Transcript:The Journey Home

List of Transcripts

Pre-Show
MATT: Hello everyone, and welcome to tonight's episode of Critical Role, where a bunch of us nerdy-ass voice actors sit around and play Dungeons & Dragons.

TRAVIS: Yeah we do!

MATT: If you recognize from those voices, we have returning finally, after the first foray into parenthood, Travis and Laura! Welcome back!

TRAVIS: You guys are a sight for sore eyes! Hi, Matt.

MATT: We have missed you so much.

LIAM: I am so happy!

MATT: How's the kid?

LAURA: No, he's great.

TRAVIS: Yeah, no. He's just a love and (snoring).

LAURA: He's here in the studio right now, so you might hear crying. If I get up from the table, it's because I'm going to go feed him.

MATT: Aw. That's true.

TRAVIS: He dictates all.

LAURA: We are at his whim.

MATT: Welcome back.

TRAVIS and LAURA: Thank you!

MATT: We're happy to have you. We missed you at the live show.

TRAVIS: I know.

LAURA: We were with you there in spirit.

MATT: I know, we felt it.

TRAVIS: Loved the birthday song, it was such great energy. You guys did so good.

MATT: The audience was fantastic.

LAURA: You guys looked wonderful. You especially, Samuel.

SAM: Thank you.

MATT: Let's go ahead and get into our announcements so we can kick into the game today. Tonight, we have two fantastic sponsors. Our first, our wonderful returning sponsor for Campaign Two, our friends and D&D Beyond. Sam.

SAM: D&D Beyond! Thanks to D&D Beyond for sponsoring and helping out with the live show. Your sponsorship dollars will help our cast pay for the therapy they need after seeing my junk so close and personal. It's been a while since Travis and Laura were here, and this is their first show at the new studio. So D&D Beyond wanted me to bring them up to speed, to catch them up with things, with all things CR. Here is your update, you might want to take notes: Laura, the new WiFi password is "DallasSux" with an "x." Travis, we rented out your parking spot to Brian Foster. The cardboard box he lives in will be parked there until September 15th.

LAURA: I thought he was in the cage!

SAM: The Wayfarer's Guide to Eberron, The Guildmaster's Guide to Ravnica are both available on D&D Beyond.

TRAVIS: Oh good! I'm writing this down.

SAM: Travis, while you were gone, we discovered Fjord's middle name is Bronco, so that's canon now. Laura, while you were gone, your dice were all loaned to Wil Wheaton for a little while.

LAURA: Oh no.

SAM: The break room is open to all, but from 9:00 to 11:00 in the morning, Max uses it to poop. We have a code system for reserving the makeup room, so no one walks in. If you're breastfeeding, hang a sock on the door. If you're waxing Sam Riegel's chest hair, you hang a bandana on the door, and if you're having sex, leave the door open because that's kinky. Travis, we reinforced your chair to accommodate your baby weight.

TRAVIS: It's real! Guys can get it, too!

SAM: Laura, you are a perfect creature who creates magical life with the power of womanhood. Taliesin's new character is a cleric, so you don't have to heal anyone.

LAURA: Fuck yes!

SAM: Liam shaved. It's Ashley's birthday. Marisha no longer thinks sleeves are bullshit, now she thinks they're assholes. All firblogs--bolgs know each other. If you go number one, please use the bathroom marked "Peeastock." If you go number two, use the one marked "Hupperdook." And there are flies motherfucking everywhere in the studio. And that's it.

MATT: Thank you, Sam. Thank you, D&D Beyond.

SAM: To D&D Beyond, for sponsoring that inane list.

MATT: We appreciate that.

LIAM: I had a fur blog in the early 2000s.

TALIESIN: Updated it every day, didn't you?

MATT: Our second sponsor tonight, our fantastic friends at Dwarven Forge. You may have seen some of their products used pretty consistently on this show since I've had access to them. I've hungered after their work since I was a mid-20s-er, whatever you'd call that. Yeah. Thanks to their Kickstarters and their update from dwarvenite to resin, I was able to find them more affordable, and I love using it. They're big time critters as well. They've been invested in the show, and they're also general leaders in hand sculpted and painted terrain sets. I love them, and they launched another Kickstarter recently for their Caverns Deep! set, which is awesome. It offers 15 different distinct encounter areas, like, as it says here, the Webbed Lair, the Mushroom Grotto, and a brand new forest terrain system called the Dreadhollow Forest, which me and Liam got unveil at Gen Con in a live game, that looks so fucking cool!

LIAM: I know! I backed that shit!

MATT: So did I. We're there, you should back it too! They also put out a video, I think yesterday, the day before, that unveils one of their passages, I think it's the prison passage, where you get to watch me, as a little mini, get imprisoned, brutalized, and then murdered! It's fun!

LIAM: I didn't realize when we were trying to save your voice box in the game at Gen Con, that that was part of a running inside joke.

MATT: They asked if I'd help out with that, and I'm like, fuck yeah. You can become a backer now, if you're interested, at critrole.com/dwarvenforge for all the information about the current Kickstarter. It ends August 14th, so it's ending really soon. If you want to get in there, with all the amazing stretch goals, go check it out, and be the first to check out the exclusive Kickstarter at the price point that only the Kickstarter enables. Honey Heist 2: Electric Beargaloo--

MARISHA: Oh my god!

MATT: --will air tomorrow at 7:00pm Pacific Time here at twitch.tv/criticalrole. Critical Role. Also, if you haven't seen yet, my fireside chat that we had on Tuesday, it's available on YouTube.com/criticalrole, where I drink a lot of really nice ports and talk questions and fun stuff. So it was a good hangout time. Hope to do those more in the future as well. I actually really enjoyed just sitting there and getting mildly tipsy with the Internet. It's fun. What the hell was that?

SAM: It was the magnets.

MATT: Oh god.

TRAVIS: Quit putting your sex toys on the desk, man. Keep them underneath.

LAURA: Did my hit points already get updated on my thingie?

MATT: Yeah.

TRAVIS: That's the DM at work.

MATT: That's what happens when people aren't updating it fast enough and we need to update the sheets here, so I do it for you.

LAURA: Sorry, Matthew.

SAM: Just blame the baby.

LAURA: I do.

MATT: That's okay.

LIAM: Can we get a show of hands for everyone who got max HP this level-up?

MATT: Yeah, it's fucking bullshit.

LIAM: Fuck you, and you, and fuck you, and especially fuck you.

LAURA: I got three last time, though.

TRAVIS: Yeah, we got new baby magic, man. I'll take it where I can get it.

MATT: She did roll pretty poorly last time. Ashley got an 11. Yeah.

MARISHA: Yasha!

MATT: Yeah, so whenever we get her back, she's going to be a little beefier. Last but not least, we have a bunch of new items in the shop. We have our retro tees back, we have the new Critter cap is in stock.

LAURA: Hey, wait! That's my job!

MATT: I thought you said you didn't have anything to update.

LAURA: No, I said I didn't have anything to hold up!

MATT: Then here, go for it!

LAURA: We have new shirts! We have new hats!

MARISHA: She's been gone so long, don't take her job!

LAURA: I don't know which camera to look at because it's a little different than before.

SAM: That one right there.

LAURA: This one?

SAM: Yeah.

LAURA: There's a bumper sticker that says, "The Traveler is My Co-Pilot."

TRAVIS: Beautiful. Keep going, yeah. Do it for your son.

LAURA: There's-- we have The Mighty Nein shirt. I don't know what else is there anymore.

LIAM: Jeez, get off my back, Mom!

MARISHA: The shirt, yeah, good.

SAM: The bumper sticker.

LAURA: We have the bumper sticker, we have the hats, we have the t-shirts, and we have a pin, which is going to come back in the store. It's not in the store just at this moment, but it will be back.

MATT: It will be back, yeah.

LAURA: And there's other things coming in the store soon, too.

TRAVIS: Nice job, babe. A-one. Top shelf.

MATT: As a reminder, we have our Wyrmwood giveaways at the break. We'll have information on that when we get to it, but you'll have to move over to the twitch.tv/criticalrole chat to jump into it and be a part of it. But we'll talk of that when we get to it. With that, our announcements for the evening are done.

TRAVIS: I have a question.

MATT: Yes?

TRAVIS: Where do I add the +2 to strength for the dad strength I have now?

(laughter)

TRAVIS: Okay, that's it. I'm already a dad. That's all I had to say!

MATT: Your timing is impeccable. With that, let's go ahead and dive into tonight's episode of Critical Role.

[click, TV static] [groovy Critical Role theme]

Part I
MATT: And welcome back, everybody. That was a unique rush. Last we left off-- we're going to do a little bit of time bending here, so we can make sure we get everything we want to. Last we left off, The Mighty Nein, upon heading towards the second leg of their journey, completing a task for The Gentleman, of who they had left Zadash to earn money and praise with, found themselves in the outskirts of Hupperdook, where three members of their team were captured in the middle of the night by a group of traveling slavers.

LAURA: Which members?

TRAVIS: Pay attention!

MARISHA: Oh no, Jester has amnesia, you guys.

MATT: Oh, the amnesia arc. You've got to have one at every point in the party. We lost one, we gain one. I know. These three members-- Yasha, Jester, and Fjord-- all captured by the Iron Shepherds, this group of slavers, and dragged north to Shadycreek Run, outside of the laws of the Empire. The rest of the members, finding new allies in Keg, the dwarven fighter; Nila, the firbolg druid; and a brief reappearance of the fantastic human cleric, Shakäste. These friends together managed to storm the gifted stronghold of The Sour Nest, attack and destroy, one by one, this team of slavers, leaving The Iron Shepherds down to their last few in the subterranean basement where these cages contained their friends, chained and held in darkness. There, the battle with Lorenzo, revealing his final form after stalking them invisibly from the air for their entire journey through that fortress, revealed himself to be an oni, a terrible creature of nightmare and entirely unnatural strength and capability. However, through some ingenuity, fast thinking, and some incredible luck, Lorenzo found himself unable to escape. The members of your team, knocked unconscious, brought back from the brink, and a final blow was dealt by Caleb, as his arcane cinders burned away the final remnants of Lorenzo's demonic form. There, as you began to inspect the interior of the subterranean chamber, you discovered in one set of these prison cells to the left, there lie chained Jester and Fjord. In the other, an unconscious Yasha. With that, you made your way through the bars, unlocking the mechanisms that held them at bay, and have now come back face to face with your taken friends, with one new friend, and one missing. And that's where we come in. Jester, you and Fjord both, in the chamber after enduring the sounds of other captors being punished, being tortured, and a nearby friend enduring it silently just to frustrate them. You've been trying desperately to contemplate ways of escape, to try and find a way to relieve yourself of your bindings to no avail. Then suddenly, there's the sound of battle, weapons scraping on stone and metal and flesh, screams, familiar voices, flashes of light, the air rushing warm and cold with the nearby blasting of arcane energies, divine forces and powers brought in to sustain and snuff life, and then silence. You hear the voices come close, and as you barely manage to move over and glance over your shoulder, you watch as the bars swing open to the chamber where you're held, and the tiny form of Nott the Brave rushes over and embraces you, saying:

SAM: Case closed.

LAURA: (muffled speech)

SAM: Oh, yes, okay! I'll take whatever is on her mouth off.

MATT: You pull off what is essentially a thick leather gag that has been keeping her from speaking.

LAURA: (gasps) Oh!

SAM: Hello.

LAURA: How did you guys find us?

SAM: Well, we followed the clues, we traced the evidence, we thought about it logically, and also this girl who was walking down the street told us where to go.

LAURA: Really?

SAM: Yeah!

LAURA: I didn't even get to tell anyone! I tried to. I tried to cast Sending, but my hands are bound.

SAM: Oh, let me untie you. I'll cut out-- cut off her hands.

MATT: They're bound by chained manacles, but we'll say, given the fact that there is no immediate pressure of time, you take your time with the bindings, using your lock picks, and manage to free her of the manacles.

LAURA: Thank you. Fjord is also tied up, though, really bad.

SAM: How are you doing? Oh, sorry.

LAURA: Oh, my muscles would be really sore. This is really hard for me. Somebody else should help him out.

SAM: Are you sure he's not just--?

LAURA: Seriously, though, this is really painful, somebody should help him.

SAM: Okay, we'll help him out.

LAURA: Do you know how bad it is to have your hands tied behind your back for several days?

SAM: I don't, no.

LAURA: It's not fun.

SAM: Oh no! Fjord, are you all right? Are you injured? Did they cut off your thumbs?

TRAVIS: No, we got our thumbs. Where is-- Where is Yasha?

SAM: Oh, I don't know. Do you guys see Yasha?

TRAVIS: They took her out of here. They were--

LAURA: They knocked her unconscious.

SAM: Hey! Beau, do you see Yasha out there?

MARISHA: I look in the other chamber. Is she in there?

MATT: As you guys had noticed, at this point you've glanced over in the other chamber and you do see, faced away and lying within the other chamber, is Yasha. You manage to eventually get it open, and inside, she is lying there, motionless.

MARISHA: Can I check her to see if she's still breathing?

MATT: Mm-hmm. It's really relatively easy to check: she's breathing. She looks pretty brutalized. There are gashes and tear marks in the flesh where hooks were pulled through, there are streaks of dried blood on her. But she's not unconscious within an inch of her life. She's a hardy woman, and she's endured a lot and then some, and she lies here unconscious before you, still bound in manacles.

LIAM: Seeing Beau go in ahead of me, still sitting on the table, I mutter a word and cast Knock and the manacles fall away.

MARISHA: Deuces.

TALIESIN: Hmm?

MARISHA: Have any healing left?

TALIESIN: Not a drop.

LAURA: You have-- I have healing, though. Don't worry, I have healing. Who are you? I have healing.

MARISHA: Are you okay?

LAURA: Yes. I mean, I can heal. I haven't been using any spells-- I can't use anything when your hands are tied.

MARISHA: I just give Jester a big hug.

LAURA: Thank you, Beau. Thank you guys.

SAM: Well, let's-- let's move.

LAURA: I go cast Cure Wounds on Yasha.

MATT: The wounds seal up and she notably becomes healthier. Some scars still remain, but she's further from the brink. But still unconscious.

TRAVIS: Is the room clear? Did you take care of all of them?

SAM: Yes. Yes, I think so. We haven't scouted around every--

TRAVIS: There were so many.

SAM: We had some help.

TRAVIS: You did?

SAM: Shakäste's here.

LAURA: I saw Shakäste!

TRAVIS: Shakäste?

LAURA: No, we saw him in one of the-- I just couldn't tell you! I saw him in one of the other cages.

TRAVIS: I didn't see him.

MARISHA: There was also a really nice firbolg named Nila. Her son and her mate got scooped up.

LAURA: Is that like Pumat Sol?

MARISHA: Yeah. It's like him, too.

TALIESIN: Hi.

MARISHA: This is Caduceus, he also came with us to help out.

LAURA: Caduceus.

TALIESIN: Hello.

LAURA: Hi.

SAM: We met him this morning.

MARISHA: We've had an interesting 24 hours.

TALIESIN: I'm here to help. I made a deal with this one. It's okay.

LAURA: I like your hair.

TALIESIN: Thank you. I like your hair, too.

LAURA: Thank you.

TRAVIS: Caduceus, I'm Fjord. Appreciate your help.

TALIESIN: You want to get up out of this thing?

TRAVIS: Yeah.

LAURA: Where's Molly?

TALIESIN: Who?

TRAVIS: Molly.

TALIESIN: Oh, your friend.

LIAM: Jester.

LAURA: Is he waiting upstairs?

MARISHA: He didn't make it.

LAURA: To this dungeon? Because he's waiting upstairs?

MARISHA: He didn't survive the trip. I'm really sorry.

LAURA: Was that when we heard you guys?

TRAVIS: The caravan.

LAURA: We were in the caravan, we heard you guys fighting.

MARISHA: Fuck!

LAURA: We heard people shouting, I heard you call for Molly.

SAM: Yeah.

TRAVIS: We couldn't see you. We could barely see anything. We were stuck, they had us gagged and bound. I swore I heard a few voices, but we were moving before we knew it.

LAURA: We tried shouting. There's just no way you could hear us.

LIAM: No, we are sorry. We tried our best, but it wasn't good enough.

SAM: He tried his best. He got right up in Lorenzo's face, and he just wasn't strong enough.

MARISHA: We got cocky and underestimated our enemies.

TRAVIS: It's not your fault.

LAURA: Where did you leave him?

MARISHA: He's buried in the wood. The Bramblewood. Right? No, that's not right. That's the old campaign.

MATT: You buried him along the Glory Run Road.

MARISHA: That's a fitting name. We can take you there.

LAURA: Okay.

MARISHA: It's on the way back to Zadash. We've got to talk to the Gentleman, anyway.

LAURA: Did you kill everyone here?

SAM: I think so.

LAURA: Lorenzo?

SAM: Yep.

LAURA: What about that short guy that was really mean?

SAM: Protto?

MARISHA: Fuck him. Protto.

LIAM: We should be sure.

TRAVIS: They were a nasty bunch. Lorenzo was not what he seemed.

MARISHA: No.

LIAM: We need to give the house the once-over. Make sure there is nobody left. We agreed to clear this house of everything.

TRAVIS: Fuck! I'm sorry. We should have seen them coming, heard them. We just weren't expecting it.

MARISHA: It's no one's fault.

TRAVIS: It doesn't feel that way.

MARISHA: No, it doesn't. I was lying.

TRAVIS: Yasha. Yasha doesn't know.

LAURA: She won't know for a while. It always takes them a while to wake up. That elven woman, she would cast something, she would do something to the manacles.

SAM: To make them impossible to--?

TRAVIS: They'd beat the fucking hell out of us, and then if there was anything left, one touch, and that was it. Darkness.

MARISHA: We overheard them saying that they were trying to break people mentally. Do you know what they were trying to use you guys for?

LAURA: They were going to sell us.

MARISHA: To who?

LAURA: Whoever would buy us.

TRAVIS: Whoever was paying. I think they were trying to work on our minds first. Sounds like Yasha got the physical part next. It was a long night. I preferred it to the beating, though.

SAM: We saw blood when we woke up. Was that yours or theirs?

TRAVIS: Probably ours.

MARISHA: Fuck, you guys. I am so sorry.

TRAVIS: I'm sorry. I don't even know what to say.

MARISHA: Well, piece of shit is dead, all his fucking cronies are dead.

LIAM: And we learn for the future: this won't happen again. You understand me?

TALIESIN: I mean, this is pretty good from a certain perspective. I mean, if you think about it. Bad things happen to people every day, and then you have a bunch of people who care about you so much that they come and save you, fix it, defeat a great evil. I mean, nothing this good ever happens. This is great. I'm going to go check upstairs. I think you guys have a lot to talk about. I'm going to head upstairs and start searching.

MATT: You turn around and there's Keg awkwardly standing in the back of the chamber, hearing all this. You can see the guilt in her eyes, and she goes, "I'm going to go join Caduceus." Pulls out a cigarette and lights it as she follows him up.

MARISHA: Caduceus is an interesting one.

LAURA: I liked his hair.

MARISHA: He's got great hair.

LAURA: I wish I had hair like that.

MARISHA: Yeah, me too.

TRAVIS: Pretty positive.

MARISHA: Whatever he says.

LAURA: You guys did come to save us, though. Thank you, really.

MARISHA: Molly laid down his life for you guys. He was the best of us.

SAM: We had no choice, I mean--

LAURA: You did! You did have a choice.

TRAVIS: Yeah, you did. You could have let us go. I wouldn't be telling you the truth if I didn't say I didn't consider it for a couple days.

MARISHA: I would have laid down my life for you guys.

LAURA: I would have tried to heal you back.

MARISHA: Thanks, Jester. Here. I pull out from the back of my--

LAURA: From your butt? What did you pull out of your butt?

MARISHA: It's Molly's sword.

LAURA: Oh shit.

SAM: Big butt.

(laughter)

TRAVIS: Beau got a big ol' butt.

MARISHA: I think it would suit both of you, but I feel like one of you should have it.

LAURA: I mean, you roomed with him the most.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

LAURA: But I like really cool things, so, I mean, I will take it if, you know. I was also tiefling, he's a tiefling, we were both really cool.

TRAVIS: What about his jacket?

MARISHA: We left it to mark his grave. It's probably stolen, but the thought was nice.

TRAVIS: People need killing if that happened, so, you know.

LAURA: If I ever see anyone wearing Molly's coat--

MARISHA: We're going to fucking slit their throats.

SAM: Unless it's him. He could come back from the dead or something. He's done it before.

TRAVIS: He's done it before? Oh, right. Lucien?

LAURA: Lucius.

TRAVIS: Lucien.

LAURA: Lucius. Lu-chel.

SAM: Nonagon?

LIAM: Kind of a moot point at this moment.

TRAVIS: You're right. I would be honored to have this sword. Caleb. Thank you.

LIAM: Oh. Group effort.

TRAVIS: Sure it was. Nott. Thanks.

SAM: It's an honor.

LAURA: Beau?

MARISHA: Hmm?

LAURA: Thank you.

MARISHA: Thank you, Jester.

TRAVIS: Maybe we can hold on to some of those gags.

LAURA: Me and Fjord spent a lot of time together in this cell.

TRAVIS: Okay. None of that happened. No.

LAURA: Lots of eye contact happening. Just between me and you.

SAM: I've heard stories about people in captivity sort of resorting to primal instincts.

LAURA: Yeah. I noticed him rolling over towards me several times, if you know what I mean.

SAM: I do know what you mean.

LAURA: He kept wiggling. You can't really move very much, you wiggle like a little--

SAM: Must have been cold at night. You had to snuggle for body heat.

LAURA: Like shoulder to shoulder, like this.

SAM: Ooh! That's all I need to know.

(laughter)

LAURA: But really, we should get Yasha out of here, because she's still unconscious. This is fucked up. Stop joking, you guys, this is serious.

SAM: Oh, oh, oh! Kiri's fine.

LAURA: Did you-- wait.

SAM: Kiri's okay, Kiri's fine. We found a new home.

LAURA: I know. I was there, I said goodbye to her.

SAM: Oh, you did.

(laughter)

LAURA: I understand how you would think, because I wasn't quite myself, but--

SAM: Oh, also, there's this town where there's these gnomes and they dance all night!

LAURA: What?!

SAM: Yeah, it's called Hupperdook. It's the funniest name.

LAURA: I love that name.

SAM: Before that-- I'd forgotten how long you were gone.

LIAM: Too long.

LAURA: Too long.

TRAVIS: You've done a marvelous job, and we can't thank you enough. Let us help you with whatever--

SAM: Insight check. Has he been turned? Is he different, is he weird?

MATT: Go ahead and make an insight check.

(laughter)

SAM: 15.

MARISHA: Oh, shit!

LAURA: Whispers!

LIAM: Laslo has jumped bodies.

SAM: Who are you, really?

(laughter)

MARISHA: Good times, you guys.

SAM: Let's get out of here.

TRAVIS: Yeah, please, get us the fuck out of here.

LAURA: Are there other prisoners in this area, too, or is it just us?

MATT: You guys were the first ones that were-- you were the prime candidates to be broken.

LAURA: We were extra special.

MARISHA: Hey, guys? Fuck human traffickers, am I right?

TRAVIS: Yeah.

LAURA: They're terrible.

LIAM: Let's go rob them blind.

MARISHA: Okay, let's do it.

LAURA: I bet they have so much stuff!

MARISHA: We rob them blind!

TRAVIS: Shouldn't we try and wake up Yasha?

SAM: We have two healers here. Three.

MARISHA: Well, we healed her, she's still just--

TRAVIS: She's just out because of the effect of the--

LIAM: I will hang out with her while you guys go check the house. Please bring me any books.

MARISHA: We get everyone out of the basement and we lay Yasha down upstairs some place comfortable.

LIAM: I will sit with her.

MATT: As you guys bring her up and you look for other people who were in the cages, you notice that they're all missing. Shakäste has ushered them out of the complex to get them to safety as he said he would.

MARISHA: Oh Shakäste, yay.

MATT: Caduceus and Keg are up there sharing a conversation, feeling like the proverbial outsiders.

TALIESIN: Yeah, I didn't actually search the house, I just ended up in the kitchen. I'm starting to cook food. It was a nice kitchen when we ran through it. I'm trying to see if I can put together some sort of omelette or something.

MARISHA: I love that so much.

MATT: I love it. Keg is going through the corpses of the different thugs and rolling them for change. She's got a cigarette hanging out of the mouth feeling through pockets. Who's helming the investigation of the stronghold?

MARISHA: I'll take one.

SAM: I will assist.

MATT: All right, so go ahead and roll twice and roll with advantage.

MARISHA: What was that thing where I could spend a ki point and do another roll on my insight check?

MATT: Well no, it gives you advantage to spend a ki point to do it.

MARISHA: It gives me-- oh. Which I already have. Okay, 16. Oh sorry. 15.

MATT: 15, all right. Over the next hour or so, you guys begin to tear through. If someone wants to take note of this, these are the things that you find--

LIAM: Short rest!

LAURA: Oh, this is me writing this stuff down now?

SAM: That's your job, isn't it?

LAURA: Well, somebody hijacked all my good pencils when I was gone.

SAM: Here's a pencil.

MATT: All right. Amongst the bodies and materials that have been set aside to equip those who exist within The Sour Nest, you get: six shortswords, two longswords, two crossbows, three shortbows, and eight sets of partially damaged leather armor. They're all used, they're not the highest quality. They're functional.

MARISHA: We can sell them.

MATT: Possibly, depending on where you take them. That's the low end. Because you got higher than a 12, you do find-- the bottom floor is a number of the-- the second basement floor, you find a plethora of torture implements. Plenty of brands and small blades and hooks. You find flaying knives. It's a terrible array. If you were to choose to take any, you could write down torture implements. Should you be so inclined. You do find on the bodies of the--

MARISHA: Shooting a Hostel sequel.

MATT: Yeah. On the bodies of everyone who-- all the bodies that still remain here, as the body of Lorenzo is destroyed other than the glaive, you find 131 gold pieces across all those bodies.

LAURA: That'll make up for what you stole from me!

MATT: In the storage chests that are in various bunkers in the top floor, you also find a potion that looks like a weird, syrupy, quicksilver type of a liquid on the inside of this little glass vial and you find this receipt.

MARISHA: (singing) Gimme gimme gimme!

SAM: It'll be good for our taxes.

MARISHA: Service and payments to the Iron Shepherds. House Jagentoths. Who's Jagentoths?

LIAM: We've heard that before.

MATT: Yeah, Keg has spoken. That's the opposing house to house Mardoon.

MARISHA: Oh, the house that sponsors The Iron Shepherds.

MATT: Yeah.

MARISHA: These are the receipts (gasp)-- these are the receipts of--!

SAM: Of people!

MARISHA: Yeah! Oh my god!

TRAVIS: Travel for hire, bribery--

MARISHA: Oh, this could take down the Jagentoths.

TRAVIS: Tools and materials, delivered goods polished.

MATT: Could take them down in a place that has law. But it may have some use, you don't know.

MARISHA: Blackmail!

MATT: You did get the baseline 15 DC, though, in going through the upstairs chamber that you found to be Lorenzo's chamber. Through the bed, you find 15 gold pieces scattered in some of the shelves near the bed unit, beneath where there's the platter containing the remains some young creature. Then beneath, tucked underneath the bed and up into the slats, you find a heavy leather bag of some kind. You pull it out, and what you find is--

MARISHA: Nothing's trapped, right?

MATT: You can check if you want to. Go ahead and make an investigation check.

SAM: Do you want me to check?

MARISHA: Are you with me?

SAM: I was assisting.

TRAVIS: That rogue shit.

SAM: Investigation? 22.

LAURA: You're not even drunk.

MATT: Not trapped, just well hidden. You do find this thick leather satchel. As you pull it back, it's well made. It has some stains on it, it looks like. Some more of a crimson history, some that look like general dirt wear and tear.

TRAVIS, MARISHA and MATT: Crimson.

MATT: The stitching is really well done, and the front of it looks like a face, the way it's designed.

MARISHA: Does it have an open drawstring? Can I look inside?

MATT: It has a little flap that opens up, yeah. You look inside and it looks like an empty bag.

LIAM: Blue ink (puffing).

MARISHA: Yeah!

TRAVIS: Maybe it's another haversack?

MARISHA: Does it seem magical to you?

SAM: Let me reach in.

MARISHA: Okay. See how far you hand goes.

SAM: I reach in and think of gold. See if I pull it out.

MATT: No gold.

SAM: Did it feel cold in there or anything?

MATT: The temperature felt consistent with the temperature of the room you're in.

LAURA: Did you reach the bottom?

TRAVIS: I got an idea. I'll take one of these long swords and I'll put it in the bag.

SAM: Might just poke through the the thing. Why don't we do something that won't poke through?

TRAVIS: Too late. It's happening.

MATT: It vanishes into the satchel.

(gasping)

TRAVIS: Motherfucker!

MARISHA: What else could be in here?

TRAVIS: Ooh, that's right.

SAM: I'm going to reach in and think of--

LAURA: (whispering) Doughnuts. Think of something good to eat.

SAM: Finger foods!

MATT: Nothing comes out.

LAURA: Think of something magical. Think of poop.

SAM: I'm going to think of gems. Precious stones.

MATT: You don't get any stones, no.

LAURA: Think of jewelry. That was close, though. Think of jewelry.

SAM: How do you know that was close?

LAURA: I feel like it was.

MARISHA: Think of the heads of his enemies.

SAM: I don't want to touch that.

MARISHA: But what if they're in there? We don't want to be walking around with heads.

LAURA: I think of jewelry!

MATT: No jewelry.

MARISHA: He's looking at something. There's something in there!

TRAVIS: What's in it?! SAM: We'll take it to Caleb!

LAURA: Here's the thing. I do know that with my haversack-- where is it, by the way? Who has my haversack?

SAM: We have it.

MARISHA: I think Caleb has it, actually, yeah.

MATT: Which is great too, when you see the dirty coat and the giant, bright, hot pink haversack over the shoulder. It's a pretty great visual.

LIAM: I was waiting for the right moment to give it back.

LAURA: If you cut the haversack, all of its contents spill out.

SAM: You could've ruined it! Oh, but wait--

LAURA: From the outside. If you cut it from the outside, if you pierce it, all of its stuff falls out.

MARISHA: Can we repair after that?

LAURA: No, it's doneskies.

SAM: Let's see what Caleb can do with it first.

TRAVIS: True, yeah. Are there any books in his room specifically for Caleb?

MATT: Looking through, not much of a reader. Not a lot of readers in here. The few of any sort of magical persuasion, none of it was knowledge-based. Most of it was instinct or natural innate ability.

TRAVIS: Piece of shit ability, is that what you mean?

MATT: Sure.

MARISHA: Douchebag ability.

SAM: Can I go through and look around for any papers or documents that would point to anyone else that he was working for or selling to?

MATT: You guys did together. This is the next hour, hour and a half of you guys going through as much as you can, as quickly as you can, because you are still not supposed to be seen or found in connection with this. You all eventually gather everything and come back to Caleb.

LIAM: You find him-- while they were gone, Caleb, holding the huge slash on his chest together, and the coat is ripped, laid down next to Yasha, looking at the ceiling. After a long moment of silence, said: Oh, that's quite a day, *ja*?

LAURA: You're injured? I didn't even know! Is everybody injured?

LIAM: I'm sorry we weren't faster.

MARISHA: We're a little banged up, but we're fine.

LIAM and MARISHA: We're fine.

LAURA: (whispering) Why was he talking to Yasha?

TRAVIS: Heal, Jester.

MARISHA: What time is it actually?

MATT: You would gather at this time it's maybe close to three in the morning. Sunrise is not that far away.

TRAVIS: Did we see Caduceus upstairs?

MATT: Yeah, Caduceus is in the kitchen cooking, and you begin to hear some pots rattle aroun, and you smell some nice scents of fried herbs and veggies and some other non-meat based food preparation.

TRAVIS: Before we get back down to Caleb I say: do you need a hand?

TALIESIN: Oh no, I'm fine. I've got this. This is no problem.

TRAVIS: Oh. Okay. I'll go back down--

TALIESIN: If you find anything that looks good to eat, actually, bring it back up. I'll cook it right up. That's no problem.

TRAVIS: From downstairs?

TALIESIN: You never know. It's a good basement. You could keep a lot of roots down there. It'd be very fresh.

TRAVIS: Roots.

TALIESIN: Potatoes, turnips, carrots. Roots.

TRAVIS: Yeah, roots. Sure.

TALIESIN: You've had a carrot before, right?

TRAVIS: Yeah, no I've had a carrot.

TALIESIN: Ah yeah that's good. They're really good.

TRAVIS: Do I smell anything in the-- no, it smells like breakfast. Fuck it. I go back downstairs.

(laughter)

TRAVIS: Patchouli.

(laughter)

MARISHA: Hey, Matt? Question. Do I-- between me and Caleb-- who has keen memory-- would we remember how many prisoners were in the stronghold including these guys?

MATT: Including these guys?

LIAM: Caleb would know how many they've seen.

MARISHA: And escaped. How many did we let go including Shakäste?

MATT: Including Shakäste, if I'm recalling… Nine?

LIAM: *Nein*?

MATT: Nine.

MARISHA: Is that what "deliver goods polished" means? Nine delivered? Okay, just making sure.

TRAVIS: Yep. Polished...

MARISHA: We have polished-- does that mean like--?

TRAVIS: Erased.

MARISHA: Beaten in? Yeah, erased.

SAM: All right.

MARISHA: Broken.

SAM: Let's get the fuck out of here.

TRAVIS: You don't want to get a little healing first in case there are fucking hyenas outside or some shit?

SAM: There's bears.

TRAVIS: Oh that counts.

SAM: There's bone bears.

TRAVIS: Bone bears?

LAURA: Caleb is slashed across his chest.

SAM: There's also a road so we'll be okay.

TALIESIN: Can I hear this conversation?

SAM: Sure, we're around.

TALIESIN: I'd recommend staying the night; you're all pretty banged up.

TRAVIS: Yeah, I was going to say we do have cover here, right?

TALIESIN: There's even beds.

SAM: What if they have others working with them who come home?

TRAVIS: That is a good point.

MARISHA: Someone will keep watch.

LAURA: That worked out really well for us last time.

TRAVIS: Okay, let's take it easy.

LIAM: Are we all in the same room at this point?

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MATT: At this point you guys have gathered together we'll say.

MARISHA: We handed you that haversack.

LIAM: I have a-- Never mind, I'll tell you tomorrow.

LAURA: Cure Wounds.

LIAM: This is-- Oh!

LAURA: Because I'm a healer. I'm a really good one.

SAM: What's that new magic you used?

(laughter)

SAM: Amazing!

LAURA: I know. It's pretty impressive.

MARISHA: Healers are like cats. You have to have two so they can keep each other motivated. So funny.

TRAVIS: One's just fat and never moves.

MARISHA: (laughing) Competition.

LIAM: I have been carrying this for you.

LAURA: My bag! Thank you, Caleb! Although, it looks really good with your coat.

LIAM: I know.

LAURA: Thank you.

LIAM: Looks better on you.

TRAVIS: We didn't find any books upstairs, sorry.

LIAM: No, I didn't think-- Thank you.

SAM: We found a strange bag. Maybe, when you're feeling a little better, you can look at it and tell us its magicalness.

LIAM: Yep. Oh, now?

SAM: Oh no, whenever you like.

LIAM: Who has it?

LAURA: I hold my bag up to Caduceus-- Cad's hair. Does it match?

LIAM: Okay, book out and on the floor and start tracing the symbols on the floor and give me ten minutes.

MARISHA: I'm going to lay down and take a short rest, as Beau's feeling rough.

TALIESIN: There's food.

MARISHA: Tired. I'm going to eat some of Caduceus' food.

MATT: Caduceus eventually comes and joins you guys, with platters of all sorts of well-cooked, well-spiced, organic vegetables, and whatever else you happen to have on you.

TALIESIN: It's D&D: Everything's organic!

MATT: True.

MARISHA: Mushrooms, and beans.

LIAM: Blood pudding.

MARISHA: So good.

LIAM: Mmm, coffee.

MATT: So what are you casting, Caleb?

LIAM: Hmm?

MATT: What are you casting?

LIAM: Oh, Identify.

MATT: Identify, okay.

LAURA: Whoa, it's long!

TALIESIN: That's an epic poem right there.

LIAM: You guys know what this is!

SAM: No.

LAURA: Is it?

MARISHA: Is it the thing? Is it The Bag?

LIAM: This is a bottomless bag.

TRAVIS: Bottomless bag?

SAM: Different from what we have?

MATT: Well, it's got a bottom.

LIAM: It can hold a lot, though. It can hold a lot. More than--

LAURA: Can it hold more than mine?

LIAM: Yeah.

LAURA: Well, then it's expensive. Because mine was very pricey and it holds some stuff.

TRAVIS: If you knew how to bargain, maybe.

LAURA: What is that?

LIAM: Who wants it?

SAM: Who wants it?

LAURA: Whoa! What happened? I mean, I know what happened. Fuck.

TRAVIS: How about I hold it for you?

LIAM: Yeah. Tradition.

TRAVIS: (singing) Tradition! Wow!

LAURA: You can cook?

TALIESIN: I definitely *can* cook. I mean, whether or not it's any good, I'm not sure. But if everybody's happy with it.

LIAM: What are we doing? Are we staying here, or are we hitting the road?

LAURA: I just start scarfing.

MATT: Make sure you know everything it can do, so you guys don't--

MARISHA: Sorry. I was napping for a moment, what?

LIAM: Badass, what do you want to do? Are we staying here, or are we hitting the road?

SAM: Well, you're the leader, Caleb. You tell us.

LAURA: You're the leader?

SAM: Oh yes! He took a position of authority while you were gone, and he rose to the occasion.

LAURA: Oh, that's wonderful, Caleb. I'm very proud of you.

TALIESIN: Ah, Mr. Caleb, you don't really look in the state to travel, really. I mean, just to point it out, you've taken a bit of a beating today.

LIAM: Well, I don't always look great, but point taken.

TALIESIN: There's a bed upstairs.

MARISHA: I think we should stay here.

LAURA: We can all sleep in the same bedroom and you can put your wire thingy in front of it, and then we'll know if anyone tries to break in.

MARISHA: We can drag mattresses down into the living room, light a fire.

SAM: Have a fort party?

MARISHA: Fort party.

LIAM: That's a good idea. I have a surprise for you all.

LAURA: What is it?

LIAM: (shushing) (groaning) Oh, shit.

TRAVIS: Is there light in where we are? Is there torchlight or anything in the lower space?

MATT: I think you guys are probably not hanging down in the torture dungeon now, which has very low red light from occasional low-burning wall sconces. The main chambers are well-lit with torches in the hallway areas, and the interior chambers are a little low-lit. So there is light; there's just not a lot.

TRAVIS: Can I take the bag and hold it up under a light source and look in, see if there's stuff rumbling around and it just looks empty?

MATT: You look inside, and it looks pretty empty.

TRAVIS: Can I shake it, does it make any noise?

MATT: No noise.

TRAVIS: I'll reach in and just grab the inside of it and turn it out, see if there's stuff.

MATT: Okay. As you pull the bag inside-out, it jolts away from one side of your grasp, and a bunch of things spill out of it onto the ground. (clattering, clanging)

MARISHA: From the bag?

MATT: From the bag.

SAM and LAURA: How'd you do that? What is that? What's in there? What was it?

MARISHA: He just flipped it inside out!

LIAM: Yeah, take all the hidden goodies inside. It's a piñata.

TRAVIS: Yeah. I have deep arcane ability.

SAM: What is it? What'd we get?

LAURA: Did you pierce it? Is it ruined forever now?

TRAVIS: No, I just turned it inside out, and all this shit poured out.

MARISHA: Magic.

TALIESIN: I'm going to pick up a couple things.

LIAM: Yer a wizard, Harry!

TRAVIS: (Harry Potter voice) I'm a what? (Hagrid voice) And a thumpin' good one, I'd wager.

MATT: The heavy noise that draws you guys over to this involves collecting 101 platinum pieces that were in the bag--

(yelling)

LAURA: Whoa!

LIAM: We are dumbasses.

MATT: Four additional sets of manacles.

TRAVIS: Shit.

LAURA: Those things-- those fucking things!

MARISHA: Why do these things follow us everywhere?

LAURA: They're evil! Those are really evil!

TALIESIN: The big villain for this campaign will become Mister Manacle.

LAURA: Did the lady ever say anything when she was casting, or was it just touching?

MATT: It was just casting a spell, and she wasn't always touching it necessarily. She was just near it, and sometimes would touch it.

LAURA: (growling)

MATT: About two dozen teeth clatter to the ground, from varying backgrounds, and levels of decay. A meat hook: a handheld meat hook. Looks a bit rusted.

LAURA: Gross.

MATT: There is a red gem: a well-carved red gem about that big, not quite a ruby, called a corundum gem. A sealed envelope-- a wax-sealed envelope, but as part of the seal there's a coin pressed into the seal.

LAURA: A special coin? What does the coin look like?

MATT: That's what it looks like.

TRAVIS: Oh, fuck! Physical props!

MATT: In fact, you recognize it immediately. This is called a galley.

LAURA: This is a galley.

MATT: A galley is specifically a gold piece that is produced along the Menagerie Coast.

LAURA: Ooh, it even smells good. It smells like home!

SAM: Maybe we should open it.

LAURA: Is it trapped?

SAM: I will look at the coin for traps!

MATT: Make an investigation check.

LIAM: Caleb is doing the silver wire while that happens.

SAM: 23!

MATT: Okay. It does not appear to be trapped.

LAURA: You guys, should I open it?

MARISHA: Looks like there's a handprint on the back.

LAURA: Ew, is it blood? Does it look like blood, or-- it looks like somebody spilled their hand in tea or coffee.

MATT: It's a little more like the grease stain of somebody who was holding it, not necessarily any bloodstain. Like Lorenzo maybe had grasped it while a little greasy.

LAURA: Should I open it?

SAM: Yes! It could be a wedding invitation!

LAURA: Okay, I did it already. Ooh!

TRAVIS: Oh my god, this is so awesome.

LAURA: Oh goodness-- whoa, what is this thing? There's a drawing on it. It's a really good drawing.

MARISHA: Oh. It is a very good drawing.

TRAVIS: That a peach?

LIAM: It's a cantaloupe.

LAURA: It's like a melon with a cut in it. Many thanks to you-- What is that name?

SAM: Jonas?

LAURA: Ionos, I think is what it is.

SAM: Maybe.

MATT: It's an I.

LAURA: For dealing with the thieves who appropriated my possession. Reliability like this will prove profitable for you and your house, should you continue to be. One half of our agreed payment is enclosed-- (gasp) Is that what the hundred platinum was? One *half* of it? With the other being paid upon recovery of the Cloven Crystal-- I think that's what this thing is. It is imperative that you find this bauble and return it to me. It has great sentimental value to me and my family. This rendering should suffice to guide the discerning eyes of your hunters."

MARISHA: I pull out the red gem and hold it next to the picture. Does it look like the same?

MATT: The red gem is just a square-shaped, hewed gem. That looks like a crystal sphere with a giant, hacked crack across the front of it.

SAM: "Time is of the essence, and should I not have it by the end of--"

MATT: It's really familiar to you, though.

SAM: Queen... pillar? Queen's--

LAURA: Quen'pillar?

SAM: Quen'pillar? Is that a month? What is that?

MATT: Quen'pillar is a month, yes. It's the next month.

LAURA: Yeah, we know that month.

SAM: "Time is of the essence. Should I not have it by the end of Quen'pillar, I will be forced to end our agreement and seek a business relationship elsewhere. I warn you: we are fiercely loyal to those who appease us, and staunchly resentful to those who do *not*."

LAURA: And then he said, "Ah!" when he was writing it, for sure.

SAM: "When recovered, please deliver to--"

LAURA: "Marius LePual at the Wayfarer's Cove."

SAM: Thank you? No-- "Tell him you have a gift--"

SAM and LAURA: "for the Captain."

LAURA: And it's signed--

SAM and LAURA: Avantika!

MATT: The Wayfarer's Cove you're also familiar with. It's one of the three main shipping yards of Nicodranas.

LAURA: That is-- you guys.

SAM: What's the gist of this letter? Someone hired someone to get some stuff back from a thief. There's more stuff. If they don't get it soon, someone will be pissed off. Marius LePen?

LAURA: Wait… Somebody hired-- Oops! Do you think somebody hired Lorenzo to do this? Or do you think that Lorenzo stole this from somebody--

TRAVIS: Jester, will you hold up that letter so that I can see the drawing, please?

LAURA: Do you recognize it, Fjord?

TRAVIS: Doesn't everybody?

LAURA: It looks kind of like a cantaloupe with a hole in it--

SAM: Oh yes! Yes, we saw one of these! It's in your belly!

LAURA: Is that what's in your belly?

MATT: It's pretty damn close.

MARISHA: Ah!

TRAVIS: It looks like an eye.

LAURA: Wait, wait, wait! We just need to return--

SAM: Hold on, this letter was for you?! Are you Marius LePen?

LAURA: Do you know Avantika?!

TRAVIS: I just sit down on the floor and lean back against the wall.

LAURA: Have you ever been to the Wayfarer's Cove?

TRAVIS: No. Well--

LAURA: I have. I've been there before.

TRAVIS: That's not true, I have.

MARISHA: But you're from the Menagerie Coast, that's when you guys met.

TRAVIS: I've been there--

LAURA: Yeah, but he wasn't in Nicodranas with me.

TRAVIS: I've been to those harbors before. Many times.

LAURA: Wait wait wait! If we bring you there, we'll get a hundred platinum, you think?

SAM: Where did we find this?

LIAM: Excuse me just a moment, I'm sorry. Does anyone have a glass bead? Just a glass bead: cheap, doesn't matter.

TRAVIS: No, I don't think so.

SAM: Glass bead?

LAURA: Do I have something on me? Would I have a glass bead?

LIAM: You have fifty rings; do you have a glass bead? Necklaces, anything? Do you wear a glass bead on you?

MARISHA: I gave my beaded bracelet to Nott. Nott, you still have my beaded bracelet, right?

SAM: Was it beaded? The jade bracelet?

MARISHA: The jade beaded bracelet?

LAURA: It's jade, it's not glass.

LIAM: Do you have a bead?

MARISHA: Would it work?

SAM: I have shards of shiny pottery, silverware from the fish people. Human jerky, a dead rat--

TRAVIS: *Human* jerky? Where the fuck have *you* guys been?

SAM: A vase, some old flowers--

LIAM: Your rings, do any of them have just a glass-- are they costume jewelry?

LAURA: Sure.

LIAM: He pries it-- He's not very good at it.

LAURA: Aw, man. I really liked the look of that.

MATT: You bring out a really nice pearl.

LIAM: Yeah, okay, good. Throws the ring away.

LAURA: No, I can mend it! Caleb.

LIAM: As you were. Then he starts muttering again and walking around the circle that the silver wire makes.

MATT: You get the sense that it's not a real pearl. This is a pretty cheap piece of jewelry.

SAM: Okay, wait. Let the masters work here.

LAURA: Okay, let's figure this out.

SAM: Where did we see that? Where was that? Was that in the tree? That was in the tree.

LAURA: No, that was in that thing--

TRAVIS: Down underneath, in the well.

SAM: Underneath the tree, with the fish people.

MARISHA and LAURA: With the fish people.

MARISHA: They were like, worshiping it.

TRAVIS: What do they call those people?

MATT: They're called merrow.

TRAVIS: Merrow.

SAM: Okay, so the merrow stole that from a water place, right? The Way--

LAURA: You just spit on this letter. I saw it happen.

SAM: I'm a goblin, I spit.

LAURA: Did you know, Fjord, that the thing inside of you is called the Cloven Crystal?

SAM: Or the Clover Crystal?

TRAVIS: No, I didn't.

SAM: Cloven? Cloven Crystal.

LAURA: Well now we know *something*.

SAM: And the merrow stole it from someone here.

LAURA: Wait, do I know Marius LePule?

MATT: You have no idea who that is. You've lived in the town for a while, and you know a lot of things about the locations, but you haven't traveled around Nicodranas. The people you know are those that have come in and out of where you grew up, and that name does not ring a bell. Neither does the Captain.

SAM: This is a mystery.

LAURA: It is. We'll solve this.

TRAVIS: Can I see it for just a second? I'll give it right back.

SAM: It's evidence! Wear gloves.

LAURA: Make sure you don't get your fingerprints all over it!

MATT: I would like Caleb and Beauregard, and Fjord, actually-- the three of you to roll intelligence checks.

LAURA: Why not us? Why aren't we--

LIAM: Caleb is not paying attention to anything going on.

MATT: That's true. So just Beauregard.

TRAVIS: Seven.

MARISHA: Just straight intelligence?

MATT: Mm-hmm.

MARISHA: Oh boy. Five.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: Bummer.

LAURA: Would I roll an intelligence check?

MATT: No.

LAURA: Damn it. Is this a real coin?

MATT: That is a real coin, yes. It is a gold coin; if you'd like to take it off of the envelope, you may add one gold to your--

LAURA: No, it's so pretty on the envelope, though.

SAM: Avantika?

TRAVIS: Evan-tee-ca? Ev-ahn-tica?

LAURA: It really does smell like home.

MARISHA: Ionos.

SAM: The Captain. The Captain was the person who stole it? No. What?

LAURA: No, the Captain-- he has the letter, I can't tell you.

TRAVIS: "Tell him you have a gift for the Captain when you see Marius--"

LAURA: LePual.

TRAVIS: "LePual at the Wayfarer's Cove." (inhale) Well, I have the Cloven Crystal. I do not have access to it at the moment.

LAURA: I poke his belly. Do I feel a little hard spot on it? Do I feel it? I rub it. Do I feel a little circle on there? Little globe under the armor there?

TRAVIS: Please. Stop.

MATT: Fjord is expecting.

TRAVIS: Maybe we should have Caleb check out some of these items. I mean, what if this meat hook, like, you know--

LIAM: He's muttering and walking in circles.

TRAVIS: -- is magic; you throw it and it comes back to you or some shit.

LAURA: You should just try throwing it and see if it comes back to you.

MARISHA: Matt, what was the Cult of the Caustic Heart? I'm trying to remember.

MATT: Which one?

MARISHA: Cult of the Caustic Heart?

MATT: The Cult of the Caustic Heart. That was, if I recall, with Calianna.

LAURA: Ooh!

MARISHA: Yep, yeah. Yep, that's exactly what that was.

TRAVIS: The two dozen teeth, are there any of the tusk variety?

MATT: Looking over them, it appears that one of them would be similar to a tusk, yes.

TRAVIS: Can I take that?

MATT: Sure.

LIAM: Everybody hears some muttering behind them of words they don't understand, and then they hear Caleb say: Huaah! A large bubble goes (voom) in the entire entryway, and there is a giant half-dome of pale, orangish-brown energy; and then you just see Caleb's head go "Hey, look what I made!" (whoosh)

SAM: What is it?

TRAVIS: What is *that*?

LAURA: Can we go into it?

MARISHA: Are we going-- (gasps) Is it a dope pillow fort?

TRAVIS: Can we see through it?

MATT: At the moment? Looking at the specifics of this...

LAURA: (shouting) Caleb, can you hear through it?

LIAM: (shouting) *Ja*!

LAURA: Can we come into it?

LIAM: Only you!

LAURA: Yeah!

SAM: Is there a door?

LAURA: Do I just hit the side of it? How do I get in?

LIAM: No, you walk in and as soon as you're in and look back where you came, you don't see what you walked through, you just see the room and everybody around it. (whispering) They can all come in, but be quiet.

LAURA: Okay. This is so cool! Well, you need pillows in here, Caleb. This is really neat.

SAM: I'm going to walk in. Did it work?

LIAM: Hello.

SAM: Hi! Ooh!

TRAVIS: Does sound come out of it? Do I hear them talking?

SAM: Yeah!

LIAM: Probably.

SAM: Hi!

TRAVIS: Are you okay?

LIAM: Yeah, you can't see us, but we can see you. I've been working on this for weeks.

LAURA: This is really cool!

MATT: It looks like a solid dome of faintly orange-ish brown colored energy and you can pass through it. It feels like there's nothing there except for the temperature on the inside. It's nice and comfortable.

LAURA: Can anybody come through, or only your friends? Only people that you like.

LIAM: You can come in.

LAURA: That means you like me.

TRAVIS: I'm going to try and push my hand through.

MATT: It goes through.

LIAM: I pull Fjord in.

TRAVIS: (yells) Cool.

LIAM: So the idea behind this is that if we sleep in a field or something, nobody's going to come and take us off to be tortured in the night.

LAURA: I like that idea. A lot.

LIAM: We can go through it, you can go through it, I can go through it-- well, I have to stay inside it, but (chair squeaks) excuse me.

LAURA: Did you just fart?

SAM: Oh, now we're trapped in here with the fart! It's like a big Dutch oven!

TRAVIS: Oh god it's magnified. It's unbelievable! Human jerky!

LIAM: I have bigger ideas for a big place, but I can't... But this I can do!

SAM: It's a starter house, right?

LIAM: A yurt.

SAM: Yeah.

LAURA: I like it, it's cozy.

SAM: I like it, too.

LIAM: It feels like outside, but, you know. Also, if we're ever in a tight spot and we know something--

LAURA: (devious chuckling)

TRAVIS: First game back.

MARISHA: Yep.

LIAM: I don't know if I'm looking at Laura or Jester-- if we're ever in a tight spot, I can also do this if we are in real danger. That's a little tricky because it takes some time to do it.

SAM: Yes. It's brilliant. I love it! Caduceus, come check it out.

TALIESIN: I'm going to walk in. Yeah, this is really nice.

(laughter)

SAM: How tall is he? Is his head touching the ceiling?

TRAVIS: Yeah, how tall is Caduceus?

TALIESIN: Tall.

LAURA: How tall?

TALIESIN: About seven feet tall.

MATT: Yeah, he's a tall fellow.

SAM: How tall is the roof in here?

LIAM: Like a hundred feet up, I think.

MATT: The dome is about a ten foot radius.

TALIESIN: So ten feet at the top.

LIAM: I couldn't make any furniture yet. But anyway, in a pinch, and tonight. And the alarm is up.

SAM: You can do both at the same time?

LIAM: It's been done, Nott.

SAM: You're incredible!

MARISHA: Beau goes out, grabs a bunch of pillows from the couches and starts throwing them in.

MATT: A voice on the outside goes, "Uh, where'd everyone go?"

SAM: Oh, sorry.

LAURA: Who's that?

SAM: That's Keg, probably. Keg, we're in here!

MARISHA: Hey, Keg.

MATT: Can she come in?

LIAM: Of course.

MATT: Keg steps in. You see the dirt smeared side of the face of this really intense, square-jawed dwarf woman with what was once five o'clock shadow that is now coming into some decent stubble now. Short, reddish brown hair. Currently in the last elements of a hand rolled cigarette, in full armor, smattered with blood.

LIAM: I can't make a side bubble, so-- I don't mean to intrude, but what you said--

MARISHA: Stop talking to me, Caleb.

MATT: "Hey, so I guess we saved you?"

LAURA: You helped?

MATT: (doubtful groans)

SAM: Yeah, she fought bravely.

TALIESIN: Quite a bit.

LAURA: Thank you.

TRAVIS: Appreciate you.

LAURA: I don't know what would have happened without you guys. Really.

SAM: You would have been tortured and brainwashed. Sold and probably killed in a few months in a horrible--

LAURA: I don't know. I feel like I would be really nice to have around the house. People might have kept me around.

TRAVIS: Well.

MARISHA: That's not-- That doesn't make anything better.

SAM: But thank you, Keg. You were amazing.

MATT: "I'm just happy to make up for past mistakes."

LAURA: I drag Yasha's body into the thing with us.

TRAVIS: I'll go gather up the money and the teeth and the meat hook and the red gem and all that shit in the bag. And then turn it back out.

MATT: Teeth and coin and gem all come clattering to the middle of your circle.

TRAVIS: I brought you stuff to identify.

LIAM: That's a lot. I will spend the next hour or so before bed going through every single thing slowly and methodically with my spellbook.

MATT: The potion that you found earlier is magical.

LIAM: And that gem that you had, Beauregard. The red gem.

MATT: The red gem is also magical.

MARISHA: Yes!

MATT: The sets of manacles emit a faint magical aura.

MARISHA: All the things! Yes!

SAM: What did we get?

LIAM: Leave me alone, I'm reading.

SAM: Okay.

TRAVIS: Meat hook?

MATT: Meat hook is not magical.

TRAVIS: Damn it.

LIAM: This has great power.

SAM: What is it?

LIAM: It's a meat hook.

TRAVIS: What's it do?

LAURA: You look really scary with it on you.

SAM: Whoa! It's probably been through people's skulls, actually.

TRAVIS: Yeah, probably.

SAM: I'll take it. You said there was lots of shortbows and longbows? Arrows?

TRAVIS: Six shortswords.

SAM: Bolts?

MATT: There are bolts. If you wanted to restock, there's probably close to 300 bolts.

SAM: I'll fill up. Also, I'll take some arrows as well.

MATT: Probably about a hundred arrows.

MARISHA: Anything I can throw?

MATT: I'd say yeah. If you're looking around I say you find an errant dagger or two.

MARISHA: I'll take an errant dagger or two.

MATT: Two daggers.

MARISHA: Two daggers.

MATT: Not too difficult to locate in this space.

LIAM: Is this what Yasha had on her? Yeah.

SAM: All right. Should we go to sleep?

TRAVIS: I'll make sure Caleb's square.

LIAM: No, we're good. This potion will give you a silver tongue for an hour or so.

LAURA: Like you'll be a really good talker?

LIAM: Yeah, like this one over here. Or made this one inhuman. I'll come back to this. This is the manacles Yasha had on her when we found her. This is strange, you put them on a person and someone like me, maybe Fjord, could make that person fall asleep for at least a day.

LAURA: That's what all of us were wearing, dude.

LIAM: Well, now we have it.

LAURA: What do I say to make them fall asleep?

LIAM: Nothing.

LAURA: I don't want it.

MATT: Glancing over the chains, you can only begin to fathom how many people have been put in that set.

LAURA: I don't want it at all.

LIAM: I pocket it.

MATT: It's pretty big.

LIAM: What is it?

MATT: It's a set of manacles. It's like two wrist manacles--

LIAM: How big is it?

MATT: It's two cuffs for the wrists that goes behind the back, and then two cuffs that go around the ankles, and then chains that connect them. It's maybe about 15, 20 pounds of metal.

LIAM: (southern accent) I was thinking oversized handcuffs, but nevermind.

LAURA: (southern accent) That can go in the bag of holding for sure. Or the bottomless bag.

LIAM: You got that. You can have this, this is a gem that can summon a creature of fire.

MARISHA: What?

TRAVIS: A creature of fire?

LIAM: Yeah. That is amazing. That is powerful.

MARISHA: I mean, I feel like fire is kind of your thing. You sure you want me to have this?

LIAM: It's not my thing.

LAURA: It kind of is your thing.

LIAM: Not me and me alone.

MARISHA: That's true, there are like four elements. Means you're going to be sharing a lot. There's going to be a lot of overlap.

LIAM: I'm good.

MARISHA: Yeah. I'll hold to it.

MATT: You guys all resting up for the evening? As the sun is right about now, Caleb, rising. It's about 5:30 in the morning.

LIAM: Is it? Ooh.

MATT: You guys have been doing all this through the night.

TRAVIS: Are we taking a long rest?

LIAM: Yeah. Sleep until the afternoon.

TRAVIS: Before I turn in, can I sit with Molly's sword?

MATT: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Staring at it. Thank you, you were very kind to me. I hope to do right by you and make it up to you one day. And I'll try to concentrate on the sword.

MATT: Okay. As you focus and attune to the weapon, you feel the essence of the blade that you had previously bound yourself to begin to slip. Faint, interior rumbling of your ribcage begins to feel like a heavy bass that is quaking on the inside of your torso. It's uncomfortable at first, and then you realize it's this burrowing, for lack of a better term, appetite with the previous weapon now gone and that void, that hunger, focusing in. You're looking at the blade and you blink and as your eyes open, that shadowed depths are around you once more. You look around for an instant and all you see is the deep, dark recesses of some endless ocean. You look down at the blade in your grasp, the Summer's Dance blade, and then blink once more and you're back in the chamber and it's gone from your hand.

SAM: The blade's gone?

MATT: Yeah.

LAURA: Dude, you just swallowed that thing whole. Like totally.

MATT: You guys watched as he focused on it over time, the blade seemed to fade away. It looks like the exterior begins to turn to ash and crumble, but then nothing hits the ground below it. Then it's gone.

LIAM: We all saw this?

MATT: All those who were paying attention and hadn't gone to sleep yet.

MARISHA: Where does all this stuff inside of you go? You have so much extra storage space in you.

TRAVIS: Yeah, I'm kind of like this bag of holding, huh?

MARISHA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Yeah. I don't know. I want to keep Molly with us, though. With me.

MARISHA: I know what you mean.

MATT: With that awkward silence, you see Keg staring straight out, the guilt on the face of the mention of Molly once more. "I'm going to have to-- I'm just going to leave you guys to rest. I'm going to take some me time." Then backs out of the dome and one quick glance at Beau as she exits.

MARISHA: I poke my head out and I go: You owe me a night! And I go back in. I pop back in and I go: I'll be back in like an hour and 20 minutes.

TRAVIS: Why don't you make it two hours?

MARISHA: If it's two hours, don't come looking for me. If it's two and a half, then get worried.

TRAVIS: You're explaining too much.

MARISHA: All right. Follow Keg.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: Can I look in the haversack? Is my sketchbook still in there?

MATT: Your sketchbook is.

LAURA: Going to get out my sketchbook and I'm going to leave the little bubble for a little bit and wander out and I see Beau and Keg. I wander a little further away and I sit down with my sketchbook.

MARISHA: You just see blankets. It's like when the Sims.

LIAM: You just see a windmill of legs.

LAURA: "Woohoo." I'm going to try to think of what to draw for the last few days to tell the Traveler about, but I don't really know what to draw. Instead I just write: "Well, why didn't you come?" and then I close the book. I go back inside after a little bit.

MATT: Okay. You all finish a very necessary long night's rest. Coming to consciousness as the dome vanishes, exposing the center of the base floor walkway, where Caleb had set up both the protections of his spells and the dome in the first place. Beau has not returned.

TRAVIS: Atta girl.

MATT: You all wake up. The front door which is right across from where you are is partially ajar, partway open.

LIAM: I go outside and get some fresh air and see what I see.

MATT: Okay. Make a perception check.

LIAM: 17.

MATT: You walk outside. It's early afternoon now. It's *chilly.* Snowfall has set in now, and there is a faint snowfall over the entire grounds of the interior of this courtyard where the trees have been cleared for the construction of The Sour Nest, is just white. You see it gathering up on the tops of the walls on the outside. It's almost beautiful, if not for the connotation of where you are. All around you, on the outskirts of the wall you can see where the white is dusting over the purple and grays of the Savalirwood that surrounds you. You do notice, across the way, the open gates on the southern side of the wall that enters into the courtyard are also partially ajar. You see faint footsteps leading from the gate to where you are.

LIAM: Are they deep, heavy dwarf footprints?

MATT: They are, and they're heading away from you.

LIAM: I rub my thumb along the lucky rock in my pocket, and smile at the snow and think about playing in it when I was younger, and go inside to wake up anyone who's still sleeping.

MATT: Okay. Beau, at one point you did wake up this morning. Halfheartedly, as some people aren't as stealthy in their exits as others.

LIAM: Cling clang, clung clung!

MATT: Open one eye and glance over, and the door closes.

MARISHA: I chuckle and roll over and go back to sleep. Smile as I dig into my pillow.

MATT: All right. You all come to consciousness as Caleb wakes you. On the outskirts of the dome by where Nott was sleeping, there is a tiny little piece of paper.

SAM: Oh, it's a note! For me! It's really badly written. It's like Frankenstein wrote a letter.

LIAM: Name is spelled wrong, too.

LAURA: "Sory."

SAM: Should I read it to you guys? It says, "Nott, sorry for going before you woke up. Bad at goodbyes, never really had friends before. Yuto was my only friend, but now you and I are friends. This "medalon," "medalion," "medallon--" this thing, was from Yuto. It will protect you. Thank you for helping me. Keg. P.S. If anyone hurts you I will kill them." "Kill" is spelled wrong.

MATT: There is, underneath the paper where you pulled it away, you saw it was a medallion that was hanging from the bottom of her warhammer. It has a symbol of a star or a sun of multiple points sticking out on all sides.

SAM: I'll take it and put it around my neck.

MATT: All right.

SAM: I am now invincible.

TRAVIS: Oh shit! Medallion of cigar smoke. Medallion of stogies.

MARISHA: Medallion of five o'clock shadow.

MATT: Have to have one character in every campaign that grows facial hair for no reason.

TRAVIS: You fucking know it.

LIAM: A charmed bracelet of dwarvenkind? Just gets a little bit of stumble.

LAURA: Did you cast Identify on the ruby thingy at all?

TRAVIS: Yeah, I didn't do nothing.

MATT: Beau, you wake up and there is a letter.

TRAVIS: Fucking secret Santa in this bitch!

MARISHA: Oh my god.

TALIESIN: I hope it's a terrible drawing of some-- sorry.

MARISHA: You guys, I've never gotten morning after--

(laughter)

TRAVIS: (wheezing) That's fucking great!

MARISHA: It's almost as good as the Kerrek letter, you guys!

TRAVIS: The immediate regret!

(laughter)

MARISHA: Hang on, you've got to have the full experience. First off, "For Bo," spelled wrong.

SAM: (reading) "Bo," everything's crossed out, "Thanks."

(laughter)

MATT: Those letters were actually written by Ashly Burch for you guys.

TRAVIS: Oh yeah?! Oh, amazing.

MATT: Yeah.

MARISHA: "I love--"

TRAVIS: You can see it!

MARISHA: You can see it! She was trying to write, "Your eyes are beautiful when you smile. I love-- Thanks."

LIAM: Amazing.

MARISHA: I'll cherish this forever.

TRAVIS: I forgot to ask. Before we do anything else, Lorenzo's glaive, his weapon, did we get that?

MATT: It was left below, yeah.

MARISHA: I feel like we grabbed it, right?

MATT: Yeah, you have it. It's a wicked looking weapon.

LIAM: Just give it to me.

TRAVIS: Yeah, I'll go grab it and give it to Caleb.

LIAM: (muttering)

MATT: It is not magical.

LIAM: That is magical, in that it is very finely crafted. But it doesn't do anything expect cut me across the chest quite deeply.

TRAVIS: If it had spelled the end of one of my closest friends I know I would want it, so we should probably keep it for Yasha when she wakes. In the Bag of Holding.

LAURA: Whoa, that bag is way better than my bag.

TRAVIS: It's pretty big.

LAURA: We could always dye that one pink too.

TRAVIS: We don't have to do that.

TALIESIN: I can help with that.

LAURA: You can?

TALIESIN: Yeah, probably.

LAURA: You can dye things colors?

TALIESIN: I mean, possibly it could work. I don't know, yeah maybe. Probably.

LIAM: We have a long way to walk, so is that what we're doing?

SAM: Where are we going?

LAURA: Oh! We have to finish the thing for The Gentleman, oh my gosh!

MARISHA: It's okay. We already got in touch.

LIAM: But also we should go back to Ophelia Mardoon.

MARISHA: With Ophelia Mardoon, who was-- yes that's what I was about to say.

TRAVIS: Glad you guys are keeping track.

LAURA: How much time do we left on that thing?

MARISHA: We're doing okay. We already got in touch with Ophelia, who is the woman we were supposed to get in contact with. We were like a day or so late, but she was fine with it. But she wanted us to go kill Lorenzo and the rest of the Iron Shepherds, so it was a very convenient killing one group of slavers with one stone.

LAURA: Oh, so you didn't really come to save us. You came to get the money.

SAM: No, no! We came to save you, the money's the bonus.

LAURA: I know, Nott! I know you did. I was just joking with you.

LIAM: No, it is true. The money meant fuck all.

TALIESIN: This is literally the first they've mentioned it in my presence, so.

LAURA: That means you get all of the money.

TALIESIN: Eh, I'm fine.

LAURA: Everybody's so generous here! You can give me all of the platinum, then. I don't mind.

LIAM: No, that is incorrect. I would like my share of the platinum to be sure. Any coin that we found, please.

SAM: Divide it up now?

TRAVIS: Caduceus, can I ask what your involvement is? How you became involved in this?

TALIESIN: I'll go so far as to say I feel that the fates have intertwined us for a while. I need to head east at some point.

LIAM: What is east?

TALIESIN: I don't know. But I'm going to find out. Everything's telling me that I should stick around and see where you're headed. I think that's where I'm supposed to be.

SAM: Didn't we promise to do something for you, like give you our blood or something?

LAURA: What?

SAM: We never really discussed the finer points. I assumed that you were a vampire and that you were going to suck our blood.

MARISHA: He makes dead people tea. It's very nice tea.

TRAVIS: He makes what?

SAM: He makes tea out of things that grow on corpses.

MARISHA: Cemetery tea.

MATT: Interesting point, too. Some of the corpses you passed by in the middle of the arena were starting to be overgrown with fungus. It's quite disgusting.

TRAVIS: You make dead people into tea.

TALIESIN: I mean, they're going to do it eventually anyway. I just usher the process along a little bit.

LAURA: Is it good tea?

TALIESIN: It's very good tea.

SAM: It's pretty good.

TALIESIN: To be fair I think we've had two rounds of it at this point. I've been making breakfast.

MARISHA: Honestly, you could make a lot of money setting up a shop somewhere and selling tea.

TALIESIN: Huh.

LAURA: Don't tell them it's dead people tea, and then wait until they drink it and then go, "Guess what that was made from!"

TALIESIN: I mean, all tea is really dead people tea when you think about it, so.

LIAM: Are we going to go to Ophelia first and then to Mollymauk, or?

MARISHA: Ophelia first, then Mollymauk. It's all along the way.

SAM: Sounds good.

TRAVIS: Should we wait for Yasha to wake up, or do we bring her with?

SAM: Oh, shoot.

TRAVIS: She's got a day and a spell.

MARISHA: There's some carts around back. Two, to be exact. Some horses that'll make up for Waterloo and-- or Water Closet and Loo and Toilet. Oh yeah by the way, we also lost like three horses. They're all dead, too.

SAM: All the horses are gone.

TRAVIS: Yeah, I figured.

LAURA: No, W.C.?

MARISHA: W.C.'s gone.

SAM: Crapper, John.

LIAM: He's in the fields.

LAURA: This is the worst.

TRAVIS: Kind of already was, but yeah.

SAM: But we have a new lease on life. We have new horses, we have a new day. Let's go name some horses and steal them!

MARISHA: Sounds good.

TRAVIS: Let's do it.

MATT: All right.

MARISHA: We steal horses. We make a nice little bed for Yasha and lay her down.

LAURA: We carry her out to the cart.

TRAVIS: I put her in the Bag of Holding and--

(laughter)

SAM: Are there invisible cages on the carts?

MATT: If you go ahead and check, the carts still appear to be saddled up with the cages. When you approach, it looks to be small bundles of produce and various packs, but upon reaching the edge and peering in, your face immediately goes past the illusion and you see the tarp, a heavy tarp that's laid over the cages. Pulling it open, the cages are still there in the cart, yes.

SAM: The cages are invisible, or whatever's in the tarp is invisible?

MATT: Best you can tell, whatever's under the tarp is invisible. Everything in the cart.

MARISHA: Can we break down the cages easily, or bring the cages off the cart?

MATT: They're pretty large cages. They're 6-foot by 4-foot by 4-foot. They're stacked up two at a time.

MARISHA: Can we get rid of them, though?

MATT: You can, yeah. You pull off the cages and pull off the tarp, and they all come out of the illusion, and they're normal.

LAURA: Can we put the tarp back up and get under the tarp and see if we can see each other?

MATT: You get under the tarp, and you're under a tarp.

SAM: If I stay outside and look in?

TRAVIS: It's not the tarp that's the source of the illusion.

MATT: You see all your friends getting under a tarp.

MARISHA: I put my hand through the cage bar. Do I see anything?

MATT: Nope.

MARISHA: Fuck!

SAM: Wait, what's invisible now?

MATT: Wait, you guys pulled the cages and the tarp off the cart.

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: Currently, nothing seems to be changed. The cart still looks like it's filled with some small bundles--

LAURA: I get up on the cart.

TALIESIN: The cart's magic.

MATT: The cart is where the illusion is focused. As Jester steps into the cart, she vanishes.

LAURA: Hey!

SAM: We have an invisible cart! How long will this last?

LAURA: (singing) Can you see me right now?

LIAM: Just give me ten goddamn minutes. Identify the cart.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: How does it work?

MATT: What it is, is it's a localized illusion to give a fake interior appearance of a cart, but that enchantment has been made permanent through some other magical means.

SAM: Cool.

MARISHA: Sick.

TRAVIS: We'll take it.

SAM: Stealth cart!

TRAVIS: Between the stealth cart and the dome, we're going to be rolling dirty.

LIAM: Also, how long was the ride from Shady Creek to this compound? Like three or four hours?

MATT: From Shady Creek? It's only about an hour or so. From Ophelia's, it's about an hour and a half by foot. By cart, you're not too sure. These woods can be thick and hard to get through in large carts.

LIAM: Oh, so slower by cart because--

MATT: Slower by cart because you're having to ferry it through some more difficult terrain.

LIAM: *Ja*. But worth it.

TALIESIN: Grab some stuff from the kitchen, some blankets from upstairs, some pillows so you can actually be comfortable in the cart. Yeah. Be nice.

MATT: All right. You grab two of the horses that are still set up on the exterior, you get them forded to the cart. You guys throw your cushions and blankets into the back. Who's going to be guiding the cart? There is still the front where the actual seat is where you can hold the reins and steer it where it goes.

LIAM: I'll sit up front.

TALIESIN: I'll join.

MATT: All right, so Caduceus and Caleb up front, the rest in the back?

MARISHA: I'll take one of the other horses.

SAM: We're going to take four horses.

LAURA: Oh, so nobody's in the cart. Except for Yasha.

SAM: We need horses to pull the cart, right?

LAURA: That is important, yes.

MATT: Two horses on the cart, two horses that are free, ridden by--

TRAVIS: Caduceus and Caleb.

LIAM: We're on the cart.

TRAVIS: That's right. I'll ride a horse.

MARISHA: I'll ride a horse.

MATT: All right. That puts Jester and Nott in the cart with Yasha. With that, you pull the cart free from what it seems to have sunken into some of the cold mud that seems to have closed around the wheels as the frozen temperatures of the snowfall caused it to harden. Eventually it pulls itself out of that section on the side of the Sour Nest and begins trekking, cutting its way, leaving little tracks in the snow along with the hoof prints. With that, Beauregard, you jump off and quickly push the gates outside from the courtyard out into the Savalirwood. With that, you begin to trek back towards Shady Creek Run, in the mid afternoon of this now somewhat cold, snowfallen portion of the day. And that's where we'll go ahead and take a break. Picking up with you guys approaching the fantastic Estate Sybaritic. Before we get to there, we're going to go ahead and do our giveaway. Today we have this awesome white oak tabletop dice tray from our friends at Wyrmwood. It's nice, smells good. It's got leather interior. It's kind of awesome. We need you guys to jump over to the Twitch chat on Critical Role, that's twitch.tv/criticalrole, during the break and enter, only once, the keyword tonight, which is "reunion."

TRAVIS: Reunion.

SAM: Aw.

MATT: Yes. Enter it once, more than once and you'll be disqualified. Once again, because of weird giveaway laws, only residents in the United States and Canada excluding Quebec are able to enter. Go ahead and jump over to the Critical Role Twitch chat, enter your code, and we'll see you back here in a little bit. All right, guys.

Break
[break]

Part II
MATT: And--

TALIESIN: Wow!

MARISHA: That was good! Snaps for that one!

LIAM: No snaps for that one!

TRAVIS: That was almost forensic.

TALIESIN: I've never felt anything like that before.

MATT: Welcome back, everyone. Laura will be back when she finishes feeding the baby.

LIAM: I feel like Lorenzo had his way with me just now.

MATT: However, we do have our winner of the giveaway at the break. It is LandonFoster1. Congratulations.

LIAM: Nice try, Foster.

MATT: I know, he's trying to win his own giveaways. Damn it! We'll have that sent to you ASAP. We'll contact you and get your information and congrats for your new Wyrmwood dice box coming your way. All righty. Y'all--

SAM and MARISHA: Happy Birthday Ashley!

MATT: Yes! For those who didn't know, it is Ashley Johnson's birthday.

TRAVIS: Today!

MARISHA: You could have said it, too!

LIAM: The reason we're not overflowing with "Happy Birthday" joy and radiance is because we also have a cold, dead, fury that she's not at the table.

MATT: Yeah, we wanted her here badly, but her shoot schedule did not allow it. We wish her happy birthday on social media and such. She is amazing and we love her, and we want her back ASAP.

LIAM: Come back.

MATT: Yes

MARISHA: (singing) Ashley, come back!

MATT: You all begin to make your way through this section of the Savalirwood, following the best pathways you can for the next hour, hour and a half before you begin to break into the North Clover area of this city. Trying to maneuver around carefully so as to not be conspicuous. Thankfully, the enchantment on the cart enables you to do so without much issue. However, it is also a very populated area with friends and enemies of the house you are traveling to. Who wants to be responsible for trying to remain inconspicuous?

LIAM: Remain inconspicuous, you mean in the open, not hidden by the illusion of the cart?

MATT: Yes, well, you still have four of you who are out in the open. Two on horseback, and two actually bringing the cart forward.

MARISHA: Weird question. The carts aren't sprayed on the side with "Iron Shepherds?"

TRAVIS: There's no branding we have to worry about?

TALIESIN: White Stallions! There's a Death Star painted on the side.

MARISHA: Okay, cool.

LIAM: Just a Jesus fish.

MARISHA: I'll flip my coat inside out to my brown side and put up the hood.

MATT: Perfect.

LIAM: I look like a peasant, I'll stay put.

TALIESIN: I'll switch to something inconspicuous. I'll join to the somewhat inconspicuous-looking humans attempting to create a uniform similar to Beau's.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: Oh shit! You can do that too, huh?

TALIESIN: Yeah.

SAM: Are you going to do that?

TRAVIS: Well, I don't want to be the only one. I'll make myself a disheveled brunet-looking guy with a sick-ass goatee.

MATT: All righty.

SAM: Me and Jester will be in the invisibility cone.

MARISHA: I take everything I just said back.

SAM: We're going to do each other's hair, and make faces at everyone else in the group.

TRAVIS: Birds galore.

MATT: This part in the afternoon, it's bustling enough towards the central main Clover Street. With your preparation, it doesn't seem that you catch too much attention, thankfully. You do eventually make your way to the outskirts of the two-story Estate Sybaritic where you see the familiar dark red wood and the fence with six-inch spear tips still aggressively daring anybody to vault over or make entry. The guards that you had previously encountered when you first arrived immediately turn, and you see the two on the inside of the courtyard, and the one that's outside of the gate as another one appears to be stepping into his position he had left for a moment. All look over as you begin to approach, get their crossbows ready. One of the guards at the very front, the one that's on the outside of the wall already, begins to approach with his hand on the side of a sheathed blade. "Who goes there?"

TRAVIS: What are we doing?

LIAM: Good evening. Good day. Good afternoon. We are expected by Miss Mardoon.

MATT: "Please wait here, I'll be right back. I'm going to go check." He closes the gate behind him, locks it, leaves you there, and the two other guards keep their crossbows at the ready, but not aimed. Just careful and ready to go.

TRAVIS: We've met with her already?

MARISHA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: How did it go?

LIAM: Very well.

MARISHA: She's super hot.

LIAM: True.

MATT: A few moments pass, and the front doors to the estate open once more. The guard returns, approaches, unlocks the gate, opens it, "Very well, you may enter. Bring your--" He opens the other side of the gate, but it looks like it's not quite wide enough to get the full cart into it. "You'll have to leave your cart here."

MARISHA: No, that's not doable. Do you have a wider gate around back or something like that?

MATT: "We do not. We'll watch it, don't worry. We'll keep an eye on it. It's not going anywhere."

MARISHA: You personally?

MATT: "Yes! It's my job. I'm stationed literally right here."

TRAVIS: I hope you have some extra hands. We're going to be picking up very heavy equipment and lugging it all the way from the house back to the gate if we can't bring the cart in. I don't mind, it's just--

MATT: "All right, we can muster a few additional hands."

TRAVIS: (coughs)

MATT: "I'll go ahead and put in the request."

LIAM: I know this cart like the back of my hand, and if one inch of it is touched, I will know.

MATT: "Do not worry."

TRAVIS: I would tell this cart that we'll be right back. Stay put, cart.

SAM: (cooing)

MARISHA: He's very personal with the cart.

MATT: He gives an awkward stare, "Very well. The mistress is waiting for you." He steps inside. The guards flank behind as the rest of you-- Nott, Yasha, and Jester are staying within the cart. The rest of you make your way through the courtyard into the main chamber, into the familiar interior. Noticing this for the first time, this beautiful estate looks like it was built from imported wood, a dark, red-brown, maroon wood color. You can see elements of gold leafing in some of the designs have been carved at the edges where different large wall areas come together, and there's a slight pillar that separates it from panel to panel. The closer you get to it, you also see that they've been weathered over time. Some of the wood is starting to warp a bit, and upon closer inspection, upkeep is better seen at a distance. You enter the interior of the warm foyer, you can see the staircase that ascends upward. You can see the portraits of figures that seem to be members of this same family. It is both beautiful and imposing to enter this chamber. The energy here seems very tense. While you've only seen a handful of guards, you feel like there are more eyes on you than meets the eye. A moment later, stepping down the staircase, you hear the footsteps of Ophelia Mardoon. You see a voluptuous tiefling woman with dark, ash-gray skin, vibrant yellow eyes, pupil-less; sharpened fangs that curl down from the top of her teeth, slicked back long black hair that seems to almost meet the back of her ankles. Her horns curve backward and go straight up towards the rear of her head. Her coat, this time not of the same colonial garb you had seen before, but appears to be wearing a long, deep maroon robe that drags down the steps behind her. It's tight across in the front. She's in more of a leisurely appearance, but she descends, one hand on the front of the robe, the other slightly gliding down the banister, looking over this strange bunch that have entered. Recognizing you two, not recognizing you two, and says so as she begins to descend down the final bit of the staircase. "I see some familiar faces, but, strangely, some I do not. Who are your friends before I come any closer?"

LIAM: Well, as I said on our previous meeting, we have vetted appropriate people for the task at hand, which has been completed. That is all you need to know.

MATT: "Completed, you say? Are you to tell me that these Iron Shepherds have been dealt with?"

LIAM: Everyone other than the common folk that they had taken away have been put to the blade or burnt to cinders.

MATT: "And what proof have you brought me?"

TRAVIS: I open up the Bag of Holding and pull out Lorenzo's glaive.

MATT: "Fetch it for me." One of the guards comes over and puts his hands on the glaive and waits for you to release it. He walks over and hands it to Ophelia. She grasps it and (grunts). It's got some heft to it. She takes it and looks it over, "Very well. You are absolutely certain there are no signs left behind to trace it? No one saw you? No one followed you?"

LIAM: You know the one who wields that weapon?

MATT: "I know of the one that did, yes."

LIAM: This one broke his jaw almost off of his face, and then his skull was burned to ash. We murdered everyone in that house who was not a farmer. It is empty.

MATT: Make a persuasion check with advantage. She wants to believe you, but is--

LIAM: Natural 20

MATT: Her yellow eyes darken into slits as she inspects you. For that brief, pregnant pause in conversation, you feel this probing stare. You cannot see where the pupils glance, but you feel like you are being looked up and down, and then every aspect of your facial expressions and mannerisms being instantaneously processed. She leans back comfortably in her stance, now previously with an intense force of confrontational energy, she now seems to relax, takes the glaive and hands it off to one of her guards and says, "Please prepare that for mounting within my collection."

MARISHA: Um. If you don't mind, it would actually be greatly appreciated to us if we kept that for the fallen member of our party.

MATT: "Right. Very well. Leave it with them please." The guard that was taking it off turns around and brings it back and hands it to you.

MARISHA: That's very kind of you.

MATT: "Consider it a favor. Remember it, please. Very well. I am indeed impressed and intrigued. Zemas!" she shouts off, down one of the hallways, and you see a servant rush around the corner, "Yes?" "Prepare two carriages and a package for entry to the Empire. We shall be gone for a couple of weeks to secure business with a contact of mine. Notify Anselm of my absence, please. We leave at dusk." "Of course, my lady," and he rushes off. "Are you ready to leave at dusk?"

MARISHA: You want us to go with you?

MATT: "I was under the impression, based on my contacts with The Gentleman, that we were to return together."

MARISHA: That's right, we were supposed to escort her back. Yep.

LIAM: We are amenable.

MATT: "Very well."

LIAM: That is just fine. There are more of us waiting a ways away.

MATT: "How many? I've only called two carriages: one for myself and one for you. Do you require more?"

LIAM: We have three more, *drei*.

MATT: "So a third carriage? It becomes a bit conspicuous in travel."

LIAM: Well, we have come with our own means of transportation. We can travel with you.

MATT: "Very well. Two carriages, same as said before. I will prepare, collect my things. I suggest you do the same. We leave soon. I am excited to travel alongside you." She smiles, turns, and begins to ascend the steps.

TRAVIS: What in the hot fuck is going on with her?

MARISHA: I think hot fuck is actually very appropriate on a few levels.

TRAVIS: Yeah, okay.

MARISHA: I don't know.

LIAM: (clears throat) You could keep some of those puns in your head, you know.

MARISHA: Why does she want to leave? This can't be good, right?

TRAVIS: We were supposed to escort her back. I'm sure she has more business with The Gentleman, no?

LIAM: Well, the job is the job. We will be watching our own backs regardless, but the job is the job.

TRAVIS: We were going to stop on the way back, though, weren't we?

LIAM: That's not too much to ask.

TRAVIS: No, it's not.

MARISHA: It's along the way.

TALIESIN: This is the job. This is what brought you up here? Interesting.

MARISHA: It's not that this was really the job, it was more like there were two jobs. You had to accept both as opposed to one or the other, and the one was doable and we did it, and the other one--

TRAVIS: Bit off more than we could chew by us saying yes to both.

LIAM: Boy, I wonder how long before Ophelia's ready to go.

MARISHA: Well, she said the morning.

TRAVIS: Dusk.

MATT: Which, right now, based on how early in the afternoon it is, gives you roughly about two and a half, three hours before dusk hits.

TRAVIS: Maybe we'll wait for her outside the gates? With our cart.

MATT: Is there anything you guys wish to do or prepare while you're waiting for her to join you outside of the estate?

SAM: Us?

MATT: Anybody.

LIAM: This is the sticks, right?

MATT: Comparably. This is the northern side of the Clover Plaza, a little bit to the northwest. Imagine this is like the sparse, gated community of the lawless city. The northern side of the street is where most of the houses live, the various feuding factions. It's where the money goes. Right around the road, especially south of it and east of it, is where you start getting into the slums and the folks that exist here because they have no other choice.

TRAVIS: The guards, or the people that she has working for her, are they wearing any sort of face protection, head protection, or is it open?

MATT: The guards that are inside the house are not wearing face protection. They're wearing hide armor comprised of multiple thick strips of cured hide dyed to a dark maroon color. There is definitely a color scheme going on here in the interior and Ophelia's preferred means of wear. The ones outside do have a very simple leather cap with heavy straps, like a Roman-type style, that descend past the sides of the chin, but that's about it.

TRAVIS: Can I ask, in your previous engagements with her, how far are we trusting her?

LIAM and MARISHA: Eh.

TRAVIS: No, superficial, yeah?

MARISHA: Not at all, yeah.

LIAM: I think that everyone in this town is dangerous, so eyes wide open.

MARISHA: Yeah, you guys probably didn't see a lot, considering you were in cages when you came through, but this is a shitty shit-hole. Like a really shitty shit-hole.

TALIESIN: I do live here.

MARISHA: You live in a very nice garden an hour north of here. The city is garbage.

LIAM: Do you spend time in the-- no, you have been alone--

MARISHA: You haven't left in 18 years!

TALIESIN: Well, I've left. I just haven't left in a while. I've got to come to town sometimes. Get things, get supplies.

LIAM: It still stands: it's pretty shitty.

TRAVIS: Yeah, and good things come from shit, right? Like flowers?

TALIESIN: I'm going to have to make a little confession. I really haven't been many other places, so I suppose I really don't actually have a great basis of comparison.

TRAVIS: You didn't travel much?

TALIESIN: No-- oh yeah, I haven't traveled much at all.

LIAM: He's been living in a cemetery--

TRAVIS: Living?

LIAM: Exclusively for a number of years.

MARISHA: It is very beautiful.

TALIESIN: Thank you.

LIAM: Still a cemetery, though.

TRAVIS: We asked this, I'm sure. You're-- (whispering) He's alive, right?

MARISHA: He is. We asked the same question.

TALIESIN: Very much so.

TRAVIS: (strained) Cool, yep.

MARISHA: Yeah, the smell comes with it. It's got a little must? Yeah.

TRAVIS: Musty as shit? Yeah, okay.

LIAM: It's strong at first, but--

TRAVIS: Like sandalwood, kind of?

LIAM: Yes, but you get used to it and it mellows the longer you're around him.

MARISHA: When you two mix together, it has this meatloaf smell.

LIAM: It has not been that long since I took a shower. I don't know why this running gag is continuing.

MATT: As this is happening, you guys are talking and spending time within the cart.

LAURA: We're doing each other's hair, and I'm using my Mending cantrip to fix up Yasha's clothes.

MATT: Which is helping tremendously in the process.

SAM: But she's still lying unconscious?

MATT: She's still unconscious. The enchantment does last for a protracted period of time. You do begin to hear a few pairs of horse hooves coming up louder, behind where the cart is currently set.

LAURA: Can they see the cart?

SAM: I think they can see the cart. They just can't see us in it.

LAURA: Can they hear us?

MATT: You guys can see outside of it because there is no tarp covering the space.

LAURA: Do they look like they can hear us?

MATT: You turn around and look. You don't know if they can hear you or not, but you see two rather extravagant-looking carriages making their way towards you. You can see this dark wood with gold detailing on the outsides. Each has a curtained window on the right and the left, sets of large, spoked wheels on each side, and each one has two horses affixed to the front. There is a driver at the front of each one.

LAURA: Nott, moon them. Moon them right now.

SAM: Yes. I will moon them.

MATT: There is no reaction, but you are, indeed, mooning them.

LAURA: (laughs loudly) I mean, we laugh very quietly, just in case.

MATT: Make a stealth check.

LAURA: Oh no, I rolled really bad on my stealth check. Eight.

MATT: This one older fellow, his nose has grown over time to the point where it's overpowering the front of his face, and he's got this rough, white hair across his chin where he hasn't shaved in a bit, but he's dressed raggedly, though nice? If you imagine one of the ghosts in Haunted Mansion before it died, it's how he's dressed, and as it (horse clopping), he hears you laughing and he looks, "Hello?"

TRAVIS: Yasha wakes up: (startles)

MATT: He steps down from it-- (laughter). As you guys are stepping outside, you hear this as well, and you see the two carriages brought up on the sides of the estate. Shortly thereafter, Ophelia comes behind you, through the door, in the long colonial coat that you had first met her in. Behind her, you see two other guards carrying a number of packed handbags. She points, "All right, please place them-- the front one is mine-- within there." They start loading the bags up into the carriage, up on top of it. One of the guys are lifting the other up and they are passing the bags along as he's putting it up and they're strapping it down with rope across the top of it for travel until, eventually, she is escorted outside of the grounds. She looks to you all outside of the cart-- those that she can see, and she goes, "Should anyone ask along our journeys, I am Lady Quinn Denzala of Nogvurot going to see my ailing mother in Deastok. You are my personal guard. If you mess that up-- well, you may have more blood on your hands, so it would behoove you to pay attention. Hmm?"

TRAVIS: Of course.

LIAM: Of course, Quinn.

MATT: "Very good. Now, let us be off in comfort." She steps up into the carriage and one of the guards helps her. She closes the door behind her. The other carriage doors open and are left open for whoever would like to travel along with them.

SAM: Are you guys going to go with her?

LIAM: We need our cart to be driven--

TALIESIN: I can drive that.

LAURA: Yeah!

LIAM: In the two carriages?

MATT: There's one carriage that's her's, and another carriage--

LIAM: Just hers?

MATT: She does not want to travel with anybody. At least, not at the moment.

LIAM: I will enter the second carriage, if they are looking for people.

MATT: All right, that's Caleb.

MARISHA: How many people?

MATT: Currently, just one--

MARISHA: That are sitting with her?

MATT: Oh, with her?

MARISHA: How many that she wants to sit with her--?

SAM and LAURA: She doesn't want anyone.

MATT: She has her own carriage.

LIAM: I think perhaps we are the intermediaries here. Why don't you ride with me?

MARISHA: Okay.

LAURA: There's still a horse that has to be ridden.

SAM: We can tie it to the other ones.

LAURA: Okay.

TALIESIN: I'll explain what's happening to the horses so that they move appropriately.

LAURA: You can speak to the horses?

MATT: As you guys are hitching the horses to the other horses, Ophelia leans out of a window and goes: "This is intended to be nothing but a visitation travel, there is no reason to have additional beasts. Do you care for your beasts? Are they sentimental to you?"

LIAM: No, not at all. Cut them loose.

MATT: "Cut them loose, and whatever you lose, I will happily repurchase for you when we arrive in Zadash."

MARISHA: It's not that we don't care for these animals, it's just that we cared for Water Closet, and Loo, and John way more.

LIAM: She's missing a lot of context on that sentence.

MARISHA: I just wanted you to know.

MATT: "I appreciate your clarification."

MARISHA: But yeah, fuck these horses.

MATT: "Indeed." Closes the curtains on her window.

TALIESIN: I explain this to the horses, I let them know what's going on; telling the two that they're ready to go about their business.

SAM: Who's going to pull our carriage?

MATT: You still have two horses on your cart, but there are the two being ridden separately. Those horses begin to wander off, finding their way through the Savalirwood southward.

SAM: I named them and everything.

LAURA: They're just going to be eaten, though! They're just horses.

SAM: I named all of the horses while you guys were in there! I named them Waterloo, Fernando, Mamma Mia, and Dancing Queen.

(laughter)

MATT: Well, say goodbye to the two of your choosing, Nott.

TRAVIS: Yeah, which ones?

MARISHA: Definitely Mamma Mia--

LIAM: Got to keep Mamma Mia.

MARISHA, TALIESIN, and LAURA: No.

SAM: I guess Fernando and Waterloo.

LAURA: Mamma Mia and Dancing Queen are staying with us.

MATT: There you go, okay. As they wander off, you hear "Hyah!" (lashing, horse clopping), the carriages begin to pick up speed. Caduceus, you're driving the cart?

TALIESIN: Yeah, give them a little: If you wouldn't mind?

MATT: With that, it picks up as well, and now your train of two carriages and your cart begin to make their way southward, through Shadycreek Run. You guys begin to curve through the Clover Plaza, where you can see the bustle of the city is definitely making its way towards the latter half of the day. The sunset is cresting probably in the next hour or so. Keeping watch, the ones that are looking about would be-- Caduceus, you'd have a good view? You guys have a view throughout the illusion, so you three--

LIAM: Can I interject for a second?

MATT: Sure.

LIAM: Since this is a lot of time that's passing, and it's just Beauregard and I in this carriage, can I, as a ritual spell, cast Detect Magic and check out the cart around us?

MATT: Sure. You finish focusing on the spell and as you release your arcane incantation to sense the area around you, there's nothing about the cart that appears magical. Since you're focusing on that, and you are--

TRAVIS: I guess I'm upfront with Caduceus.

MATT: All right, I would like you four-- or you three, and you to go ahead and roll perception checks, please.

SAM: 14. Jesus.

TRAVIS: 12.

TALIESIN: 24.

LAURA: Aw, 21. But still good.

MATT: The two of you noticing as the cloud covered skies-- the snowfall has lightened, it's not as heavy as it was in the morning, but there is still a faint, soft falling of snowflakes in the air. The now gray and white city with the edges of the roads mucked with dirty snow and mud, being tracked through from all the foot and cart traffic. You do notice off to the sides near one of the inns or taverns that you have not had the opportunity to visit yet, within the Clover Plaza, you see a small gathering or meeting that catches your attention. You glance over and-- you wouldn't have context. Actually, none of you have the context for this. The two of you see a small meeting, between two really burly-looking figures in armor. A similar style-- or at least a haphazard patchwork-style of armor and adornments as some of the others that patrol the streets, keeping an eye out. Look like thugs a bit. You see two of them meeting with two figures that are in heavy cloak and hood. Because of your perceptive abilities, you notice that they are of a similar skin color as Ophelia. Their features are very fine, and their lithe bodies vanish within the heavy cloaks that guide them. You do see bits of armor protruding off the side of one that appear to be dark and insect-like.

LAURA: Does it look like the guy that we met down in the sewers?

MATT: It does. As you're watching out you see them discussing-- there is a brief transaction in the shadows of this alleyway and a handshake from the two cloaked figures and these two others. As you ride by and continue southward.

LAURA: Shady deals happening over there.

TALIESIN: Oh, I've never seen one before. Are they buying--

LAURA: I don't know. They're probably selling drugs to each other.

TALIESIN: Oh, that's cool. That's super cool.

LAURA: Wait a minute-- (gasps) Wait a minute! Those were those guys!

TALIESIN: Which guys?

LAURA: The guys that were-- (gasps) Nott!

SAM: What?!

LAURA: I just saw one of those guys that had the thing!

TRAVIS: The dodecahedron.

SAM: You saw a drow creature from Xhorhas? You saw a crick?

LAURA: Don't say that! That's really rude. I saw them. They were over there, they had cloaks on and I saw them! What if they can sense us and they know that we have the thing that they're looking for? I keep looking at them to see if they notice us.

MATT: You pay very close attention as you pass through the main thoroughfare of the Clover Plaza. They don't seem to notice or pay any mind to your presence and eventually they are out of sight, and you have no means of keeping tabs on them. As you now head towards the southern side of the Clover Street, heading towards the outskirts of Shadycreek Run. Eventually out of the city entirely. As the buildings begin to give way to hovels and huts, and tents, and shacks, you begin to see really where the bulk of those who have escaped or not allowed entry into the Empire now reside. You see mud-covered folks that are bundled up for body heat in this cold weather. Many that are outstretching hands in your direction for handouts, and others that get too close to the outside of Ophelia's carriage. The cart-driver grabs a switch off the side and whacks one of them on the hand and he recoils from it and darts off, and a few others hiss and run off with him. Eventually, that gives way to the path that leads to the Quannah Breach. Familiar for those of you who had traveled here previously, you can see the Dunrock Mountains ahead: the large, spiky crags that make up that mark this mountain range that is the divide between the northern Grey Wastes and the descent into the Dwendalian Empire. The Greying Wildlands that you reside in begin to give way as you see the gate of the Uttolot Family's exit from the region. As you approach, similar figures that originally greeted you at dusk when you had arrived here seem to be stationed there. As they approach the carriage, before they can even raise a word, Ophelia leans one arm out the side and throws a small coin purse in their direction. One of them catches it, opens it real fast, and gives a motion. The two gates open before the carriage. There you get to see the familiar sharpened wooden pikes that are adorned with skulls and pieces of whatever other warnings they could amass for anybody who attempted to pass without paying the toll. Passing beyond those gates, you curve around the corner and now you're between the sheared cliffs of the Quannah Breach, where it looks like this mountain was pulled apart, leaving behind this strange, snaking maze of open pathway. Smooth on the inside of these otherwise rough mountains, like wind has, over time, eroded and driven smooth the interior through here. You can hear the faint winds blowing through, occasionally bursting with loud whistles and this droning moan sound that seems to be created by the wind pushing against these weirdly carved pathways through. These drivers have done this many times and very deftly maneuver through. When it does fork off in different directions, they knowingly take the path that you assume will bring you to the end of this journey. After a bit of time passing through this strange ravine, it opens up once more to a very large gate. You can see crownsguard there, expecting you as you pass through. The crownsguard begin to approach. The carriages stop, and Ophelia steps out. As she does so, another one of the carriage drivers, the one that's driving your carriage, Beau and Caleb, steps off to join her with a small scroll case. She steps up to the captain of this watch. From a distance, they begin to have a conversation. You can't hear it. It's hushed voices, or at least not loud enough to reach your distance.

MARISHA: I wish you could still read lips.

LAURA: I know, that's what I was thinking: I can't read lips!

MATT: Nah, that's the old campaign.

SAM: I could sneak up and--

TRAVIS: Caleb, what about your cat?

LIAM: Are you whispering to me through the doorway or--

TRAVIS: No, I'm leaning over the carriage like: Hey what about your *gato*?

LIAM: *Ja* (dying sound)

LAURA: Hey, look what I can do.

SAM: What?

LAURA: I am going to use-- what is the thing? The Cloak of Shadows? I'm going to use Cloak of Shadows on myself.

MATT: All right. It gives you about 12 seconds of invisibility.

LAURA: Wait, that's it? Motherfucker, I thought it gave me a lot more than that.

MATT: It's until the end of your next turn.

LAURA: Ah shit, it's in-battle. Hold on, look what I can do!

SAM: Where'd you go? Oh my god! Oh hi.

MATT: Best use of Channel Divinity in D&D history right there, ladies and gentlemen.

LAURA: I thought it lasted longer than that.

SAM: It was really cool, though.

LAURA: Did you see that I went invisible?

SAM: You were gone! It was crazy.

LAURA: I've been thinking about that for a while.

SAM: Well, next time you use it maybe it will have a purpose.

(laughter)

TRAVIS: Status quo.

MARISHA: Yeah, I was going to say: I do not miss Sam Riegel giving me shit about my spell usage.

MATT: As this is happening, and you're watching carefully across the way, the scroll case is opened and a series of papers are handed to the crownsguard there. Then a handful of coin are passed over by Ophelia to the captain. Reads over the papers, hands them back, gives a hand motion to a group of about six or seven crownsguard at the gate. They begin to open it, and entry is given to the Empire. In the few days you've been gone, the carriages pick up speed once more and you re-enter the Dwendalian Empire, heading towards the northern side of the Marrow Valley. Welcome back.

TRAVIS: Holy shit.

LIAM: Excuse me. Once we're past the border, and time has passed, and the two empire kids are sitting alone in this carriage. Caleb, staring out the window not even looking at Beauregard: Beauregard?

MARISHA: Mm-hmm?

LIAM: Who are you? You know an awful lot about me now. You are not some (sigh) youth throwing themselves on drink, as you tried to claim when we first met. You are clearly tied to something greater than that. You are not some fuck-up. Who are you?

MARISHA: It's funny. I thought you were going to say something like, "Man, the Empire's sure fucked up." I was going to be like: Right? I was just thinking the same thing. It's just like what Jester said: we can read each other's thoughts.

LIAM: That's a separate issue. We're very different, but not completely. I would feel a little safer if I knew a little more about you.

MARISHA: Well, you know I'm a monk of the Cobalt Soul. I actually dumped a lot of this on Nott. She asked. We were a little tipsy.

LIAM: Okay.

MARISHA: I was feeling vulnerable in the moment. It doesn't happen often. She caught me in a perfect window.

LIAM: Her or you?

MARISHA: Nott did. Wait-- both? Nevermind.

LIAM: Right.

MARISHA: I never intended to be a monk of the Cobalt Soul. My father sent me away to the monastery when I wasn't what he wanted me to be. And I was kind of a dick. So.

LIAM: Why are you out here in the wastelands?

MARISHA: I ran away from the Cobalt Soul and they gave me a raise in rank because of it. That was kind of cool. Really just further instilled my rebellion, to be totally honest.

LIAM: Now you what? You want to follow the orders of the Cobalt Soul? You want to do whatever they ask you to do? Or something you want to do? Why are you running around with criminals? And me?

MARISHA: My whole life was dictated by establishment that I didn't have a lot of control over. The Cobalt Soul has this underlying faction that helps uproot corrupt establishment. I know, I scoffed at the idea of being a part of a system that's supposed to take down systems. It doesn't really make sense, but you know. Maybe you, if anyone, can understand the idea of fighting fire with fire. That's why I'm doing this.

LIAM: This is all orders you are following?

MARISHA: No. They just want information. I'm out in the world at the ground level. People like us tend to have our fingers on the pulse of what's being said around the city sometimes. It's not necessarily something that a monk in full accolades can always accomplish.

LIAM: Okay. So a little bit of official business. A little bit of your own personal axe to grind.

MARISHA: Yeah.

LIAM: (repeating) *Ja. Danke.*

MARISHA: Does that make you uncomfortable?

LIAM: No.

MARISHA: Cool.

LIAM: (exaggerated) Cool.

MARISHA: Ew. Don't do that.

(laughter)

MATT: Continuing southward through the night. Eventually, the carriages pull off to the side for the evening.

LAURA: Me and Nott are having a dance party in ours.

MATT: (laughs) That no one can see.

LIAM: (high pitched) I'm alive, I'm happy!

MATT: Ophelia doesn't leave her carriage, but eventually the carts and the two carriages are circled around a campfire. The drivers begin to cook their own meal and you are allowed to use the space to make what you wish.

MARISHA: Have we made it outside the city?

MATT: You guys are far beyond the city, you're beyond the Quannah Breach. You haven't reached the main road yet. You are just south of the breach, maybe by four hours or so. You're still north, north side if you want to--

MARISHA: So we're still north of the Crispvale Thicket.

MATT: Yes, far north. A few days north of that. Like three days north.

TALIESIN: I'll cook up what's there and we'll have a meal.

MATT: All right. For the purpose of expediency, you have another day and a half, two days worth of travel. The snowfall hasn't come in flurries, thankfully. It's just been a gentle, continuous snowfall. Chilled as it is, the blankets have come in handy for those riding in the cart as the carriages themselves help insulate somewhat from the temperature. There comes a point where all of you who were present: Beauregard, Caleb, Nott. Where your hair begins to stand on your skin, and this deep, lead-like sinking sensation clenches the bottom of your stomach. As you've, a short time ago, met up with the Glory Run Road heading southward. You begin to come upon two familiar-looking mounds, hills that flank the sides of the road.

SAM: I will message Caleb with my little wire and say: Do you think we should stop? You can reply to this message.

LIAM: Yes. I pull out my own wire and I aim towards Ophelia and say: Miss Denzala, we require a few moments on the side of the road here.

MATT: She responds, "A quick pit stop, if that is what you require?"

LIAM: *Ja,* ten, 20 minutes. Nothing more.

MATT: "Very well." The carriage at the front comes to a slow stop. The second carriage comes to a stop. As you all begin to step out of your spaces, the soft white hills and white fields and small elements of the slushy road immediately catch your vision. There, towards the southern side of the eastern hill, you see the single wooden cross embedded in the somewhat hard, cold earth. There, not yet removed from the cross, whether it be by luck or superstition, there is the white, snow-dappled, multicolored coat of Mollymauk Tealeaf.

MARISHA: I grab Jester by the hand and walk her over.

LAURA: I've never actually been to a grave before.

MARISHA: Really?

LAURA: Not of someone I knew.

MARISHA: Right. That makes sense.

LAURA: I get down on my knees. I think he's still here with us.

MARISHA: I think so, too.

LAURA: Thank you, Molly.

MARISHA: You know, I grabbed his stupid cards.

LAURA: I love those cards.

MARISHA: You want to draw one?

LAURA: Yeah.

LIAM: Caleb scoops Nott up out of the cart that she's in, and we watch from a distance.

LAURA: What did I pull?

MATT: What did she pull?

TALIESIN: Oh god, I got to think about this. I think you pulled the moon again.

LAURA: I pulled this the first time I met him.

MARISHA: Old faithful.

LAURA: Well, this is his card. I put it next to the little stick.

MARISHA: (sighs)

TRAVIS: I'll hop off the carriage and walk over. Staring at the coat, I'll summon the new sword.

MATT: You watch as the blade emerges. The golden sheen of the Summer's Dance is crooked towards the tip, the previously smooth curvature of it seeming to have blended with the design of the falchion. It's a strange exaggerated blend of the two.

TRAVIS: In the way that I was taught by Vandran, I extend the sword to my side, bring it up in a salute, swing it back down. I've met a lot of people, but I don't think I'll ever meet another character as unique as you, Molly.

LIAM: What time of day is it?

MATT: It's about midday. As you look around at the nearby clouds, you glance back towards the cart, and you see, stepping out of the cloak of illusion, the leathered, conscious figure of Yasha, having shaken herself from the illusory binds. Groggy and confused, she steps towards the rest of you. "What's going on?"

LAURA: I'm sorry, Yasha.

TRAVIS: While they were coming to rescue us--

SAM: We lost him.

LIAM: He tried to get to your side. He tried very hard.

MATT: She takes a few more steps. She seems to have tuned the rest of you out and is focused on the marker. "It happened again." She walks towards the grave, the crunching of her boots through the condensed snowfall, until eventually she comes to rest at the very point of where he was interred. Falls to her knees, her shoulders slumped forward, her hair, dark to white tumbling past the front of her torso. Turned away from you all. Just quiet.

LAURA: I put my hand on her shoulder.

MARISHA: I put my hand on the other one.

MATT: Both of you feel her shoulders quaking. You can't tell if it's tears, anger, whatever it is, it's emotion. You hear a growl. The growl gets louder and louder as she begins to stand up. All of you hear this echoing scream from the depths of Yasha's soul-- this mournful, baleful cry of anger and anguish-- shatter the still, cold air of this midday sky. The blackened, skeletal wings of her fallen aasimar form force both of your hands to recoil. She looks up to the sky. In the distance, you see two or three flashes of blue lightning from a coalescing storm far to the east. Her head lowers, without meeting any of your gaze. She puts her hand forward on the top of the marker, steps around it, and begins walking towards the storm.

LAURA and TRAVIS: Yasha--

MATT: She puts her hand up. "I'll find you when I'm ready." The wings flicker out.

LIAM: Knowing how young Nott is, I hold her closer and rest her head on my shoulder and walk away from this very painful thing to look at.

TALIESIN: May I? I'm going to walk up. Move a little bit of the snow and dig my hand as deep into the ground as I can, and attempt to do the full casting of Decompose and see what I get.

LAURA: Are you going to make Molly tea?

MARISHA: (whispering) What's he doing?

MATT: You finish focusing on the cantrip. It feels like it sufficiently took root, although you do not see any difference, as it is a bit beneath the dirt.

TALIESIN: Something will be here.

MARISHA: What did you just do?

TALIESIN: I made the earth remember him. Something will be here. I get back on the cart and leave them.

TRAVIS: I've said it before, but I'm sorry we weren't here. To help. We haven't known each other that long, but you've shown us incredible kindness and care, and I'm very grateful for that. I will return the favor, if it's ever needed.

MARISHA: After a while, you lose track of favors. It's okay.

TRAVIS: I've never had many favors done my way.

MARISHA: It wasn't a favor, though. You guys are the only friends I've ever had. Most people in my life just leave. Anyone I'm not driving away. I guess I should probably try and start keeping people around at this point.

LAURA: I need to get myself some diamonds.

MARISHA: That is an incredibly random thought.

LAURA: No, it's so that this doesn't happen again.

SAM: I think he would have been happy that you got to say goodbye. But we should keep going.

LAURA: (softly) Yeah.

LIAM: Come, everyone. Molly wanted us to keep living.

MARISHA: And make things better.

LIAM: Back in the carts.

MATT: As you all turn around and begin making your way, crunching through the snow, outside of her carriage you see Ophelia Mardoon, arms crossed, leaning against the outside of it. As you approach, she has a curious tilt to her head, and she goes, "I assume this is where you lost someone? Unfortunate."

LIAM: There is always a cost.

MATT: "Don't I know it. Well, may whoever they are, may their soul find peace. To whatever that means to them." She turns around and gets back up into the carriage. With that, you all assemble back onto your respective carts and places and "Hyah!" The carts begin to pick up pace once more, and silently, you all glance over your shoulder, unable to look away, until eventually the hills break the horizon, and you're unable to see the last standing coat and grave site of Mollymauk. Now heading southward for a few more days, trekking down, you find your way towards the Crispvale Thicket on the Glory Run Road. There is the crossroads which turn westward, and then curving outside of the Crispvale Thicket, towards Hupperdook and the Silberquel Ridge. Eventually, after a couple more days, you pass by and you can see in the distance, as the night gets dark, the glowing lights and the fireworks of Hupperdook's evening celebrations. Memories calling back to that wonderfully colored person. All the joy they brought. The flowers in their hair and horns. Eventually heading back towards the crossroads that leads towards Felderwin and Berleben. Following that path, about eight days of travel lead you finally to the visual sight of the central metropolis of Zadash ahead of you. For whatever a home could be for this motley family, this is it, and you've made it. By the time you arrive after an evening's camp, you hit the northern gates outside of Zadash by about one o'clock in the afternoon, it would be. Ophelia presents her paperwork to the crownsguard that guard the exterior gate. Without issue, you're let in and back to the familiar cobblestone streets of the district. You can see the Tri-Spires towering over the exterior walls that mark that district. Memories of what you've done here and times that you've first met and made whatever small impact and strange experiences this city had before, you've returned. So, Mighty Nein, what do you wish to do?

TRAVIS: Out of game, how long have we been gone? When did we leave Zadash? We've been gone for--

MARISHA: At least three weeks, right?

TRAVIS: Feels like a year.

LIAM: I don't know, but Caleb would know it exactly.

MATT: Caleb would know, and I'm sure CritRoleStats, too, would know. I will guesstimate, since the last time I checked in with them on this and the events you guys have gone through, you're three and a half weeks in. You're pushing somewhere, I'm guessing after all that eight days of travel coming down here-- a little bit less than that, probably. You guys were moving slow because you're moving carts, not on horseback. You're getting pretty close to the 30-day mark.

LIAM: Also, since we spent so much time in those carriages, I would have spent a full day with my lucky rock that I found, and those ideas I had have come to fruition. I have set it just so.

MATT: All right.

TRAVIS: You got a lucky rock?

SAM: Yep. That's what this game is about now, Travis.

LIAM: I have Luck again. I got a new feat.

TRAVIS: Oh!

LIAM: Cheers.

TRAVIS: Hey, man. Old trick's the best trick.

MATT: No.

LIAM: Never again.

MATT: So what do you wish to do? You've returned to--

SAM: We have to bring Ophelia to The Gentleman, right?

LIAM: Yeah, but hold on. Also rewind. Seven or eight days on the road, how much money do we all have?

SAM: Oh, I did the math between all the platinum and gold that we found, we should each get 163 gold pieces.

LIAM: 163?

MARISHA: Did you break down the platinum?

SAM: Yes.

TRAVIS: 101 platinum, 131 gold.

LIAM: Not as much as I wanted.

LAURA: Wait a minute. How much gold do I--

SAM: Including Yasha, who I assume took her share.

LIAM: Of course she did.

TRAVIS: Yes. We threw it and it landed in her pocket when she ghosted out.

TALIESIN: Am I getting in this as well?

SAM: You're part of this as well.

TALIESIN: Wow! That's awfully nice.

TRAVIS: We're going to have an introductory period. You stay for two weeks and then we give you your money.

TALIESIN: That seems very prudent.

LAURA: Where do I add money?

MATT: There's a currency tab.

LIAM: Actions. Spell. Equipment and then touch on the icons of the coins in D&D Beyond.

LAURA: Wait a minute, but didn't you guys steal some money from me?

SAM: We took a bunch of your gold.

MARISHA: We took about 70 gold.

LIAM: No, of course not.

SAM: We took 70 gold.

LAURA: I got a lot of tweets about it.

TALIESIN: Thanks, guys.

SAM: We took some of Molly's gold.

LIAM: The internet's full of troublemakers.

TALIESIN: Thanks, guys. That's the last time we let you be in on our secrets. So it's how much gold, how much platinum?

SAM: 163 gold. I just broke it down into gold.

LIAM: But it's all platinum. Right?

SAM: Who cares?

LIAM: He might.

SAM: Matt, did we find a bank to break change on the way?

MATT: I can say, if you'd like to, there are ways to transition the money. For ease, you can say gold piece value for keeping tabs on it, but you can say that a portion of it is platinum for ease of travel. Though you have a bag of holding; it's not a huge issue.

SAM: Okay.

MATT: Bag of holding is one of those items where eventually, when you reach a certain level, you're like, "You know what? Let's not worry about all that copper and silver and gold piece weight with you."

LIAM: We all have roughly 30-something platinum.

TRAVIS: Dope.

MATT: Be glad you rolled at least a 15 on that investigation check, or you never would have found a bag of holding.

TRAVIS: Holy Jesus.

LAURA: Oh my god.

LIAM: Detective!

MARISHA: I rolled like crap, considering.

MATT: I know I don't show the notes there regularly, but that is the 15 plus investigation.

TRAVIS: Yep. Oh my god.

LIAM: We don't doubt you, Matt. We don't doubt you. I know you don't sleep. I know you stare at a computer monitor and think up numbers for us non-stop.

MATT: I should be better about being a human being.

LIAM: (robotic voice) It's all good.

MATT: The carriages make their way, beelining, as if they know where to go, towards The Evening Nip.

SAM: Do we remember the code to get in? What is it? You say, like, "I need a drink."

LIAM: "These pretzels are making me thirsty."

SAM: Yeah. What is it? "I am here to help."

MARISHA: It's like, "I need to speak to The Gentleman?"

LAURA: "I want some milk," or something.

LIAM: It's a phrase.

MARISHA: I have it written down somewhere.

SAM: Maybe Ophelia knows.

MARISHA: I'm sure we're fine.

SAM: Ophelia, do you know the secret code?

LIAM: "I'd like to offer many gifts."

MATT: That is indeed it.

LIAM: Bitches.

MATT: The carriages eventually find their way, snaking through the sometimes narrow streets of Zadash, until eventually find your way to the outskirts of The Evening Nip. The carriages stop. I imagine the carts would come to a stop as well, those who are driving them. Ophelia steps out and her drivers hold view on this. Ophelia heads towards and waits at the doorway to The Evening Nip. One of her drivers comes up behind her with the bags that she had packaged in the carriage, and as you guys step off of them, one of the carriages is then brought around the back to The Evening Nip. She has her arms crossed. "Well, are you all coming?"

MARISHA: Yeah.

LIAM: Yeah, of course.

MATT: "Good. Follow me." She steps inside. As you all step into the dark interior of the tavern, the first thing you see amongst the various empty tables and booths in this small, divey tavern. The familiar smell of stained wood and strong liquors spilled on floors that have long warped and been stained with all sorts of drinks and chemicals. You see the gruff, dwarven bartender, Clive, look back at you. His chin chewing something on the inside of his mouth. "Ah, I was given word you might show up. Most likely not, mind you, but word was given. Go ahead."

LAURA: I have many gifts.

MATT: "Right, right. No, I've seen you before."

LAURA: Yeah, but I do have many gifts, though.

MATT: "All right, well bring them up."

SAM: It worked!

MATT: Ophelia looks like she is trying to recall something. She's like, "It's round that way." She follows you in. It looks like she is trying to recall, like it's been a while since she's been here.

MARISHA: I go: Yeah, it's this way. That's to the bathroom.

MATT: "Right, I know. I remember."

TRAVIS: As were heading down, I'll drop my Mask of Many Faces.

MATT: You find the trap door, open it, and you begin to descend the tight spiral staircase that leads into the under-chambers of The Gentleman's lair. As you reach the base of it, you can hear the sound of a lazy harp playing inside the stone-case chamber. Across the way, you can see the individual playing the harp is Kara, who's leaned against the bar on a stool. Her legs up on the edge of a table and just a little, small compact harp, which she is plucking away at lazily. Looks like she may have been imbibing early this day. The usual suspects fill two of the tables. The same ogre guardian eyeing you all with both familiarity and general mindless suspicion.

TRAVIS: Kutha, how's it been?

MATT: (grunts)

TRAVIS: Yeah, very talkative for him, actually.

MATT: The left table appears to be rather crowded. There is a card game afoot. The Gentleman is amongst this group, most of the general attendees of this area, the Underworks, seem to have been gathered here. There's seven players at the table at this point and the others are just watching from the outskirts and they're in the middle of a rather tense hand. There is quite a pile of coin; a variety of copper, silver, and gold all thrown in, a handful of platinum thrown in the mix. This looks like some sort of crescendo as The Gentleman is there looking at his cards in his hand. His eyes quickly glance up and notice you approach, and he gives an acknowledging nod and he goes right back to his hand. He's focused on the other players at the table. Behind him, you can see looming Sorah, his half-giant guardian, still standing there over him. Her hands crossed and she just watches as you approach, and then looks very carefully over everyone at the table to make sure everyone's hands are visible. At this point, everyone's hands are called and one by one each hand hits the table and then, at once, you see this raucous cry and scream of excitement and boos all at once and The Gentleman throws his cards down, shaking his head as he accepts defeat, and one of his handyman manages to scrape the coins off the table. He goes and reaches over to a bowl on the table behind him and pulls what looks to be a fresh strawberry that's been cleaned perfectly, none of the green remaining at the top, pops it into his mouth, chews for a second, and looks over to the rest of you. As he glances at the direction and points a finger, everyone looks over their shoulder and notices your approach and they begin to pick up their cards and it seems like the gaming session is done with your arrival. The Gentleman looks over and goes, "My, my, my. (laughs) I would have easily read my opponents had my eyes not been so blinded by beauty." As he looks towards Ophelia, he sits up and she puts her hand out and he takes the hand and kisses it, and then in one rapid movement grabs her arm, stands up, and sweeps her around in his arm and brings her in for this really passionate kiss. There's a moment where they're both just locked in before he goes (loud grunt) and pulls away and grasps his lip, and you can see there's blood now curling down. She sits there and licks the blood and goes, "It has been awhile, my azure lover. However, business before pleasure." He wipes his lip a bit for a second, "Well, you've upheld your promise and sent, it seems, a successful endeavor, right? I assume since you've returned with her." She goes, "They are a very capable team, indeed. Consider our debt paid," she says to The Gentleman. "Now, I would like to see their debt paid, as well, for they have paid for their service in blood." The Gentleman stands up at his table: "Of course, my dear, of course. I am sorry to hear that." He looks amongst you all and looks over to you and gives a curious look, and keeps glancing about. "Ah. I see what she refers to. My apologies. However, that is the way of the entrepreneurial sellsword, is it not? And--" He seems to be making a calculation in his mind for a moment. "We are on schedule!"

LAURA: Did you get my messages?

MATT: "I did, and thank you very much. Actually, the storehouse is already up and running again, so thank you very much for the notification. That saved us some time, as well."

SAM: That's the tree place, right?

MATT: "That is a way of explaining it, yes."

SAM: Also, Mr. Gentleman, sir, we didn't catch you at a bad time, did we? It seems that you just stepped out of the shower, or something? Should we come back after you've dried yourself off and made yourself presentable?

MATT: You watch as the glimmer of confidence in his eyes sets into this glare for a second, and then he (laughs) "I'll be fine. Well, your contract is fulfilled. Ms. Mardoon and I will take the week to re-establish our trade line, and I think you've earned every copper." He looks over his shoulder and two of his various goons come over with a heavy chest. (strained grunt) onto the table. It hits with a very mighty strike and the whole table shakes for a second. They open it: it is filled with gold and platinum coins.

MARISHA: Pay day!

MATT: Glancing in, it's mostly platinum.

TRAVIS: Got hundreds, y'all!

MATT: He pushes it forward, and it comes to about 600 platinum pieces and 250 gold pieces.

LIAM: 3250 gold, it's platinum plus gold, around 600 platinum pieces times five.

SAM: Times five?

MATT: Times ten.

LIAM: Times ten? Even better.

MATT: The remaining sum for the agreement you had made was 6250 gold pieces for both jobs being completed. He had paid some in advance and given you some funds, but this is the rest of the agreed upon amount.

LIAM: Hundred silver, y'all.

SAM: I think your math is off.

MATT: He then reaches back into a small belt pouch that is carefully hidden on the inside of his belt, counts out a few coins and throws them across the table towards you. It looks to be another 50 or so platinum.

MARISHA: We got a tip?

SAM: What is this, a tip?

MATT: "For your loss and your troubles."

SAM: That is very honorable.

MATT: "I'm nothing if not. So you have a new companion that you've dragged into my sanctum?"

LAURA: He has many gifts to offer.

TALIESIN: I have no idea what's going on right now.

SAM: Mr. Clay, this is "money" and you can use it to by things like goods or services.

TALIESIN: What kind of goods and services?

SAM: Oh, you know, like tailoring services.

LIAM: What are you interested in?

TALIESIN: I know what money is; I'm just having fun with Nott.

LIAM: Well, but still, what are you interested in?

TALIESIN: You know, I've never really thought about it before. Yeah, I can think of about four things I'd like to get. That's nice. Yeah.

LIAM: I'm sure they have a lot of tea blends here in Zadash.

TALIESIN: Well, and I could probably use a new tea set and maybe a new skillet--

LIAM: You had three cups, so you need (counting).

SAM: Yeah, so are the four things to make a set of seven?

TALIESIN: This ought to cover it just fine.

LAURA: You like rings?

TALIESIN: No, I'm okay.

LAURA: Whoa!

MATT: "Well, regardless, you have two choices here: either we kill you or we take a bit of our essence to keep tabs."

LAURA: Sorry about that.

MARISHA: Yeah, we probably should've told you that before we brought you in here.

TRAVIS: They all have a little collection of our blood in vials.

MATT: "It's just a formality. We need to protect our interests as much as yours. I hope you understand, Mr.--? Miss? Whatever you'd like."

TALIESIN: Clay. Mr. Clay.

MATT: "Mr. Clay."

TALIESIN: I'm going to try and get an insight check on this interesting individual. 23.

SAM: Ooh, secrets.

LIAM: (whispering) Secrets.

SAM: Hey, Laura?

LAURA: Hey, yeah, Sam?

SAM: How do you like the new layout of the D&D Beyond app? I don't think you've used it yet.

LAURA: No, this is my first time looking at it, but I'll tell you what, it sure is... great.

SAM: Wow.

LAURA: My brain isn't working. I was trying to think of a word for--

TRAVIS: Boy, is it efficient! Everything I want is now in condensed--

LIAM: Man, your schlocky bit is great and all, but it is really good to have you two at the table again. It'd only be better if Ashley was here, but it is really good to have you two back. Fucking for real. *Ja*, okay, as you were.

TALIESIN: Okay, but I'm going to need something.

MATT: (chuckles) "Curious. Tell me what you need."

TALIESIN: I need you to promise not to do anything untoward with it. Whatever you're going to do and what you need it for, obviously everyone seemed okay with that. I need you to promise that you're not going to cast anything weird or-- you know.

MATT: "You have my word as a gentleman."

TALIESIN: That seems fair.

MATT: "All right. Cree!" From around the corner, finishing a meal, the dark-furred, yellow-eyed tabaxi woman begins to approach, pulling a small satchel, pulling open the flap, and taking out a small blade.

TALIESIN: I can do it. I'm going to get one of my beetles to come out and bite my finger for me.

MATT: "Oh! How strange."

TALIESIN: Thank you.

MATT: She pulls one vial out of her satchel, uncorking it. As she curls a finger upward, the blood seems to lift in a slow arc out of the wound, and drift, dancing through the air, and then into the vial, before it's filled to about halfway. The blood flow staunches, and it completes the vial to about three quarters. She corks it and puts it back into the satchel, closing it. "Thank you very much for your donation."

TALIESIN: You're welcome. I'm going to really quickly cast Eyes of the Grave. Are there any undead within 60 feet?

MATT: Interesting point. No. No undead within 60 feet.

TALIESIN: Thank you.

MATT: You feel a little more comfortable knowing that.

TALIESIN: Just wanted to check.

MATT: Cree turns to you and goes, "I hate to bother, but-- I'm happy to see you return. I see that Lucien is not with you."

SAM: Oh. Yes.

LIAM: That is correct. He had his own business to attend to. We parted ways.

MATT: Make a deception check.

SAM: Oh, boy.

LIAM: Natural 20. Thanks, Matt Colville!

MATT: "All right. Should you cross paths with him again, tell him that Cree would like to see him. It's been so brief since we've been reunited."

LIAM: It didn't end well. It seems doubtful, but *ja*, if we see him again, rest assured.

MATT: "Very well. Anyway, it is good to see all of you. Welcome back. The Gentleman is pleased with your success. Yes." Then turns around and shuffles her way back to where she was sitting.

LAURA: Can I ask a question, Matthew?

MATT: Yes, you may.

LAURA: Do we know what day it is? Is it past Quen'pillar?

MATT: It's probably right on the cusp of Quen'pillar, because that shift happened with the Harvest Close festival, if I recall. I'll double-check, after the episode, to be sure it's the right answer. You're right on the cusp, if not right now entering to that month.

TRAVIS: Could I get The Gentleman's attention and say: This adventure has been thorough. A name came up in our travels, and I was wondering if you may have heard of someone, a Marius LePual.

SAM and LAURA: (whispering furiously) What are you doing!?

LIAM: (pigeon cooing)

SAM: Go on.

MATT: "Ah--" As you're talking to him, his eyes are locked over to Ophelia. "I can't say that rings a bell, but I can certainly ask my contacts, if you're looking for information about this individual. What was his name?"

TRAVIS: Marius LePwel. Pwal. P-U-A-L.

MATT: "I'll look into it. Don't worry."

TRAVIS: Appreciate it.

MATT: "Pleasure is mine, Fjord. Anything else you require? Otherwise, I believe you have some money to spend."

SAM: Oh, yes!

LAURA: So much!

SAM: Thank you!

MARISHA: Is it still an open bar?

MATT: "When is it not? Please, be my guests."

MARISHA: I go to the bar.

MATT: A round of liquor for all you'd like.

TALIESIN: I'll take whatever's not liquor.

TRAVIS: Do you have any milk?

LAURA: They do have milk. I've had it before.

MATT: They do have milk.

TALIESIN: I don't think I've ever had milk.

LAURA: (gasp) Oh, you have to try it. It's so good.

TALIESIN: I'm going to try milk.

MATT: It's not particularly chilled. It's thick, and creamy. It's your choice whether or not it's your preference based on how you lived most of your life.

TALIESIN: This is weird. I'm not sure.

SAM: It's from a cow!

LAURA: Or a goat. It could be from a goat.

SAM: Could be a goat.

LAURA: It could be from a mom.

TALIESIN: That's just weird. It's very weird.

SAM: Maybe just have some tea. They might have tea. Do you have tea?

MATT: Then the barkeep, who's the ragged middle-aged man who's running the bar at the moment. One eye, you don't know if it's swollen shut or if he's missing an eye or he's just wanting to study you very closely with the left one. He leans forward and goes, "You're joking, right?"

SAM: (forced) Ha! Yeah. (forced laughter)

MATT: "It's funny, It's a funny joke, that's a really funny joke." SAM: It's a good one. I've been working on it.

MATT: "I can tell, it's workshopped well."

SAM: Well, we'll just have some whiskey, then.

MATT: "Whiskey, I got you whiskey." Puts a couple shots on the bar, fills them up.

SAM: Try it, Mr. Clay.

TALIESIN: (sniffs) Oh, that's a little strong.

SAM: It's from the earth, though, they made it from grains.

TALIESIN: (sniffs) I'm not sure this is-- this doesn't--

SAM: They take wheat and barley and stuff and then they mash it up and let sit outside-- they let it decompose a little bit!

TRAVIS: Please Roger Rabbit--

TALIESIN: Am I aware that he doesn't know-- okay. Am I aware that Sam doesn't actually know how whiskey's made?

SAM: That's how you do it! You take some, mash it together. Put it in a barrel.

TALIESIN: Oh, god, I don't know any of this, do I? Okay. Yeah, sure, okay, apparently.

TRAVIS: Yeah! Drink it!

SAM: Let's have a shot!

TALIESIN: Finish getting angry at Sam. Here we go.

MATT: Together, both tiny goblin Nott, with her rather large, comparatively, shot glass and very large Caduceus Clay,with a comparatively really tiny shot glass, both, in unisom, slam back.

TALIESIN: (coughing)

MATT: Bartender's already refilled yours.

TALIESIN: (hoarsely) Is it supposed to do that?

SAM: Oh, yes, very much. The earth is calling you to her.

TALIESIN: (groaning and coughing) (hoarsely) Do you have anything to take the edge off?

LAURA: Try some milk, that always helps.

MATT: He pours another glass of milk and pushes it forward.

TRAVIS: A milk chaser for your whiskeys?

TALIESIN: Oh, this is what people drink?

MARISHA: (stage whisper) Someone give him a white russian!

(laughter)

TRAVIS: How did we not go there first! Oh my god.

MARISHA: If you like milk, you'll love this.

TRAVIS: You got any Kahlua back there?

TALIESIN: You're the worst people!

MATT: Ever had a Cement Mixer?

TRAVIS: Can I find-- is it Kara?

MATT: Kara. She's at the back, waiting. She's watching you as you approach.

TRAVIS: We were gone for a while. When we left, Zadash was in a it of a tizzy. How is it in the city?

MATT: "It's apparently all right. Most of the business has made its way eastward. Things have gone back to normal."

TRAVIS: Troop presence about the same?

MATT: "Oh, most of the troop presence made its way out towards where the outposts were."

TRAVIS: Any coming back? Any wounded, any--?

MATT: "Not that I've been paying attention to at least."

TRAVIS: No incursions, no security problems?

MATT: "Not right now."

TRAVIS: Thank you.

MATT: "Of course. Come back and ask tomorrow, it might change, but-- Hey. Glad you're well."

TRAVIS: Thank you.

MARISHA: You all right there, bud?

TRAVIS: I don't think I take compliments very well.

MARISHA: No, you don't.

TRAVIS: Yeah. Whiskey!

MATT: The drinks are served around, you guys can take as much time here as you'd like to. Whatever you'd like to do.

SAM: We can leave, right?

MATT: Yeah, whatever you want. You can do whatever you want to do. The city is yours.

LIAM: I'm going to plonk down in front of Fjord, just for a minute, after everybody's milling about for a while.

MARISHA: I'm going to sit down as well. Sit in a little booth in the back corner. Back corner boothin'.

LIAM: This may be the alcohol-- it's the alcohol. Raise a glass, you two assholes. Here is to fucking making it work.

MARISHA: Oh god.

TRAVIS: You got out of that without any liquor on you. Real impressive.

MARISHA: Yeah, it was honestly-- this is why I don't wear white.

TRAVIS: Cheers.

LIAM: Congratulations on being alive.

TRAVIS and LIAM: Yeah.

MARISHA: Fjord, you survived being chained up and tortured. That's got to fuck with a person, right?

TRAVIS: Yeah, it-- More the disappointment. I expect better of myself. Let you guys down, I let Jester down, I let Yasha down. I'll never be able to shake this.

MARISHA: Fjord, you cannot keep blaming yourself when you were the victim in this circumstance. You understand that, right?

TRAVIS: No, I don't.

MARISHA: There are people to blame. I wasn't joking when I said it was someone's fault earlier, but it is not yours. The only person whose fucking fault it was is that fucking asshole Lorenzo's and fucking human traffickers.

TRAVIS: No, I get that. I do.

LIAM: You cannot blame yourself when you are taken advantage of. You know what I mean?

TRAVIS: You don't understand, though. My whole life was trying to blend in, trying to keep an eye out for someone that was looking to take advantage, that was going to exploit. I got comfortable. I felt relaxed. There's no reason why the three of us out on watch couldn't see them coming out and raise an alarm fast enough.

MARISHA: There's also no reason that the three of us couldn't have made a fucking plan that couldn't have gotten Molly killed.

TRAVIS: I'll drink to that.

LIAM: No, and we're never going to forget it. It's going to ride with us until we're dead.

TRAVIS: Yeah. It puts everything in perspective, though, I'll tell you that much.

LIAM: Yeah, those things don't go away. You carry that shit with you.

TRAVIS: I was floating around, trying to find my way to the Cerberus. I don't know if that's what I want to do anymore.

MARISHA: What do you want to do?

TRAVIS: I felt like I almost died and I hadn't taken care of any of the shit that got me here in the first place. I was so worried about trying to learn about these new abilities that-- I felt like I got distracted. I have people I want to find and things I want to remedy.

MARISHA: Yeah. How did Jester do? No offense, but she seems like she's a little bit more willfully stronger than you are.

TRAVIS: I mean, fuck, it's really disturbing. Like, she came out of there like a little kettle of popcorn, just no problem. I mean-- Can I see Jester? Is she nearby?

MATT: Jester, are you nearby?

LAURA: I'm across the bar just fucking dancing alone.

(laughter)

SAM: Just Sixteen Candles-ing it.

MARISHA: Yep.

TRAVIS: I was worried. There were really dark times. I would hear Jester singing to herself at night and then she'd change lyrics, and then *my* name would be in the lyrics sometimes. Every morning, she would try and cheer everybody up that was around her, but she had the muffle? So I couldn't tell if my brain was playing tricks on me, or if she was just-- I don't think there's much that gets her down. It's kind of inspiring.

LIAM: I think it is an act.

TRAVIS: An act?

LIAM: I think it is an act.

TRAVIS: It is kind of fucked that there's no music right now, and she's just--

MATT: Can't force the playlist.

LIAM: No, she has a lot of-- she's an amazing woman, but talent is different than happiness, I guess.

MARISHA: I don't know, she looks fucking stoked to me right now.

LIAM: Well, she's very drunk.

MARISHA: Yeah.

LAURA: Nuh-uh.

LIAM: Yeah.

TALIESIN: I'm going to join this table. I've had six drinks. I'm in the biggest city I've ever been in. Everything tastes terrible! I don't even know what these last two are; they're just terrible!

MARISHA: You don't drink it because it tastes good.

LIAM: Mr. Clay, have a seat. Drop a deuce.

MARISHA: Eyy!

TRAVIS: That was well placed.

MARISHA: If it had to be anywhere.

SAM: He's making fun of your name!

TALIESIN: Oh yeah, no, I've heard it before.

LIAM: I mean, it's well-natured, though.

SAM: Of course!

TRAVIS: You've heard it before? Did you have a lot of cemetery folks that were good for good-natured ribbing?

TALIESIN: You'd be amazed at how people deal with a grieving process. I mean, you're going through it right now.

TRAVIS: Yep.

MARISHA: I go: (yelling) Jester! Nott!

SAM: What?

MARISHA: (yelling) Come sit down! Damn it!

SAM: Okay! Have you not thrown up yet?

TALIESIN: Is that part of-- are you supposed to?

SAM: You will.

TRAVIS: How's your face feel?

TALIESIN: Normal face style, I suppose.

MARISHA: Go like this, go: (trills)

TALIESIN: (trills)

MARISHA: Can you feel it? Can you feel that?

TALIESIN: I can feel my lips doing that.

TRAVIS: He's pretty tall. He's a big guy.

SAM: It's a lot of weight.

LIAM: You can't properly be part of civilization until you've gotten shit-faced and thrown up.

TRAVIS: Oh! You know what you're going to be good for when it's cold? Fucking hot toddies.

MARISHA: (gasps)

TALIESIN: I've made a hot toddy before.

TRAVIS: I bet you make a great hot toddy. Out of some dead folks' feet.

MARISHA: Oh, man.

TALIESIN: Cinnamon lemon tea.

LIAM: Bit of a little side conversation. I slap down the rest of my Goldschläger.

TALIESIN: Eww! God!

MATT: Your Hpnotiq? Your Malibu?

LIAM: No. You, have some more. You will dance better, *ja*. You have just survived death!

LAURA: I don't need any help to dance better! I dance pretty good.

LIAM: I understand that, but we are dancing along the razor's edge of death, so, you know, I feel like you should embrace the morbidity of life.

SAM: You don't have to drink it--

LIAM: You definitely do not have to.

MARISHA: No, you don't have to.

LIAM: *Definitely* don't have to.

MARISHA and LIAM: Not at all.

LAURA: I feel like this is reverse psychology.

LIAM: Don't drink it, whatever you do.

LAURA: I don't know what I'm supposed to do now!

LIAM: You are supposed to not drink that--

SAM: Have you ever had liquor?

LAURA: Yes, of course.

SAM: Oh. Well, what happened?

LIAM: *Ja.*

LAURA: Well. I mean I had like--

LIAM: Are we talking when you were a little girl with the--?

LAURA: There you go. Nothing happens!

SAM: That's it?

LAURA: Yeah.

SAM: I don't think-- no, she's never drunk.

LIAM: I don't think so.

SAM: Why not?

LAURA: You know, milk is just so good.

SAM: It is very good.

TALIESIN: I don't know if I agree with that, but--

SAM: Is there a reason why you won't drink? Are you afraid?

LAURA: Afraid? I'm not *afraid* of anything!

SAM: Wow, that's intense.

LIAM: Look at her biceps, they're quite large. There's no reason to be afraid of anything. Nevermind.

LAURA: Look at these things!

SAM: They're huge!

LIAM: Do you know what, we are all just happy to be alive. It was just the spirit of the moment. I don't mean to pressure you.

TALIESIN: I would like to try something that tastes *good*. That's what I would like to have. Should have just ordered that from the first place, something that tastes good.

LAURA: Oh my gosh, Mr. Clay, have you ever had a doughnut?

TALIESIN: No.

LAURA: Have you ever had any pastries?

TALIESIN: Well, I mean, I've made bread, but I don't--

LAURA: (gasps) You know where we should take him?

MARISHA: That one place right next to the smut shop that had the really good doughnuts?

TALIESIN: What's a smut shop?

TRAVIS: (singing) Oh, life is going to unfold in front of you!

LAURA: I feel like we should go to the bathhouse. That's where Molly would want us to go.

MARISHA: Molly *would* want us to go to the bathhouse.

LIAM: You know, hold on a second. Grab your milk. Everybody raise a glass.

LAURA and MARISHA: (singing) To freedom!

LIAM: No.

(laughter)

LIAM: Oh. To that purple devil. To Mollymauk Tealeaf.

MARISHA: To the Tealeaf.

TRAVIS: Hear, hear.

MARISHA: Now to our *new* Tealeaf.

TALIESIN: (laughs) That's funny.

LIAM: That's ironic.

TRAVIS: Yeah, it is.

TALIESIN: Purely coincidental. Really, purely coincidental.

TRAVIS: Oh, definitely the bathhouse and Pumat, right?

MARISHA: Oh yeah.

TRAVIS: It's been like a month. He's got to have some cool shit.

LIAM: Fjord, you want to go shopping this week, yeah?

TRAVIS: Sure. (sniffs)

(laughter)

SAM: He's very drunk. Must be drunk.

LIAM: What would you like? What kind of swords would you like to eat this week? Would you like to eat like a sai? Like, you know, like Raphael's weapon? Or would you like to have, maybe--

TRAVIS: Raphael, the mason?

SAM: The tortle!

LIAM: He's a bard from--

MARISHA: You talking about experimenting with how many weapons we can see--

LIAM: Yeah, what could we put into his mouth? This is all out of character, I don't know any of this stuff, but I would like to talk to Travis about swallowing whole, long swords.

TRAVIS: I didn't really swallow the last one. It just kind of absorbed.

LIAM: Yeah, keep telling yourself that, big guy.

MARISHA: So here's my question. If we don't turn in the crystal eyeball--

TALIESIN and MARISHA: Cloven Crystal.

LIAM: Fuckable cantaloupe.

MARISHA: If we don't have that, does that mean bounty hunters are going to come after you?

LAURA: No, no, they would come after Ionos. Lonos. Jonas. I'm not sure.

MATT: It's Ionos.

SAM: Ionos?

TRAVIS: Jonos!

LAURA: It's a special "I" on there. I can't tell.

LIAM: May I have a look at that? Oh, Keen Mind.

MATT: There you go. You have to delete that in 30 days.

TRAVIS: No, nobody knows about its current origins. We just know who was looking for it and who it was supposed to go to.

SAM: Did you notice The Gentleman's face when you mentioned that name?

TRAVIS: Yeah?

SAM: He looked over at Ophelia. It was very suspicious.

TRAVIS: Yeah, I thought that was just the bone-dogging look.

SAM: No, you have to pick up on the subtleties of the human expression to get this stuff. Jester and I saw it. It was definitely suspicious.

LIAM: Yeah, he started sweating out of nervousness.

SAM: He did! Very good, Caleb! It's a tell, is what it is.

LAURA: We should see if he knows the name Avantika.

SAM: I think I'll go mention it to The Gentleman.

LAURA: But just say it like--

SAM: In passing!

LAURA: Yeah, don't make it obvious. It's a casual sort of name.

SAM: Is he still in the bar?

MATT: He's in the bar. He's actually near the stairs. At this point, the two drivers have brought down all the handbags for Ophelia and have placed them in a pile at the base of it.

TRAVIS: Matching Gucci luggage?

MATT: Yeah. It looks like she's shacking up in the Underworks for a little bit while they re-establish this trade route. So they're in a bit of conversation, flirtatiously. He seems-- it's like a subtle Pepe le Pew scenario, where he's definitely laying it on a bit thick and she's being very dodgy and playful, but, you know.

TALIESIN: "Establishing trade routes."

MARISHA: Do we see this? Do we see this happening?

MATT: You can see it at a distance, yeah.

MARISHA: She's totally flirting with him just to get the goods.

LIAM: You think so?

MARISHA: Oh, yeah! She doesn't actually, like, *want* this, she just wants to maintain a good relationship.

LIAM: *He* is laying it on thick.

MARISHA: Yep. Look, she's like, "Mmm, please stop touching me."

LIAM: Well, I will trust you, because you are-- I'm going to quit while I'm ahead.

TRAVIS: That was a good bail-out.

MARISHA: Hey, Caleb.

LIAM: Yeah?

MARISHA: You're a good friend. Please don't ever ask me about my sex life.

LIAM: I say this with the utmost gravity. I have *no interest* in your sex life. Do you believe me? Insight check me.

LAURA: What's an insight check?

MARISHA: I only have gold; I don't have checks.

LIAM: (sighs) You're a good friend.

SAM: Let's get out of this place.

TRAVIS: Aren't you going to yell the name out? (shouting) Antigua! Antigua!

SAM and LAURA: That's not the name.

SAM: That's an island.

LIAM: We're going to Florida!

TRAVIS: Did it work?

SAM: No, I don't think that would do it.

LIAM: Every 50th episode, Critical Role has to have a drunken bar night. It's in a contract somewhere.

MATT: I think it is, yeah. It's in our own internal friend contract.

TALIESIN: Pub crawl? Pub crawl?

LAURA: Go, go, go!

SAM: Okay, I'm going to stumble over to The Gentleman, and say: I think we're going to head out now, but if you need us, we'll probably be at The Leaky Tap or something.

MATT: "Oh, that's fine. You know where to find me if you need anything as well."

SAM: Sure, sure. We've been summoned by this person named Avantika, so we're probably going to go find--

MATT: "All right. Well, if there's anything you require from me, let me know."

SAM: Okay. You don't know where she is in town?

MATT: "Can't say I do."

SAM: Or he? I'm not really sure.

MATT: "No."

SAM: Okay. Cool, cool, cool.

LAURA: (whispering) Can you insight check him?

SAM: Well, off we go! Oh, Jester! Don't forget! We're going to talk about the Captain later!

LAURA: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

MATT: He's already talking to Ophelia. He isn't paying attention. He's now having various members of his troupe pick up her bags for her and move her into one of the other chambers.

LAURA: I was insight checking him while Nott was talking to him.

MATT: Make an insight check.

LIAM: Come on.

LAURA: No. 12.

MATT: At this distance, you can't even see his face, unfortunately, so it's hard. You're seeing body movement a little bit, but his gestures seem to be in line with classic Gentleman.

LAURA: I feel like his hands moved a little bit more, but I can't tell for sure. There was tension! There was tension in his fist. Right here, I saw.

SAM: Yeah. I couldn't focus because there was so much dripping going on. It's a mask of water. It's disgusting.

LAURA: I kind of like it. I think it looks cool.

TALIESIN: How do you make a non-tense fist? I'm trying to--

LAURA: Like this. Well, you know--

SAM: No, no.

TRAVIS: Keep going! Follow that thread! Pull on that string!

LIAM: Be like water.

SAM: All right, let's get the fuck out of here!

TRAVIS: Super hammered, we stumble out.

MATT: You guys stumble your way out of The Evening Nip, back into the streets of Zadash, to find your fortune, to enjoy the fruits of your labor, and, the best way you can, maintain the memory of a man who lived life to its fullest. A man, a woman, a they-- to the fullest.

MARISHA: I light a few cherry bombs and throw them at my friends in celebration.

TRAVIS: You have cherry bombs? The fuck those come from?!

MATT: Fireworks are going off in the center of the street. (popping)

MARISHA: For Molly!

MATT: Some horses freak out, and some carts get dragged down at a fast pace down the road.

LIAM: Yeah, I drunkenly form the Goblight!

SAM: Oh! (vocalizing) My whole body starts glowing with the light. You set me on fire!

MARISHA: (shouting) It's all for Molly!

MATT: A confusing display follows you.

TALIESIN: I've made a terrible mistake.

MATT: Heading towards the Pentamarket. That's where we'll pick up next week.

LIAM: Caduceus Clay! We are your destiny!

TALIESIN: Oh no. This is a lot.

MATT: We'll pick up on that next Thursday. You guys will have some downtime! We'll have a couple weeks of game downtime for your characters, if there's anything you want to accomplish.

LIAM: I'm going to do so much!

SAM: Do we tell you now, or later?

MATT: Think about it over the next week, and the beginning of the next episode, we'll discuss what it is you want to accomplish, and we might have a few momentary role play moments depending on what it is you want to do. That involves contacts, purchases, research, looking for information, anything you want to do specific to your character. Start thinking about that throughout the week.

SAM: Money-wise, we each get 964 more gold.

LAURA: Can we make that platinum? Because most of that is platinum. What would that be?

SAM: 964 each.

MATT: That's 96 platinum and four gold.

LIAM: Oh, man, that's great. All my spell books and scrolls will be converted in the next week! Huzzah! Are you sure we can't play for another seven hours tonight? Just this once? Just one ten-hour Critical Role episode?

LAURA: Do you remember that tavern called The Leaky Nip?

TALIESIN: Wow. Have you been sitting on that all night? Because that was amazing.

MATT: If I didn't have a 9:00am call time in Santa Monica tomorrow, I would be totally down for it.

LIAM: So you're saying there's a chance.

MATT: Yes. No, I'm good. Anyway, thank you guys. Laura and Travis, welcome back. So happy to have you. Ashley, we love you. Happy birthday. We'll have you back as soon as we can get you. We love you. And we love *you,* all you guys coming and hanging out with us tonight for our silly adventure. Once again, it was wonderful to meet everybody at Gen Con. Thank you for joining us there, thank you for joining us for the live show, thank you for joining us tonight, and is it Thursday yet? Good night.

[music]