Transcript:Unwanted Reunions

List of Transcripts

Pre-Show
MATT: Hello everyone, and welcome to tonight's episode of Critical Role, where a bunch of us nerdy-ass voice actors sit around and play Dungeons & Dragons.

ALL: We play Dungeons & Dragons!

MATT: Everyone's already got senioritis for the holidays, man.

(laughter)

TRAVIS: Senioritis!

LIAM: You're right though, you're so goddamn right.

(laughter)

TALIESIN: Time for a shopping trip.

MATT: Yeah, I'm used to having to like, close my ears. But yeah, welcome, guys. Before we get into tonight's session, that's the one I was going to say. Tonight's game, we're going to go ahead and go through a few announcements here, beginning with our first of two sponsors for the night, beginning with our friends, returning from Idle Champions. Sam.

SAM: Hey there, ladies and elves. It's me, your ho ho host for the night, stand-up Santa. What, you don't believe I exist? Can't you feel my presence?

TRAVIS: Oh.

ASHLEY: Oh.

SAM: No, you don't have sugar plums dancing in your head, it's really me, the St. Nick of shtick, doing a little advertising warm-up routine to get into the holiday spirit.

TRAVIS: Oh boy.

SAM: Yeah, it's all like this.

TRAVIS: Is that plugged in?

SAM: Tonight-- No. (laughter) Tonight's episode of Critical Role is brought to you by Idle Champions of the Forgotten Realms, a strategy game that unites iconic Dungeons & Dragons characters from novels, campaigns, and popular shows into one epic adventure. And speaking of epic adventures, you should try Mrs. Claus' meatloaf. My wife's dinners are so bad, we pray after we eat. Actually... (laughter) Me and Mrs. Claus split up recently. I go out with the reindeer one night a year. Turns out, she goes with the elves every night of the year. Ho!

ASHLEY: Oh boy. (groaning)

TALIESIN: Ho ho?

SAM: But back to the ad.

LIAM: Layers.

SAM: The latest addition to Idle Champions is the legendary Hand of Vecna. Players can get a brand-new Hand of Vecna Arkhan skin and feat pack, that's F-E-A-T, not feet, for Joe Manganiello's infamous character Arkhan the Cruel, through the in-game shop. Speaking of the Hand of Vecna.

TALIESIN: Weird to hear with that accent.

SAM: Speaking of the Hand of Vecna, I found out my wife enjoys the hand of Vic the elf while Santa's out hauling presents. Now I got to keep three lists: nice, naughty, and divorce attorneys.

ASHLEY: Oh boy.

LIAM: Ho!

SAM: Ho!

TRAVIS: Can you go "baa?"

MATT: Can't all be winners.

TRAVIS: Kind of look like a holiday goat.

SAM: But back to the ad! The game's also available for PC and Mac on Steam and web, Xbox One, PlayStation 4, iPad, iPhone, and all Android devices. Hey, speaking of computers.

TALIESIN: Oh god!

ASHLEY: Oh no.

SAM: I'm all over those dating sites. I'm on Single Kringle. (laughter)

ASHLEY: That's a good joke.

TALIESIN: You got one, well done.

SAM: I'm on Ski Harmony. And my favorites on those cold North Pole nights, Match and Tinder. (chuckles) (groaning) Hey, I've gone out with lots of women, but no one wants a second date. I guess they're Claustrophobic.

ASHLEY: Oh wow.

SAM: I'm telling you, those reindeer are starting to look more attractive every day. Why do you think I call that one Vixen? What can I say, I've got low elf-esteem. (groaning and laughter) Okay, back to the ad. For more information, check out idlechampions.com/criticalrole, and thanks to Idle Champions of the Forgotten Realms for supporting my set tonight. Thank you, you been a great crowd, back to you, Matt.

(Ashley clapping)

TRAVIS: Wow.

MATT: Thank you, Sam. Thank you, Idle Champions.

TALIESIN: Any theory that we actually have writers on this show is now officially dead.

SAM: I bombed for my own friends, I bombed!

ASHLEY: Hey.

MATT: We still love you, Sam.

ASHLEY: I enjoyed it.

(laughter)

TALIESIN: I enjoyed the green screen.

ASHLEY: I really liked the Single Kringle.

TALIESIN: Single Kringle was good.

MARISHA: Yeah, that was the standout.

ASHLEY: And the Vixen, that was, reindeer.

SAM: Hey, I'll keep that one in the set.

(laughter)

MATT: He's workshopping here.

SAM: Yeah, these are all new jokes.

ASHLEY: You ended strong.

SAM: Thank you.

TRAVIS: Do you teach any defensive comedy driving classes?

(laughter)

MATT: Okay. Thank you, Sam, and thank you, Idle Champions, for your patience. (laughter) And our second sponsor for tonight, our returning friends from D&D Beyond.

TRAVIS: ♪ D&D Beyond ♪ MATT: D&D Beyond, of course, if you don't know at this point, is a fantastic online tool for maintaining your D&D characters, your D&D campaigns, for creating homebrew content, all kinds of cool shit, definitely check it out if you haven't yet. They're good folks that do good work, and it's been super useful for us. So thank you guys for your continued support. And you won the wonderful gift tonight of not having that be your advertisement.

(Sam and Matt laughing)

TRAVIS: It is a gift.

SAM: Idle Champions.

(laughter)

LIAM: I'll say this about it, though. It was long.

(laughter)

TALIESIN: You did slay.

(groaning)

SAM: Oh, that's a quality joke.

TRAVIS: You did slay!

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: Yeah, is your special going to be on HB Snow?

(groaning)

SAM: I should really have pitched these jokes to you guys first.

(laughter)

TRAVIS: It's contagious.

MATT: This is problematic, is what it is. All right, so, our fantastic two sponsors. Marisha, you have some announcements to make, don't you?

MARISHA: (goofy) Yes!

(laughter)

Woo. Next week will be our final week of live programming for the year, for 2019. We will return from our winter break on Thursday, January 9th for Critical Role. Don't worry, we'll still have our normal broadcast next week, and you should definitely check out the finale for this season of Travis Willingham's Yee-Haw Game Ranch next week. It's going to be good, yeah.

SAM: Are there secrets revealed?

MARISHA: Matt, Brian, and I, and Travis will be playing some Super Smash Brothers--

TRAVIS: Oh!

MATT: Oh, you're all are going down.

MARISHA: Yeah, at 4:00pm, December 17th, and yeah, we'll be taking a--

MATT: I'm going to destroy all of you.

MARISHA: It's bad.

MATT: I cannot wait.

MARISHA: You just, like--

MATT: I didn't know it was going to be Smash Brothers.

TRAVIS: That's the one where you jump around?

LIAM: Madness in his eyes.

MATT: Fighting games is my thing.

TALIESIN: This is a thing that happens.

MARISHA: There's no rhyme or reason to like, balance or any type of fairness.

TRAVIS: Can we do three on one? Can we like, all three of us fight Matt?

MARISHA: It's full-on brawl.

MATT: We can probably do that.

TALIESIN: If you want to feel that bad about yourself.

LIAM: Can we hold for a second? Sam has one Santa hair on his face and it looks like a Santa pube, and I don't want to look at it anymore.

MARISHA: There we go.

SAM: Thank you, thank you very much.

MARISHA: Yeah, but then after that we'll be taking a short break from Travis Willingham's Yee-Haw Game Ranch, and then we will return probably in the spring.

MATT: Hell yeah.

MARISHA: Yeah.

ASHLEY: I love it so much.

TRAVIS: It is some dopey fun.

MARISHA: It is some dopey-ass fun.

MATT: Wash the Mario Party out of my system.

TRAVIS: You won. No, Marisha won.

MATT: It's a Mario Party win.

TRAVIS: Marisha won. You didn't win.

TALIESIN: Mario Party, I mean--

MARISHA: Go Daisy!

MATT: Yeah, I won the final round.

ASHLEY: Wait, can I say a thank you real quick?

MATT: Yeah, sure.

ASHLEY: Thank you to Christina for making these most lovely bags for all of us.

MARISHA: Yes, they're amazing.

ASHLEY: They're so beautiful. Holy cow, yeah.

TALIESIN: It's got secrets.

ASHLEY: Look at this, the Stormlord. And on the inside, ah.

MARISHA: Super cute.

ASHLEY: The inside has flowers in it.

MATT: Aww, that's amazing.

ASHLEY: Yeah, that was so nice of you, thank you so much.

TALIESIN: It's very nice, thank you.

ASHLEY: I love it.

TALIESIN: I keep sorting my dice.

MATT: Cool. That's amazing. We have a few quick announcements to make after that. We did announce two of our convention dates for 2020. If those haven't seen yet, we will be at C2E2 in Chicago, coming up at the end of February. Super excited to be returning and see folks out there, and we are going back to London for MCM London come May in 2020, super stoked to get over to Europe again to see a bunch of you folks. Pre-sale autographs and photo op tickets will be on sale soon, check out critrole.com/events for all the information regarding both events as it progresses.

TRAVIS: I'm fucking stoked, because Laura and I were with child last time, so this is our first time going to London with you guys.

MARISHA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: (weird accent) Going to London.

(laughter)

ALL: "London."

ASHLEY: That's the proper way to say it.

MATT: That's RP British, yeah.

TRAVIS: It's the Queen's English.

MATT: (giggling)

TRAVIS: Your majesty. London.

MATT: Awesome. Second announcement, for those who haven't seen, our next issue of the comic book series Vox Machina Origins comes out next Wednesday, December 18th. This is a beautiful cover, and the interior is equally beautiful, fantastic work. All the artists in this team are amazing. The fantastic cover by Sam Hogg, one of our wonderful critter artists, did a phenomenal job.

SAM: Can I ask a question about this issue? Because I genuinely don't know. Do we finally get to know what happened with Grog?

MATT: You'll have to read it.

TALIESIN: Oh god, we actually get to find out?

SAM: But is there an answer in the book?

LIAM: You will have to find out on the 18th.

SAM: Ugh!

ASHLEY: Can I look at it?

MATT: Sure.

ASHLEY: Just up close.

LIAM: It is a beautiful book.

TALIESIN: This may be the one piece of lore that none of us know except for Travis and Matt.

MATT: Yeah, yeah.

LIAM: Oh man.

TRAVIS: What?

MATT: And maybe we keep it that way. You don't know.

TALIESIN: I hate you.

MATT: (cackles) So yeah, definitely look for that next week, and join me and possibly a few other people that might show up next Wednesday as well on December 18th at 5:00pm Pacific here on our Twitch channel for an end of the year fireside chat hangout.

MARISHA: Yay.

MATT: We're going to be coming comfy in pajamas and whatever else you decide to wear. Preferably come clothed, TOS and all.

SAM: Not Single Kringle, no.

MATT: Oh boy. (laughter) We're going to be hanging out, answering questions, and just chatting with the community, wrapping up 2019 together. So see you guys next Wednesday at 5:00pm right here. Those are all of our announcements. We're hoping Laura might pop in at some point tonight. She has absconded to the Video Game Awards, which happened to be simultaneous.

LIAM: Because she's the best!

MATT: Because she is the best.

ASHLEY: Yeah!

MATT: But if for whatever reason, she manages to--

MARISHA: She should win!

MATT: I know. But hopefully she'll show up at some point, if not, no worries, she has better things to do.

TRAVIS: She looks so pretty.

MATT: I know.

ASHLEY: She does look so pretty.

MATT: That's it and that's all, so I think it's time for us to dive in to tonight's episode of Critical Role.

(water bubbling) (thunder) (explosion) ♪ Role, Critical Critical♪ ♪ Role, Critical Critical ♪ ♪ Role, Critical Critical ♪ ♪ Role, Critical Critical Role ♪ ♪ Mighty Nein, Mighty Nein ♪ ♪ Roll the dice, roll the dice ♪ ♪ The adventure begins ♪ ♪ They were always beside you ♪ ♪ Your nerdy best friends ♪ ♪ And the DM to guide you ♪ ♪ And they rise from the flames for the battles ahead ♪ ♪ Villains beware 'cause you're 'bout to be dead ♪ (dramatic music) ♪ They got magic and flair ♪ ♪ They got falchions and cunning ♪ ♪ They don't see over there ♪ ♪ There's a monster incoming ♪ ♪ Inspiration is waiting, rise up, don't think twice ♪ ♪ Put your fate in your hands, take a chance, roll the dice ♪ ♪ Roll the dice ♪ ♪ Roll the dice ♪ ♪ Critical Role ♪ ♪ Critical Role ♪ ♪ Critical ♪ ♪ Can you answer the call? ♪ ♪ Dig in deep in your soul ♪ ♪ As the legend unfolds ♪ ♪ Now it's your turn ♪ ♪ Your turn, your turn ♪ ♪ To roll ♪ (flames crackling) (dragon roaring)

Part I
MATT: Welcome back. That got intense. Now everyone's awake. So, last we left off, the Mighty Nein had found their way to the capital of the Empire, Rexxentrum, to discover both a Kryn Dynasty assault on the city, overlapping simultaneously with the arrival of Obann and his found family of seemingly unkillable figures he had collected as part of a ritual to unleash the Angel of Irons, which had been found to actually be Tharizdun, the Chained Oblivion, catfishing the fuck out of Obann, as well as the rest of the cult, it seems. You managed to destroy the Laughing Hand, free Yasha from the mind control that Obann had inflicted upon her, destroy Obann's physical form. In the moment before he could return back to the Hells to reform, he was punished for his inability to fulfill his promise, realizing Tharizdun, in the final moment, was corrupted into what was Obann the Punished, a horribly malformed, inky, tentacled creation, an abomination in the image of the Chained Oblivion. You did battle with this creature, barely managing to scrape by because you have two clerics in your group, one of which is a grave cleric. I'm learning lessons on how much harder I have to come at you guys.

TRAVIS: No, no, no, don't, no lessons.

MATT: And some lucky rolls, some really lucky rolls.

LIAM: Don't forget to love each other?

MATT: Yeah, love each other, guys. In doing so, you found your ally, Pumat, heavily hurt, but survived. You garnished the attention of the Righteous Brand, and it seemed that this incursion by the Kryn had, almost simultaneously with your battle, ended in retreat, seemingly for no reason. You were then brought by a captain of the Righteous Brand to Castle Ungebroch, to meet with King Dwendal himself of the Dwendalian Empire, along with a number of other figures currently in his council at the moment, including Allura Vysoren, the head of Rexxentrum's Archive, and Sydnock Truscan, the Prime Arbiter of the Empire, and you saw to be Trent Ikithon alongside the Martinet Ludinus Da'leth. During this period of time, it was revealed that Ludinus' associate, his assistant, if you will, Vence, seemed to be the figure heavily tied into this cult business, much to his surprise at seeing, and those of the council. You were also discussing your interactions with Xhorhas and the Bright Queen, and it was revealed as part of this conversation, your interactions there, and the alliance that you had made on that side of the conflict. As part of that, you were charged with using this relationship, possibly helping bring about some sort of a meeting, a parley, a negotiation, to possibly bring elements of this conflict to an end, as it seems that a large portion of this conflict stemming from the theft or disappearance of these beacons, supposedly by the Empire, the members of the Cerberus Assembly say they've recovered the relic in question and are eager to return it if it means the bloodshed will come to an end. So, given this missive by the King of the Empire, you were assigned to meet in the coming morning with the Martinet himself to discuss how to go about this plan of action. So, Mighty Nein, as you exit, assisted by a number of members of the Righteous Brand, you are giving your weapons back that you had left within the waiting chamber, and you are pushed back out into the Shimmer Ward, at this point now in the later afternoon, the clouded skies starting to take the color of a coming sunset, and the afternoon is yours. You know supposedly rooms are going to be situated or prepared for you at a place referred to as the Camarouth Cottage here in the Shimmer Ward, and in the morning you will be meeting with Ludinus.

LIAM: Point of clarification.

MATT: Yes?

LIAM: These motherfuckers right here, from the Assembly, said they just found-- like recently found-- the beacon.

MATT: Correct.

LIAM: Okay. Lying motherfuckers.

MATT: Maybe it's a misunderstanding. So, escorted out of the castle terrace. You are let within the Shimmer Ward, and the guards go back into the castle. You are no longer under watch, and the Shimmer Ward is yours.

SAM: There's no escort with us?

MATT: At the moment, no.

TALIESIN: Are we being shadowed?

MATT: Make a perception check.

TRAVIS: Come on, first roll of the night. Let's go, Taliesin, hey, hey, hey.

TALIESIN: No, sadly it's only a 15.

MATT: You're looking around in the vicinity. You do not see yourselves being immediately shadowed or followed.

TALIESIN: Okay. I think we might be in the clear.

TRAVIS: The sun is setting; should we perhaps find a place to lodge for the night, and discuss what just happened?

LIAM: They are putting us up.

SAM: The cottage, is that right?

MARISHA: Camarouth Cottage.

LIAM: Camarouth?

MARISHA: Camarouth.

MATT: Camarouth.

TRAVIS: I'm on the wrong page of notes, one second.

TALIESIN: I don't know about the rest of you, but the less time we spend in this place, the happier I'll be. Do we want to try and stock up on anything before we--?

SAM: This is Caleb's hometown. Don't disparage it in front of him.

TALIESIN: I'm not disparaging it. I'm just saying, this place gives me the creeps.

MARISHA: I have a feeling he's not offended by that.

TALIESIN: Are you offended by that?

LIAM: I'm not offended by that.

TALIESIN: Yeah, see, it's fine.

SAM: I retract my chiding.

TALIESIN: Fair.

LIAM: I need to pick up a few things. What do you need? I can probably get us there.

TALIESIN: Health potions.

SAM: Oh, yes.

TALIESIN: Diamonds, anything. Stocking up for every inevitability.

TRAVIS: Our normal fare.

SAM: Yeah, normal things that people buy: diamonds and health potions.

LIAM: Do I have any insight as to-- this is New York City. I know fairly well, except I've never been here, because this is my first time.

MATT: The places that you-- you didn't commonly frequent these locations. You were still a student.

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: And on a student's income, which was nothing at all.

LIAM: Right, so I saw a small percentage.

MATT: A very small percentage. And most of the interactions you had with healing potions and such were those that were given out as part of your training at the Soltryce Academy, and then otherwise were places that were specifically being organized by the Cerberus Assembly. A lot of those places you gather are probably connected to the war effort, but you go ahead and make a history check for me.

LIAM: I was going to say, do I know anything about the different wards, at least? Knowing the different areas?

MATT: Yeah, yeah, if you have any questions, you have the map there, but the--

LIAM: I rolled a one.

MATT: Rolled a one? Well. Well.

TALIESIN: Shook up, huh?

MATT: You may have to ask around, then. (laughs) There's the Mosaic Ward, which is the northern, impoverished neighborhood, which is largely a very muddy district. The streets-- it's the one part of the city where it isn't really cobblestone. The streets just become dirt, and because of the fairly common moisture and rainfall that happens here, it leads to an extremely brown, muddy district. So it's what's referred to as the Mosaic Ward. It's really just one color and it's--

TALIESIN: Nice name.

MATT: I'm sorry, that's the Mudtop Ward. The Mosaic Ward--

TALIESIN: Mudtop.

MATT: Mudtop makes a lot more sense. It's my brain.

TRAVIS: That's amazing.

MATT: That's pretty great. The Mosaic Ward is a lot more colorful. Colorful banners, small fences. It's a housing district. That's mostly on the Southern portion of the city.

MARISHA: Oh, it's like the arts district?

MATT: In some ways. The Tangles is what you're most familiar with, and that's what you guys have traveled through mostly, which is the central, it's a semicircle region to the center and southwestern side of the village. That's where a lot of the working class resides in the city. A lot of the general commerce happens there. There are many, many smaller streets, and the overall look of where everything meets and gathers in the way that the streets weave through the city looks like a large tangle from an overhead view. It's where the city was first built, and as it expanded, the structure seemed to, you know, find a better means of being planned out and built. So the center, towards the city outside of the Shimmer Ward, it's a little messier and it's the older parts of the town.

LIAM: And the academy is in the Shimmer Ward, ja?

MATT: Correct.

TALIESIN: Ooh. We haven't taken a short rest either. We are all just beat to fuck right now, aren't we?

TRAVIS: Yep.

LIAM: I'm on death's door.

SAM: And what time of day is it?

MATT: It's late afternoon, probably starting to get closer to sunset in the next hour or so.

TALIESIN: Do maybe--

SAM: Go night night?

TALIESIN: Maybe we just turn in, then, and save going out into the world for tomorrow.

TRAVIS: Love that.

LIAM: Excuse me, Grandfather.

MATT: "Yes?" This really well-dressed, older human gentleman, lots of jewelry on his fingers and jangling bands around his wrists turns, liver spotted head where the hair is receded back into this advanced widow's peak that comes very far forward, and the back of it reaches the very top of the head, turns. "Can I help you?"

LIAM: We are not from these parts, and I am looking to do some shopping. I need some jewels, specifically, and then also maybe you know of shops that cater to arcane nature?

MATT: Make a persuasion check.

TRAVIS: How much money you got?

MATT: That's cocked.

LIAM: Okay, cool. That was almost the same thing. Persuasion?

MATT: Yes.

LIAM: 11.

MATT: He goes, "Sorry, I don't have anything to give you." And quickly turns away and ignores you.

SAM: No, no, he's not a beggar, he just looks--

MATT: "Ah!"

SAM: Oh, sorry.

MATT: And he just quickly shuffles--

ASHLEY: No, it's okay.

MATT: "Gah!" (laughter) "I don't want to new trouble." Looks around at the whole crew now circling.

TRAVIS: I use Mask of Many Faces to look like a piranha and I'm like: (growling) Tell us where it is!

(laughter)

MATT: Where are the diamonds?

(laughs)

LIAM: All right, well, Caduceus, maybe we should wipe all this blood off of ourselves.

TALIESIN: Perhaps we should. It occurs to me I'm a little worse for wear right now.

MARISHA: Oh yeah. Oh god.

ASHLEY: I forgot about that.

TALIESIN: (chuckles)

SAM: Do you know where this place is?

TRAVIS: Camarouth Cottage.

SAM: Yes, but where in town? You know where it is, Cay-Cay?

LIAM: Where did they tell us it was?

TRAVIS: The Shimmer Ward.

MATT: They didn't tell you where it was. But it wouldn't take you too long to find it. The Shimmer Ward isn't extensively massive. And looking around, I'd say it'd take you about 10 minutes or so to locate it. It's on the southwestern side of the Shimmer Ward, not too far from the main gates where you entered.

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: Probably placed there because it's closest to where most of the foot traffic enters and exits the area.

LIAM: All right, we limp our way there.

MATT: Okay. You guys eventually come upon a beautiful, expansive, two-story inn of pale yellow stone and braided thatch for roofing. The windowsill gardens are lush, and the rooms each hold their own separate balconies that overlook the entirety of the ward, visible from that second floor. As you approach, the front doors are actually partially ajar, and you can see there's wooden wedges jammed underneath to keep them somewhat open. There are some puddles of water that you maneuver around before you get to the front entryway. But as you step inside, you can already see the nice dark cherry wood interior and the tall ceilings that make up the main entryway. There's magically lit chandeliers of dark iron, large circular rings that two of them overall light to the inside of the building. You can see a staircase immediately to the left of a front desk region that leads to the secondary floor. Ultimately, you know, two stories, and you've seen a lot of, especially in the central cities, inns that will stack up multiple floors to try and best use the space they have for the plot. Because this is in the more affluent area and this may have been here for quite some time, it's a little more expansive. It's a much larger inn as far as the breadth of the portion of land that it takes up.

SAM: Is there one of those classy guys playing a piano in the lobby, or?

MATT: No, there isn't somebody in the inn playing a little--

TRAVIS: It's not a saloon, you dork.

(laughter)

ASHLEY: Just some muzak.

TRAVIS: Some muzak.

MATT: Yeah, exactly.

ASHLEY and MATT: (hum muzak)

MATT: Like a small saxophone version of Your Turn to Roll comes in. (laughter) You do see an attached doorway on the right that opens up into what you think is a tavern or dining hall of some kind. You smell food cooking, but it doesn't sound like it's busy yet, like they're preparing probably for an evening rush. At that front counter, you do see an elderly female dwarf, stark white hair that is braided thick and then wrapped around itself into this large bun that's about the size of the rest of her head. It almost gives like a halo behind the back of it, the way it frames the top. With every single wrinkle, you can see they're all placed by the wide smile that immediately comes across her face as she looks up to the rest of you and goes, "Yeah, can I help you?" (Sam laughing)

LIAM: I believe so, yeah.

MATT: "I'm Kela Camarouth, this is my cottage."

TRAVIS: Keller?

LIAM: Kela?

MATT: "Kela."

LIAM: Kela.

MARISHA: Keller.

SAM: Keller Kela.

LIAM: Kela Camarouth. Excellent, so this is your place, it's a family business.

MATT: "It is, my grandkids help out."

LIAM: Wonderful.

TRAVIS: (giggles)

LIAM: We are to be guests here, of the king and the Cerberus Assembly, I believe arrangements were made. We are The Mighty Nein.

MATT: "Right, right," she pulls up a small piece of paper with like a hastily scribbled note on it and goes, "Ah, yes, yes, this is already paid for, under the intent of the Assembly, so rooms have been arranged individually. Seven such chambers, keys to be, here you are," puts down like, seven really nice iron keys on the table. They're all intricately carved, and beautifully done, as opposed to rougher keys you find across most portions of your travels.

MARISHA: Wow. We're at that point in our career.

SAM: Wow.

TRAVIS: Yeah, we be come ups. Started at the bottom. Look where we is.

LIAM: I know I smell something delicious. Is food available to be served at the moment?

MATT: "Not at the moment, but it should be within about the next hour or so, if you hang around. You should see the crowds gathering around that time, so just keep a keen eye."

SAM: The rooms are taken care of, but what of, like, the incidentals? Are those taken care of also, or?

TALIESIN: Is there a wifi password, is what she's asking?

MATT: "No. If you would like to partake in the various food items provided, you would have to pay separately, but--"

SAM: I won't go crazy.

TALIESIN: Where do we clean up? I just learned a new word: ichor. Is that what this is?

SAM: Yes.

TALIESIN: I've had to learn new words for what happens to me now.

MATT: "You look like you've had quite a day."

TALIESIN: It's been quite a day. Let's clean up and have a meal, maybe.

TRAVIS: Yeah, that sounds lovely.

MARISHA: I guess we'll all meet down here in the lobby in what, 30 minutes or so?

SAM: Yeah, realistically more like 45.

MARISHA: Yeah, probably like 45, all right. Let's go.

MATT: "All right, I'll have the boys show up to your rooms here. "Yeeza, Poma!"

TRAVIS: Whoa.

MATT: She just screams out suddenly out amongst the tavern and you hear (quick footsteps), foots coming down the stairs, and you hear these two, can't be older than probably 16, dwarf boys come rushing down, pushing each other out of the way. "Yes, ma'am?" "Yes, Grandma? "Oh, hello, we're supposed to show you to your rooms, I think, right, right?" (Kela) "Take the keys and show them to their various chambers. Now! (clapping)" They're like, "Right!" "Right." And they grab, "This this way," and they're not making eye contact with you, they're (grumbling).

TRAVIS: Lead the way.

MATT: They lead you up--

MARISHA: Do we each need our own escort? This seems excessive.

TRAVIS: Armed what, armed escort, did you say? Or our rooms?

MARISHA: Keep going.

TRAVIS: Yeah, let them lead on, they're excited.

MATT: The two of them, once they leave the eye and the sight line and ear shot of the grandma, their shoulders slump a bit and they just go, "All right, here's your room, here's your room, here's your room," and they just show you around, getting the job done, baseline what's required.

TRAVIS: Well, hold on. Where did all your enthusiasm go? Tell us what your names were again.

MATT: They look at each other. "I'm Yeeza," he's like, I'm Poma."

TRAVIS: Pom.

MATT: "Poma."

TRAVIS: Poma, yes, of course. My apologies.

SAM: You're her grandkids, then?

MATT: "Yeah."

SAM: Are you compelled to work here?

MATT: "No, does it look like I'm compelled to work here?"

(Marisha laughing)

SAM: Are you just a teenager? Is that what's going on?

MATT: "No! I got a full beard."

SAM: Oh!

MATT: It's like scraggly and barely coming through.

SAM: I understand.

MATT: Like the early peach fuzz that just looks a bit too thin.

TRAVIS: It's quite majestic. Your grandmother's a wonderful person. Is there a lot of vacancy here this evening, or is it fairly full up?

MATT: "Oh, a few folks left after everything that went down earlier today. But you know, it's been pretty crowded, but we got you rooms, though."

TRAVIS: Oh, no--

MATT: "Is there a problem with the room, sir?"

TRAVIS: I was just curious how loud it is at night. I'm a fairly light sleeper.

MARISHA: I like him.

MATT: "I'll get you an extra pillow."

TRAVIS: An extra pillow would be great. Tuck it between my knees, helps align my spine at night.

MATT: "Sure, whatever floats your boat."

TRAVIS: Okay.

MATT: Runs off to grab you another pillow. The other dwarf's just standing there like, kicking the ground. "Need anything else?"

MARISHA: Yeah, do you have, like, little complimentary soaps? Some coffee, anything like that?

MATT: "Washroom's at the end of the hall."

MARISHA: Can you give me, like, a handful of free stuff?

MATT: Make a persuasion check.

(laughter)

TALIESIN: Can I give the opposite of, like-- Can I subtract a d4 from this?

TRAVIS: Anti-Bless?

MARISHA: Natural 20.

MATT: You cast Bane on--? What'd you roll?

MARISHA: Natural 20.

MATT: Natural 20!

MARISHA: Look, I speak punk-ass kid.

MATT: I know you do. The way you insinuate it, like he can tell in your vocal timbre, like--

MARISHA: Give me the good shit, man.

MATT: This is probably a fun girl to hang out with.

LIAM: He immediately hands her drugs.

MATT: "I mean, I can probably steal something, right? I mean, like you want soap, you said?"

MARISHA: Yeah, maybe those little bottles of booze, you know, that they give you sometimes?

LIAM: Do they do that, though?

MARISHA: I don't know. In canon. (laughing)

MATT: "I'll have to ask my grandma."

MARISHA: No, you don't, right? Why do you have to ask her?

MATT: "I'd have to ask my grandma."

MARISHA: Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

TRAVIS: You're going to get these guys killed.

TALIESIN: Don't understand what's happening.

MATT: And he rushes off.

LIAM: Want to join The Mighty Nein?

(laughter)

SAM: Wow! That was cool.

MARISHA: This free shit, you know. They got that overhead built in, you know?

TALIESIN: Genuinely don't understand what's happening.

SAM: I mean, teenagers don't think anything's cool. That one thought you were pretty cool.

MARISHA: Yeah, fucking look at me. I'm covered in fucking blood.

TRAVIS: Speaking of which, who is the most disgusting amongst us? Who's up first?

TALIESIN: I got swallowed.

ASHLEY: I haven't had a shower in so many months.

TRAVIS: Oh, shit, really?

ASHLEY: I mean--

TALIESIN: I think you've won first.

SAM: Yeah.

ASHLEY: Oh, I mean, I didn't mean-- I figured--

TALIESIN: (tsking) Nope, nope.

TRAVIS: Wow, go, please, for the love of the gods, get in there.

ASHLEY: Couldn't you tell? (laughing)

MATT: While you're having this conversation, you hear from behind you, "I'm going first!" and Jester just runs to the washroom.

(laughter)

TRAVIS: That's fair.

TALIESIN: I'm just going to leave her bag of taffy in her room, for the next however many hours it takes.

MATT: So four of you guys are facing the front, in which case as you go into your chambers, they're very nice chambers. They're on size pretty similar to like the Pillow Trove in Zadash, it reminds you of that locale. The Pillow Trove is lighter as far as the decor and the sheets, and everything that was placed around here. This place has more of a earth tones to it. It feels like it's trying to aim for rustic, but it's a little too nice for rustic, so it can't quite find its, you know, its theming.

TALIESIN: Lord Hilton.

MATT: Kind of, yeah! But aside from a window, there is a double door, glass door that opens out onto a balcony.

LIAM: On each room, you said?

MATT: On each room, and the three that are facing the other direction face out into a garden that sits in the exterior on the back end of the actual cottage.

LIAM: Caleb takes a front-facing.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: You sure?

LIAM: Yes.

MARISHA: Feels a little exposed, don't you think?

TRAVIS: I'll do it as well. Take the room next to his.

TALIESIN: Nott, will you take the third room on that side?

SAM: Yes, please.

MARISHA: I'll take the fourth, then.

TALIESIN: Fifth.

SAM: Well, there's only four.

TALIESIN: Oh, only four, I'll be on the other side, then.

(laughter)

SAM: Good decision.

TALIESIN: Yeah. What's happening?

MATT: You guys choose your individual chambers, and you can take some time to make the space your own. But the rest of the evening is yours.

LIAM: For that hour of time, or 45 minutes, which is really going to be an hour.

SAM: Realistically.

LIAM: Caleb will spend a minute wiping blood off of his face and then bring up Frumpkin and sit in a chair and just stare out at the city, and just scritch Frumpkin, and remember.

MATT: All right.

TALIESIN: Is there a time for short rest in this, or is this not short rest material?

MATT: If you guys are taking about an hour.

(laughs)

TALIESIN: It's going to be an hour, there will be a shower involved, or whatever.

MATT: Then yeah, you can take a short rest.

LIAM: When you say an hour, it's probably more like an hour 15.

TALIESIN: Hour and a half.

MATT: There you go.

MARISHA: Know what, I'll just see you guys at dinner.

TALIESIN: I'll see you at the bar after.

MARISHA: See you at the bar.

MATT: Say 10 and make it our beeswax to be there.

TRAVIS: Oh, beeswax.

TALIESIN: No faffing.

MATT: So. The hour goes by, those of you that wish to take a short rest to heal up, hit dice wise, a bit.

TALIESIN: I will also do the same thing for--

MARISHA: Wait, what am I doing?

LIAM: Jeez.

TALIESIN: Just assume she's rolling the same way I am.

LIAM: Worst.

TALIESIN: My own fault.

TRAVIS: Ooh, I get 10. ♪ Hallelujah ♪

(Matt laughs)

SAM: This short rest brought to you by, I don't know.

MATT: Idle Champions.

SAM: Idle Champions.

MATT: There you go.

SAM: So we meet down for dinner, I assume.

MATT: Mm-hmm. The meals here are pretty nice. We'll say, for standard across the board for the evening's meal and drink, unless you're providing or asking for any specific upper shelf alcohol of any kind, it'll probably put you at about, we'll say, about six silver a person to eat for the night.

TALIESIN: I'll take that.

SAM: You're going to pay for all of us? Thank you.

TALIESIN: Yeah, how much does that total, then? Six per person?

SAM: Six times seven.

TALIESIN: Times seven.

LIAM: 42.

TALIESIN: 42 silver.

SAM: That's nothing.

TALIESIN: I'll just put in a gold in for tip. I'll just do that.

LIAM: We used to con people for silvers.

MATT: All righty.

SAM: It's true.

MARISHA: Are we alone? Is there anyone else in the restaurant?

MATT: It's not terribly busy. You see, maybe, eight other patrons that have come through. You guys definitely stand out amongst a lot of them. Many of them appear to be very well dressed. They could be traveling merchants, they could be, you know, family of nobles that there was no space to stay in. You're uncertain, but they all look to be definitely at least a middle or upper class type presentation, whether or not they actually, you know, exist and live that lifestyle, they're definitely presenting as such. But you don't have quite the spread of dynamic outfits and figures that your group does. And so no matter where you sit, you stick out a little bit, and every time you look up and look around, there's a few eyes on you. But as is the nature of this type of upper crust social experience, as soon as that eye connection happens, (clearing throat).

TALIESIN: Is anybody giving us a funny funny look, or is it just--

LIAM: Yeah, by a check of the room, is anybody--

SAM: See Invisibility.

LIAM: Paying too much attention?

MATT: Make an insight check.

TALIESIN: 19.

LIAM: Hmm. 16.

MATT: All right. You do see one person that is dressed in nice traveling attire with a bit of an under set of basic leather armor. But the kind you see people who are willing, or taking long trips along trade routes and main roads to where, and they've pretty much been eating alone and just keeping an eye on you.

TALIESIN: All right.

SAM: So.

TRAVIS: It's so hard to feel like you belong in places like this. I always feel like I'm pretending.

MARISHA: What, fancy places?

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MARISHA: Yeah, agreed.

SAM: Yasha.

ASHLEY: Yeah?

SAM: Did you take your bath?

ASHLEY: Yes.

SAM: Because this thing's still there. Is that, it's always there?

ASHLEY: This is a tattoo.

SAM: Oh, I just thought that-- I don't know what I thought, I just--

TRAVIS: She was a messy eater?

SAM: Yeah, maybe.

TRAVIS: Oh.

SAM: Like a coffee stain or something?

ASHLEY: No, that's just a part of my face. (laughter) I made it a part of my face.

SAM: Oh, okay.

ASHLEY: I wasn't born that way.

SAM: Hey, welcome back to Yasha, I guess, right?

ASHLEY: Yeah. It feels weird to, just this morning I was not fully myself, and now I am.

SAM: And you got revenge for the one who did this to you, which was pretty badass.

ASHLEY: I don't know if that's the word I would use, but, yes.

MARISHA: Wait, revenge or badass?

ASHLEY: Badass, I guess, and revenge. All of it.

MARISHA: Oh.

TRAVIS: Doesn't feel that way?

ASHLEY: It feels weird. It feels like it's not finished, and part of it feels like it wasn't enough. (Ashley sighs)

LIAM: Well, I don't think 12 hours are going to roll back months of pain.

ASHLEY: I think you might be right, Caleb.

SAM: Do you think he's gone? Obann, for real?

ASHLEY: It seemed like it. I mean, I think if someone is goopy, maybe they're gone.

TRAVIS: Seems like that he might be.

MARISHA: (gasps) Ooh!

TALIESIN: Finally Jester comes down.

LIAM: Wow, you really took a shower.

MATT: Talk about making an appearance.

LAURA: Yeah!

SAM: Oh my god.

LIAM: Wow.

LAURA: Hi, buddies.

MATT: Hey, Laura.

LIAM: Why didn't we all bathe upstairs?

ASHLEY: Only one of us bathed.

LAURA: Hi.

SAM: I'm married to that! Oh wait, no, I'm not.

LAURA: Oh wait.

(laughter)

TRAVIS: Hi.

LAURA: Hi, baby.

TRAVIS: You look beautiful.

LAURA: Thank you.

LIAM: Aww.

LAURA: Hi.

SAM: Did you win?

LAURA: They haven't announced my category.

SAM: You just left?! You just left before your category?

LAURA: Well, I saw on Twitter that you were using my dice.

SAM: I wasn't using your dice!

LAURA: Somebody said my dice was in front of you--

SAM: That's a joke, I would never touch your dice without you here.

LAURA: Well, I had to come.

TRAVIS: How did you get here so fast?

LAURA: Dude, there was no traffic. It was so weird.

MATT: Priorities.

SAM: If, for your your category--

MATT: I love it.

LIAM and MATT: Respect.

SAM: For your category, will you just go back real quick?

LAURA: Yeah, I'm just going to go. Like, so let me know, chat room, if I win.

(laughter)

SAM: The music will just be playing.

MARISHA: Yeah, if you win, you have to give it--

LAURA: I went to the bathroom. I did, though, and then I--

MATT: It's okay, as long as nobody knows and there's no proof that you--

LAURA: There's no way that you'll know.

LIAM: We could just film an acceptance speech on an iPhone. We'll just send it over.

SAM: iPhone? We're broadcasting live; she could do an acceptance speech live.

LAURA: If I win, I'll give an acceptance speech here. For sure.

MATT: With a slight delay.

LAURA: Yeah.

(laughter)

SAM: I think we all admire your priorities.

TALIESIN: Seriously, not even kidding.

LAURA: I love you guys.

MATT: We love you, too.

TRAVIS: We were just talking to Yasha about how it's to be free in the last few months.

MARISHA: We basically showered and now we're having dinner.

LAURA: Oh. I'm so glad I'm clean now.

(laughter)

LIAM: We are the Camarouth Cottage.

LAURA: Yes, obviously.

LIAM: Squaring things away.

SAM: And Yasha was explaining that she has some mild sort of PTSD.

MARISHA: Talking to Jester like she just came out of a coma.

LAURA: I don't remember anything that just happened.

TRAVIS: Yasha, I meant to ask, since it has been months, is there anything that you need to do? Anyone you need to notify or follow up on?

ASHLEY: No.

TRAVIS: Oh.

ASHLEY: I think the only people that I would've need to have notified are you guys and Molly, so, that's just you guys.

SAM: Well, even before all this began, you know, sometimes you would stare out into the night and yearn to be somewhere else. Is that still part of your MO? Like, are you going to disappear tomorrow morning?

TRAVIS: Is it raining right now?

MATT: It is, yeah. Faintly. It's not as strong as it was earlier today.

ASHLEY: I don't know. I mean, I feel like I just, we'll see if I can feel a little more-- I don't know, I feel like nowhere feels like home, so, at least not yet, maybe that will change.

MARISHA: We have a great keep in Xhorhouse-- Xhorhas. We call it the Xhorhaus.

TRAVIS: ♪ Xhorhaus, in the middle of the ♪

ASHLEY: I haven't seen the mural in a while, and--

LAURA: Yeah.

ASHLEY: I haven't slept in a bed in a while, so that's going to be weird.

LAURA: Where did you sleep when you were with? Did you even sleep? You had camp, we spied on you.

ASHLEY: Yeah, just a lot of, you know, sleeping on the ground, which I guess I'm used to anyway, more so than sleeping in a bed.

MARISHA: What was sleeping like when you were under his control?

LAURA: Did you dream as yourself?

MARISHA: Yeah.

ASHLEY: I did. I feel like sometimes when I was sleeping, that was the only time where I felt like myself, which is weird, because, you know, my dreams would come through, or it just felt like, I felt like I was me for a while. Anyway.

TRAVIS: It's good to have you back.

ASHLEY: It's good to be back. Oh! I forgot. I'm going to take out 500 gold. You let me borrow this one time, and I said I was going to pay you back, but I didn't get a chance to. So--

TRAVIS: But that was for your bracers, wasn't it?

ASHLEY: Yeah, but we'll see what-- still, you let me borrow a $500. 500 gold, I mean. I don't know what dollars are.

TALIESIN: About one gold.

TRAVIS: Keep it. We've been earning a fair amount of money in your absence.

ASHLEY: I would feel uncomfortable if you didn't take it.

TRAVIS: I will take the money. Thank you.

SAM: Dinner's on Fjord.

LAURA: Yay!

TRAVIS: I tell you what, because I feel strange taking 500 gold from someone that's been mind controlled for several months. How about I'll give you a gift in exchange? And I will take out the book that Caleb gave me and I will hand it to Yasha.

MATT: Ah.

SAM: What's that? What's that book?

LAURA: Oh shit.

ASHLEY: What is this book?

LAURA: It's a really good book, Yasha.

SAM: Is that Tusk Love?

ASHLEY: What is it?

TRAVIS: Just give it a look before you go to sleep.

ASHLEY: It's a good book. Is it like a-- is there sexy times in it?

LAURA: I don't know.

LIAM: No, but it is right up your alley.

ASHLEY: Okay.

LIAM: It's a good choice.

MARISHA: We do have a good sexy time book.

LAURA: We could make sexy times in it. We could put whatever we want to.

ASHLEY: Maybe like add something on the side of the lines.

TRAVIS: Hmm, I don't know if you want to do that.

SAM: Add the words "in bed" to the end of the sentence.

LAURA: Yeah, that's really good.

ASHLEY: That is very kind of you, Fjord. I really, I mean, I do like to read, so. But it's such a short book. It's so small.

MARISHA: It's a flip book.

SAM: Well, should we start discussing what we're going to do with the whole getting the realms to talk to each other and everything?

LAURA: World peace and--

TALIESIN: I don't know if this is the time or place to do that right now.

LAURA: What, do you have something in your eyeball?

TALIESIN: I have a thing in my eyeball, yeah.

LIAM: I recommend we take a bottle of something up to one of our rooms and discuss it.

MARISHA: Those punk-ass kids should be bringing me something.

SAM: Oh.

MARISHA: It better be fucking good.

LAURA: What, what?

SAM: Oh, while you were bathing, we met some teens, some sullen teens, and Beau hit it off with them really great.

MARISHA: Yeah, they're pretty cool. They were very refreshing, actually.

SAM: They said that they would steal something from the hotel for her.

MARISHA: Yeah.

LAURA: Anything in particular?

SAM: They didn't specify, but she asked for booze. MARISHA: I asked for good shit.

LAURA: Oh, nice.

MARISHA: Yeah. Kind of to challenge them a little bit. You know, it was like, "How cool are you, you know, man?" It's really good tactic for manipulating young people.

LAURA: If they succeed and they're really good are you going to get them into the the--

SAM: The cool party?

LAURA: No, like, you can make them a monk or something.

TALIESIN: I'm conflicted on how proud I'm supposed to be about this. Having a very difficult time gauging.

ASHLEY: It was almost as if you were, like, speaking a different language to each other, and I couldn't understand. It was like, lots of words were missing in sentences.

TRAVIS: Yeah, I just wanted to chase you off of my front yard or something.

MARISHA: Basically, just, like, kind of get rid of all consonants and just, like, blur a lot of shit together. (laughter)

ASHLEY, MARISHA, and LAURA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Fluent.

LAURA: I'm uncomfortable.

SAM: Did you bring some sweatpants?

LAURA: I wish.

(Matt chuckling)

TALIESIN: May have some-- oh, well.

MATT: At the break, just run to Target.

LAURA: Yeah, maybe I'll just run to Target.

TRAVIS: Caleb. Haven't really had a moment to gauge your feelings about how all of that went. He called you by your real name.

LIAM: Why don't we go up to my room? All of us.

TRAVIS: Sure. I will cast See Invisi-- nope, I don't have that. We haven't rested. Oh, I took a short rest, See Invisibility!

MATT: Does that come back on a short rest?

TRAVIS: It does not.

MATT: So you do not cast it.

TRAVIS: So I do this stupid hand gesture and pretend like something happens.

MATT: Okay.

(Travis gasping) (Matt laughing)

TRAVIS: Okay.

MATT: You guys are following Caleb to his room?

SAM: Yes. Oh no.

TRAVIS: Fucking damn.

LAURA: What?

SAM: Jester was just robbed of something.

LAURA: No, I wasn't, stop.

SAM: She was robbed!

LAURA: No, I wasn't.

SAM: Someone else got the thing that she should have gotten.

LAURA: No. (laughing)

ASHLEY: No.

LAURA: That's good, that's real good, you guys. It would have been real bad.

TRAVIS: What's the name of this thief?

SAM: Some sort of mad person.

TRAVIS: A mad person?

(laughter)

LIAM: It would have been real bad.

LAURA: It would've been real bad. Yeah. So it's probably for the best.

TALIESIN: Oh my god, I can't believe you.

LIAM: A calculated risk you took.

(laughter)

TRAVIS and ASHLEY: Yeah.

TRAVIS: There would've been much pooping in that chair.

LAURA: Yeah. Ooh! Oh no!

LIAM: Not that dress. (strains)

SAM: It's like the end of The Sound of Music, where "The family Von Trapp! "The family Von Trapp!"

(laughter)

"The Von Trapp family! "No?"

MATT: It does fuck up Mads coming for the second half as Trent. That was my plan. (groaning and laughter) Plans are fucked up now on that.

TRAVIS: You said it out loud, Matt.

MATT: I know.

TRAVIS: You said it out loud. You know what happens when you say things out loud.

MATT: I know, stop making wishes. They have a tendency to come true these days in a very Monkey Paw way.

TALIESIN: Curse you, Monkey Paw.

MATT: You guys go ahead and follow Caleb up to his chambers, and spacious room. Each room is slightly different and has its own personality, though it is generally similar. You all go into the chamber, close the door behind you, and you're fairly certain you have some element of privacy.

LIAM: We have a lot to talk about.

LAURA: Should we search the room for like, you know, people spying on us and stuff?

TRAVIS: I'll use Divine Sense and see if there's anything around.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: Boop.

MATT: You concentrate for a moment and extend your senses. You know, as you focus, you can smell. The normally perfumed interior of the room fades to the smell of a fresh breeze and an earthy scent as you feel the Wildmother expanding your consciousness into the space. You don't pick up anything fiendish or anything undead.

LIAM: I'll also just-- go ahead.

TALIESIN: No, you go first.

LIAM: Just eyeball the room, make sure that I don't see anything.

MATT: Perception check please.

TALIESIN: I'll use a Detect Magic once the doors are closed, just to keep an eye on everything to go look around, see if anything's giving me an itch.

MATT: Okay. What'd you roll?

LIAM: Just an eight.

MATT: An eight. Glancing on the chamber, it looks like a standard chamber. You cast Detect Magic. Aside from all of you guys that just glow like Christmas trees.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: There is the oil lantern, the oil lamp that's over by the bed that is the central source of light in the room, does have its own glow. As you approach and look over at it, you can see that it is not an actual flame, it is a small glowing orb, it is a magical lamp.

LIAM: Actually, just a quick look around is not good enough for me. I'm going to take 10 minutes to methodically search this room for anything.

MATT: Okay, make an investigation check.

SAM: Seeing him do that, I will also assist in that.

TALIESIN: If I turn off the light, does it continue to have a Detect Magic-- yeah, no, that wouldn't change anything, never mind.

TRAVIS: Is he always like this when he prepares to sleep?

SAM: Yeah, we haven't been in a lot of hotels, so, you know, he just wants to make sure that he knows where to fold the clothes and where the extra robe is.

MATT: What'd you roll?

LIAM: 25.

TRAVIS: He likes to unpack?

LAURA: I'm going to jump on the bed while they're doing it.

LIAM: Caleb is like-- Oh, Caleb's arm just got caught under the mattress as he was searching it.

LAURA: Sorry.

SAM: Oh!

LAURA: Hold on, let me jump up. There you go.

(laughter)

MATT: Going around the chambers, they seem fairly devoid of any specific traps or dangerous implements.

TRAVIS: Is there a chair in the room?

(laughter)

MATT: There is.

LAURA: Oh no!

TRAVIS: Kill it with fire.

MARISHA: (slamming)

TRAVIS: Okay! That'll come out of our--

MARISHA: No, I don't do that.

LIAM: (fireball explosion)

TRAVIS: Fireball.

(laughter)

LIAM: The roof erupts out on the street.

MATT: That would turn the campaign in a very weird direction. Yeah, the room seems relatively safe. It is the wonderful Caleb experience of everyone rushing into the room going, "Okay, so Caleb, what's going on?" 10 minutes of him circling the room as you all just like--

TRAVIS: (whistling)

LAURA: (humming)

TALIESIN: Welcome back.

LIAM: Very on brand.

LAURA and MATT: Yeah.

SAM: Well, now that that's settled, what's our play here? Do we do we go across, do we go-- Where can we teleport? We can't teleport to Xhorhas, can we?

LAURA: Yeah.

MARISHA: Yeah, we can.

LIAM: We could go to the Dynasty.

SAM: We can? Yes, we can.

MARISHA: We can.

SAM: But to what end? We just walk in and say, "Hey, King Dwendal wants to talk to you."

LIAM: Well, we're getting ahead of-- I don't even know where to begin. We have a meeting with the Martinet tomorrow, yeah, correct. They have some idea of what they want to do. I don't know if they're going to be open to a counter idea.

MARISHA: Are we going to get access to this beacon? What if the whole thing is, like, a red herring or Trojan horse or a fake?

LAURA: What if the beacon is, like, trapped or something, and they're waiting, they've like done something to it so the minute that goes back to the Dynasty, it explodes in the Bright Queen's--

MARISHA: Absolutely.

SAM: We're not taking it back to the Dynasty. This is a upon successful meeting, right?

TRAVIS: Yeah, sure, we're supposed to broker some sort of meeting between the two. Did not establish on this ground or theirs, neutral or otherwise. This is entirely rigged to be a trap.

TALIESIN: Hmm.

MARISHA: We have to get-- huh?

LAURA: Hmm?

LIAM: I was agreeing with Fjord.

SAM: You said we were meeting with the Martinet. I thought we were supposed to be meeting with Trent Ikithon, no?

LIAM: No, Martinet.

TRAVIS: Da'leth.

SAM: Oh, sorry.

LIAM: Da'leth, yes.

SAM: Oh, okay.

LIAM: The head of the Assembly. TRAVIS: Speaking of Trent, he did see Caleb. He called him by his real name. He seemed very calm about that. How do you feel? What do you want to do? Are we going through with this?

LIAM: You know, I have spent a long time imagining how seeing him again would go, and I did not imagine... that. (nervous laugh) I spent years avoiding... that, and we just walked in. I-I-I have imagined choking the life from that man a lot, and I think we need to work with him?

SAM: Will you be able to?

ASHLEY: I am not comfortable with that idea, knowing how that feels. But--

LIAM: Well, there is a lot at stake right now, and we are surrounded by an entire city of armed guards and the king's will. But I don't know what to believe. They said that they just found this beacon. We know that that is almost certainly horse shit. They did not just find a beacon. It's hard to know who knows what. It's hard to know if the King knows what the Assembly knows. It's hard to know what the Assembly knows.

MARISHA: Absolutely.

LIAM: I don't know what Ikithon's intentions are. I don't know if they are in unison within the Assembly.

MARISHA: Hmm.

LIAM: It's hard to feel safe here.

TALIESIN: It is hard to feel safe here.

MARISHA: Well, we're not safe here.

TRAVIS: There is something to be said for playing the game, taking this a few pieces down the road.

LIAM: I honestly don't think we have much other choice.

MARISHA: We've done it successfully before. We did it in Xhorhas. Now we have to do it again.

LIAM: And what other option is there? We will end up in a prison cell, or dead.

TALIESIN: Considering how the last 24 hours went, I feel pretty comfortable saying if he looks at you sideways, we will not leave enough of him to be found.

MARISHA: We have to work--

LAURA: We could just do that, we could just kill him, chop him up into little tiny pieces, and then we escape to Xhorhas and we never come back!

TALIESIN: I suppose what I meant is--

LAURA: Here.

TALIESIN: We're going to try and keep you safe, and I think we can, is what I meant.

LAURA: Oh.

TALIESIN: I mean, but we could do, you know.

TRAVIS: Wow.

TALIESIN: I'm not against that, either.

LIAM: Caleb is flashing back to the boat when Jester just sunk an axe into a dude's head.

MATT: Yep. And he just screamed.

MARISHA: Hmm. We do have Jester's option, worst case scenario.

SAM: Sounds pretty dangerous.

LIAM: I appreciate both sentiments, honestly, but we don't know what circumstances we're dealing with yet, and he is certainly not alone. Just the one man is very powerful, and he has a network of people.

TALIESIN: Our goal is going to be getting you out of this city no matter what, though. As long as you know that, that that's really beyond anything, at least for me, is to make sure that you're not ending here, under any circumstances.

SAM: I guess one question I had, Lebby, is, aside from rendezvousing with the Martinet and figuring out how we're going to get out of here and what we're going to do in the grand scheme of things. Is there anything else in Rexxentrum that you want to know, you want to see, you want to visit while we're here? We have safe passage through the city, something that we've never had before. Even a check-in, a pass by, a drive-by? We could go for you.

LIAM: I'll think about it tonight.

MARISHA: Depending on what we hear from the Martinet, we might be on a tight timetable, though.

TALIESIN: We're going to need to know a lot. Even if it's not the truth, we're at least going to need to know what lie they want to tell. Where it came from, how they found it, what it would take to make this end on their end, what would be the things they would want to stop this.

LIAM: What I fear is we go to this meeting tomorrow and hear them out and hear what their intention is. Cannot take it at face value.

TALIESIN: No.

LIAM: We also probably cannot turn it down.

TALIESIN: And I doubt that the Bright Queen will be so foolish as to take it at face value either, and she'll understand that we're telling her what we heard.

LAURA: Will she?

TALIESIN: Yes, of course.

SAM: Yes, and she won't be foolish enough to just meet with someone face to face. She might astral project herself into the meeting or something.

LAURA: She can do that?

SAM: I don't know, she can live a million years.

TRAVIS: I would remind us all that the last time we were in Xhorhas, we were being watched. I would assume that was by someone in the Dynasty, not here. So if they were watching while we were in that room.

LAURA: They already know everything.

TRAVIS: Could be.

LIAM: It might not be a bad idea to, Jester, to contact one of our friends there.

LAURA: The Bright Queen?

LIAM: Yes, or Essek.

LAURA: That's what I said. Oh boy.

LIAM: And they are not going to trust the Empire at face value either. But at least for our own standing with them, to appear to be on the up and up with them.

LAURA: So what would I say, like, what would I say?

TRAVIS: To Essek?

LAURA: Yeah. Like: Hey, we met with King Dwendal, they say they have a beacon and they want to make peace. Do you guys want to meet up with them maybe? Coffee?

TALIESIN: I think that that might be too much. I even would just say we are, through circumstances, meeting with the Empire, we'll let you know in person.

MARISHA: I don't know if we want to put any of this through a Sending spell. This seems like a thing that can be misconstrued with--

TALIESIN: We need to do this in person.

MARISHA: 25 words.

LAURA: I could send multiple Sending messages.

TRAVIS: Wouldn't it be great if we could meet Essek somewhere that's not all the way in the Dynasty? He's quite powerful. Perhaps if we said we have a lead on that item that you asked us to track down, could we meet somewhere?

LAURA: Somewhere neutral, like Traveler Con.

TRAVIS: We are not in the Dynasty anymore.

TALIESIN: Or on the way.

MARISHA: Well, why don't we go back to... ♪ The cold mountain town where the elves were ♪ ♪ Where we met Reani ♪

MATT: Uthodurn?

MARISHA: Uthodurn.

LAURA: Oh, we do have a way to transport there.

TALIESIN: Uthodurn or--

MATT: You do.

LIAM: Yeah, however, if we show up tomorrow, there is no guarantee that they're not just going to march us off to whatever their means of transportation is. We have no idea what is going to happen once we walk through that door and begin that conversation.

MARISHA: We're just meeting with the Martinet, right? It's just him?

LIAM: The most powerful mage in the Empire.

TALIESIN: If their plan had been to imprison us and kill us--

SAM: They would've done it already.

TALIESIN: Two hours ago would have been an amazing time to do it.

TRAVIS: We need to be emphatic.

LIAM: I'm not saying they're going to drop us on the spot, but we are going to start moving on a path that we might not fully approve of.

TRAVIS: I think we're all of the same mind, though, that we should try and fight that. Implore them, educate them on why that is not the best way to reach their goal, yes?

MARISHA: I think Fjord's right here. Like, beyond what King Dwendal said of us standing on the boundaries of being traitors. I think we have to steer this.

TRAVIS: And certainly, it might not be our choice. I know what Caleb is getting at, but I think we should try every resource we have.

LIAM: I just don't think that we should show up with the Empire, with no advanced warning to them.

MARISHA: No, not at all.

TALIESIN: No, we need to go by ourselves.

MARISHA: We would go by ourselves and confer with Essek.

LIAM: If that's what they approve.

MARISHA: Well, that's what we were talking about, though. We're going to have to have some ultimatums, or else this isn't going to work.

LAURA: What if we give them the ultimatum and they're like, "No," and then they're like, "Do it right now the way we say, or you all die?"

TRAVIS: You go with these two people and they will take you.

TALIESIN: Then we--

LAURA: Yeah, what do we do?

SAM: Do we have any bargaining chips?

LAURA: Ooh, what if they try to do that, and instead of taking them to Xhorhas, we can just, you just make a circle to go somewhere else that we know, and then the minute we get there, we ditch them. SAM: We kill them.

LAURA: Or we cut them up into tiny pieces.

TALIESIN: Or we just leave.

SAM: Just a couple guards, in our hypothetical.

TALIESIN: I can totally see how I am partly responsible for this current mode of thinking.

MARISHA: Look, it's going to be a negotiation, it's a discussion, right? I just think we just, we don't go over as pushovers, right?

TRAVIS: Agreed.

MARISHA: So, okay. Maybe we need to have some hard lines.

LAURA: Okay.

MARISHA: Things we won't budge on. You know?

LAURA: One!

SAM: We're not going anywhere today.

LAURA: Two!

TRAVIS: We're not going supervised.

LAURA: Three!

MARISHA: We are not going until we see the beacon ourselves in person.

LAURA: Oh, that's a big one, that's a really big one.

SAM: That's a big ask.

MARISHA: We have no proof that they actually fucking have it!

LAURA: That's true.

TRAVIS: I like it, I like it.

LAURA: Four!

TALIESIN: We're also going to want to know what they actually want. What kind of demands, even if we're not going to be representing them, we need to know that they actually want something. If they don't want something, what's the point of doing this? They want an end to the war, what does that mean? What do they want out of it? What kind of guarantee?

LAURA: I feel like that one's a squiggly line. That's less of a hard line. It's like an up and down kind of, but it's definitely--

TRAVIS: Jester, how about 1000 platinum.

LAURA: Five: 1000 platinum.

TRAVIS: Yep!

SAM and LAURA: Six!

SAM: They should cover incidentals at our hotel. I'm just saying.

LAURA: Totally. Seven, also like, do they have--

SAM: Yasha, do you want anything? I mean, we're just asking for stuff now.

ASHLEY: Wait, but I--

SAM: Chocolate?

ASHLEY: Because it's-- Well, yeah, I like chocolate, so that should definitely be high on the list.

LAURA: Okay, seven is chocolate. Eight is--

TRAVIS: What about--

SAM: These are lower priority.

MARISHA: I feel like I need to write this down.

TRAVIS: What about some armaments? What if they have some--

ASHLEY and LAURA: Almond mints?

TRAVIS: (stammering) Armaments.

TALIESIN: Almond mints?

SAM: But we're not going into battle.

ASHLEY: Like Andes mints?

TRAVIS: Are we not? Are we not engaging on dangerous business for the Empire? Perhaps they have some items and things that might help us in our quest.

LAURA: I'm losing track of the numbers.

MATT: (knocking)

TALIESIN: We may, oh.

ASHLEY: I have a question, because it is--

MARISHA: Wait, was that a knock at the door?

MATT: Caduceus and Beauregard, you hear a knock, but it's not at this door, it's at two doors down.

MARISHA: Oh shit, it's my kids, it's my delivery. I'll be right back, I'll be right back.

TRAVIS: No, it's not, is it? (laughter)

MARISHA: No wait, I just, I peek out the door.

MATT: You peek out, and you see the dwarf kid you spoke to earlier is like down at your room going like--

TRAVIS: Sup, sup bro.

MARISHA: Hey, psst, psst.

MATT: Comes over.

MARISHA: Wait! Shh shh, stop right there. Go, just--

MATT: He drops this little bag on the ground.

(Sam laughing)

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: And then just heads off downstairs.

MARISHA: (quick footsteps)

TRAVIS: It's full of poop.

MARISHA: Yeah, what is it? Before I-- Is it full of poop?

LAURA: Oh, it's another poop bag!

MATT: A tiny square glass vial with a cork in it. It's like a dark brown glass.

LAURA: What the shit is that?

TRAVIS: He poured out his dad's bourbon stash.

MATT: It's his grandma's special personal liquor.

TRAVIS and LAURA: Oh!

TRAVIS: In a perfume bottle.

MATT: It's some strong dwarven shit.

TRAVIS: Yeah, yeah. (laughing)

MARISHA: Oh yeah, it's the good shit. Oh yeah.

SAM: Give me some of that!

MARISHA: Just a sip, do not-- you're going to go last.

LAURA: I don't want, thank you.

TRAVIS: Yeah, of course, yeah. (coughs)

MATT: (knocking) There's a knock on the door.

SAM: Uh-oh.

LAURA: Which one, ours?

TRAVIS: Tell the fucking kids to go away. We're trying to collaborate here.

MARISHA: Does it sound like the--

SAM: Oh, I ordered room service.

MARISHA: Did it sound like the same knock?

MATT: It did.

LAURA: Who is it?

MATT: No response.

MARISHA: I peek it open.

MATT: "Hey. Sorry to bother you. I noticed you work for the Cobalt Soul."

MARISHA: Yeah, man. Yeah, I do, what's up?

MATT: "That's pretty cool."

MARISHA: Yeah. Yeah, it is.

TRAVIS: Do you want to go to prom?

(laughter)

MATT: "Anyway, I did you a favor."

MARISHA: All right.

MATT: "Bye." Leaves.

MARISHA: Hey, man.

MATT: "What?"

(laughter)

MARISHA: For your trouble, this is-- This is official Cobalt Soul sanctioned shit. I could get in trouble if any of these are caught outside of the hands of any of the members of the Cobalt Soul, all right? So don't fucking get in trouble with this, all right?

MATT: "All right."

MARISHA: And I just give him a couple of my ninja stars.

(laughter)

MATT: You watch his face go...

MARISHA: Don't fucking, don't, dude, be fucking cool, man.

MATT: Like hides them, and is like (winces) you notice like accidentally stab himself with one already, and is like (whimpers).

MARISHA: Also, don't fucking hurt yourself, man, I can't be responsible.

MATT: "No, I didn't hurt myself, it's fine, it's cool. It's cool."

MARISHA: All right.

TRAVIS: You're going to get them killed.

TALIESIN: A year from now, we're going to come back, the other kid's going to have an eye patch.

(laughter)

MATT: And he scrambles off.

LIAM: Was that a reenactment of the first time Matt and Marisha met?

(laughter)

MATT: Practically. Practically.

(laughter)

TRAVIS: Hey, be cool, be cool.

LIAM: She gave you some ninja stars.

MATT: That's when I knew. That's when I knew.

TRAVIS: (as Matt) Were you just carrying those? (as Marisha) Be cool, man.

MATT: Look, man, she grew up on the streets. She knows how to keep herself safe.

MARISHA: Those Kentucky streets. Those dirt and gravel streets.

MATT: Oh, don't tell me you didn't know kids in your Kentucky high school who carried ninja stars.

MARISHA: Oh man, are you kidding?

TRAVIS: Butterfly knives.

MATT: Yeah.

MARISHA: That's a lot of boredom.

MATT: Yeah, oh, I know. Anyway, the kid rushes off, excited, slightly in pain.

MARISHA: Fucking piece of shit kids, all right. (Laura laughing) Okay, hang on, I was writing--

LAURA: We were on nine.

ASHLEY: It's been a little bit of time, but whose side are you on?

SAM: Oh.

MARISHA: That's a good point.

TRAVIS: You mean us, collectively?

SAM: We've been playing both sides in order to achieve peace, actually.

LAURA: That's said really well.

TRAVIS: The Dynasty has quite a war they're waging against the Empire, and the same is true for the other side. This is actually the first instance of the Empire at least pretending like they want to find some way to a truce.

LAURA: Because the Dynasty is like, fuck them. It's going to be real hard.

TRAVIS: We have been given these little medallions that allow us to move amongst the Dynasty, similarly to how we are here.

SAM: And in all fairness, this gentleman we're meeting with, the Martinet, seems to be on the more trustworthy side of the spectrum, right? Ludinus?

TALIESIN: We'll see.

LAURA: Maybe.

SAM: I mean, his own assistant was betraying him, he seemed genuinely surprised.

TALIESIN: That is true.

MARISHA: Well, Caduceus, what was your point? Like goals, we need goals, was more or less the one liner?

TALIESIN: Yeah, we need to know, I mean--

LAURA: We need to know what they want.

TALIESIN: Know what they actually want, beyond like--

LAURA: They're not going to tell us that.

TRAVIS: No, they won't.

TALIESIN: Or at least a general idea, if they even know what they want. If they don't tell us what they want, then we at least need to know that they have some, that there is a world, that-- I've been thinking about when you're planting vegetables.

TRAVIS: Oh god.

TALIESIN: Hear me out.

MARISHA: Okay.

TALIESIN: And if you have two, you have two plants that need different things in the soil, and if they're going to not both grow at the same time and how you deal with that. And honestly, usually just one dies, and I have been trying to figure out what the answer to this is, it's very frustrating.

ASHLEY: But sometimes they compliment each other, if you have two different vegetables together.

TALIESIN: Sometimes if you plant the right things, but if two plants are fighting over a chunk of land, though, I've never known it to just stop being a problem.

LAURA: Sometimes they stop growing, fighting, and you can make them intertwine, and it turns into a really beautiful tree sculpture.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

LIAM: Well, I'm not--

LAURA: They do that sometimes in Nicodranas.

TALIESIN: At the very least, you could put some stones down sometimes and keep, you know, make some flower beds or something.

LAURA: Yeah, sometimes--

TRAVIS: What the fuck are you all talking about?!

(laughter)

MARISHA: Okay, hang on, hang on. I see what he's getting at, though. But--

TALIESIN: You do? Wow.

MARISHA: People have been cultivating and making plants work for us for thousands of years, man. But to your point--

TRAVIS: Are you stoned right now?

MARISHA: That dwarven shit is fucking strong. So you got to make the ground work for you, right? Like you said, the stones, the beds, sometimes you got to to make barriers.

TALIESIN: What does the kale need to grow, what do the potatoes need to grow? They got to each have what they need. No, this is good.

LIAM: I would like, for a moment, to move us away from a botany metaphor, and suggest that perhaps the one angle we could use is try to convince them that there is a greater threat than either of these nations. That's what we have been dealing with. It's the only thing that could pull them out of their own asses, perhaps.

LAURA: I feel like we, did we stop it though, for a while, at least, that part?

TRAVIS: Perhaps. I agree with Caleb, but only to the ends of seeing who might react to that sort of revelation. I feel like, I think we're in agreement here. These people we're going to meet with are part of this, yes? That the war is a distraction that someone in these meetings on the Empire side is hoping that no one knows that this is happening.

MARISHA: Also, it's incredibly strange that the Empire is now 100% in charge of cleaning up the mess from where the Chained Oblivion is being held under that temple, and are we just supposed to trust that? Like, now no--

TRAVIS: That's a good point.

TALIESIN: No, that's been worrying me.

MARISHA: You know.

LAURA: Number nine, the Empire is not solely in charge of cleaning up where the Unchained Oblivion was. We also get to be in charge of that.

TRAVIS: Hmm. No.

LAURA: Number 10: pastries?

MARISHA: Well, we already have--

LAURA: All of them at future meetings. Just to make sure that the meetings that we have with them are, like, catered.

MARISHA: Right, you want to have, right.

TALIESIN: We're going to have to find some neutral ground for this meeting, too.

LAURA: Maybe some cheese plates.

MARISHA: I will say, we already have chocolate as an incidental, so--

LAURA: Maybe peanut butter and jelly? Just surprise me?

MARISHA: Maybe they put it together? Can we have chocolate and pastries--

SAM: Well, here's a thing that we should strive for, maybe. We get to choose the meeting location. Maybe that could be a thing that we strive for?

LAURA: Number 11.

MARISHA: Wait, is that number, hang on, you skipped 10.

LAURA: No, I didn't, 10 was pastries.

ASHLEY: That was chocolate and pastries and cheese.

LAURA: Well, technically, seven was chocolate.

ASHLEY: Seven was chocolate, I'm sorry.

MARISHA: So wait, you want, we're confirming that chocolate and pastries are two different breakout incidentals. All right, okay, 10 is pastries.

SAM: Maybe we should just suss this out when we meet them tomorrow.

TALIESIN: We're going to hear a lot.

SAM: I think we've got a good plan here, guys.

TRAVIS: We've got a core set of deal terms. Can we please go to sleep?

LAURA: 11, we get to choose where we meet. Where it happens.

MARISHA: Okay, well hang on, I was changing nine, because the Empire is not in charge of cleaning up--

SAM: Nine was sort of a big ask. I don't think we're going to--

MARISHA: Okay, so we'll replace nine and do we choose meeting location, and then that gives us an even 10 incidentals, which is good.

TRAVIS: That's a shitload of asks. Just saying.

MARISHA: But you know how contract negotiation goes, Fjord. You always stack it, that way you can lose some.

TRAVIS: That's actually a myth. Okay. (laughter)

SAM: All right. Good night, everyone. Oh wait, we're still talking?

LAURA: Are we all sleeping in this room?

SAM: No, we have our individual rooms.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Are you all right on maybe--

LAURA: I don't like that we're separated. I feel like somebody's going to come while we're sleeping and try to steal Caleb away.

TALIESIN: Actually, it might be a good idea to have pairs and in the rooms, and not do the single rooms.

SAM: I volunteer to sleep next to Caleb.

MARISHA: I'm going to go to sleep in my own room. I'm right next door to those two, just, like, pound on the wall if you need me.

TALIESIN: Fjord?

TRAVIS: Yeah, sure. I'll room up.

LAURA: You don't want to... Yasha, do you want to be my roommate?

ASHLEY: Yeah, I will be your roommate.

LAURA: Okay.

ASHLEY: Yeah. Did you get, you have one of the garden rooms, right?

LAURA: Sure.

ASHLEY: I think--

SAM: You did.

ASHLEY: You did.

LAURA: Sweet. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

ASHLEY: Yeah, I will come in there.

LAURA: Okay.

MARISHA: Caduceus, you're flying solo?

TALIESIN: No, we're--

MARISHA: Oh.

TRAVIS: Just you.

MARISHA: Oh, I'm flying-- okay.

LAURA: I thought that's what you said you were doing, Beau!

MARISHA: Well, I just didn't want to sleep with them.

LAURA: Well then, sleep with me and Yasha!

MARISHA: All right, I'll sleep with you and Yasha.

LAURA: Okay.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

(laughter)

TRAVIS: As we were leaving, can I lean over to Caleb and say: If you want to finish this on a personal level, let me know. And I'll leave.

MATT: Okay. You all adjourn to your chosen bunk chambers, and bed down for the night, unless there's no other business to attend to.

LIAM: Silver wire around the room, across the window.

MATT: I assume at this point.

TALIESIN: ♪ Rest the long rest ♪

LAURA: I'm just going to take some ribbon and tie it across the doorway in case somebody opens it--

MATT: Good call.

LAURA: They can trip over the bottom.

MATT: There you go.

LAURA: Yeah.

ASHLEY: Should we put-- Do you have like-- Does Sprinkle have, like, a bell or something, or your thing? Your little animal, does it have to like dink-a-dink-a-dink?

TRAVIS: (as Sprinkle) No!

LAURA: No, but he can have one of my bells. I'm going to take a bell off of my--

SAM: [Inaudible]

ASHLEY: Should we connect the bell to the ribbon, in case you--

LAURA: Oh, you didn't want Sprinkle to have it on him, you want--

MATT: I just envision like--

ASHLEY: Well no, in case someone-- we would hear it.

LAURA: Okay, okay, okay, I'll tie the little bell onto the ribbon so that if anybody opens the door, it makes a jingling noise.

MATT: There you go.

TALIESIN: Before we go to sleep, yeah, no, go ahead. Oh yeah, before we go to sleep, I just want to, as we're setting up, because I'm going to probably sleep on the floor, because I like that. Did really well today.

TRAVIS: Thank you.

TALIESIN: Tomorrow's going to be hard.

TRAVIS: What do you mean?

TALIESIN: Well, I feel like you're going to be tempted into some old bad habits, and you've been doing really, really well, and we're going to be-- I feel like we're going to be tested, with our convictions and our truth. And I know we're going to have to lie, and I know we're going to have to be complicated in what truths we reveal, and I know that it's all in the end going to be to try and build a peace, but I just want to make sure that you remember where you are and how you became this person, and what it's worth.

TRAVIS: Thank you for saying that. Is it important to the Wildmother to be honest at all times?

TALIESIN: (sighs) You know, I don't know. I would say... Well, do you feel that nature is honest, or do you feel that nature can lie? And does nature lie?

TRAVIS: I think it can certainly be deceiving. Natural camouflage and colors and poisons and deterrents and all sorts of things. But it's also unyielding, it doesn't change for anyone.

TALIESIN: I never really thought of it that way. Well, I've been waiting on this. I'm going to reach into my pocket and I'm going to pull out this beautiful, ornate seal of the Wildmother that's done up in, where normally there's the wheat chaff, there's this seaweed ring that's been made out of copper that's gone blue and green to look like--

TRAVIS: Ooh! Sorry.

LAURA: (laughs)

TALIESIN: With with an iron spike through it, like an anchored spike, and then a blue in the center is like a blue wave crystal that gleams.

LAURA: That's really fucking cool.

TALIESIN: I mean, it's nice of you to ask me every now and then, but I don't really know if you need to that often anymore. You seem to have a handle on things.

TRAVIS: Where did this even come from?

TALIESIN: It was made at the forge.

LAURA: (gasps)

TALIESIN: I've been waiting for the right moment.

TRAVIS: Thank you.

TALIESIN: Thank you. You're on your way. You're already well on the path, and I think that the more that you look to yourself for some of these answers-- and I'm always happy to hear them-- I think you'll be finding that they're in there.

TRAVIS: Thank you for helping me. I'm really, really glad that we-- that our paths crossed.

TALIESIN: To divine intervention.

TRAVIS: To divine intervention.

TALIESIN: All right.

TRAVIS: I've got to find a dope-ass place for this thing. I weigh it carefully. Sword or chest?

MATT: (laughs) That's awesome. All right. Yeah, he's been planning that since the forge.

TALIESIN: Mm-hmm. Thank you for letting me do that way back when.

MATT: Of course, man. You all bed down for a long night's sleep, well earned after a very strenuous, emotionally and physically, day. As sleep comes to you, Yasha. The gentle sound of the rain fall against the window of the chamber lulls you into familiar slumber, and that place that had been your escape from your all-too-familiar imprisonment these past months comes to you once more. In this dream you're pushing through a dark, tight ravine surrounded by craggy rocks that are slick with rainfall. Your boots slip and sink into mud and rock, and you reach out and grab and pull yourself along, your muscles aching. You can hear behind you, in the distance, the rolling of thunder, flash of light above, and echoing through the cavern above you, your ears ringing from the impact again. Again, (thunder booming), again. You push forward up over an edge, breathing heavy, looking up, the rain spills against your face, causing you to wince over your eyes, and still ahead of you, all you see are clouds. It's too dark to make out. The path, it seems, is blocked by fog and darkness, but you push on through the pain. You continue to climb in distress, not knowing where it leads, but all you know is you have to climb, you have to climb, and you pull, and you stumble, and you fall back, and you hit the rock, and you feel the pain, the sharp, jabbing pain of one of the large spiked boulders in the side of this ravine stick into you, and you pick yourself back up and you keep pushing and keep pushing, and eventually, the rhythmic steps of your feet begin to match the beat of your heart. The rain begins to go from an intense typhoon to a gentle drizzle. The fog begins to pull away. The pain begins to subside, and the strength begins to return to you. As you watch the path begin to recede in its incline, you finally see yourself crest the top of this mountain. As you step to the edge of this cliff, you can see the storm ahead of you. Not a terrible torrent, but a welcoming rain. And it looks to be the light of a coming a sunrise just cresting over the horizon. You look down at the sides of your arms, your wet hand, and you can see the shackles, the metal, and there, dangling from them, are the broken chains that you failed to break once before. You look back up in the sky, you can see the roiling clouds themselves, the glowing, electric eyes of the entity that found you on the ship all those weeks before. No words, but a sense of pride and welcoming, and you sleep the best sleep you've had in a very, very long time. You all wake up in the morning.

SAM: Long rest!

MATT: Sore as fuck. But comfortably enjoying your morning here in this very, very nice establishment.

LAURA: While Yasha was sleeping, I wrote up some sexy pages of writing, and I put them in the back of the book that she's learning from, just so she has some good--

MATT: There you go.

(laughter)

MATT: All righty.

TRAVIS: We now know what Jester's career path is going to be.

SAM: Will you describe them, please?

(laughter)

LAURA: In vivid detail.

ASHLEY: I'm writing that on the back of this.

MATT: I do love the idea that there's a very select number of these arcane tomes that are all relics of the Age of Arcanum, that are one of the few artifacts that can physically alter a person's physiology and mental prowess permanently. It is a forgotten art form, and over time, there's just going to be many versions of them defaced permanently--

LAURA: (laughs)

MATT: --with perverse sketches and passages, I love it.

TRAVIS: Kama Sutra positions.

(laughter)

MATT: It's like all the old, you know, monk tomes with all the perverse shit in the margins. just grew bored of copying.

MARISHA: Trumpets in the asshole.

MATT: Yep.

MARISHA: They had things with putting trumpets in their butts.

MATT: Yeah, farts are funny. Even even back in the horrible middle ages. Farts were still funny.

LIAM: Butt jokes are eternal.

MARISHA: Yeah, man.

MATT: It's human nature.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: So you guys gather yourselves, head downstairs to be greeted by the smell of morning meal that is prepared. As you one by one begin to step down into the main chamber, you can see there is a figure sitting in a chair facing towards the stairway by the front door. It looks to be a man, human, in his late twenties, long, shoulder length black hair that's tucked behind his ears, a mustache that's thin. As soon as he sees you, he gets up and then leaves.

SAM: Oh. Should we trail him?

LAURA: Did he make eye contact with us at all, or he just saw us and left?

TRAVIS: He saw us.

MATT: He saw you. Stood up, not in a rush, but like stood up.

SAM: He's probably just reporting that we're up and about.

MARISHA: I want to, not follow him-follow him, but peek out the door after a moment and see which direction he went.

MATT: Okay. He went into the northeastern direction. You guys are on the southwest area of the Shimmer Ward, he's heading to the northeast.

TRAVIS: The Mud Top Ward?

LIAM: That's towards the center.

MATT: This is the Shimmer Ward.

TRAVIS: Yeah, I know.

MARISHA: Towards the center of the city.

MATT: And in the direction of where the castle terrace is.

LIAM: I think he said we were here, and that's north.

TRAVIS: Oh, there's a fucking map? Awesome, man.

LAURA: Who the fuck are you? Where you going? That's a Sending message.

MATT: Okay. To who?

MARISHA: Hey dick!

TRAVIS: I see you!

LAURA: Hey dick, come back here!

MARISHA: Piece of shit!

LIAM: Get your mullet back here, you asshole.

SAM: Were we supposed to go to a specific place to meet this gentleman? Or--?

MATT: You don't know.

SAM: They're coming to us. probably. Well.

MATT: You have breakfast. The meals are not included.

LAURA: (grumbling)

MATT: But in a similar route, it is five silver pieces per person for the breakfast, which is expensive, but not unheard of.

LAURA: This is going to add up.

TRAVIS: Five silver for breakfast?

MATT: Yeah. So all of you guys, it's about three and a half gold.

TRAVIS: Three gold and five silver.

MATT: Go for it.

SAM: We're going to go halfsies? No one's going to--

LAURA: No one's going to step up.

SAM: No one's going to take care of good old Nott over here?

ASHLEY: I'll get breakfast.

SAM: Thank you.

(laughter)

ASHLEY: You got it.

MATT: As you guys finish your meal, and probably Beauregard, anybody else who's keeping an eye on the vicinity, you can hear the heavy footfalls of a figure enter the central chamber of the cottage, which is on the other room, the entrance room, you guys are currently in the tavern chamber, which is separated by a wall, other than an open archway door. You see the shadow come in from the entryway, and a voice go, "Ahem."

MARISHA: Carry on.

MATT: You have to get up and go over to look through, but as you step and peek around the open archway, you can see there standing Martinet Ludinus Da'leth.

TRAVIS: Oh shit.

MATT: He's wearing his walking cloak over the rest of his clothes, this sleek, dark black, capelet with a long cloak behind it, and he has a cane, and is just there. Looks over and you hide, and his eyes immediately look over and find you. "Whenever you're ready."

MARISHA: Oh, hey man, what's up? We're just finishing breakfast. You want any coffee?

MATT: "I've already eaten, I appreciate it. But whenever you're ready, follow me, and we will begin our discussion."

MARISHA: All right, we're paying our bill, give us like five minutes.

MATT: He goes and sits down in the chair where the previous individual was sitting and waiting. (chuckles) All right. You guys finish your meal?

SAM: Yeah, yeah.

LAURA: Did you want to come sit at a table with us?

SAM: He said he already ate.

MATT: He's actually sitting in the main entryway of the cottage.

LAURA: Oh. (louder) Did you want to come sit over--?

MATT: "I'm all right."

TALIESIN: Herbal tea to go or anything?

MATT: "I'm fine, thank you."

MARISHA: I tried.

TALIESIN: Did you set your spells, by the way?

SAM: Take some bacon for the road.

MATT: All right, pocket bacon, good man.

SAM: Mm-hmm.

MATT: All righty. As you guys enter the next chamber, he stands. "Very well. Now, please follow. We will go to a place where we can have a conversation without prying ears or eyes." He turns and walks out into the fine cobblestone of the Shimmer Ward.

SAM: Is he alone? No guards?

MATT: No guards.

SAM: Wow. Bold.

LIAM: He's not sweating it.

MATT: You guys follow, and carry through the Shimmer Ward towards the castle, and you're like, oh, we're going to meet at the castle. You begin to hear the town criers have now begun to come to their daily travel and expression of the news as it is meant to be disseminated amongst the populace. You hear a female voice, young and very loud, crying out, "Dynasty incursion repelled by Imperial forces! King Dwendal claims his victory over failed attack on the capital!" You guys continue walking a bit further, and another bit of information creeps out, saying, "Freak lightning storm accident damages the Chantry Cathedral, repairs are underway!"

LAURA: (laughs)

SAM: Starting to think the news is not accurate.

(laughter)

MATT: You pass the castle terrace entrance. You bypass the gates on the southern side of it and head along the eastern side of the terrace outer wall, until eventually, you are northeast of the castle terrace, and you approach the dizzying sight of the Candles: eight scattered, un-uniform, and in some cases almost gravity-defying towers that dominate the sky above within this proximity. Some are crooked and holding at impossible angles while others seem to focus on sleek design and imposing height. You are led by Ludinus to a silver spire that sits taller than the rest. A monolith of shimmering stone with numerous balconies and external staircases that emerge and climb, then vanish into closed doors. The peak itself holds no roof. From what you can tell, however, it ends in a platform that is framed by four angled obelisks that almost meet in the center. You see no main door on the bottom floor, but as you approach the basin, Ludinus walks towards the front. A light that emits off of him seems to reflect off of the stone itself, and it gets extremely bright for a second, where you wince and squint your eyes, and you instinctually blink, and as soon as your eyes close and reopen, there's a door where previously there wasn't one. As Ludinus approaches, he puts his hand up, and it just (creaking) opens the inside of a dark interior.

LAURA: That was so cool!

TALIESIN: It was all right.

SAM: Don't be too forward. We're supposed to be, you know, negotiating position. Hard.

LAURA: Yeah, but I mean, that was a really cool spell.

SAM: Okay, but don't tell him that.

MATT: You guys follow suit?

LIAM: Yeah, I lead the way.

MATT: Okay. You step into the dark interior, where you see a number of leather chairs.

MARISHA: As we walk in, anybody, like, prying? Any neighbors? Any neighbors watching this happen?

MATT: Make a perception check.

MARISHA: Sorry, not to interrupt. (bitter laugh)

TRAVIS: That fucking dice.

MARISHA: Every fucking time. Just straight perception?

MATT: Yep.

MARISHA: Seven. Eight, eight, eight.

MATT: It's early enough where there are a handful of people walking in the streets going about their own business in the Shimmer Ward. There isn't a lot of, you know, it's too early for folks to be just out on a stroll necessarily, but you do see people that are like, you know, carrying small carts or satchels, probably just doing small deliveries of goods throughout the ward itself. No one seems to be paying much attention, from what you can tell. So you enter the inside, and you can see, there is a set of leather chairs that are arranged in a circle within a spacious den of some kind. The air immediately catches you as the smell of a combination of incense and vanilla. It's very pleasant. You look behind you from where you entered, and you see, beyond the door, not the rest of the cobblestone in the street where you have stepped in, but instead of balcony nearly 100 feet off the ground-- (gasping) overlooking the entirety of the ward, and much of the city of Rexxentrum. It is a gorgeous view of this little portal that you have, that you can only imagine, few have been able to really enjoy, or maybe will ever see from within this tower. Ludinus turns around as you all enter. "Please, have a seat."

SAM: I'm going to try to not look impressed.

LAURA: I'm looking so impressed.

MATT: Make a deception check.

SAM: Deception check. Yes, minus two, nine.

MATT: Nine.

LAURA: Nein!

MATT: All right.

(laughter)

LIAM: Can we see the school from this viewpoint?

MATT: From this viewpoint? Not unless you stand out on the balcony. This entryway is actually facing more of the terrace and the western side-- I'm sorry, the eastern side of the terrace, so you would not be able to see the school from here. You all take your seats?

SAM: As we do, I just quickly just give Caleb a little squeeze on his hand, just and a nod.

MATT: Okay. You see he casts a Mage Hand. You're familiar with this, this quick maneuver, and a small end table (creaking) scoots in the middle of the chairs, and--

LAURA: Eh, that one wasn't as impressive.

MATT: As you're all sitting down, a small tea set lifts over and sets onto it. It begins to heat up before you, and then begins to pour each of you a really nice tea. It's like a sweet citrus taste to it.

TALIESIN: This is pretty good, got to admit.

MATT: "All right, so, welcome, Mighty Nein."

LAURA: (laughs) Accidentally fell forward.

SAM: This is not--

LAURA: Shut up.

MATT: "So to get you up to speed with the information as I currently have it. Vence, my previous assistant, has not yet been recovered, but leads are promising, and our operatives expect to close on him within the day."

LAURA: He's naked?

TRAVIS: What?

LAURA: I thought you said, your operatives plan to find clothes on him by the--

SAM: To close in on him, close in on him.

LAURA: Oh.

TRAVIS and SAM: (chuckling)

MATT: "He is intended to be part of this negotiation offering. If he is indeed, as it seems to be, the individual responsible for this, at least partially responsible for this cult, as you say, then I think the Dynasty may be of interest as to his fate as well. Also, the relic of the Kryn has been confirmed recovered, and is being readied for transport under heavy guard whenever, if, that is arranged. Now, I'm sure you have many questions, and we can continue a discussion as we go from here, but I'm curious to hear your--"

TRAVIS: Could you tell us where your man has been tracked to or where they think he's gone? What area of the world?

MATT: "Well, he was not so ill-informed as to attempt any sort of teleportation. We think he's traveling on foot, which is in some ways more challenging to find, based on some of the wards we have placed on our members."

MARISHA: Hmm.

MATT: "Individuals of such import are generally marked in a way where we can keep tabs.

TRAVIS: Hmm.

LIAM: It sounds like you are prepared to hand him over. Do you not have questions of your own?

MATT: "Oh, we will definitely make our interrogation practices before we hand anyone over, but we are prepared, should it be requested, as part of this negotiation, to perhaps use him as part of the bargaining."

TALIESIN: Are you prepared for the notion that he might just be a small part of a larger corruption?

MATT: "Oh, we're not stopping with just him. I mean, we understand this cult itself exists far beyond just him, this individual with which you had done battle with beneath the Chantry. These investigations have been now opened quite heavily, and are being handled by both the Augen Trust and members of our Assembly."

TALIESIN: Would you be interested in a possible collaboration with the other side of this war, if it meant rooting out those people within their society as well, since they seem to be communicating?

MATT: "If you think you can find common ground there that they would agree to, I'm not against it. It would have to be a very carefully outlined alliance, and I am uncertain they would be willing, but."

LIAM: What is the Empire and the Assembly's current position on the Dynasty and the war?

MATT: "Well, we have little interest in winning a war with them. The spoils of such a conflict are a wasteland of Calamity-scarred marshes and deadly beasts, primarily. If anything, the people of the Dynasty themselves existing is a delightful buffer to the Empire from such terrible things and useless landscapes."

LIAM: And you personally, would you like to see this conflict come to a close?

MATT: "Aye, it is very messy. Many lives are lost. It is a distraction from much more important matters, and being able to maintain the peace and prosperity of our own people. It is very challenging to do good and to rightfully guide a society when it's constantly living in fear or driven towards anger."

TRAVIS: May I ask, have you seen this beacon yourself?

MATT: "I have been given confirmation of its a retrieval, and was planning to see it myself."

MARISHA: And who give you confirmation of its retrieval?

MATT: "Master Ikithon."

MARISHA: Hmm.

SAM: Would the idea be that we bring it with us to forge a peace? Or this is something that's delivered after?

MATT: "This would be something discussed as part of the negotiation. We could have it at the ready, should its procurement be required as part of this, as I assume it would need to be, but for the first stage in which you yourselves would be handling the status of setting this negotiation, I do not think it should."

TRAVIS: Martinet, I'm sure you can appreciate the convenience of the offer of giving up the one thing that the Dynasty has been so anxious to get their hands on. It would aid this negotiation if we were able to confirm that the beacon, in fact, exists, and that the Empire has it. I'm sure you can appreciate the questions that we would receive as to the validity of its actual ownership.

MATT: "Would you wish to accompany me in confirming it?"

TRAVIS: I think it would benefit us greatly if we could say that we had seen it with our own eyes.

MATT: "Done."

LAURA: All of us get to go see it?

MATT: "As many of you as could be present."

LAURA: Okay, good, good, good, good.

MARISHA: Where is it being held currently?

MATT: "I have not confirmed that yet with Master Ikithon, but that'll be the next order of business."

LIAM: Has Master Ikithon told you where it was found?

MATT: "No. I've not pried too much, it has only been of recent import."

MARISHA: Hmm.

TALIESIN: Hmm.

SAM: Giving that up seems very generous on the part of the Empire. What in exchange exactly would you be hoping to get back, besides assurances? MATT: "This is a part of the continued conversation to have with you. This war is not because of this relic. There are many things that led to this conflict. There are many reasons why we have a hard time striking any sort of peace with the Dynasty as long as we've been beside each other. I mean, open political unity is challenging because of their religion. The Empire does not recognize this Luxon entity, and the fervor in which they practice this promised escape from the cycle of death through a dubious, silent entity. It is both a cause for alarm and cautiousness. The King, along with the Assembly, believe that they are welcome to practice whatever faith they wish, so long as it remains beyond our borders and does not affect the lives of our people. But there has been a history of skirmishes with the Dynasty the stretches over 30 years at this point, which has been escalating in that time period. There have been misrepresented information gathering troops that were captured and tortured by the Kryn that was merely gathering intel to help maintain the security and safety of our people. There have been small encounters between soldiers on both sides growing into conflict and localized incidents. There was a discovered sect of Kryn missionaries found hiding within Nogvurot over a decade ago that led to a skirmish where many lives were lost on both sides. And this drastically began to raise tensions between both the Empire and the Dynasty. And there had been a high rate of Xhorhasian creatures wandering into our land, which gives reason to believe that there may be intent in pushing them in our direction. There are growing suspicions that the Dynasty covets our comparably resource-plentiful lands over their rather desolate landscapes, let alone a general mistrust here within the Empire of goblin kin, my apologies--"

SAM: Hmm.

MATT: "-- due to the smattering of violent clans, that still claim areas of the Marrow Valley and the surrounding mountain ranges. The history of such strife is hard to erase, regardless of how disciplined and benevolent the waste folk of Xhorhas can sometimes appear to be. So this culmination of the tension only merely erupted when this relic went missing."

MARISHA: What do you think led to this relic going missing in the first place?

MATT: "Honestly, I'm thinking it might have a very direct correlation as to these individuals that you've been recently touting your aggressions against, this Angel of Irons or Tharizdun followers, if you will."

MARISHA: You think so?

MATT: "That's one possibility."

MARISHA: Because we have found absolutely no cooperation or evidence between those two.

MATT: "Hmm. What are you thinking, then?"

MARISHA: I think that there are individuals on this side that might have more interest in what the Luxon has to offer, and its heebie-jeebie life-extending magic, than maybe you anticipated.

MATT: "That's very possible. But regardless of whatever reasons it may have found its way here, we are willing and eager to return it to them, if it means bringing this conflict and bloodshed to an end."

LIAM: This artifact came into your possession recently.

MATT: "Yes."

LIAM: Yes. But you've learned a great deal about them, it sounds like. There's been no previous encounters with the Dynasty's knowledge?

MATT: "In what way?"

LIAM: This is the first time you've encountered this thing you're describing, that Ikithon has told you about.

MATT: "This beacon? Well, we've heard of them. They carry them like a religious symbols into battle."

LIAM: And this is the first?

MATT: "This is the first that we've encountered, yes."

LIAM: Hmm.

MARISHA: Have you ever spent any time in Xhorhas?

TALIESIN: Insight motherfucking check on this.

MATT: Make an insight check, go for it.

TALIESIN: Almost want to like, give myself a spell for this.

LAURA: Didn't we see--

TALIESIN: That's 22.

MATT: 22, all right.

SAM: Oh boy.

LAURA: Wait, we saw him in Zadash.

SAM: Yeah, yes we did. The location of one of these things.

LAURA: Yeah, exactly, he fucking knows. They've had other ones. He's lying.

LIAM: Hey, DM.

SAM: This whisper brought to you by Idle Champions of the Forgotten Realms.

MARISHA: You're talking about when the tower was attacked in Zadash.

LIAM: I rolled a natural 20.

LAURA: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

MATT: Total of?

LIAM: Oh, for insight?

MATT: Mm-hmm.

LIAM: 28.

MATT: 28.

LAURA: Ooh.

SAM: Repeated whisper to remind you that the game's also available on PC, Mac, and Steam.

TRAVIS: Idle Champions?

SAM: Idle Champions of the Forgotten Realms. Which I think you can abbreviate as ICOTFR.

LAURA: Mm-hmm.

SAM: That's how I say it.

TRAVIS: Now with Arkhan the Cruel, I believe.

SAM: That's right, and the Vecna skin and feat pack.

TRAVIS: Ooh.

LAURA: Ooh!

TRAVIS: Ludinus. This may be quite forward of us. I'm sure you can appreciate the danger of us sort of traversing lines and putting ourselves as the middle man of all this, which we are excited to do.

MATT: "And I do have my questions on that as well, but continue."

TRAVIS: We're sure.

SAM: Are you about to lay down the 10 demands right now?

TALIESIN: I was going to say, do we want to have this conversation now, or do we want to find out what your questions are before--

LAURA: Oh, let's let Fjord say what he's going to say.

TRAVIS: No, please.

TALIESIN: I mean.

TRAVIS: We've been doing enough of the talking. We should really open it up to more of a discussion, please.

MATT: "Well, I was going to inquire as to how integrated you are with the Bright Queen, personally. From what we heard and was discussed within the chambers of the King, you seem to have traveled to Xhorhas and made some sort of arrangement, or at least ingratiated yourselves in some way that she trusted the invoking of your name enough to withdraw her troops from a direct attack on the capital. That is quite an arrangement."

LIAM: I think perhaps she saw-- a chance through me to, as small as it is, to make amends. I'm not aware if you know this already, although I suspect you do. I was once one of Master Ikithon's students.

MATT: "I was not aware."

MARISHA: Insight check.

MATT: Make an insight check.

MARISHA: You're lying.

SAM: All these.

MARISHA: No way.

SAM: We're so trustworthy.

MARISHA: Fuck. Why? Oh, it's not good.

LAURA: (laughs) 11.

MATT: He's hard to read. Like a stone wall.

LIAM: I believe he would see me as a bit of a failed experiment. I left his tutelage, years ago.

MATT: "Hmm. Well, you seem to have done well for yourself since then. Trent can be a prickly individual, and his tutelage is not right for everyone."

LIAM: He's a very clever man, and has much to teach. Anyway, to today.

SAM: To answer your question, we've ingratiated ourselves with the Bright Queen quite closely.

LAURA: Yeah, she has a huge crush on Fjord.

TALIESIN: Trust might be a very generous word. I wouldn't use it.

SAM: Don't you see it?

LIAM: We traveled there because our large friend is from there, and we meant to win her back from this cult, and while we were there, we found ourselves captured, and questioned, and it became known, my connection to Master Ikithon and this city, and I am a child of the Empire. So is my friend here. And I wish to see an end to the war. And I think in that moment, fearing for my friends' lives, I saw a chance to make amends between these two nations. And I know that the chance is slim, but I would like to see the Assembly and the crown to weave their way towards an end to this conflict. We tried to convince the Bright Queen of the same, and while she was wary and rightly skeptical, she did take a small chance on us.

MATT: "How confident are you that you would be able to reach further this time, to bridge this gap that you seem so interested in doing?"

LIAM: Well, you know, she keeps us at arm's length. She's the ruler of a large and powerful place, but we have made connections. They trust us up to a point.

MARISHA: We've already asked her questions on if we got this item back, if it would end the war. We heard all the things you just listed from her perspective. Seems she's also pretty pissed at the years and years and years of conflict between borders, and those Empire agents that you mentioned trying to keep the peace over in Xhorhas, she didn't really take kindly to, or see from your perspective, I think.

MATT: "Well, we didn't take kindly to them infiltrating some of our populace and spreading their religious drivel."

LIAM: Martinet, both sides are peopled with very intelligent, crafty individuals.

MATT: "Of course, and those individuals can exist together in a very delicately arranged balance of mutually assured... benevolence."

LIAM: I beseech you. What happened in that temple is a sign of worse things to come, and they are far worse than any grabs for an inch more of power. I hope you hear me.

MATT: Make a persuasion check.

LIAM: 16.

MATT: Okay. "What are your thoughts on the approach to the Bright Queen? How do you plan to take this to her?"

TALIESIN: She knows we serve peace. She's always been comfortable with the fact that we were not really hers. She knows what we want.

SAM: We can certainly make our way back there, but if you have means of travel to and from that are quicker, we wouldn't--

MATT: "I highly doubt we do, and the travel in doing so would probably put somebody not as trusted as yourselves in the line of fire. I think if you've been there as many times as you appear to have, you may have a much better chance at arriving without issue."

LIAM: Are you trusting us to handle this issue ourselves? The nine of us?

MATT: "For the initial discussion, yes."

TRAVIS: Martinet, forgive this question, the entrance into this chamber was quite dramatic. I'm assuming our conversation here is protected from outside eyes?

MATT: "All of it."

TRAVIS: Wonderful. I think it'll be a very slow process. I think the offering of a chance of this beacon will provoke some interest, with caution. I would then think we would need to secure a neutral location where they don't feel exposed and neither does the King. But I don't promise any sort of a timeline, or a deliverable, in any sort of way.

MATT: "I do not believe it needs to be immediate, but time is of the essence. This current tenuous ceasefire only lasts as long as the good will of your friend Allura's recent warning, and perhaps this meeting you're having, might allow. That could be days, weeks at most. So whatever you do, and decide to do, keep that in mind."

TALIESIN: Something we could bring, before we get into other discussions. I'm sure they might be grateful to have whatever intel we've currently collected on this cult and some of its dealings over here so that they could see that this problem is on both sides of the border. That was a--

MATT: "So you know this cult has had its own influences on the Xhorhasian side as well?"

TALIESIN: Very much so.

LAURA: They were opening up portals over there as well.

MATT: "Then that is very much a good direction to take this conversation. Mutual enemies can make for fast and strange allies, at certain times."

TRAVIS: Do you have perhaps a seal that we could take with us? Something that shows that we have made contact with the powers that be of Empire and shows that they are--

MATT: "That can be provided."

TRAVIS: Wonderful.

LAURA: Do you think in future meetings, with you or anyone else, that we could have pastries and/or chocolate available?

MATT: Make a persuasion check.

TRAVIS: I will assist her.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: Natural one.

(laughter)

MATT: Fjord said-- before you rolled, before you rolled-- he did say he was going to assist you, so you get advantage on the roll. LAURA: I'm just going to roll the same one.

SAM: Come on, come on, come on 20, come on 20.

LAURA: Oh, that's pretty good. (laughs) 19.

TALIESIN: She's very serious.

MATT: "Truly?" You see him taken aback, like-- "Very well."

TRAVIS: (laughs)

TALIESIN: Good ask, good ask.

LAURA: (whispering) Thank you, hard line. That's like two of the lines.

TALIESIN: We are definitely going to have to have a discussion about how this beacon thing got into--

TRAVIS: I think if perhaps we see it, that'll be the time.

TALIESIN: That'll be the conversation to have, if it really is it.

MATT: "Then we'll have it at the time. Perhaps after this meeting."

SAM: I don't think there's anything else to discuss right now.

MATT: "Well, I'm mildly curious, have you put any thought to such a location of neutrality--"

LAURA: Well--

MATT: "-- that might be recommended for this gathering?

TALIESIN: I had an idea, but that's--

TRAVIS: Go ahead, what's your idea?

TALIESIN: I mean, I don't even know if I want to.

TRAVIS: You definitely want to say it.

TALIESIN: I want to run it by you first, because it's kind of crazy.

MATT: "Speak up, please."

TRAVIS: I think I know what you're thinking.

LIAM: I do too.

SAM: I don't at all.

TALIESIN: Am I crazy for thinking it?

SAM: I don't know, what are you guys thinking?

LAURA: What are you thinking?!

SAM: On the deck of a ship?

LAURA: Come on, we'll say it at the same time.

TALIESIN: We do have a pocket dimension.

LAURA: Oh.

TALIESIN: We could do it in the Happy Fun Ball.

MARISHA: No.

SAM: Seems unnecessary.

TALIESIN: Now hear me out.

MATT: "What is the 'happy fun ball'?"

TALIESIN: One second.

MARISHA: No.

TALIESIN: Hear me out, hear me out. It's territory we control, it's impossible to--

LAURA: Do we, though?

TALIESIN: As long as we stick to just one room--

MATT: "What is the happy fun ball?"

TRAVIS: Apologies--

TALIESIN: And there's no outside influence, I'm just saying. I've been thinking about it.

TRAVIS: An arcane item that carries some inter-planar space within it, it's--

MATT: "Where is this?"

MARISHA: It's no big deal, don't worry about it. I think there are easier ways.

TALIESIN: I'm still putting it out there.

SAM: The item is far, far away, and we can't, it's not the greatest idea because it's dangerous.

TALIESIN: Of course it's dangerous.

MARISHA: It's complicated.

LAURA: What about if we had it on a volcano?

SAM: She's not, this is actually a better plan than she's selling it.

MATT: Every expression, whenever Jester speaks up, is a look and bewilderment and confusion, and generally the only time in this meeting you've seen him thrown off. Every reaction is--

SAM: There's an island, there's a volcano island, that's neutral territory, not controlled by either Dynasty or Empire. We wouldn't be on a volcano like in the middle of the hot part of it, right? We would be down--

LAURA: I honestly don't know.

TALIESIN: Seems like a weird idea.

MARISHA: Why don't we just go on our boat?

LAURA: What about on a boat?!

LIAM: The Menagerie Coast is neutral. SAM and MARISHA: International waters.

LAURA: We'd have to stay away from the pirate island, because they don't like us.

TRAVIS: Come on, let's go to Darktow, let them host it! It'll be amazing!

LAURA: I could send a message.

MARISHA: We were told not to come back to Darktow, or else we would be decapitated.

LAURA: What if I send a message to the Plank King?

MATT: "You've recommended... a volcano, and Darktow."

TRAVIS: Or the Savalirwood.

ASHLEY: And the fun ball.

TALIESIN: It's a very fun ball.

MATT: "Savalirwood. These are three extremely dangerous locations you've offered already."

TRAVIS: Yes, you'd both have to come very well prepared to defend yourselves, neither having an advantage in any of the three spaces.

LAURA: Maybe we should go to Allura. Maybe she had a good idea. SAM: Do you know anyone on the Tal'Dorei Council? Besides Allura, because we could have it there.

TALIESIN: Do you know what the Tal'Dorei Council is? Because people keep saying that to me and I have got no idea what it is.

MATT: "I know of it, but I have not had any specific dealings with them besides this Allura Vysoren."

TRAVIS: If you want to have a little bit more of an advantage, of course the Rockguard Garrison sort of borders between both spaces, yes?

MATT: "It does, but it is entirely-- both garrisons as of recently are now back under our control. I wouldn't consider that neutral territory."

LIAM: How would you feel about traveling to the Menagerie Coast?

MATT: "I'm all right with that."

SAM: Oh, all right.

LAURA: We could host everyone at the Lavish Chateau.

TRAVIS: Oh boy.

TALIESIN: Huh.

LAURA: And then my mom could sing to them.

TALIESIN: That feels dangerous.

MARISHA: I don't think we want anything personal.

TRAVIS: I don't think you want to bring them near your mother.

SAM: But think of the business you could bring to the Chateau.

LAURA: Yes.

TALIESIN: Think of all the random people.

MARISHA: I'm kind of into the boat idea. We own a nice boat. It's a nice boat. It's a pirate boat that we inherited. That we stole.

MATT: "What's it called?"

MARISHA: That we got. Mm-hmm.

SAM: It's called the Balleater. (laughing) It's a long story. It used to be called the Squalleater--

SAM and LAURA: -- but we changed it.

MATT: He immediately looks to Jester.

SAM: Yeah, Jester changed it.

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: "I see. I'm beginning to understand quite clearly who I'm working with."

LAURA: Oh, but don't get the wrong impression, we're super capable.

MATT: "Oh, I in no way, shape, or form had assumed otherwise.

LIAM: Perhaps a few miles outside the city of Nicodranas on the Menagerie Coast, away from prying eyes.

MATT: "That seems viable."

MARISHA: On the ocean, on a boat.

MATT: "There are a few options I was also considering."

LAURA: Oh, yes, tell us yours.

MATT: "Outside of Nicodranas may work well. The Menagerie Coast is more neutral territory, and away from any of the current places of existing conflict. A boat or ship would also bring us to neutral territory, though depending on the size of the forces that would be coming to the negotiation, I do not know if it would be able to keep it, as I assume both the King and the Bright Queen would be keen on bringing some form of sizable defense, in case things were to go awry."

LAURA: Ooh, it sounds like something could-- What if they both leave their territories and then the Chained Oblivion attacks at the same time?!

MARISHA: Yeah.

SAM: They're not going to leave ev-- They're going to leave some people behind, right?

MARISHA: But the point of doing this on neutral territory was to not have a display of military force.

MATT: "Of course. But you do realize that they're not going to go completely unprotected either."

MARISHA: They don't have to go completely unprotected, but I think a very select number of people is wise when having a peace treaty conversation.

MATT: "Mm-hmm."

LIAM: You're not talking about having King Dwendal and the Bright Queen meet somewhere, are you?

LAURA: Are we?

SAM: Yes, yeah, I think that's what we are saying.

TALIESIN: Or are we just talking about representatives?

LIAM: Why would the king wish to expose himself like that, instead of staying here in the seat of power?

MATT: "No, I'm just saying, whatever situation of negotiation you present, there's going to be some sort of a force that's going to want to protect whoever's making this negotiation. Whoever shows up to this negotiation, well, that depends on how well it goes and what seems to be best for the arrangements you've arranged."

LIAM: But if you're thinking it, I don't think we're going to have an easy time to coax the Bright Queen herself to visit anywhere. You are going to be dealing with intermediaries.

SAM: You can also do the Ashguard Garrison, you know, if you don't want to go to the boat thing.

TALIESIN: I like the boat.

MATT: "The Ashguard Garrison has recently been the location of quite a bit of a battle, and perhaps would be a sore spot, based on the bloodshed lost on both sides. I think these recommendations are fine. Whichever ones you feel strongly about and they seem to be receptive to, follow through with them. Eiselcross maybe a bit too cold, so I think that will take us where we need to be."

TRAVIS: It'll also, of course, depend on feedback from the Dynasty, but we will certainly float those at the top of the list.

MATT: "All right."

TRAVIS: No.

TRAVIS: Oh, I see. You said float, nevermind. I don't care.

SAM: Should we go see this beacony thing, then?

MATT: "Yes. I just wanted to say also, is, as part of this arrangement that we are crafting together. Know, as I can tell and sense there is quite a bit of tension and mistrust here, especially with some of the histories that may have come along with you into my chambers. As a token to show my interest in seeing this done properly, and with a mutual respect. You are aware that your friend here has been responsible for quite a unfortunate incidence in Zadash."

TALIESIN: That's a perspective.

TRAVIS: Yeah, we totally fucking skipped that part of the trap.

MATT: "Well."

LAURA: She wasn't under her own control, you know.

MATT: "I trust that may be the case. However, the investigation by the Archive of Zadash has come to Rexxentrum in the night, and they have not yet made the connection. I have taken the liberty of obfuscating this individual's involvement. So for the time being, and perhaps for the foreseeable future, you should be fine."

LAURA: Wow.

ASHLEY: Thank you for doing that. You didn't need to do that, but thank you.

MARISHA: Okay.

TALIESIN: The site of the battle. What's become of it?

MATT: "Of the city itself?"

TALIESIN: Of the temple beneath.

LIAM: The temple underneath it.

MARISHA: The Chantry.

MATT: "The Chantry. There has been a heavy amount of investigation over the evening, acquiring what remnants of the individual that you slew, known as Obann, I believe it was."

LAURA: The Punished!

MATT: "Unbeknownst to really any of us, the shackle beneath the Chantry is intact. So. And some of the research that has come up regarding this, from the Cobalt Soul, and, I believe, some of which was spoken upon your arrival, the other shackles still remain a mystery and unfound, which is safe."

MARISHA: And refresh me one more time, who did you say was leading the investigation? You mentioned her earlier.

MATT: "I don't know who specifically it was, but it's just the Archive of Zadash was."

MARISHA: And the Cerberus Assembly, is that what you said earlier?

MATT: "No, they've just arrived through the night.

MARISHA: Who did you say, you said research was happening? Marisha to DM question.

MATT: Yes.

MARISHA: Did you say Ogden? Was Ogden something you said?

MATT: May have been a miscommunication.

MARISHA: Okay.

TRAVIS: Insight check.

(Laura and Matt laughing)

MATT: "But the threat and the extent of it is being researched. Nobody wants a cult of Tharizdun to be given free reign."

TRAVIS: I hope not.

MATT: "That does not bode well for anyone. And we are looking into it. We are seeking out the details of who has been involved, and rounding them up to be judged and punished appropriately."

LAURA: We found a lot of people involved.

MATT: "Well, it seems that the ones locally were largely handled by you lot and a number of our Righteous Brand and the Cobalt Soul, upon arrival. But if what they've done spans the globe, this is information that needs to be pursued. So we are also reaching out and sending missives to other countries and other governments to at least follow these same signs, and thankfully it looks like their involvement is relatively small, and that's how they were able to work unnoticed for so long. Any larger, you probably would've seen signs a lot sooner."

TRAVIS: I know your investigation is into this particular shackle. Would it be too much to ask that, perhaps whoever's involved, try and put some thought into where the other shackles might be, based upon what you find in there?

MATT: "Certainly."

TRAVIS: Defending those positions or preventing them from discovery would, I think, go a long way.

MATT: "I've reached out to Vasselheim. They would probably be the individuals having the most information. But it hasn't been but a day since the occurrences, and responses can be delayed."

LAURA: If you Send a message, you can get an immediate response. Short, but--

MATT: "That is what I generally do."

LAURA: Oh.

MATT: "But there's a bit of a bureaucracy, and, to be honest, a historical lack of... generosity and exuberance from the line of kings. So Vasselheim needs to warm up to these revelations from the Empire before they'll be forthcoming."

LAURA: Right.

MATT: "And, of course, the less anyone knows about the whereabouts of these shackles, probably the safer they are."

TRAVIS: Certainly.

LIAM: Insight check!

MATT: Make an insight check.

LAURA: Ooh, I wonder if he knows.

TRAVIS: Do I believe him?

LIAM: 23!

SAM: More whispers?

LAURA: Oh, I bet he knows the location of them and he just doesn't want to tell us right now.

SAM: Idlechampions.com/criticalrole is where he can get more information.

LAURA: Mm-hmm.

SAM: Don't forget, if you were a fan of Standup Santa, just ask for him back, and he'll come.

LAURA: Is that something that I missed and I'm glad?

SAM: Yes, you should be happy that you did.

MATT: Yeah. (laughs) Your expression would've been like the one on Sam's shirt.

LAURA: Yeah.

SAM: Which one?

TRAVIS: That one.

TALIESIN: All of them, oh.

LIAM: That's the happiest I ever was. (laughter)

MATT: "Well, I guess we would make our way to confirm the beacon, if you are ready."

LAURA: Are we going to go see it and we're going to go see Trent Ikithon?

MATT: "Well, he's the one who's currently preparing it for transport. I imagine so. If that is challenging, you may stay behind if you wish, Mr. Widogast."

LIAM: DM.

MATT: Mm-hmm.

LIAM: I was thinking about a family matter. Can you repeat what you just said?

(laughter)

MATT: Noted. He's basically saying, if you aren't currently tied up at the moment, we'll go and see the beacon now. She inquired if Trent will be there, and he said most likely, as he's preparing the beacon.

LIAM: That is important information.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: But then asked you if you're comfortable or not, and if not, you may stay behind.

LIAM: Okay. No.

LAURA: You'll come?

LIAM: Yeah, yeah.

MATT: "All right. Well then." He stands up, sets his tea down, which is finished.

LAURA: We just follow you, then? Do we just follow you?

MATT: "Well, I'll take you in there, I just need to inform him of our arrival. It's polite to let them know when you're coming first."

LAURA: Oh. We need to be better about that.

SAM: It is.

TALIESIN: Boy, if we've learned anything, actually.

MATT: Makes a familiar hand gesture, but that's more subtle and more, it's like a quickened version of the Sending spell. It's second nature. To which he speaks, "'Arriving to inspect the relic and confirm for our negotiating team that it is indeed ready to be presented to the Dynasty.' "Shall we?

SAM: Yes.

TRAVIS: Lead on.

LAURA: Oh, okay, okay, okay.

MATT: Begins to take his hands and encircle them, leaving this faint trail of light blue-white. As it begins to encircle it and draw lines, and the center points begins to slowly expand, almost like a rippling ring of water, until it encompasses your entire circled group of chairs.

LAURA: Are you going to transport the chairs, too?

MATT: "No, you might wish to stand."

TALIESIN: Oh, I'll stand.

MATT: And he continues and finishes the incantation.

LAURA: I grab my tail to make sure it's in the circle.

MATT: All right, and that familiar rush hits you as suddenly you are transported out of the tower, pulled away into darkness, into light that stretches and smears, and then thrusts you back into reality. You all come to your feet. It is midday, though it is still shaded. You find yourself under a bunch of trees in a small clearing, a dense forest. You look before you and you can see a mountain range that climbs up in the sky. It's still clouded, overcast day, trees climb up the side of the mountains. Before you, you see a unique-looking number of buildings. There are these tall, pieces of gothic architecture. Some three or four stories, some towers, a very tall wrought iron fence that surrounds the entire locale, and there are guards posted. You recognize this place. He goes, "Welcome to the Vergessen Sanatorium. "Follow me, please."

MARISHA: Oh fuck.

TRAVIS: (surprised laughter) Holy shit!

MATT: And that's where we're going to take a break. (groaning and shouting) (Matt laughing)

TRAVIS: Oh, that's where they sent him when he was crazy!

LAURA: Oh.

TRAVIS: Oh no! This is better than Halloween!

MATT: (laughs) We have our Wyrmwood giveaway. We're giving away here, we have our black poisonwood dice vault, which is all sorts of pretty, for one lucky winner in the chat. Tonight's codename is diplomacy.

TALIESIN: Hey.

LIAM: Pow, pow, pow.

TALIESIN: That's a throwback.

MATT: Indeed. So go ahead and put the word diplomacy once into the chat room to enter. More than once, you'll be disqualified, and once again, only for people in the U.S. and Canada, excluding Quebec, because stupid laws. But we'll return here shortly to continue the story. See you in a minute.

Break
(upbeat music) ♪ You got the perfect warlock ♪ ♪ Her weapons and supplies ♪ ♪ But you need a place to track your stuff ♪ ♪ Because you're so disorganized ♪ ♪ You click open the web page ♪ ♪ You heard about on Critical Role ♪ ♪ And now you're ready to kick some butt ♪ ♪ In that mineshaft full of gnolls ♪ ♪ It's D&D;, D&D; ♪ ♪ Yeah, D&D; Beyond ♪ ♪ Yeah D&D;, D&D; ♪ ♪ Yeah, D&D; Beyond ♪ ♪ You got your stats, you've got your swords ♪ ♪ And you got your invisible wand ♪ ♪ It's D&D;, D&D; ♪ ♪ D&D; ♪ ♪ D&D; Beyond ♪ JOE (V.O.): Working with Idle Champions has been so much fun, because it's a different version of Arkhan. It's like a cartoon coloring book version of Arkhan, which is really, really fun. So seeing the artwork originally for little Arkhan in the game, the way that he walks across the screen with his shield and he breathes fire, and then even the way that Chungo the manticore comes down at different points. (sword clashes and explosions) It's so much fun. I mean, you can only dream to have a character of yours that immortalized in that way, and playable and unlockable in a video game. The Arkhan in Idle Champions currently is an earlier version of Arkhan. So a pre-Hand of Vecna Arkhan. How did Arkhan get the Hand of Vecna? Arkhan was sent out by Tiamat over the course of, you know, a decade to go and retrieve artifacts for her. So a Tiamat would appear to Arkhan in dreams, and she would reveal to him the location of a great weapon that could help him, or a great suit of armor, like the axe that he carries, belonged to a general of Asmodeus and was buried inside of his tomb, so Arkhan went on this adventure to find that axe of Asmodeus. And so Tiamat would appear to him in dreams, and she did the same to him in terms of this extinction event that was potentially about to happen, where Vecna had teleported huge pieces of land from the Shadowfell, and armies, and animated this giant long-dead Titan and was inside of this mile-high structure, juggernaut, going to destroy everything its path. And so Arkhan was sent there in order to stop Vecna from destroying the realm. Arkhan's entire party was killed, except for him, and he wound up using his charisma to become assimilated into another group that shared the same primary objective, which was to kill Vecna, and destroy Vecna and stop Vecna from taking over the Prime Material Plane. Now, what this party didn't know was that Arkhan had a secondary objective, which was to find out what was allowing Vecna to teleport cities and armies from other planes, and bring that back. So during that battle, Arkhan survived, and towards the end realized that the power was coming from Vecna's hand. So when the battle was won, one of the... members of this party that Arkhan joined was going to die. And so in this very vulnerable moment, this, you know, the friends were gathered around as he was about to pass, and Arkhan pulled off this move. In this very vulnerable moment, he used their vulnerability against them, and in a quiet moment, led them to believe that he was sent to destroy the hand. And he had the power to do so in this axe. And when he raised his hand up and whispered a prayer to Tiamat, and everyone looked on, he swung the axe down, chopped his own arm off, replaced it with Vecna's hand, and teleported away. He teleported to Krull, who was waiting for him, who healed him from the battle and opened a door to Avernus, to where Arkhan went and then had an audience with Tiamat. Tiamat rose this giant tower of obsidian and volcanic rock out of hell, and this nine layers tower with dragon heads around the top. Arkhan and Krull then sent for Toragar, and he met them there, and this army formed, this dragon army formed around Arkhan, who was this champion who had returned with what the dragon called, and the dragon armies believed was the actual cure for Tiamat's imprisonment, that finally someone was going to come along with the power to free her. But Arkhan needed time to figure out how to use the hand, and how to unlock its power. And so he began this series of mental battles with Vecna, where they would meet on this ethereal plane, and have these mental face-offs, and these mental battles, in which Arkhan would try to understand Vecna's secrets while Vecna would try to gain control over Arkhan's mind. That's how our Arkhan got the hand, and that's what he's doing with it now, and that's what he's up to when you as a player character run into him, he is in the middle of this process trying to free Tiamat. (dramatic music) BRIAN (V.O.): Last time, on Talks Machina. MARISHA: (high-pitched) The socials. BRIAN: That's kind of your cuttlefish, except it's not as good. MARISHA: No. I can't do that voice. I can't do it. BRIAN: The speak 'n spell, that man has a lot of talent. TALIESIN: Nope. BRIAN: Man has a lot of talent. Yeah, that's pretty good, Dani. TALIESIN: Pretty good. DANI: That was good. BRIAN: Well, it's not as good, of course. MARISHA: It's like the Stitch voice. It's like Macaroni Samsonite, it's all in that same like... (babbling) And I can't do it. I can't do it. BRIAN: Would you mind doing that again, but looking at that camera right there? MARISHA: Thanks. Thanks, Zach, for cutting to my single. DANI: I'm trying to save you from yourself, man. TALIESIN: That's just going to become an internet thing. Why would you do that to yourself? MARISHA: Beau's not stupid. BRIAN: Mm-hmm. MARISHA: Beau will only challenge authority when she feels like it is yeah, a challenge that she can make with limited repercussions, hopefully, one that she can successfully win, or at least get out of if challenged. There's like, oh, I'm going to fuck with authority figures. And then there's like, talking to the King of the nation that you probably don't want to fuck with, or else be locked in an Empire prison for the rest of your life and never seen again. BRIAN: Beau's been more actively leaning into her role in the Cobalt Soul, now that she's become an expositor. Does she feel more connected to the organization as a whole now, in addition to individuals like Dairon and Zeenoth? MARISHA: For sure. I mean... it's like anybody when they get a promotion in their workplace. You feel a little bit more ownership, and now you're, like, more peer level with the people who were your authority figures. So, there you go. There's your authority figure question. TALIESIN: Nothing worse punk that becomes a cop, man. MARISHA: (laughs) TALIESIN: Changed, changed. MARISHA: It's true. BRIAN: Boy, that's true. MARISHA: That's true, isn't it, Hanukah moose? Yeah. BRIAN: Boy, that's true. Would you mind putting that just right next to your face and looking at Greg here for a second? Zach, you got it handy? Let's see what we-- MARISHA: (laughs) BRIAN: Yeah, let's see what we can come up with. TALIESIN: I know what's coming. BRIAN: You know what's coming? TALIESIN: I have a hint. BRIAN: No, you don't. MARISHA: Yep, yep. TALIESIN: (Caduceus voice) Yeah, I mean. DANI: Oh god. BRIAN: Now, when I think about the greatest episodes of Talks Machina. TALIESIN: (Caduceus voice) What are you going to think about, really? BRIAN: Caduceus admitted to The Gentleman that there is a part of him that is lonely. How much of that was truth and how much was an attempt to persuade him to tell Jester the truth? TALIESIN: Oh, of course it was the truth. That's Caduceus's whole-- whole trick, is just tell the truth. Yeah, he misses his family. And like, they left him in kind of a shitty way, when you think about it, just like, he just sat in the same place while people left, and then six months later, someone else left, and then six months later, someone, people just kept not coming back, until he was sitting alone in a forest by himself for quite awhile. MARISHA: Why haven't you ever tried to scry on any of them? TALIESIN: (sputtering exhale) That's a question, isn't it? DANI: (laughs) BRIAN: Boy, that got a reaction. TALIESIN: Wow. MARISHA: You've never asked. BRIAN: That got a bit of a reaction, didn't it? MARISHA: You've never been like, can I scry on my brothers? TALIESIN: Do you want the simple answer to that or the complex answer to that? BRIAN: I don't want an answer to that, actually. DANI: I mean, I do. BRIAN: No, I don't, because I want to save it, I feel like that might-- I feel like that could come out in-game. TALIESIN: It could come out in-game. BRIAN: So I'm like, I'm on team save it, I'm not into instant gratification. TALIESIN: There's the answer he would give and then there's the truth. (laughing) MARISHA: You just said Caduceus was all about the truth. TALIESIN: Yes, but you found a hole in that. MARISHA and DANI: (gasping) TALIESIN: You found a hole. BRIAN: Oh, that took forever. Boy. TALIESIN: Yeah, that's a deep, dark place. MARISHA: Fucking expositor! Yeah! DANI: (laughs) TALIESIN: All they can see is your sweater. Ah, god, did you just moose me? MARISHA: Yeah, just moose dropped you, bitch. TALIESIN: Fuck, dude! BRIAN: You got moose dropped, biatch. TALIESIN: Right in the nose. MARISHA: Sorry. (Pumat grunting) MATT: Oh. Well! (chuckling) Would you look at that? I think it worked. You were right, Pumat number three. All we had to do was invoke that subscription cantrip. Pumat number three? Oh boy. Well, hello there. I'm Pumat Prime. It's good to finally join you here in the prime dimension. I see this is the Twitch Prime realm, I think, and oh, we're on the Critical Role channel, aren't we? Well, would you look at that, you got chat and everything. (chuckles) Respectfully, I was looking for the prime rib realm, but this isn't too bad. You see, if you already have access to the Amazon Prime realm, you can get a free subscription to the channel of your choice in the Twitch Prime realm. The two realms have a pretty good working relationship after that peace treaty the prime minister signed a few years back. You just have to remember to renew your Twitch Prime subscription at the top of each month, respectfully. And hey, if you're already a subscriber, you can spread the joy by gifting a subscription using the Gift a Sub button. That is, assuming the Empire hasn't sent a tax man to your shop here recently. (chuckling) All right, well, off to find that darn elusive prime rib realm. Who knew the prime dimension had so many pockets? Good luck. (chuckles) (echoing) Pumat three? TALIESIN (V.O.): Subscribe. Re-subscribe. Brian Foster is not a cabbage. (dramatic music)

Part II
MATT: Welcome back. So, before we get back into the game, we do have our winner for this evening. The winner of our Wyrmwood giveaway is Forsakenpoet541.

LIAM: Oh no!

MATT: Forsakenpoet541, congratulations, we'll get that sent to you ASAP.

TRAVIS: Yay.

LIAM: Somebody help that poet.

MATT: I know. We're going to help them with a dice box. Little dice carrying case. All righty, so, last we left off, as the troop of you begin to walk towards the somewhat serene, but still imposing sight of the Vergessen Sanatorium, you approach behind Martinet Ludinus towards the main gate, which in itself is about a 10-foot high, about eight-foot wide iron gate that rises up in a curve at the top where it breaks open. There are two guards placed there, both wearing Crownsguard uniforms, though darker, meant for more, guess you would say, not stealth, but to blend in better with the forest arrangement around here, carrying spears, and as they see Ludinus, they nod, and one of them opens the gate, which (imitates creaking), opens into the courtyard. And the courtyard around here, beautiful grass. You can see there are two fountains that are readily visible, there are trees, small gardens, and there are, total within the space here, five main structures that you can see, two of which are connected by hallways, the others are separate with little stone paths that lead between them. They're large buildings. The towers themselves stand up at the corners of the entire interior while this main central building itself is a very, very, like wide, three-story mansion-like structure that the roof comes into these large peaks that have, you know, iron symbols that are carved at the top that rise up. It has in some ways like a European church type architecture to it, but does not have any sort of religious symbolism or connotation to it. It's very beautiful, if dark. You approach and come towards the center of the courtyard, two of the other guards approach and flank to the sides to just be an escort, and wordlessly, the Martinet leads you towards the distant right tower. You may--

LAURA: Mr. Martinet, you're not just going to like, bring us here and then leave us here, right?

MATT: "I don't think it would do any good, in our situation. The sanatorium has many uses. It is a place of recovery, it is a place of care taking to individuals who cannot take care of themselves, particularly those of skillsets that make them challenging to treat, in more public regions. It's also a place of learning for those with learning challenges. And it is a place where we, the Assembly, can maintain... some of our research, without worrying about, how you say, political challenges."

ASHLEY: Can people come and go as they wish, or are some people here, can they leave?

MATT: "Those that are not admitted can leave. Those that are here by choice for the period in which they signed themselves to be here are to be maintained, but they themselves give consent to the sanatorium to keep them, and those that are kept because they are a danger to themselves or others, they should be kept until they are well.

LIAM: During this whole walk and talk, Caleb wordlessly stares, very pointedly, at Nott and at Beau, listening to this conversation ahead of him.

TRAVIS: Lead on.

MATT: "Indeed." The far tower is-- it's a wide tower, and it looks to be about, at its full height, about 80 or so feet from the ground. It pincers towards the top of the-- it's thicker at the base. Not crenelated on the edges. As opposed to just a thick stronghold, this has a little more design flair to it. It mimics a lot of the architecture of the central mansion building. You enter through a side doorway, and into one of two chambers that the bottom floor is separated into. This is more of a lounge or a waiting space, in which case Ludinus goes, "If you would give me but a moment, I'm going to inquire as to the readiness of our arrival." And he exits down the nearby stairway, out of sight.

MARISHA: I'm assuming the escorts stay?

MATT: The escorts stay.

SAM: How you feeling, Caleb? You okay?

ASHLEY: Have you been here before?

LAURA: How long were you here for?

LIAM: (quietly) 11 years.

ASHLEY: What did you say?

LIAM: (clears throat) (louder) 11 years.

ASHLEY: That is what I thought you said.

SAM: In this area, where we are, or the other side? Or you don't know.

LIAM: This is a public waiting room.

SAM: I mean this building, this structure?

MATT: You see two uniformed figures enter through one of the doorways. They're wearing a light gray general piece of work attire, it's form-fitting but comfortable looking, plain, and they both just walk past and just take notice and continue on their business, going up to an upper floor.

MARISHA: You busted out of this place. Yeah?

SAM: Well, we're here for you, so don't worry.

LIAM: I don't remember much of it anyway. Which is funny.

MARISHA: Have we been by any other admittants?

SAM: Oh, like patients?

MARISHA: Patients?

MATT: Mm-mm.

TALIESIN: Are we inside or are we outside?

MATT: You are inside the tower.

TALIESIN: We are inside the tower.

LIAM: It's for visitors, where we are.

MATT: Correct.

LIAM: We're not in--

MATT: Or this chamber in particular, it's a holding room for people to then be brought to other portions of the tower.

LIAM: Yeah, we're not in it.

TALIESIN: Try and quietly listen very carefully for any conversations happening.

LIAM: Would I have on the walk-- I'm sorry.

TALIESIN: Go ahead.

LIAM: On the walk up, have recognized the layout to know where I was kept compared to where we are?

MATT: Yeah.

LIAM: Is it this building, or--?

MATT: No, no, you were kept in the main manor.

LIAM: Main manor.

MATT: Which is where most of the... most of the patients are kept.

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: The general towers on the outside are for the people that work the sanatorium, it's also where equipment is kept, it's also where research is conducted, and it's also where certain events and classes and things are occasionally held there.

TRAVIS: The outside towers?

MATT: Yeah.

TRAVIS: There's five, so tower, tower, building, building, building?

MATT: Mm-hmm.

MARISHA: And we're just more or less in like a lobby or hall?

MATT: Kind of, for the time being. MARISHA: Okay.

TALIESIN: Listening closely to the conversations that are happening around, just trying to like listen to the building. Natural 20 for 29.

MATT: Oh shit.

TRAVIS: Ooh.

MATT: Shit. You hear the two assigned guards that are watching you guys are having a conversation about how they're both frustrated that the Harvest Festival was missed, and they were stuck here, and now that they're hearing about like, all this, yeah, they're complaining about the fact that they've been here for now, one of them at least, a four-month stint, and is just wanting to be desperately reassigned. General work banter.

TALIESIN: This is not a happy place.

MATT: You do hear some voices muffled from down the staircase, but, I would say even at this distance, you're not able-- even with-- like you can hear them talking through the stone, but you can't make out any words. I know you rolled super high, but like, they're a floor below you and you're not Superman.

TALIESIN: Is it heated or is it just-- can I discern the general nature of the-- like, is it happy? Just a conversation.

MATT: Just a conversation. And it's short, because then you immediately begin to hear a number of sets of footsteps--

TALIESIN: They're coming.

MATT: --coming up the stairs. You see rise back up the Martinet, and behind you see the now twice familiar face of Master Trent Ikithon approach. (as Trent) "Well, so glad you all were able to join us. I've been notified of your arrival and we have prepared the demonstration, if you would please follow."

TRAVIS: How old is this dude again?

MATT: He looks to be in his sixties or seventies, somewhere in that range. He's thin, older, human, skin is a bit jaundiced. You know, some visible liver spots across the forehead. You know, long, gray thinning hair, and dressed in very, very nice robes with like almost like a velvet mantle over top of it that has trim put into it. It's very-- it's a little ostentatious for him being on a business day, but you know, he likes to dress up.

TRAVIS: Sure. Okay.

MATT: You guys follow suit?

TRAVIS: Yep. SAM: Sure.

MATT: All right. You are led down beneath the ground floor into a spiral staircase that comes to a locked and closed door. Ludinus approaches and just raises his hand, and with a loud knocking sound the door (imitates creaking) opens. Immediately the smell that catches you is familiar. It's like a strange, cold, ozone-type smell. It reminds you of the sensory awareness that would happen when you would reach your consciousness into the beacon. As you step into the chamber, this is a laboratory. This is specifically an arcane laboratory. You can see all manner of bookshelves around. There are numerous tables with glass vials and alchemical supplies that are affixed to each other with copper coils and long liquid-carrying tubes that release into heavy vials and liquid containers. You can see materials that are locked away and kept under glass along a number of distant shelves on the far wall. There is a single chandelier in the center of the room from the 15-foot tall ceiling that dangles down and gives off a bright white light that gives a fairly consistent true-color look to the interior of the chamber. In the center, you see a familiar-looking platinum-colored tripod that sits loosely near from underneath the– not perfectly under, but near underneath where the chandelier hangs, and to two sides you see two individuals that are currently flanking it from side to side. One of them you see is a female halfling with shorter cut hair, kind of a tense stare, arms crossed, wearing sleeveless leather armor with intricate tattoos across each arm that have a very maze-like geometric pattern to them. The other, you see, is a tall man, short black hair, kind of built, thick, in a dark piece of clothing that covers most of his upper body, leather gauntlets, a satchel over one shoulder and is also equally looking stern at you as you enter.

LIAM: Is it him?

MATT: Make a perception check.

SAM: "Him."

LAURA: His friend, is he his friend?

LIAM: 22.

MATT: 22? It's been awhile, but yeah.

LAURA: It's the guy, it's the guy that he described.

MARISHA: His best friend.

SAM: Oh, oh, oh, that guy.

MATT: As you all step inside, both of them acknowledge your entrance and take a step back as Trent takes the center stage, if you will, of the chamber. "So you have inquired as to this beacon, this relic, to confirm its existence. So as Ludinus has told me, you all can approach and confirm for yourself."

SAM: May we touch it?

MATT: "If you wish, yes."

MARISHA: Yep, I go up there. I also, as we walk up, just want to start casing the place a little bit. Any research papers, any notebooks, any signs of anything nearby?

MATT: Make a perception check. SAM: I'm going to touch it.

MATT: Hm?

SAM: I'm going to touch the beacon, I guess.

LAURA: The beacon is on top of the tripod?

MATT: On top of the tripod.

MARISHA: 16.

MATT: 16. You would imagine a chamber like this, especially as outfitted with the materials for research would have books and journals and notes everywhere. Completely absent of any of it, almost like it was recently cleared.

TRAVIS: How many doors and entry and exits are there in this room?

MATT: There's the room you entered and there is a door on the opposite wall, but you do not know where it goes.

LAURA: Mr. Icky-thong.

MATT: "Yes."

LAURA: How long have you had this relic?

MATT: "But a few weeks. We uncovered it, and we've been researching the extent of what it's capable of. With the rising conflict, we came to understand that this was one of the beacons that was so important to the Dynasty, and as this was something that could be used as a weapon against us, it was necessary for us to ascertain information about how dangerous it would be, or if it could be used in our stead. Thankfully, that does not appear to be the case. It seems to be more important for them on a faith-based level, and as such, does not serve much of a continued purpose for us. Hence the lack of interest in maintaining it under our banner."

ASHLEY: Where did you--

LIAM: So it is not--

ASHLEY: Where did you uncover it?

MATT: "What do you mean?"

ASHLEY: Well, where did you, you said you uncovered it, you found it?

MATT: "From what we understand, the relics that the Dynasty themselves have acquired are not the only beacons in his world. So this was uncovered as part of a archeological dig outside of Pride's Call."

LAURA: Mm, mm, mm, mm-hmm.

MATT: "But we are interested in returning it to those that have more use of it than we would."

LAURA: That's very kind of you.

TALIESIN: So this was uncovered there a few weeks ago?

MATT: "It was, yes. You are welcome to go and confirm that with the archeologists of Pride's Call as well."

TALIESIN: Excellent.

LAURA: I bet they totally would cooperate--

TALIESIN: Insight check for every fucking thing this guy says.

MATT: Yeah, make an insight check.

MARISHA: Can I assist?

LAURA: I feel like we don't even need to insight check this, he's so full of shit!

TALIESIN: It's okay. 23.

MATT: 23? Okay.

TRAVIS: Did you roll with advantage?

MARISHA: Can I assist?

TALIESIN: Oh, I did not roll with advantage.

MATT: If you'd like to assist, sure.

MARISHA: Uh-huh, uh-huh.

TALIESIN: 24.

MATT: All right, one point.

MARISHA: Ooh, yeah.

SAM: So many whispers tonight, guys.

MARISHA: Fucking liar! Okay, wait. There was news about Pride's Call back a long time ago.

TRAVIS: Had to do with Obann.

SAM: Guys, this isn't combat, but Dwarven Forge exists, just so you know.

LIAM: At all times.

SAM: At all times, they currently are a company that exists at dwarvenforge.com.

MARISHA: To Pride's Call.

ASHLEY: Pride's Call.

SAM: Pride's Call, where's that?

TRAVIS: Right here.

MARISHA: On the ocean, right? Oh, it's in the mountains.

LAURA: That's over by where your family lives, right?

MATT: It's on the other side of the mountain range of the Cyrios Mountains from Kamordah. It's a largely dwarven city.

MARISHA: Right, right, right, right.

LIAM: "So you have found this object not to be dangerous." And I let my eyes rest on Eadwulf's for a moment. "Is it of any use? Surely you have learned something."

MATT: "It would be of use, yes. But what we've gleaned, research-wise– what use it would have would not be as important as stemming the tide of blood that continues to flow because of this conflict."

LIAM: Agreed.

TALIESIN: Did you find the tripod with it? This thing that it's sitting on?

MATT: "No. This was a means of keeping it safe and easy to research within our chamber."

MARISHA: Oh, really

TALIESIN: I'm curious. How? How does it work? We know about the thingie. What's this tripod thingie do?

MATT: "Well, when you are–" He goes and reaches up. You've touched it, right?

SAM: Yeah, is that okay?

MATT: Yeah. You touch it. It very much resembles, feels like, and–

SAM: I was going to try to let it zonk me in.

MATT: Okay. You go ahead and focus in–

MARISHA: Doesn't it take like a minute?

MATT: It does. So you begin this process. Ikithon goes, "Well, you see, when you are taking something that is– you are uncertain, necessarily, of how caustic, or how volatile it may be–"

TALIESIN: Caustic–? Oh, okay, I know that one.

MATT: "How bad it might possibly end up."

TALIESIN: I'm with you.

MARISHA: So you made that?

MATT: "Yes." He turns and sees– he was going to reach for it, but then sees Nott currently in the process, and goes, "(chuckles) You've seen this before, then."

LAURA: What? No. What?

MARISHA: We've heard rumors.

ASHLEY: I have not seen it before.

MATT: "I'm just finding it curious that you have come in to confirm that something exists, that you had not known it exists until you heard of it not but the other day, and then arrive and immediately know exactly how to extend towards this device."

LIAM: By the act of touching? She's a curious girl.

MATT: "I think you should know me better than to assume that I do not see intent where it's supposed to be, Bren. But I'm just curious if you have encountered such a device before. Your curiosity matches my own. And–"

TALIESIN: How did you invent this tripod thingie? It's kind of cool.

MATT: "We had it made. It's three broads of metal."

TALIESIN: No, I mean, but it's-- I mean, so you just had it made in the last couple weeks.

MATT: "Yes, we have that capability."

MARISHA: Is it one of a kind?

MATT: "Tripods? No, they're used for many different devices."

MARISHA: Yeah, but that's like a very specific tripod for a very specific shape.

MATT: (looking a little haunted) "Okay. Are you offended by its shape? I could alter it for you if you'd like."

LAURA: Whoa.

MATT: And he takes his hand and begins to manipulate with his fingers, and while you're concentrating on it, you watch as the tripod begins to bow and twist a bit, kind of almost forming into a triple helix-like formation, and Nott, you actually are pulled away from connecting with it. You do not finish the process."

SAM: Did it feel like it was going the right way?

MATT: It did.

SAM: Okay, that's all.

MATT: And then it warps back, and he says, "You understand at a certain point of arcane capabilities, such creations are relatively paltry tricks."

MARISHA: Oh, of course. I also kind of recognize a certain artist's touch to these things. You know, and it's just very unique, what you made there.

MATT: "Hmm. Have you seen them elsewhere before?"

MARISHA: Something reminiscent in Zadash, yeah.

MATT: "Interesting."

MARISHA: You get to Zadash much, Trent?

MATT: "Not terribly often. I am very busy up here."

SAM: (Metagaming Pigeon) It wasn't in Zadash.

MARISHA: Hm?

SAM: It wasn't in Zadash.

TRAVIS: Where was it?

SAM: Felderwin.

MARISHA: But they had the beacon in Zadash.

ASHLEY: There was a dig going on already? I'm just getting clear–

MATT: "There was a sinkhole that was discovered decades ago on the outskirts of Pride's Call, that was found to lead to deep beneath the earth an Arcanum ruin. That has been slow going excavation that has been purposely and intently supervised by the Assembly since its discovery, and it was in this ruin that the beacon was discovered. We do not know if it was already part of the ruin, or it was through some sort of chance that the two had overlapped. But–"

TALIESIN: Have you figured out at all how it works?

MATT: "It has some strange arcane properties that are unlike things that we've encountered in some of our research."

TALIESIN: Have you ever seen an object like this before? Anything like this before?

MATT: "No. This is beyond our purview. At least in my years on Exandria."

ASHLEY: You are so very excited that you found it.

MATT: "How would I not be? Is it not curious? Please, understand, I would love very much to continue to research such an artifact, but once again, it's about being the bigger man."

LIAM: Tell us a bit more. Knowledge is power, you know that.

MATT: "It is."

LIAM: These properties - what are they?

MATT: Make a deception check for me.

LIAM: 14.

MATT: His gaze seems to almost to reach into you in that cold and intrusive way, reading between the words and the intent, and you see a smile creep across his face. "I don't think it's anything you wouldn't already know. But I trust, for all of those present, it seems to have some roots in familiar magics that twist with the nature of matter and gravity, entropy, time, to a certain extent. Probability, possibility. It is very intriguing, though the nature of this magic itself is challenging to harness."

(Laura sneezes)

MARISHA and TALIESIN: Bless you.

LAURA: Excuse me.

TRAVIS: I'm surprised to hear a man of your intellect and intrigue is ready to part with such a device that the Dynasty seems to hold so much stock in. Curious, have you been able to take anything from it, or imbue any objects with its twisting of matter and reality?

MATT: "Unfortunately there has not been enough time. But should this go well, should this– your– endeavor with the Dynasty be successful, one would hope that this could be the beginning of a partnership, even. Perhaps if us and the Dynasty can cross these gaps of mistrust and misinformation, instead we can learn so much from each other."

TALIESIN: Are there books in this room?

MATT: There are many books in this room.

SAM: Oh. I thought you said everything was cleared.

MATT: There are books on the walls. There are no notes, journals, or anything that looks like research, but there are bookshelves.

TALIESIN: Do you have any of your research in this room right now that we could perhaps just take a quick look at, see where you've gotten with it?

MATT: "No. And I respectfully was under the impression you were here to inspect this device. I've just met you. And our research is our own."

TRAVIS: Of course. We've inspected the item. It seems to be as you claim, which will help. We can say we've seen it with our own eyes.

MATT: "Good. Good."

TRAVIS: This will be a dangerous, dangerous task. Perhaps if, I don't know, one of your more trusted were to accompany us... I don't know. Is there anyone you might want to have come with us?

SAM: What do you think, Caleb?

LIAM: I have not been a part of this for a very long time. I wouldn't presume to know. Who would I trust now?

MATT: "Well. I think based on what we know of your dealings in Xhorhas, you would have a better chance of doing this without the presence of any of my trusted operatives."

LAURA: But you're so charming. Wouldn't you want to come yourself and charm the pants off everyone there?

MATT: "I doubt the Assembly would be as welcomed."

TALIESIN: I would say if there's any other information you feel that we should know, just so that all cards are on the table, now would be the time to put forward anything that might be missing from this story and anything that when we are asked questions, that we will be able to fill in the answers for.

MATT: "Certainly."

LIAM: I think he's right, though. His previous poking about in the Dynasty did not end well.

MATT: "You misunderstand. I have not myself traveled to the Dynasty."

LIAM: No, you don't do that. You don't need to. You have help for that. Always help for that.

MATT: "Not everyone is as helpful." (long pause) "Anyway."

TRAVIS: Yes.

MATT: "I believe everything is situated, Ludinus?" "Very much so. "Thank you, Master Ikithon. Once again, ensure that this is well-protected. I'm sure there would be outside forces very interested in such research and such a device, and that would be a terrible house of cards to befall these tense negotiations."

TRAVIS: Can I ask, is your dude that's across the room, your friend, is he wearing the same thing around his neck that you are?

MATT: Make a perception check.

LIAM: I mean, mine was always hidden under clothes.

TRAVIS: 17.

MATT: 17? You don't see anything.

TRAVIS: I'd love to have one of those.

MARISHA: Yeah, they're pretty cool.

MATT: "Mighty Nein, are you sufficiently happy?"

TRAVIS: We are satisfied.

TALIESIN: For the moment.

MATT: "Good. Thank you, Master Trent." "Of course, and good luck."

TRAVIS: So terribly sorry. Your two associates. I forgot to ask their names.

MATT: "My apologies. I am usually much more cordial than this. You caught me in the middle of my work mode. This is Owelia," pointing to the halfling.

SAM: Uwellia?

MATT: "Owelia. She is one of my more recent students, recently graduated. And this is Eadwulf, who is a long time associate and one of favorite associates. I believe you two already know each other." And Eadwulf across the way is just (arms crossed, nods expressionlessly).

LAURA: What do his arms look like?

MATT: They're covered, currently. There's like a black cotton cloth shirt with leather gauntlets that are over it. Arms are covered. Pretty wide shoulders. For an individual that came to the Soltryce Academy and your usual standard expectation of mages... he's a bigger guy.

TRAVIS: We're going to kill them all right now, right? We're going to kick this thing off right now?

TALIESIN: Rolling initiative.

MATT: Ludinus steps into this tension and goes, "Well, I think we should find our way to the next endeavor. Let us be off."

MARISHA: Hey, Trent.

MATT: "Yes."

MARISHA: You might want to talk to Caduceus about getting some tea that might help stimulate your memory. Keep a little bit sharper, because we actually have met before.

MATT: "Oh, don't think I don't remember."

MARISHA: Oh, so now I know you were lying.

MATT: "I do not believe there was a lie. I congratulated you on your victory in the pit."

MARISHA: You seemed to just misplace that we had all met previously a moment ago.

MATT: "I only met a handful of you."

ASHLEY: I put my hand on the handle of my blade.

MATT: "And you, apparently, have been following an intriguing path on your own, as well. I knew there was something special about you. Anyway. We must continue preparations for the delivery should this go well. Have a good day."

LAURA: Can you read minds?

MATT: "Can I read minds?"

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: "Can you?"

LAURA: Can you?

MATT: "You're a strange one. Are you reading my mind right now?"

LAURA: I'm trying to give you some thoughts. Tell me the first thing you think.

MATT: "I think it's time we said goodbye."

LAURA: He didn't want to say it.

MATT: Ludinus is like, "(clears throat) Shall we?"

SAM: Yes, yes.

TALIESIN: Please.

LIAM: Wulf. It's good to see you again.

MATT: "It's good to see you, too. It's been some time. You look good."

LIAM: Let's go.

MATT: You head back up the stairs. You hear the door (slams, locks) behind you, and as you reach the landing above where the guards are, the Martinet turns and goes, "My apologies for the tension. I was afraid, given the history, things would be a bit emotional. Trent is a challenging individual. He has much utility, and has been a long-standing and... important member of the Assembly. But he is challenging."

LIAM: Have you ever–

LAURA: He does bad things.

LIAM: Have you ever sat in on any of his lessons?

MATT: "I've not sat in on them specifically. But he does what he deems necessary. Not all things necessary are easy."

TALIESIN: Do you have an opinion on any of the conversation that you just heard?

MATT: "In regards to...?"

TALIESIN: Feelings? Thoughts? Candid emotion?

MATT: "I think he's not being entirely forthright with his knowledge or information about this, but I think we have more pressing matters. To press this individual right now would be a rabbit hole that would distract from something that is far more reaching, if you will. I can always deal with Trent after the fact."

ASHLEY: Let us know when you do that. Because I would like to help. If you need to get rid of him in any way.

MATT: "(chuckles) There are far more useful ways of dealing with useful individuals than just getting rid of them."

LAURA: Are you a lot more powerful than him?

MATT: "It's challenging to compare power in the Assembly. We all have our unique talents."

LAURA: Are you being humble?

MATT: "I'm being honest."

TALIESIN: Where do you think we should go next?

MATT: "Well, if you have any preparations to make, anything you need to do, the timeline is yours. I am not stringently pressing upon you the necessity of any due date for its arrival, but do know time is of the essence."

TALIESIN: We– I feel like I would like a moment to talk amongst ourselves really quickly, but I don't know if I feel comfortable having that conversation here.

SAM: Can you teleport us back to the city center?

MATT: "I can."

TALIESIN: Or somewhere else, maybe?

LAURA: Can you teleport anywhere?

MATT: "I can teleport many places."

LAURA: Because you did it like really fast and like it looked really cool when you did it and stuff. You must be really powerful.

MATT: "Do you have a particular request where to be taken?"

LAURA: No, I'm just saying, seeing other people try to do it, but they almost like bamfed us into trees or rocks or something. And you were just like, Whoosh, and we're in like the grass.

MATT: "It's easier the more familiar you are with the location."

LAURA: Oh.

MATT: Essek is scrying and going, Fuck you—

MARISHA: I know.

TRAVIS: One time!

SAM: I think we still have business in Rexxentrum, no?

MATT: "Then we can return."

LIAM: We are on our own timeline, you're saying. Obviously speed is of the essence, but–

LAURA: What is the date?

MATT: If you're requesting about the immediacy of Travelercon, you have about a month.

LAURA: Still. We got about a month still?

MATT: You got a month. It's around the corner. It's around the corner.

LAURA: But we've got to get the ship, we've got to get...

SAM: Did you get your Advent calendar for TravelerCon?

TALIESIN: Just dicks. Just dicks in boxes.

SAM: Every box is full of dicks.

TRAVIS: I do admit, I'm not entirely familiar with Rexxentrum. Are there shops of arcane nature, or perhaps somewhere where we might be able to peruse items that will help us?

MATT: "If you're enquiring about potions and things that might be of aid, there are a– I can think of a place that might be of help to you. Most places are currently facilitating..."

TRAVIS: The war effort?

MATT: "The war effort. The front lines. And many of the artifacts which we've had commissioned are in transit to their destination."

TRAVIS: Perhaps there is a stock set aside for the Empire's more clandestine efforts?

MATT: "What are you planning to do at the negotiation?"

TRAVIS: I don't know. I like options.

MATT: "I'm curious. Having not known what your particular skill set is beyond apparently a honeyed tongue, you carry no weapon on you. But you do seem to carry a curious symbol of Melora on your person, I've noticed, as I'm walking."

TRAVIS: I am new to Melora's light and guidance. She has served me well and I hope to return the favor.

MATT: "Well, you seem to have endured and survived in a great challenge. What would you consider to be your most dangerous strength?"

TRAVIS: Goodness.

SAM: His heart.

TRAVIS: "Well, I am good with a sword." And I'll summon the Star Razor.

MATT: As it appears in his hand, he kind of takes a step back, and looks down, eyes wide and nodding with a very genuine look of being impressed and goes, "Well, based on the arms you carry, I don't see we would have anything to offer. You seem pretty well outfitted.

TRAVIS: We are. Some of my friends like to shop.

MATT: "Well. Perhaps then the Cryptic Collection, in Rexxentrum. Tell Keona that Ludinus sends his regards. Shall we?"

SAM: Yes, let's away.

MATT: He bends the same, similar, circle inscription in the air, and as it expands and pulls all of you into its center, it thrusts you through again, landing at the exterior base of his tower in the Shimmer Ward of Rexxentrum once more.

TRAVIS: Very impressive. Very impressive.

SAM: Are we all clapping?

MATT: "You do not have to clap, it's all right. "

TALIESIN: I feel it's appropriate.

MATT: "Anyway."

LAURA: I mean, how often do you really get to show off your power? Like most people are probably used to seeing it, so it's not as impressive anymore. But like, we've never seen anything like it, so, you know...

MATT: "It's entirely off-putting how disarmingly charming you are. I genuinely do not know how to react. Take that as a compliment."

TALIESIN: I suppose we'll reconvene...

SAM: We'll call you when things are progressing.

TALIESIN: We'll get ourselves together and we'll let you know when it's time. If that's all right.

MATT: "Very well. You know where to find me."

LAURA: Thank you for your help.

MARISHA: Do we come knock on your candle or something?

LAURA: We'll send you a message.

MARISHA: We'll send you a message.

MATT: "Much easier."

SAM: Thank you so much for the trip.

MATT: "Of course." And he walks around the edge of his tower out of sight.

LAURA: Are you okay, Caleb?

LIAM: ...I don't know.

ASHLEY: I don't like him at all.

TALIESIN: No.

TRAVIS: Which one? Trent, or this one?

LAURA: Well, the Martinet's really actually pretty cool. I like him.

SAM: Remember, he held my husband prisoner.

LAURA: That was him?

SAM: Yeah.

LIAM: He was likely–

MARISHA: He's also like totally a religious bigoted asshole who fucking–

TRAVIS: We've walked away at this point.

MARISHA: Yeah, we're out, by the way.

MATT: Note of interest. Wildmother? Not legal in the Empire. But did not call you on it.

LAURA: He's just better at lieing.

TRAVIS: Really?

MATT: He seemed unfazed.

LAURA: I like him. I mean, if he wasn't such a–

TRAVIS: There's only a few deities--

MATT: There's only a handful that are legal within the Empire.

TALIESIN: Trent didn't-- I've never-- I've never seen another person walk so daintily around the truth.

LAURA: Ugh.

TALIESIN: I wouldn't even know what he looked like when he was lying.

MARISHA: I mean, he lied so many times, like openly.

TALIESIN: He didn't lie.

LAURA: That's what you do. Did you see? I just asked him one stupid little question and he went on this long-ass story. Like, that's how you know someone's lying, they give you all these details you didn't ask for.

MARISHA: We've seen him in Zadash multiple times, and he's like, "Meh, I don't go to Zadash," and then you're just like, "I've never met you before," and then I called him on it, and he's like, "What are you talking about?" He sucks.

TALIESIN: I was following him, he technically didn't really, (sighs).

LAURA: Lie?

TALIESIN: Nope.

LAURA: He just spoke around the truth.

TALIESIN: Yep.

MARISHA: He's like me, but better at it. Fucking asshole.

TRAVIS: He's not focused on this stage. I think can all agree on that, yes?

LIAM: Ikithon is more obvious, but Da'leth was not entirely truthful with us, either.

MARISHA: Mm-mm.

TALIESIN: Are we, yeah.

ASHLEY: I don't mean to pry, Caleb, but he was a teacher for you?

LIAM: I am from here, near here.

ASHLEY: I gathered that much.

LIAM: I studied here. Ikithon was one of many teachers, and then he became my main teacher. Private lessons. You've missed so much.

ASHLEY: Yeah, I know.

LAURA: Did he ever seem, like, nice to you, or was he always weird?

LIAM: Sometimes. Sometimes, after being particularly harsh, he would apologize after.

ASHLEY: That can be very confusing.

MARISHA: It's fucked up. Especially if you have no one else to go to.

LIAM: We should not take anything they said at face value, obviously. It's pretty clear that we are being used as a pawn.

LAURA: Yeah.

LIAM: We have to be very careful.

LAURA: I feel like they've done something to the beacon. I feel like they had to have done something.

TRAVIS: Of course they have.

MARISHA: Yeah, did you get your thing? Did you get it?

SAM: No, no, I was interrupted, but it certainly felt real. It's not a decoy or anything. It's the real deal. At least from what I felt.

MARISHA: From when we witnessed the Zauber Spire get attacked, and we saw those flying wizard battles and the Kryn and shit.

LIAM and MATT: One of them was Ikithon. You didn't recognize the other.

TRAVIS: (nervous laugh) Cool.

MARISHA: But like, now that we've met other people in the Assembly, can we think back? Did, like-- the Martinet has a cane, you mentioned one of them had a staff or something. Has there been any identifying things that we can remember?

LIAM: They all look different. One of them is an earth genasi, and--

MARISHA: Right, that's what I'm saying. Is there something we didn't recognize at the time, but now looking back, where it feels like this person?

MATT: Make an intelligence check.

TRAVIS: Don't you roll that blue one, don't you touch that damn thing.

LAURA: Can I Guidance you?

MATT: You wouldn't know about this.

LAURA: But you're thinking so hard!

MATT: (laughs) This is just recalling information.

TRAVIS: Trying to decide whether to gamble on a fart or not.

MARISHA: All right, all right, all right. 19.

MATT: The other figure, best that you can recall and what little bit you saw--

MARISHA: 18.

MATT: Seemed to resemble or Oremid Hass.

LAURA: Who? Oremid Hass?

MARISHA: Oremid Hass.

MATT: Who, of which that school is-- he's the headmaster of the Hall of Erudition, which is the school that was attacked.

MARISHA: I mean, we dealt with him a decent amount, too.

TALIESIN: They didn't mention that they were experimenting with this thing earlier, they didn't mention that they used to have another one.

LAURA: No, they were lying.

LIAM: Of course.

TALIESIN: So here's the question. Are we going to put our chips on this Ludinus? And if we are going to put our chips, are we really going to do it?

SAM: I mean, in fairness to them, they told us the truth. They know we're going to go talk to the Bright Queen. They don't want us to say, "hey, Bright Queen, these fuckers stole the last one from you, and they stole another one from you." They don't want us to have that information and give it to the Bright Queen.

TALIESIN: That's what she already thinks, though.

SAM: Thinks, but may not be able to prove.

LIAM: Also, how do we use this situation?

TALIESIN: I don't know if it matters.

LIAM: To reach what we want?

SAM: Well, ultimately we do want both sides to talk.

TRAVIS: We do.

LIAM: Yes, but they are being disingenuous here. They are not being forthright. They want to use this for something that we are not seeing yet. And we can be honest-- I'm sorry, Fjord.

TRAVIS: No, no, that's okay. Do we think the Empire is aware of where the Bright Queen is? Are they using us as a--

MARISHA: Way to find her?

TRAVIS: Yes. Something to flush them out. To follow us.

MARISHA: Rosohna is famously the capital of Xhorhas.

MATT: There isn't a mystery of where Rosohna is.

LIAM: It's the Kremlin.

MATT: Yeah. It's just...

TRAVIS: Far,

MATT: Far and well-guarded.

MARISHA: I mean, there were assassins trying to invade Rosohna while we were there.

MATT: Scourgers already attacked it. It's not like it's a mystery.

LIAM: We're in the middle. We could certainly try and take this beacon to them, and inspect it and try to make sure that we are not being used. But it's not going to lead to peace.

MARISHA: They mentioned us corroborating their story with the architects at Pride's Call. I mean, of course they could have given those dwarves any amount of money to pay them off–

LAURA: Maybe they changed their memory.

MARISHA: Or just change their memory. But we could try and beat them at the only handle that they've potentially given us, and go investigate that.

TALIESIN: There is another hand to play. We could sit and cast a truth spell on Ludinus, and just try to have a bit of a frank conversation, with the understanding that we both get to ask questions, and sometimes that answer's going to be, "I'm not comfortable answering that."

TRAVIS: I don't know if he would agree to that.

TALIESIN: He might.

LAURA: I don't think he would.

TALIESIN: And as long as we're okay with him occasionally saying, "I'm not going to answer that." For whatever that's worth.

SAM: I can't see him agreeing to that.

LIAM: Or if he did, he would just pass on the questions that he doesn't want to answer.

TALIESIN: But we would know that when he is being forthright, he is being forthright.

TRAVIS: It's worth a shot. I think we should go to the Cryptic Collection and see what we can find in this town, perhaps try our luck with Ludinus, and I actually like Beau's idea. We might as well see what we can find in Pride's Call before we just jump into another continent– sorry, Empire, Dynasty.

MARISHA: I mean, if they did alter memories or pay them off or do something, maybe someone saw something and can tell us something. I don't know.

TRAVIS: Anyone up for shopping?

MARISHA: Yeah.

SAM: Sure. You always ask that.

MARISHA: Therapy shop! Therapy shop!

TALIESIN: That is the first time I've ever heard Travis say, "Anyone up for shopping?" by the way. I'm marking the occasion.

MATT: Yeah. I think everyone has to drink.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: All right. So. I would say, while you do not know where this place is, asking around, the right people, you eventually get sent towards the Court of Colors, which is in the Tangles section of the city. You find, nestled in the shaded gap between two large warehouses, that the alleyway ends not in a cul-de-sac or come to an abrupt stop at another building. Instead it ends in a humble if somewhat creepy single-story building of rustic, weathered wood, and a tiled roof decorated with numerous brass and iron chimes, wind instruments, and charms dangling from the edges.

TALIESIN: That's pretty nice.

MATT: Within this long back, shotgun-style structure, you walk in to find a warm, strangely humid apothecary, and minor magical relic store. The interior itself is-- I'm trying to find the proper--

LAURA: What is the name? The Cultivated--?

MATT and SAM: The Cryptic Collection.

LAURA: The Cryptic Collection.

MATT: You see a number of cages hanging from the top of the entryway and small corner elements that are all moss-covered, and just glancing over the side, you can see rats kept in one, you can see ravens in another, an owl in the back. General familiar-type creatures being kept.

MARISHA: What's the owl look like? Does it look like fucking Thaddeus?

MATT: Make a perception check.

SAM: It's definitely Thaddeus.

TALIESIN: I like that you give a side-eye to every owl we ever meet.

MARISHA: Fuck, it's just perception?

MATT: Yeah.

MARISHA: Seven.

MATT: It's fine, it's an owl, it's not Thaddeus.

MARISHA: Well. (Matt and Marisha laughing) If it was, though.

MATT: If it was, that'd be hilarious.

LIAM: It's the Crawling King.

TRAVIS: (snarling)

MATT: (laughs)

TRAVIS: It's gnawing at the bars.

TALIESIN: We're not ready to fight that. Yeah, yeah. Four more levels minimum.

MATT: But as you move through the entryway, you can see some of the ravens start cawing for a moment, the rats start squeaking, acknowledging the arrival of something strange and new.

LAURA: I hold onto Sprinkle. Don't worry.

SAM: "Leave me in one of the cages! Please!"

MATT: You see across some of the nearby tables chiseled and polished bones are on display, marked with runes and decorative carvings. You can see a femur that has been made into some sort of a flute-like instrument. The entire room smells of musty earth and mildewed leather, yet with every few steps the smells seem to change into something else entirely. It's a very surreal corner to find lost in the middle of the Court of Colors region of Rexxentrum. As the birds and creatures start getting louder and louder, you can see on the opposite end a curtain, that pulls to the side, and a figure comes out, and as it does they all get quiet. You see a half-elven woman in her fifties or so, heavy-set with tangled dirty blond hair, and this wide smile of teeth that are too white for the somewhat dirty and disheveled exterior that she holds. She steps forward, arms behind her back. "Hello. Welcome to the Cryptic Collection. My name is Keona the Keen. Can I help you?"

MARISHA: She's my favorite already.

TRAVIS: Keona, we are first-time purveyors of your establishment.

MATT: "Apparently."

LAURA: Martinet Lu-lu-lu– he sent us. He sends his regards.

TRAVIS: Martinet Ludinus Da'leth.

MATT: "The Martinet sent you here?"

SAM: He said you might have some potions and fancy magic things for us.

MATT: "We just might." She puts her arms out.

LAURA: What do her hands look like?

MATT: Her fingers are longer than they should be for a standard half-elf. Probably about an inch to an inch and a half longer. They're thin, and the nails themselves extend--

SAM: Are they press-on nails?

TALIESIN: Press-on fingers.

MATT: Yes. (laughing)

TRAVIS: Are there little paintings on each of them?

LIAM: Let me just call the Martinet.

(laughter)

TRAVIS: I love that.

MATT: It's a little unsettling. It's not hag level. She's not, but it's just different and strange.

TRAVIS: Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

MATT: "So, what are you looking for? We have a few curiosities. Times have been busy, so we're a bit plucked clean, but..."

TRAVIS: Perhaps the more rare, the better. Items of defense or offense.

MATT: "Oh." She starts putting away a small satchel.

TALIESIN: I was going to talk about potions and diamonds, but what is this? I'm going to pick up the femur and show it.

LAURA: I'm just drawing her in my book, like--

(laughter)

SAM: A hand study?

MATT: "I call that a cruzela. It's an original instrument. Let me show you."

LAURA: Ooh!

MATT: She reaches out and takes it, the fingers (slurping) wrap around.

SAM: Ooh!

MATT: Bring it back. (Laura laughing) As she holds it, like, her hands don't touch it, because her fingers have to go out far to touch, and there are number of flute holes all alongside it, and she blows in. You're expecting music, and instead this like high pitched (light screeching), this weird wail sound comes out, and as she transitions her fingers, it glides unnaturally from sound to sound. You know the death whistle sound?

TALIESIN: Bless you.

MATT: It's not as aggressive as that, but it is not music in a classic sense. It's very unsettling.

TRAVIS: How much audible damage to we take?

MATT: Let's see here. (laughter) And hands it back to you.

TALIESIN: That's fascinating.

LAURA: What does it do?

MATT: "It makes music."

LAURA: Oh.

MATT: "50 gold, if you're interested."

TALIESIN: I'm very interested.

MATT: "Good, good." (Marisha laughing)

TALIESIN: What else do you got? This is exciting.

MATT: "Well," she takes the satchel back up and opens it up, and there are four potions in there. There's a potion of healing, two potions of greater healing, and a potion of superior healing.

TRAVIS: One, two, and one.

MATT: Yes.

TALIESIN: And no diamonds, I assume, either.

TRAVIS: We have to ask.

MATT: No diamonds in that one.

TALIESIN: That's fair. We're all right, just not great.

LAURA: Oh, oh, oh! Do you have a fancy bowl?

SAM: A what?

MATT: "A fancy bow?"

LAURA: A fancy bowl.

MATT: "Bowl!"

SAM: You need that? For what?

MATT: "I think I can provide that. What kind of bowl are you looking for? And diamonds I can also acquire, though I may have to remove them from their setting, depending on how expensive you're looking?"

TALIESIN: Well, it depends on what you got, and I, honestly, I'm still just sort of captivated with this thing. What other-- you seem to have taste.

MATT: "Thank you."

TALIESIN: I'm just curious if you got anything else so impressive just hanging around.

MATT: "Oh, have you got some time, then?"

TALIESIN: Now I do.

MATT: "(laughs excitedly)"

TRAVIS: Ha! Most aroused Caduceus has ever been.

MARISHA: Yeah, I know, yeah.

MATT: "The standard potion of healing is 50 gold pieces, the greater 150, and the superiors 450. These are prices as a friend of Ludinus'."

TRAVIS: Understood. Thank you for that.

LAURA: A gem-encrusted bowl. A bowl with gem crusting.

SAM: Crusty gems.

MATT: "Crusty gems on a bowl? To what worth are you looking for?"

LAURA: 1000 gold.

MATT: "1000. I do not have that at the moment, but if you give me a couple days, I can probably procure something similar."

LAURA: I think I have that much money. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I know, but I-- I have a similar amount. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

TRAVIS: Certainly take all of those healing potions. It's 114 gold each.

MARISHA: Done.

SAM: We're all chipping in?

LAURA: We're all chipping in.

TALIESIN: 114?

TRAVIS: Gold.

TALIESIN: And I'm just throw down the 50 for the flute. Because I need that.

MATT: Go for it.

TALIESIN: I need that. 114, that's 164 gold. But I want to see what else you got.

MATT: "This," as she pulls up this small black marble about that big. Sets it out, it's a black-gray color. "There was a larger set, but, I've had a couple of break-ins and had to use a few of them, but these are referred to as beads of force. You're unhappy with something, you throw it at it, and it becomes not a problem for a short time."

MARISHA: How much?

TRAVIS: Beads of force?

SAM: Beads of force.

MATT: "250, but I only have one."

MARISHA: And that's with, like, the friend deal?

MATT: "Yes."

LAURA: That's a good deal.

MARISHA: Yeah, I'll take it.

MATT: "All right."

MARISHA: 250, is that what you said?

MATT: 250.

LIAM: Do you have any gemstones? Do you have any amber?

MATT: "There is amber, yes, I can provide amber. How much are you looking?"

LIAM: I would like five individual pieces, a minimum of... 200 gold's worth.

MATT: "All right."

LIAM: Roughly.

MATT: "That can be provided." She goes behind the curtain for a bit and comes back, and has in her hand, her arm and her fingers unfurl slowly, and in the palm, you can see these-- they're different sizes, but they're all very large and polished pieces of amber. Lets them cascade onto the table in front.

LIAM: I slide 200 gold over.

MATT: She scoops them in.

TALIESIN: If you have a 350 gold piece diamond, or a 500 gold piece diamond, or one of each, we would happily take it.

MATT: "I have a 350 gold piece."

TALIESIN: We'll take it.

MATT: "That I can handle."

TALIESIN: You want that one?

MATT: Goes and retrieves such a diamond for you. It's not cut. It's a larger diamond, but it's uncut, which is why the price isn't full. It's a little rough, but it'll work for any sort of, you know, material component elements you require.

TALIESIN: I know you've got platinum, never mind.

MATT: "And this is the-- this is the interesting one."

SAM: Oh.

MATT: "This is hard to find. It requires some creativity. (excited exhale)," And sets this small vial down. Now this here in particular, you see in this jar, it's a larger vial or a small jar. There is this viscous, milky fluid in it that has a mercury-type movement to it, but it is a milky-white color. "This is an adhesive. When it's placed between two objects, they bond. Forever."

LAURA: Like, if we put it, like, some on me and some on Nott, and then we stood next to each other, we went to permanently be together forever?

MATT: "If you wait the minute for it to set, yes."

TRAVIS: A minute for it to set.

TALIESIN: Is there any way that-- to--

MATT: "There is. There are some other magical solvents, like a universal solvent could perhaps remove it, or an oil of etherealness to lose the physicality of one such object, and there's always a wish."

TALIESIN: That's too mean, never mind.

SAM: How much is that?

TRAVIS: It takes a minute to set.

LAURA: But any strength and it won't be able to pull it apart?

MATT: "Impossible outside of those scenarios."

SAM: How much?

LAURA: How much?

MATT: "It's only two ounces, so it's two uses, but it'll run you, for the entire jar, 600 gold.

SAM: I'll go halfsies with you.

LAURA: All my money's going to be gone, but--

SAM: I'll just pay for the whole thing myself.

LAURA: That's really good. I can put in 200 for it.

SAM: I'll put down four.

TRAVIS: Do it. Pour it between your butt cheeks and never poop again.

(laughter)

SAM: Oh, get those fingers away from me!

(laughter)

LAURA: You want to keep it?

SAM: Sure.

LAURA: Okay.

SAM: Don't know what we'll use it for, but it'll be fun.

LAURA: It's going to be amazing.

MARISHA: It'll present itself. It'll be great.

MATT: "You have cleared me of my current magical implements, but I do have many other trinkets and fun things. You in particular were interested in some of my other personal creations?"

TALIESIN: Oh, this is-- I'm very excited to learn how to play this. This is going to be great.

ASHLEY: Do you have-- you like making musical instruments, yes?

MATT: "Oh, well that is one thing I pass my time with, yes."

ASHLEY: Do you have a... Do you have a harp? (Marisha laughing)

MATT: "I can make one."

ASHLEY: What can you make it out of?

MATT: She looks over across the table at all the intricately carved bones that she has laid out and goes, "Out of with that." She points to-- there's a large oxen skull with a big set of curved horns that loop around the back of it, and she points to one of the large horns coming out of the side of the skull.

ASHLEY: That's actually exactly what I was hoping you could make it out of.

SAM: A skull harp?

MATT: "It may take a couple days, but I can do it."

ASHLEY: Well, I guess you're making-- you're coming back for the bowl, or?

LAURA: Oh, well, yeah.

ASHLEY: But we're probably going--

TALIESIN: I would say put the order in, because there's some back and forth and we should take a couple days to--

MATT: "A commission for a creation like that would run about, friends price, of course, as friends of Ludinus, I'd say... 100 gold pieces."

LAURA: But if we're buying the gem-crusted bowl, though.

ASHLEY: What if I were to give--

MATT: Make a persuasion check. (chuckling)

LIAM: She lives.

(Matt and Taliesin laughing)

TALIESIN: Oh wow.

LAURA: No, she doesn't.

MATT: Natural one?

LAURA: Yep. That's, like, all I'm rolling lately.

MATT: I know, I'm so sorry.

LAURA: Like, what is happening with my dice, y'all?

TRAVIS: Maybe you just need to go down to one set. Go back to basics.

LAURA: I'm trying to limit it.

TRAVIS: No, you're not.

LAURA: Okay, okay, tell you what--

TRAVIS: You've got whole generations of the families of dice over there, for fuck's sake.

LAURA: Should I keep this one here, or should I just switch--

TRAVIS: There's gerrymandering going on in your portion of the table.

TALIESIN: I'm going to take you to the oldest church in Los Angeles.

LAURA: Tonight is a full moon. Maybe after the game--

ASHLEY: You need to bathe them in the--

LAURA: I will perform a ritual.

TRAVIS: The house of representatives building under the desk.

ASHLEY: What do you charge for adding runes or anything like that?

MATT: "Oh, that's part of the process."

ASHLEY: That's part of the process.

MATT: "I don't make creations without adorning them with art."

ASHLEY: Do you know what I'm going to do, then? I'm going to give you a little bit extra. I'm going to give you 125 gold, and if there's anything very special that you want to add to it, I'd be fine with that. Any flair that you think of.

MATT: She takes a very long look over you entirely, between your armor, the outfit you're wearing, the force of personality you hold and the imposing figure that you are, and looks back over to the table. "I think I can improvise."

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: She accepts the gold. "And you would like to commission this bowl as well?"

LAURA: Uh-huh. Anybody want to help me, it would help all of us for sure.

TALIESIN: I'll throw in a little bit for this.

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

TALIESIN: This is my favorite person I've met in the city so far.

MARISHA: We're just bowl enthusiasts.

MATT: "Thank you!"

TALIESIN: Thank you.

ASHLEY: Oh shit.

LAURA: You don't have to help, because--

TALIESIN: How much do you need?

MARISHA: Oh, is this like an upfront thing? Or like pay when--

MATT: "I will take half of the payment now and half upon retrieval, just to ensure that you're not pulling my leg. Though you have proven yourselves fair patrons."

LAURA: I'll give her 50 platinum right now.

MARISHA: I'll give her, oh, that's half.

MATT: "All right."

TALIESIN: So we'll cover the other half when it's done.

MARISHA: I'll get the other half.

LIAM: Hi cow man, thanks, you're my favorite customer.

(laughter)

ASHLEY: Hi doggie.

MATT: "Two days, two days, I should have all of this ready for you."

LAURA: Okay.

SAM: Thank you.

MATT: "Thank you."

TRAVIS: Just going to have orders waiting in all these cities. (laughter) Got a harp here, got some bracers over here.

ASHLEY: I'm just going to keep spending money and never pick up my items.

(laughter)

TALIESIN: Standing orders across the globe.

MATT: Still waiting for you in Rosohna to pick up.

MARISHA: It's a cross-campaign pro.

(laughs)

MATT: It's been about 10 weeks, which is how long the commission was going to take.

ASHLEY: For the?

MATT: For the bracers.

ASHLEY: Oh, I thought you were talking about the stealthy-- I was like, "I think it's been a little bit more time."

MATT: Oh, the stealth armor? It's almost ready. Pike'll pick that up eventually.

(laughter)

TALIESIN: Show up, he's like, "I haven't even started."

(laughter)

MATT: "Is that all you need from me?"

SAM: I think so.

TALIESIN: For the moment, yeah. We'll be back.

MATT: "Thank you for coming to my collection. I look forward to seeing you in a few days. Good luck."

(laughter)

MARISHA: Bye.

TRAVIS: She did that, but her arms reached around, touched her ear.

MATT: Well, a hand was out here.

TRAVIS: Oh, right.

MATT: All right. And you guys exit back into the alleyway.

MARISHA: Were we supposed to be-- jade, jade, jade?

SAM and LAURA: What about jade?

MARISHA: Are we supposed to be looking for jade?

LAURA: For what?

SAM: What's jade? Whose jade?

MARISHA: Right?

LAURA: Why would we need jade?

MARISHA: Keep going, keep going. Let me remember something.

LAURA: (gasps) Just one, one.

MARISHA: Someone wanted us to find something.

TALIESIN: I'm here to provide.

SAM: All right, if we're going to stick around Rexxentrum for two days. (dice rattling) What do we need to accomplish?

TALIESIN: We could go check the archive site.

LAURA: Or we could go to that place if it's-- oh no, it's far away, isn't it?

LIAM: What place?

LAURA: The Pride's Call.

SAM: Pride Rock?

LAURA: Mm-hmm.

TRAVIS: It is a ways away.

LAURA: Oh, this is a minty one. No, it's not.

MATT: From Rexxentrum, Pride's Call is roughly 200 miles away.

MARISHA: Mm-hmm.

SAM: If only we could get there faster.

TALIESIN: I still having that conversation underneath magical duress is not the craziest idea. All the cards on, some cards on the table.

SAM: I just don't know why he would agree to that. We know that he's concealing stuff from us already.

TALIESIN: We just don't know what he's concealing.

SAM: I know, so why would he ever agree to that?

TALIESIN: We would also be under it.

TRAVIS: Right, but it does convey a certain sense of understood distrust, and I don't know if that's entirely what we want to do in this position.

SAM: Why don't we go back to him and say, "We don't believe you."

TRAVIS: Thank you for yesterday. Thank you for taking us to your asylum. We don't trust you for shit.

TALIESIN: Well, if they had been a little bit more honest, maybe we would've.

LAURA: Yeah, but they don't know we know that they were not.

TALIESIN: I think they know.

LAURA: Do they?

TALIESIN: I don't know, that's why I want to ask!

(laughter)

LIAM: We are very certain they are using us. It is obvious. I agree with Fjord, I'm not sure what going back to these people who are trying to use us, and asking them how they're using us, is going to help.

TALIESIN: I have a unquenchable hope that we can find one ally in this mess.

TRAVIS: That's fair.

TALIESIN: And I don't know any other way to do it.

TRAVIS: Sure, we have time to kill. We could certainly ask in the morning, before we had out to Pride's Call.

SAM: Wasn't there another mission that we were also--

MARISHA: That's what I'm trying to remember. And there was something--

MATT: You were offered a job from Pumat.

SAM: Oh, that's right.

MARISHA: What did he want us to find?

MATT: He wanted you to find--

MARISHA: Oh, basilisk oil.

TRAVIS: Oh, we should've asked Crazy Creepy Fingers if she needed anything.

MARISHA: Basilisk.

LAURA: Go back in and ask her!

TRAVIS: I walk back in and knock on the--

LAURA: Tell her where we're going.

TRAVIS: Hello? Keona?

MARISHA: I knew there was something.

MATT: "Back so soon?"

TRAVIS: Yes, so sorry. You said you had been wiped clean. I know the war effort is placing a high demand on your stores. Is there anything that you need procured or found or sussed out? We happen to be very handy.

MATT: "Hmm. Are you heading anywhere in particular?"

TRAVIS: We might be heading in a southwestern direction. Southwestern, southwestern.

MATT: "That's extremely vague and not helpful."

TRAVIS: Yes, towards Pride's Call. Out of Rexxentrum.

MATT: "Could you procure me some Pride silk?"

TRAVIS: Pride silk, I love Pride silk. What is it?

LAURA: (laughs) "What is it?"

MATT: "You see, due to the nature of the strange geothermal nature of the mountain range that protrudes on that side of the Valley, some of the plant life and creatures within are a bit different. The silkworms that have come to grow around Pride's Call produce a very strong silk, specific to the region. It's one of their greatest exports."

TRAVIS: Huh. Would you be needing the silkworms, or would you need us to extract their silk?

MATT: "Whichever is easiest for you."

TRAVIS: I think probably just the worms. I never milked a silkworm before.

ASHLEY: That's actually kind of fun.

MARISHA: (laughs)

TALIESIN: That won't work.

MATT: "Mind you, it's a very, very controlled process. It is very important to Pride's Call. This would not be an easy task."

TRAVIS: How much would you need?

MATT: "I mean, if you can procure a worm for me, I'll take three."

TRAVIS: Three worms?

MATT: "500 gold a worm."

MARISHA: Whoa! Let's get some worms!

TRAVIS: Sure. We will do our best.

MATT: "All right."

TRAVIS: Anything else?

MATT: "No."

TRAVIS: How long have you been in Rexxentrum?

MATT: "Me?"

TRAVIS: Yes.

MATT: "Oh, maybe 40 years."

TRAVIS: Family business, is it?

MATT: "No, just my own. I'm what you would call the odd duck in the family."

TRAVIS: Can't imagine why.

TALIESIN: Just for fun, I'm going to let Eyes of the Grave roll for a second in this room, just to give a little peek around.

MATT: (laughs) Nothing registers.

TALIESIN: I'm relieved and disappointed at the same time.

MATT: (laughs)

TRAVIS: Well, I hope when we see you next, we come bearing gifts.

MATT: "I hope so, too."

TRAVIS: Toodle-oo! It is just as creepy the second time.

MATT: (laughs)

ASHLEY: She reminds me of home.

TRAVIS: She what?

ASHLEY: Yeah, yeah, right?

TALIESIN: That's weird.

TRAVIS: What do you mean? In what way?

SAM: What home? What?

ASHLEY: I don't know.

TALIESIN: She's so crafty.

ASHLEY: She seemed crafty.

TALIESIN: I'm always impressed by someone who's like, scrapbooking.

LAURA: Did you know somebody with long fingers?

ASHLEY: No, just like how she is, and making things, and arts and crafts with bones. You know?

TALIESIN: You can do a lot.

ASHLEY: It's cool.

LAURA: I wonder if she's from Xhorhas.

ASHLEY: Maybe I'll ask her when we come back.

TRAVIS: If we can acquire three silkworms from near Pride's Call, she'll give us 500 gold per worm.

LAURA: Oh, they must be really hard to kill, then.

MATT: History check for both of you guys.

TALIESIN: Or they're the size of horses.

LAURA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

LAURA: No, yeah.

ASHLEY: I was going to say, they're probably huge.

TRAVIS: Like a bus.

LIAM: Natural 20 for a total of 30.

TRAVIS: (drawn out) Ooh! Tell me everything.

MARISHA: 26.

TALIESIN: Nothing like the shopping episode to run natural 20s right there. Burn them all now.

MATT: Pride's silk is the most prominent, expensive, and controlled export of Pride's Call. Only a handful of families procure it, and they guard those silkworms, which, by the way, are about the size of a fist, like they are the goose that laid the golden egg, because in a lot of ways, they are, and a lot of people outside that try and take them disappear.

LIAM: So a few families from that region got it on lock.

MATT: Yeah.

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: And the theft of taking these is very much against the law. They are legally owned by these families, and there's agreed upon, part of the whole Pride's Call coming into the Empire was an agreement that they would also give a certain amount of this silk to the Empire for its own uses, taking a tithe of what they're creating, but it is very much, you know, like, the banner of the town. So if there is an intent to take them, it's not going to be easy. And definitely not legal.

TALIESIN: This is stealing horses.

MATT: Yeah.

TALIESIN: This is like horse theft, okay.

TRAVIS: Is it the law, or is it more of a suggestion?

MATT: Very much the law.

TRAVIS: Meh!

LAURA: (laughs)

TALIESIN: All right, horse wrangling.

SAM: I'm not sure why we would need to go to Pride's Call. I mean, what are we trying to find there?

TRAVIS: Well, they said that there was an archeological dig.

MARISHA: That's where they found the beacon.

SAM: That's fake.

TRAVIS: Potentially.

MARISHA: I mean, we don't know.

TALIESIN: Seems like an awful lot of work to prove that we already know that they're lying.

SAM: I want to find your friend Astrid.

MARISHA: Why?

SAM: Weren't you curious about her?

LIAM: Maybe.

LAURA: She did say to meet her.

SAM: She gave us her address. We could at least swing by and see if she's home.

MARISHA: I mean, that also feels like a trap though, right?

SAM: No, she doesn't know who we are.

LAURA: Now Trent already knows we're here, it's not like he's going to like, suddenly surprise us when we get to her house or something.

TRAVIS: That's true.

LAURA: Do you want to see her?

LIAM: I don't want to go over there a big group of us.

SAM: Well, just a couple, then? Just to spy a little bit?

TRAVIS: Just stay outside, if you wanted to check in.

LAURA: Just to make sure you're safe.

SAM: You and I could turn invisible.

LIAM: No.

SAM: Just look through the window.

LIAM: I would rather not.

LAURA: Okay.

SAM: You want to send me?

LIAM: No, I don't want to poke that nest.

TRAVIS: All right. Well, if we're not going to Pride's Call, and we need to kill a few days. Should we enter a fighting tournament? (laughter)

MATT: Yes! (laughter) Fuck yes.

TRAVIS: Does such a thing exist in this town?

MATT: I can make one.

TRAVIS: Because I feel like, suddenly overnight, I feel a bit more me. I don't know, and perhaps we need to just, you know, mix it up. Punch me. Oh, fuck, no, ah!

MATT: (laughs)

MARISHA: I will take any opportunity, any. I don't know why.

TALIESIN: A couple days to maybe burn some spells, prepare, see what I can--

MATT: You guys can take downtime. You don't have to like--

TALIESIN: Couple days of just downtime might just be a good thing to do.

TRAVIS: I want a fighting tournament.

LAURA: (laughs)

MATT: There isn't a public one here.

TRAVIS: Fuck.

MATT: If you wanted to take some downtime to inquire about like any underground fight rings, you can definitely take that as part of your downtime activity.

MARISHA: Fight club!

ASHLEY: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MARISHA: I'm into that.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: I don't know, okay, totally into fight club, but also if we're taking a few days, whether we know they're lying out their fucking asses or not, right, it still seems like we should try to find more information, right? Like something?

SAM: Yeah!

MARISHA: I don't know how or what or why.

TRAVIS: You could check in on the temple and see how the investigation is going?

MARISHA: I could check back in. I haven't really spent any amount of real time with the Cobalt Soul here in Rexxentrum, so I could check in with them.

LAURA: Mm-hmm.

MARISHA: The Soul is supposed to act as a checks and balance system between the Cerberus Assembly. They're supposed to make sure that all of the information that they're holding doesn't belong as public knowledge. But...

TRAVIS: What do you mean? They don't want what the Cerberus Assembly knows to be public knowledge?

MARISHA: No, they, you know, the Cobalt Soul, they believe in keeping knowledge and having like a public access to knowledge, and often that the hoarding of knowledge can be deemed as dangerous. So, right?

MATT: Mm-hmm.

TRAVIS: Do you know if the Cobalt Soul has ever interfered at a high level with the Cerberus Assembly?

MARISHA: Do I know if the (mumbling)? I feel like--

MATT: Roll a history check.

MARISHA: Dairon has mentioned something like this to me.

MATT: Dairon has, just roll a history check.

SAM: Also, just a side note. If we're honestly just wasting two days, why don't we just go to the Bright Queen now, and then come back in two days?

MARISHA: Natural 20.

TALIESIN: We may not be able to come back in two days.

SAM: Why not? We can teleport whenever we want.

TALIESIN: Because things may happen there.

MARISHA: I'm assuming that, right. The little moon? The moon is a symbol?

MATT: Often. The Cobalt Soul and the Cerberus Assembly have worked in an antagonistic lockstep for the better part of a century, or really since the inception of the Cerberus Assembly. They do not outwardly show aggression towards each other, but it's very much a political chess game, and as such, very much have maintained a checks and balances in each point. They have done, on both sides, what they can to curb the influence the other has when it's inconvenient, and prevented one or the other from achieving internal goals that went against the needs and wants of their own faction. They do work together out of necessity, publicly, and behind the scenes. It's very much a relationship of frustrated convenience at times, and other times very much a subversive antagonism.

MARISHA: I relay all of that.

TRAVIS: Some complicated shit.

MARISHA: Yeah, I mean, the thing that first started getting me on board with the Cobalt Soul was when they were like, "Yeah, we root out corruption in places like the government and Cerberus Assembly," and then I was like, "Whoa, but aren't you, like, an organization, and aren't all organizations prone to, like, corruption?" And they were like--

MATT: You rolled a natural 20, correct?

MARISHA: Yes.

MATT: You do know, a recent historical event in which the Cobalt Soul was responsible for rooting out illegal, magical experimentations that a member of the Cerberus Assembly was accomplishing about 25, 26 years ago, by the name of Dr. Anna Ripley, who was then ousted from the Assembly and escaped punishment.

SAM: Ooh.

TRAVIS: I'm sorry. Okay.

LAURA: Anna Ripley was in the Assembly?

SAM: Whoa.

MATT: My apologies. Delilah Briarwood.

LAURA: (gasps)

SAM: Oh.

LAURA: Delilah Briarwood!

TRAVIS and MARISHA: Was in the Assembly?

LIAM: Yeah, that's been mentioned at this table before.

MATT: Yeah. Working on the animated series right now. My brain crossed paths on that one. Delilah Briarwood was a member of the Assembly. And it was the Cobalt Soul that uncovered her necromantic experimentation.

MARISHA: Right. Yeah, this like weird fucking vampirey woman, I don't know.

TRAVIS: Cool.

MARISHA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: All right. You were saying about a two day wait?

SAM: No, I'm fine to just wait two days, but if we're not going to do anything, why don't we just go to talk to the Bright Queen now, and come back?

LIAM: Well, I'll tell you why. Because we need to be here for two days so that I can split off on my own and go to, without telling any of you, 31st Wodestone Manor.

SAM: Got it.

TALIESIN: I also want to cast Commune every day for-- I have a few questions, so.

MATT: Okay. Well, hold onto those thoughts.

LAURA: Oh.

MATT: Because it is 11:00.

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: And we'll take a week to gather your thoughts on the things you want to achieve when we come back next Thursday.

MARISHA: Fuck!

TRAVIS: Please train me to be a badass fighter in underground basement clubs.

MATT: Sorry about the mix-up there about the Ripley-Delilah thing.

MARISHA: No, no, no, that's fine. That's awesome.

MATT: But, go ahead and make notes there. We'll pick up next week, and see how you guys spend your preparation downtime, or however you'd want to spend it, next Thursday, before we head off to the holidays. (chuckles) Well, Anna Ripley was part of, did work with the government. Which is where my confusion came from. She worked with the Dwendalian Empire and was ousted for illegal experimentation.

SAM: Whoa.

MATT: They met in Port Damali after both escaping their own, like, at separate times--

TRAVIS: Delilah and Anna Ripley did?

MATT: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Anna had her own knock off list, too.

MATT: Yep.

LAURA: Oh, that's right.

MATT: King Dwendal was on her list.

LAURA: That's right, that's right, I remember that.

TRAVIS: 11:00 things.

MATT: Mm-hmm. So yeah, so, yeah. That's how they met in Port Damali and aligned themselves, they were like, "Fuck the Empire, fuck these people, we got skills, let's work together."

TALIESIN: Suddenly, I like the Empire a little bit more, but only a little. (laughter) Only a little.

MATT: Well, cool. Thank you guys so much, good game. We'll pick up from there next week. Thank you guys for coming along with us on this leg of the adventure. We'll see you next week. Don't forget, we love you very much, and is it Thursday yet? Good night.

(cheering) (dramatic music)