

ASHLEY: Oh no!

MATT: Hondir.

SAM: ♪ Hold the door ♪

MATT: That's one--

LAURA: Yeah.

MARISHA: Yeah. (laughs)

MATT: -- hit that misses, thankfully.

SAM: Hold the Honda.

MATT: Misses.

LAURA: Honda dear.

TRAVIS: Okay. Okay.

SAM: Hold the Honda.

MATT: That misses as well.

LAURA: Honda.

TRAVIS: Okay.

SAM: Adorable.

MATT: That misses as well. He gets one hit.

TRAVIS: All right.

MATT: Actually, no. One of those would've hit, so he gets hit twice.

TRAVIS: Not twice!

MARISHA: Uh-oh.

MATT: 16. Hondir is unconscious. (screaming) Hondir's just like, "What's going on?" (impacts)

MARISHA: Oh my god!

MATT: And falls onto the ground. (laughter)

MARISHA: Oh no!

LIAM: We can fix this! We can fix this!

TALIESIN: We're going to have a crawler soon, guys! (laughter)

MATT: Laudna.

SAM: Oh no!

TALIESIN: We're going to have a crawler! I'm so excited.

MARISHA: Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

TALIESIN: That's ours!

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah, yeah. (laughs)

MATT: So, that is going to be a--

LIAM: It was a baller move.

MATT: -- 17.

MARISHA: Uh-huh.

TALIESIN: I love it.

LAURA: Oh no!

MARISHA: For just the first one?

LIAM: Finally bad.

MATT: Just the first one. You take 11 points of piercing damage.

MARISHA: This does not look good.

SAM: Oh god.

MARISHA: Uh-huh.

LAURA: (nervous noises)

MATT: There we go, that'll work fine there. Stay, buddy.

LAURA: It's all fun and games 'til everybody dies.

MATT: Fuck it, whatever.

MARISHA: This is how we TPK, which is great.

MATT: I'll stick it--

MARISHA: (laughs)

SAM: This is your goldfish moment.

LAURA: Yeah, this is my goldfish! (laughter)

MATT: 21.

MARISHA: Yep.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: Oh god!

MATT: Seven points of piercing damage.

MARISHA: Okay.

SAM: Oh no.

MATT: That one is--

LIAM: Nott only blew up Caduceus, not the whole party.

MATT: -- 11, which I think misses you.

MARISHA: Miss.

MATT: Natural one.

MARISHA: Miss.

MATT: The last one is a 13.

MARISHA: Hits.

TALIESIN: Oof.

MATT: Okay. So that's going to be seven points of piercing damage.

SAM: Oh god.

TALIESIN: Oof!

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: Oof! That guy over there.

LAURA: Yes, yes.

SAM: Yikes.

TRAVIS: Laudna's missing half her face.

MATT: That hits. Hits.

TRAVIS: I feel--

MATT: For 16. Miss.

TRAVIS: -- slightly different. (laughter)

MATT: Hit.

SAM: You're Swiss cheese.

MARISHA: Yeah. (laughs)

MATT: And hit. He got hit four times. That sucks for him back there.

LAURA: Okay.

ASHLEY: Oh, one of the bad boys?

LAURA: They got hit, too?

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: He got hit three times.

ASHLEY: Great.

LAURA: Oh, he is. Great.

ASHLEY: I like that half box that's in the ground.

LAURA: Yeah, me, too. Oh!

MATT: He gets blown away.

MARISHA: That's good.

TALIESIN: Now I'm just going, do we try and not damage it any more so that we can take it?

LAURA: Yeah, yeah.

TALIESIN: Okay.

SAM: It's pretty cool.

MATT: So now, against--

LAURA: Me.

MATT: You, Imogen.

LAURA: Uh-huh.

MATT: That's going to be a 13.

LAURA: Miss.

MATT: 15.

LAURA: Miss.

MATT: 19.

SAM: What, is that a hit? What is that?

LAURA: Mm-hmm.

SAM: Aw.

MATT: You take eight points of piercing damage.

LAURA: Mm-hm.

MATT: Fourth one, it's a miss. It's a 12. And, 13.

LAURA: Okay. It's a miss. Yeah

MATT: One gets you, catches you, but just coasts by. FCG.

SAM: Okay, let's go.

MATT: First attack on you. Natural one.

SAM: No.

MATT: Second one. It's going to be a 22.

SAM: Yes.

MATT: You take double ones on damage. Four points of piercing damage.

SAM: Okay.

MATT: Third attack. That's going to be a 15.

SAM: No. Miss.

MATT: Second one is going to be a 24.

SAM: Hit.

MATT: You take, oh look at that, double sixes. This balances the Force.

LAURA: Uh.

MATT: You take 14 points of piercing damage.

SAM: Oh boy. Sure, sure.

MATT: Then the last one is going to be a 20 to hit.

SAM: Hit.

MATT: You then take seven points of piercing damage.

SAM: All right. Exciting.

MATT: Birdie Calloway.

LAURA: Oh no! (laughter)

SAM: Mom dies forever.

MATT: That's going to be a hit. A miss. A hit.

LIAM: A very powerful hit.

TRAVIS: Oh!

MATT: A natural one. Miss.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: And a miss. So two hits.

ASHLEY: Okay, two hits. Two hits.

LIAM: Two hits.

MATT: Eight and 11, so 23 points of damage to Birdie. She's thankfully inside the vehicle, so she has half cover while inside.

LAURA: That's good.

MATT: Fearne.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: That's going to be a 20.

ASHLEY: That'll hit.

MATT: You take 10 points of piercing damage.

ASHLEY: Okay.

LAURA: Oh god!

MATT: The second attack is going to be a 14.

ASHLEY: That does not hit.

MATT: All right. Third one. That's going to be a 19.

ASHLEY: That hits.

MATT: You take six points of piercing damage.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: Fourth one is going to be a 12.

ASHLEY: No.

MATT: The last one is going to be an 11.

ASHLEY: No.

LIAM: This was the third move of the combat.

LAURA: I know. I'm really sorry, guys.

MATT: No, I love this. This is great.

TRAVIS: This is great.

TALIESIN: This is chaos.

LIAM: I adore it, it's great. (laughter)

MATT: That's going to be a 13.

TRAVIS: Misses.

MATT: That's going to be a 15.

TRAVIS: Misses.

MATT: That's going to be a 12.

TRAVIS: Misses.

MATT: That's going to be a 12.

TRAVIS: Misses.

MATT: A 13 on that one. And then that's going to be a 21.

TRAVIS: Yep. Fuck, so close! You can't hit me, bitch! Ah!

MATT: 11 points of piercing damage to you.

TRAVIS: Okay.

MATT: (whoosh) Ting. Ping, ping! (impact)

TRAVIS: You fucking, ah!

MATT: The guy back there. That's going to be, that's a hit. Two natural 20s.

SAM: Oh yeah.

MATT: I'm not even joking. I'm going to take a picture of that.

SAM: He's dead.

LAURA: Oh.

MATT: That's crazy.

LIAM: Against which guy?

MATT: Against the guy back there.

LAURA: He just had it out for him.

MATT: Apparently. Okay. That's going to be a miss. A miss. And a hit. So two hits and a crit. So the first hit's going to be...

TRAVIS: Okay, he's having a bad day.

MATT: That's 15 plus the crit. He's done. Yeah, no. That's way over his-- Never mind.

MARISHA: Yay!

SAM: Yay! This was a great move, Laura.

ASHLEY: This was a great move.

MATT: Last one over here.

LAURA: We're not surrounded.

ASHLEY, SAM: No.

LIAM: Three? Got three.

MATT: Miss.

ASHLEY: Three.

LAURA: Okay.

LIAM: One on the crawler. Two on the ground.

MATT: Miss. Hit. Miss. And hit. So two hits on him. He takes seven.

LIAM: Just got to take care of Hondir.

MATT: 18 points.

LAURA: And Laudna. How far are you down?

MARISHA: I'm okay.

LAURA: You're all right?

MARISHA: I've got seven hit points. I'm okay.

SAM: Uh-huh, uh-huh.

LIAM: You're dead to start, so.

MARISHA: Yeah, I'm good.

LAURA: God.

MARISHA: I'm good!

TRAVIS: Can I bite you? Do you want to change?

MARISHA: Ooh.

TRAVIS: Uh-huh.

MATT: All right. So.

MARISHA: That's a lot of sub-categories.

MATT: After it scoots across, smoke billowing out of this machine after it just scattershots the entire front of this open space here, rocks being shot up in the air from each of these impacts, you all take a number of hits, dodge a bunch of them, and in a brief moment there's that pause of, what the fuck just happened? I now need to roll a constitution saving throw for this device.

TRAVIS: It has probably overheated. It's got a sizzling, red barrel.

MATT: That's a failure. The front of the Kshatriya Special--

SAM: Kshatriya.

MATT: -- bursts and fans open.

SAM: That's really nice.

MATT: And currently is nonfunctional. (cheering)

TRAVIS: (groaning) Good job!

MARISHA: Yeah. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Fuck.

MATT: You can see the guy, the musclebound figure holding it is like (groans), is still dealing with the aftermath of what you did and holding it as it just coasts in front of him without his control. He goes, "Shit!" That's the end of his go. That's your action.

LAURA: Uh-huh.

SAM: Bonus action!

LAURA: Bonus action.

SAM: I shoot everybody in the face. (laughter) (laughter)

TRAVIS: Chain Lightning!

LAURA: Oh my god. Nobody's within 30 feet of me, right?

TRAVIS: I mean, just your friends. (laughter)

MATT: Yeah.

TALIESIN: The guy in front, maybe.

MATT: Maybe Maricris.

LAURA: Maricris.

SAM: ♪ We wish you ♪

LAURA: Maricris, I'm going to try to push him off the back of the machine. (laughter)

MATT: Off the front, you mean?

LAURA: With Telekinetic Shove, yeah. I'm going to try to, yeah, pull him forward over the gun.

SAM: Is Maricris the gunner, or--

MATT: Natural 20.

LAURA: Okay.

TRAVIS: The guy with the green cape, right?

SAM: Oh, so he's in front.

MATT: Yeah, right there.

LAURA: He's in front.

MATT: He's in front there.

LAURA: For the rest of my move, I'm just going to--

MATT: You have 10 more feet, so.

TRAVIS: Apologize? (laughter)

LAURA: I'll apologize.

MATT: Sorry, five more feet.

LAURA: Five more feet? Then I'm going to stay here and try to block FCG.

MATT: Okay, you got it. Finishing your turn. Ashton, you're up.

TALIESIN: How much of that thing-- Does it look like guns are functional--

LIAM: Ruidusborn.

TALIESIN: -- on that thing or no?

MATT: Yeah, there are a number of mounted guns on the front. The main special itself is currently not functioning. It looks like whatever mechanism to its continued firing process has been utterly ruined.

TALIESIN: Whew!

MATT: There's just a plume of smoke.

TALIESIN: That's 40 feet. I can get to that thing.

LIAM: Oh, is the weapon ruined?

MATT: The top one is, yeah.

LIAM: The top one is, okay.

TALIESIN: Yeah, this is 40 feet. I can get to that. I'm going to run the 40 feet to the leg that we've already been fucking with.

MATT: Mm-hm. The front one there is what it would be.

TALIESIN: I'm going to rage.

MATT: All right.

TALIESIN: We'll see what the hell happens. All right. Okay, okay. Let's go. So as I get going, I get that weird black and white, the color starts to fade and everything starts to pull towards me as the gravity hits.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: I'm going to hit the damaged chunk of the leg.

MATT: Go for it.

TALIESIN: I'm going to give it a nice good whack. All right. I'm going to do this reckless, so I can really fuck with it.

MATT: Go for it.

TALIESIN: That's 16 to hit.

MATT: 16 misses.

TALIESIN: 16 misses the leg?

MATT: Well, it hits. It's just heavily armored.

TALIESIN: Oh, okay, okay, okay.

MATT: The first strike scrapes off the front of its metallic form.

LAURA: (Cockney accent) 16 misses the leg? (laughter)

TALIESIN: Bullshit. I go again.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: I'll give this thing another-- 18.

MATT: 18?

TALIESIN: Technically cocked. Actually, there was one that was cocked, and I rerolled it.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: 25.

MATT: 25 hits.

ASHLEY: That's good.

TALIESIN: That was cocked. That's-- 15 points of damage.

MATT: 15 points of damage to it. Got it. First strike scrapes across. The second one whacks into it. You can see the leg slightly shift from the impact. It's pretty damaged.

TALIESIN: (laughs) Oh, yeah.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

MATT: All right, does that finish your turn?

TALIESIN: That's everything I can-- I'm pretty sure that's everything.

MATT: All right, Chetney, you're up.

TRAVIS: (laughs) Fuck. Okay, I'm going to hop off the crawler. Run up Fearne's back and jump over the front.

SAM: Unnecessary, I like it. (laughter)

MARISHA: Parkour.

TRAVIS: I'm going to run towards the crawler.

MATT: All right, so that's 10, leap. (counting) 30 is right here.

TRAVIS: Fuck these little legs! I'm going to dash. I'm going to run up to the back legs of the crawler.

SAM: Back legs?

TRAVIS: Yeah.

TALIESIN: You're not going to fuck with the one I've been fucking with?

MATT: Your movement is 25?

TRAVIS: Yes.

MATT: Yeah. So you're about there.

TRAVIS: I only get halfway?

TALIESIN: What the fuck was--

TRAVIS: I look up and I'm going to say: Fuck you! (laughter) (laughter) And that's my turn. (laughter)

MARISHA: Oh my god. Yes!

MATT: All right.

ASHLEY: Oh my god.

MATT: With that, it is now-- Okay, so it's now Maricris' turn, who is extremely unhappy. Gets up and looks around and says, "What the fuck are you doing? Shit, shit, shit." He's going to grab the front of the rifle that he has.

TALIESIN: He's not within 15 feet of me technically, is he?

MATT: Technically, he would be just on the cusp of 15 feet.

TALIESIN: Okay, never mind. Damn.

MATT: He's going to, since you're right there banging the front of it. I don't know, but Imogen is the one who just roasted him and blew up his gun. He's going to go after Imogen. That makes sense. So he's going to take that carbine there that's mounted to the front. He's going to take two shots with it. Oof, that's going to be a 27 to hit.

LAURA: Yeah.

SAM: Ow, that hits.

MATT: Then a 22 to hit. So these shots, while they're not the same, but they are a little more impactful where they hit. So these are going to be...

LIAM: He's firing a mounted weapon?

MATT: Yes, on the front.

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: It's going to be 11 points of piercing damage.

LAURA: Okay.

SAM: I'll take half of that.

MATT: Okay, go for it.

SAM: (wincing) I guess.

LAURA: So you take five and I'll take six.

SAM: What do I do? I take all 11 and she takes half? How does this work? No, I take six, she takes five?

MATT: You both take five. When it's reduced by half, you both take the same amount.

LAURA, SAM: Okay.

MATT: Five to each. The second shot, you take eight points of piercing damage.

LAURA: All right.

MATT: Didn't roll that well for that. [intense horn blast]

SAM: (imitates horn blast)

MATT: He is going to bonus action Second Wind.

LAURA: Uh-oh.

TALIESIN: Oh no.

MATT: To heal himself.

LAURA: Oh, he healed himself.

TALIESIN: Got to reload something. Oh no, it's a mounted gun.

SAM: That was Maricris or the gunner?

MATT: This is Maricris.

SAM: Okay.

MATT: Maricris is going to Action Surge.

SAM: Oh shit.

MARISHA: Where are you, Orym? You're hanging off the side?

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: He's going to take... He's going to take two more shots at you, Laudna. He's trying to take you down.

LAURA: I'm Imogen.

MATT: Sorry.

MARISHA: Every time. I don't know. It's Laura, Laudna.

LAURA: He's Vax. I'm Vex.

MATT: I know. I don't know why. Whatever.

LIAM: Oh dear.

SAM: Maybe we should just change names.

MATT: (screaming) No!

LAURA: Should I just be Laudna?

MARISHA: Do you just want to be Laudna? Let's change characters right now.

MATT: That's a natural one. That's going to be a 17.

LAURA: It hit.

TALIESIN: I don't sup--

MATT: 17 hits?

TALIESIN: I don't suppose a natural one does anything to that gun, does it?

MATT: You want me to do something to your hammer?

TALIESIN: No, I mean like-- Because guns have a thing where sometimes things happen on natural ones.

MATT: For the--

TALIESIN: All right, I was just throwing it out there.

MATT: No, I know what gun that is. Fair enough. They've lost their big gun already. So that was a big natural one. That's going to be--

TALIESIN: A little PTSD from that game.

MATT: Nine points of piercing damage to you. He's going to-- I need you to make a strength saving throw for me as he's using one of his tripping attack abilities.

LAURA: Me?

MATT: Yeah. He's shooting your leg out from under you.

LIAM: Feels like nothing goes wrong.

TALIESIN: Mm-hmm.

LAURA: Seven.

MATT: Seven? You are knocked prone.

TALIESIN: It means you're harder to hit.

TRAVIS: Are you taking a nap? This is no time to nap!

MATT: He's going to go, "Fuck, fuck, fuck! Bad idea. Wrong people! Chose the wrong people! Turning it around." The other guy who's there with his gun, seeing his friend got fried and is on the ground, his skin burning going, "Ah," from the lightning bolt. Is like, "Shit." He's going to go over and start smacking the side of the machine. It's like, (metallic impacts). Some of the charged energy devices underneath it start glowing. It's like, (impacts). You see its legs starting to readjust its current positioning. That's going to finish his turn. The guy who slapped the side of it who is wearing the furred cloak is going to, looking down at everybody, put his hands up in front of him. As he begins to turn his hand in this spherical formation, this small sphere of--

MARISHA: (whispers) Counterspell!

MATT: -- greenish pale energy begins to form.

LAURA: Uh-oh.

MATT: That drips through the spaces before he unleashes it down.

SAM: Ooh, cool.

MATT: It glides downward before exploding outward like that.

TRAVIS: Oh hell.

SAM: Oh no.

MARISHA: Wait, are you downed? Why are you down?

LAURA: I'm prone.

LIAM: She's sleeping.

MARISHA: Oh, you're sleeping.

SAM: Are you-- how many-- Are you almost dead? You're almost dead.

TRAVIS: Which means it's advantage against you, right, it's not a crit.

LAURA: Oh yeah.

TRAVIS: Melee spell.

LAURA: Oh yeah, this is going to do me.

SAM: It's going to do me, too.

MATT: So I need-- This is a 20-foot radius sphere.

TRAVIS: Did I say fuck you?

MATT: (laughs) Which is going to be--

LAURA: Eww.

MATT: Yeah, I can get all of you.

LAURA: Maybe it's just a Slow spell. Maybe it's just Slow.

MATT: So I need Ashton, FCG, Imogen, Fearne, and Birdie to make a dexterity saving throw.

TALIESIN: All right.

MATT: Those inside the vehicle--

LAURA: At disadvantage, because I'm on the ground?

MATT: Correct, and you do your plus two to yours because you're inside the vehicle.

LAURA: Oh no.

TALIESIN: Don't suppose that guy was 15 feet away from me.

MATT: You have advantage against spells, anyway, just being a natural--

ASHLEY: That's right.

SAM: Four over here.

MATT: Four over there? That's a failure.

SAM: Yeah.

MATT: I'm going to do...

TALIESIN: Goddamn it.

SAM: Oh boy.

MATT: Okay, so that's 21 points of acid damage.

LAURA: (gasps)

SAM: I'm down.

MARISHA: Oh! Oh no. Oh, you're our healer.

MATT: It's still burning. (sizzles)

TALIESIN: Holy shit.

SAM, MARISHA, MATT: It's acid.

LIAM: So it's every round.

TALIESIN: Every round.

SAM: Oh, I'm not immune to that. (laughter)

TRAVIS: You're immune to that?

SAM: No, I'm not.

TRAVIS: Oh, okay.

SAM: I'm immune to--

MATT: Birdie takes 21.

TALIESIN: Oh shit.

LAURA: Uh-oh.

TRAVIS: Uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh.

ASHLEY: Holy smokes.

TALIESIN: We're going to have to fix that real quick.

TRAVIS: Uh-oh.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Birdie gets splashed, "Aah!" and looks back over the shoulder. The goggles are starting to melt a little bit. "Fearne, I'm not feeling good."

LAURA: Oh no!

SAM: Oh god.

MARISHA: Is it poisoned?

SAM: Wait, as in dead?

LAURA: Acid.

MATT: This is acid.

LAURA: We're acid-ed.

MATT: This is a Vitriolic Sphere. What did you roll?

SAM: Oh boy, this just got bad real quick.

ASHLEY: What did I-- 21.

MATT: 21, yeah, so you take only 10 points of acid damage. You do not take additional damage going forward.

SAM: You're microdosing the acid.

LAURA: That's great, that's great. (laughter)

MATT: Laudna?

LAURA: Imogen.

MATT: Sorry, Imogen. What the fuck? See, now you're making me do it. Now you're in my head! Now you're in my head.

LIAM: Sorry, it's dangerous right now. So we're all a little--

SAM: It's fine. Brennan, it's fine. Just keep going. (laughter)

MATT: Touché.

MARISHA: Acid.

MATT: Sorry, what'd you roll? Natural one? Okay, 21 points of acid damage.

LAURA: I'm...

MATT: Laudna is unconscious. Imogen. I'm going to keep saying it.

LIAM: Holy shit.

MARISHA: You're unconscious, too?

MATT: You're unconscious.

ASHLEY: Oh no.

MATT: And still burning.

TALIESIN: We're going to have to get to FCG fast.

MARISHA: -- death spiral territory.

MATT: All right. And Ashton?

TALIESIN: I rolled 19.

MATT: 19, okay. So you take 10 points of acid damage. All right, and as he's releasing the sphere, he ducks down low to take full cover behind the wall there.

TRAVIS: Oh boy. Oh boy. Oh boy.

LAURA: Does that still--

SAM: I don't know.

LAURA: I don't know if that counts.

MATT: That brings us now to Birdie's turn. Birdie's going to pull the vehicle forward.

MARISHA: Birdie's got healing magic.

SAM: Don't run me over! Jesus!

MATT: No. (laughter)

TRAVIS: What the fuck?

LIAM: Did you feel that? (laughter)

SAM: (as Birdie) "I should back up to make sure it's okay. Oh god."

LIAM: Oh man.

MATT: Going to attempt to cast Charm Person on the one that just cast the Vitriolic Sphere. So she's there, goggles like-- "Come on! Give us a hand." He's going to make his saving throw. And fails with a two.

LAURA: (whoops) (claps)

SAM: Okay, okay.

LAURA: Save us, save us. Magic guy!

MATT: So he is charmed.

LAURA: Maybe?

MATT: Mark him over here. Okay, Fearne, you're up, with FCG on deck.

ASHLEY: Okay. Is there a cliff behind them?

MATT: Behind them? No, that's behind you guys.

ASHLEY: That's behind us. Okay, never mind. Okay, I'm going to jump off.

MATT: Which way?

ASHLEY: To your right. Towards FCG, perfect.

MARISHA: And kick him!

ASHLEY: I'm going to spit in his face.

SAM: (laughs) Oh jesus. (laughter) Spit in my mouth.

TRAVIS: Just do the stomp out. (laughter)

ASHLEY: Okay. I will-- (whines) Oh god, okay.

SAM: You're going to steal from me, aren't you?

ASHLEY: Yeah. I'm trying to see if I can do two things.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

SAM: Twin Spell.

ASHLEY: Okay, I am going to cast Cure Wounds--

SAM: Aww!

ASHLEY: -- at 2nd-level on FCG.

LAURA, SAM: Aww!

ASHLEY: Calm down, everybody. (laughter)

MARISHA: It's the sweetest thing Fearne has ever done. (laughter)

ASHLEY: There's an eight.

LIAM: She's standing there, gut shot.

TRAVIS: (laughs) Yeah, yeah.

LIAM: (as Fearne) "Everybody, just calm down."

ASHLEY: 13.

SAM: Amazing!

LAURA: That's great.

ASHLEY: Okay.

TRAVIS: Way to go, Fearne.

SAM: Amazing.

ASHLEY: Then--

TRAVIS: Tell Fearne, "Here's how an angel gets its wings."

MARISHA: There are three angels.

ASHLEY: Give me two seconds. Let me see if I can-- I think that's all I can do, actually.

MATT: Okay.

ASHLEY: Yeah, I think I'll--

MATT: That's your turn?

ASHLEY: That's my turn.

MATT: Okay, finishing Fearne's go, that brings us to FCG who is now on the ground, but conscious again.

LAURA: (whooping)

MARISHA: That's good.

SAM: Oh, Fearne, thank you. I will use half of my movement to get up on a wheel. Seeing my friend Laudna on the ground. (laughter)

MATT: Goddamn it.

SAM: I'm going to roll over to her. (laughter) I will also Cure Wounds her. Wait, do I have--

LAURA: Do you have that prepared?

SAM: I don't think I do. Wait, that can't be right (laughs). I'm a cleric.

LAURA: You're a healer without a Cure Wounds prepared?

SAM: I have Healing Word.

LAURA: What?

SAM: I always have something. I'll do Healing Word, I guess, on her instead.

LAURA: Thanks.

SAM: At 2nd-level. So yeah, that's 2d4 plus three. Four. Four!

LAURA, ASHLEY: Ooh.

SAM: That's 11.

LAURA: Yay.

SAM: But that's just a bonus action, right?

MATT: Correct.

SAM: Okay.

LAURA: (whooping)

SAM: Okay, so she's up?

LAURA: I'm up.

MARISHA: Oh, oh, Hondir.

SAM: Hondir's out. I was going to-- Hmm, okay, okay, okay. And hey, Matt.

MATT: Yeah?

SAM: I had absorbed five points of damage prior.

MATT: Mm-hmm.

SAM: Am I still going to take that unless I use it?

MATT: Well, you would've lost it now from the sphere that dumped acid on you.

SAM: So it just goes away?

MATT: Well, it buffers the damage you would've taken.

SAM: Oh, it buffers the damage.

MATT: Well, it's temporary hit points. Oh, I'm sorry, no.

SAM: It does state--

MATT: No, so what you do is you get temporary hit points. Then the next time you take damage, it takes it off the temporary hit points first.

SAM: Wait, what? But also, if I don't spend it, I get--

MATT: You take damage. So if it goes away from taking damage, then you don't have to worry about it.

SAM: Oh!

MATT: So the benefits are either you do damage and pump it into an attack, or you use it as a shield and it goes away and it's fine. But if neither happens, that's when the feedback hits you.

SAM: Cool, cool, I love it.

LAURA: Oh cool.

MATT: So there you go.

SAM: I had no idea. All right, well then, as my action, I guess I'll scoot over-- Or wait, I already used my movement probably to get up.

MATT: You have 10 more feet you can move.

SAM: I'll scoot towards Hondir.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: Can I hot swap out for my bolt thrower?

LIAM: Hot swap.

SAM: And use it? Or is that way too much?

MATT: That's too much to do in this turn. Because you have action. Bonus action you've already used.

SAM: Okay, I will--

MATT: All your movement, so.

SAM: Then I'll use my action to keep moving towards Hondir.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: Yeah.

MATT: Oh, no, that's right. You still have your action available. So you can just hot swap it if you wanted to.

SAM: And fire it?

MATT: It's like changing a weapon. You did get it upgraded, so I'd say sure.

SAM: Okay, I will fire then.

MATT: Where?

SAM: At Merry Christmas.

MATT: Okay, roll to attack.

SAM: All right. Oh, it's only a 10.

MATT: That misses entirely. My apologies. Arcs off the metal.

SAM: Great, that's it.

MATT: Okay, at the end of your turn, you take--

SAM: Oh, I'm still covered in acid!

LAURA: How do you get acid off of you?

SAM: Maybe I'll lick it off with my tongue.

MATT: Oh my god!

LAURA: No!

ASHLEY: No.

MATT: I rolled so many fours. That was ridiculous. You take 17 points of acid damage.

MARISHA: Are you back down?

SAM: I'm down again. (laughter)

ASHLEY: Oh my god.

TALIESIN: How do you get acid off, actually, now that you mention it?

SAM: Well, should've licked it off.

MATT: But it has run its course. The acid has finished burning.

ASHLEY: Baking soda, I need baking soda.

MATT: Roll over. (sizzling) Just face down. (laughter) Like passed out R2D2 on the dirt, just (plonk). All right. Finishing your go, it is now Birdie-- No, I'm sorry. This would be the Barge Crawlers who are over here and over here. They're both going to--

LAURA: That's it? It just has to run its course?

LIAM: Couple of us, more than one.

MATT: Yeah, they're both going to take a shot.

LIAM: But you're conscious.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MATT: One's going to be at you, because you're hanging off the side.

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: That's going to be a 17 to hit.

LIAM: Can I do an acrobatics again, or is it just strength save?

MATT: This person's trying to shoot you.

LIAM: Oh, shoot me. What was it?

MATT: 17?

LIAM: No. Shield goes (plink).

MATT: Off the side, great. The person over here is going to take a shot at you, Chetney.

TRAVIS: Okay.

MATT: Ooh, that's going to be a 24 to hit.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MATT: You take 11 points of piercing damage right in the back of the shoulder blade, lodges itself an inch into you.

TRAVIS: All right, dick hole.

MATT: Then both of them are going to leap down and run. Get that far. That's about there.

MARISHA: Oh wait, where did he just go? Did he just jump behind?

MATT: He jumped off the other side there. Okay, finishing their go, Laudna, you're up.

MARISHA: Well--

MATT: The actual Laudna.

MARISHA: Yes, you can call me Imogen.

TALIESIN: You've had, like, three turns.

MARISHA: It's fine.

TALIESIN: I just-- fuck it. (laughter) This is bullshit. (laughter)

MARISHA: Okay, I can't see those guys anymore. DM question.

MATT: Yes?

MARISHA: Prestidigitation says that I can clean--

SAM: Clean soiled stuff.

MARISHA: Or yeah. Could I clean away acid?

TRAVIS: The acid ran its course, so it's done.

MARISHA: Oh, did it?

MATT: No, there's another. The other people still have burning acid. On him, it's done, yeah.

MARISHA: Who? Oh.

TRAVIS: Fucking Birdie, but who gives a shit.

LAURA: Birdie and Imogen.

ASHLEY: (gasps)

MATT: I will say it is magical acid from a 4th-level spell.

MARISHA: That's what I was curious about.

MATT: A cantrip probably would not be able to dissolve it, unfortunately.

MARISHA: Cool. Going off of what Travis was saying, a bullet grazed Laudna's face. So, my mouth is torn open and you can see exposed teeth and gum. I just feel that and I grab into it with my fingers, and I rip even further.

SAM: Ew!

MARISHA: And start dislocating my jaw as I take on my Form of Dread.

MATT: That's some Beetlejuice shit.

ASHLEY: That is so cool.

MATT: I love it.

MARISHA: Ooh! Get 12 temporary hit points.

SAM: Oh nice.

ASHLEY: Nice.

MARISHA: Which is good. Then I'm going take the sinew and ichor dripping from my mouth and do an Eldritch Blast to Merry Christmas.

MATT: Okay.

ASHLEY: Woo!

TRAVIS: What the fuck?

MARISHA: Two Eldritch Blasts.

MATT: He has three quarters cover because he is now ducked low behind the wall.

MARISHA: ♪ Spell Sniper ♪

MATT: That's true.

ASHLEY: Oh yes!

MARISHA: A 16 and a 14 for 22 and-- Wait, right? Yes, 22 and 24.

MATT: Both hit.

MARISHA: Yes.

MATT: Spell Sniper, man.

ASHLEY: ♪ Spell Sniper ♪

MARISHA: ♪ You'll get caught up in the ♪

TRAVIS: ♪ Spell Sniper ♪

MATT: That would've normally given him a plus five to his AC, but--

MARISHA: Oh yeah. Cool. That is 14 damage for the first one, and 10 damage for the second.

MATT: Gotcha. Cool. So one hits off the side of his shoulder. He's like, "Shit," and goes to hunker down. One blasts him across his shiny chrome dome that's now dripping with sweat, darkened from the blasted lightning bolt earlier. As it hits, he's like, "Ah," and pulls below and you see him stand up a little bit and look at his hands. He's bleeding from where it impacted on his head.

SAM: Nice, nice, nice.

MATT: Well done.

TRAVIS: That's Merry Christmas?

ASHLEY: Nice.

MATT: Yep.

MARISHA: Okay.

TRAVIS: Maricris.

MARISHA: Am I able to move in between the crawler and this wall? Or even duck under behind the cart to get a little bit more cover?

MATT: I'll move you there. Sure, you can do that.

MARISHA: Okay.

MATT: Take half cover there.

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: You got it. Okay. Does that finish your turn?

MARISHA: Yes.

MATT: Okay, it is now the Ruin-Crawler's turn.

LIAM: Oh, the vehicle itself.

MATT: It's an automaton.

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: It's a manned vehicle, but it also has its own turn.

LIAM: Sweet!

SAM: Oh, shit.

MATT: So for its bonus action, it's going to gear shift. You watch as its legs, you didn't notice it before, but where the joints are in its large spider-like legs--

SAM: It's a Transformer.

MATT: -- there are wheels embedded inside.

TRAVIS: Damn.

MATT: Suddenly they (legs expand), and open up. The legs bend upward into an upper position to land on the wheels. The downside is that bomb fucked up the front one. I'll roll to see. I'll say if it's a 16 or higher on this dice, that wheel is still functional.

LAURA: Okay.

TRAVIS: Okay.

MATT: If it's a 15 or lower, that wheel is fucked from the explosion, and it's going to be dragging ass if it tries to move. It can do it, but it's going to be hindered. That's a 17. (groaning)

ASHLEY: Aw, no.

MATT: It's a good try. It's a good try.

LAURA: (laughs)

MATT: So it grinds onto the ground and slams. It looks like where the explosion, most of it was impacted. The actual joint portion of it is still fucked. It stumbles off and gets left behind. So now it's missing half a leg. It can't really go into its other form now, but it does manage to sit on its wheels. With that, it's going to take a 50 feet movement.

SAM: I see the wheels.

ASHLEY: Whoa, 50 feet.

SAM: Wait, it's retreating?

MATT: It's retreating. It's getting over here.

LAURA: ♪ They're trying to run away. ♪ ♪ But want to steal it. ♪

MATT: With you still hanging from it.

TALIESIN: I'll take an attack of opportunity if I have one.

MATT: Go for it. You can take it.

LIAM: On that fucked up wheel.

TALIESIN: Yeah, on the fucked up wheel.

MARISHA: Would you get one, too?

TRAVIS: I don't know.

MATT: You can, yeah. If you want to.

TRAVIS: Fuck yeah.

TALIESIN: 21.

MATT: 21 hits.

TALIESIN: All right. Let's just hurt this thing a little bit. I have a question about Orbital Decay. Six.

SAM: You have a question about Orbital Decay?

ASHLEY: Orbital Decay?

LAURA: Orbital Decay.

TALIESIN: 14 points of damage.

MATT: 14 points of damage.

TALIESIN: Would the Orbital Decay, if I used it on that machine, would it get pulled? Would I eat 15 feet worth of its movement? Out of curiosity.

MATT: That happens at the start of its turn.

TALIESIN: All right. Never mind.

MATT: It pulls you in. So, yeah, it doesn't slow them.

TALIESIN: Yeah. That was all good.

TRAVIS: 25 to hit.

MATT: That does hit. Go ahead and roll damage.

TRAVIS: Nine points of slashing damage.

MATT: Nine points of slashing damage. Nice. MARISHA and LAURA: (weak slashing) So as you both impact it, you can see parts of it are-- It's starting to show some wear and tear.

TRAVIS: Fucking metal.

MATT: It's cruising on the wheels now, leaving grooves in the ground as parts of its jagged metal are tearing into the rock and stone beneath it. But it's start to cruise to retreat. That's what it's going to do. All right, finishing that go. Top, Orym, you're still hanging from it as he's starting to move away from your friends.

LIAM: As a bonus action, as he feels the whole thing start to shutter and jive, he goes: Ah, shit. And uses his shield arm to wipe blood out of his hair and face. I will do Second Wind.

MATT: Mm-hmm.

LIAM: And give myself--

TRAVIS: Nice. Fighter shit.

LIAM: Seven plus six is 13.

SAM: Fighter.

TRAVIS: ♪ Fighter shit ♪

ASHLEY: ♪ Fighter shit ♪

LIAM: Then every muscle in his little sinewy halfling arm flexes and he swings and lands on Maricris' shoulders.

MATT: Okay. So leaping onto the second floor here.

LIAM: Yep. My blade goes down across his face.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: That is a 16.

MATT: 16 misses.

LIAM: I slash again.

LAURA: Maricris was on the first level.

MATT: Yeah, right there.

LIAM: Yeah.

LAURA: Got it.

LIAM: They both miss then.

MATT: You go to swing both, and he's like, "(groans)" starts wrestling you off the shoulders, and you're unable to quite hit him as he-- You go to strike downward and he leans forward, and you end up hitting the metal wall they've been using to guard them. You pull back again a second time and swing, and he lifts you up, and you end up accidentally striking the upper platform. You can't quite sink it in.

LIAM: I say: Eh, fuck it. I use the rest of my movement to spring off the whole vehicle and roll into the dust.

MATT: Okay. Make an acrobatics check.

LIAM: That is a 13.

MATT: 13. With the pace that it's moving, I will say that is not good enough. You end up crashing into this dried tree. Breaks your fall. You do take-- So you only take four points of bludgeoning damage from the impact and are knocked prone.

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: However, you are leaving the attack range of both of them, so they both get attacks of opportunity on you.

LIAM: Sure.

SAM: Oh no.

MATT: As does the guy up top.

LIAM: Well, the mage is a friend.

MATT: Actually, no. He didn't know you were there.

LIAM: The mage is charmed, right?

MATT: That's right. The mage is charmed by her.

LIAM: Oh, okay.

MATT: By Birdie.

LIAM: Oh, it's one-on-one. Okay, got it.

MATT: Yeah, it's not like she's friends with everybody. She hasn't been told that you were--

LIAM: Lay it on me.

MATT: -- her friend yet necessarily.

TRAVIS: Dominated is what that is.

MATT: Yeah, dominated is when you get to do shit like that. So they're both going to take attacks of opportunity on you.

LIAM: Yep.

MATT: Main guy, that's a natural 19.

LIAM: Just hits.

MATT: (laughs) Yeah, that's a 26. So he goes and strikes out with his scimitar, quickly reaching out. That hits you for double sixes. I've been angry on you. That is going to be 16 points of slashing damage.

LIAM: Got it. This was no joke.

MATT: While the other one is going to go ahead-- He is not as technically decent. He's going to take a stiletto and stab at you as you go. That's going to miss with an 11.

TRAVIS: You got a shoe?

MATT: Wide. But you impact painfully. The shield took some of the impact. But you feel your hip joint has popped out of socket a little bit. You have to pop it back in. Does that finish your turn?

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: Okay. Finishing that, it is now the gunner's turn, who is angrily "(screams)" furious that his gun's been destroyed. He's going to stand up on top of it, climb onto the mangled mass. The smoke is still pouring out of it. He steps and leans through the smoke. You see his body emerging as he pulls up his rifle. He's heading for you, Ashton.

TALIESIN: Yeah!

MATT: Because you're the one that's immediately in his view from that point. Since you did attack recklessly last time, he's going to take a shot at you with advantage.

TALIESIN: Yeah, with disadvantage.

MATT: Well no, you lost that--

TALIESIN: With advantage.

MATT: Well, you also have your gravity up too, right?

TALIESIN: I do, so it wouldn't matter anyway.

MATT: So yeah. So advantage on that. That's going to be a 19 to hit.

TALIESIN: That hits.

MATT: Sorry, 17 to hit.

TALIESIN: That still hits.

MATT: Still hits, okay. So you take...

SAM: We're getting wrecked.

LIAM: Yeah, this was a mess.

MATT: Eight points of piercing damage.

TALIESIN: Reduced to four.

MARISHA: You started it, bitch.

MATT: Reduced to four.

ASHLEY: Took us a bit by surprise.

MATT: I mean, yeah. This is meant to be a possible conversation and negotiation, whatever it may be. I will say the bomb definitely set things up and definitely fucked over some of the possibilities they could've done.

TALIESIN: I take that shot.

MATT: You wrecked one of the Ruin-Crawler's attack abilities directly out of the gate, too. All right, so you take that shot.

TALIESIN: Oh, yeah. Ain't nothin'.

MATT: All right. That's going to bring it to Imogen's go with Ashton on deck.

LAURA: Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm. I'm going to get up onto one knee. I'm going to pull my knife out of my thigh holster and fling towards Maricris with a Catapult attack. I'm going to use a sorcery point to double the distance.

MATT: Double the distance. Yeah, that's definitely in range then.

TRAVIS: Like a Magneto dagger.

MATT: You got it. Okay. So, is that--

LAURA: That's a dex save.

MATT: A dex save? He gets a plus two to it. It's plus five, because it's three quarters cover right now, because he's ducked down below. What's the DC on it?

LAURA: Oh, so he gets a dex bump on-- Oh.

MATT: Because he's behind cover.

LAURA: Oh, I was thinking that would be an AC bump.

MATT: So that still brings him to a 15.

LAURA: It's 15 that he has to beat.

MATT: So, yeah. He does succeed.

MARISHA: Damn.

ASHLEY: Balls.

LAURA: All right.

SAM: And you lose a dagger.

MATT: Is it all or nothing, or does he take half damage?

LAURA: I think it's an all or nothing. When the object strikes something, the object takes 3d8 damage, so.

LIAM: This was humbling.

SAM: Was? It's still going on.

ASHLEY: It's still going on.

TALIESIN: I'm doing all right.

MARISHA: I feel good about this.

SAM: Hondir might be dead forever.

LIAM: They're leaving. They're leaving.

MARISHA: We got to save Hondir.

MATT: All right. So, does that finish your turn, Imogen? Do you want to stay put, or? Still have 15 feet of movement and a bonus action, if you want.

LAURA: I'm going to (laughs). I'm going to use Telekinetic Shove to try to push the guy off the top.

SAM, ASHLEY: Yay.

MARISHA: Come on.

TALIESIN: Good for you.

ASHLEY: Get him.

MARISHA: Make it work.

MATT: Okay. (laughing) That's a seven. (laughing)

MARISHA: Oh!

ASHLEY: Yes!

MATT: So on the rock, (ping). He's like, "Ha ha, you couldn't-- Whoa!" He full-on stumbles over the edge.

LAURA: Oh my god, that's amazing.

MATT: Falling off the side.

LAURA: So I lost my knife, but he dodged it and fell.

MARISHA: You got him out!

TRAVIS: Did you mean Maricris, or the guy up top top?

LAURA: I'll take Maricris.

MATT: There we go. There we go. So, yeah, "(screams)." (thump) Lands on the ground. Takes five points of bludgeoning damage from the impact.

LIAM: Every time Matt makes a sound effect, he sends the little fish rocks blowing and it looks like impact.

ASHLEY: I love it.

MARISHA: It's great.

MATT: It's effective. I like it.

ASHLEY: It is fun.

MATT: So he's now ass end on the ground, prone. About 10 feet from you, going "(grunts)." Five feet. You're both just (groans) on the ground.

LIAM: Sucks, huh? (laughter)

MATT: "Shut up." (laughing) Does that finish your turn, Imogen?

ASHLEY: I guess.

MATT: All right. Chetney, you're up.

SAM: Does she still have--

MATT: Or no, sorry. Ashton.

SAM: -- acid all over her?

TALIESIN: I would know if healing potions work on FCG, right?

LAURA: Matt, I still had acid on me, so--

MATT: Oh, that's right, you do.

LAURA: -- at the end of my turn, I would've taken damage.

MATT: You do. That is...

LAURA: Yeah.

MARISHA: Are you okay? No?

LIAM: This could burn her down again.

MATT: 16 points of acid damage.

SAM: Oh!

LAURA: I'm out.

SAM: Why did we keep doing it? You should've brushed it off or something.

LAURA: I can't brush acid off.

SAM: Why not?

LAURA: I was trying to do shit before I died again.

MATT: (laughs) But the acid effect is now off.

LIAM: That's what they did in Aliens. (laughter)

MARISHA: Yeah, let's just spread it around more.

TRAVIS: Dallas? Brush it off her chest. (laughter)

MATT: She finished shoving him off. A smile comes to your face before you collapse once more to the ground. Okay. Now that brings us to Ashton, with Chetney on deck.

TALIESIN: I'm flipping around, running up to FCG. Pulling out a healing potion bottle.

SAM: Does that work on me?

MATT: Healing potions work on you. It's a magical effect.

TALIESIN: I'm going to unhinge the jaw and throw it in there like a softball.

MATT: The glass shatters on the inside.

ASHLEY: So close. (laughter)

MATT: You are filled with healing potion and glass shards.

SAM: Oh!

TALIESIN: 2d4 plus two, right?

MATT: Yep.

LIAM: Mm, crunchy.

ASHLEY: That's amazing.

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: That's great.

TALIESIN: Nine points of healing.

SAM: Hey!

ASHLEY, MARISHA: Hey!

LIAM: Hey.

ASHLEY: Looky there.

MATT: There we go.

SAM: I'm back up!

TALIESIN: I'm going to take the rest of my movement to turn around and walk up ahead a little bit just to try and be a target.

MATT: Here?

TALIESIN: Yeah, just there. Yeah, that far to see if I can draw fire.

MATT: You got it. Okay. Finishing your go, Chetney, you're up.

TRAVIS: Goddamn it (laughs). I see Ashton do that. I look back at this son of a bitch that shot me in the back.

SAM: Oh, he's still there.

TRAVIS: I'll be like: I see you, fucker! (laughter) Fuck! I'll walk over to Imogen and I'll pour this healing potion in her mouth.

MATT: To?

TRAVIS: Imogen.

MATT: Imogen. Okay, there you go.

ASHLEY: Yes.

TRAVIS: Yeah, fucking five plus whatever.

MATT: Five plus two, so seven.

TRAVIS: Seven. I healed ya!

MATT: She'll find out when she returns.

SAM: She's not very grateful.

MATT: I know.

TRAVIS: Very grateful.

MARISHA: Just silence.

MATT: (laughs)

MARISHA: Wow.

SAM: Your silence is deafening.

TRAVIS: That's fine. (laughter) How much movement?

MATT: That's your go.

TRAVIS: That's all of my movement, too. All right, fine.

MATT: Okay, the Crawler leader is going to stand up on his turn. Seeing that everyone's-- He's very much outnumbered. Sees you on the ground, and he sees the opportunity, and he goes "(panicked noise)." He's going to attempt to leap onto the now racing by vehicle he just fell from as it's just leaving his range.

TRAVIS: Words. Words!

MATT: So he'll leap onto it. Just holding the side of it as his knee is scraping the ground. That's all he's going to do for his turn.

SAM: Okay.

MATT: With that, it's going to come to Birdie. Birdie is going to go ahead and... She's going to cast Sleep.

SAM: Ooh!

MATT: She's going to drive the vehicle forward. Up to there.

TRAVIS: Oh.

MATT: She's going to cast Sleep on the leader. So that's going to be 5d8.

SAM: That's smart. She's smart.

LAURA: Am I dead?

TRAVIS: You're healed seven points.

MATT: 22.

MARISHA: Chet dumped a potion down your throat.

LAURA: You did? Chet.

MATT: Which is enough. So you watch as Maricris, who just got back up, and then leaps onto the side of the crawler as it's just about to coast away, and he goes "(grunts)." Looks back and is about to laugh, cackle as he escapes. Birdie's just there on the back of the crawler, leaning forward and goes, "I don't think so." You watch as he goes, and falls asleep and hits the ground.

SAM: Nice. Nice. She goes, "Told you I'd get him!"

ASHLEY: Good job, Mama! (laughter)

MATT: Onto the ground there.

SAM: Good shooting, Mama.

TRAVIS: Run him over. (laughter)

MATT: She could. (laughs) She's cruising.

TRAVIS: Uh-huh.

MATT: But she's not quite there yet. All right, finishing her go. That brings us to Fearne with FCG.

ASHLEY: Okay, so who's still living? Who is still with us?

TRAVIS: Imogen is up. Well, she's--

TALIESIN: Everybody's up.

LAURA: Is FCG up?

LIAM: FCG's up.

TALIESIN: FCG is up.

ASHLEY: Who's still living of the bad guys?

LAURA: What about Hondir.

LIAM: Hondir is out.

MARISHA: Oh, Hondir.

LIAM: Hondir's unconscious.

SAM: I'll get Hondir.

LAURA: Has he been making saves every turn?

MATT: Mm-hmm, I've been doing it.

LAURA: But we don't know? We don't know?

ASHLEY: Oh, no.

LAURA: Where is his turn, though?

TRAVIS: We don't know.

MATT: He's at the bottom. He's not a combatant.

LAURA: Okay, okay. Okay.

TRAVIS: He is not a combatant.

LIAM: Especially now.

MATT: He is not by any means an adventurer, a warrior, a fighter.

ASHLEY: Is Maricris still up? Or no, he's asleep.

LIAM: He's sleeping on the ground.

MATT: He's asleep.

ASHLEY: He's sleepy, sleepy. If I do anything, he'll wake up.

MATT: Yeah.

LAURA: To him.

MATT: But a melee attack is an auto crit.

ASHLEY: Oh.

TRAVIS: A melee attack.

ASHLEY: A melee attack. Okay.

MARISHA: It's an auto crit, but it will also wake him up.

TRAVIS: He's a long way away.

ASHLEY: Yeah. Okay. You'd have to get over there first. I'm going to do some Scorching Rays on big boy up top.

MATT: Up here?

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MATT: Okay, go for it.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: All three on him, or?

ASHLEY: Mm-hmm.

MARISHA: God, we still have these douche bags.

TALIESIN: They were running last time they went.

LAURA: They were running away.

TALIESIN: They were already peacing out.

MARISHA: Yeah, they're going over to the plunger.

ASHLEY: 17?

MATT: 17 hits him.

ASHLEY: Okay.

TRAVIS: Getting the claymores.

MARISHA: Yeah.

ASHLEY: Natural 16, plus.

MATT: That hits, yeah.

ASHLEY: Okay. 16?

MATT: Yeah.

ASHLEY: All three hit.

MATT: So 6d6 fire damage to the gunner.

ASHLEY: Okay.

LAURA: Oh, shit.

ASHLEY: Ooh!

MARISHA: Come on, fire druid.

ASHLEY: 15.

MARISHA: You're just adding d6s as you go?

LAURA: It's so cute.

MARISHA: Just a little bit of garlic powder.

LAURA: Seasoning.

MARISHA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: A little more nutmeg. A little more nutmeg. A little more nutmeg.

ASHLEY: 19 points of damage.

MATT: 19 points of damage. How do you want to do this? (cheering)

LAURA: Oh my god.

ASHLEY: All right. So I will shoot. As I'm slowly walking towards, I just keep shooting the Scorching Rays--

SAM: Ooh, yeah.

ASHLEY: -- as I'm staring at him.

MATT: Just walking towards him. He's standing there with his rifle over his shoulder and he's reloading it on top of it as it's cruising away. All of a sudden, he glances over towards you, the smoke framing him. He growls as the first one burns. The second hits the side of the thigh. The gun flies out of his grip. He looks back at you for the third one. How do you finish him?

ASHLEY: I would love for him to fall off, and then I can stand over him.

MATT: Okay. (laughter)

ASHLEY: (whoosh) Shoot him in the chest.

MATT: The second one that hits him, he tumbles back, (groans) impacts the ground.

TRAVIS: Wow, what a fall.

MATT: He's there like, something is hurt. As he hits the ground he's like, (groans) and is trying to roll over, clutching into himself. He's barely conscious as you begin to walk up to him as he's now fallen back onto this space.

ASHLEY: I'll walk up and I'll just say: I'm going to take your stuff now.

SAM: Oh, shit.

ASHLEY: (explosion) (laughter, cheering)

LAURA: Nice.

MATT: All righty.

TALIESIN: I'm going to attempt a sleight of hand while she's walking past me. As my reaction. (laughter)

MATT: Yeah. If you want to consider her a combatant against you for this instance, sure.

TALIESIN: Yeah, okay. Just for fun. 22.

MATT: 22 does beat your passive perception.

ASHLEY: Wait, what's happening?

TALIESIN: I pick your pocket.

ASHLEY: You're picking my pocket?

TALIESIN: As you were doing your, I took a little thing.

LIAM: During your "How do you want to do this," you got your pocket picked. (laughter)

TALIESIN: Ignore it. Ignore me. Ignore me. Carry on.

MATT: We'll come to it later.

TALIESIN: We'll come to it later. Sorry.

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: That finishes Fearne's go. FCG, you're up.

SAM: Oh, well then, I'll bonus action heal Hondir if he still has any life in him.

MATT: He's unconscious, but still alive.

SAM: Okay, great.

LAURA: Phew.

SAM: Just 1st-level.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: (laughs) I guess.

SAM: Okay, that's seven points of-- I don't know what I--

MATT: Got you.

SAM: No, it's not. It's only five points.

MATT: Got it.

SAM: I rolled on both.

MATT: That's okay. Okay, cool. That's your bonus action, you still have movement and action and you're still on the ground.

SAM: Are we out of combat?

MATT: I mean, we're getting pretty close, yeah.

SAM: But the guys--

MATT: Are you guys going to let them go?

TRAVIS: Yes.

LAURA: Did you--

TRAVIS: Sorry. I can only answer for myself.

LAURA: Did Birdie still have acid damage at the end of her turn?

MATT: Let me see if Birdie-- No, Birdie did take full damage, you're right, she did.

ASHLEY: Oh, that's right.

SAM: Wait, is she down?

LAURA: So Birdie might be down, just so you're aware before your turn, because--

MATT: You're right. God, I'm rolling ridiculous.

SAM: Oh, this is my paper.

MATT: Jesus Christ!

SAM: Showing it for the camera.

MATT: So many fucking fours. (laughter)

ASHLEY: What's covering it?

MATT: So she goes out and casts Sleep on him. (laughs, thuds)

SAM: Oh no!

MATT: Leans in the controls and (engine revs).

ALL: Oh no! (laughter)

MATT: The Sleep spell ends because she's no longer conscious--

LAURA: The minute she went unconscious--

MARISHA: She runs over his hand.

MATT: He starts waking up, he goes, (breathing heavily). (banging) (laughter) And full-on drives over him.

TRAVIS: Oh my god!

SAM: Is he dead?

MATT: Yeah, she runs over him.

SAM: (shouts)

ASHLEY: Oh my god.

MATT: Then collides into the Ruin-Crawler with the--

LIAM: Since I was close to going, Orym was thinking: I'm going to get my rope and tie him. No, I'm not. (laughter)

SAM: So she's down?

MATT: She's unconscious.

SAM: Oh, I don't have a--

TRAVIS: And driving away in a runaway crawler.

SAM: I just used a spell so I can't do another spell. But I can get up and start--

LAURA: But would you have done it for him? I don't know.

SAM: Well, this is a question. Did that all happen before I just healed Hondir?

MATT: That would've, I'd say technically.

SAM: I mean, I hate to choose one life over another.

ASHLEY: I can do something, too, if we're out of combat.

SAM: All right.

LIAM: Hondir's been down a long time.

ASHLEY: Yeah, Hondir has been down.

SAM: I'll just keep it. I did Hondir and now I'm just getting up with the rest of my action.

MATT: You weren't aware of what was happening on that side as you were going to heal. That's fine.

SAM: Sure. I'll use the rest of my action to move over there.

MATT: Okay. So up there, and move you two, three. Now you see what's happening.

SAM: Oh no.

MATT: All right, that brings us to these guys. He's going to try to move and hop onto this to hitch a ride. This guy's going to attempt to move out of sight and stealth.

SAM: Oh wait, there's more guys?

ALL: Yeah.

LAURA: There're a couple.

LIAM: They're all running for the hills.

MATT: Yeah. Things turn very bad for them very quickly. That's going to bring us to Laudna.

MARISHA: So the only two guys that are left alive are these two lackeys?

MATT: Lackeys, and then there's one guy over here who was the spellcaster.

LAURA: A mage.

LIAM: The charmed mage, although she's down, so--

LAURA: He's not charmed anymore.

LIAM: He's not charming right now.

MATT: Mm-hmm.

MARISHA: And the crawler is still moving away?

TRAVIS: Yes.

MATT: Yes, it is.

MARISHA: Okay, Laudna is going to climb over and start moving towards the crawler.

LIAM: Spider crawl.

MATT: To there?

MARISHA: Towards the crawler. I'm doing a full 30 feet, and I'm going to throw Darkness--

SAM: Yeah, you are.

MARISHA: On the crawler.

LAURA: Yeah!

ASHLEY: Good.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: It's going out of it.

MARISHA: No, I'm casting it. You cast a place on it.

LIAM: It sticks to it like Light?

MARISHA: I'm sticking to it, yeah.

TALIESIN: Oh wow.

LIAM: Oh man, it's going to start slamming into trees. (laughter)

MATT: How long does that last?

MARISHA: Darkness lasts for ♪ Do, do, do, do ♪ (mumbling) Up to 10 minutes, concentration.

MATT: Okay, got it.

TALIESIN: (laughs)

TRAVIS: Oh no.

MATT: All right, does that finish your turn?

TRAVIS: That's a long time.

MARISHA: Yeah. Actually, you know what? Then I will also bonus action... Fuck, I should've done that first. Can I quick retcon and do it, say bonus action Hex the guy who's on the--

MATT: That would be casting two spells.

MARISHA: Oh, you're right, you're right. Well, it's a hex, but it's also a concentration spell, so never mind.

MATT: Well, it's also higher than a level... If it's a level one or higher you can't do more than that at one time.

LAURA: You have to do a cantrip.

MARISHA: Right, right, right. Right, right.

MATT: It's all good.

MARISHA: That's my turn.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: That's fine.

MATT: It is now the Ruin-Crawler's turn, which activates on its own turn and just keeps going in the direction that it's going. As you all realize now that it's going full bore, full move and action, traveling on wheeled speed, it's moving 100 feet per round.

LAURA: Oh gosh.

MATT: And you cannot catch up to it. It's damaged but still moving pretty quick on its wheels because it's driving, though it is wrecked from the explosion of the bomb and such. You all sit there and take a moment to breathe as you watch it just keep going and keep going as it's just this sphere of darkness around it. It's just not changing direction.

LAURA: Uh-oh.

MATT: And not changing direction. (nervous oohing) And not changing direction. And not changing direction. Not changing direction. Then we'll say about three minutes pass before you hear (explosion). (laughter)

TALIESIN: Excellent shot.

LAURA: It just went off a cliff.

TALIESIN: Excellent shot.

MATT: It went off the other side of the mesa.

TALIESIN: Excellent, excellent shot.

LAURA: Oh no! (laughter) Oh my god.

MARISHA: You know, I thought maybe it would run into something so we could still take it, or.

LAURA: Oh my... We could've just gone that straight from the get-go and saved all our-- (laughs)

TALIESIN: Clearly, we're going to stabilize Birdie really quickly.

MARISHA: There was never a good opportunity. It was tough--

SAM: Oh my god.

ASHLEY: I'm going to run over to Birdie.

LAURA: That went really well.

ASHLEY: And I'm going to cast Cure Wounds.

TRAVIS: Imogen, get up.

LAURA: Oh.

TALIESIN: I should've saved the Sleight of Hand for now. I'm so sorry. It was like, yeah, that was post.

ASHLEY: Do not be sorry. I didn't hear.

TALIESIN: That was post. Okay.

LIAM: Well, that was great.

MATT: (Birdie) "Is someone making me toast?"

TRAVIS: (laughs) Oh, toast?

MATT: "Oh, hi, Fearne."

ASHLEY: Hi. How you feeling?

MATT: "I'm feeling better, thanks to you. I just (groans)."

ASHLEY: Oh, you know.

MARISHA: Is everyone all right? Imogen, are you good?

LAURA: Huh?

MARISHA: Are you good?

LAURA: I'm great, yeah.

MARISHA: Me, too.

MATT: "That was incredible. I've only just run from those things for the most part. I've never seen them sent... Where'd it go, by the way?"

ASHLEY: Oh...

SAM: Elsewhere.

MATT: You point out as the darkness fades in the distance.

TRAVIS: This little black cloud climbs.

ASHLEY: 15 points of healing for Birdie.

LAURA: Ooh!

MATT: "Thank you, thank you."

LIAM: Do you guys have a hot springs, or bath, or anything at the layaway?

TALIESIN: Oh, that'd be real nice.

MATT: "We got a bath. We can heat it up for you."

TALIESIN: Nice.

MATT: "Yeah, yeah."

LIAM: I have to do so much stretching.

ASHLEY: How's Hondir doing?

SAM: Hondir, how are you?

MATT: "I'm conscious, and I'm appreciative for helping me. Next time, let's just not get involved in those that shoot, please."

LAURA: Yeah, I just didn't want them to take our crawlers, you know?

MATT: "Understood. I'm going to lay down," and just tucks himself into a little corner of the crawler.

TALIESIN: That was an excellent use of the backpack, by the way. Thank you.

LAURA: Oh, yeah.

TALIESIN: Thank you. I'm so glad that we have that off our plate now.

LAURA: Yeah, what if it had gone off on our--

TALIESIN: It would've been bad.

LAURA: -- cart, though?

TALIESIN: Clearly, it would've been a mess.

LAURA: Yeah, oof.

TRAVIS: Looking behind us, are there any more flares in the air? Has anyone come across the bridge behind us? Is it--

MATT: Make a perception check.

TRAVIS: -- drawn any fucking commotion?

ASHLEY: You picked my pocket?

TRAVIS: Guess what? Five.

TALIESIN: I'm going to roll a d20--

MATT: No, looks clear.

TALIESIN: The higher I roll, the better shit I want to get.

SAM: But you know--

TRAVIS: All clear!

SAM: That's a fair point Chetney makes, that--

LAURA: One guy got away.

TALIESIN: 14.

SAM: Well, there's more than just--

TALIESIN: So throw me something--

SAM: I assume there's more than just five people in the Fists of the Ruiner--

LAURA: Just one got away.

SAM: -- so we might be marked by them moving forward.

LAURA: Climbed up on the crawler. So, if we can take care of him, then nobody will know what we did, that it was us, right?

SAM: Well, except the person who passed us on the bridge and signaled to his friends.

LAURA: Oh, right, right, right, right, right.

SAM: So I think we'll probably be marked now by the Fists.

LIAM: Have to assume so, anyway.

SAM: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Eh.

MARISHA: But this is like, you know, that's the fun of Bassuras, right?

TRAVIS: That's like status, right? Yeah.

MARISHA: Yes, exactly.

TRAVIS: We've arrived!

MARISHA: (laughs)

LAURA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Most wanted.

LAURA: Plus, we're protected by Paragon's Call now.

TALIESIN: Which isn't much... I mean, honestly, that's some really good protection.

LAURA: Yeah.

SAM: Sure.

TRAVIS: Not in this fucking case. They didn't give a shit.

TRAVIS, SAM: (laugh)

TALIESIN: Retaliation.

TRAVIS: We threw that name out there and they were like, "Declined!"

LAURA: (laughs)

SAM: Do these fellows that we wiped out, do they have anything on their person?

LAURA: Yeah, we should check everything.

MATT: Okay, yeah. So you take a moment to roll the brigands, what remains of them. Yeah, and you can see on their persons, they have these long streaks. Some of them have one, some have two. One person has a third one that's coming out of there, which is the leader.

TRAVIS: That's new.

MATT: Maricris. But they're just these long red streaks that are tattooed, some of them better quality than others that, for those of you with any sort of religious knowledge, recognize that the iconography of the Ruiner, one of the Betrayer Gods--

LAURA: Oh.

MATT: Symbol is a bleeding eye.

LAURA: Oh shit.

MATT: Is anyone here proficient with history?

LIAM: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Yep.

MATT: Okay. You can roll a history check.

LAURA: (laughs)

LIAM: 23.

MATT: 23.

LAURA: You liar.

MATT: You also know that--

TRAVIS: What?

MATT: -- long ago, Marquet was, front to back, a lush land, but there was an event, specifically during the Calamity, in which the Ruiner attempted to destroy the entire continent, and was thwarted by a heroic sacrifice from destroying all of it, but still turned a third of the continent into harsh wasteland and desert, and that was what created the Rumedam Desert and elements of the Hellcatch Valley.

LIAM: (whispers) Okay.

MATT: So there's still very much some folks who live in these lands that you assume still believe that these parched cracked badlands are still a symbol of strength of the Ruiner's mark left on the world.

LIAM: (winded) I'm going to take a break.

TALIESIN: That'd be nice.

MARISHA: How much time do we have left? I know we were trying to make this a day trip, but I guess we can always spend the night, make it a little overnighter instead.

LIAM: We've got to be back--

SAM: But we have to go back to the--

ASHLEY: Are we close to where--

MATT: "We're not particularly far. Maybe, like, say an hour for--"

LIAM: Can I rest in the wagon?

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: "Yeah, we do that. Get on top. Just get right back up and we'll keep moving." You also find amongst them 420 gold pieces.

SAM: 420.

MARISHA: Nice.

LAURA: Nice.

MATT: (laughs) Jesus.

TRAVIS: I'll hold on to those.

LIAM: No, you won't.

MATT: There are--

TRAVIS: Look twice.

MATT: There's no ammunition, but there are two loose carbine rifles.

LAURA, SAM: Ooh.

MATT: From the Crawler gang.

MARISHA: You could give Mister his gun.

ASHLEY: Oh my goodness.

MATT: This rifle is--

TALIESIN: Even more of a problem.

LAURA: Very big?

MATT: Very big, which is why I'm here for it.

ASHLEY: That's perfect.

MATT, SAM: (laugh)

ASHLEY: Two of those carbine rifles.

TALIESIN: That's probably going to end up bad.

LAURA: Who's holding the cash?

MATT: It's close to six feet, tip to--

ASHLEY: Should we spread it out?

MATT: -- edge.

LAURA: Just spread it out, 420 divided by, one, two--

SAM: Six.

LAURA: Three, four, five, six.

TALIESIN: I'll take it.

LIAM: 70.

TRAVIS: Hey, Siri, what's 420 divided by six?

SAM, LIAM: 70.

TRAVIS: I'm pretty sure it's 70.

LAURA: Well.

MARISHA: 70.

LAURA: Actually, yeah, it's 70.

ASHLEY: Ashton, you stole--

LAURA: You should get some, too.

ASHLEY: -- a porcelain blue thimble--

TALIESIN: Gotcha.

ASHLEY: -- that's for a giant. It's a very big thimble.

TALIESIN: Oh, wow. (laughter)

ASHLEY: It's kind of like a little teacup.

TALIESIN: Okay. Porcelain blue giant thimble.

ASHLEY: He did a lot of cross stitching.

TALIESIN: No judgment.

MATT: Birdie brings the vehicle around, gets everything situated. Everyone's a little worse for wear, but still in one piece. "Well, shall we get going?"

LAURA: Mm-hmm.

SAM: Yes, please.

MATT: "I'll make some food for everyone when we get back, as a thank you. (groans) I need new goggles." You see that acid melted on one side and puts them on, one's a little dinged.

MARISHA: Do a quick little Mending spell on it to try and at least fix the lens.

MATT: It takes a minute, but you do so. You fix it up.

SAM: Oh!

MATT: "Well, thank you. I appreciate that, Laudna. All right, let's get going." (revving) The feet immediately (banging) start tearing forward. With that, both of your tandem skirmish-crawlers begin to pick up back on the initial path, avoiding the brigand encounter by destroying the fuck out of them, but arcing towards a northward direction to your left, heading towards the northern tip of this smaller mesa spire. We'll go and take our break.

TRAVIS, LIAM: Hey.

SAM: Whoa.

MATT: Be back here shortly. But yeah, we'll see where this goes from here as you're about to arrive at the Calloway layaway.

TRAVIS: We could've just left, but no. We killed ourselves and other people.

LAURA: You know you wanted to do it.

TRAVIS: Listen--

TALIESIN: Every second of it I was down for.

LIAM: I ran at it.

TALIESIN: This was great. No regrets.

ASHLEY: No regrets.

TALIESIN: Not a single regret.

SAM: I have one regret.

LIAM: There's a map. There's miniatures.

SAM: I have one regret.

TRAVIS: Here it is.

SAM: I was supposed to say that our battle cam is sponsored by WizKids.

MATT, SAM: (laugh)

SAM: If only I'd've done it.

TRAVIS: They're still at the table.

ASHLEY: We're still at the table.

SAM: What?

ASHLEY, LAURA: Still at the table.

MATT: There's still a battle.

SAM: WizKids, build your own collection and discover more at wizkids.io/crminis or at your local game store.

MATT: There you go. You did it.

LAURA: Yay.

MATT: Good for you. (clapping) All righty, we'll see you guys here in a few minutes.

Part II
MATT: And welcome back. (laughter) So.

MARISHA: Kyle was the only one who got it!

TRAVIS: That was all the energy we needed.

MATT: That was the perfect reentry. (laughter) I love our crew.

LIAM: Same.

MATT: So. As you all follow the path of Birdie Calloway northward on this mesa peak.

LIAM: With pride.

MATT: With pride. A bit bruised, a bit battered from the encounter with the Fists of the Ruiner brigand troop that had been hiding away and waiting for someone like you to come across that bridge to stake their claim and rob you of your goods, but you sent them packing, many of them six feet beneath packed. (laughs) But they weren't too much of a hassle, and you left their crawler destroyed somewhere in the ravine below. But following Birdie, you head northward to another cliff edge. Another bit of nervousness clicks in as you once more cannot see where the road continues as she pushes closer and closer, until eventually she slows down a bit and looks over and goes, "Don't worry, I'm not going to lead you off the side or anything," and gets the crawler to curl up past these clusters of bushes at the edge and slowly goes over into a small switchback curved path that leads down into the rock cliff side, about 15 feet down below. As she curves around, and as you follow suit behind her, making sure to be a little careful, as there is no guardrail, it is about three feet from the edge of your crawler to the edge of the cliff side, plummeting into oblivion. So you slowly trudge around, and then come down to where it comes to a platform, a about 15- by 20-foot platform that is somewhat underneath where the cliff overhangs and comes to an end, so it's shaded space where she pulls the crawler up to the side and stops it. The legs come to rest and dig their metallic nails into the dirt and stop and lower themselves slightly, the wheel leaning slightly against the rock edge, and there you can see there is a cave opening that descends into the base of this mesa rock.

LIAM: Can I ask a logistics question?

MATT: Yes, you may.

LIAM: I think Birdie said it was about an hour to get here, so if Orym was laid up in the wagon, can I call that a short rest for him?

MATT: Sure, I'll allow it.

LIAM: Thank you.

MATT: If anybody else who is not driving would like to take a short rest on this path as well, you can do so.

ASHLEY: Sure.

TRAVIS: Yeah, who gives a shit?

MARISHA: Yeah. I'll do it.

SAM: There's too many people to be on the crawlers, I think, if I get on, too.

MATT: I mean, you can ride behind like you were before.

SAM: And get a rest?

MATT: Yeah, you wouldn't. You'd be considered driving, so you don't get a rest, unfortunately.

SAM: All right.

MATT: But as you step off your vehicles and have them clustered there underneath the shade, consuming most of the space here, you can see the archway that leads into the shaded interior of the mountain rock. As you step inside into this hallway tunnel that leads within, you can already see clusters of numerous rain barrels that are set on the side that are towards the edge of the platform that collect the monsoon rains that do come through. Within the inside of this tunnel, you already get the sense that this is an old, maybe long abandoned safe house, or maybe once a small brigand lair. There are braces against the stone, wooden platforms, generally outfitted to keep things from collapsing. May have been some early mining attempts here, possibly. that have been retrofitted since, But you can see already there are signs of work. There are metal hooks on the walls where broken lanterns are hanging from. So this was not crafted more than it was reclaimed by the Calloways. Within about a 15-foot walk, the hallway opens into a living room, a living chamber within this space. It is a cluttered workshop filled with slightly broken furniture, ragged carpets, scavenged storage crates, and uneven shelving bolted into the sides of the rock wall. It is a mess in a quaint, if scattered, way. There are all manner of weird knickknacks squeezed into different spots resting on small tables or jammed into one side of the shelf, but about to slide off the side, and it makes you a little anxious. Some of you want to go over and right it before something shatters. All of the decor is also mingled with these three large patches of stretching, vibrant greenery. There are heavy clusters of twisting, hanging vines that pour down the sides of the rock walls. You can see there are potted trees that have overgrown the pots and have risen up with their boughs and the leaves and branches reaching out into the stone. There's no sunlight in this chamber, but they're all growing lusciously within this room.

LAURA: That's a good word.

MATT: Thank you. You can see there are colorful patches of flowers that are dotting up in spaces between the cushions of some of these rickety, scavenged wicker chairs and seats. It is this tiny little vibrant garden in the middle of shadow. ASHLEY Oh, lovely. But there are a handful of light sources. You can see where the green is centered around each of these, there are, hung from the ceiling from long strings of rope and wrapped around a small net that carries them, a handful of these small, purplish stones, rough-hewn, that give off a faint glow, and all the greenery seems to be growing towards it. It's almost like all the flowers and all the trees and the elements are reaching towards the light, and you get the sense that this is what's giving the life force to the interior of the space to allow them. At this point, Birdie's taking her helmet off, her goggles, and setting some stuff down, takes her bag that she had gotten from Imahara Joe's and sets it over by a far door that is currently closed off. "Well, welcome home, everyone. We tried to turn it into a little chunk of home best we could, and, you know, we didn't know how long we'd stay, so we'd just do a little bit day to day, and it's kind of, I don't know, it has a nice, homey space, I think."

ASHLEY: It's wonderful.

MARISHA: It's amazing.

ASHLEY: Oh my goodness, this is just a dream.

MARISHA: You've really done amazing things for this little hut. So good.

MATT: "Oh, well."

MARISHA: I can actually probably help you fix that shelf, if you want, later, or if you know any other type of--

MATT: "No, I like it just how it is. Everything is, you know, placed meticulously."

MARISHA: Sure. Yes, yes.

TRAVIS: Does the crawler leave tracks to this place? Or did we do a good job of...

LAURA: Oh.

ASHLEY: Oh, good call.

LAURA: Good idea.

TRAVIS: Dusting the sands and rocks so there's not a bunch of big-ass feet leading right to the entrance of the mesa cave.

MATT: "I could probably go back and do that here in a little bit and just make sure we're clear."

TRAVIS: Oh, okay.

MATT: "Yeah, yeah, okay. I can handle that. Well, here. Feel free to take a load off. Is there anything I can get you? Any snacks? Some water? I got some wine?"

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MATT: "I could pop open a bottle."

TRAVIS: To both.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MARISHA: Amazing. That's great. All of it.

MATT: "Okay, okay. I'll start getting some things situated."

LIAM: Is there company here?

MATT: "Oh, I imagine so. Do you want to relax for a minute, or do you want to meet my partner?"

LAURA: Are they going to be-- Is Ira here?

MATT: "I don't know. He was when I left, but he could be off on his own business."

MARISHA: This is going to be so awkward.

ASHLEY: This is going to be a bit awkward.

LAURA: Can he just wander up in here, or is he going to stay away?

MATT: "Ira?"

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: "I mean--"

LAURA: I don't know if y'all have a separate laboratory area or something.

MATT: "Oh, well, that's further in." She points back to one of the two sealed doors in the back of the chamber. She's like, "That's the laboratory, and that's where the individual rooms are and such, but yeah, I mean--"

LIAM: You break bread with Ira?

MATT: "Well, yeah, we've been working together quite closely for a bit here. Look, I-- (sighs) Strange bedfellows. I don't think he's the greatest individual we've encountered. I certainly don't think he's, you know, looking to destroy everything around us. He's got his problems, he's got his issues, but--"

ASHLEY: We all do.

MATT: "For the time being, we're working towards a common goal, and once we achieve that goal, we can go our separate ways."

LAURA: Did you know that Ira had met Fearne? Did he mention it?

MATT: "He mentioned he encountered someone who reminded him of us. I mean, I couldn't imagine it was you. I figured you were still back with Morri and everything. It caught me a little strange in the side, you're not wrong, but, you know, putting two and two together, since you reached out, you know."

ASHLEY: Is Ollie here?

MATT: "I'm pretty sure if they're not sleeping, they're working back in, you know, the laboratory or whatever you call it. I don't think we have an official name for it, but."

ASHLEY: Okay, well.

SAM: I mean, don't you want to go see him?

ASHLEY: Yeah, I don't need to rest, I can--

MATT: "All right. Well, come on, come on."

ASHLEY: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Wait a minute. What's the deal with these purple rocks?

MATT: "Oh, see, I'm normally quite the green thumb, at least back home, but after months of trying to keep anything alive down here, and not really much of a showing for light in this space, Ira was nice enough to fix this up to help keep the place lively."

TRAVIS: Fixed you up with purple, glowing, life-giving rocks?

MATT: These are very familiar rocks to you.

MARISHA: Oh, so it's going to-- Yeah.

TRAVIS: Like the kind that dissolved and forced a rift?

LAURA: Mm-hmm.

MARISHA: I did promise you a new rock.

TRAVIS: Got you a light fixture.

ASHLEY: Oh.

LAURA: Mm-hmm.

TRAVIS: Well, they're very pretty. Can we feel, if you hold your hand in their direction, is there a heat or anything that comes from them?

MATT: Do you put your hand towards them?

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MATT: Okay. You put your hands towards it. She goes, "Ah, ah. I wouldn't do that. They're here for the plants, but Ira warned us, they have a, you know, immediate proximity issue."

TRAVIS: Oh. So physical contact out. Too close, also bad.

MATT: "That's what he said, yeah."

SAM: Bad in what way?

MATT: "He just said it wasn't healthy."

SAM: Hm.

TRAVIS: Well, shit. Now I really want to fucking touch it.

TALIESIN: I really want to touch it really bad now.

TRAVIS: We're really bad about that. A little reverse psychology goes a long way. Anyway, we won't touch.

MATT: "I mean, look, I ain't going to stop you, nor am I going to judge you. I've wanted to touch them a number of times, but Ollie just slaps my hand and tells me not to."

MARISHA: What if you have touched it, theoretically? What would happen?

LIAM: Yeah, is that an ongoing issue?

MATT: "No. For the most part, I just sit around and take care of the plants and help where I can help back in the laboratory."

LAURA: We can ask Ira about it.

TRAVIS: Does Ira handle the purple stones at all, with touch?

MATT: "Yeah, he's the one that brought them here."

TRAVIS: Oh, fuck. Oh fuck.

ASHLEY: Oh, he can--

TRAVIS: Oh fuck.

ASHLEY: -- handle the balls.

TRAVIS: He handles balls.

ASHLEY: I'm sorry. I'm really sorry.

ASHLEY, LAURA: (laugh)

ASHLEY: Me fidgeting.

LAURA: She had a little thing in her hand that's making this (hissing) noise?

TRAVIS: It will kill you.

ASHLEY: All my nerves are just haywire. I'm like, oh my god, it's happening!

LAURA: Do you want to meet your dad? Do you want to see him?

ASHLEY: I would love to.

MATT: "Yeah, come on."

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MATT: "Yeah, anyone who wants to come along. Here we go." She reaches up on the wall and pulls off a keyring and starts leafing through it and goes, "I don't think it's locked, but just in case." She shoves the door. It opens up slightly. "I won't need these." Puts it back on the hook. "Come on this way."

MARISHA: I take note of which key she used.

MATT: Okay. Roll a perception check for me.

MARISHA: 14.

MATT: 14. Okay, yeah. Easy enough. You glance over. There are four keys on the keyring. The one she grabs has a faint, almost a rusted brown coloration to it where some of the others are a little more well kept. At least it appears that way from a quick glance. "Yeah, I think I hear them." You can hear, there's some sounds of things shifting and some low voices conversing, so you do hear people beyond the door. "Looks like they're in. Come on, let's get you to your papa."

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: "Anybody else wants to come along, too."

SAM: We're all going along.

TALIESIN: I wouldn't miss this for anything.

TRAVIS: Actually, I think I'll stay with Birdie and help cover our tracks outside.

SAM: Okay.

TRAVIS: Make sure, you know, pro job. Stakes are raised.

LAURA: You hear in your head as we're walking into the laboratory: Seriously, Chet, don't touch the rocks. I know that's what you want to do.

TRAVIS: That is not true. That is not. You're in my head, right? It's a little true. But I'm not going to touch the rocks. I just don't trust anybody right now.

LAURA: All right. They get in your head.

TRAVIS: I bet I could just touch it real fast.

ASHLEY: I bet you could, too.

LAURA: You could probably just touch it real fast. Don't take the rock.

TRAVIS: Thank you for the permission.

MATT: (laughs)

LIAM: On the way in, Orym sees that Letters is still looking a little sluggish, so he's going to fall in right next to them and stay with them as we walk into whatever this is.

MATT: Okay. Cool. So Birdie holds the door open as y'all pass through, and as you all step through into the hallway, she leaves it ajar and turns back to you and goes, "Well, shall we?"

TRAVIS: Yeah. Do you have any, you know, big, well, there's not a lot of vegetation here. Got any brooms or sheets that we could--

MATT: "I've got a broom."

TRAVIS: Let's get to work.

MATT: "All right." She goes ahead to gather a broom and whatever materials she can find as you all begin to cover your path from where you once came.

TRAVIS: I'm scanning the horizon and keeping half an eye on Birdie.

MATT: Perfect. So beyond this heavily defensible door, about 30 or so feet between a rough-hewn tunnel, it opens up into the heart of the hideaway. A large, high-ceilinged chamber filled in its oblong shape with scrap metal chairs, tools, and tables. A broken beam of sunlight actually peeks through the ceiling. You can see where it seems there is an opening that escapes towards the sky above the mesa carved into the space above, hemmed in dried grass and brush that seems to have gathered and is drooping over and dried from where it sits. In the center of the room, however, you immediately take notice of a climbing, massive, 30-foot tall, telescope-like construct of metal, stone, and all manner of strange cables and runes and dozens of crystalline spheres of varying sizes mounted in numerous places along its impressive size, each casting a dull blue light in its vicinity throughout the otherwise rather shaded chamber. Glancing up towards the beastly apparatus, you see an elven man, shaggy, dark brown hair, suntanned skin, a fair layer of soot smeared and dust placed upon the exterior of his linen outfit and clothes. He has a satchel of tools to one side. He was looking up at it for a second, glances back as he hears footsteps, and looks. "Oh my god."

ASHLEY: Hi.

MATT: "Fearne. Fearne!" And runs up and brings you into this big bear hug, and you can see, he's about a good foot shorter than Fearne, this man of fine fey elven features, a bit sallow in the face, but, you know, a rugged handsomeness to him. His eyes have almost a golden sheen to their coloration, and it pokes through the bit of shaggy hair that's in the middle of his face. But as he just holds you, and he's, you could manhandle him if you really wanted to, although not with your strength, maybe.

ASHLEY: I pick him up. Just the biggest hug.

MATT: "Oh, love, it's been so long."

ASHLEY: I'm so much taller than you.

MATT: "Yeah, it's been some time. You've grown up, that's..."

ASHLEY: I have. I've grown up quite a bit. It's been a very long time since you guys have been gone.

MATT: "You're not wrong. You grew up faster than we expected."

ASHLEY: Well, I think maybe it's been a little longer than you expected. So it seems.

MATT: "Okay, well, either way, I'm proud to see you looking so strong and coming into your own for a young adult, eh? (laughs)"

ASHLEY: I don't know if I would even be considered a young adult anymore, even though I feel like one. I'm 112 now.

MATT: "Oh, that's cute. What?"

ASHLEY: I think we missed a lot of time.

MATT: "Okay. It's been strange. You're not wrong. Well, regardless, we'll talk over it and figure this out, but I'm just happy to see you."

ASHLEY: Oh, I'm so happy to see you, too. This is just so amazing and strange, and what is this?

MATT: "Oh. (nervously laughs) Well, you know..." As you all glance up and he looks, what you notice now up about 15, 20 feet up this massive structure that's maybe about three feet below breaking the hole in the ceiling, what you thought was a part of the machine you now see are some long, bent limbs that clutch it from each side and legs that wrap around it. Out of the corner, you see a familiar, pale face come around with long, pointed fey ears, jet black, glistening eyes, and a big, wicked grin. You can see a heavy set of goggles over the eyes and a dark, leather apron of some kind that's around the body and these long gloves that go past the elbows. (creepily) "Hi, friends." He slowly begins to descend like a spider crawling down his web.

TRAVIS: Urgh!

LAURA: Does he still have his little teeny top hat?

MATT: (laughs)

TALIESIN: Mm-hmm.

ASHLEY: Ting!

MATT: There is no tiny hat on his face at the top.

LIAM: Eyes on Ira, I say to Ollie--

LAURA: Instantly at it again.

ASHLEY: Mm-hmm!

LIAM: Hi, we're Fearne's friends.

MATT: "Oh, right, right."

ASHLEY: Oh, I'm so sorry.

LIAM: Jrusar and beyond, for some of us.

MATT: "My apologies, I'm just a bit taken aback, seeing my daughter. Please, introduce us to your friends."

ASHLEY: Okay, well, this is Orym.

LIAM: With pleasure.

ASHLEY: We've spent a lot of time together traveling all over. And this is Ashton.

TALIESIN: Hey.

MATT: "Ashton, pleasure to meet you."

TALIESIN: Hey.

MATT: "Fantastic."

ASHLEY: This is Imogen.

MATT: "Imogen."

LAURA: Eyes on Nightmare King. Hi.

MATT: "Hey."

ASHLEY: This is FCG.

SAM: Hi there.

ASHLEY: Fresh Cut Grass.

MATT: "Ooh!"

SAM: I'm so happy for you to be reunited.

MATT: "Me, too. You are... Oh, sorry, I just don't often get spoken to by one of your make. That's fantastic."

ASHLEY: This is Laudna.

MATT: "Hi."

MARISHA: Also eyes on Nightmare King. Hello.

ASHLEY: And this is Chetney.

TRAVIS: I'm not here, but I'm in your brain, apparently.

ASHLEY: That's all that's here. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Yeah.

TALIESIN: He turns invisible. He might be there.

TRAVIS: It's been quite a day.

ASHLEY: There's one more of us, and you'll meet him later. He's with Birdie making sure our tracks our gone.

MATT: "Well, if you're all friends of Fearne's, you're friends of ours, so welcome, welcome to our little cavern."

SAM: We also have an item for you, right?

ASHLEY: Oh, yes. So, Morri gave me something that I was supposed to give to you guys if I ever saw you again, and it's a little lens of some sort, so I guess--

MATT: "Right, right, I remember I was talking about that. Ira, you remember?" At this point, you all were keeping eyes, and suddenly with an unnatural speed, (whoosh) he's right up there close to your group, hunched forward, glancing, the goggles still on. His hands reach up and slowly take them off, and it's odd to see the dark lenses and then just dark lenses left behind as he removes them and sets them off onto a table without looking away. (creepily) "This is certainly a surprise."

TRAVIS: (wheezing laughs)

MATT: "I heard there was company coming, and I wasn't expecting acquaintances. I do apologize for the means in which we left off last time. Things are complicated."

ASHLEY: It's okay.

SAM: Is it?

ASHLEY: I don't know.

MARISHA: We're really sorry.

SAM: We're sorry?

MARISHA: For blowing up his laboratory.

SAM: What? Didn't he try to kill us, too?

MARISHA: Mm-hmm.

LAURA: Didn't he kidnap children?

MARISHA: He did.

MATT: Takes the lens. "Not by my intent. I was merely following instructions. If you have issues, take it up with my previous employer."

SAM: Who was who?

MARISHA: Treshi?

MATT: "Indeed. You seem to be a creative lot. After all, you found where I was staying, you found what I was up to, and you thwarted it. Impressive, and trust me when I say, if I wanted to take you all out then and there, I could've, but I sensed a kindred scent here in Calloway I could've, but I sensed a kindred scent here in Calloway and gave you enough time before the collapse of the tower to make your way out, and it seems you did so. So, congratulations. This is indeed what I requested from Morrigan. Quite happy with what she was able to achieve. Here, Ollie, take a look." Ollie takes it in his hand and glances through it. "Right, I'm still learning as I go, but between this and the crown, I think we have what we need."

ASHLEY: What does it do?

MATT: "Well, it tends, at least from what was requested of its creation, it was supposed to be something that can reveal the true nature of enchantment and weave of magic into devices and such, but on a grand scale, as we're looking towards grand things with this device. Which, if you'd like to describe it, look, I'm more of his assistant on this, and I've learned a lot, but I'm still learning, but this is his brainchild, really. Ira, if you don't... By the way, this is... You already seem to know each other, but Ira Wendagoth."

ASHLEY: (whispers) Oh my god, that's right.

MATT: "Anyway, here, you take it over." He takes a minute and cracks his fingers. (Ira) "This here I refer to as the Veilscatter Scope."

MARISHA: Veilscatter Scope.

MATT: "It's a unique cross section of some of my previous work in espionage. It should enable, and does to an extent now, a view of places often only visible through scrying means, and yet pierces even the most powerful protections from such defensive magics, should they be directly in the sight of the device. For instance, who is the curious one of your lot?" As he pockets the lens.

MARISHA: (giggles)

MATT: "Come with me."

MARISHA: (giggling) Okay.

MATT: As he grabs your hand, the fingers wrap around your hand and clutch across his hand.

MARISHA: I've got very tiny, dainty fingers, too.

MATT: Yeah, it's nothing.

TRAVIS: Your hand just comes off.

MARISHA: Yeah, oops!

MATT: He pulls. In this one solid move, he pulls you back, his long, bent limbs, him having to crouch down to get to where you're standing and pulls you to the front of this odd device.

LAURA: She's in it.

ASHLEY: (yelps) Oh sorry. (laughter) (laughter)

MARISHA: Oh my god.

LIAM: Oh my god!

TRAVIS: Oh no, that might've been the best.

MATT: The choice of mug makes it even better.

TRAVIS: Seven years! (laughter) Talent! (laughter)

ASHLEY: I just felt some scratching, and I was like, there's a creature! (laughter)

SAM: But it was a cup.

LIAM: It's Ira. It's Ira. It's Ira!

ASHLEY: Thank you!

TALIESIN: Out of nowhere, Alex Ward--

TRAVIS: Oh my god.

MARISHA: Fucking amazing. (laughter)

ASHLEY: I don't know what I thought was going to kill me in this moment right now.

SAM: Did you request that cup?

ASHLEY: No, I think they saw that I removed--

SAM: Oh, I see.

ASHLEY: -- a can off-screen. They were thinking of me.

MATT: That was fantastic.

ASHLEY: That was very nice, you guys.

SAM: So sweet. (laughter)

MATT: As you're pulled along to the front of the device, it is this odd, strangely-shaped thing here in the shadow as well. It's like being pushed in front of a pile of intentional garbage, like someone had mashed a bunch of trash together, but you come to glance at it up close, and you can see everything is meticulously placed. He seems to almost envelop around you as he places and pushes you towards a front piece and reaches over and grabs part of the device and leads it down, and it almost has a mask or some sort of a place about the size of a head that he begins to lower towards your face.

LIAM: Shunk.

SAM: Is this the facer-offer?

MATT: Yes. "Now, I've had this near completed for months now. Been doing tweaks and really seeing the limitations we had without this wondrous lens, but for now, just put your eyes inside. It's better to show than describe." He pulls it to your face, and it does press onto it. It's a bit large for the shape of your head, but as it does, you immediately, looking forward, you blink for a second and your vision is just of a blue sky, similar to the shade that you've seen above you in Bassuras, but it's a bit shaded, a bit darker in blue. As you're there in place, you see him reach beyond Laudna and starts changing dials and small switches and rapidly (switching dials). You watch as the top of this telescope-like device shifts and begins pushing out into the opening and above the mesa. As it expands, you begin to think, telescopes generally don't work during the day.

LIAM: We've seen one.

MATT: Mm-hmm, you've seen a few designs that seem to buck that idea, which generally are enchantment-based telescopes. As it pushes beyond, you can see there are hinges at certain points in the telescope. As the light begins to hit it, you can see these larger points of articulation along its length, and as it begins to push further and further out, he begins to pull other dials, and you hear the metal creak as it begins to bend, like it can angle the direction it's going. As opposed to just going straight out, it begins to almost curl and shift like a functional periscope.

LIAM: Oh wow. So not angle, but actual (creaks).

LAURA: What?

MATT: Correct.

LIAM: That's fucking creepy.

MATT: As it begins to turn and retract in certain directions, you now can see your vision being shifted around. You are looking at the mesa around you, and you're given a peripheral view of it. As you're glancing, he goes and changes something else. He goes, "Now comes the real fun," and he hits one dial and turns it, and a lens clips over, and as it does, the blue goes to a deep, deep cerulean navy blue, and you can just barely see the horizon at this point. It looks like twilight in the middle of the Hellcatch, you can just see the base outline of the surrounding mesa, but what you do see looks almost like an aurora borealis glow in the sky beyond you, this long, drifting-- it's like a river of faint light drifting in the sky above. You hear, at the back of your ear, Ira's voice. "Can you see it?"

MARISHA: What am I looking at?

MATT: "This is one of the leylines that is drifting across Marquet."

MARISHA: Oh fuck.

MATT: It shifts to the other side, and you see two distant ones that are shifting in space near each other. It's ever so faint, and then it clicks in closer. You hear, with each click, your vision jumps 10 miles, 10 miles. It is pushing extended distances.

TRAVIS: Whoa.

MARISHA: Enhance.

MATT: Straight up. Then he clicks the lens again, and there, you can see beyond the edge of the mountains that go outside of the Hellcatch Valley and beyond, a gentle series of threads, three more of these leylines that are woven together to a nexus point that's drifting over some sort of a dark jungle. "From this point, we can see all sorts of interesting things. Now, this," and he clicks, and you watch as the whole thing bends upward, out of sight, and your vision shifts rapidly into darkness.

MARISHA: Slower. Sorry.

LIAM: Gently.

TRAVIS: Gently!

MATT: Until you see a small, red, spherical object. The red moon of Ruidus in the center of your vision. "Now, what can you see?"

MARISHA: Well, I mean, it looks like Ruidus, but a little bigger. What do I see?

MATT: Roll a perception check.

SAM: Come on, this is the whole campaign here.

MARISHA: I know, I know.

SAM: The whole campaign!

TRAVIS: Everybody's counting on you.

MARISHA: It's like when Imogen biffed it that first time.

LAURA: Yep.

MARISHA: Oh.

SAM: Crazy, crazy roll.

MARISHA: Oh man, it's not good. Seven, it's not good.

MATT: Seven.

LAURA: Aw.

MATT: Well.

MARISHA: It was a crazy roll.

LIAM: Eyes were running.

MATT: You focus in and you can see, in a moment of clarity, the texture of the red moon.

MARISHA: Fuck.

MATT: It looks almost like it's swirling clouds of red, like someone had thrown glitter in a pool of blood and just let it swirl.

LAURA: Cool.

MATT: Slowly, the texture's shifting, and the more you try and focus, the more your brain blurs over, the more you start-- it almost feels like drowsiness, but not. You recall looking through the telescope when you were north of Jrusar, and there's a faint element of that. You couldn't get as clear a vision, necessarily, of it then, but you got a bit of a headache looking at it for a little too long. In here, at this close up, this very crisp image, it's almost like you start losing focus and your thoughts begin to wander once you begin to focus too hard on it.

MARISHA: I'm sorry, I lost a lot of blood today. I'm still a little out of it.

MATT: It disengages from your face, and he pulls back. "So that's where we've been. There are many things we could see with this, but now that you've brought this to us," and he leaps and clamps onto the side of it, holding on, reaches into his pocket and pulls out the lens. "I'm going to get to work." He reaches over with his foot, and you notice at this point he's not wearing any boots. He has these long, thin feet and these prehensile toes that grab his goggles.

SAM, ASHLEY: (groan)

LIAM: Two? Just two of them?

MATT: Mm-hmm, two.

LIAM: No.

MATT: Pulls it up and puts the lens away, puts his goggles back on. "Enjoy your lunch. Rest. Soon enough, maybe we'll see something else." Then leaps up to the side, and you immediately hear the sound of bolts being untightened, of metal being shifted, and he is in the process of beginning the installation of the Weave Lens that you acquired from Morrigan.

LIAM: Is there a Crown of Tides visible in this apparatus?

MATT: Make a perception check.

TRAVIS: There's just a tiara in this bitch.

LIAM: That's cocked.

MARISHA: Yeah.

LIAM: Not great. 16.

MATT: 16. There's a lot of weird little lights and glowing bits to it, but nothing that seems like a crown is visible.

TALIESIN: Are there desks, tables around? Is there any--

MATT: Oh, there's all manner of tables. It is cluttered in here. It's reminiscent of Imahara's shop to a certain point--

TALIESIN: All right.

MATT: -- but a little less with an intent of presentory to a shopping populace. It is a ragged warehouse, or a garage, with a giant project in the middle of it.

TALIESIN: Mm. Anything that looks expensive, magical, small, gem-like, maybe? I don't know, weird rocks?

MATT: Oh. I mean, there's plenty. There are a number of different sizes of these spherical, arcane crystals that you noticed, both of them in Imahara's shop, and that Birdie had been picking up that are affixed, and installed all throughout this device. You can see them in clusters, you can see them embedded in places.

TALIESIN: Oh, I mean, like even on the desks, like anything on the desk, anything in the clutter.

SAM: Anything loose?

TALIESIN: Anything loose sitting around.

MATT: Nothing glowing or magical, but there are all manner of tools. There's scrap materials. You can see bits of carved stone, unfinished runes that are just left out in the open.

TALIESIN: Okay, nothing that exciting. Okay.

MATT: You can make a perception check, if you want.

TALIESIN: We'll see what pops up. I say, barely being able to see, because I took my glasses off. 12, no.

MATT: 12? Yeah, nothing is quite catching your attention.

TALIESIN: All right.

LIAM: What did you see?

MARISHA: Just the moon? But I was able to see it in more detail than ever before, but I don't know. Still looking at it, it just gave me a little bit of a headache. Maybe you will have better luck.

SAM: Or maybe it will come into focus when he installs that thing.

LIAM: So just a close up of the moon.

ASHLEY: What are you trying to accomplish by building this? What are you trying to see?

MATT: (Ollie) "So, here's the thing. We're hoping to figure out the nature of what's keeping us from finding out its nature, so we can try and prevent whatever it's trying to do. That's not just a moon. I get the feeling there's something malevolent, either around it, based around it, within it. I don't trust it."

LIAM: Got any theories?

MATT: He looks back up, as Ira's working away, reaches over and takes a chipped porcelain cup of tea that's probably gotten cold at this point, and takes a sip and pulls up a chair, and turns it around and leans on the front of it towards the rest of you. "I don't know how much your mother's told you. We've been trying to figure out this dubious lunar nightmare since it showed up back home. You were touched by its... They call it flare. When'd you get here? I didn't even see you come in." He glances past, and you see the exhausted goblin start walking in the chamber at this point.

LAURA: Aw.

TALIESIN: Oh. Okay.

MATT: (laughs)

LAURA: Hondir.

SAM: (like Ashley) Ah! (laughter)

MATT: (Hondir) "It has been quite a day, Ollie, but it is good to see you. It has been some time since mainly it has been Birdie coming into the town. Is this it? I've heard so much about it for so long." He's like, (Ollie) "Oh yeah. No, we've been working on it for some time. I'm glad you're here. This is an auspicious time. Perhaps tonight, we'll get what we want out of this."

LAURA: Tonight.

MATT: "Anyway, sorry about the distraction. So Hondir's been a great help with trying to get information that's beyond our resources, if you will. We're not really well integrated here in Exandria, and so we have limitations in what we have access to. But Hondir here's been very well involved with a lot of folks up in some high levels who have been seeing the same patterns we have, and have a great bit of curiosity. So we've sharing information and trying to build a network, but there's a lot of folks that don't believe, and some folks who almost seem actively working against us, which is even more frightening. So. Has she ever told you about your birth?"

ASHLEY: Yes, she said I was born during one of these strange times.

MATT: "Right. We were laying low in Exandria, after a bit of a fun excursion we had in the Fey. Sometimes, it's easy to jump over here and just lay low for a while so folks get calm and simmer down before you return. And then, bygones be bygones, you know, or they just forget about it, and then it's fine. But yeah, it was just a strange thing. Didn't think much of it until a few years after that. Several years later, in the outskirts of the Fey Realm, it just showed up in one of the shaded regions. You're too young to really tell much about this, but I have from my mother what she calls the Squint. I get little glimpses of possibilities when I'm in danger, little flashes of choices, and pick the better one. It's what kept us so good through the work we did. It's like."

ASHLEY: Wow.

MATT: "It's like a faint oracle touch, whatever you want to call it, like different folks, different things for it, but some folks go into a pious realm, with a sort of sight. Don't believe any of that shite. I just use it to make some change and do some business. It's done real well for me since I was young. But usually, they're just teases, flashes, enough to get out of trouble. But when I saw that red moon invading our sky, I had more than a Squint. It was a full vision. I saw the red light of that moon widening, like a hungry mist, decaying the life, and green from our homeland, leaving dust and dull red light in its wake. I saw our home crumble. I saw what was Birdie's silhouette, standing in the center of the light unmoving, reaching for it before it took us all. But looking at you now, I'm not sure it was her silhouette."

ASHLEY: Oh.

MATT: "Anyway, it shook me for days. We were worried we had somehow brought it here with us because of you, and we knew we had to do something or run, so we sought aid from the courts. But we had a less than stellar reputation (chuckles) on all sides, so we ran out of options quickly. We returned home to find the moon seemingly gone suddenly and thought maybe our problems were gone, maybe just took care of itself. But there was something still itching, like I couldn't scratch it. No relief. That was when an Unseelie agent came to us, threatened us, said not to speak to anyone about what we saw. We knew there had to be more to the story, so we followed them back to the Sablecast Grounds, outside of the Unseelie. There, we pierced the veil of an illusion they put up and saw that red moon still hanging as the day as long as when we saw it there. Don't know why they're keeping it up under wraps, but-- I don't know. Seeing it unfettered by dark Fey illusion. There was a cabal of their agents there, conspiring with Exandrian military. I don't know, they had like an eager energy to them, like a devious intent. I just felt it. They were building something. Couldn't trust it. And you know, we do what we do best. We see something we want, we take it. Later that night, we snuck into their operation, we stole something that looked real important from the center of it, didn't know what it was at the time, and then, we ran. Then we took it to Morrigan, to figure out what it was. She told us something a bit more important than we anticipated, and we knew they'd be after us. Couldn't think of a better place to keep it safe than with the old Fatestitcher herself. No one's going to come into her land, not looking for you, anyway. So."

ASHLEY: That's true. It's pretty safe there.

MATT: "Yeah. No one's going to encroach the old hag and come up right as rain after that."

ASHLEY: No.

MATT: "Said she'd take care of you. Promised it. She and Birdie had kind of an amicable past, so she said we could trust her. We knew we were going to come back. I'm sorry it's been so long."

ASHLEY: Oh, it's all right.

MATT: "But that's why we reached out to Ira here when we came out here. We had no other contacts that would listen to us."

ASHLEY: Wow. That's a lot of information.

LAURA: Birdie said Otohan was in that meeting. The woman that we saw in town. But didn't you say she had something on her back?

ASHLEY: Oh, that's right.

LAURA: What was it?

ASHLEY: It was like a... It was a metal something or other, like there were vials in it or something?

LIAM: Tubes or cylinders.

ASHLEY: Tube or cylinders or something. I don't quite know what it is.

SAM: Was it something attached to her?

LAURA: Does that sound familiar to you?

SAM: No.

ASHLEY: I think she was just wearing it.

SAM: She was just wearing it or carrying it?

ASHLEY: Maybe attached somehow.

LAURA: Yeah. That's what I drew.

LIAM: It was a jet pack.

LAURA: Oh yeah.

ASHLEY: It was a jet pack, yeah.

SAM: A jet pack, all right.

ASHLEY: My friend Imogen here, she has, in some ways, visions, maybe Squints, but in her dreams.

LAURA: Potentially. I don't see into the future so much as I... Well, I sort of feel like I might be-- This is dumb. I sort of feel like I might be on Ruidus or something. Sometimes, it's like this red storm sort of overtakes everything and when we looked at the moon through another telescope that we found, well, the storms looked mighty familiar.

MATT: "Hmm."

ASHLEY: And see these? These keep growing every time she has a dream.

MATT: "Hey, Hondir, is this all familiar to you? Do you know anything about this?" He crawls out from behind. (Hondir) "Elements of it seem very familiar. We discussed a bit, but I believe this one here might be one of the special Ruidusborn that I'd mentioned before. There have been an influx of various Ruidusborn, not just-- an escalating amount in recent generations, but last contact I had with one of my compatriots at the Verity says that there have been a strange, large number of Ruidusborn arriving in Yios, asking about things."

LAURA: Are they being called to it, as well?

MATT: "Perhaps."

SAM: Also, by a large number, are you talking about like dozens, or hundreds, or--?

MATT: "Just maybe about a dozen or so."

SAM: And they have similar visions and dreams?

MATT: "Well, they feel compelled to come find any information they can about where they're from. Some of them have spoken about similar dreams. Some of them are just aware of their Ruidusborn nature by their own history."

LIAM: Ollie, you saw mortals, Exandrians?

MATT: "I did, yeah."

LIAM: What can you tell us about the people you saw?

MATT: "Well, one of them, Birdie's seen around Bassuras a few times, Otohan. Birdie's seen around Bassuras a few times, Otohan. I heard you mention the name, a dangerous looking woman. She's quite a figure around these places. The other was, I got a pretty good look at him, an older elven man, long, white silver hair, dressed in gray and blues, carried a cane."

LAURA: Does it sound familiar to any of us?

SAM: Yeah, it does. He was with Otohan. They were the--

LAURA: Oh, he's the one that walked up with him.

SAM: Gray Assassins.

LIAM: Yeah, this is what Birdie told us a bit about this previously.

LAURA: Right, right.

LIAM: So we're--

LAURA: So we actually saw him, though, next to her.

MATT: Oh, no, no, you did not see this figure. These are just-- Birdie mentioned it and he also mentioned it.

MARISHA: Blue and gray. Does like any of those-- I don't know.

MATT: "It's hard to say. I didn't get a great look at the color. It looked gray, it looked blue. Under the twilight of the Sablecast Grounds."

LAURA: Looked white and gold in another light.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MARISHA: Up for debate.

LIAM: But well on in years in elven years.

MATT: "Best I can tell, elves don't really, you know, age like most of your folk do."

LAURA: They age slower. They age slower.

LIAM: I'm aware, I'm aware, yeah.

MATT: "But even from-- I'm rather spry, as far as elven years go, and this one, I don't know, had an air of... an air of history around him, if that makes sense."

LIAM: Yes, sir. Just the two, or was there--?

MATT: "There was just the two of them present, but they were definitely not Fey-bound."

LIAM: And meeting with members of the Unseelie Court.

MATT: "Aye, that's true."

LIAM: Birdie makes it seem like your intentions are good here. By your own admission, you have a bit of a checkered past.

MATT: "Yeah, well, depends on who's asking. Let's be honest, eh? I mean, everything's relative, perspective-wise, you know?"

LIAM: We're friends of your daughter. No judgment. Not too much.

MATT: "If you're worried about what we're trying to do with this thing, to clarify an earlier question, we want to know what it is, and what it's trying to do before something happens. Hondir here's mentioned that there's a sort of an event happening soon. Ira's mentioned these leylines shifting, and it feels like time has been ticking down for years now, all these things lining up, pushing this one direction, and we've just been trying to find the networks of folks we can trust, and if we have a chance, stop it."

LIAM: In case you're concerned, I think I believe you, sir, about your intentions. Right.

MARISHA: I was going to pause and look at the flask.

LIAM: I'm just wondering what your feeling is for your partner here, what you knew about him before all this, and what you think his intentions are. Same as yours, or--?

MATT: "Well, he can hear us."

LIAM: I assumed.

MATT: "I'm not unabashed in my opinion of him. He's not a gracious figure, usually. He's done some pretty terrible things."

LIAM: I've seen firsthand.

TALIESIN: Would have been really awkward if, you know, instead of showing up, he showed up one day wearing your daughter's skin as an overcoat. That would have gone over-- That would have been a faux pas.

MATT: You hear from the back chamber, like, (Ira) "That would indeed have been a faux pas. Not friends and family. That's only for acquaintances. And we're family now."

TALIESIN: I've made an amazing mask of your face, by the way. It's beautiful.

MATT: His head (whoosh) "Show me."

TALIESIN: I'll show you later.

MATT: "Good." (laughter)

TALIESIN: No, it's in the fucking hole.

LAURA: It's in the thing, yeah.

TALIESIN: It's in the hole.

LAURA: Yeah, yeah.

TRAVIS: It's in the hole!

MATT: (Ollie) "Yeah, look. We didn't go to him because we wanted to. We went to him because we didn't know anyone else in Exandria, really, you know? Not least that could get us answers. I mean, you could ask him." He points over, and Ira slowly curls around the corner and pulls the goggles up a bit and goes, "I had grown weary of such post-war times. As my innumerable talents no longer of use to those who once paid me so handsomely for my work, between a wild that bored me and a world that forgot me, I was restless. When these two found me, well, they were clutching Unseelie secrets and speaking a prophecy of terrible portent. It aligned with my own noticing of these Ruidian flares. Yes, I've done many impulsive and selfish things, but, it seemed interesting enough to pursue."

SAM: That's--

LAURA: How do we-- Sorry.

SAM: No, sorry. That's all you get out of this, intellectual curiosity?

MATT: "Well, if you destroy everything, how am I to play with it?"

ASHLEY: I would like to insight check.

MATT: Make an insight check.

ASHLEY: Okay.

LAURA: How do we know you're not just going to take advantage of whatever power you find and betray everyone?

LIAM: Just like the Unseelie Court.

MATT: "You don't."

LIAM: I'm going to join the insight check.

ASHLEY: 18.

MATT: 18, okay.

LIAM: Not as good as 18.

TALIESIN: Can't insight check a crazy person.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: You can if you roll high enough.

SAM: Whispers? Whispers!

TALIESIN: Oh, well. (oohing)

LAURA: Whisper whisper!

SAM: Whispers. These whispers are brought to you by... I did both of these already.

MARISHA: You did.

SAM: I should've done this one now.

LAURA: Yeah, you really should've.

SAM: And this one earlier. D&D Beyond exists, still.

MARISHA: Yeah, still.

SAM: WizKids still exists.

MARISHA: Still exists, yeah. Good for them, honestly.

SAM: They lasted the whole show.

TRAVIS: Check them out.

MARISHA: Good for them.

SAM: Check them out at their respective links, which are right here.

LIAM: Those kids can do anything.

ASHLEY: Okay. Okay.

MARISHA: Yeah.

SAM: Can I do that?

LAURA: No, I don't think so.

SAM, LIAM, LAURA: (laugh)

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: "You don't have to trust me, but if you stop me, then what do you learn?"

TRAVIS: What your insides look like. That's right, bitch! I'm back! (laughter)

ASHLEY: This is Chetney.

MARISHA: This is Chetney.

SAM: Why are you covered in dust?

TRAVIS: The trail went forever. I don't know how you guys haven't been found out. It was just two fucking heel drags straight to the cave.

MATT: (creepily) "It's our tiny, naked, wolven friend. How nice to see you again."

TRAVIS: Yeah. Right. You like what you smell, don't you? Don't you?

LAURA: (laughs)

MATT: Climbs back up to get back to work. The final phrase that goes out as he gets back to his assignment, "You don't have to trust me, just let me work."

TRAVIS: Are we fighting?

SAM, LAURA: No.

TALIESIN: I have a new goal.

SAM: What's your new goal?

TALIESIN: I want to have a drink with that person. I'm very interested.

MARISHA: (snaps) Shut up!

TRAVIS: Whoa. Whoa, hey.

MARISHA: I want to have a drink with him first.

TRAVIS: Oh shit.

ASHLEY: Oh.

MARISHA: I thought it first! I just didn't tell you.

LAURA: Maybe it can just be a Pretty situation. You know, both of you at the same time.

MARISHA: Double date.

TALIESIN: All right, I'm down.

SAM: What are we talking about? I think they want to fuck Spider-Man.

LAURA: They want to fuck the guy. (laughter)

TALIESIN: It could come to that. We don't know.

TRAVIS: Did you find the Keeper of the Moontides Crown? The crown thing in the telescope?

SAM: I think Orym looked or something.

MARISHA: It looks like chaos. It's just a lot of metal.

SAM: It looks like jazz.

TRAVIS: Isn't Ollie in here?

MATT: Yeah, Ollie's here.

MARISHA: Looks like jazz.

TRAVIS: Hi, is there a crown in your machine?

MATT: "There is, yeah. It's the heart of it."

TRAVIS: What's it look like?

MATT: "Looks like a crown."

TRAVIS: On your head? It's not some play on words?

MATT: "No, it's an actual crown. It's a silvery, gossamer crown made partially of metals, partially of an immaterial crystal. It's hard to miss when you see it."

LIAM: Does it do anything on its own?

MATT: "I mean, I put it on. That's what you do when you steal a crown, you put it on."

TRAVIS: Oh yeah.

TALIESIN: That's fair.

LIAM: I know.

TRAVIS: And?

MATT: "It does some pretty interesting things. I had access to some magics I'd never had before, had some fun with that. My night vision was impeccable. I had a strong connection to the sky above. I always knew where I was, I always knew where they were, and I could draw magic from the moon."

TRAVIS: They? The moons?

MATT: "Both of them."

TRAVIS: Wow.

TALIESIN: Perception alteration, the things you saw, the things you felt?

MATT: "Illusions, and some of it more violent, if I wanted it to."

TALIESIN: You had the look. I know that look.

TRAVIS: I came in late, but I think I remember Birdie saying that you guys took the crown from something that was being used by the Unseelie Court in the Fey Realm, right? What were they using it for, and what was the machine? Do you know?

MATT: "I have no idea. At the time-- I don't know machinery. I mean, if Ira was with us, he probably could've seen it, but we just took it and ran. It just looked important and we wanted to disable it, so."

TRAVIS: Was it doing something?

MATT: "No, they were still building it."

TRAVIS: So you walked up to a piece of machinery that was just out there, and you went and grabbed the silvery bit out of the middle of it and ran.

MATT: "Aye."

TALIESIN: Tracks with me, actually.

TRAVIS: Huh.

ASHLEY: Mm. Well. Yeah. Does kind of track.

LIAM: If you don't mind my--

TALIESIN: Literally seen her grab the silvery bit of people and run.

LIAM: If you don't mind my asking, how did you and Birdie meet, sir?

ASHLEY: That's a great question.

MATT: "That's a good story. I was young-ish, I'd say. I was a wandering troupe of singers that were just passing through some of the, you know, grass-shaded glades there in the Feywild, and we just used the music as a way to assuage some of the more temperamental parts of the realm. Made some good cash that way when tangles became an issue with the locals, and while we were there, we, you know, fleeced them a bit if they weren't paying attention, but, you know, kept it fun, kept it light. Even if they found out, they'd be angry a bit, but then we'd laugh it off and have a drink and, you know, just a gentle way of life."

MARISHA: Do you still sing?

MATT: "I mean, I haven't sung much except to my lady in a bit, but."

MARISHA: Oh my gosh, maybe later, get a little sample.

MATT: "Get a couple glasses of wine in me, maybe I can sing for you. I'm a bit rusty. (laughs) Anyway, we were on a good thing for a while, and then there was one small village that I got out-fleeced. There was this young girl, bright and beautiful, just vibrant as the day is long, bubbly, and she took me for everything I was worth, and I was angry for a second, and then we laughed it off over a few drinks, and I realized I loved her. So I asked her to come with me, and she went, 'No.' She asked me to come with her, and I said, 'Yeah.'" (laughter) "So I left the troupe, stayed back. We had some good times just wandering, finding adventure, messing with others, and then, I guess the rest is history."

ASHLEY: Wow. I wish I could've been with you guys, and more.

MARISHA: Sorry, just out of curiosity, how many years ago was that that you met?

MATT: "That I met Birdie?"

MARISHA: Yes.

MATT: "About 11, 12 years on the calendar."

LAURA: Oh.

LIAM: So you've been here for six years.

MATT: "A little over six, yeah, I think so, though it's hard to keep track. We have to keep asking this fellow for his calendar."

LAURA: How does that work?

MATT: "What?"

MARISHA: There just seems to be a bit of a weird timeline discrepancy, because you see here, as Fearne says, she is pretty certain she's 112? 120 years old, and you seem to think that she's definitely not that.

TRAVIS: Yeah, like six.

LAURA: By your logic, she's six years old.

SAM: Well, no, then they were here for six--

MATT: "When we left her behind, she was still a young girl. She wasn't that young."

TRAVIS: Oh, sorry, nine.

LAURA: All right.

ASHLEY: Age was a little fuzzy, but yeah.

MATT: "I thought, I mean, I was going to say, you look a bit old for 14."

ASHLEY: (laughs)

MATT: "Boy, look. Magic between the Fey Realm can get a bit strange, but even that seems a bit extreme." At which point you hear the voice of Ira echoing from the other side of the device go, "Well, you left her with Morrigan. She's a collector of things, and if she knew she had limited time, she may have stretched it for all it's worth."

LAURA: Oh...

MATT: "Wouldn't be the first time."

SAM: Wouldn't be the first time? What does that mean?

MARISHA: Yes, Birdie mentioned... Oh, is Birdie here? Did she come back with you?

TRAVIS: No, I left her out in the desert.

MARISHA: Oh fuck! (laughter)

TRAVIS: There was a crawler- skirmisher that came by. It was kill or be killed!

MARISHA: You tripped her as you ran.

TRAVIS: She was lagging behind! Yeah, it's just common survival. I'm sorry, you'll move on.

MATT: It's about this time that Birdie comes in with a tray of gathered, a complete, interesting scattering of different cups and dishware.

TRAVIS, LIAM: Ah!

MATT: No continuous themes. (laughter)

ASHLEY: Ah! (laughter)

MATT: As well as some warm refreshments that she seems to have prepared, and comes out. "Hi everyone, sorry, it took us a while to clean up our path here. Everyone doing okay? I brought some tea, some mead."

TALIESIN: Oh, that sounds good.

MARISHA: Ooh, yes.

MATT: "Fair enough, here you go."

TALIESIN: Yep, that one.

MATT: "You serve yourselves."

ASHLEY: Sure, thank you.

MATT: She sets it down on one of the tables.

MARISHA: (stutters)

TALIESIN: No, you first.

MARISHA: All right, fine, okay. Okay.

TALIESIN: You went unconscious. You get it.

ASHLEY: I will say, I really do love Morri, and I have grown up with her as my grandmother, so I am very grateful for her and I do love her very much, and I know time is a weird thing where we're from. It's okay.

MATT: You see Ollie looks over to Birdie and they look at each other with a sad face and glance back towards you. (Ollie) "Fearne, if what Ira is insinuating is true, I'm so sorry. I didn't think she'd steal away time like that. I mean, in hindsight, maybe we should've... She's, like the rest of us, hard to gauge, get a bead on, impulsive beings that we are."

ASHLEY: I don't think I am, though. I'm pretty... You know.

MATT: "I'm glad to hear that."

ASHLEY: Yeah, I think I'm pretty--

MATT: "You're missing out on some fun in the process, but."

ASHLEY: I'm just kidding. (laughs)

MATT: "Ah, you're a jokester like your mother."

ASHLEY: People call me a little comedienne.

MATT: "Ah, do they?"

ASHLEY: Yeah. I've done some standup, so.

MATT: "Wow. That's bold. That's brave. I did that once. I bombed real hard."

ASHLEY: Yeah, well.

TALIESIN: (whispers) Stands everywhere, she does.

SAM: Standup, really?

ASHLEY: Well, whatever it's called out here. (laughter)

SAM: More like storytelling, or setups and punchlines?

ASHLEY: Just story time and, you know, I threw together some sketches.

SAM: Oh!

LAURA: Oh wow.

ASHLEY: Back in the day.

LIAM: With the Grenlings or the Upright Seelie Brigade?

MARISHA: Oh! Fuck you! (groaning)

TALIESIN: Wow, really, that quick, that quick? Fuck!

ASHLEY: How did you do that so fast?

TALIESIN: That hurt. Goddamn it.

MATT: Psychic damage was an AoE on that one.

TALIESIN: Wow, wow.

ASHLEY: Literally UCB.

MARISHA: Upright Seelie Brigade, oh my god.

TALIESIN: Wow.

SAM: I like it.

TALIESIN: Don't feel good.

ASHLEY: It's strange because I feel like in some ways I don't know you both, but I do. In some ways, we're very similar.

MATT: "I know. Look, and I think your mother would back me up on this, we did what we did because we felt it was the only way to keep you safe. I'm not proud of it. I'm just sorry."

ASHLEY: Well, I'm still here, so I guess it worked.

MATT: "I suppose. Hopefully..." Looks back up towards the top of the telescope. "If we can somehow manage to get past all this okay, we can make up for lost time."

ASHLEY: I would love that. It's strange that I'm so much taller than you both.

MATT: "Yeah. There are stranger things out there."

ASHLEY: That's for sure.

MATT: "Your caretaker was a tall one."

ASHLEY: Very tall. Very, very tall.

LAURA: How tall? How tall is Morrigan?

ASHLEY: She's probably...

MATT: "13, 14 feet, maybe?"

ASHLEY: Yeah, I was going to say 15, maybe 14.

LIAM: Excuse me?

SAM: How do you get height from someone who's not related to you?

ASHLEY: Maybe she just, with time, made me grow a little bit.

TALIESIN: Encouragement?

ASHLEY: Encouragement, yeah.

TRAVIS: She likes to stretch things out, right?

ASHLEY: She likes to stretch things out real far.

LIAM: Fearne's told us a little bit about Morri, but what was Morri like before Fearne?

MATT: "I've not spoken of her much. She's, like us, one of those outlier fey. She keeps to herself. She's a collector of sorts. She plays guardian to one of her own fanes, place of power, and she does favors for those who ask in exchange for things to add to her collection."

LIAM: Completely outside the court?

MATT: "Aye. She's what you'd call a crone, hag."

LIAM: Oh...

MATT: "All sorts of other types in that realm take variations of that, but she has no coven. She's a strange one in her right. Don't know how old she's been. She's always been around, since I have."

MARISHA: Fatestitcher is quite the title.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MATT: "One of many."

MARISHA: One of many?

SAM: And y'all thought she would be great to take care of your daughter?

ASHLEY: Well, she's wonderful.

MATT: "It seemed to work out okay, for the most part. There could've been worse choices, trust me." Points up towards Ira.

SAM: Sure.

ASHLEY: I have a question. So, in order for Morri to do favors, you have to give her something.

MATT: "Aye."

ASHLEY: Oh. Was I something that you gave for a favor?

LAURA: (gasps)

MATT: "No, we just... We just..." He looks over his shoulder up towards Ira, who's in the process of installing the Weave Lens. You can see him clutching the green circle of glass off to one side, as he's pulling aside bits and beginning to install it. You see Ollie's face just go pale. Looks over at Birdie and she sits down on a chair.

ASHLEY: Oh! This adds a bit of a wrinkle to the story.

MATT: (Ollie) "I don't..." And Birdie talks. "Fearne, we didn't. There wasn't an exchange. Ira, you said that she would make this for us, right? Right?" You hear in the back the voice go: (Ira) "Ah, and with that, it's done!" Closes it. Begins to climb down. "Who would like to take the first look now that it's complete?"

TRAVIS: You can raise your hand.

ASHLEY: Yeah. Maybe Imogen.

LAURA: I would like to.

MATT: "Step right up, my dear."

ASHLEY: It's okay. Go look.

SAM: I'm going to go sit with Fearne.

MARISHA: I'll flank Fearne with FCG and just rub her shoulder a little.

MATT: He goes and adjusts some of the knobs on the side, brings down a couple of lenses. Reaches up with this long arm, this impossibly long arm, and hits this small switch, this pulley switch. The glass, where it sits, where the mask that puts over your face, that's dark, suddenly gets a layer of dull green light across it.

LAURA: Does this give you a headache, Ira?

MATT: "Every time."

ASHLEY: Is something going to happen to her?

TRAVIS: (laughs)

MATT: "I don't think so. Not if I built everything right. Would you prefer me to look first?"

LAURA: No.

SAM, ASHLEY: No.

ASHLEY: No, no, no, no, no.

TRAVIS: Fearne, you should really ask why the Unseelie Court asked your parents to stop building--

LAURA: Can you Guide me?

TRAVIS: -- the telescope the first time.

LAURA: What? What should you ask?

ASHLEY: What?

LAURA: I didn't hear it. What did you say?

ASHLEY: Were you building the telescope the first time?

MATT: Who you saying this to? This is to?

ASHLEY: Ollie.

MATT: "What?"

LAURA: What?

MATT: "No! (scoffs)"

ASHLEY: Am I understanding you correctly, Chet?

TRAVIS: Well, look, when people have holes in their story usually means they're just leaving out the most important parts. No offense, Ollie, but, I mean, you see the Unseelie Court's building a machine that looks like this, but you don't know what it did. So you ran up and you stole this shiny piece right out of the middle of it, and then came over here and built the same thing.

MATT: (defensively) "We didn't build the same thing."

TRAVIS: Hmm. What was the Unseelie Court building?

MATT: "I don't know."

TRAVIS: Who does?

MATT: "Probably those who were there meeting with them."

ASHLEY: How do you know you're not building the same thing, if you don't know what it was?

TRAVIS: And why do they want the crown back so bad?

MATT: "Ira, what we building?" Ira's still there just holding Imogen.

ASHLEY: Fuck!

MATT: Gently pushes her face into the mask. As you glance through the light, you see before you the green sheen across what is almost a dark universal sky across what is almost a dark universal sky speckled with stars, and there in the center is the slightly muddied red of Ruidus, a familiar sight, both in your dreams and previous viewing through a telescopic-like device. But there's something you've never seen before around it. There is a shape that encompasses it, clear as day, There is a shape that encompasses it, clear as day, like a field of energy, like something that encapsulates it. Not unlike some of the magical force fields and such that you've learned to generate and create, but it completely encases it. It has a texture. A texture like a lattice weave. Like an extremely powerful gathering of different magical threads that create this textured, fence-like weave that just seals it off in time.

LAURA: Does it look like the leylines all the way around it? Or does it look more like a cage?

MATT: It looks more like a cage, is the best way I can describe it. It doesn't look quite like leyline energy. It looks strong, distinct, unlike something you've seen before.

SAM: While she's looking, I'm going to just Bind with her.

MATT: Sympathetic Bind?

SAM: Yeah, and I'm going to give her a bonded blessing just in case she needs a little extra boost of something.

MATT: Okay, you got it.

LIAM: Orym's just going to take a couple of small steps closer to the two of them by the telescope, just to be closer.

TALIESIN: Yep, just going to help start flanking that.

LAURA: There's something being kept up there. It's a prison.

MATT: "What do you see? Tell me."

LAURA: I see a god that can't get out. Am I right?

MATT: "This is the first I'm hearing of it."

SAM: Insight check.

TRAVIS: Ooh...

MATT: Make an insight check.

MARISHA: Hell yeah, come on, FCG.

ASHLEY: Can I insight check as well?

SAM: 16.

MATT: Sure, if you'd like. Hard to read.

SAM: Hard to read.

ASHLEY: 24.

TRAVIS: He let them build--

MATT: 24.

SAM: Ooh!

LAURA: I know.

ASHLEY: (sighs)

LIAM: Yeah.

MARISHA: Because he already knows?

TALIESIN: No.

SAM: Just got to hold this up. (laughs) I don't have to do anything. They can just read it.

LAURA: Second whisper!

MARISHA: (laughs)

LAURA: Fearne!

MARISHA: Put it in the battle cam.

SAM: Yeah.

MARISHA: There you go. (laughter)

TRAVIS: (whispers) Matthew Mercer.

MATT: "An imprisoned god you say. Interesting." Peeks up past your head over towards Ollie and Birdie and Hondir. They all look fearful and taken aback by it.

LAURA: Does it look like I see any breaks in that weave? Do I see anything that looks weaker or open?

SAM: Or anything past it.

LAURA: Yeah, I want to see.

MATT: Make a perception check.

ASHLEY: Oh..

TRAVIS: Okay.

LAURA: Are you going to?

ASHLEY: My hair is standing up.

SAM: You have d6 if you want to use it.

LAURA: Enhance.

MARISHA: It looks familiar?

LAURA: Or it's unlike anything I've seen?

MATT: Unlike anything you've ever seen.

MARISHA: Okay.

LAURA: Isn't that what happened the last time? That happened the last time!

LIAM: Can't read your bee die. Oh yeah, she did.

LAURA: I woofed it.

LIAM: Completely woofed it.

SAM: You got a d6.

LAURA: Doesn't matter, it's a one. It's the same thing I did.

SAM: Plus six! Plus six!

MARISHA: It's the exact same thing!

LAURA: The last time I looked, I got a one then two. That's fate right there.

TRAVIS: That's some kind of magic.

MARISHA: Fuck! What does it mean?

MATT: Focused on this, it's still a fresh sight.

LAURA: Ugh!

MATT: As you look through it, the sense of a headache As you look through it, the sense of a headache that was mentioned before by Laudna never takes root. You swear there's something you're missing here.

LAURA: Yep. Orym?

LAURA, MATT: (laugh)

SAM: Why are you so bad at using telescopes?

LAURA: It's because my glasses always bump into them.

SAM: Oh, that's what it is!

ASHLEY: That's right!

LAURA: What?

TRAVIS: Or do you need to shift the telescope?

LAURA: I don't need to...

SAM: Shift it?

LAURA: No, I rolled a one. I need to not roll a one.

SAM, MATT: (laugh)

MARISHA: Ira, do you not want to take a glance into your creation?

MATT: (menacing) "Oh, I'll have plenty of time. But you're guests and you've come this far, it would be rude."

MARISHA: Well, you just worked so hard and you finally have this key item.

MATT: "If you tell me to, I won't say no. I was merely offering the invitation. If that's what you wanted."

TRAVIS: I mean, I'm interested, unless Fearne's got hanker.

LIAM: I'll look.

TRAVIS: Okay.

LAURA: (laughs)

SAM: But, Orym, how will you reach?

MARISHA: There's a little stool over there.

LIAM: Stand on your shoulders.

SAM: Oh, okay.

LIAM: We wheel up.

LAURA, MATT: (laugh)

MATT: Like the best Gizmoduck cosplay you've ever seen.

SAM: Uh-huh!

LIAM: I look back at Imogen.

LAURA: It's fucked up.

LIAM: I pat FCG. Want to help me out?

SAM: I'll pat your back and give you Guidance.

LIAM: Thank you. I clutch the shield and, like always, I can just feel it slightly vibrate and just the vision sharpen. Here we go. Nope.

MARISHA: You got to be fucking me!

LIAM: Natural 20. (gasps) (oohing)

LAURA: That's what--

LIAM: Plus one. So 21 plus-- 27.

SAM: You needed a 28. (laughter)

LIAM: It's on the Ruidus die too, by the way.

LAURA: Yeah.

ASHLEY: Oh!

MATT: That's amazing. You click in, and you're trying desperately to ignore the feeling of Ira's fingers like wrapped around your shoulder as he sets you into the machine.

LIAM: I'm one fifth the size of that hand.

MATT: Yeah. Glancing in, he adjusts some of the elements. Glancing in, he adjusts some of the elements. "Does that help? Tell us what you see." As you focus in, you see the same lattice shape. You blink a bit. Roll a religion check for me.

LAURA: Oh my god.

TRAVIS: Come on, Moonweaver, let's go.

LIAM: I have a plus one to this. Eight.

MATT: Eight.

SAM: Eurgh.

LAURA: ♪ Better than a one, though ♪

MATT: It's true! While the nature of this lattice-like field that contains the red moon evades you, your eyes catch a glint in the middle of the red storm, as the device is scanning past the front of it, and it's moving away from it. Do you say anything?

LIAM: I see a glint? Oh, sure, I will reach out and grab Imogen's hand, which is right above me. Yank her over and duck my head down.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: Oh!

MATT: As Ira's still turning the device and is scanning past it.

LAURA: Wait, stop!

MATT: It clicks in a few more places and it gets in a little bit closer and pushes, and you can see it straining. There's the energies of all the orbs around it. You can see, for those of you who aren't in the device, they're now bright. There is a vibrant hum in the chamber, (electric hum) as it is drawing all the energy from these various orbs that have been collected and embedded within this machine. It's taking a lot of power to do what it's doing.

LIAM: Orym also takes his hand with the sentinel shield on it and I reach down and interlace hands with Imogen and clasp to try to send the vibration of that shield into her.

MATT: Now you've seen a few storms in your time. Red clouds swirling, angrily, aggressively, hungrily in your dreams, moving and consuming, behind them nothing but dust and shadow. As this device pushes past the layer of lattice cage-like energy, pushing beyond the boundaries of your vision, the storm, clearer than it's ever been, you see it part for about a moment. And there's a city.

MARISHA: (gasps)

MATT: And that's where we're going to end tonight's episode. (screaming)

TRAVIS: You can't do that! You can't do that!

MARISHA: We're going to the moon!

TRAVIS: What do you mean?

MARISHA: Oh, you bitch!

ASHLEY: Ooh! Ooh!

SAM: What? What? What is it?

ASHLEY: Something just... I don't want to say it. I don't want to say it.

MARISHA: What?

ASHLEY: Maybe when the cameras go off.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

ASHLEY: I have an idea. I have an idea!

SAM: Wait, what do you mean when the cameras go off?

ASHLEY: No, I know, just in case... No, I'm not even going to tell anybody.

TRAVIS: Save it, save it!

ASHLEY: I'm going to save it.

MATT: Save it, save it, save it. I don't know what it is, but I'm excited to hear it.

ASHLEY: It's not that exciting.

MARISHA: ♪ The moon is a god prison We're going to the moon ♪

TALIESIN: She is my god.

LAURA: ♪ Going to the moon ♪ Why are there keys on that?

MATT: So.

SAM: You don't know! (laughter)

TRAVIS: I haven't seen your tankard in five months. "Not haunted, just vibing." Good.

MATT: All right, well, we'll pick up there next episode. Here staring into the--

LAURA: The little moon always looks at the little moon!

ASHLEY: The little moon.

MATT: Aww. You built a character that sees everything.

TRAVIS: Call it by its real name.

LIAM: Man, I rolled a 20.

ASHLEY: Oh man!

MATT: I don't know what that means. Anyway.

ASHLEY: Dude, we get to take a freaking rocket to the moon? (laughter) I hope we get to go the moon!

LIAM: I always wanted to go to the sun.

TRAVIS: Last of Us was just a warm up.

MATT: There you go!

SAM: Man, seeing Laudna in anti-gravity would be pretty cool.

ASHLEY: I mean... (laughter)

MARISHA: Just crazy hair! (laughter)

TALIESIN: Little bits just crackling off and just slowly moving in different directions.

LIAM: We played Dead Space.

ASHLEY: Oh god, I loved Dead Space.

MATT: You do!

SAM: Okay!

LAURA: Okay, okay, okay.

SAM: Focus, end of the show.

MATT: We'll think on this shit. We'll be back to see where this goes next session we have. But, in the interim, thank you so much for joining us. We love you very much, and is it Thursday yet? Good night! (screaming)