Transcript:Red Moon Rising

Pre-show
MATT: Hello everyone, and welcome to tonight's episode of Critical Role, where a bunch of us nerdy-ass voice actors sit around and play Dungeons & Dragons.

ALL: (hollering) We play Dungeons & Dragons!

MATT: Bef--

MARISHA: (laughs)

MATT: Ooh, we're slap-happy tonight. (laughs) Before we jump into tonight's episode, we do have some announcements to get through, beginning with our first sponsor, Ultra PRO. Sam.

SAM: Your favorite tabletop adventuring parties are getting the Ultra PRO treatment. Vox Machina, the Mighty Nein, Bells Hells will see their own gaming accessories, perfect for tabletop RPGs of all kinds, from Ultra PRO. Each character from Bells Hells will get their own RPG folio. Eh?

ASHLEY: Ooh, wow!

SAM: The ultimate tool in organization and they come with matching stickers. But Matt, instead of me talking about Ultra PRO, wouldn't you rather watch a clip from a 1986 movie produced by Ultra PRO called "I Can't Pro For That," and starring '80s acting sensation, Gale?

MATT: Gale? Oh, heck yeah!

SAM: I've got the VHS right here. And play.

TRAVIS: Glad we mounted that.

MARISHA: (transition noises)

SAM: This is a movie now.

LAURA: As student council president, welcome, Gale, to Miller Huber High.

ASHLEY: Hey! Gee, thanks. I hope everyone here is as totally gnarly as you!

LIAM: (exaggerated mean laugh) Peep the new kid, what a dork!

TALIESIN: Yeah, your notepad is perfect... for my grandma! (mean laugh)

LIAM: And that playmat is uglier than your face!

LIAM and TALIESIN: (exaggerated mean laugh) Nailed it!

ASHLEY: Hey goobers, that's really not cool!

TALIEIN: "Not cool," like your generic folio, dweeb? (laughs)

ASHLEY: Oh man! My first day and I'm already a poser. Looks like high school's already ruined. (exaggerated sigh)

TRAVIS: Yo, Chett.

MARISHA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: I bet you I could turn that nerd into a popular kid.

MARISHA: (scoffs) No way, Brett. That loser? "Gale"? Bet you 10 bucks you can't.

TRAVIS: You're on like Donkey Kong.

MARISHA: Yeah. (exaggerated grunts)

TRAVIS: (exaggerated grunts) Oh, hold on. (grunts)

SAM: Prop.

LAURA: What the shit?

ASHLEY: Oh, I put my old stuff down.

TRAVIS: Yo! Here, Gale.

ASHLEY: Whoa!

TRAVIS: Take some swiggity sweet Ultra PRO gear. Consider it a Miller Huber High welcome gift.

ASHLEY: Dude, gag me with a spoon! Oh wow, a premium Bells Hells Book Folio with a pocket to store notes and maps and stuff? 10 wet erase compatible pages for character sheets, 10 wet erase compatible pages for character sheets, and two... nine-pocket pages for standard spell cards?! And an elastic loop to store a pencil or a marker?! And a Critical Role graph paper notepad?! And the added pocket to... slide-- (laughter)

ASHLEY: -- in the back cover of any source book for easy access? Wicked awesome!

TRAVIS: Oh, and there's also funky fresh playmats featuring previous Crit Role campaign crews.

ASHLEY: Whoa.

TRAVIS: Vox Machina deck-protector sleeves, and tons of dice-related items like Dice Towers, Dice Trays, even premium Deck Boxes. ♪ Sick! ♪

ASHLEY: Oh, I'm Gale!

TRAVIS: I'm Brett.

LIAM: Lookie who it is. The Freakazoid! Sorry, it hadn't scrolled yet. Let's stuff Gale in the locker, dude!

ASHLEY: Oh!

TALIESIN: Dude, wait. Look, is that radical swag from Ultra PRO?

LIAM: Oh, tubular! We were so wrong about you, Gale. You're the most popular kid in school!

ASHLEY: Hey, thanks for making me popular, Brett. Oh, I think I'm falling for you. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Ditto, babe.

MARISHA: (laughing cough) Well, well, well, looks like you won the bet, Brett. 10 bucks for making Gale cool, bruh.

TRAVIS: That's a 20, but okay.

MARISHA: Yeah, just give me change later.

ASHLEY: Brett, was this some kind of prank? You tricked me?

TRAVIS: No. I mean, yes. It started out as a lie, but then I fell in love with you. That was real. Do you forgive me?

LAURA: (laughs)

ASHLEY: God, no! (record scratch)

TRAVIS: Wait, what? Well, can I have my Ultra PRO stuff back, then?

ASHLEY: Get bent, hoser!

TRAVIS: Oh!

TALIESIN: What about us? Will you be our friends?

ASHLEY: 100% no! I'm Gale, gosh darn it, and I have something better than friends, I have self-confidence and I'm going to burn down the goddamn school and run away with this student council president!

LAURA: Want to take my truck?

ASHLEY: Sure babe, but I'm driving. Let's get the fuck out of here. Ultra PRO!

LAURA: Fuck yeah!

SAM: Oh, what a good movie. Well, maybe it was a terrible movie. But Ultra PRO is great. Get yours today at ultrapro.com/criticalrole. Matt, back to you. (laughter)

SAM: That was great, you guys!

LAURA: That was so much!

MATT: That was on par with a lot of '80s high school features, actually. (laughs)

SAM: When you took your hair down, it was like you were a totally different person.

LAURA: I didn't even know it was the same person.

SAM: Wow!

ASHLEY: You didn't?

SAM: Amazing transformation.

ASHLEY: Well, Ultra PRO can make you real cool. (laughter)

ASHLEY: Moral of the story.

MATT: Thank you, Sam. This episode is also sponsored by NordVPN.

TRAVIS: ♪ NordVPN! ♪

MATT: Browse the internet safely, but most importantly, freely. Even when traveling abroad, you don't want to miss your favorite content. Open the map, click on a location, and you'll be connected in seconds. It's that easy. Cyber attacks are not a hoax. Online crimes are steadily growing every year, with millions of people falling victim to hackers, losing their personal data and money. More than ever, it begins to look like a game of cat and mouse. Your password is your first line of defense.

SAM: Okay.

MATT: Unfortunately, most people just don't take it seriously, happy to use simple passwords or set the same password for multiple accounts. This allows hackers to try a number of tricks to break in. One way around this is to turn on Dark Web Monitor to get alerts about your credentials that appear on background hacker websites. So use the free NordPass password manager to generate and automatically fill in strong passwords for you. A VPN is one of those things that are just good to have. This two-year plan includes a huge discount and bonus gift for free. So head on over to nordvpn.com/criticalrole to try it risk-free right now with a 30-day money back guarantee. Thank you, NordVPN, for your continued support. (cheering)

SAM: Micro Machines!

LAURA: Oh my god, I remember those commercials.

LIAM: Got a guy.

LAURA: Hey, guess what? There's four new items available in all the CR shops. First up, and I'm really proud of it, is this Critical Role dice tome rolling tray.

SAM: What does that mean? What does that do?

LAURA: Hold on, I got to get the packaging out.

SAM: You were about to show it to us before we started.

TALIESIN: And then you said no.

LAURA: I know, and then I said, don't look at-- Oh, I ripped the packaging.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

LAURA: Sorry. (laughter)

TRAVIS: She's a rebel!

LAURA: Art is by Sophie Humphries. Look. It says Critical Role Explorer's Guide to Jrusar, Volume One.

SAM: Nice.

LAURA: And then you open it up.

ASHLEY: And then what?

LAURA: It's a rolling tray, bitches!

TALIESIN: Ooh!

LAURA: Look, it's a rolling tray. It comes with this foam, so everything keeps nice and safe.

ASHLEY: It comes with a sweet silica gel packet!

LAURA: Yeah!

ASHLEY: Keep it nice and fresh!

LAURA: You can put dice in here.

MARISHA: We're back in the '80s, you guys.

LAURA: Seriously, though.

SAM: That's really cool.

LAURA: It's really cool.

LIAM: Roll for initiative, dude! (laughter)

LAURA: Forever, the whole episode. Then we also have some more dice! (triumphant fanfare) Mighty Nein dice. I've got Jester ones.

SAM: Oh, those are great.

LAURA: Ooh!

TRAVIS: Those look like pastry.

LAURA: Caleb ones.

LIAM: Burning Caleb ones.

TALIESIN: Ooh!

LAURA: Then we've also got-- Matt, look. We have Traveler ones. (oohing and aahing)

LAURA: Do you want to use them?

MATT: (like Artagan) I'm excited to try them.

LAURA: Here you go, Traveler. Whatever you want.

MATT: Thank you kindly.

LAURA: So yeah, check them out. They're in the stores. Da, da, da. That's all I got.

TRAVIS: ♪ Dat, dat, dat ♪

LAURA: ♪ Do, do, do, do, donuts ♪

MATT: (laughs) There it is. Thank you, Laura.

LAURA: You're welcome. Cupcake!

MATT: Oh, cupcake! And with cupcake, I believe that brings us to the end of our announcements.

TRAVIS: Bring it, bro!

MATT: Let's go ahead and jump into tonight's episode of Critical Role. (excited roaring)

Part I
MATT: And welcome back. So, last we left off, Bells Hells, you've been traversing the length and breadth of Marquet in your skyship, the Silver Sun in transit as time clicks closer and closer to the Apogee Solstice. Upon many days of challenging encounters, terrifying weather, a few boons in your way, a quick stop at Bassuras to pick up a few magical items with some of the money that you've saved, a few connections, taking on board a terrifying fey entity that you've battled in the past as an antagonist, and then heading in a northeast direction to the-- Well, you know, Ira Wendagoth.

SAM: Nightmare King.

MATT: (sinisterly) Nightmare King.

MARISHA: I thought you were talking about the dead-- never mind.

MATT: No worries. But you've reached out to a few allies, a possible promise of a cavalry when the time is right, and you now zero in on the final day before the solstice finds its way above the skies of Marquet. the solstice finds its way above the skies of Marquet. So, as the sun begins to rise over the distant horizon, the cracked and dusty landscape of the Hellcatch Valley before you, the mounting winds of a darkened gray sandstorm the mounting winds of a darkened gray sandstorm that begins to cruise and press near or in your direction in the days to come, the day is yours to plan and prepare and tell me what you wish to do as you approach.

MARISHA: That's right, it was an "at dawn, we plan" situation.

SAM: We did no planning.

LIAM: Don't we plan more--

LAURA: Nothing, nothing.

TRAVIS: Well, after eight years, I think we've figured out that, you know, planning or no planning--

MARISHA: So far.

TRAVIS: -- it's all the same.

MARISHA: Yeah.

ASHLEY: It's all the same, yeah.

LAURA: (laughs)

MATT: A basic structure and then throw it out the window when you actually get there.

SAM: So, the solstice has not begun.

MATT: Correct.

SAM: It begins--

LAURA: Tonight. Is it wee hours of the morning right now, you said?

MATT: It's the wee hours of the morning. It happens tonight or happens tomorrow. You're not sure the exact timing.

LIAM: (Irish accent) Starts in 12 to 24 hours.

ASHLEY: Maybe it happens when the moon comes up.

LAURA: Maybe.

TALIESIN: That would make sense.

ASHLEY: If tonight--

LAURA: I mean, yeah. Okay.

SAM: Do we want... It's nighttime, we're about to go to sleep, is that right?

MATT: Well, no, you're just waking up.

LAURA: No, it's early morning.

LIAM: Just waking up.

MATT: The morning is beginning.

SAM: We're about to go to sleep.

LIAM: This is the day before everything.

MARISHA: Like the depressed people we are.

ASHLEY: This is the day before everything? (laughter)

ASHLEY: I thought today was the day.

TRAVIS: Fucking perfect. Perfect.

LAURA: This is what we were just saying!

TRAVIS: We should just get our coffins, and our caskets, our measurements now. It was perfect.

ASHLEY: Wait, I thought today we woke up and today's the first day.

LAURA: No. Maybe tonight could be the first night.

ASHLEY: What is happening? (laughter)

ASHLEY: What's the Apogee Solstice?

LIAM: This is how you know it's scripted.

MARISHA: This is it. (laughter)

SAM: But here's the problem. Here's my problem.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

SAM: This is Sam Riegel. You can tell because of no southern twang.

LAURA: Oh, uh-huh.

ASHLEY: Oh, okay.

SAM: We can't reconnaissance.

LAURA: (as Sam) "We can't."

SAM: We can't recon. We can't, we're in a big fucking ship!

LAURA: No.

SAM: So what do we do? What, are we going to fly up and be like, "Don't look at us!"

LAURA: How do we get close?

MARISHA: Wait!

LAURA: Do we land far away? This is Imogen now, I don't know.

TRAVIS: We do have someone that can fly and we have ways to make them invisible. Or you could make someone fly and make them invisible.

SAM: These are the ideas that I need.

MARISHA: We have to have a ground team. We have to have an infiltration team, right?

LAURA: I think that--

SAM: Oh. Okay.

LAURA: Are we our character now?

SAM: Yeah, we're in-character now.

ASHLEY: What are we doing?

LIAM: Oh, we're in it? Okay.

LAURA: Okay. I don't know.

ASHLEY: Oh god, I slept like shit.

TALIESIN: We don't actually know what Ira does.

LAURA: -- he's going to be-- (laughter)

TALIESIN: Yeah, we're going there.

TRAVIS: Got to get the hands on the-- There you go.

LIAM: What are we going to do, Imogen? (laughter)

MARISHA: Oh god, just cancel the solstice. Let's go home.

LAURA: If we're invisible and we're flying--

LIAM: Yeah?

TRAVIS: Start fucking.

LAURA: Somebody could see-- Orgy.

MARISHA: Orgy 2.0.

LAURA: Somebody could see us that's really powerfully magic, right? They can see things that are invisible?

SAM: Somebody is.

LAURA: I imagine.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

ASHLEY: Oh.

LIAM: Well, here's the thing, though. The ship is so large, we need to build in the time to park it far away.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

LIAM: That's travel time.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

LIAM: So we need appropriate travel time. We could send someone flying in, but that's too far to go on your own.

TRAVIS: Yeah, if it's an hour of flying and your travel speed is like, what, 40 or 50 feet while you're flying?

LAURA: 40, I think, yeah.

TRAVIS: So you'd have to get far enough away to be able to half hour, 20 minutes there, look around for 10, 20 minutes back.

SAM: Point of order. We don't know where "there" is.

TRAVIS: No.

LIAM: No.

SAM: So we don't even know, okay, it feels like we're far enough to disembark.

TRAVIS: Right.

SAM: We have to find it first.

TRAVIS: Yep.

SAM: Then when we find it, they can see us.

TALIESIN: How far is the--

TRAVIS: Yeah.

SAM: Shit!

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MARISHA: The scry ball?

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MARISHA: Like 1,000 feet.

TALIESIN: Okay, that's not--

SAM: Can we do a cloud around us so that we can at least get--

LAURA: So we're one moving cloud? That's not obvious at all in the sky.

SAM: Well, I mean--

MARISHA: It's a sandstormy day, right? As you said, it's cloudy. What's the weather?

MATT: It looks like there will be some winds and dust coming in a number of hours from now, yes.

SAM: Clouds, though? No clouds?

MATT: Not heavy. I mean, there's clouds in the sky, but there's no storm blowing, and there's just heavy winds picking up a dust storm at most.

SAM: For instance, could we go into the cumulonimbus clouds and hide up there if we did some skill check?

MATT: You can certainly try.

TRAVIS: Oh jeez.

MARISHA: Yes, maybe we do a super high altitude.

LIAM: So you want to--

SAM: The cirrus level?

TRAVIS: A Halo drop?

MARISHA: A Halo drop.

LIAM: You want to nail our plan to the weather?

SAM: Well, how else do we-- We don't even know where it is! We can't do anything unless we first find it, and we can't find it if we're visible. So we should go in the clouds.

TALIESIN: Yeah, it is a good plan.

TRAVIS: In that vision that you had in the dream, we saw a sinkhole.

LAURA: A giant hole, yeah.

TRAVIS: We obviously went into the sinkhole, we saw a bunch of other stuff. Outside the sinkhole, do you remember, does she remember? Do you remember any kind of identifying features?

SAM: Features?

LAURA: Oh right, I think there was--

TRAVIS: Landmarks?

LAURA: Sand and dirt.

ASHLEY: Sand, ruins.

TRAVIS: Was there a Whataburger?

ASHLEY: There's ruins.

TALIESIN: Cuts it down a little bit.

LAURA: Turn right at the Whataburger.

MATT: Now, as part of the dream, it wasn't an extremely clear take on everything around you. It was mainly like you can make out shapes and some details around you, like they're on the very far periphery of your vision at all times unless you focused on something, and you were focused on your mother.

TRAVIS: Right. Selfish.

MATT: (laughs) You remember aspects. You remember the pit, you remember some of the structure and the architecture within. You remember seeing on the outside of the pit there was what looked like small encampments with some winding steps with some winding steps and two long descents that continued down into the pit from the above lip of it.

LAURA: Mm-hmm. Crossways that went back and forth across the pit, right?

MATT: Some of the bridges did, but they never crossed the center.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: They were all off to the side, but yeah.

LAURA: Okay.

MARISHA: If we get close enough, or at least high enough or something, I can always send in Pâté to do a little flyby.

TALIESIN: We do have a mystery box that we haven't opened yet.

SAM: What's that?

MARISHA: Ira.

TALIESIN: Ira.

MARISHA: We should include him in all of these plans.

TALIESIN: We don't know what the fuck-- What the fuck can he do?

TRAVIS: Oh yeah, he can teleport in and out of stuff, maybe he could--

MARISHA: We already learned--

SAM: Has he been there?

TRAVIS: I think he said he has had an eye on them, right?

LIAM: I mean, we're just guessing.

LAURA: That's right! He would know exactly where it is based on his telescope.

SAM: Ira, get the fuck up here!

MATT: (laughs)

ASHLEY: Oh, that's right, he's with us.

MARISHA: He can only bamf a little bit. I think he can only--

SAM: Huh?

TRAVIS: That's okay, even if it's just him--

MARISHA: Like Dimension Door. 500 feet.

TRAVIS: -- or plus one person. I think he said he could take somebody with him last time.

MARISHA: I have a feeling it's like--

SAM and LAURA: Dimension Door?

MARISHA: Yeah.

LAURA: Yeah, 500 feet.

TRAVIS: Ira!

SAM: Oh, Ira?

MATT: You head down into the chamber that Ira's chosen--

TRAVIS: Wait, we're going down to him?

MATT: -- for his quarters, and it's a musty storage chamber under deck, beneath the deck. As you open the door and call the name out, you can see perched up in the corner, just sitting up there, the legs curled up, the arms out, the head unfurls from within the coat and looks at you with a smile.

TRAVIS: There's no fucking reason. You don't need to do that.

MATT: "You called my name?"

MARISHA: Did you sleep like that?

LAURA: (laughs)

MATT: "Well, I mean, the quarters are a bit cramped, but you make do with what you're given."

TALIESIN: Don't judge.

TRAVIS: Ira, listen, we were just contemplating our approach and how we might be able to do some basic reconnaissance, because instead of just dropping down and smiting the earth and everything contained within, we might want to try and salvage a soul or two before we do so. So we were curious, you have the ability to jump from space to space. First of all, have you been to this site in person yet, as you were keeping an eye on them?

MATT: "In person? No, but I know where it is and how we can get there."

LAURA: Oh, great.

TRAVIS: That's a big help.

TALIESIN: Look at that.

ASHLEY: That's a very big help.

TRAVIS: Well, so, to--

LIAM: How do you mean?

MATT: "I've seen it. The device that I built with the Calloways allowed me to locate it."

LIAM: Would you be able to judge how close we are and--

LAURA: When we should land and--

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: His arms reach out and push past you into the hallway and clambers around in almost a corkscrew as he heads down to the stairway that leads up to the deck.

LIAM: Totally unnecessary.

LAURA: (laughs)

TALIESIN: I'm kind of into it.

TRAVIS: Just to be clear, your intention is to destroy this device, not use it or salvage it in any way?

MATT: You're asking him this on the deck? Are you following him as he goes up there?

TRAVIS: Yes.

MATT: Okay. He goes, "I wish to destroy everything they've worked on."

TRAVIS: Somebody insight check him, please.

ASHLEY: I will.

LAURA: I was going to say.

MATT: Both of you make insight checks.

ASHLEY: Okay, okay.

LAURA and TRAVIS: (silly noises)

TRAVIS: Mine's not bad.

LAURA: 22.

SAM: Ooh, why don't you roll in that dice tray?

MATT: 22?

ASHLEY: Well, it's over yonder.

MARISHA: She just pulled out a whole-ass kit.

ASHLEY: 18.

MATT: 18, okay.

SAM: Oh, whispers!

LAURA: I know, I know, I forgot to roll mine.

SAM: I don't think I'm supposed to read this for whispers. It says, "For combat only."

LAURA: (laughs)

SAM: But fuck it. "This combat is brought to you by WizKids Minis."

TRAVIS: Yeah, we don't know.

SAM: "Join forces with the Mighty Nein to take on the terrifying Uk'otoa."

ALL: (overlapping whispers) Uk'otoa.

SAM: "Preorder painted or unpainted versions of this behemoth today. You can expand your collection of Critical Role minis at wizkids.io/crminis or your LGS." Right? Is that what you say? YLGS? Your Local Game Store? Isn't there, like--

TALIESIN: Now they know.

MATT: FLGS, it's Friendly Local Game Store.

SAM: That's right, thank you. Thank you.

TRAVIS: Friendly neighborhood Spider-Man.

MATT: Yep.

SAM: FLGS.

MATT: He looks at you for a second, smiling as he finishes his phrase and then clambers off to the edge of the deck and you watch as he reaches into his coat and pulls out this tiny, little spyglass that extends like this long needle.

TRAVIS: Ooh, wow.

MATT: The end unravels a clockwork device into this extended lens that seems to almost (poof) appear out of space with this flash of fey energy. He puts it up to his eye, and you watch as it curls, not unlike the end of the device, the key replication that you saw in the hideaway, and shifts its upper body a bit this way, a bit this way, the wind blowing his ears a bit to the side before it retracts. Puts it back into his coat, turns around. "Captain, we're going this way." He points and leans in, his whole body forming an extended, weird weather vane, as he arcs his long, gnarled finger in the direction that he emphasizes as the Captain in the back, Xandis goes, "Sure, all right. Well, go ahead and follow where it's going. Why would I argue with the giant spider man?" And begins to slightly arc the ship in the direction it's going, and begins taking a few notes. On a side table, where the small map that Captain Xandis has, they're also marking the trajectory of where they're heading. With that, Ira returns back around. "But I surmise it won't be too long, so-- (inhales) What are we doing?"

TRAVIS: A few hours? Less?

MATT: "I'd say probably half a day's journey."

LAURA: Half a day.

TRAVIS: Fair enough. We're going to communicate this to the Captain, but one of our fallback plans is to use this ship itself as a weapon. We're hoping that might catch them off-guard.

MATT: "(laughs)"

TRAVIS: Thought you'd like that. But--

MATT: "That's fun."

TRAVIS: I figure maybe I should go talk to Xandis and sort of start to introduce the idea.

SAM: Sure. There are other crew members that will need to get off the ship.

TRAVIS: I don't think so. The captain's the only one that survives this. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Do you want to talk to El Nightmare King to communicate how we're going to go in quiet?

SAM: Sure.

LAURA: Well, we got to figure out how we're going to go in quiet, right?

SAM: We're going to set down. I assume we're going to set down a couple hours out?

TRAVIS: Yeah, we do want to set out of visual range, so they can't see us, whether we're high or low. In this case, low would serve us best, right? As close to the horizon as possible.

SAM: Yeah, get all the innocent folk off the ship and us in a scouting party.

TRAVIS: I don't know. I mean, let's think about it, FCG.

SAM: All right.

TRAVIS: What if we sacrifice their souls to buff yours? What if it's a sacrifice to the Changebringer? What if he gives you multiple coins? Ask the Changebringer.

SAM: It's a she. Yeah, okay. Changebringer, would you like me to sacrifice the lives of innocents on this ship? (laughter)

TALIESIN: Called it.

LAURA: I just don't think it--

TRAVIS: Open your heart to her message.

SAM: There's a message in there, there's a mystery. Clearly, she doesn't want me to just willy-nilly sacrifice people, but maybe she's saying that we're going to have to make a sacrifice on this day of some sort.

LAURA: Uh-huh, that's exactly what you just asked her.

LIAM: I was just going to say.

SAM: I'm just saying--

LIAM: You have just leveled up, FCG. I think bringing some nuance and interpretation to your faith is a very important step.

TALIESIN: Yeah. Actually, I'm with this.

TRAVIS: Woo, boy. I can't wait to translate it into other languages and see what happens. (laughter)

SAM: I'm going to have to think on this. You guys talk. (laughter)

ASHLEY: Ira? Have you--

MATT: "Yes?"

ASHLEY: -- experienced the Apogee Solstice before in your lifetime?

MATT: "I've not necessarily been present here in Exandria in its time. It has some echo effects amongst the other realms, and I've made use of it in ways that it was curious. But I must say, from what I've seen and learned in even just these past handful of years, my brief interactions with Ludinus and his strange interests, it seems like it would be quite a..."

ASHLEY: Oh, that's right.

MATT: "-- quite a unique opportunity for some."

ASHLEY: Oh, oh, wait. I don't know if we've talked about this. Wait.

LAURA: We haven't told him.

ASHLEY: Do we know that who you're talking about is the same person that we met?

LAURA: Yes, we do.

ASHLEY: We do. We do know this. We met him.

LAURA: Yeah, we met him.

MATT: "Smashing."

LAURA: Can he see invisible things?

MATT: "Who?"

LAURA: Do you know? Ludinus?

MATT: "Most likely."

LAURA: Okay, that's what I thought.

ASHLEY: Shit.

MATT: "He's, by and large, one of the oldest and most powerful practitioners of magic in this mortal realm. You--"

LIAM: How old do you reckon?

MATT: "I have no idea. At least a half millennium."

MARISHA: He mentioned being around during The Calamity, maybe towards the end of The Calamity, or post?

MATT: "It seems a bit stretched for the lifespan of an elf, unless he dabbles in necromancy. Which, I mean--"

SAM: He might.

MATT: "-- then the gates fly open, but it's possible."

MARISHA: He's got a real massive grudge for the gods.

MATT: "So I've noticed. It's... adorable."

MARISHA: What do you think about the gods?

MATT: "I don't think about them."

MARISHA: Yeah, see? I mean, it's kind of the same.

MATT: "Mm-hmm."

TRAVIS: You can make out with him now, it's okay.

MARISHA and LAURA: (laugh)

LAURA: You have so much in common.

MARISHA: (laughs) Yeah. (laughter)

MARISHA: As two spiders. (laughter)

ASHLEY: I'm going to try to just, you know, grab the little--

TRAVIS: You don't want to wait for a distraction or--

LAURA: You're seriously just going to try to do it right now?

ASHLEY: Well, while they're talking.

MATT: Mm-hmm.

SAM: Do it.

MATT: What are you trying to do?

ASHLEY: I'm going to try to take his little, needle spy glass.

MATT: Okay. Make a sleight of hand check. (laughs)

TRAVIS: You're cracking open some new ones for this?

ASHLEY: No, I keep closing that for some reason, like they'll reset.

TRAVIS: Okay. Yeah, sure. That's dice lore.

LIAM: Chucks it.

ASHLEY: Okay. 20.

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: 20? Okay. As he's leaning forward, you see precisely this small, sewn pocket on the inside of the lapel. You deftly glance over and see the slightest glint of light on metal, and rapidly lean forward and withdraw it and tuck it away. Doesn't seem to notice.

MARISHA: There's no way he doesn't notice.

ASHLEY: Matches?

TRAVIS: Yeah, he's got the clout. He knows.

MARISHA: Yeah, he's fey.

TALIESIN: What was the last solstice like over in the Fey Realm? What made everybody interested in it in the first place?

MATT: "Well, the solstice, primarily-- The average solstice, as it occurs, brings with it heightened magical energy. Strange beings, mutations, and a lot of aberrations born around that time period tend to be the more dangerous and swollen of their normal selves. That's how you find some of the more unique and mythological beasts that make a name for themselves, often born in and around the solstice. But the Apogee Solstice, well, in my experience, from a fey standpoint, the sky grows brighter, the darks grow darker. For our folk and those around us, it's a night of ritual, it's a night of celebration. It's a night of indulgence in bacchanalian joys and terrors."

MARISHA: Oh, dark. That's dark.

TALIESIN: How old is the red moon?

MARISHA: Well, we know that it didn't appear in the sky until--

TRAVIS: It's a post-Calamity, right? LAURA Yeah.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MARISHA and LAURA: Pre-Calamity.

MATT: No, far pre-Calamity.

LAURA: Pre-Divergence?

MATT: No, Ruidus. (laughs)

TALIESIN: No, Ruidus was--

MATT: No, Ruidus has been around since around The Founding.

LIAM: The Founding, yeah, because our theory is if it's a god cage holding two gods that no one's ever heard of, then that's long before The Calamity.

TALIESIN: It's way before.

TRAVIS: Okay.

LIAM: It's from the beginning. That's the beginning.

TALIESIN: I was just trying to put this together.

TRAVIS: The Adam and Eve of gods. They're going to make a bunch of more.

LAURA: Huh?

SAM: So if we set down, do we take the vehicle and drive close to do a scout?

TRAVIS: I guess. It's pretty loud, but yeah, I think so.

LAURA: Oh, that's right, it is pretty loud.

SAM: You can get close enough to ditch it and go on foot. I mean, just to make it little--

LAURA: Then we have two teams?

TRAVIS: It's a small group.

LAURA: Is that what we're looking at? A sky team and a ground team?

TRAVIS: Well, it feels like whoever's on the ship that's going to do that needs to either have some fly or something or to be able to have it cast on them, but also an ability to communicate. But it's probably one person on the ship, right?

LIAM: Right. I mean, Ira and Xandis is one duo that makes sense, because how do we get them out of there?

LAURA: Yeah, but Ira could be--

LIAM: -- I know. I'm trying to think how you fly that ship in and not sacrifice anyone on board.

MARISHA: Well, are we thinking the ground team is going to come back after the scout, or once we're in, we're in?

LIAM: Do we have time for a scout or are we right on top of it?

SAM: We have a whole day. We have a whole day.

LAURA: Well, we've got half a day to get there.

LIAM: Half a day to get near it.

TRAVIS: True.

LIAM: Near half a day to get there and park and then travel to it.

TRAVIS: We're going to get to it, the ground team, if they can get in, if they can get eyes on your mom and on Planerider Ryn are going to be like, "Yes, I need more time, hold."

MARISHA: "We got her." Yeah.

TRAVIS: Or like, "I don't see her."

SAM: I think we still have to do that, though. We still have to send in a ground team, because otherwise, we're all flying in. That seems crazy.

LAURA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Yeah, we're not doing that. For sure.

LAURA: So, really, what it's going to be is--

SAM: We should go in by ground.

LAURA: Either you or me--

SAM: To send?

LAURA: We split up.

SAM: I think what the Changebringer was telling me was to stay on the ship.

TRAVIS: Really?

SAM: Well--

LAURA: How are you going to fly off?

SAM: I have a little propeller.

LAURA: Does that really work?

MARISHA: We need a healer.

LAURA: Because I feel like the only time it works is if, you know--

TRAVIS: Try it right here. Can you hover?

ASHLEY: Give it a try...

SAM: (propellers whizzing)

MATT: Makes a cool noise. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Two horsepower.

MATT: Yeah, you don't fly. You haven't tried slowing a dissent, but it doesn't seem to do much at the moment.

SAM: I could fashion some sort of parachute. We have enough time to make one.

MATT: "What is the issue here at hand we're discussing?"

MARISHA: Okay, so, catching you up real quick, here's what we're thinking. Ground team, go in, get Imogen's mom, also get Planerider Ryn.

LAURA: Super important.

MARISHA: She's a little bit petrified, and has been made an example of and there's a big statue in front of the Malleus Key. So we want to get her because--

LAURA: Where everybody can see her.

MARISHA: Yeah, because there are other people who are trapped in other dimensions. So if we don't get her, then they might be stuck there forever in the Fire Plane. Anyway, we get them and then we fly the boat in, either super low, super stealthy, through the canyons, smash it into the Malleus Key. We got a super bomb made by Imahara Joe. Then also maybe some other things, or we'd position the boat over top of the Malleus Key and we kill the brumestone and let it go boom.

TRAVIS: This motherfucker better not betray us. We just gave him the whole thing. (laughs)

SAM: We need Xandis on board to fly it or no? Ashton, you studied how to fly it, right?

TALIESIN: I know how it works. I'm not probably great at it yet, but I understand. I was more trying to figure out how brumestone works.

SAM: Also, Fearne, didn't you study it?

ASHLEY: Yes, yes I did.

MATT: "So who's going to stay behind to be this proverbial sacrifice?"

LAURA: That's what we're talking--

LIAM: We're trying to figure out right now.

MARISHA: I think we could do--

TALIESIN: I can't fly, but I can take a hit.

ASHLEY: I can fly--

LAURA: Can't communicate with us from far--

ASHLEY: -- the boat. But we can't communicate this way.

LAURA: So either FCG or I have to stay.

SAM: So why don't you and I stay? Can you get us? If we jumped off, could you slow our descent?

LAURA: You could Polymorph.

TALIESIN: You might become useful--

ASHLEY: Yes, I could Polymorph.

SAM: Yeah.

ASHLEY: Thank you. I forgot this is a new thing that I can do. I could figure it out.

SAM: Okay.

ASHLEY: I could figure it out. We'd be fine. We'd be totally fine.

SAM: Or you two could stay. Either way.

LIAM: I have an argument for Ashton to be on the ground because he helps us stealth around.

TRAVIS: I'm on the ground.

SAM: I'm terrible at stealth.

LAURA: That's true.

LIAM: But you're magic in an emergency, you're a good emergency--

SAM: Sure, but we're going to be coming.

TRAVIS: Yeah, we're definitely not--

SAM: We're going to fly in.

TRAVIS: -- in consideration for this skyship.

TALIESIN: No, that's fair.

TRAVIS: Neither are you, right?

MARISHA: I don't think so.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MARISHA: I don't know what I could do in the skyship.

TRAVIS: So it's between you y'all four.

TALIESIN: I mean, I think it is the two of you. There's nobody else it can be.

LIAM: We also need a plan for moving Ryn-- in a manner that she will not break.

MARISHA: Beefy boys.

LAURA: So we need beefy Ashton.

LIAM: Well, yeah, I was thinking Ashton or you.

ASHLEY: It's the strength.

TRAVIS: Let's not count out the age over here, okay?

LIAM: Lifting things.

TALIESIN: That's why we have the hole.

LAURA: I don't have a lot of power there.

LIAM: No?

TALIESIN: Put it in the hole.

SAM: I can help you fly--

LAURA: But, Ira, how strong are you?

SAM: -- with magic.

TALIESIN: Anybody can take the hole.

ASHLEY: Oh, great.

SAM: Guide you and stuff.

ASHLEY: Okay, okay.

MATT: "I can get around all right. In what regard are you asking?"

LAURA: Just if we needed help picking up a giant stone pillar.

MATT: "I could certainly help, but my skills lie in other avenues."

MARISHA: Ira, it might be very useful if you could potentially help us dismantle this Malleus Key if the skyship plan fails or having a--

MATT: "Oh, I'd be very interested in--"

MARISHA: You're not going to betray us, are you?

MATT: "Why would I?"

LAURA: (laughs)

MARISHA: Oh, you know.

TALIESIN: I can think of a few reasons why I would.

MATT: "Of course, you can't trust me."

TRAVIS: That's fair.

MATT: "But what options do you have?"

SAM: Yeah.

LAURA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: I am weirdly comfortable with not trusting somebody.

LIAM: Can I get a vibe of Ira checking out his fey bod, what his strength is compared to my super average 10?

MARISHA: He's fricking made of sticks.

MATT: He's much stronger than you.

LIAM: Much stronger.

MATT: Not massively, but strong.

LIAM: Yeah, I'm not strong, I'm small.

MATT: Yeah, tensile fey strength.

TRAVIS: And, Ira, you know, not to get too inside baseball. Great game, played on a remote island. If you weren't with us and if the skyship wasn't going to crash down and make this big fucking commotion, what would your plan be, just in case something goes awry?

MATT: "Oh, I'd probably try and find a way to rapidly sneak in, find out where the basis of all of its power sources are and destroy them all at once before anyone knows any better."

TRAVIS: I like it. That sounds good to me.

MATT: "But they have seemed to have adjusted some of their setup. But, that's where improvisation comes in."

TRAVIS: The only other part of this we haven't talked about, because it feels like it'll be incredible if we get that far, is getting out.

MARISHA: Yes.

SAM: I mean, we can't. We can't.

TRAVIS: For the Changebringer.

SAM: We just can't plan that far ahead.

MATT: "I can take one with me."

SAM: It's a waste of time.

MARISHA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: (laughs) Just acknowledging it for us, so we don't go, "Oh yeah."

MARISHA: Maybe we could stash the crawler nearby.

TALIESIN: Worst case, we also, if it's about to go boom, we do have a portable hole.

MATT: "I can make a couple of quick jaunts with one other."

TALIESIN: Not bad either.

LIAM: Maybe somebody ask this tall king, can you tell us-- Can you do anything about Ryn's petrification?

MATT: "Oh, that is beyond my--"

SAM: All right, all right.

TRAVIS: Good ask.

MATT: "-- realm of expertise."

LAURA: We can get back to Nana Morri, though. She can help. She already said she could.

ASHLEY: She could probably help.

LIAM: Yeah. I just--

ASHLEY: Yeah.

LIAM: She would be a quick exit out of here--

LAURA: Yeah, she would.

LIAM: -- if we could wake her up.

TRAVIS: If this is the big HQ here, maybe they'll have, I don't know, teleportation circles or vehicles--

LAURA: That's right, or maybe--

TRAVIS: -- or other things inside or below.

LAURA: Maybe the Voice of the Tempest might have some abilities to get in and out. I mean, we're meeting them there. We didn't even--

TRAVIS: Yeah.

LIAM: You see any trees in your dream?

MARISHA: Is she personally coming? Or is it just her crew?

LIAM: Possible, but not 100%. We could check in again.

LAURA: Don't you think someone with her power would have the ability to wake up Ryn?

TALIESIN: I feel like Ira would come.

LIAM: Probably.

SAM: But not remotely.

LIAM: Not remotely.

MARISHA: But perhaps other Ashari.

MARISHA: Also, have we called them?

SAM: Yeah, we did yesterday.

LIAM: We got a message through a seed.

MARISHA: Right, but don't we need to follow up and be like--

SAM: We could.

LAURA: Yeah, we need to follow up today.

MARISHA: Okay.

LAURA: Probably once we land.

TALIESIN: And have a sense of things.

SAM: All right, plan set.

TALIESIN: All right.

LAURA: How are we--

SAM: Let's go!

LAURA: What is the sneaky team doing? How's the sneaky team getting down?

SAM: That's for y'all to figure out--

ASHLEY: Who's sneaky team?

SAM: -- when you get down there.

ASHLEY: Sneaky team, sneaky team.

TRAVIS: Sneaky team is Ashton, Chetney, Orym, Laudna. Which three of y'all are on the skyship?

SAM: We're just skyship.

ASHLEY: We're skyship.

TRAVIS: Okay, and Imogen is sneaky team.

LAURA: All right.

MARISHA: I just want to point out, we're bringing no one with healing capabilities with us on team sneak.

SAM: We've got health potions galore.

TRAVIS: Health potions, health potions.

SAM: We're going to be dive bombing in right away.

TRAVIS: Yeah, and if you go down, we can also pull off your health potion and dump it in your mouth or betray you and take it for ourselves.

MATT: "If I'm staying behind on the ship with these two, I can take one of you to a place of absolute necessary timing if need be."

ASHLEY: What does that mean?

TALIESIN: Oh.

MATT: "Oh, I can grasp you within my fold and both of us can (poof) be there as soon as we need to be."

TALIESIN: I love that sound.

LAURA: Do you have--

ASHLEY: Okay.

LAURA: -- the ability to send messages?

SAM: Let me look at my character sheet.

MATT: "Very short distance."

LAURA: Ah.

MATT: "But you seem to have that ability, yes?"

LAURA: Sure.

TALIESIN: We could have an emergency healer, if we need.

MATT: "If need be, just let me know."

TALIESIN: If you're conscious.

MATT: "I'll grab your metal friend here and we'll just--"

TALIESIN: Good to know.

MATT: "-- make a grand entrance!"

TALIESIN: That's actually a really good idea.

SAM: Right?

ASHLEY: Yeah.

LAURA: So then you would--

ASHLEY: I got the ship.

LAURA: You would come with us?

ASHLEY: I'm in charge of the ship, right?

SAM: Yeah. You're the captain. I'm the first mate.

TALIESIN: Then you would turn into a bird or something, I don't know, and join us and--

ASHLEY: Fly far, far far away.

TALIESIN: Well, that's...

LAURA: Then why is Ira staying on the ship?

TALIESIN: Sure. We'll just let that--

SAM: To quick Teleport us.

LAURA: Oh, okay.

MATT: "Or I can come with you. Choice is yours."

TRAVIS: I don't know, it's been fruitless thus far, but should we try to do another thing where we look and see if any dreamwalkers are watching us right now like we've watched them?

SAM: Just like a perception check?

TRAVIS: We've made 'em do something before. It doesn't usually work, but just for shits and giggles.

LAURA: If my circlet that I'm wearing is making me impossible to scry on, that's not the same as what the dream...

MATT: Make a wisdom check for me, if you don't mind.

LAURA: Oh. Okay, wait. Wisdom check. I'm not very wise. Seven.

MATT: Seven. Eh. (I don't know) (laughter)

LAURA: Oh, that's a seven.

MATT: You don't fully understand the details of the powers that you have, though you're beginning to grasp them more and more how people have peered in or you've peered in on individuals. It feels instinctual, and you're uncertain as to the true nature of what creates that tether, that connection.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: You do sense in binding with the circlet that it does seem to keep such tethers out.

LAURA: Okay. All right.

TRAVIS: Only other thought, in case your mom comes around or if she's selling us out, do you want to reach out and give her a false lead? Like say either A, we'll be there in a couple days just to throw her off or B, maybe act like you're coming solo, and if you really wanted to find her, where could you locate her inside?

LAURA: I can try. She might be able to see through it, what with everything that we've given her so far, but. I could try.

TRAVIS: Your call, of course.

LAURA: I have another question about the circlet.

MATT: Yep.

LAURA: If-- Wait, this could be awesome. Wait, if the circlet keeps you from having people talking to you telepathically without you wanting them to.

MATT: Mm-hmm. I'm going to the-- piece of equipment right now.

LAURA: If I try to drop my mental walls, do I hear everybody? Do I hear all the thoughts around me still, or--?

TRAVIS: Ooh!

LAURA: Or is it empty?

TRAVIS: Because you usually can't do that around lots of people.

MARISHA: Whoa!

MATT: If you open your mind?

LAURA: You know how all the time I'm blocking all the buzz out, right?

MATT: Yes, yes.

LAURA: Constantly.

LIAM: Does the circlet do that?

LAURA: If I stop mentally actively doing that, do I hear people still? Or does the circlet keep it away?

MATT: For the first time in a long time--

TALIESIN: Oh!

TRAVIS: Ooh!

MATT: -- there is a restful silence that comes across your mind.

TRAVIS: Oh, shit!

TALIESIN: Welcome to Tylenol.

TRAVIS: That opens up a bit.

MARISHA: That's crazy.

TALIESIN: Magic acetaminophen.

LAURA: (gasps)

ASHLEY: You don't know what I'm thinking right now.

LAURA: I don't.

SAM: It's probably something gross.

TRAVIS: Stupid. (laughter)

TALIESIN: Get it all out right now.

LAURA: I can probably guess, but. (gasps)

ASHLEY: Wow! How does that feel?

LAURA: (laughs) That is pretty amazing.

MARISHA: It means after this we're going clubbing!

LAURA and SAM: (laugh)

LAURA: Wow, okay. That's great. Then, okay, yeah, so I could probably do Open Mind and it wouldn't be as painful to do.

SAM: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

LAURA: Amazing, all right.

TRAVIS: What other prep? Who do we need to talk to, check in with? We're a half day-- We've been flying for about a half hour, an hour?

MARISHA: Did you still want to talk to Xandis?

MATT: Yeah, I'd say with conversation, you have a handful of hours before you--

TRAVIS: Oh, yes.

MARISHA: And give him a bit of a heads-up.

TRAVIS: I got this. No problem.

SAM: We're just going to pull him off the ship, though.

TRAVIS: 100%, but I'm going to...

SAM: Hmm...

LIAM: Yeah, will Xandis stay behind with you two and Fearne?

TRAVIS: Yeah, there's no point, right?

ASHLEY: Well, we'll come with you.

SAM: No.

LIAM: -- or carry.

SAM: I think we...

LIAM: You don't think you want the person with lots and lots of experience?

SAM: She learned.

TALIESIN: Yeah, that's not--

ASHLEY: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Okay.

ASHLEY: What, what?

TALIESIN: I'm not fighting it, no.

ASHLEY: It's not what? Are you going to challenge--

TALIESIN: I'm embracing chaos. I'm embracing chaos.

ASHLEY: -- my boat skills?

SAM: What do we do when we jump off the ship? We're going to have Xandis with us.

LIAM: Right.

TALIESIN: I'm not going to--

LAURA: Oh, that's right--

SAM: In the belly of the fight?

LAURA: Yeah, no, no.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

LAURA: Xandis isn't a fighter.

MARISHA: Well, let Chet talk to him.

LAURA: Are you, Xandis?

MARISHA: Let's see what--

MATT: Xandis is--

ASHLEY: Talk to 'em.

MATT: They're back behind the wheel. "Sorry, I can't hear you through all the wind. What's going on? You said my name?"

TRAVIS: Listen, I just wanted to give you a little insight into what's going on.

MATT: "Sure."

TRAVIS: Lord Eshteross, boy, he made us rich, filthy rich. In fact, we're going to be coming into a few other airships after this.

MATT: "Oh, really?"

TRAVIS: Yeah. We're going to start a--

MATT: "Congratulations."

TRAVIS: Thank you. So I was hoping--

MATT: "That's wild."

TRAVIS: -- maybe you might be interested in overseeing that fleet, but before we do, (sighs) we got to scuttle this one. It's just kind of becoming obsolete, and I know you might be very fond of it, but here's the deal. We're going to be scuttling it in a strategic location to set us up for an advantageous enterprise after this. You can either be a part of that scuttling effort, which is going to be fairly high-adrenalin, or we could let you off of the ship and you can watch from afar if it's too emotional for you.

MATT: Make a persuasion check.

TALIESIN: Wow.

MATT: (laughs)

TALIESIN: That was a rollercoaster.

TRAVIS: I don't know what I was saying, okay.

MATT and LAURA: (laugh)

TRAVIS: (yelps) No, yep... Five. No, 15. That's a four and a 14, five.

LAURA: Wait, what?

TRAVIS: No.

TALIESIN: No.

TRAVIS: That's a perception check.

MATT: Yeah.

SAM: Oh my god.

MATT: Why'd you have advantage?

TRAVIS: Because I'm looking at perception, which is not that. Persuasion is down here.

MATT: Roll one more dice and make that be your... (laughs)

TRAVIS: Sorry, guys, I stroked out.

MARISHA: It's been a long week.

TRAVIS: 13.

MATT: 13.

MARISHA: (laughs)

MATT: You look at Xandis and their--

TRAVIS: Whew!

MATT: -- their right eye twitches a little bit. "I'm sorry, are you saying you're looking to just get rid of the ship? Just say goodbye to my baby?"

TRAVIS: Yeah, pretty much. Yeah.

MATT: "For the purpose of new enterprise."

MATT: "For the purpose of new enterprise."

TRAVIS: Yeah, I mean, there are some noble pursuits in all this, but that's the boring stuff. Really it's going to be a new echelon of sky travel. Eshteross-Xandis, Incorporated.

ASHLEY: E-Z.

SAM: E-Z, Inc.

ASHLEY: EZ, Inc. I'm going to help, too. I'm going to help you through all this.

MARISHA: Nope, nope.

MATT: "I mean--"

ASHLEY: If that sweetens the deal.

MATT: "This is your boat. You can do what you want with it. Based on what I'm gleaning, we're going to a very dangerous circumstance, and based on the technicolor crazy sky stuff, it's going to be a little dangerous, right?"

LAURA: Yeah

LIAM: To put it lightly.

SAM: Sorry.

MATT: "Yes, I'm gleaning that. If there's any more information you want to give about how dangerous things are going to be it'd be great, because I have a lot of people here that I care about as part of the ship that I also got to take care of. And if we could figure that out, I mean, the ship is yours to do what you like, you own it."

TRAVIS: Yeah, they're going to be coming off regardless. We just wanted to know if you would be interested in guiding its final journey to its destination. It will be intense.

MATT: "You're asking me to go down with the ship."

TRAVIS: No, we're going to get you off the ship on the way down. That's why you can either be a part of that, guiding its expertly-navigated route to its final destination or you can watch from afar while we probably fuck it up.

MARISHA: We're going to save the world!

MATT: "Mm..."

TALIESIN: I can just put in that the ship is probably screwed either way. If we don't do this, if we do do this, we're kind of in the middle of the shit.

LAURA: Do do, oh.

MATT: "All right, that's a fair enough point. (chuckles) You did say 'do do,' which is quite the funny."

TALIESIN: Yeah, you know--

MATT: "No, also, all right. No, I mean, hm, there's the captain's duty No, I mean, hm, there's the captain's duty to go down with the ship, I suppose, but usually there's, you know, you can swim if it's a boat. This is a skyship, so it explodes when it collides."

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: "And you say you can help. How? I need assurances. I really like this life. I want to stick with it."

SAM: I don't think we can give assurances.

LAURA: Right, if--

TRAVIS: Sure we can.

LAURA: We don't know how much of a fighter you are, Xandis. If you'd rather stay at a distance and keep yourself safe as well as the rest of the crew, then I say disembark before we get--

MATT: "Let's do that one. Not a fighter."

ASHLEY: Yeah, that's a good--

LAURA: Let's do that.

TALIESIN: If you have time, just, you know, help this one--

LIAM: Yeah, maybe help Fearne brush up.

TALIESIN: -- have her shit together.

MATT: "Yeah, are you piloting this?"

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MATT: "Take the wheel for the next hour. I just want to have a look at this."

ASHLEY: Just to sort of, okay, great.

TRAVIS: Nice.

SAM: Learner's permit.

ASHLEY: But what would I need?

TALIESIN: Check your mirrors.

ASHLEY: What's the best... Just to make sure that I'm the best person for this job, do we know what it would entail?

TRAVIS: Okay. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Good indicator.

ASHLEY: So I have...

TRAVIS: Good indicator! (laughter)

SAM: I'm going to be buffing. (laughter)

ASHLEY: You'll be buffing me.

SAM: Yeah. I'm going to be giving you so much emotional support--

ASHLEY: Yeah, but this is dexterities we're rolling.

SAM: -- that it will give you an advantageous--

LAURA: And just a constant Guidance.

TRAVIS: You multitask.

LAURA: Constantly Guiding.

SAM: Not just Guiding. I'll Enhance your Abilities.

ASHLEY: Okay, great, great, great, great, great.

SAM: And your emotional state so you're going to be great. You're going to be fine.

ASHLEY: We'll be great. We'll be great at this.

MATT: Slowly, it's transitioning to day as we travel and keeping that going.

LIAM: Just going to hit you with morphine an hour ahead of time.

LAURA: Yeah.

SAM: Yeah, I'll be there.

ASHLEY: We're good, we're good? Okay, all right, all right.

TRAVIS: It matters up, down.

MATT: "I mean, I've showed you the basics for the most part. I just want to make sure that, you know, (chuckles) I'd really hate for you to miss your mark."

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: "That would look bad on all of us."

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MATT: "So I'd say, yeah, take the wheel for a bit."

ASHLEY: Okay.

MATT: "Show me what you got."

ASHLEY: All right.

MATT: Go ahead and roll...

LIAM: Watch yourself.

MARISHA: Fearne, ♪ take the wheel ♪

SAM: Guidance.

LAURA: Yeah, ♪ Fearne, take the wheel ♪

MATT: Because this is a protracted period of time, Guidance, I don't think, would really help for this one,

SAM: Sure, that's fine.

MATT: Especially given the circumstance that the scenario involved here would likely not have Guidance as an option. Roll a d20 and either add your... I'll say, survival or your... Let's say dexterity.

LIAM: Or deception.

LAURA: (laughs) Or deception.

LIAM: ♪ Apogee Solstice ♪

ASHLEY: Oh, that's--

LAURA and LIAM: ♪ We do what we must ♪ because we can ♪

ASHLEY: -- not great for the first...

TALIESIN: (laughs) Wow.

MARISHA: Why haven't we--

ASHLEY: Nine, nine.

TALIESIN: Didn't even think of it, yeah.

TRAVIS: You just did.

ASHLEY: For the first roll.

MATT: All right, so you all sit back for a bit while you're discussing your plans and the ship occasionally like (rushing buzz) Xandis is like, "What? Put it by this way. But you know what? (laughs) You promised me we'd get off the ship, right? You got me off safe? All right, I'm going to take it in there. You're fine."

SAM: Whoa.

MATT: And takes the wheel back and says--

ASHLEY: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Let me just give it one other go. I got to learn how to when it's the hard stuff.

MATT: "The timeline on this--"

SAM: She's got this.

MATT: "-- is a little short on this.""

SAM: She's got this.

MARISHA: I'm kind of team Xandis.

TALIESIN: Yeah, yeah.

ASHLEY: Yeah? Well...

SAM: She's got this. Give her one more try.

ASHLEY: I got it, I got it.

MATT: "All right, one more shot. We got a... How much time we got?" Ira's looking over the edge, clutching and then leaning way too far outward from the long limbs. You're almost expecting them to either take off like a spider in a windstorm or plummet off the front as they just glance out, their head going (cracking)

TALIESIN: I'm opening the hole--

MATT: Turns back around to Xandis.

TALIESIN: -- if there's anything in the ship you want to keep and bring with us down there, let's grab it now and load up.

MATT: Ira goes, "Maybe three hours."

TRAVIS: Three hours.

TALIESIN: Three hours.

LAURA and ASHLEY: Three hours.

ASHLEY: We got three hours.

MATT: All right, then. "For next hour, let's try this again."

SAM: I Enhance her wisdom ability. I'm going to cast Enhance Ability on her.

ASHLEY: Okay.

LAURA: But now you're going to waste that and it's--

MARISHA: But then it's going to go away.

ASHLEY: Same fucking roll.

SAM: You get to roll twice.

MATT: You have advantage.

ASHLEY: Okay. I'm going to roll this one.

TRAVIS: This is an example of what it would be if we don't have an expert flying it. The rolls are...

ASHLEY: Okay. 22.

MATT: You pick it up a little better. It evens out. And you watch as the tall, slowly shifting mountain of brown and gray dust on the windy horizon is imminent within the next half hour or so before it begins to blanket the landscape in a low-strength dust storm. But as Xandis goes, "You definitely picked it up. It's better. You feel confident you can do that again?"

ASHLEY: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

MATT: "So you're saying you're aiming for a very specific target on this? Or is it just trying to crash into whatever?"

LAURA: Oh, it's a really specific--

ASHLEY: Pretty specific.

LIAM: Yeah.

TRAVIS: It's a large sinkhole.

MATT: "Okay, well, you know what? You're the bosses. You tell me what you want."

LAURA: We just don't want to kill you, Xandis.

MATT: "I don't want to die!"

TRAVIS: (laughs)

TALIESIN: I mean, if we fail, does it matter?

TRAVIS: I mean, that's kind of why I'm making assurances, because if we fail, there are no fucking airships anywhere.

MARISHA: But you could get him out of dodge.

SAM: No!

TALIESIN: You're getting teleported. You can fly.

TRAVIS: The Nightmare King.

ASHLEY: I mean, we can maybe.

TALIESIN: You can carry somebody.

MARISHA: Nightmare King and you--

SAM: I don't want to waste the Nightmare King on some dude.

ASHLEY: Well no, I could take care of Xandis, or you know, if I--

TRAVIS: I just don't want to crash the airship into the side of the crater and miss.

SAM: We've got all kinds of buffs. I got all kinds of buffs.

TRAVIS: Okay, okay.

LIAM: If we...

SAM: We got a fucking Mote of Possibility.

TRAVIS: Oh, that's true, okay.

ASHLEY: Yeah. I have a coupon.

TALIESIN: We can spend it somewhere--

LIAM: That's just another way to do advantage, though.

TALIESIN: -- else, somewhere we could spend it somewhere a little--

ASHLEY: Just putting it out there, is it-- I mean, I feel like you have to go down and be on ground team, but having, you know, an exultant in proximity in that area that everybody knows you, is that, that's the-- That's what we want.

MARISHA: Do we still have our robes from when we were rolling around the Paragon's Call?

TRAVIS: In the hole?

TALIESIN: We should. Should be in the hole

TRAVIS: I think so.

TALIESIN: I've got a disguise kit, too.

MARISHA: I think we should disguise ourselves at the very least.

LIAM: Party noses for everyone.

LAURA: As Ruby--

TALIESIN: I've got a whole thing.

TRAVIS: Party noses.

SAM: Ruby Vanguard?

MARISHA: Yeah, we do. I don't know if they're Vanguard robes, but we do have--

LAURA: Yes, we stole three red Vanguard robes, too.

TALIESIN: Yes, we did.

LAURA: From the house.

MARISHA: Oh, that's right!

ASHLEY: Perfect.

MARISHA: All right.

TRAVIS: So we're flying it, yeah?

LIAM: What if--

SAM: I mean--

LIAM: One last idea to bring the expert with us--

TRAVIS: Yeah.

LIAM: -- into a hotbed of danger, I understand that. What if you guys have the hole with the vehicle in it?

TALIESIN: Will the vehicle fit in the hole?

SAM: Can we give it to Xandis when we land?-

TRAVIS: I think we asked about that.

MATT: Vehicles are probably not going to fit in there. It's a little large.

SAM: I know I'm fighting against the Xandis thing, but the Changebringer said to bring someone on to sacrifice, so I'm okay with it.

TRAVIS: (laughs) The wild winds of interpretation blown again.

SAM: I mean, why am I fighting against it, right? That's what the Changebringer said to do, so I'm okay with it.

MARISHA: Skeleton crew--

TALIESIN: This is a wild ride.

MARISHA: -- it's still very good for you to know how to fly the ship if we let everybody else land.

ASHLEY: Yes. For sure, for sure.

SAM: Sure.

MARISHA: So it's good to have you--

SAM: I got to go with the Changebringer on this.

MARISHA: Try to not kill Xandis, please. I like--

TRAVIS: There's plenty of things for us to mess up.

LAURA: We won't kill Xandis.

TRAVIS: We'll hedge our bets.

LAURA: Xandis is going to make it out safe.

ASHLEY: -- going to be totally fine.

TRAVIS: Nightmare King is on Xandis duty. Or will you two?

ASHLEY: Or me. We got two-- The three of us will cover Xandis.

SAM: If Xandis has a cardiac arrest--

ASHLEY: Not our fault.

SAM: -- we got somebody right here.

ASHLEY: Oh, yeah.

SAM: We can take over.

LIAM: We did say that sky team is not going to fly directly into the maelstrom. You're going to fly a little ways away to drop off Landis so that... Xandis. Landis? Michael Xandis. So that they can start hightailing it out of there.

TRAVIS: ♪ Amadeus, Amadeus ♪

LIAM: Because we can't bring you, sorry.

LAURA: No, that is what the discussion is.

MATT: "I don't want to go in, personally. Wherever you weird people are going, I'd prefer to stay a ways back and excitedly celebrate when you come back, maybe with another ship, I guess."

SAM: We got a whole night to figure out some other stuff, too. Maybe I can try to make a parachute so he can pop off a couple miles out or something. We'll figure it out.

TRAVIS: Do we have all night? I thought it was today.

LAURA: It's tonight.

SAM: Cool, cool, cool.

MARISHA: It starts tonight or tomorrow.

MATT: Tonight or tomorrow.

LAURA: We're not sure.

MATT: You don't have the specific timing of it. You just know that it's coming soon.

LAURA: Yeah.

MARISHA: All right.

LIAM: The only reason I bring that up is that the downside is that sky team is going to be lagging behind. Also, we don't really have an exit strategy.

TRAVIS: No.

LAURA: No. We have talked about that.

LIAM: Which, we still have to do this. We just have to do it.

SAM: We just have to do it.

TALIESIN: If we do it right, then exit strategy might just be recover--

TRAVIS: ♪ Do do it, do do it. ♪

TALIESIN: -- and breathe deep and make our way out. We may just not get chased out--

MATT: ♪ Makin' our way ♪

TALIESIN: -- if we do it right.

LAURA: No way. We're going to get chased out.

TALIESIN: I know we're going to get chased out.

TRAVIS: ♪ I got my moxie! ♪

SAM: All right! And go!

MARISHA: Okay, we know we're going to dock. We know we're going to let half the team off, and ground team--

SAM: Let's do it now.

MARISHA: Skeleton team. Well, are we there yet?

TRAVIS: No, we're three hours away. Two and a half hours away.

MATT: Yeah.

SAM: We can be there, though.

MARISHA: We can be there.

LIAM: Let's just-- talk like this for three hours.

SAM: Yeah.

MATT: Yeah, if you don't mind.

MARISHA: Also, we can't forget that there was the pulsing every minute, on the minute.

MATT: Some sort of dispelling energy.

SAM: Dispel Magic thing.

ASHLEY: Oh that's right.

LAURA: Which will probably cause the ship to crash because it dispels the stones, probably.

TRAVIS: We don't know how--

SAM: But it was pretty localized, wasn't it?

LAURA: How far out did the--

TRAVIS: Radius?

LAURA: The radius of that?

MATT: It seemed to be pretty much just the interior of the sinkhole.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: You're not certain the power or scope of what it's capable of doing, you were just warned.

TRAVIS: So when you're flying, you got to get above it instead of coming in at it.

SAM: Sure.

TRAVIS: Because if it kills it, it'll just nosedive.

LAURA: You just got to go above and, thunk!

SAM: Tell that to Xandis. He's doing it.

TRAVIS: Yeah, and so--

LAURA: Xandis is not doing it.

MATT: They're doing it.

TRAVIS: They, thank you.

LAURA: Xandis just said he didn't want to do it.

ASHLEY: Excuse me!

SAM: Oh, you're doing it now?

ASHLEY: Yes, I'm the captain now, of this ship.

SAM: Okay, just let it be known--

MARISHA: Wait, what?

SAM: I am team--

MARISHA: I thought it was the opposite!

LIAM: We've got two--

TALIESIN: This is all I wanted.

LAURA: That's what this guy just said!

SAM: You were pro bringing Xandis the whole time, and then I flipped, and now you flipped!

LAURA: Then he said no.

LIAM: No, I didn't!

LAURA: We're going to drop Xandis off.

SAM: That's not the plan!

LIAM: I did not say that.

ASHLEY: He wanted to be dropped off.

LIAM: You just misunderstood me, 'Mogen. I want to land--

MARISHA: 'Mogen?

LIAM: I'm not the first person to say that. 200 or 300 feet away so that Xandis can start running, not a quarter mile away.

LAURA: No, 200 to 300 feet away is still dropping him off before you crash land into the thing. That is dropping him off.

MARISHA: I think he goes down with the ship, and then you guys get him out of dodge.

LIAM: You set it in a direction and then leave, and know that it is plummeting at the target.

MARISHA: Oh, like "Speed" with Keanu Reeves? Really good movie.

ASHLEY: Such a good movie.

TALIESIN: That was a good play.

MARISHA: Is that what you're kind of talking about?

LIAM: Yeah, I wasn't thinking anyone was going to ride down into the hole. You're just going to be like, ope!

SAM: No, no, we're going to jump off at some point before we hit, yeah.

LIAM: And then swing away a ways and drop off Xandis and then start heading in to help.

MARISHA: Y'all are going to have to be on that ship and make sure it plummets directly.

TRAVIS and MARISHA: You got to guide it down.

SAM: We're going to start the dive and jump off.

MARISHA: Moments before it hits.

SAM: Moments before!

LAURA: Okay, so Xandis can jump off?

SAM: Like we're in an elevator that's falling, but you jump right at the last second.

MARISHA and ASHLEY: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

LAURA: Except Xandis will have to jump as soon as the elevator starts going down.

SAM: Yeah, I know.

ASHLEY: But we're not doing this situation. We're doing this situation.

LIAM: We're talking about Fearneagle--

ASHLEY: Yeah.

LIAM: -- carrying Letters and Xandis off of the plummeting ship.

SAM: Or are we going to have Spider-Man with us?

ASHLEY: We also have Ira.

MARISHA: Who can Dimension Door.

LAURA: Spider-Man's going to take Xandis.

SAM: Spider-Man can take Xandis.

ASHLEY: Then we're going to figure something out.

SAM: Yeah, she's going to take me.

LAURA: Or Fearneagle can take Xandis, and Ira can--

ASHLEY: Vice versa, yeah yeah yeah.

SAM: Yeah, whatever.

ASHLEY: Ira could take--

SAM: I'll just propeller down.

ASHLEY: -- you down to go to heal.

TALIESIN: So as long as those runes are active, that thing can plummet like it weighs exactly what it should weigh.

TRAVIS: And just so it's said, who is the body man on Xandis?

TALIESIN: I'm also going to point out--

LAURA: That's what we're trying to figure out.

LIAM: Yeah, we shouldn't leave them.

SAM: We have two options, so we're okay.

ASHLEY: It'll be me or it'll be Ira.

SAM: Yeah.

TALIESIN: I'm also going to point out, because I think this is how it works, is that the anti-magic field, it could make it drop. It could make it fly up. I don't know if it cancels out the stone.

SAM: We just established it's a local thing. Probably not going to affect it.

TALIESIN: Once it gets in there--

LIAM: We believe.

TALIESIN: -- either the runes will go down and it will start to fly up, or the whole thing will shut down and it will keep dropping.

TRAVIS: Why would it fly up? Because of the brumestone?

LAURA: The brumestone's going tp be dispelled, basically, once that anti-magic hits.

TALIESIN: Maybe.

ASHLEY: Maybe.

MATT: "It's my experience with these sorts of ships, the brumestone, part of what keeps it aloft and accelerating is the input of arcana. So if it's disabled, it'll just stay in place without weight put on it, and with the weight of the ship, it's probably going to sink."

TALIESIN: I would've, yeah. I knew that, clearly.

MARISHA: The only other thing is we don't fully know how--

TRAVIS: The only other thing.

MARISHA: Yeah, that's it. One last thing.

LAURA: One last problem.

TALIESIN: Man plans, the gods laugh.

LAURA: No big deal.

MARISHA: It seems like this Malleus Key, it's got the little tuning fork situation, and it's got the little spark, little...

ASHLEY: Oh, that's right.

LAURA: Prod.

MARISHA: Taser thing.

TRAVIS: Why are you poking me?

LAURA: Cattle prod.

TRAVIS: Because you know I have cattle prod experience?

MARISHA: Uh-huh.

LIAM: Yep.

MARISHA: We can only assume, and I guess we'll all find out, that the moment that the Apogee Solstice hits, they're going to want to blast that fucker up to the moon to dispel the gate around the moon.

LAURA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Goddamn.

LIAM: God plans, Predathos laughs.

MARISHA: I don't have a point to that. Just stating.

TALIESIN: No, it's good to say it out loud.

SAM: None of us have points.

LAURA: The only other thing is ground team.

MARISHA: The only other thing.

TRAVIS: Yep.

LAURA: What is the plan there? Just literally walk up and start traveling down the hole?

SAM: Y'all have hours to figure that out as you go. Look, the light is changing. We are there, people!

LAURA: Oh god.

MATT: The dust storm finally reaches you on your trajectory.

TALIESIN: Everyone got their hankie?

MATT: The clouded, thick, gray brown storm that surrounds the exterior makes it hard to see anything beyond about 30 or so feet.

SAM: I'm going to turn on my eyeball wipers.

MATT: Xandis puts their goggles on as well. "Don't worry, got these things to pierce through for such bad viewing-ship. I can keep an eye out there. I just have to go back and forth from the controls to the front a few times." Xandis starts running back and forth and keeping tabs. "All right. When should we drop off the rest of the crew?"

SAM: Now, right? We're a couple hours out, right?

LAURA: Stop it!

TALIESIN: Ira, what do you think?

MATT: Ira's been keeping an eye out, reaches into his coat and goes...

SAM: Uh-oh.

TRAVIS: Oh shit.

LAURA: What is that? What?

SAM: He needs the eyeglass to know how far away we are.

ASHLEY: What's wrong?

TRAVIS: Really? (laughter)

MATT: "I seem to have misplaced something."

ASHLEY: What?

MARISHA: Oh my god.

MATT: "I guess we're just going to wing it, aren't we?"

LAURA: Fearne!

ASHLEY: Okay. Are you looking for your--

TRAVIS: You dropped something.

MATT: You look back, and his face is right up against yours.

LAURA: I like that you still have all your bully gear on.

TRAVIS: It's game day.

ASHLEY: Your thing that you were looking through?

MATT: "Yes."

ASHLEY: I happened to find it.

SAM: Where did you find it, Fearne?

ASHLEY: It was rolling around on the deck, so I wanted to make sure that it didn't roll off.

SAM: You've got to be more careful with your belongings.

ASHLEY: You should be more careful with your belongings.

MATT: "You're a doll."

SAM: He's so forgiving.

ASHLEY: He is. It's okay.

MATT: Looks through, over the edge for a bit. "There is a cavern not far below. Perhaps that would be a safe space for the rest of your crew, and we're about an hour and a half out."

SAM: Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

MATT: Xandis goes, "All right. Let's bring it down." Eventually coming to rest on the ground, the wind still blowing past. Everyone's hair is caught askew in the blowing and the bluster. Eventually, the rest of the crew begins to gather, one by one, gathering their things, all their important elements, as they've been instructed of the possibility of the ship not returning. One by one, they disembark and take shelter within this nearby rock cavern. Xandis, as they say goodbye to the last of their crew, looks back at the rest of you. "Let's make a very strong note of where this is, because I don't want to have them stranded out here, either."

TRAVIS: Oh, sure.

LAURA: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

TRAVIS: Is where we are represented on the map that I have of the--

MATT: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Great, I'll make a mark on it.

MATT: Make a mark on the map.

SAM: ♪ Mark on the map ♪

TALIESIN: Grabbing some cannonballs.

LAURA: Can we tell the crew, if we're not back in a few days, we'll leave food for them and everything, right?

MATT: Yeah, there's plenty of materials and supplies here. You're emptying the ship, so they take all of it with them.

TALIESIN: Oh yeah.

LAURA: If we're not back in a few days, you should probably try to make your way to a--

SAM: ♪ Try to start making a way ♪

LAURA: -- to a town.

MATT: Xandis actually takes their small personal map of Hellcatch and aspects of Marquet and marks the path to the nearest city, which is Bassuras.

SAM: Nice.

MATT: "It's probably safer to go southwest to Bassuras than to go northeast through the Rumedam, because that can be very hot and dangerous before you even get to Ank'Harel or any of the surrounding cities. So just head this way. Look for-- What's your friend out there you said you know?"

LAURA: The Calloways? Who?

MATT: "In Bassuras."

TRAVIS: Imahara Joe?

LAURA: Oh, Joe!

MATT: "Look for a person named Imahara Joe." They write that down on the sheet there. "Tell them you're friends of Bells Hells, and maybe they'll put you in the right direction."

SAM: Mm-hmm.

MATT: "Otherwise, just stay safe." Goes around and gives a round of hugs to the rest of the crew. "Don't worry, I'll see you all soon enough with a bigger, shinier ship, right?"

TRAVIS: That's right!

TALIESIN: That's what I want.

TRAVIS: Hey, do you want to point out on this map about where we are at this moment, roughly?

MATT: Up here in this direction.

LAURA: There's a Werther's underneath here.

TRAVIS: Don't hurt my Werther's.

MATT: You are about here.

LIAM: That's what's in all those sinkholes.

TRAVIS: Oh shit.

MATT: This is indeed the site.

TRAVIS: I fucking--

SAM: It was right there-- in plain sight--

TRAVIS: -- knew it!

TRAVIS: There it is!

SAM: -- the whole time! I got a Werther's.

MARISHA: It was that thing the whole time?

TRAVIS: There's been a couple of those. Boop, boop, boop.

TALIESIN: I'm going to grab--

TRAVIS: Those are known sinkholes.

SAM: Gnome sinkhole?

TRAVIS and LAURA: Yes, gnome sinkholes.

TALIESIN: -- 10 feet of rope.

SAM: All right--

LAURA: Are there-- Okay.

SAM: We're going to set down, cut them loose, put them in the cave.

TRAVIS: We all know that we're going to at least set down one more time before we go in, right? Ground team isn't walking from here.

SAM: I don't know.

TALIESIN: How far is it from here?

TRAVIS: We're an hour and a half away.

MATT: "An hour and a half away. I'll take it as close as you feel is best or comfortable. Then I guess we'll put the rest of you down."

SAM: Sure.

MATT: "So just stop me when we're ready." (skyship flies) Leans back into the heavy winds of the dust storm, pushing towards your destination with Ira now cackling at the far point end of the ship--

TRAVIS: Fucking love him.

MATT: -- with the eyepiece out, occasionally looking back. (creaking bones and tendons) "A little bit to the left!" Shouting into the storm. The ship adjusts. Back keeping an eye. Just running as navigator in the middle of this howling wind.

LAURA: I wouldn't go in much further.

LIAM: No.

TRAVIS: So, a question. The ship travels at relatively what speed?

SAM: 150 miles an hour.

TRAVIS: This is the math part.

MATT: Yes, let me grab the information.

LAURA: If an airship is traveling at 150 miles an hour, and a ground team is traveling at--

MARISHA: Oh, I always hated those.

LAURA: -- 30 feet--

ASHLEY: You have a bucket--

LAURA: -- every six seconds--

ASHLEY: -- of 12 apples.

MARISHA: When will they meet?

LAURA: Yeah. I actually kind of liked those.

TRAVIS: (sinisterly) They don't! (explosion)

SAM: The doctor was his mother! That's the answer!

ASHLEY: That's the riddle.

LAURA: Oh, yeah.

TRAVIS: Because our average speed is about 35, 40 feet on foot.

LAURA: It's the mother.

MATT: So, skyship is about 10--

LAURA: Let's do that!

MATT: Normal pace is 10 miles per hour. But with winds picking up, it can go much quicker.

TRAVIS: Okay. Then the crawler moves at top speed about?

MATT: I'd say probably about 50 miles an hour.

TALIESIN: Not very quietly either.

TRAVIS: Oh, it goes faster than the airship.

MATT: It does, yeah. It cruises pretty fast.

LIAM: Except the airship's kind of floaty.

SAM: You'd have to stop 1,000 yards out, probably, right?

LIAM: Yeah.

TALIESIN: It is very loud.

LIAM: It's airship, then crawler, then the last stretch is on foot.

TALIESIN: If the dust storm stops, we have to stop driving, because that thing's real loud.

ASHLEY: How do we line up at the right time?

TALIESIN: Quick check if there's anything. I'm grabbing, if we have it, 200 feet of rope, six cannonballs. If there's anything you want to throw in the hole that's on the ship, right now is the time to do it.

MATT: Sure, make a note of that.

TALIESIN: I made pictures.

SAM: We rested, right?

MATT: You did.

LAURA: Yeah, yeah yeah yeah.

SAM: I'm going to hand out three danishes that I cooked inside my stomach last night. Who needs a little extra boost of health?

LAURA: Laudna.

TALIESIN: Laudna.

SAM: Well, you just toughened up, didn't you?

MARISHA: I toughened up a little bit, but I'm still a living piñata.

SAM: I'll give you a cherry danish.

MARISHA: Thank you.

SAM: You, Imogen, get a cherry danish.

LAURA: Ooh, cherry.

SAM: Chetney, maybe?

TRAVIS: I'm good. I'm stronk.

SAM: Orym?

TALIESIN: Actually.

SAM: Orym.

TALIESIN: Or--

TRAVIS: And I'm old.

ASHLEY: We're not going to be on ground team.

SAM: Cherry danish.

LIAM: Is it a special danish, or just delicious?

SAM: It's a special cherry danish that gives you an extra three temporary hit points when you eat it.

LAURA: Three?

SAM: Yeah.

LAURA: How long does it last?

MATT: Until your next long rest.

TALIESIN: Oh, that's not bad.

LIAM: You have one? You got a danish?

LAURA: I did. I'm just going to eat it now.

LIAM: Laudna got a danish?

LAURA: Long rest.

SAM: Yeah, three danishes. I think I can do three.

TALIESIN: I just want a piece of crust. I know it's not giving me a hit point. Mm.

MARISHA: Yeah, I'll take it now, why not?

TALIESIN: Fuck, that's good.

LAURA: This is really good.

TALIESIN: Wow.

SAM: I've been working on it. I still can't taste them, but--

LAURA: You would know.

TALIESIN: We'll work on that.

SAM: Thanks.

TALIESIN: Wow.

LAURA: I should send something to the Ashari.

LIAM: Yes, to give them our ETA.

LAURA: Yeah.

LIAM: And see if they can give us any bit of info on theirs.

LAURA: Okay.

SAM: Proficiency bonus.

LAURA: All right. Sure. I'm going to send a message to, what, Keyleth?

LIAM: Yeah, send it to Keyleth. Maybe fish for a way out for everybody. That's not important.

LAURA: All right.

LIAM: You only have so many words.

LAURA: We're, what, about--

LIAM: An hour and a half, an hour and 20 minutes.

LAURA: Hour and a half out on foot, would you say?

MATT: If you want to get that close, you can.

LAURA: I mean, if we land now and we're...

LIAM: We're going to fly a little bit further, land, crawler, then walk, so I don't know.

LAURA: A couple hours, maybe. Okay.

LIAM: Okay.

LAURA: All right.

TALIESIN: Do we want some disguise kits?

TRAVIS: In about 30 minutes, we can travel roughly two miles.

TALIESIN: Put you into some scarlet robes.

TALIESIN: Might want to chill this out a little bit.

LAURA: Yeah, put on something.

TALIESIN: All right.

TRAVIS: We're going to land half a mile out.

LAURA: We're going to land half a mile out to the north, south, what?

TRAVIS: You can travel a mile in about 15 minutes.

LAURA: Okay.

TRAVIS: Roughly, on foot. Just on foot.

LAURA: We're to the southeast?

TRAVIS: Yeah-- we're southwest.

LAURA: Southwest?

TRAVIS: We're traveling northeast.

LAURA: Okay, so we're southwest of the side. I'm going to send that message to Keyleth. We're a couple hours out to the southwest. Are we meeting up? Just going for it? Help?

MATT: That's your message. You get the response, "I'm gathering those of able body who've recovered from our last endeavor. I'll look for a tree. Let me know when you need the cavalry. Our arrival isn't quiet."

LAURA: Got it. Got it.

SAM: Good to know.

LIAM: Does that mean you have to save a little juice to--

LAURA: Send a message, yeah.

LIAM: Yeah.

SAM: There's probably no trees down there. Maybe there is. Y'all should keep an eye out.

MATT: As you've traveled, you have seen a few trees that dot the landscape here that have adapted to the drier landscape of the Hellcatch.

LAURA: Great.

MATT: Different sizes. Some kind of small, gnarled. I mentioned these arms reaching up to the sky.

LAURA: It's got to be thick enough for people to come through, that's the requisite?

MATT: Yeah.

LIAM: And nothing... Did they see anything in their dreams of the location?

MATT: I think they've been focusing enough on the sinkhole that likely not to the point of making note of it, but as you approach, you can definitely keep an eye out.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: All right.

SAM: Okay, phase two?

LAURA: Phase two, land and split up.

SAM: Sure.

TALIESIN: Last call for things in the hole.

MARISHA: Let's pull out our robes.

LAURA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Our robes.

LAURA: All right. We've got three of the Ruby--

MATT: The Ruby Vanguard robes. All right, who has the Ruby Vanguard outfits on?

TALIESIN: Probably, well--

MARISHA: Should be people who look passable as mages, and then--

TALIESIN: That's not me.

MARISHA: That's not you. Then the others should be Paragon's Call.

LAURA: Right, right. Okay, so you, me, Orym?

MARISHA: Orym.

LAURA: Or Chet. Which one of you wants to be?

MARISHA: You could look like a little--

LIAM: As far as Paragon's Call or Vanguard?

LAURA: I feel like Chet's more Paragon's Call with his bloody apron on.

TRAVIS: Aw shit, do I have to take it off to blend in? I just want to let them know what's coming. (laughter)

TALIESIN: If you wanted that, you could've been on the ship.

LIAM: I'll do Vanguard.

TRAVIS: Okay.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: Ruby Vanguard, Ruby Vanguard, Ruby Vanguard, and then--

TRAVIS: Naked with the apron on.

MATT: Respect.

TRAVIS: And my hat.

LAURA: Ass cheeks out.

TRAVIS: Well, yeah.

LAURA: Nice.

TRAVIS: Can't be slowed down at the end of days.

LAURA: Don't you think the apron would chafe?

MATT: Only other option.

TALIESIN: Yeah, I'll be Paragon, I guess.

TRAVIS: Get all the Crimson Rites going. Just, shink!

LAURA and TRAVIS: (laugh)

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: Just got to get the fur out.

MATT: The Paragon's Call don't have much of a uniform amongst them more than just, you know, a handful of small symbols. For some of them, it's the amulets they keep. But they mostly just look pretty rough and tumble.

TALIESIN: I'm going to zip up my, I'm going to wear the jumpsuit like it's supposed to. So I'm going to, I'll just, yeah.

TRAVIS: I'll be invisible as long as I can.

MATT and LAURA: Okay.

LIAM: Also, point of order, we got four healing potions.

LAURA: Potions, potions! Who's got the potions?

LIAM: So I'm going to have one so I can be an EMT.

MARISHA: Medic.

LAURA: Yeah. We got a big one. Two big ones, two little ones.

TRAVIS: Yeah, you got to have one.

MARISHA: I'll take one.

LAURA: Here, take a biggie.

MARISHA: I have a disguise kit. We could do a little makeup job on our way, on the boat over before we land.

LAURA: Here Chet, take one too.

TRAVIS: Yeah, sure.

LAURA: Nope, sorry.

TRAVIS: Who's got less than 65 hit points? You have one?

LAURA: I got this one.

TRAVIS: You want two of them?

LIAM: I don't know if this is an old one or not.

LAURA: No.

TRAVIS: Are you sure?

TALIESIN: It's a baby.

LIAM: That's a baby. There were four of these, right?

TRAVIS: Laura.

LAURA: No, we bought-- Yeah, we had three of those on the table.

MATT: They'd have been separated.

LAURA: No, but--

TRAVIS: Uh-uh.

TALIESIN: Take the baby.

ASHLEY: Take it.

LAURA: Okay, I have two now, so.

MARISHA: Can we say, as we were flying over, I put on a little foundation?

MATT: Sure.

LAURA: (laughs)

MARISHA: You know, if you want to do anything.

LAURA: Some rouge, just brighten your complexion up.

MARISHA: Yes, to not look so dead.

LIAM: Like Jack Nicholson in "Batman"?

LAURA: Like Meryl Streep in "Death Becomes Her."

MATT: Yep, yep.

MARISHA: Yes. Love that movie.

TALIESIN: I'm used to patching this. I know how to patch this.

LAURA: (mimics aerosol spray)

MARISHA: I look like a tan mom.

TALIESIN: A little clay, a little sand.

MATT: All right. You get within, you said about a half a mile?

TRAVIS: I think half a mile would--

LIAM: That seems visible.

LAURA: That seems close. Half a mile would be close. We should be a mile out.

TRAVIS: It feels a little close, I think a mile is fine--

MATT: All right.

TRAVIS: -- and we could even be on this side of the mile.

LIAM: A mile out coming in, and we're still low. We've been low this whole time.

TRAVIS: As low to the ground as is possible.

TALIESIN: Keeping a fucking eye out.

TRAVIS: Flat desert. Any rolling hills or mountains behind us that we could blend in with, or is it just desert?

MATT: I mean, it's just dust storm right now.

TRAVIS: Oh, that helps.

MARISHA: Yeah, it helps a lot.

TRAVIS: Okay, so coming in low in the dust storm.

MATT: Okay. (skyship whooshing) The skyship begins to ride at a slower speed now, both because of the wind and because now that it's staying low, it has to make sure it doesn't suddenly ride up on the base of some sort of a mountain mesa or pillar. Xandis is taking it through, goggles on, horns curled back, the coat flapping, clutching the front of the wheel and intensely looking forward. You can see that half-grin, but also that occasional neck crack of anxiety as they push onward, riding the ground low until you get about that mile distance where Ira says, "The mile is upon us! Time to bring it down." (ship whooshing) (ship thuds) Dust gets carried away by the wind as the skyship comes to rest here on the floor of the Hellcatch Valley. (Xandis) "All right, so I guess we're the ones staying behind to take her home. (chuckles nervously)"

SAM: Yep. Good luck to all of you.

MATT: "Oh boy."

TALIESIN: Good luck.

LAURA: Good luck to y'all.

SAM: We'll need 10 minutes lead time to get there, so tell us when you want us to, you know... (whistles)

LAURA: All right.

SAM: If we don't see you again, sure has been nice knowing you!

ASHLEY: Don't, don't, don't do that.

SAM: Okay, it hasn't been nice to know you.

ASHLEY: Sorry. We'll see you again. We'll see you all again.

LAURA: We'll see you.

ASHLEY: We'll all be fine. It's going to be great.

SAM: I don't think I've ever seen you nervous, Fearne.

TRAVIS: We've got the element of surprise.

ASHLEY: I'm not nervous! I'm totally not nervous. I'm totally fine.

TRAVIS: We're working in concert.

LAURA: Yeah.

SAM: You're sweating.

LIAM: Orym still runs over and hugs Fearne's goat leg. We'll see you soon.

ASHLEY: Don't-Don't-Don't do anything stupid.

LAURA: Oh, this is all stupid.

ASHLEY: I know, I know. Just, if something goes wrong, just run, you know? You don't need to be any heroes.

MATT: You can see some of the bright colors and the wildfire-like arcane lightning is now sparking through the storm, causing the various dark shadows beyond to light blue and purple and green and all sorts of technicolor flashes. As you get closer and closer to the shifting nexus point of the leylines this side of Marquet, all brewing into one final flashing core not far north from where you stand, the dust continues to keep a very chaotic and very unexpected future before you. As Xandis adjusts their goggles, "Well, not to jump off of your start there, but I look forward to getting back together on... I get the sense there's probably not much of an enterprise around this corner, but whatever it may be, Eshteross said a lot of great things about you in our correspondences, and in the time I've been with you, you all seem like pretty okay people, so... I think what you're doing is pretty important, and I'm happy to be a part of it. So, I guess buy me a drink when we get out the other side, eh?"

LAURA: We're lucky to have you on our side, Xandis.

MATT: "Don't die."

LAURA: You either.

SAM: We're not going to... You're going to be fine.

MATT: "All right."

LAURA: All right. (laughter)

MATT: "Well, good luck. May whatever you pray to or do not keep watch on you or just stay focused ahead." They take a swig of their brown jug once more, and then step over behind the wheel and just focus. Ira creeps over to the rest of you. "Well, this is exciting. Just be ready for anything."

LAURA: Yeah. Really wish we had Ira--

TALIESIN: It is a fucking adventure.

LAURA: -- on our--

TALIESIN: I'm going to go get the car ready.

TRAVIS: Can I lean around Ira and look at Xandis? Xandis!

MATT: "Yeah? What?"

TRAVIS: Look, I'm real old. Been around for a long time. This is going to be one for the history books. We're lucky we get to make a difference. You got this. That's it.

MATT: "Appreciate that."

TRAVIS: Okay.

LAURA: It's going to be fine.

MARISHA: Ira!

MATT: "Yes?"

MARISHA: Don't betray us.

MATT: (chuckles darkly)

MARISHA: You're an inspiration. I like you a lot. All right, bye!

TRAVIS: Wait, wait, wait, wait. Did you want to give him a good luck...

MARISHA: No, no, no!

TRAVIS: Too obvious? Are you sure?

MARISHA: What? No!

TRAVIS: Now's the time.

MARISHA: Oh my god!

TRAVIS: What if you don't get another chance?

MARISHA: Don't make it weird!

ASHLEY: Good luck what?

TRAVIS: I'm sitting there holding her arm. Ah! (laughter)

TRAVIS: (schlorping)

LIAM: Letters.

SAM: Yeah?

LIAM: Changebringer be with you.

SAM: And also with you.

MARISHA: (laughs)

TALIESIN: My life has been so fucked since I've met you. Thank you.

LAURA: Why are we saying goodbyes like this is our goodbyes? This is not our goodbyes.

TRAVIS: These aren't goodbyes. These are pump-ups.

ASHLEY: No, it is--

TALIESIN and ASHLEY: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

LAURA: I have ultimate faith in y'all. I know we're trying to save the gods or whatever. I could give a shit less about them.

ASHLEY: I don't even know them, you know?

LAURA: Yeah.

SAM: She doesn't mean it.

TALIESIN: Just in case though, Fearne.

MARISHA: What?

TALIESIN: I go around and give Fearne a big hug. And then I reach into her pockets. (cheering) (laughter)

MATT: Sleight of hand versus perception!

LIAM: Let's go!

MATT: I love it.

ASHLEY: Perception for me?

TRAVIS: I was wondering.

ASHLEY: 23.

TALIESIN: Fuck. Mm!

MATT: You sense his hand wandering into a pocket.

TRAVIS: Let it happen.

ASHLEY: What are you looking for?

SAM: That's not a pocket!

TALIESIN: Something personal and irreplaceable.

LAURA: That's my pouch!

ASHLEY: Aw, something personal and irreplaceable.

LIAM: You find a baby satyr.

ASHLEY: I am going to give you--

TRAVIS: Don't cry.

ASHLEY: -- a kiss on your head.

LAURA: Aw.

TALIESIN: Well, fuck, now that's just really hard to steal back, isn't it?

ASHLEY: Well, you asked for something... What did you ask for again? Irreplaceable?

TALIESIN: Expensive.

TRAVIS: Good hands. Good hands. Confidence, climbing.

TALIESIN: You're just fucking great.

ASHLEY: Thanks. You were, too.

TALIESIN: See you later today.

ASHLEY: Take care of everybody, please.

TALIESIN: Yeah, they'll be fine.

LAURA: We'll see you in a couple hours.

ASHLEY: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

TALIESIN: Even that one.

LAURA: Yeah.

ASHLEY: Okay, okay.

TALIESIN: Okay.

ASHLEY: This is going to be great. This is going to be great. We're doing great.

MARISHA: We're doing good. All right, everybody, bring it in! Bells Hells on three!

SAM: One, two, three!

ALL: Bells Hells!

MATT: "And Xandis!"

SAM and ASHLEY: And Xandis!

TRAVIS: Just because of the commotion... (explosion) (laughter)

TRAVIS: Quiet!

TALIESIN: All right.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: Gathering your materials that you need for this, you, together, pull your crawler from the side of the ship and set it onto the valley floor. It sparks awake, a flash of blue, crackling energy inside its energy core, and the feet come to life, (heavy thuds) adjusting its weight to hold itself in place while the front wheel prepares for the journey ahead. Thankfully, you have two very small members of your team. While this wouldn't be at optimal travel speed, you can fit one, two, three, four, five, 4 3/4 (laughs) onto it. With one glance back at the Silver Sun, the wheel picks up, skids off into the dirt as the back feet push off, sprinting deeper and deeper into the technicolor dust storm ahead.

LAURA: Does it seem like we're louder than the dust storm, or is the dust storm keeping the sound of what--

MATT: The wind's pretty loud, and the sound of the crawler is heavier at initial takeoff. Out beyond that, it's heavy footfalls grinding into it. There isn't a continuously roaring engine outside of any sort of arcane flares or kickback from the core. But you press on.

TRAVIS: Only taking this about a half mile, 3/4 at the most, and then we're shutting this down.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: Keep an eye out.

LIAM: Always.

TALIESIN: Mm-hmm.

MATT: Perception check.

ASHLEY: Oh god.

TRAVIS: Assist.

LIAM: Don't need it.

LAURA: You should just do your own, then. (laughs)

MATT: Actually, technically, because this is the dust storm, I would say do a singular roll. So just roll one dice, because you would be at disadvantage.

LIAM: That is a 25.

SAM: Ultra PRO.

MATT: 25, all right.

TRAVIS: (laughing) Ultra PRO.

MATT: All right, we will mark that as your general oracle-like eye on the horizon ahead of you as you continue.

LIAM: Listening. Okay.

MATT: You catch a couple of shadows and then pass by some rocky outcroppings, some hills or punched stone that has long sat resting within.

LAURA: Keeping an eye out for trees.

MATT: You see a tree or two that you pass by, on a smaller scale. Nothing yet that may be of the size that you're used to seeing your Voice of the Tempest traverse yet, but you do see a lot of the Haggardoe trees in here. Now that you have a ground view as you pass a couple to keep an eye on it, you can see the pale green and orange leaves that emerge in spurts at the end of some of these crooked, upward-twisting branches and these tiny little seedpods that begin to emerge in lines down the bottommost branches of the tree. That's about it. You push on until you gauge the distance is around the level of comfort you're willing to take this crawler forward. Do you just abandon it here in the middle of the valley?

LAURA: Can we hide it behind a stone? Is there a boulder or anything to hide it?

MATT: Yeah, you can lean it into a space.

MATT: You haven't encountered--

TALIESIN: Should've brought some tarps.

MATT: -- at this point, any major variations to the land yet. There were some further back there, but at this line, it's a little bit flat. But you do find one little hill or embankment to lean it up against and keep it out of sight from the direction you're traveling.

LAURA: Okay.

TALIESIN: Kicking myself for that one.

LAURA: You could use one of those capes that Nana Morri gave us. I don't think it would do much good, but it might cover the crawler from the sand.

LIAM: Doesn't that have a short shelf life?

LAURA: Just to cover it from the sand, mostly.

TALIESIN: Wait, those capes are done done?

MARISHA: They're done. It's just cloth.

LAURA: Yeah, they've been used. It's just a fabric tarp by this point.

TALIESIN: Is it big enough to give it a little cover? Nah, it probably might make it more visible. I don't know, this thing's pretty grubby.

LAURA: Okay.

TRAVIS: Yeah, if they're worth their salt, there will be a patrol, right?

LAURA: Uh-huh.

MARISHA: Because we still have one of those, right? Or did we use all of them?

TALIESIN: Actually, I got a great idea.

LAURA: We have two of them left.

MARISHA: We still have two left.

LIAM: We had three total to cover the whole party.

TALIESIN: Let's turn it over.

LIAM: So we used them all.

LAURA: Yeah, I gave one of them to the--

TRAVIS: Like it's been discarded?

LIAM: All their ability.

TRAVIS: Even if they come across it, though, they've been patrolling the area, that would be new, right?

TALIESIN: Well, sand shifts all the time. What do you think?

TRAVIS: If we need a quick escape, we'd have to flip it back over.

LAURA: Yeah, fuck it, let's just go.

TALIESIN: Yeah, that's fine.

TRAVIS: Okay.

LIAM: Ultimately, very low chance that we're going to be getting on this thing and riding out of here.

LAURA and TALIESIN: Yeah.

TRAVIS: I don't know.

MARISHA: Yeah, let's go.

TRAVIS: Planning for success.

MARISHA: The moment that we get out of the crawler--

TALIESIN: Are we?

MARISHA: -- I pull out the scry ball. I'm going to have it out the entire time as we walk close.

MATT: You got it. You're clutching it. The very faint underglow of its paleish gray-blue energy framing the bottom of Laudna's face from within the Vanguard robes that you bear. No particular directional point of light discerning immediate proximity to your target.

MARISHA: I keep it tucked a little bit as well.

MATT: Continue on for a few more minutes. You catch two things. One, out to the right-hand side, you do see a larger Haggardoe tree, one that might be functional, might be a good anchor point for the Voice of the Tempest.

LIAM: Does it have any distinctive features that could be described to the Tempest?

MATT: You see its height sits at about 15 to 20 or so feet. The heavier thicker branches that make up the spiraling, lightning-like climb of it, there's four of them. You're welcome to leave a mark upon it that you think would make it unique.

MARISHA: Oh.

LIAM: Yeah. If we get up to it, I'll carve the Ashari symbol, the--

MARISHA: The overlapping symbols.

LIAM: -- hourglass-like pattern.

MATT: You've got it. Easy enough to do. You're quick with a blade, and not the first time you've carved a symbol of any kind into a tree. So (whooshing) Zorro speed-style manage to mark an Ashari symbol into the side of this tree. Definitely a familiar anchor for someone looking for such a thing.

LAURA: Brilliant.

MATT: You feel satisfied and turn around and take a handful of feet back in the direction you were traveling before and another shadow shape, larger, catches your attention, a little bit to the left in the direction you're traveling. It looks like a hill, like a mound of some kind, and as you begin to travel past it, you begin to see more details, shapes, hard lines, like a structure almost, but a bit chaotic and oddly varied.

LIAM: So definitely a structure, but not typical dwelling that I or we would be familiar with? I point out--

MATT: Not yet. You're too far away to make out much detail beyond the silhouette of it.

TALIESIN: Is it probably big? Is that what we're looking for?

LIAM: Worth the detour? I don't know. There's some sort of structure. How far off is it?

MATT: Best you can tell, about 150, 200 feet away.

TALIESIN: That's not bad.

LAURA: Could be an outpost, though.

LIAM: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Could be a way in. Could be more better disguises.

LAURA: Mm-hmm.

TRAVIS: Is it time?

LAURA: Yeah, we definitely just put all of our disguises on.

TALIESIN: How stealthy do we want to be?

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: Is it still sandstorming around us, too?

MATT: Oh yeah.

LIAM: Yeah?

TALIESIN: So I'll hold, and just let me know when you want us to get real quiet.

LAURA: All right.

MATT: Okay. So are you just skirting around it? Are you continuing the direction you're going or are you detouring?

LIAM: I think detour?

LAURA: You want to--

TALIESIN: It's not a far detour.

LAURA: -- sneakily go over and check it out?

LIAM: Yeah. Couple of us could.

TRAVIS: You have to check it out.

TALIESIN and LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Make a group stealth check for those on the ground team, then.

LAURA: Is one of us going in solo, or all of us going towards it?

TRAVIS: I mean, the smaller the group, the easier it is.

LAURA: I think you could probably head out, Chet, and go check it out.

MARISHA: I can send in Pâté.

LIAM: This could be your solo trip.

TRAVIS: Okay.

MATT: All right. So while the four of you continue venturing on your own path into this dust storm, be sure you don't lose eye contact with the rest of your team.

LAURA: We're not going to move. We're not keeping walking without him, he's going to go check that out and come back.

MATT: Go ahead and make a stealth check for me.

TRAVIS: Okay.

MATT: I'll give you advantage on this because you are in the middle of a heavy dust storm.

TRAVIS: 23.

MATT: 23.

TRAVIS: Even more than that, 27. (laughs) Sorry.

MATT: You slowly approach this shape, this silhouette, and the closer you get, it's not a structure or a building, it's wreckage. You get closer and closer still, and you see splintered and destroyed wood and stone. You see what almost looks like a half-crumbled cathedral. Make a perception check for me. Actually, no, this would be an investigation check.

LAURA: (whispered) I do, too.

TRAVIS: Okay. Natural 19 for 24.

MATT: 24.

ASHLEY: Nice.

TALIESIN: Nice.

MATT: You get a bit closer, and glancing at this, you see elements of it scattered in different places, smaller piles. There's drag marks in the ground and all manner of footprints visible that are almost completely gone, but you can pick up from the dust storm as it's about to cover them from any sight. You can see the signs of the people who have moved through. This was a skyship--

LAURA: Oh fuck, it was a skyship.

MATT: -- that crash-landed. The cathedral and designs of it have a very particular continuous religious theme and iconography, like it carried a temple before it impacted and was left to partial ruin. It is mangled, parts of it are burned and the flames have died. It looks like the sections of it where the brumestone had been attached are either unseen or have been scavenged.

LIAM: Does it appear recent to him?

MATT: With a high enough investigation check, it looks like it isn't an ancient crash site.

TRAVIS: You said it is not or it is?

MATT: It is not an ancient crash site.

ASHLEY: Cool, cool, cool. Cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool.

LAURA: That means they might bring y'all down before you go.

ASHLEY: We might not be able to fly.

LIAM: Could it have been a Judicator ship?

MARISHA: Yeah, for Vasselheim.

LIAM: Trying to get their-- TRAVIS From Vasselheim.

LIAM: Trying to get their shit back.

MARISHA: Trying to come and do exactly what we want to do.

MATT: Do you want to continue to investigate the wreckage or are you good with the information you have?

ASHLEY: Fuck.

SAM: No problem.

TRAVIS: Yeah, I want to get a little bit closer, but I want to check the ground just in case anybody left any sort of traps as I get closer. Just want to see if there's any-- No, there's no point. It's not going to tell us anything. I'm going to go back to the group.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: Invert.

SAM: Invert.

TRAVIS: Okay. There's an airship that crashed. It doesn't look old. It's fairly recent. It looked like it had remnants of a temple on it, so maybe from-- What was that place across the sea that has all the temples and the deities and--

LIAM: Vasselheim.

LAURA: Vasselheim, that's right.

TRAVIS: Vasselheim, maybe. But if it's recent, I don't think it's a coincidence. They might have a way to shoot down something that was trying to travel here.

LAURA: Great. Should we cancel plan A and--

TRAVIS: Fuck. I think so. Because if they get hit in midair, they may not have the time to jump. They could get separated from each other. I think we got to call it.

MARISHA: Unless we make one hell of a distraction on the ground.

TRAVIS: What if it's automatic? What if it's set to target anything that's coming through here?

TALIESIN: What if it's a shield?

MARISHA: Unless they go really high? Do we see anything--

LAURA: That could be even worse.

MARISHA: I mean, I guess--

MATT: You'd have to get close and really inspect the wreckage to then discern--

MARISHA: The closer we get, we might see some sort of anti-aircraft artillery.

TRAVIS: You mean to the sinkhole?

MATT: Oh to the sink--

MARISHA: Yes.

MATT: Got you.

TALIESIN: Did you get a sense of what brought it down?

TRAVIS: I didn't. I'll be right back. (rapid skittering) I'll actually go closer this time and as I follow my footsteps, if they're still there in the sandstorm, I'll start looking really carefully in the ground and on the horizon as I get closer. I'm going to try and look for evidence of gouging or explosions or anything that might've ruptured the ship versus something that just crash-landed.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: On the exterior side without pushing in.

MATT: We'll maintain your investigation roll because it's still the same space and carrying that attention to detail throughout. It's a pretty high investigation roll. You don't see any--

TRAVIS: I would look for one other thing. If it was heavily armed or had mounts for armaments. Ours is a ship that has a couple of mounts for ballista and shit. Was this thing rolling dirty?

MATT: That's a good question. Looking through the remnants you can find, the outer edges of this ship are heavily fortified with metallic armor. You can see there are embankments and mounts along the exterior for heavy, chain-based harpoons, what look like may have been canons, but all the artillery's been removed.

TRAVIS: Yep.

MATT: It's been taken. You can see signs of battle on what elements of the deck are visible. You don't see any signs of any massive exterior explosion, any sort of detonation or weapon blast that took it down. You do see signs of battle on the deck.

TRAVIS: Which means they could've--

MARISHA: They bamfed on it.

MATT: Actually, you do see on what elements of the bottom of the ship that you can find, there are giant metal harpoons with heavy chains behind them that were jammed and splintered in from underneath.

LAURA: Oh.

MARISHA: That answers our question.

TRAVIS: But visibility, right, is on our side right now. If they jumped onto the ship, then they probably saw them coming. Maybe they were looking for this place and they didn't have the exact location like we do. We might still have surprise.

TALIESIN: We can let them know.

TRAVIS: Yeah, we should relay--

LAURA: But if that--

TRAVIS: -- and let them--

LAURA: -- wind storm lets up--

TRAVIS: Then it's over.

LAURA: It's over.

MARISHA: Also, harpoon guns only have a radius, they can only go so far, so this might just be, once again, it might just be very high altitude assault.

TRAVIS: Maybe we tell them and we let them make the choice. If the sandstorm goes down, they have to abort.

LAURA: Okay.

MARISHA: Did you pack any type of fog cloud, windy anything, druid realness?

SAM: We're not there.

MARISHA: No, I know. I'm totally (pigeon coos)-ing.

TRAVIS: Even if it was a clear--

LAURA: Yeah, you probably would have done that if you were selecting. You haven't selected for the day yet.

TRAVIS: I come back and I relay, this ship was down to clown. They were not fucking around. If you look real closely-- (laughter)

LIAM: Did you know--

LAURA: I know, he sounds like--

TRAVIS: The sandstorm will cover it in a mound. (laughter)

MATT: Oh my god.

LAURA: The wind storm, I think it's affecting his-- His voice is getting--

TRAVIS: Look, the adrenaline has helium-like effects. (higher-pitched) One of us. (laughter)

LAURA: All right. I'm going to--

TRAVIS: Flames!

LAURA: -- Send a message--

LIAM: Shit.

LAURA: -- to Fearne.

MARISHA: You have a limited amount of those, correct?

LAURA: Yes, I do. I've already used-- This'll be my second 3rd-level spell for the day.

MARISHA: Should we, before you do that, we get a little bit closer and see what else we potentially find in case there's more information that needs to be rolled up into this?

LAURA: Sure.

TRAVIS: Sure. We still do have the sandstorm. We can wait.

LAURA: Sure.

TRAVIS: Okay.

MARISHA: Okay.

TRAVIS: I relay, we keep moving forward.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

LAURA: All right.

TRAVIS: Orym and I are up front.

LIAM: They're not going to hit until we've found our--

TRAVIS: Safe zone.

LIAM: Our people anyway.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

LIAM: So they hang back for now.

LAURA: Yeah.

LIAM: More information. We need more information.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MATT: Okay. So you press on?

MARISHA: I also painted a dope-ass Cerberus Assembly symbol on it, so we're golden. (laughter)

TRAVIS: As we press on--

MATT: Wait. Oh, they're with us. We're fine. (laughter)

LIAM: Cerberus Assembly on board.

TRAVIS: If he's got perception on the horizon and the air, can I keep an eye strictly on the ground?

LAURA: Why is the Cerberus Assembly--

TRAVIS: Tripwires, plates--

LAURA: -- flying such a fucked up ship?

TRAVIS: -- anything that looks out of the ordinary in this organically blowing--

MATT: Yeah. Make a perception for me. It does not have advantage. It would actually have disadvantage given the storm.

LAURA: Oh my god, the heart rate. (gags)

TRAVIS: Investigation or perception?

MATT: Perception.

TRAVIS: Then that's just a 12.

MATT: 12, okay. So keeping an eye on the ground before you as you progress forward.

ASHLEY: If I gave up Polymorph...

MATT: You continue on for minutes more.

MARISHA: Still looking in the ball.

MATT: Yep. It isn't terribly long before you see a bright point of light--

LAURA: (gasps)

MARISHA: She's here!

LAURA: No, no, no, no, no.

MATT: -- in the direction that you're traveling.

LAURA: Oh god.

MATT: Though at an angle.

TRAVIS: (tracker beeping) (laughter)

TRAVIS: (explosion)

MATT: You also see, among the rocky mounds and bits of broken ground that push upward, the rising lip of the edge of the excavation site.

TRAVIS: Oh, I got to poop.

ASHLEY: Oh, me too.

MARISHA: I have to pee.

ASHLEY: My teeth started hurting.

MATT: You see before anybody, but the climbing edge of it along the side, you can see the rocky natural steps from the pushed up earth that has rolled back and crumbled. As the storm blows over, you can see the shapes of figures moving along the edge. You can see tents and various excavation shacks You can see tents and various excavation shacks set up around the outside perimeter, as well as large shapes walking by.

LIAM: We're there.

MATT: What do you do?

TALIESIN: What the fuck are we doing?

TRAVIS: So those things that are walking by, they are on the upper rim and edge, or are they just beyond as we start to crest? Or we haven't gotten there yet?

MATT: You haven't gotten there yet.

LIAM: We're seeing-- We're seeing a line, right?

MATT: Yeah, you guys are stepping forward and you're looking at the ground before you, and the dust storm is keeping most of it obscured, and then you begin to see the ground rise up and the outline of the edge there with a couple of--

TRAVIS: Is it worth lowering our visual profile as we get to the edge to peek? SAM We'll get hit and then we'll be like, "All right, get off."

TRAVIS: Or?

LAURA: The--

SAM: Maybe we ditch Xandis.

LIAM: Well, yeah, we've got to approach this place somehow, so we use Ash's group sneak, right?

MARISHA: Pass Without a Trace.

LAURA: Right.

LIAM: Get low and do exactly that. We try to time it so that we--

MATT: You hear behind you as you're having this conversation--

TRAVIS: Oh shit.

LIAM: No. (rhythmic rattling).

MARISHA: Crawler.

MATT: You turn around, and you see a crawler that's riding rapidly, parallel to-- Sandwiching you between the entrance of this.

LIAM: Towards us or--

LAURA: We're straight up-- We're straight up--

MATT: No, just kind of-- behind you.

LIAM: Parallel. So we're already within their--

TRAVIS: Yeah, we're in the hot zone.

LAURA: Yeah.

LIAM: Yes.

LAURA: That's okay. You're Paragon's Call. You've both got your yellow cloaks on?

TRAVIS: Yes, which would also mean that we're within the (Dispel Magic pulsing).

LAURA: Yeah.

MARISHA: Okay, all right.

LAURA: Potentially.

MARISHA: Right, right, right.

TRAVIS: Every minute.

MARISHA: Yep.

MATT: Do you guys do anything?

MARISHA: Shit.

TRAVIS: I suggest we drop.

LAURA: Act natural? Just to act like we're supposed to be here.

LIAM: But also aim for a gap with no automaton behemoths walking--

TRAVIS: Yes.

LAURA: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

MATT: The crawler sound gets louder. (rhythmic rattling) As it begins to tear through, the dust behind it kicked up, the large legs tearing into the valley floor, it gets about 60, 50 feet from you before you see the figure at the front, heavy goggles, long tattered coat with streamers of different colored materials flowing behind it. It pulls up around and does a slow arc as it rides by and gives you all a glance. I would like a group deception roll for me.

SAM: Oof.

MATT: You will have advantage because you are wearing the colors and outfits of allied figures.

LAURA: Okay. Okay.

LIAM: In a dust storm.

MARISHA: Advantage group deception.

LIAM: Natural 20.

LAURA: Fuck yeah.

TALIESIN: Thank god.

MATT: For a total of?

MARISHA: Ah, jeez Louise.

LIAM: Deception? It's probably not much--

TALIESIN: Ah fuck. Thank you. Goddamn it.

LIAM: 21.

MATT: 21?

TRAVIS: 17.

MATT: 17.

LAURA: 24.

MATT: 24.

LIAM: Yes.

MARISHA: 10.

MATT: 10.

LIAM: No.

TALIESIN: Six.

LIAM: No.

LAURA: Oof.

MATT: That's okay.

MARISHA: We passed, though.

MATT: That was two successes and then a double success on the natural 20 versus two failures.

LAURA: Sweet, sweet, sweet.

LIAM: Multipass.

LAURA: Multipass.

MATT: You watch as it--

TALIESIN: I have a negative two.

MATT: (laughs) -- cruises by. (rhythmic rattling)

MARISHA: I have a pretty high deception, too. I rolled a three and a five.

MATT: It peels back off again.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

MATT: Charging back off into the heavy storm.

LAURA: Great.

MATT: Seemingly satisfied.

TALIESIN: We're not threatening enough. They would stop and would've fucked with us.

LAURA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

LIAM: So we'll delay our movement forward until we're like little ducks in a row in a shooting gallery. We'll go between automatons because we've got to get a look in here and see what we're dealing with, yeah?

TRAVIS: I think so.

LAURA: Are there any other people around the surface, just walking around outside of the automatons or it--

MATT: Yeah, you see the shape of a handful of figures, maybe two or three people that are walking along. Two of them stop and talk for a second. You're too far away to see any details beyond the outer shape that you see of a bipedal humanoid walking past. At the lip of this storm, with the light coming through, it has this light brown glow behind them with the occasional flashes of energy, which makes it very apparent for a moment the shape as the nexus flashes are growing in more intensity and rapidity. So you see about three figures and you see two of these large shapes, one that seems to be actually stepping up from the other side before it (intense stomps) approaches over, heads towards one of the tents.

TRAVIS: Just a question. As the crawler was going by, the person that was driving it, the people that we see in the storm, is it just outlines or could we tell at least from the person that was driving it who, I guess, got the closest, do they have a shawl or something up to protect their mouth from the sandstorm?

MATT: They do. They do. The person in the crawler you saw was in the attire of Paragon's Call.

TRAVIS: Got it.

MATT: As best as you can gather from the details that you've granted in the past. But yeah, they have their face covered in a mask to prevent the dust from--

TRAVIS: We kind of do the thing.

LAURA: Right. Yeah, we--

LIAM: Yeah.

LAURA: Mm-hmm.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: We're going in.

LIAM: Yeah, we're going in.

MARISHA: Let's do it.

TRAVIS: Confidently.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: Hiding in plain sight.

MARISHA: Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

MATT: Okay. You step closer and closer. Slowly, you begin to see the details of this sinkhole edge encampment come more and more crisp into view. You can see tables and chairs. This definitely has a... Hard to tell if it's a guard post or a remnant of the excavation that's been taken. But you see a handful of tents and bits of furniture, crates, boxes that contain things you can't really make out at this distance. The massive automaton that you can now see standing a good 15, almost 20 feet tall, its round egg-like body, its heavy, thick legs looming up, its massive piston battering ram-like fists reaching down, and the front of its body, an opening (whooshes) opens up to a semi-hollow interior and it begins to pick up a couple of boxes that are on the ground and placing them inside of it before (door closing) it closes and (thumps) begins to step back over and vanish down into the sinkhole below. The second one, the one that didn't emerge is slowly walking the perimeter to the left side. So. You get closer still and you start seeing the colors of the Ruby Vanguard, the three figures that were present. They're all talking amongst themselves before (whooshes) they glance over and make notice of your approach. You see one of them puts their hand up like this, begins to step down one or two of the stones--

LAURA: (whispers) Fuck!

MATT: Glances over in your direction, and you hear a voice go, "Who are you with?"

LAURA: Miss Temult.

MATT: "What is your business out there?"

LAURA: That's above your pay grade, son.

MATT: A persuasion check.

SAM: (pants)

MARISHA: Come on, come on, come on, come on!

TRAVIS: That was good!

TALIESIN: Fuck!

LAURA: Would that be persuasion or deception? Ha ha!

MATT: I'd say that would be deception.

LAURA: Okay, good. 19.

MATT: 19.

MARISHA: Come on!

MATT: The figure gives you a look over. You all watch (whooshes) as this soft glow apparates from the inside of this pit. You're now close enough where you can see the faint (whooshes) and vanishes about 10 feet above. As it does. You see the massive automaton that's walking along the side. Its body suddenly flashes in runes and it seems to slow for a second before it picks back up again, continues to move.

TRAVIS: I cover my junk every time it flashes.

MARISHA and LAURA: (laugh)

MATT: The individual approaches, their goggles up, mask up, look at the rest of your troop. "Well, then, get to it, I guess." Take their walking stick that they had and start walking back up the side. The other two were glancing off. The quills aren't up, but they're all watching very carefully. What do you do?

TRAVIS: Keep going.

LAURA: We walk on through.

TRAVIS: As if, yeah.

MARISHA: Yep.

LAURA: Be on our way.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: Big dick energy.

MATT: I need you all to make, aside from you, the rest of you to make a group deception check.

SAM: Okay.

MARISHA: Come on, let's all--

SAM: Okay.

TALIESIN: Cool!

MARISHA: Didn't we have advantage--

MATT: This is not an advantage because this is not a quick drive by. This is a walk in with a very, very meticulous inspection of each of you.

LAURA: Deception.

TRAVIS: Fuck. Shit.

LAURA: Okay? Okay.

LIAM: Nine.

MATT: Actually, well, you are wearing their robes so I will give you advantage on this.

SAM: Oh! What a good luck!

LIAM: 12.

MARISHA: (exhales) That's so much better!

MATT: 12?

TALIESIN: Much better. I mean, still sucks, but eight.

LAURA: Oh god!

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: Which is good for me.

MATT: 12, eight.

TRAVIS: 21.

LAURA: Oh, thank god!

MARISHA: 18.

LAURA: Okay. Okay.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: Okay.

TRAVIS: (laughs) (yells) Matt! What are you doing?

LAURA: (laughs) We get "The Purge."

MARISHA: (laughs)

LAURA: (groans)

MARISHA: So stressed!

TRAVIS: DEFCON 2.

MATT: You all begin to step and--

LIAM: Wendagoth goes.

MATT: -- climb the outer edge of this pit. You rise up and, as you are heading up the stone way, one of the figures, a female figure, goes, "Hold on." Glances at you in your garb.

MARISHA: Mm.

MATT: Pulls the goggles up. Remember when you fought in a kitchen at a house in Yios?

TRAVIS: Could you be more specific?

SAM: Was there a horse in the hallway?

MATT: With a horse in the hallway.

TALIESIN: Mm.

TRAVIS: Oh, when I headbutted a clydesdale?

MATT: Yeah. (laughs)

TRAVIS: Uh-huh.

MATT: A familiar face from that day.

LAURA: Oh! Are you kidding me?

MARISHA: This soon?

MATT: Gives you an intense glance over.

TRAVIS: Well, to be fair, I was a wolf.

LAURA: That's true!

TRAVIS: For that fight.

MATT: That's true. You were a wolf.

SAM: You smell the same.

LAURA: (laughs)

TRAVIS: I mean, the musk permeates any nature, and act of nature.

MATT: That's true. Scans over the rest.

MARISHA: Where-- Where are we? What-- what's the setting?

TRAVIS: You okay?

LAURA: Huh?

TRAVIS: You all right?

LAURA: Don't do anything yet!

SAM: What's the setting? This is a Dungeons & Dragons campaign.

MARISHA and SAM: (laugh)

LAURA: We're not starting a battle right now.

MARISHA: Yeah. Okay.

TRAVIS: Somebody looked at me and acted like something--

LAURA: All of the rest of us, our hair is pulled back, our hoods are up, we got masks over our face.

MATT: I understand.

TALIESIN: We also, yeah, should do a little bit of--

LIAM: But also, if we keep talking and stop him from talking, then nothing bad will ever happen.

ASHLEY: Yes.

SAM: Oh, it's time to go to break! (laughter)

MATT: The figure inspects the rest of the crew as you're stepping by and you see this intense scan of your troop. She looks back and mouths something to one of the other people standing on the side, the one that originally approached and talked to you, gives a nod.

TRAVIS: We're going to need to split up.

LAURA: Why?

TRAVIS: Now. You go, you go.

TALIESIN: Is there any covers or anything? Is there any place where we can--

TRAVIS: Just slow this down.

TALIESIN: Lose them a little bit?

TRAVIS: Use the sandstorm to your advantage.

MATT: The figure that saw this, the one that approached you, this is happening rather rapidly.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: Begins to walk towards you, putting a hand up to stop the rest of the troop. "Can I talk with you for a moment?"

LAURA: Make it fast.

ASHLEY: (groans)

MATT: Pulls you about 10 feet away and not quite making eye contact with you, talking out the side of their face towards you. "Who are these individuals?"

LAURA: I don't think you need to know that.

MATT: "I think I do. It is part of my job here to remain post for outsiders. One of my aides here at the site has exhibited some concern that perhaps you have been infiltrated."

LAURA: Which one?

MATT: Gives a nod over towards Orym and gives a glance over towards... I think it'd probably be you.

SAM: Laudna?

MATT: Yeah.

SAM: Well, we got to kill them.

TRAVIS: How many of them are there?

LAURA: Tell your aide there's nothing to worry about. They've been in my service for a long time and have been working doubles. This doesn't go beyond us.

MATT: (whooshes) Another wave comes cascading through the tunnel. The nearby automaton (crunches) picks up again, continues its move, and it begins to turn to make its path backward on its patrol, heading in the direction of your crew. "Hmm." Make one more deception check. This will be with disadvantage because they're very, very... They are anxious. They are close to a specific day they've been working hard for and they are looking for any signs of infiltration.

TRAVIS: While this conversation was happening, before you roll, I casually look over our shoulders. Anybody behind us?

MATT: Make a perception check.

TRAVIS: Just one second. Never mind. Natural one.

MATT: No, you don't see anybody. Looks like these three figures and the one patrolling automaton, that's about 20 feet off where you stand.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

SAM: Sand gets in all those different cracks. It gets everywhere.

MARISHA: It gets everywhere.

LAURA: 15.

MATT: 15.

SAM: With disadvantage?

ASHLEY: She has high deception.

MATT: "I'm sorry, but it is my ass on the line. You can continue, but we have to take them in." Turns around, goes snap. "We need to please take these figures, bind them, disrobe them," and one of the figures begins to walk over to one of the automaton and waves it over and (heavy stomps) begins to quicken its pace in the direction of the crew of you five.

TRAVIS: There are three individuals here?

MATT: Three individuals and the automaton, yeah.

LAURA: Says, just in Laudna's head: "Run!" You heard them. Freeze, both of you!

SAM: Oh god!

LIAM: What is this about?

LAURA: In your head: "Run!"

TRAVIS: (whispers) Run.

LIAM: Think. In or out?

LAURA: (laughs) Whichever way will cause a distraction.

MATT: The one that was talking to you, with the staff, begins to mutter an incantation under its breath. Then as they release the hand--

MARISHA: Let's go!

MATT: I need you and you to make wisdom saving throws.

TRAVIS: Okay.

MARISHA: Who? Who? Who?

MATT: Everyone, but Imogen.

SAM: You're among them.

TRAVIS: Natural 20.

MARISHA: Me too?

MATT: Natural 20?

TRAVIS: Advantage on it because it's magic, right?

MATT: Yep.

TRAVIS: Okay.

MARISHA: Me as well?

SAM: You as well.

MATT: Mm-hmm.

ASHLEY: Are they only trying to take Orym and--

LAURA: It seems like it.

LIAM: 17.

MATT: 17. Okay.

LAURA: What'd you roll?

MARISHA: 18.

LAURA: Okay. Okay.

MATT: 18.

LAURA: Okay.

TALIESIN: Fuck!

MATT: Great! All of you feel this magical influence--

TALIESIN: Six.

MATT: -- begin to stick into your body and you shrug it off. You feel your entire physical form (cracks) freezes up, all of your muscles locking in place as paralysis takes over.

TALIESIN: Fuck!

MATT: What are you doing?

MARISHA: What are we doing, Orym? (panicky) What are we doing, Orym?

LIAM: I don't know, man.

TRAVIS: Guess what! The one who cast it--

MATT: Yeah.

TRAVIS: -- I make a beeline right for him. As I run, I take my chisel and I go from my navel to my neck (whooshes) and pull Chetney open inside (growls) and attack him, like straight up attack.

MATT: And that's where we'll pick up as soon as we finish our break. (groaning)

MARISHA: Oh, we're fighting! (laughter)

LAURA: No!

MARISHA: We're fighting! We got to kill these bitches!

MATT: I'll set this down as a transition so you can get some thoughts on what this is.

SAM: Oh! Oh!

TALIESIN: Rolling like shit.

SAM: Oh! We're setting down a map? I already read this.

LAURA: That fast?

TRAVIS: You got to go.

SAM: This map is brought to you by WizKid Minis!

TRAVIS: We got to break his concentration so your paralysis drops.

SAM: Pre-order painted or unpainted versions of Uk'otoa today! WizKids.io/CRMinis or your friendly local game store.

MATT: So we have Imogen back here.

LAURA: Kill them softly and quietly.

MATT: The wolf is right here, rushing up.

MARISHA: Let's kill them and bury them!

LAURA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Yep. Take their shit!

MATT: Orym. You're all standing off this side here.

TALIESIN: Hey, there's tents, too! We can drag them in there.

LAURA: Yeah, that's cool.

SAM: This fight is in-tents! (laughter)

TALIESIN: Hey!

TRAVIS: Shame on you!

TALIESIN: That made me happy!

LAURA: (laughs)

MATT: Here. From here, we will have the--

LAURA: (groans)

MARISHA: Fuck, I didn't want to do this this soon, but here we fucking go!

TALIESIN: Here we go!

MATT: Actually, you'd be back here with this fella--

TALIESIN: If we do it right, we just chill this out again.

MATT: Since you just walked off to talk about 10 feet. This is the one that cast the spell.

TRAVIS: Sometimes it's go time, y'all.

MATT: Since you did run and leap, we'll start there because you did just say you leapt and transformed.

TRAVIS: Yep.

MATT: Then we have two figures that were watching down here, off to the side, keeping an eye here as you rush past.

MARISHA: The automatons are crossing, doing patrol?

MATT: Right here.

LIAM: But there's one.

MARISHA: (groans)

TRAVIS: Jeez!

MARISHA: Fuck! No!

LAURA: Whoa!

TRAVIS: Okay! Hold me closer, Tony Danza!

ASHLEY: Oh! Look at!

LAURA: He's so cute, though!

TALIESIN: How long has it been since the last boom?

LAURA: Good boy!

MATT: The last boom? This is maybe 10 seconds after.

TALIESIN: Okay. So it's a while.

MATT: Yeah.

TALIESIN: All right, never mind.

MATT: So we'll go to break,

<!-- BREAK BEGINS we'll pick up at this when we return. See you in a few minutes.

MARISHA: Fuck!

TRAVIS: Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck! (mysterious music) (fantasy music) Hey Critters! Laura Bailey here to guide you through what's new in the Critical Role shop. (gasp) Could anything be more perfect? I mean the Traveler always says impulse purchases are a good decision. Oh, so comfy cozy. Look at this! Isn't it fashion? So much fashion happening here. The cuteness! It's overpowering. It's so cute. I can't handle it. This is...this is a lot of stuff, you guys. We have so many cool things right now. And hey if you want, you could head over to the Critical Role shop right now. Narrator: We now return to Tal'Dorei Theater and the Bard College of Tragedy. (both yelling) I stabbeth thee! I am stabbed! Any last words? O! O, most cruel treachery! But there is poetry in misery. Fate inspires in as it twists the knife and severs the golden threads that brought me to this tragic end! Thus, die I! Alone! Alas! Thus! Alas! (choir singing in harmony) Inspired! My gaze turns to the heavens, and your sorrowful fate is mine to alter! Shall your pleas be heard beyond the gates divine? (screams) Alas, my charisma saves are for nought. Too plagued with regret to beg for relief, God abandons his child in life and death. (groans) (dramatic piano) Ah! I stab you again! Ooh! That's two! Out, brief candle. This walking shadow spins its tale of hubris to the ears of arrogance. My fate is tragic, but yours, O foe, is worse. A fatal downfall waits for you, so vile and filled with devilry that my dying words cannot encompass it! Tragedy awaits thee who struck me down! Weapon attacks now score critical hits against you on an 18 through 20. And impending misfortune beckons me. Triumph and time grow short. Though I falter, a short rest is all I need. Will thou give it me? Alas, my nimbus of pathos completes. (somber piano) A plague on both your houses! A horse! My Twitchdom for a horse! Just die already! (groans) Goosh! Goosh! Goosh. (exhaling loudly) The rest is silence. (crowd applause) Narrator: Turn misery into powerful poetry. Enroll in the Bard College of Tragedy, with Tal'Dorei Campaign Setting Reborn. Available now at Critical Role shops. (somber piano) (epic music) (mischievous music) (typewriter clacking) (peaceful music) Announcer: We now go live to a special address from the President. Hey dweebs. Now as your president, I've been kinda killing it lately. I gave global warming an atomic wedgie. I balanced the budget by selling my Pog collection, and I saved the Queen of England from that octopus! But my kick-assery is far from done. According to this chart that I made, an estimated 35% of you are still a bunch of nasty goobers, but don't worry, I have a plan. Operation: Gag Me With A Spoon. It's easy sleazy. According to this study that I wrote, if every citizen subscribed to Critical Role on Twitch, we could reduce maximum goobage by a metric buttload. Twitch is the only place where you'll get a live and moderated chat and when you subscribe to Critical Role, you instantly get access to all their shows as soon as the live broadcast ends. So while you're oogling those Critical Role dorks with their sick goof-em-ups and their nerdy voices, think of me, Gale, the current president of whatever. Now I gotta go make a fresh batch of spitballs, but I guess I have some time for your boring questions. You. Reporter: Gale, is it true that if you subscribe to Critical Role through Prime Gaming, you have to resubscribe every month? Uh, yeah. I do it right after my monthly prank call to Pee-an O'Brien. Next question. Reporter: Does Critical Role have exclusive emotes for their subscribers? Uh, doy. Of course they do. I like the hello bees one, 'cause bees are cool. I replaced my whole security detail with a bunch of bees that think I'm their queen. Last question. Reporter: Yeah, with all due respect, is Operation: Gag Me With a Spoon a real policy, or are you mad goofin'? Am I mad goofin'? What, do you see me scarfing Milk Duds while doodling ding-dongs in the SkyMall catalog? Listen, I know I'm new to this. And I admit that when I made the wish to be the boss of everything, I did not know the witch that works at Woolworth's was listening. Well, Faustian bargain or not, I am the president and I have an obligation to lead this country. So to answer your question, no, I am not mad goofin'. Security, take him out. (bees buzzing) (Gale laughing) Later, chudruckers!BREAK ENDS -->

Part II
MATT: And welcome back. (laughter) And I think--

SAM: Was that right?

TALIESIN: That's twice, that's twice!

MATT: With that, let's--

ASHLEY: ♪ Flick 'o the wrist. ♪

MATT: Let's go ahead and roll initiative.

TRAVIS: Oh, we just wasted no--

SAM: Here we go.

TRAVIS: No time, no time, here we go, like the present. Really? You fucking-- Okay.

MARISHA: Oh no!

LIAM: Oh, abysmal.

TRAVIS: I don't get a surprise round for running at him, do I?

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

MATT: I'll give you advantage, actually, why not?

TRAVIS: Oh! I'll take that.

MATT: Because you did rush at him with force.

TALIESIN: Oh my god, that's awful.

TRAVIS: Thank you. That's much better.

TALIESIN: Okay.

TRAVIS: 15. Oh, I'll wait until you count it off.

TALIESIN: So low.

MATT: All right. So, 25 to 20?

LIAM: No.

MATT: No? 20 to 15?

MARISHA: 19.

TRAVIS: 15.

MARISHA: I don't want to go first.

TRAVIS: 15.

ASHLEY: Oh boy, oh boy.

LIAM: Yeah, it's the worst.

MARISHA: Fuck.

TRAVIS: You're sub 15?

LIAM: I rolled real low.

TRAVIS: I don't know what that means. Okay.

LAURA: This is the first time ever in this campaign.

LIAM: There is no Liam.

LAURA: (laughs)

TRAVIS: There is no--

MATT: 15 to 10.

LIAM: 14.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: Okay. (laughter)

MATT: 10 to five?

TALIESIN: Nine.

LAURA: Six.

TRAVIS: Jesus, guys! End of the world, step it up.

MATT: Wow.

MARISHA: Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, what, what?

ASHLEY: Step up your rolls!

TALIESIN: Oh.

MARISHA: Imogen. Right? Is that what it was?

LAURA: Yeah, I'm the last one.

MARISHA: All right.

LAURA: Jeez!

LIAM: But it's going to be really good when it happens.

MATT: All righty. Laudna, you are up first.

MARISHA: Oh god!

MATT: Right as Chetney transforms and begins to lunge forward, you notice the game is on. What are you doing?

MARISHA: I transform into my Form of Dread!

SAM: Ah! (laughter)

MATT: What does your form look like?

MARISHA: You see, going off of these gnarled trees that are around me, that full petrified forest as branches start sprouting from my shoulders--

MATT: Hell yeah.

MARISHA: -- and creeping up like corrosion up my face. Then there's what? There's these two fuckers here that Chet's not dealing with.

MATT: These two here that Chet's not dealing with, this is the one that Chet came after, and then this is the large Warder that is charging in your direction.

MARISHA: I'm going to go--

LAURA: Oh, he sees us, he's charging.

MATT: Hmm?

LAURA: He fully sees us, and is charging in our direction.

MATT: Well, he's certainly moving back and all of a sudden there's an attack there and is taking notice of the attack. He's not at full charge, but definitely acknowledging that a fray is about to start.

LAURA: Cool, cool, cool.

MARISHA: This big, the big baddie?

MATT: Likely.

MARISHA: Big fatty? Likely.

LAURA: Big cutie.

MARISHA: Big cooties. I will Bane. Shit.

LIAM: (like Bane) Oh. (laughter)

MATT: Goddamn it.

TALIESIN: There's still a spellcaster in there, so.

ASHLEY: (like Bane) I want a sandwich.

TALIESIN: Save me!

MARISHA: I will--

TRAVIS: Sandwich? (laughs)

TALIESIN: Ca-caw, help.

SAM: (like Bane) I'd like a nice Reuben sandwich.

MARISHA: "-- can target one additional creature."

ASHLEY: (like Bane) Could I have the soup and salad combo-- (laughter)

MATT: You who Bane-ing?

TALIESIN: I had the Filet-O-Fish. Give me a Filet-O-Fish.

MARISHA: I'm going to do it at 2nd-level.

MATT: Oh.

MARISHA: So I can Bane everyone on the fucking board.

TALIESIN: Whoa.

MATT: ♪ Everyone on the board ♪

MARISHA: The three guards and the--

TRAVIS: Tiny dancer?

MARISHA: And Tony Danza.

TALIESIN: Tony Danza?

LAURA and ASHLEY: ♪ Hold me closer ♪

ASHLEY: ♪ Tony Danza ♪ (laughter)

MATT: Bane, Bane, Bane.

TRAVIS: ♪ Bane ♪

MATT: Bane! All right, got it. They are all-- Oh, they have to save against that, right?

TRAVIS: ♪ Damn, damn, damn, damn ♪

MATT: Sorry. Forgot it's a Wis--

MARISHA: Charisma save.

MATT: Charisma save. Okay. There, that is a 15 for this guy.

MARISHA: 15's what he needed.

MATT: Okay, so he does, he resists it.

MARISHA: Titties.

MATT: This one right here. That's a 13, so, no, he stays.

LAURA: ♪ T-t-titties ♪

MATT: This one that you're attacking right there.

ASHLEY: ♪ T-t-titties ♪

MATT: That's a 12, and this one here--

TALIESIN: Yes.

MATT: -- has advantage.

LIAM: Positive confirmation, not negative.

MARISHA: He has advantage on charisma saves?

ASHLEY: It can be both.

MATT: Yes.

LAURA: Yeah, just--

MATT: But he also has minus two on charisma. So, that's an 11.

TRAVIS: Oh! (laughs)

MARISHA: Okay, great.

ASHLEY: Tits is good.

TRAVIS: Well done, well done.

SAM: Tits is good, titties is bad. ASHLEY Titties is--

TALIESIN: We've got Bane now, we got a Bane.

MATT: He's not a very charismatic automaton.

TALIESIN: It means he has to roll a d4 against saves.

LAURA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Okay.

TALIESIN: d4 against saves, Bane, and--

TRAVIS: And it lowers it?

MATT: And--

SAM: Titties?

MATT: -- attack rolls are minus d4.

TALIESIN: Yeah, so--

LAURA: Titties.

MARISHA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: Their attacks are minus d4 and saves are minus d4.

MARISHA: Attacks and saves.

MATT: Correct.

MARISHA: So, robot guy has advantage on charisma saves. Then I'm going to jump down here.

TALIESIN: That's good.

MATT: All right. You're just going to leap?

MARISHA: Yep.

LAURA: How far of a leap is this?

LIAM: All your bones break.

MATT: It's about 15 feet, make an acrobatics check.

MARISHA: That's--

MATT: You can walk down carefully, but make an acrobatics check for me to make sure you don't end up falling prone in the process.

MARISHA: Yeah, that's great. 17.

MATT: 17, yeah. So you dart down, and catch yourself with the wind. You're standing fine. All right, that finishes your turn?

MARISHA: Mm-hmm.

MATT: Yep. All right, that brings us to--

MARISHA: Go, Chetney, go!

MATT: -- this fella here that's right up in your face--

MARISHA: Oh shit!

MATT: -- who managed to roll a really high, comparatively, a high initiative on that. Let's see, you're right there.

LAURA: ♪ (background music melody) ♪

TALIESIN: Oh my god.

MATT: That's too dangerous.

LIAM: Get bent, nerd.

MARISHA: Fuck yeah.

TALIESIN: That smelled lemony.

LAURA: Nope!

LIAM: Your bloodline--

MATT: Yeah, the positioning's a little off on this. Yeah, rushing up there fucked his maneuver. So, he's going to go ahead and--

LAURA: I took Telepathic.

LIAM: Okay, I guess that makes sense.

MATT: (sighs) Yeah, he's caught off guard as you rush towards him. He just (groans) and releases a Fire Bolt right in front.

TRAVIS: Okay, all right.

MATT: That'll be with disadvantage, because it is a ranged attack in melee.

TALIESIN: And d4.

MATT: Indeed.

TALIESIN: Yep.

MATT: Minus a d4 on that.

TALIESIN: I'm going to be that guy--

MATT: It was a natural 20.

LAURA: Oh.

MATT: But with disadvantage, it rolled an 18. So, that is going to be... It's 21.

TRAVIS: That hits.

TALIESIN: Including Bane?

MATT: Bane dropped it by three.

TALIESIN: Okay.

SAM: Whoa.

TALIESIN: Damn.

LAURA: Wow.

MATT: He rolled very well on that opening round, so.

TALIESIN: That's a good roll. Could've been worse.

LAURA: Got 18 with disadvantage.

TRAVIS: Oh yeah, could've been much worse.

MATT: 15 points of fire damage right into you at point blank. A burst of fire in the vicinity before he beings to pull back, and stops himself, looking back at the massive hole directly behind him, and is going to shift this way. You do get an attack of opportunity, if you want.

TRAVIS: Good thing I got this Ring of Fire Resistance-- (Fjord) Oh, the Apogee Solstice. (Grog) Oh, what's happened?

MATT: (laughs) Whoa!

TRAVIS: (burbles) (Chetney) Oh, help me!

LAURA: I wouldn't get enough of a hit on him to do any good, and I'd rather keep my--

MATT: Just let it go? Reaction?

LAURA: Yeah, I want to keep my reaction, and not let him know whether I'm on his side or not.

MATT: You got it. All right, that finishes your go. Chetney, you're up, with Orym on deck.

TRAVIS: Damn, I wanted to get sneak attack, but that's okay, I will take my claws, and I'll drag them across my rippling furry deltoid! You'll see ice shards go across each of my super long dangerous claws.

MATT: Hell yeah.

TRAVIS: Oh, let me roll d6 for that. Four. Okay, and I will take three strikes against the gentleman that is Baned that moved away.

MATT: Go for it.

TRAVIS: Four damage to me, okay. First one is a 21 to hit.

MATT: That hits.

TRAVIS: Okay, second one. 18 to hit.

MATT: Hits.

TRAVIS: Okay, third one, natural one.

MATT: Okay, so two hits.

TRAVIS: Two hits. 2d6 plus-- Three, eight. 12 for the first strike.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: The second one. Yeah. And 10, 11, and then four. So, 15 for the second one.

MATT: 15 for the second strike. Arced through both claws as it tries to dart around to the side after the flame blast, you dig in both slashes, the third one goes wide, but even in those two hits they're, ugh! They're already looking hurt, and in reaction he'll look over and be, "Warder!" Shouting out towards the entity here that's been walking.

MARISHA: Warder?

SAM: Oh, I thought he said Walter.

MATT: No, Warder, Warder. (laughter)

ASHLEY: I thought he said "water."

LAURA: Warder.

MATT: Then, you see focus.

MARISHA: Warder is how my--

SAM: Warder, I need Warder!

TRAVIS: I'm going to use my movement to roll around, stay in his melee, but roll around, so that I'm on his back side.

MATT: Over here?

TRAVIS: Yeah. getting out of Imogen's way and--

MATT: You've got it.

TALIESIN: I'm not a concentration--

TRAVIS: -- using him as a little bit of a meat shield for the other guys.

TALIESIN: I'm not a concentration spell, am I?

MATT: No worries.

TALIESIN: His Hold on me is not a concentration spell?

MATT: No, it would be.

TALIESIN: Okay.

MATT: So. that would be.

MARISHA: It's very Appalachia.

TALIESIN: Minus a d4.

MATT: That's true, yeah, minus a d4. That's a four, that takes it to nine, which means it drops the concentration, you are no longer paralyzed.

ALL: Eyy!

TALIESIN: (grunts)

MARISHA: Come on, get back in the--

TRAVIS: That's what we wanted, that's what we wanted.

MATT: Perfect, yeah.

ASHLEY: ♪ Get back in the game ♪

MATT: I was, okay, that's close-- Bane, that's what put it over the edge.

TRAVIS: That's great.

MATT: Because it only had a DC 10 to make.

ASHLEY and SAM: (Bane groan)

TALIESIN: Is the robot under Bane, too?

MATT: Yes. All right, so, Orym, you're up.

LIAM: Okay, so I look over my shoulder, and see Ashton sort of unlock.

TALIESIN: (groans)

LIAM: Oh, thank fuck! I leap to the top of that tent, and spring off of it towards the mage.

LAURA and MARISHA: Boing!

LIAM: Pyow! Slash, slash.

MATT: You got it. Landing between Imogen and the dude?

LIAM: Yeah. I will block--

MARISHA: Pahh!

LIAM: -- Imogen for sure.

MATT: You got it.

ASHLEY: Pahh!

MARISHA: I can't do it.

TRAVIS: (explosive exhale)

ASHLEY: Yeah, when he does--

MARISHA: That was pretty good.

LIAM: Okay.

TRAVIS: (fires finger guns)

LIAM: First attack is a 23 to hit.

MATT: That hits.

LIAM: 24 to hit. We'll keep it simple. That is 10 damage, and the second slash is way higher, 18 plus-- So it's 27 to hit.

MATT: Mm-hmm.

LIAM: So it was a 10 for the first and seven for the second. I'm going to-- Hmm, huh. ♪ Hmm, hmm, hmm ♪ That's it. I'm going to hold my ground.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: Yeah, we're not sending them for yodel- lay-hee-hoo, right?

LAURA: Mm-mm.

TALIESIN: No.

TRAVIS: Okay.

MATT: Both strikes as you land, and hold the ground and the person, the mage figure falls to one knee. "(grunts)" The staff that they're holding begins to crack as they put their weight on it. They're looking real hurt.

SAM: Nice, Liam.

MATT: That finishes Orym's go. It's now the Defenders' go. This one here is going to turn, and immediately come after you, Orym, since you just slashed heavily into his friends and are right there. This one's going to move forward, and engage with you, Ashton.

TALIESIN: Awesome.

MATT: So, against you, Orym, that one's going to attack twice with this mace they pull out. This heavy-handed, hooked-looking, metal mace, and swing down with their shield at the side. First attack is going to be a 13. (laughs)

LIAM: Rolls to the side. Get wrecked.

MATT: That's going to be a 12.

LIAM: He keeps rolling. (laughter)

MATT: (whiffed air slashes) The one that's coming after you, Ashton, that's going to be-- Ah, that's better. That's going to be 19 to hit.

TALIESIN: Do they have a d4 on them? Are they Baned, or no?

MARISHA: Everyone except for the one dude.

MATT: Everyone except one was Baned. So, it's a 19, 17.

TALIESIN: AC is 17.

MATT: So yeah, it still hits you, and the other one is going to be-- Oh, that one misses. A two minus four. Leave the benefits there.

SAM: Wait, that's not just painted on him?

MATT: So, you do take--

LAURA: No, he sprinkled it.

MARISHA: He has a little--

MATT: -- four points of bludgeoning damage.

LIAM: He zhuzhes it with--

SAM: Sesame seeds?

LIAM: Cat sand, maybe?

MATT: Across the front, puts its shield up at the ready, and it's preparing for the counter assault.

TRAVIS: Yeah!

SAM: Can I snort it?

MATT: Finishing their go, Ashton, you're up.

MARISHA: You can certainly try.

TALIESIN: You fuck! I'm going to pull the hammer right off my back and go for a swing around that shield.

MATT: You've got it.

TALIESIN: First, of course, I am going to fucking rage.

TRAVIS: Yes yes!

TALIESIN: We got a number two. So we are at... Come on. Okay, no, never mind.

SAM: Who?

TALIESIN: Oh wow, now we're playing with portals.

MARISHA: No one knows your shit.

TALIESIN: Here we go.

LAURA: What?

TALIESIN: I go slightly invisible, the head starts to actually go see through and the hammer goes a little see though, like a little weird heat vent, and--

LIAM: Portals!

MATT: Cool.

TALIESIN: Let's hit that motherfucker. I'm going to do a--

MARISHA: ♪ Apogee Solstice ♪

TALIESIN: I'm going to do reckless and take a shot at him.

MATT: Do it, do it.

LAURA: ♪ I'm not even angry ♪

TALIESIN: That's 20, I want to say.

SAM: Reorganizing your purse?

ASHLEY: I'm looking for my lotion.

MATT: 20 hits.

TALIESIN: 20 hits?

ASHLEY: I'm reorganizing my purse while watching you play.

TALIESIN: That's... Ugh, that's terrible. Eight, nine, 10. That's 11 points of damage.

MATT: All righty. 11 points damage from the first strike.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: The shield hits the bulk of it, and as you push the shield back, it slams him into the face. They're like, "(grunts)." You see a chipped tooth and blood coming out of their mouth.

TALIESIN: All right, going to-- All right, here we go for another reckless attack. Come on. Yeah, that definitely hits. 19 plus--

MATT: Yeah.

TALIESIN: So that's... Come on. That, that's a mess.

LIAM: That's big cock.

TALIESIN: That was a big cock. There we go. 18, plus I'm going to shove him, so.

TRAVIS: Yep.

MATT: 18 damage. All righty.

LAURA: (laughs)

TALIESIN: I'm going to shove him to my right.

MATT: Shove him which way?

TALIESIN: Actually, I'm just shoving--

MATT: How are you shoving him?

TALIESIN: Oh, I'm shoving him five feet away from me with it. I'm basically bringing my hammer up, hitting him again in the shield, and popping him again in the face, and trying to make him stagger back. I have a thing that allows me to do that.

TRAVIS: Off the top level?

MATT: Oh, on the--

TALIESIN: It's Crusher.

MATT: Oh yeah, totally. So you knock him five feet back?

TALIESIN: Mm-hmm.

MATT: All right. (impact) "(groans)" He gets pushed back a bit and is teetering on the edge, ready to fall accidentally.

TRAVIS: Do it.

TALIESIN: All right, I'm going to run--

MATT: "Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!"

TALIESIN: -- run straight into the... Get in the middle of everything down there.

MATT: All right.

LAURA: Oh gosh.

TALIESIN: There we go.

MATT: In between all three of them?

TALIESIN: No, no, no. I'm going to get right on top of that stone right there.

MATT: Right here?

TALIESIN: Yeah, so that everything can fuck with me.

MATT: You got it. Okay. Finishing your go, it's now the Warder's turn.

LIAM: Oh.

MATT: This massive creature. This--

LAURA: Uh-oh.

MATT: -- towering-looking, armored automaton--

LIAM: Please don't start with Imogen.

MATT: -- that's now shifted its attention, its head is almost non-existent beyond just a couple of eyes and the weird plates of armor that shift around its torso. Its arms reach down, grab the edge of the tent before it, and go (whooshes)!

TRAVIS: Awesome!

MATT: Lifts it up, and chuck it right at you. (laughter)

LAURA: A whole tent?!

TALIESIN: I'm into it.

MATT: (impacts)

TRAVIS: Oh!

MARISHA: (laughs)

LIAM: Man, I wish there was a guy in an outhouse in there.

TALIESIN: Minus a d4.

MATT: Minus a d4, that's true.

MARISHA: Full "Jurassic Park."

SAM: Yeah.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

LAURA: Oh my god.

MATT: So minus one, that'll put it at a 24.

ASHLEY: I'm taking a shit!

TALIESIN: Yeah, that hits.

MATT: (impacts) I need you to make a strength saving throw for me.

MARISHA: He does have Bane-- No, that doesn't do shit, doesn't it?

TALIESIN: Strength saving throw.

MATT: No, I rolled it to take off.

MARISHA: Okay.

TALIESIN: Strength saving throw.

LAURA: I think you're strong.

TALIESIN: I do not have, I have advantage on those--

MATT: Yes, while you're raging.

TRAVIS: He might have to go over the edge.

TALIESIN: Strength saving, so.

LAURA: But I don't know another option.

TALIESIN: It's 20.

MARISHA: I'm fine with that, actually.

TALIESIN: 13 plus seven, so that's--

MATT: 20, yes you do not get knocked down or knocked prone, you take the hit--

TALIESIN: Oh!

MATT: -- and stand there. But you do take 12 points of bludgeoning damage.

TALIESIN: Reduced to six?

MATT: Reduced to six.

TALIESIN: All right.

MATT: It closes the distance (stomps), and steps up to harry you on this side.

TALIESIN: How big would you consider this to probably be? Is that-- Just for reasons, is that?

MATT: It's huge.

TALIESIN: It's huge? Okay.

LIAM: Huge.

MARISHA: It's huge.

MATT: It's considered a huge creature.

TALIESIN: Okay, cool.

SAM: It's huge.

MATT: All right, that finishes its turn. That brings us to Imogen.

TALIESIN: Damn it. Push it further away.

LAURA: Uh-huh?

LIAM: Here it is, the big finisher. End of the initiative roster.

LAURA: Uh-huh.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

LAURA: Uh-huh. Okay.

MARISHA: One round.

LIAM: Super flashy.

LAURA: Super duper flashy.

LIAM: Be really creative.

LAURA: Uh-huh.

LIAM: Never seen it before.

LAURA: Uh-huh. I'm going to step up. Oh god. Okay, I'm going to step up in front of Orym.

MATT: In front of him?

LAURA: Uh-huh, can I do that?

MATT: Orym is in front of you, and there's a guy on the other side of him, but you can try and--

LIAM: She technically could stand in the same space that I'm in.

MATT: That's true, I'll say you stand over him.

LIAM: I can stand between your legs.

MATT: Do you want to do that?

LAURA: I don't want Orym to get hurt. No, I don't want Orym to get hurt.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: Erp!

TALIESIN: I mean--

LAURA: Ehh.

TALIESIN: What does that mean? Yeah.

TALIESIN: He's nimble.

LIAM: Emotionally?

TALIESIN: Yeah, I mean--

LAURA: Can I, okay, can I use my--

LIAM: A little late.

LAURA: -- Telekinetic Shove to push Orym back?

MATT: Sure.

SAM: Whoa!

MATT: Push Orym back, and you're moving in front of him?

LAURA: Yeah.

LIAM: I do it all the time with Bait and Switch--

LAURA: Yeah.

LIAM: I move people around.

MATT: Yeah, you Bait and Switch-- You pull his own shit on him, that's great.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: All right, so you move him back, leapfrog over, and land in the position.

LAURA: I don't think it's going to make a difference here, because it's 10 feet of me, so you would still get hurt. All the other guys are within 10 feet of me, right?

MATT: They are.

LAURA: All right, then I'm going to hit a 2nd-level, my hair's going to float up, and I'm going to look one of those balls, what are the ones? That you touch and all the stuff come out.

MARISHA and SAM: Oh.

LIAM and MATT: The Tesla coil.

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: Kind of vibe? No, no. I know what you're talking about.

MARISHA: What are those called? The plasma balls!

LAURA: Plasma ball!

TALIESIN: Thank you.

LAURA: I'm going to look like a little plasma ball for a second, and (crackling). I'm going to hit Shock Flare at 2nd-level on all three of these guys.

TRAVIS: ♪ Shock Flare! ♪

MATT: You've got it. All righty.

ASHLEY: ♪ Shock Flare! ♪

MATT: What's the save on that?

TRAVIS: (laughs)

LIAM: Oh, there is no save, it says.

LAURA: Strength saving throw.

MATT: Strength saving throw. That is going to be a eight. This one's minus four.

SAM: Bzzt!

MATT: Eight. That one does not have Bane. Oh, no, sorry, no, that was the one who didn't have Bane, one had Bane, and the third one that has Bane. That's going to be a 10, so they all fail.

LAURA: Okay, they all fail.

LIAM: Hmm, nice.

LAURA: Okay, so that is--

ASHLEY: Ooh!

LAURA: 12 points of lightning damage to all three of them.

TALIESIN: Hmm.

MARISHA: Bane might be one of the best spells.

ASHLEY: It's pretty great.

TALIESIN: (as Bane) Ah! Bane's amazing.

MARISHA: Bane and Boon. Pretty great.

ASHLEY: Bane!

TALIESIN: Bane and Bless.

MATT: As the energy crackles around you, your hair raises up, and you release the blast. The one that's across from you that had been, the one that initially was talking, the mage, gets blown back into the tent, and you hear crashing sounds of shattering wood, and no further movement from the inside of that tent.

LIAM: Aw.

MARISHA: Hell yeah.

MATT: This one here--

LIAM: Yeah, what's good?

MATT: This is the one that was hit repeatedly by you.

TALIESIN: Yes.

MATT: Gets blown. Full-on Wilhelm. "Ah!" Hits the ground, tumbles to a stop and is no longer moving, shield stuck into the sand after he tumbled a few more feet. This one here gets hit, holds himself there with his shield, but took a nice little hit.

MARISHA: Can we convince this robot that all's well?

LAURA: I don't know. We can try.

MATT: All right. That finish your turn, Imogen?

LAURA: Yeah.

TALIESIN: He threw a tent at me.

MATT: All right, top of the round. Laudna, you're up.

MARISHA: Yeah, boy! I see big chonkers move over to the edge, and I go, ah! I take out Pâté and I throw him like a rubber chicken or like those-- (laughter)

MATT: (wailing)

ASHLEY: (clucking)

MARISHA: I smack him up against the robot and I'm going to cast Shocking Grasp through him.

MATT: Okay. (Pâté) "Here I come, little guy! Big guy!" All right, go ahead and roll.

MARISHA: It says, "If the target is wearing armor made of metal--"

MATT: The target is--

MARISHA: I get advantage.

MATT: -- the armor made of metal.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MARISHA: So I'm going to assume I get advantage. Oh shit, a one and a natural 19.

SAM: Whoa.

TALIESIN: Nice.

MARISHA: So I'll take that natural 19.

MATT: Yeah, go that way.

ASHLEY: So I'll take that one.

MARISHA: I'll take that one. (laughter)

MATT: Just to mix it up!

TALIESIN: Sometimes.

ASHLEY: I'm a little crazy.

MARISHA: 2d8 damage. Oh jesus fuck. Five lightning damage, which is bullshit, but it can't take reactions until the start of its next turn.

MATT: That is good to know.

ASHLEY: That's cool.

LIAM: Throwing a touch spell in a rubber chicken is amazing flavor and utility.

MATT: Yeah, that's true. That's very true.

LIAM: That was a great move.

MARISHA: Poor Pâté.

MATT: Great. Do you want to move or anything else on your turn, or are you going to stay put?

MARISHA: I'll keep strafing back a little bit, so I can get a better vantage. That's good, that's fine.

MATT: Okay, you got it. Dart backward, skittering into the sand. That finishes your go. This guy's done. Chetney, you're up, with Orym on deck.

TRAVIS: Yep, I will-- Motherfucker. I will run up towards the, up the box up to the level so I'm right underneath el robot.

MATT: All right. The dude to your right does get a swipe at you as you try and rush past.

TRAVIS: Yeah, that makes sense.

MATT: That's going to be an 18 to hit.

TRAVIS: Misses.

MATT: Misses! I won't say he misses. He hits you, but it hits your wolven hide, and you just flex it off.

TRAVIS: (deeply) Don't!

MATT: It leaves a slight cut that heals itself up as you rush past.

LAURA: Hot.

MATT: But you catch up to--

LAURA: Did I just say "hot"--

MATT: -- the large entity.

LAURA: -- in regard to Chet?

TRAVIS: I would like to--

LAURA: (gasps)

ASHLEY: Imogen!

TRAVIS: Can I try to-- Fuck it. Can I try to climb his leg?

LIAM: Cool Hand Luke vibes.

MATT: I'll allow it, if you want to try.

TRAVIS: I want to try to climb his leg and start working towards the backside of the robot if I can, even just to hold on for a second, but I want to try to look for an off switch or get a better look at this big motherfucker.

MATT: Yeah, make an athletics check.

TRAVIS: Okay, it says advantage because my wolf form.

MARISHA: I'm assuming it can't be frightened, right?

LAURA: I know, I love his little feet.

MATT: What's that?

MARISHA: The construct, I'm assuming it can't be frightened? It has to make a wi--

TRAVIS: That's a 19. 25.

MATT: 25. Even with its bonus, it does not succeed. So it tries to swing, but you manage to climb up on it as you go. Are you trying to get a good view of--

SAM: (whispers) Are you humping it?

LAURA: Just humping?

TRAVIS: I'm a wolf. I just gave it a one-er and then went up.

MARISHA and MATT: (laugh)

TRAVIS: It's a leg!

SAM: You're dominant.

TRAVIS: Some things you have to sniff and go.

MARISHA: The dog's brain shorts out.

TRAVIS: Not now, not now, not now! Later. Later, my pet. No, no!

MATT: So you do manage to climb up and skitter on it. Are you trying to investigate it as you're climbing it?

TRAVIS: Yeah, I'd like to try and investigate it, look for anything that's glyph, glowing, obvious switch, some sort of manual thing that I can hit or whatever.

MATT: Okay, you can make an activation-- Sorry, this is your action. You can make an investigation check.

TRAVIS: Great.

MATT: I'll say because you're right up against it, I'll give you advantage on this.

TRAVIS: Amazing, okay. Two 18s. 23.

MATT: 23, so you clamber up the side, and as you're glancing, there are those glyphs along its body. You do not see any sort of central power source or anything on the exterior. As you climb up its stomach, you see that opening that you noticed when you were approaching. It placed things inside. It's a hollow torso right there.

TRAVIS: It doesn't have a lid that shuts?

MATT: It has a little door that opens up on the inside. As you climb up, you can see it's partially ajar. In fact, it's opening up, and there's something within the inside that's lowering, but you can see there's a hollow space inside there where something is.

LIAM: We could also shove one of us in there. Make you the baby.

LAURA: Tele-dildonic device?

TRAVIS: Sure.

SAM: Tele-dildonic device?

MATT: Goddamn it.

TRAVIS: That's fine. I was going to say, as I crawl up, do I get a whiff of anything human or celestial or fiend on this thing, or is it just machine?

MATT: It is just machine.

TRAVIS: Copy that.

MATT: Nothing catches your attention. I'll give you that.

TRAVIS: Okay, that's my turn.

MARISHA: My Form of Dread. He has to make a wisdom saving throw, if he can be afraid.

MATT: Immune to fear.

MARISHA: That's what I figured.

MATT: But yeah, good checking in.

MATT: All right, finishing Chetney's go, Orym, you're up.

LIAM: All right.

MATT: With Ashton on deck.

LIAM: I'm going to curve away from that Baned fellow there and run, come around this way, and leap. So if I get a running jump, I can get a pretty high jump, but I'm going to try to slash. I'm going to try to jump off its knee and slash at its eyes.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: Would just be an attack. That is low. That is a 13 to hit. Probably doesn't hit.

MATT: Does not hit, unfortunately.

LIAM: Second one is a 21.

MATT: 21 does hit.

LIAM: I'll make that a goading attack.

MATT: You leap in the air. The first strike down strikes across the armor. You back it up the second swipe, right towards one of the small windows where its glowing eyes would be.

LIAM: I'll slash and then kick away. The damage is, oh, it's stuck in my sleeve.

LAURA: (laughs)

LIAM: Six plus eight.

TRAVIS: Get off of me!

LIAM: Total damage is 14, and the--

TALIESIN: I can do this.

LIAM: It's a DC 16 wisdom.

TALIESIN: I'm going to try something. Well, we'll see. A lot of variables.

MATT: (laughs) With the Bane, it is a negative two.

LIAM: Negative two, so attacks against anyone else but me are at disadvantage, and I will just hold my ground, that's it.

MATT: Okay, finishing your go, Orym. That brings us to Ashton.

TALIESIN: Okay, so how's that kid over at the bottom of the hill looking?

MATT: He took a hit, but he's still aggressively mace out, ready to knock the shit out of Imogen over there.

TALIESIN: How many feet away?

MATT: Five feet from you.

TALIESIN: I am going to take that five-foot step.

MATT: Okay, you got it.

TALIESIN: And take a swing.

MATT: It does not get an attack of opportunity on you.

TALIESIN: No, they do not.

MATT: Because of the Shocking Grasp. So go for it.

SAM: No reactions.

TALIESIN: No reaction.

SAM: Matt, you forgot the guy's move.

MARISHA: Wasn't it his turn?

TALIESIN: Oh.

MARISHA: The lackeys?

TALIESIN: Yeah, actually. Yeah.

MATT: There's one still up, you're right, thank you. I marked it out accidentally. No, I appreciate the heads up on that.

TALIESIN: Thank you.

MATT: Thank you. As you're preparing this, it takes two strikes against you, Imogen.

LAURA: Me? But what did I do?

TALIESIN: With Bane or no?

MATT: With Bane.

TALIESIN: Okay. Looking out for you.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MATT: Yeah, because you blasted that guy back.

TALIESIN: There's no way I can do this.

MATT: So that'll be 14 to hit?

LAURA: Miss!

MATT: Misses.

LAURA: Oh wait, no, that's a lie. It hits.

SAM and MARISHA: (laugh)

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: With Bane? Wow.

LIAM: Yeah, she's got 13 AC.

LAURA: I didn't put my Mage Armor up.

MATT: Second one is a natural 20.

MARISHA: (gasps)

MATT: Still minus four, but it still hits.

TALIESIN: Shit.

MATT: So the first one hits you.

LAURA: But it's not a natural. Does it count as a natural 20?

MATT: Yeah, it's still a crit.

LAURA: If it's still minus four, though?

MATT: Minutes four, it's still a crit, though. So the first hit is eight points of bludgeoning damage to you as the mace hits you in the side of the shoulder, and you feel the muscle immediately begin to warm and bleed. Second one is the crit. That's going to be 12 points of bludgeoning damage, as this actually harries you with the shield, and then as you back up away, it takes the mace downward and tries to hit you in the head. You resist it with your mind, and it deflects off, and instead strikes you in the clavicle, and you hear a slight crack, and you're like (grunts)

TALIESIN: Fuck.

LAURA: Oh fuck.

MATT: All right. Ashton.

TALIESIN: I'm going to get right behind that asshole, so that I can get advantage without reckless.

MATT: Yeah, no worries.

TALIESIN: I'm going to say: Hands off the brain! And that's a 21 to hit.

MATT: 21 hits.

TALIESIN: I'm going to use some different dice. Trade it up, see what happens. That's not bad. 13 points of damage.

MATT: 13 points of damage.

TALIESIN: Actually, I kind of want him to go down, so let's throw a Chaos Burst into that. I'm really wanting this guy to go down.

MATT: Sure.

TALIESIN: Let's hit him-- Well, I don't get to choose, do I? I'm going to have to go with it. Let's hit him with--

LIAM: That's super cocked.

TALIESIN: Super cocked.

LAURA: Super cocked!

TALIESIN: Let's hit him with some acid.

MATT: You got it.

LAURA: Acid!

TALIESIN: Two, four, so let's do that--

SAM: I'm Super Cocked. I'm here to help.

LIAM: Prepare to be--

TALIESIN: Two points of acid damage.

MATT: Okay. (groans) (flesh sizzling) The skin on the back of the head, where the hood's now back, you can see it beginning to burn with flesh burning, steam rising off of it.

SAM: Eww!

MATT: That's your first attack.

LAURA: First attack.

TALIESIN: I'm going to take another attack.

LIAM: Fuck it up to the tempo, come on.

TALIESIN: I was hoping it'd be one punch, but apparently not.

ASHLEY: Fuck it up to the tempo.

TALIESIN: 17 plus nine. Definitely hits.

MATT: That hits.

TALIESIN: 2d6. Going to want to be a little better than last time. That'll do. 15 points of damage.

MATT: 15 points of damage will do it.

TALIESIN: Is he--

MATT: The first hit hits. The second one, you bring it up again, you hear the crack and crumble from beneath and falls into a pile of twisted armor and flesh.

TALIESIN: I'm going to take that and I'm going to make a little nod at Imogen. I'm going to drop straight through the ground.

SAM: What?

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: Rock stuff.

TALIESIN: I'm going to head over about 30 feet away from that robot.

MATT: Over this way, over here?

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: You can get up on there, if you want to.

TALIESIN: Yeah, that'll do it.

MATT: All right.

TALIESIN: Am I about 30 feet? 25, 30 feet?

MATT: Yep, about 30 feet from right there.

TALIESIN: Okay, as long as I can make that run.

MATT: Yep, so you watch as Ashton falls into the ground and then appears.

ASHLEY: Cool.

LAURA: Sick!

TRAVIS: Nice.

LIAM: Punk rock.

TALIESIN: (clicks tongue)

MATT: All righty.

TALIESIN: It's going to get crazier if it works.

MATT: Finishing Ashton's go, it is now the Warder's turn.

SAM: Warder. The Hoarder?

TALIESIN: Oh shit. Are you going to be okay?

LAURA: Eh.

TALIESIN: Eh. Nothing I could've-- Oh, cool.

MATT: It's going to turn and rotate this way.

ASHLEY: Look at that big boy!

MARISHA: (laughs) I forgot Chetney was on his back!

SAM: He does have a very cute butt.

TALIESIN: I was really hoping to get that--

LAURA: So cutie!

TRAVIS: He's got kind of a diaper butt.

MARISHA: He does have a diaper butt.

LIAM: It's a diaper butt. That's what it is.

MARISHA: He's got a bit of the poopies.

MATT: Okay, yeah. Trying to rotate him in that space. You're still immediately within there. That opening in the front, you see the door shift up entirely, and you can see the empty cavity inside, and these two pipes descend.

LAURA: He's got two teledildonic devices.

MATT: (flames whooshing)

TRAVIS: Oh shit!

MATT: Flames emerge in a 30-foot spread outward.

MARISHA: "Flames emerge."

LIAM: (high-pitched) Flames!

TALIESIN: Okay.

TRAVIS: I'm glad I didn't try and climb in there!

MARISHA and LIAM: On the side of my face!

TALIESIN: So I'm just in range, in theory. Well, We'll see. I'm happy to--

ASHLEY: Why, yes you are.

MATT: Yes, you are.

ASHLEY: Oh wow.

TALIESIN: All right.

TRAVIS: Fuck!

MATT: So I need--

LIAM: -- below this or in it?

MATT: It's an arc upwards.

LIAM: Awesome.

MATT: I need both of you to make dexterity saving throws for me.

LAURA: You got this. (groans)

LIAM: It was almost a 20!

LAURA: So close! So close!

LIAM: Fail. Fail.

TALIESIN: Oh yeah. 21.

TRAVIS: So blasé.

MATT: 28 points of fire damage.

LIAM: Okay, yes, sir.

MATT: What'd you get?

TALIESIN: 21.

MATT: 21? That's 14 points of fire damage.

TALIESIN: Okay.

TRAVIS: Be advised.

MATT: As the flames emerge out and black smoke pours out of it afterward and begins to rise back up inside as the doorway closes in the front.

LIAM: Don't worry, we have a cleric.

SAM: Don't worry, we have a druid, too.

MARISHA: Uh-huh.

MATT: That finishes its turn. It's not going to try and move anywhere. Because now it's focused on you and the moving pieces on the board in front of it. Finishing its go, Imogen, you're up, with Laudna on deck.

TRAVIS: This is fucking awesome!

MARISHA: Fighting a big, chunky robot.

TRAVIS: Flamethrowers in its belly.

LAURA: Everybody's melee, right? Has melee attacks.

TRAVIS: Melee.

LIAM: Melee.

SAM: Hi, I'm Melee. Nice to meet you.

LAURA: Hi, I'm Melee. I'm going to look at it say: Grovel! I Command it to grovel.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: Mama always said I should use melee.

MATT: Wisdom?

LAURA: That is a wisdom save.

ASHLEY: Melee.

TRAVIS: Hellmann's melee makes--

ASHLEY: ♪ It's melee ♪

TRAVIS: -- a good sandwich.

MATT: With advantage.

TALIESIN: And a negative d4.

MATT: Yep.

TALIESIN: I will say that Bane for the rest of my life.

MATT: No, hell yeah, that's what it's about.

TALIESIN: I love Bane.

MARISHA: It's great.

MATT: That's going to put it at an eight.

LAURA: Fails.

MATT: So you said?

LAURA: Grovel.

MATT: Grovel, okay. You shout, and it acknowledges you for a second. It looks at you, looks at the robes you're wearing, and for a brief moment, completely buys into the illusion of you as its commander. It lowers down onto its knees. Its big, thick legs both pop out and fold. It puts its arms down and begins to lower its shoulder, which causes Chetney, who's clinging onto the back, to now be lifted up, almost standing on top of it.

TRAVIS: Yee-haw! (laughter)

MARISHA: Eight seconds.

TRAVIS: Eight seconds.

MATT: All righty, so it is groveling at the moment.

LAURA: Oh, I didn't have to use a spell slot for that. That's great, I forgot.

TRAVIS: I'm Dr. Strangelove, not Dr. Manhattan.

MATT: Don't have to use a spell slot for that?

LAURA: No, I did not.

TALIESIN: I'll wait 'til Launda's turn.

MATT: All righty, you're going to stay put or do you want to move?

TRAVIS: Riding the nuke?

LAURA: I'm going to stay right there.

MATT: You got it, all right, finishing that, comes to Chetney's go, with Orym on deck. Sorry, no. Laudna, with Chetney on deck.

MARISHA: I'm going to--

TALIESIN: I'm also going to say: Look out behind him! Specifically to you.

MARISHA: I'm going to hold my action until after Chet goes.

MATT: Okay.

MARISHA: See if he has a chance to disarm this guy and turn him off before I do anything. If he fails, then I'll hit him with a spell.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: I did say look out behind.

MARISHA: I will quickly, hearing that, glance over my shoulder. Do I see anything?

TALIESIN: Behind him!

MARISHA: Behind who? What?

LAURA: He's telling you to move!

TALIESIN: I said, "Look out behind him." That's all I said to you.

MARISHA: What, he's got flamethrower booty flames?

MATT: Take your turn, take your turn.

TALIESIN: It's going to be interesting.

MARISHA: Holding-- What are you talking about?

TALIESIN: Nothing, go ahead. Carry on, carry on.

LAURA: I think Ashton's going to do something that goes through him or something like that.

MARISHA: All right, I'll scooch over in here and then hold my action.

MATT: Into the broken tent over here?

MARISHA: Yes.

TALIESIN: That's a good--

MATT: There you go, you're hiding in a little tent.

TALIESIN: This might not work.

MATT: Finishing your go, Chetney, you're up, with Orym on deck.

TRAVIS: Nice, I'm going to try, and as he's now in the groveling position, go over, and I'm going to try and rake my claws up the sides of his arm where the runes are, and I'm going to try and take a swipe and see if it does any damage before I do my other two strikes.

MATT: You got it.

LAURA: You get advantage because he's prone, right?

MATT: Grovel knocks him prone, correct.

TRAVIS: Cool, okay.

TALIESIN: Nice.

MATT: Actually, I can do this--

TRAVIS: Kind of balls.

MATT: -- because it's fun, why not?

MARISHA: I thought that was bigger than it was.

LAURA: Yay!

TRAVIS: That's only a 17.

MATT: 17 does not hit.

TRAVIS: I'll try one more time.

MATT: It's too heavily armored.

TRAVIS: Crap rolls. That's better, 18.

MATT: 18?

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MATT: Does not hit.

TRAVIS: Damn!

MATT: It's too heavily armored. It's a big old armored beast.

TRAVIS: Oh yeah, I'm thinking of the other guy.

AHSLEY: Who's a big boy?

TALIESIN: Oh shit, this may not work. We'll find out.

TRAVIS: Fuck it, third one. That's way better. That one is a 23.

MATT: 23 does hit.

TRAVIS: Okay.

MARISHA: Damn.

TRAVIS: That's okay. Nine. 14 points of slashing damage against one of the arms, the runes.

MATT: That's including your rite?

TRAVIS: Yes.

MATT: Okay. You strike up the side. Your claws dig past the metal, carving up along. As it happens, the runes flare and glow, and you see you've definitely raked damage across its armored form. You're uncertain if it had any necessary effect on the capabilities of it.

TRAVIS: Okay.

MATT: But from where you're standing here, you're hitting the armor that is the outer shell meant to defend itself, so you're carving through the armor, doing damage to it.

LAURA: He's trying to destroy the runes specifically, is what you were trying to do?

TRAVIS: The runes on the arm, yeah. Great. Can I leap off and go right here?

MATT: You got it.

TALIESIN: Not going to be in my way, are you?

TRAVIS: I don't think so, unless you have cone shit.

TALIESIN: It'll be fine.

TRAVIS: Okay.

MARISHA: I'm holding my action so the moment that Chetney jumps off, which is good, I'm going to, seeing what he's doing, blast two Eldritch Blasts in his face.

MATT: Right up the butt?

MARISHA and LAURA: Right up the butt!

TRAVIS: None of my Blood Hunter shit works because it doesn't have blood.

MARISHA: Oh, and he's prone.

MATT: Yes, you have disadvantage on these attacks.

MARISHA: I have Spell Sniper.

MATT: That's true, so it's just a straight roll.

MARISHA: Just a straight roll.

MATT: Yeah--

MARISHA: I'll use both of these then for the two rolls because that's a 17 and 12. So, I got 20, seven, 24 on the first one.

MATT: Uh-huh.

MARISHA: And 19 on the second.

MATT: The first one hits.

MARISHA: First one hits, so a 19 doesn't hit.

TALIESIN: Wow, 19 is a no.

SAM: Dang.

MARISHA: Wow.

TALIESIN: Good to know.

MARISHA: Wowsers.

ASHLEY: Dang.

MATT: One of them scatters off the side of its armored body. The other one--

SAM: That would be really bad if you were there.

MATT: -- impacts right where its rear would be.

MARISHA: That's great. You watch the metal dent in slightly.

TALIESIN: Damn.

MARISHA: Rolled good though, 13 damage.

MATT: 13 damage. All righty.

MARISHA: That is good for Laudna.

MATT: Great. This finish your turn? Oh, actually, no, that was you holding your action, so you're good there.

MARISHA: It was me holding my action, so yeah, that finished my turn.

MATT: Orym, you're up.

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: It's on the ground, its arms down before you, its knees bent before (impact) (metal squeaking) this impact of metal behind it.

LIAM: Okay, I think I'm going to keep it simple. All it's done so far is belch fire out of its guts, right?

MATT: Correct.

LIAM: It hasn't even made a physical attack.

LAURA: (laughs bleakly)

LIAM: So, I'm going to leap this way and slash, and then leap and slash, so it'll be, jump, (slash) as I go.

TALIESIN: Mm.

MATT: All right.

LIAM: Actually, I'm going to go over by Imogen, and stand in front of her, between it and the creature.

MATT: All right.

LIAM: First hit is a... it's a 20.

MATT: 20 just hits.

LIAM: Ah.

LAURA: Okay.

MARISHA: 20 is the magic number. Damn.

TALIESIN: Good to know.

LIAM: That's a nine for damage, and the second slash is higher, 25.

MATT: That hits. Roll damage a second time.

LIAM: That is 12 damage.

MATT: All righty.

LIAM: Unless I see this guy throwing punches, I don't want to waste Bait and Switch, because the AC won't come into it, and I'm going to stand in front and soak up damage, hopefully instead of Imogen.

MATT: You got it. You leap, strike twice on it back, and then lift off when the second strike, land, shield in front of you, guarding Imogen. You can see it's on the ground and starting to reformulate its positioning, shrugging off the impact of Imogen's spell, but it's looking hurt.

LIAM: Is it--

MATT: Definitely starting to show some wear.

LIAM: Would those have been at advantage since it's down? I can't remember--

MATT: Yes, they would've been, because it was prone.

LIAM: Let's see if I get any natural 20s. No, no. Okay, thanks.

MATT: But no, good looking out. All right, finishing your go, that brings us to Ashton, with it on deck.

TALIESIN: All right, I'm going to run full speed directly at it--

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: -- and take a big swing. Let's see how this happens.

LAURA: At advantage.

MARISHA: Are you going to use your new toy?

TALIESIN: I'm going to use a toy, so. 16, 25. So, I start flickering as I'm moving, running, screaming straight towards him with a bat, and I take the swing, and it's like a ripple effect through space as I nail him.

MATT: (energy charging up) (impact)

TALIESIN: I do-- Double checking, because this is new.

MATT: It's like Diablos in

TALIESIN: It's going to be great.

MATT: -- Final Fantasy VII where it's like (sizzling) (booms).

MARISHA: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

TALIESIN: I get to add another d6 to this. This'll be fun.

MATT: A reference for 12 of you.

TALIESIN: Oh, that's terrible.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

MATT: (like Taliesin) Oh, that's terrible.

LIAM: Oh my god, Ashton--

TALIESIN: That's 12 points of damage.

LIAM: -- that's terrible.

MATT: 12 points of damage.

TALIESIN: But it's actually less about the damage, and more that I get the hammer right up into it, and shove with enough speed that that thing goes back 15 feet.

LIAM: A huge thing?

MATT: That's right.

LIAM: Whoa!

LAURA: Whoa, really?

MATT: (thudding)

LIAM: With that giant glass hammer, that's cool.

MARISHA: Now I see why you wanted me to move.

MATT: As it tumbles back--

MARISHA: I'm glad I moved.

MATT: (thudding) It skids into the ground, I'll say it does fall over the edge another the 10 feet, which does deal six points of bludgeoning damage to it.

SAM: Hey.

ASHLEY: Nice.

TALIESIN: Still prone, isn't it?

MATT: Still prone.

TALIESIN: Back to prone, possibly.

MATT: Well, it hasn't even gotten up yet.

TALIESIN: Okay, yeah. Yeah, and I'm going to stay where I am.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: And be a little smug.

TRAVIS: I get sneak attack because I rolled with advantage because I have one level of--

MATT: That's true.

TRAVIS: And I rolled a six on the d6, so.

MATT: Oh, look at that.

TRAVIS: Six points of--

MATT: You got it.

SAM: Hey, look at that.

MATT: It's starting to look pretty rough around the edges of its arms and armor.

TALIESIN: Oh, that was one hit, wasn't it?

MATT: Yeah.

TALIESIN: I'm going to-- I only have a few more feet of movement, don't I?

MATT: So, five, 10, 15, 20, 25 you have spent.

TALIESIN: 30, 35, 40, so I have, eh, you know what? I'll stay where I am.

MATT: Okay, so you hold up there.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: All right, that finishes your go. It is now the Warder's turn. It spends its action this turn finishing its groveling, and then at the end of the turn, it gets back up with its movement.

TRAVIS: Okay.

SAM: ♪ Over the Warderline ♪

TRAVIS: Does it groan when it does it, like it's, you know?

MATT: Yeah. (groan of metal fatigue) You can see at the edges of its armored plates, there's blue flickering on the inside-- (clicking)

TRAVIS: Ooh.

MATT: Where it's showing some wear and tear.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: It's going to (heavy footsteps) climb back up.

LIAM: Oh dang.

MATT: Get right back up to where it was angrily, but that's as much as it can do this turn.

SAM: Oh nice.

TRAVIS: Cool.

MATT: Yeah, because it only moved 20 feet, because half its movement had to be used getting up.

TALIESIN: Yep.

MATT: That finishes its turn. Imogen, you're up, with Laudna on deck.

TALIESIN: Ooh, it can run.

LAURA: All right.

LIAM: Look at him!

TALIESIN: Okay, good to know.

MATT: It's got a gait when it wants to.

LAURA: I'm going to use a sorcery point, and I'm going touch the ground, and through the ground, I'm going to Shocking Grasp him.

MATT: Ooh, all righty.

MARISHA: Hell yes.

LAURA: Hmm. I'll step up a couple feet so that I'm within range of that.

MATT: Of Shocking Grasp?

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: All right, into melee with him?

LAURA: I would have to be, wouldn't I? Because it's five feet.

MATT: Yep, yep.

LAURA: Hmm. Maybe I'll do something stronger than that, then.

MATT: It's up to you.

TALIESIN: I'm saving my real stuff.

LAURA: I know, I know. Okay, I'll do Shocking Grasp.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: Are we going to get a short rest at all before--

MATT: As it just begins to climb up the side of this edge, you rush up--

LAURA: Oh, natural 20! (cheering)

MATT: Double that dice.

MARISHA: ♪ Double that dice! ♪

LAURA: Whoo-hoo!

TRAVIS: (whistles)

MARISHA: Roll big.

LAURA: ♪ 2d8, one-- ♪

MARISHA: Big money.

LAURA: And two.

LIAM: Use the tower.

MARISHA: Come on.

LIAM: Yeah!

LAURA: Oh! Two sevens, 14 times two is--

ASHLEY: Ooh!

LIAM: Woo! 28.

MATT: 28 points of damage.

ASHLEY: Wow.

MARISHA: Yeah!

MATT: (clicking) As it shocks through its body, its fists fall to the ground again, and it picks one up. "(grumbles)" Boof. It's having a hard time keeping itself standing currently.

MATT: You see the inside of its armor, the gaps (electrical shocks). That finishes that attack.

LAURA: Yeah, five feet would've put me within a range of it, melee range of it, right?

MATT: Correct, and you're right in melee range.

LAURA: So, yeah, I'm not going to have used a sorcery point on that, that's a straight-up touch spell. I'm just going to go with that.

MATT: Okay.

LAURA: Oh, and it can't make reactions for the rest of his turn, right? Shocking Grasp does that?

MARISHA: Correct.

MATT: Yep.

LAURA: Great, then I'm going to use the rest of my movement to get away from it.

MATT: All right, which direction?

ASHLEY: Nice.

MATT: Back into the tent, or?

LAURA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Keep that cone in mind.

MATT: Duck over to the side with the tent. That's 15 feet there, 15 feet back, you got it.

TALIESIN: From five to 10.

MATT: Yep.

MATT: That finishes your turn.

LAURA: Okay.

MATT: Laudna, you're up.

MARISHA: Still having rubber chicken Pâté on, and who just got electrocuted--

MATT: (clicks) "(groans)"

MARISHA: I'm going to take, and be like: Hold on! And do the same thing, and do a Shocking Grasp as well, right into it because I get advantage, and this guy is beefy. So, keeping that electricity going.

TRAVIS: This guy's beefy.

MARISHA: Ooh, that's good, that's good. That's a natural 16 plus seven, so, that hits.

MATT: Go ahead and roll damage.

MARISHA: Then, come on, let's roll big.

LIAM: ♪ La-dee-da-dee-dah ♪

MARISHA: Gah. Damn, seven and one for eight electricity damage.

MATT: Eight points electricity damage. How do you want do this? (cheering)

MARISHA: What?! I've not one get one of these, have I got one? I don't know, it doesn't matter.

MATT: This is through Pâté, by the way, who's like, "Don't worry, I've got it, I've got it!"

TRAVIS: That's so epic.

MARISHA: I imagine Pâté barely hanging on as his hair is all fried, and he's just a full cartoon, like a "Looney Tunes" cartoon after being, you know, electrocuted by Imogen. Then we're going to take that electricity that Imogen pumped into him, and basically reignite it--

LAURA: Yes!

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MARISHA: And harness it right back into him as opposed to it dissipating.

MATT: See the energy travels up the body.

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: Then acting like a lightning rod.

MARISHA: Yes.

MATT: (hisses) Pâté pulls in and goes, "Oh shit!" (impact) It releases again. (crackling) Across its body as it, its fists are on the ground, it picks up once more, like (heavy impacts). Looking down at Ashton and Orym, pulling its fists back, and then the second blast hits, and then it (impact) (creaking).

LAURA: Oh, backwards!

MATT: Falls back.

LIAM: Tuck and roll!

MARISHA: Augh!

TRAVIS: (low-pitched groan)

MATT: (whooshes) (impacts) Onto the ground, all the metal comes to a rest. With that, the combat comes to an end as well.

SAM: I want the suit. Get inside, use it as Voltron!

TRAVIS: Check that box! I'm going to go try and get the digs off the guy that fell in the tent, because I need a new outfit.

MATT: Okay.

LIAM: Orym's going to immediately leap to the top of that tent, and look around, keeping low, and see if anyone see saw, heard, is anyone coming?

MATT: Okay, make a perception check with disadvantage.

LIAM: Oh, with disadvantage?

LAURA: Ooh.

LIAM: That's-- Stupid tablet device. That is a 19.

MATT: 19. Okay, you glance around the space, you can see they're-- You can see the basic shape in the distance of another one of those Warders walking the perimeter. Some, a few other figures that are just doing their own watching, but none of them quite within proximity of where you are.

LIAM: No reactions.

MATT: You do see some distant lines of dust from other crawlers way out on the perimeter, also doing their circle passes. That's what you see.

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: Imogen.

LAURA: Yes.

MATT: Make a strength, so, make an athletics or acrobatics check for me, if you don't mind.

LIAM: What's going on?

LAURA: Hmm.

TRAVIS: There's somebody in the fucking tent.

LAURA: Oh, probably. That's just 10.

MATT: 10.

MARISHA: Son of a bitch.

MATT: As it falls, you take a breath, and then suddenly feel something clamp around your throat, and you're pulled back into the tent. Nobody else notices, it happens so rapidly. You make a perception check for me, if you don't mind.

TALIESIN: That will be--

MATT: You and Chetney both.

TRAVIS: Yeah, and I was going to head there to get his clothes, because I need larger size digs now that I'm--

MATT: Uh-huh.

LIAM: What about Orym on top of the tent with his ridiculous passive?

MATT: She's below, oh, you're on top of the tent, and this happens below, and out of sight.

LIAM: I don't hear anything?

MATT: You do not.

LIAM: All right.

TALIESIN: 18.

TRAVIS: Yeah, same.

MATT: Well, I say, you do hear movement, shifting around on that side. What was it again?

TALIESIN: 18.

MATT: 18.

TRAVIS: Same.

MATT: Okay, you both watch as Imogen is standing there, just vanishes into the tent.

TRAVIS: (fast footsteps)

TALIESIN: I'm not going to run, but yeah, I'm walking up.

LIAM: I would slide down, too, if I heard any kind of movement.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: You heard them all moving in that direction. You don't-- I would say your passive perception hears movement, but there's nothing about it that sounds--

LIAM: Right, but if I heard movement, that means someone who's not us, so I would go down to inspect.

TRAVIS: I just don't want her to find the good stuff before we do.

TALIESIN: I'm going to--

LAURA: (laughs)

TALIESIN: -- peek not through the door of the tent, but through one of the lining, the points where you can actually stretch and look.

MATT: Okay, so, as you guys dart in, Imogen, you feel yourself pulled back, full-on choke hold on the throat. A voice in your ear goes, "Who are you, and why are you fighting the Vanguard?"

LAURA: Oh, wait, did I recognize that voice? Did I recognize the voice?

MATT: No, you don't recognize the voice at all. You keep being pulled back behind a row of crates, and supplies that are stacked up in here, and get dragged, and held to your feet, being pulled down, do you resist at all? What do you do?

LAURA: In their head, they're going to hear: I've got friends coming in. Are we friends or enemies?

MATT: "I asked you first," as they pull you down below, so they're out of sight. Just as the three of you get to the front of the tent, and look in, and see no sign of Imogen.

LAURA: The question isn't why, it's are you fighting, too?

MATT: Make a persuasion check.

LAURA: Oh, that's terrible, absolutely terrible. Seven. These dice never do well for me. This whole set needs to go away.

LIAM: While this is happening, Orym would, to these two, go: Someone's in here.

LAURA: No, just not here right now.

MATT: Okay, are you all doing anything?

TRAVIS: I come in and (sniffs).

LIAM: Entering.

TRAVIS: If we don't see Imogen, I would try and smell.

MATT: Make a perception check with advantage.

TRAVIS: Okay. Ah, that's only 11.

MATT: 11.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

MATT: You're not picking up anything particular.

TRAVIS: What the fuck?

LIAM: Orym's entering--

MATT: Like she just vanished.

LIAM: -- sword up because he heard a person in here.

MATT: Mm-hmm. What are you doing, Laudna?

MARISHA: I don't know, don't know what the fuck's going on, so I'm going to be like: Everybody's going in the tent, and slowly-- (laughter)

MATT: Okay, so you start climbing up to that point. You start being pulled back to the very edge of the tent, and then quietly pulled out of the tent just as they're approaching, from underneath.

MARISHA: Would I see, because I'm there--

MATT: You're there, but you said you're stepping up this way.

MARISHA: But I--

LAURA: Aw, just missed it.

MATT: That's why I was asking. As you get pulled out the back of this tent, and brought down the side of this mountain, rock by rock, very deftly, you're being held, and (footsteps). Jump down step by step, and then held once more. They're still talking in your ear, even though you're talking in their head. They're like, "Who are you with?"

LAURA: I'm going to use Command.

TRAVIS: What, what--

LAURA: And just say: Release.

MATT: Okay. "Is that how we're going to do this?" You feel a flick in the back of your shoulders. I need you to make a wisdom saving throw for me.

MARISHA: Come on.

SAM: Ooh.

MATT: Let me check one thing, I don't think it's wisdom. Let me double check.

MARISHA: Does this help with the new circlet, does the circlet help?

LIAM: Does the tiara do anything?

LAURA: I don't know.

LIAM: Only he'll know.

MATT: Sorry, I'm double checking one thing real fast.

TRAVIS: Sounds like they're fighting them, too. You could just tell them.

MARISHA: I don't, yeah. You would've joined in--

MATT: It's constitution.

LAURA: Constitution?

MATT: Yeah.

LAURA: That's way better. That's a 19.

SAM: Ooh!

MATT: A 19. You feel your muscles in your back begin to seize up, ugh, and then you, push through it slightly, but it's still causing your body to-- It's not a pain more than just everything is fighting against the action, the activity you're putting behind it, but you manage to push through it a little bit. The voice goes, "Ah, shit."

LAURA: Godsdamn it, if we're fighting the same thing, let us talk to each other face to face.

MATT: The figure spins you around, grabbing the edge of the cloak, and immediately holds a fist, and right up under your chin, and just, you hear the dark shadow says, "Any sudden moves, break your neck, you hear me?"

LAURA: Any sudden moves?

MATT: You see a female figure in this hood that's up, and pulled in the front, darker brown skin, long sleeveless robes, and looks to be a staff affixed across the back of the shoulders.

MARISHA: (laughs)

SAM: What?

LAURA: Are you Beau? Is it Beau?

ASHLEY: (gasps)

MARISHA: Is it Caleb and Beau?

LAURA: Why is Caleb and Beau?

MARISHA: (laughs)

SAM: The best characters.

LAURA: Best characters. (laughter)

MARISHA: She will break your fucking neck.

MATT: Who else is following Ludinus' trail?

ASHLEY: Is this my fucking wife?

LAURA: Oh my god, oh my god!

MARISHA: (hyperventilating)

TRAVIS: Hey.

TALIESIN: Hey.

TRAVIS: Maybe you could have two different characters (suggestive noises).

ASHLEY: Oh, oh, oh, oh!

LAURA: Oh! Oh!

ASHLEY: It's already happening up here. It's fun times.

MATT: "So, Who are you and what's going on?"

TRAVIS: Be disloyal with yourself.

MATT: "Before I break your pretty little neck." (laughter)

TALIESIN: At this point, I'm going to--

LAURA: We're the Bells Hells, and we're trying to keep them from releasing whatever's up there.

TRAVIS: What the fuck just happened?

MATT: "(sighs) Okay. Okay."

LAURA: Who the hell are you?

MATT: "Someone on a similar path, it seems." Cracks her knuckles a bit and backs up a little bit. Releases you but still keeping a close eye.

MARISHA: (laughs)

MATT: "Can they be trusted?"

LAURA: Yeah.

ASHLEY: I'm so mad about that.

MATT: "I'll kill you."

LAURA: I trust them with my life.

MATT: "Fine. Call them over."

LAURA: We've got company.

TALIESIN: What the fuck?

TRAVIS: (snarls)

LAURA: Friendly. So far.

LIAM: Was that mental or verbal?

LAURA: Well, I can't mentally call out to all of you.

TALIESIN: That's fine.

TRAVIS: We'll poke our head out the tent.

LIAM: We're at the back of the tent by now. We were searching it all that time.

MATT: You guys have been searching, looking through the tent, and then you hear that voice from the other side of it.

LIAM: Orym slashes the back of the tent so we can walk out.

MATT: It opens up and you all step out and you see this woman. Hood up, long vest, robes, clutching the side of Imogen's collar of her outfit and holding her in front of her like a shield and says--

LIAM: Easy.

MATT: "Easy, you too."

TRAVIS: (growls) She looks like an asshole. (laughter)

MARISHA: Yeah. Yeah. (laughter)

LIAM: You all right, Imogen?

LAURA: (hesitantly) Yeah. Mutual paths. Mutual goals.

MATT: "Maybe we should talk somewhere a little more private." She looks over and you can hear the descending footsteps of one of the nearby crawlers, like (mechanical footsteps) in the distance and releases you and gives you a little shove up the side of the mountain to get back into the tent.

LAURA: Before I do that, I'm going to use my Telekinetic Hand and take the tent and try to move it over the fallen robot to try to camouflage it, you know? So it's not just a big metal hump, it's the tents.

TRAVIS: Which tent? The one that we're all in?

LAURA: No, the one that fell.

LIAM: That one flew, yeah.

MATT: Yeah.

LAURA: So that it just--

MATT: Looks like it got blown over?

LIAM: Covers him a little bit.

LAURA: Covers him.

MATT: Covers him?

LAURA: Blocks him from people looking out from the outside. Yeah.

MATT: Okay.

SAM: Totally natural.

MARISHA: Sure. (laughter)

MATT: Totally fine. It's great, it's great. (laughter)

ASHLEY: Great stuff. (laughter)

LAURA: In my head, it blocked the view.

LIAM: Yeah, you want--

MATT: I get it, I get it, I get it, I get it. There you go.

LAURA: Yeah, so it created-- People driving by wouldn't automatically see a fallen robot.

TRAVIS: He's sleeping.

MATT: I feel you. (laughter)

LAURA: He's covering his eyes from the sun.

TALIESIN: He got hit by a farmer's market, I don't know. (laughter)

MARISHA: It's called a face mask.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: Jumps into the tent, looks at the rest of you. Kind of aggressive in energy and there is a wariness but also like a, I don't know, an ease or confidence of not feeling too threatened by your presence at the moment.

TRAVIS: It's pretty fucking ballsy to be-- (beastly) Are you by yourself?

MATT: "Why would I be by myself?"

MARISHA: Is the dirt wizard here?

MATT: You don't see a dirt wizard around here.

LAURA: Oh my god.

MARISHA: But is the dirt wizard here?

TRAVIS: (beastly) You keep an eye on her.

LIAM: Orym walks--

TRAVIS: I got to change.

LIAM: -- under Imogen's--

TRAVIS: I go through the body and start putting the outfit on.

MATT: Okay.

TRAVIS: Or stripping the body.

LIAM: Orym silently walks under Imogen's legs and stares up at this woman and just fronts.

LAURA: How long have you been on this path?

MATT: "What? This particular path?"

LAURA: Yeah.

MATT: "I don't know, a decade. How about you?"

LAURA: Not that long.

MATT: "Huh. Get behind."

LAURA: We have reinforcements. Do you?

MATT: "More or less. Timeline's been kind of truncated as of late."

LAURA: Have you been down there?

MATT: "Loosely, partially."

LIAM: Sum it up. What are you here to do?

MATT: "Here to stop, destroy, and fuck up whatever it is down in that in that hole and if possible beat the shit out of Ludinus' pretty face. Take him back to prison."

ASHLEY: She's so hot.

LAURA: Back to prison?

MATT: "That's where he belongs. He can go say hi to the rest of his friends if he were there."

LAURA: I would love to see that.

MATT: "Good." As she's conversing, she's saying things out there, but is reading each of you quickly, front to back. Just taking a read. Rapidly.

TRAVIS: I'm chewing on the dead guy's arm. (snarfing)

MARISHA: I'm--

MATT: "You're weird. Who are you?"

MARISHA: (laughing nervously) Oh. I'm Laudna. That's Chetney.

MATT: "You brought your dog with you?"

TRAVIS: (mouth full) Pleasure.

MARISHA: He's--

TRAVIS: Pleasure. (laughter)

MARISHA: Yes, he gets a little hungry sometimes, but he's quite a loyal dog.

TRAVIS: Wolf.

MARISHA: Wolf.

TRAVIS: What the fuck?

MATT: "Yeah, fine. Sure, whatever works. Look-- I'm not usually in the habit of bringing people into danger, but you seem to have walked your way here and maybe we could help each other out. Kind of ballsy to roll up as deep as you have been given the kind of quieter nature, the subtle touch this should require." She glances past. It's like she's looking for something, and goes, "You got my back?" You watch as a--

MARISHA: Bro.

MATT: -- a shimmer falls from the front of the tent--

MARISHA: Bro.

MATT: -- Where you see a--

LAURA: The dirt wizard!

MARISHA: Dirt wizard.

MATT: -- a figure in a coat with a higher collar and a long scarf--

TRAVIS: Get the fuck out! Get the fuck out of here! What is happening?

MARISHA: (laughs)

TRAVIS: You got to be shitting me!

LAURA: I love it! I love it!

SAM: Just covered in feces.

MATT: Just smeared, no.

TRAVIS: Not one but two?

TALIESIN: We're so fucking--

TRAVIS: Two?!

LIAM: Just climbs out of shit like in "Predator." (laughter)

TRAVIS: Come on, man!

MATT: This long duster that itself has been pelted by the same dust and dirt that the storm has, giving it a similar coloration to it. But a reach, a deep purple scarf that's put around. You can see him with a bit of chin scruff and wild, brown hair with a bit of gray touch on the sides. Hands gloved and hands out in front where you can see flames flickering and encircling around the outside. He goes, (German accent) "I would recommend that all of you--" (laughter)

MATT: "-- stay seated. Let us have a conversation."

LIAM: Flames!

LAURA: Side of my face.

MATT: "So, what's the play here, Beauregard?"

TRAVIS: (spits laughter)

MATT: She goes, kind of leans back a bit on one of the boxes here. Looking more casual at this point than ever before and goes--

LAURA: I wish you guys were here.

ASHLEY: Me, too. Me, too.

MATT: (Beau) "I don't know, maybe we could use a distraction, you know what I mean? This may be some good fortunes. What do you think?" (faint offscreen screaming) (laughter)

MARISHA: Oh, is that--

LAURA: It was Dani?!

LIAM: It was Dani! (laughter)

TRAVIS: I thought that Kyle was going out the back door.

ASHLEY: I was like--

LIAM: I was like, is that a sound effect in the music?

ASHLEY: A little bit of a delay.

LIAM: No, it's Dani Carr. (laughter)

MATT: (Caleb) "You are the ones responsible for this?" Motions to the outside.

TALIESIN: I mean...

MATT: "You seem fairly capable."

MARISHA: To be fair, we meant to come in very stealthy as well, that was the plan until we had that big boom.

MATT: (Beau) "Yeah, did a great job of that so far."

MARISHA: Well, you know.

LAURA: Well, we-- We had run into another one of them in Yios and they spotted some of our friends.

LIAM: Who are you two? You're not Grim Verity, are you?

MATT: They look at each other. "We're--" (Caleb) "We are not-- We're friends to the Verity, you could say."

LAURA: Do you know Ryn?

MATT: "Ja, we--"

LAURA: Do you know she was taken?

MATT: "(sighs) We came here with Ryn."

TRAVIS: Damn, they've been here a minute.

MATT: "We were trying to get as much reconnaissance as we could from the inside. Unfortunately, they grew distracted and one of the various glyph wards went off and we lost her. We hope to get her back but it was-- This is too important, and I think she would've agreed. So we're just-- Been biding our time and trying to watch for patterns, do the best we could to strike before all of this goes down."

LAURA: You seem capable. If we get to her in time, will you be able to--

MATT: "Not myself, but we have acquaintances that might able to."

LAURA: All right.

MATT: "Regardless. How much do you know about what's happening here?"

LAURA: Quite a bit.

LIAM: Quite a bit.

MATT: "We are on the cusp of a very dangerous event. There have been many terrible dangerous things happening around the world with the solstice. Ritual sacrifices, summonings. Everyone with an ounce of magical talent and dubious morals is looking to seize this opportunity." The one named Beauregard goes, (Beau) "Some of these threats are very real, while some, as we surmised, have been distractions. The Elder Cross Cult, The rise of the Carrion Breach, The Children of Malice splinter tunneling the Divine Gate. Reports have been coming in within the last week that all these are just fronts connected to the Vanguard." Caleb steps forward and kneels down a bit to make an eyeline with some of the shorter members of the team.

TRAVIS: I'm a big wolf, motherfucker.

LIAM: I'm just a wee man.

MATT: Yeah.

LAURA: Just a wee man.

ASHLEY: I'm just a wee man.

MATT: (Caleb) "We've been following Ludinus for many years, gathering scraps, proof, anything we can to take him and his inner circle down. But he's very clever. Far more clever than even I gave him credit for." Beau goes, "Nothing pisses me off more than someone being steps ahead, especially when they have such a punch-able face." (Caleb) "He knows we are coming."

LAURA: Great.

MATT: "We've," he refers to him and Beauregard. "We've been an inevitability for him for some time. How well does he know you?"

LIAM: Doesn't really.

LAURA: We've had run-ins. Otohan Thull.

MATT: "Mm."

LIAM: You know that name?

LAURA: And my mother is working with him.

MATT: "I know Ludinus has worked with these two generals under him. Exaltant, the Verity shows us, is a serious threat as well as this war hero, Thull, you mention."

MARISHA: Your mother's a general?

LAURA: Maybe.

LIAM: He was referring to the Exaltant to--

MATT: Mm-hmm.

LIAM: Okay, got it.

MATT: "You said your mother works with him?"

LAURA: Yeah. I pull my hood back.

MATT: Jaw tenses as he chews with his clenched mouth and gives a nod and Beau goes, "Shit, are we fighting your mom?"

LAURA: Potentially, yeah.

MATT: "Cool if we kill your mom?"

LAURA: I'd rather you not. I'd rather she help us. I don't know if that's still a possibility, though.

MATT: "But you think she can help us?"

LAURA: For a long time, she tried to keep me away from all this. Only recently she seems committed to the cause. Makes me think that Ludinus did something.

MATT: She looks over towards Caleb and gives a breath. (Caleb) "(sighs) Well. If you think she can help, then you lead the way to that. But understand that if she becomes a threat--" Beauregard kicks in. (Beau) "We'll have to neutralize her. We'll try not to kill her. Sometimes I got to punch things real hard."

LAURA: All right. We have friends on the outside that are waiting for a signal to come in.

MATT: (Caleb) "How soon are they coming?"

LAURA: As soon as we call them.

LIAM: Kind of waiting on our word.

LAURA: They're about an hour outside.

LIAM: And they're heavy hitters.

MARISHA: We sort of had this real big plan with a skyship with a bomb.

LAURA: Yeah, we have a skyship, but then we saw another skyship that had been crashed a little bit further out.

MARISHA: Is that a bad idea?

LIAM: Oh shit, did you see that happen?

MATT: (Caleb) "Yeah." She goes, (Beau) "Yeah, that shit was crazy. We tried to go to Vasselheim, originally, to try and give them proof about this whole thing."

LAURA: Yeah, that's what--

MATT: "Proof is hard to produce. It's hard to just go to them with an idea without any sort of real tangible evidence behind it and-- People don't want to take a chance on the Assembly and they're focused on proven threats, interested in covering their own asses. The Verity certainly riled them up and brought them down south here and I think they began to send a group that finally got word of what was going on and well. Didn't go that well."

LAURA: Do they have abilities to take down skyships? Is that--

MATT: The scarfed figure goes, "Well, they certainly-- Certainly struck it from the sky. But that was at Ludinus' behest. I haven't seen him-- We haven't had any sign of him being here for a number of days from our watch, our posts. It would've been difficult for us to go back in since they've installed this perpetual ripple."

LAURA: Mm.

TALIESIN: So this isn't a side effect, this is actually deeply intentional?

MATT: The one called Beauregard sits up. "Yeah, they brought a bunch of new supplies in and they've been making some changes.

TALIESIN: Ah.

LAURA: Yeah, that's probably our fault.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

MATT: "How so?"

LAURA: We took out one of the keys that was in the Fey Realm.

LIAM: Did you know there was a key in the Fey Realm?

MATT: "No shit." Looks over at the other figure, the scarfed figure, he goes-- "We just returned from--"

MARISHA: They were part of Shadowfell team.

MATT: -- "the Shadowfell, trying to take out another one of these keys. Unfortunately, we were able to damage it, but I do not believe enough to entirely stop its capabilities before we had to flee."

LAURA: Mm.

TRAVIS: Too bad.

LAURA: Should have blown it up. We blew ours up, just destroyed it.

MATT: "Yeah, well, maybe it's because you blew yours up, that we had a hard time with ours. I mean, like--"

TRAVIS: I'm sure that's what it was. Sure.

TALIESIN: That sounds right.

MATT: "You shut the fuck up, Wolfie." (laughter)

LAURA: Hey, it's her!

LIAM: Hey, it's her! (laughter)

ASHLEY: Hey!

MARISHA: Oh my god, no!

MATT: It's so weird.

MARISHA: It's so fucking weird.

LAURA: Look at those guns, dude.

MARISHA: Does it say "dope monk shit"?

LIAM: Yeah.

LAURA: Dope monk shit!

MARISHA: (laughs)

LIAM: Yeah, that's a real magazine.

TALIESIN: Wolfie. All right.

TRAVIS: After I've gotten all the clothes off, and they're all talking, can I search the tent, belongings, things, anything like a signal or anything that might come into-- be of use?

MATT: You can make an investigation check, if you'd like.

TRAVIS: I know what it is. 19.

MATT: 19. Looking around, you can see some small boxes of a dark metal, like sheeting, like armor plating, and it looks like it's been either partially forged or been repossessed from other things, just layers and layers of additional protection as well as general food supplies, like, you know, tack, dried meats and jerkies. It looks like a lot of it's been clean and moved, but there's some things that are slowly making their way in.

TRAVIS: Does the metal, as much as I hate it, look like something that you would normally see, or does it have a different hue, an alloy look, something unique about it?

MATT: It looks-- it looks kind of like, like a black iron, but it has a sheen to it that looks very, very strong.

TRAVIS: Cool.

MATT: The one with the scarf goes, (Caleb) "Well, if I guess we are on the same team, then introductions are in order. I am called Caleb Widogast. This is Beauregard Lionett, and we-- This is not the first individual of the Cerberus Assembly we've been up against, just the most dangerous, and the one that could topple it all if we succeed."

LIAM: You two here alone?

MATT: "Unfortunately, yes."

MARISHA: It was just the two of you in the Shadowfell?

MATT: Beauregard goes, "We had a couple others, but they-- other friends of the Verity, they unfortunately didn't, didn't make it out."

LIAM: We've been talking to these guys for a while. What's my vibe on their total class level?

TRAVIS: (laughs) You fucking self-serving son of a bitch! (laughter)

TRAVIS: Of course!

MATT: Higher than yours.

ASHLEY: Oh wow.

MATT: Higher than yours.

TRAVIS: "Higher than yours."

LIAM: Oh, they're level nine, you guys.

TRAVIS: Sure. (laughter)

TALIESIN: Just a birthday cake, and you just go right in. (laughter)

MATT: Says, (Caleb) "We've been able to hide up here for a bit, gathering info best we can. The entire site is illusion-proofed. Regular pulses of the dispelling energy radiate every minute on the dot." Beauregard says, "That was when Ryn almost made it to the bottom with us. They were relaying their findings, and we were halfway up, and we lost them when they were compromised." (Caleb) "And we will get them back! There was a mage hunter golem along the base of the device accompanying--"

LIAM: Mage hunter golem?

MATT: (Caleb) "It's a-- Well, one can assume from the name what its capable of."

TRAVIS: The pulses have been happening while we've been having this conversation, right?

MATT: You can eventually hear occasionally the (energy pulse).

TRAVIS: I'm still a wolf, right?

MATT: Yeah.

LAURA: But it's not hitting you. Right?

MATT: Yeah.

TRAVIS: It's moving through.

MATT: It seems to be localized. No, it's localized out of the top.

TRAVIS: Oh. Oh, okay.

MARISHA: So it's like a funnel?

LAURA: Only 10 feet above.

MATT: Yeah, you're not so close to the edge where it's hitting you yet.

TRAVIS: I don't know if mine's a magical effect or if it's something else.

MATT: No, yours is just a curse.

TRAVIS: Okay, cool.

LAURA: So when the waves hit, everything magic is just destroyed?

MATT: (Caleb) "No, it's not destroyed, just briefly subdued, but any sort of existing illusions or magical effects are rendered finished."

TALIESIN: Every 60 seconds.

LIAM: So between that and a mage hunting golem, I guess you're having some trouble.

MATT: "You could say that."

LAURA: Why don't you just put on some damn disguises?

MATT: "Well, (chuckles) we're not necessarily--"

TRAVIS: Smart. Beauregard goes-- (laughs) You hear the loudest cracking of knuckles you've ever heard in your life as Beauregard stands up, and now, in the light that you're seeing, taking it in, you can see with a flex the absolute absurd--

MARISHA: Yeah, she's shredded.

MATT: -- muscles that she has.

LIAM: Do you mean Marisha? (laughter)

MARISHA: Lot of protein.

MATT: (Beau) "No, we just don't want to run in and get killed immediately, like some people almost did. And we're maybe-- Our skills in deception aren't our strongest suits." (Caleb) "I rely on illusions to do such things, but it's, it's too dangerous with that cycle going. What we do know is the construction of the interior of the site is intricate. Ludinus has been plotting this for quite some time. Some reverse engineering Aeorian arcana and technology, building a stock of distilled dunamis for some use with the central key. There are a number of mesh-like power arrangements surrounding the device that I cannot get close enough to ascertain their specific purpose."

MARISHA: Yeah.

MATT: Beau leans in, "Don't get me wrong, I have my issues with divinity, but Ludinus is obsessed. Really started showing his hand through the Vanguard a few months back and almost intentionally, like he's counting on opposition, which really makes me uneasy."

TALIESIN: Quick question, would the word "dunamis" shake any of my subconscious weirdness, like crazy-ass dream shit or is it just not--

MATT: Not subconscious, the word doesn't catch you.

TALIESIN: Okay.

LIAM: I was about to say, what's dunabis? (laughter)

MATT: (Caleb) "Dunamis is-- (sighs)"

LAURA: I love it.

MATT: "There isn't time to lecture. Needless to say, it is a very obtuse form of magic that exists between the fabric of all other forms of power. It's one of the oldest and one of the most fundamental forces within Exandria and beyond."

LIAM: Okay.

MATT: "It has the capability of altering time, space, probability, empathy, entropy, I mean. It is dangerous in the wrong hands, and unfortunately, a very strong source of it has been in the hands of the Assembly and Ludinus for some time. Now, I'm afraid that our recent assault on the sister key has also led them to dividing and adjusting the equipment and the power of this central key. They've reinforced it, they separated other sources, buried them below ground or into nearby chambers within the surrounding walls. They know more is to come. They're expecting assaults."

MARISHA: Can we-- Okay, so shit's in the walls. It's in the goddamn walls. Can we rewind just a minute to the it's-like-Ludinus-is- counting-on-opposition theory? to the it's-like-Ludinus-is- counting-on-opposition theory? Can you unpack that a little bit more?

MATT: (Beau) "Yeah. He's not this sloppy. We've been-- We've been trying to nail this fucker to the ground for a long time, and he-- (sighs) He's always ahead. It fucking pisses me off. I don't know, there's just something about this stuff that seems a little too sloppy for his taste."

MARISHA: Do you think he's losing it a little bit? Starting not to think straight?

MATT: "I mean, he has been pretty close to some pretty dangerous magic for a while, wouldn't you say?" Caleb goes, "It wouldn't be the first practitioner of dangerous arts to eventually succumb to the proximity of such chaotic forces. But-- He seems to be operating outside of the Assembly on this. I have someone on the inside who has been unaware of his activities up to this point and nearly pushed too deep into his web before they had to back away. None of the others that we've investigated within the Assembly seem to be aware, or choose not to get involved in what he's doing out of fear. And to know so many powerful mages fear him is intimidating." Beauregard goes, "Oh bullshit! We fucked up Halas. We fucked up Trent. We fucked up Benathar. Just another mage to add to the tally. Right? Just (clicks) mark another tally piece." He goes, "Beauregard, I appreciate your gusto, but pragmatism has kept us alive this far. Anyway-- (sighs)"

TRAVIS: They fucked up Pat Benatar. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Did you hear that name?

LAURA: When are y'all planning to go in?

MATT: (Caleb) "Well, we were in the midst of finding gaps in between the sentries and try and see if we could leap from shadow to shadow using illusion between these bursts and see how close we could get, but to be honest, we were kind of hoping maybe Vasselheim was sending more reinforcements and we could use the distraction now that we were in a better place. But, well, what was your interest in entry?"

LAURA: Well, we were planning on sneaking in with these fabulous disguises that we're wearing.

MARISHA: They worked real good for about 10 minutes.

MATT: (Beau) "Yeah. Yeah, worked real well. Watched all that happen."

LAURA: We've only got the one person that recognized us, and they're dead now, so hm-- Outside of that, we have an airship that we were planning to send on in. We also have, what's her name? Keyleth, sorry, Voice of the Tempest, she's bringing in an army as well.

MATT: Beauregard goes like, "Oh, you're affiliated with Ashari folk."

LIAM: Hi.

TRAVIS: I fucking can't right now. (laughter)

MARISHA: It's a "Best of."

MATT: You guys made some entwined characters. (laughter)

LIAM: Yeah, let's game this out. Our initial plan, I don't know if we're going to stick with it because of the downed airship we saw, was to crash an airship into this thing, only after we extracted--

MATT: Beauregard's just laughing. "(laughs) That is batshit, I kind of love it," and looks over at Caleb, "When they took out that other one, that was a clear day, right?" Goes, (Caleb) "It was."

LAURA: That's what we're hoping for.

TALIESIN: Exactly what we were thinking.

MATT: (Caleb) "Depends on how long this lasts."

LIAM: We got a couple of friends in the sky waiting on our word. We've got the Voice of the Tempest waiting on our word. Our best case scenario is an extraction and then bringing the place down. Ryn, Imogen's mother.

MARISHA: The Ashari could be that big distraction that you were speaking of.

MATT: (Caleb) "It's an interesting thought."

TRAVIS: We're kind of on a clock.

LAURA: Yeah, if this storm clears out, a lot of our plan goes away.

MATT: (Beau) "All right, then. Well, you got your disguises. We can go ahead and try and take the opposite side here. If we can find a pattern through, maybe meet in the middle. I think traveling as a group is a little, uh-- I mean, you're already pushing it at your size."

MARISHA: Conspicuous.

TRAVIS: You were invisible. Could you spare one of those on one of this group?

MATT: (Caleb) "I can, but it only lasts but a minute within--"

TALIESIN: Oh--

MARISHA: Right.

TRAVIS: Just a minute?

TALIESIN: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Real powerful. (laughter)

MATT: "Look, I'm trying to find different ways of subterfuge, of sneaking into this unseen. If you feel confident in your disguises, and I hope you are, because we saw what happened when someone as powerful as Ryn was found out, and who knows when Ludinus is back, if he's not already."

TRAVIS: You've been here a while, have you been able to ascertain where that anti-magic pulse is coming from?

MATT: (Beau) "This is really fucking me up. Sorry, weird, I don't have a lot of pets talk to me. Seems like, from what we can tell, maybe it's from these, there's these mirror devices that are situated in the sides of the chasm, almost like a pattern of them. They seem to light up when it goes through." Caleb goes, "But we're not certain if they're what's emanating it or they're just reacting to it. There's a lot more to this cavern beyond just the central key spire. There's-- Ludinus put a lot of thought into this."

TRAVIS: A well-thought-out trap.

MARISHA: What keeps-- (stammers)

TRAVIS: Are you okay?

MARISHA: It's a weird day.

TRAVIS: Holy schreiver. (laughter)

MARISHA: You see, we have this friend who's kind of working with us. His name is Ira, or the Nightmare King, you may have heard of him. He's a little, little famous.

TALIESIN: Not in a good way.

MATT: Caleb shows no recognition, but Beauregard goes, "Okay--"

MARISHA: He's--

LAURA: Completely untrustworthy.

MARISHA: -- super cool.

TALIESIN: Going to stab us--

MARISHA: He's amazing.

TALIESIN: -- in the back any day now.

LIAM: Yeah, he's walking--

LAURA: But he wants to fuck over Ludinus, and that's the important part of it.

MARISHA: Correct.

LIAM: Walking chaos.

MATT: "So you do know he worked, you know he designed the initial--"

LAURA and LIAM: Yes.

LAURA: Yeah, we know.

MARISHA: Right! But!

MATT: "And you brought him here?"

MARISHA: Yes!

LAURA: Yeah, but he hates them, and he wants to destroy with all of his being.

LIAM: Yeah, he has no scruples, he's just looking to have a bit of fun, in our favor.

MATT: "You believe him? All of you feeling pretty confident?"

TALIESIN: I believe that part.

LAURA: I believe he wants to destroy it.

MARISHA: Big, old grudge, but he knows the inner workings of one of these things. But also, when we first met him, he was totally, like, abducting children and people to power one.

TRAVIS: Werewolves.

TALIESIN: She's got a weird thing going on.

TRAVIS: And werewolves.

MATT: Every muscle in Beauregard's body flexes at once as she gets this angry look on her face. "Cool. Great, great. Yeah, that's cool."

MARISHA: Oh, just, you know, we just use the information we already have.

TRAVIS: "Enemy of my enemy," and all that.

MARISHA: Yes!

MATT: "I get you, I get you. Where, where is he?"

LIAM: Well, he's part of sky team.

MARISHA: Yes.

MATT: "All right, so you got a skyship hiding up there somewhere with people on it."

MARISHA: Yes.

MATT: "You're going to crash it in. People are going to die with it? They--"

LAURA: They're going to jump off.

MATT: "They're going to jump off last minute, just kind of-- It's not--"

LAURA: Trust them.

LIAM: Yeah, it's taken care of.

MARISHA: Mm-hmm.

MATT: "(sighs) All right. Far be me to tell your friends how to fall properly."

LAURA: But we really should try to take out the anti-magic wave before that happens because--

MARISHA: That is probably a good idea.

LAURA: -- if they're trying to jump off and then the anti-magic wave hits them, they're not going to be able to--

TALIESIN: Oh shit.

LAURA: -- fall softly.

MARISHA: No, they're not.

TALIESIN: No.

LAURA: I'm not 100% certain that the ship could even get down into it in time. Also, aren't the bombs that we strapped to it arcane? Would they get dispelled?

TALIESIN: Only if they go off, I think.

LAURA: I don't know. It's not a permanent dispel, it's just for a minute. It doesn't work, or--?

TRAVIS: I think it renders it inert.

MARISHA: It poofs it.

LAURA: Inert for a little bit, and then it can come back?

MATT: It depends on what it is.

LAURA: Fuck.

MATT: Magical items go inert for a moment. You're uncertain what the effects are elsewhere. You do know that they're probably using arcane cores or adjacent based arcane power sources, but you don't know where they were placed and they've all been hidden in certain locations within this excavation. So who knows?

TRAVIS: The good news is an airship in free fall is going to make it in.

LAURA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: Yep.

MATT: "Regardless, we should try and disable what we can, preferably without everyone drawn towards the center. If any of this goes poorly, take out those that can warn the others."

LAURA: Yeah.

LIAM: Can you point us in the right direction to where the--

MATT: Beauregard goes--

LIAM: Just down.

TALIESIN: Oh, outside. That's good.

LAURA: Yeah. Yeah.

MARISHA: You said there were two sets of mirrors on opposite sides?

MATT: (Beau) "No. There's dozens of them, all on the inside, facing in towards the center of this spire and there's these four smaller, hook-like spires that are pointing towards it. I'm not quite sure what they're supposed to do." She gestures to Caleb and Caleb goes--

LAURA: (laughs)

MATT: (Caleb) "They've also reinforced everything with a mass amount of residuum and the veins run throughout the device. The extenuating spires, the walls of the actual interior of the excavation site itself and beyond. So we haven't gotten close enough to see where it goes and what is actually powering it. So an all-out assault, I think, would be far too dangerous without knowing what we're up against. So if our two groups can go in separately, I think they have a better chance and maybe we could--" He reaches into a pocket and pulls out a small stone and says, "If you have an important bit of information," looks over at you and tosses you a stone.

TRAVIS: (munches)

MATT: "Wait about eight hours." (laughter)

TRAVIS: (gags) Sorry.

LIAM: Good boy!

MARISHA: Oh.

MATT: "Let me know. Time is of the essence and we're wasting time."

LAURA: Out of curiosity, do you, per chance, have any ability to heal people? do you, per chance, have any ability to heal people?

MATT: "Nein."

LAURA: Great.

TRAVIS: Nice.

LIAM: Just nine of us? (laughter)

MATT: "There's only seven of you."

LAURA: (laughs)

TRAVIS: We lost two on the way over.

MATT: "I'm sorry to hear that." (laughter)

MATT: "I've lost a lot in my time, too." (laughter)

LIAM: Shit! What do we do about Fearne and Letters?

MARISHA: Maybe they should--

MATT: (Beau) "We can't leave that big old thing outside, just out in the open. That's an easy call."

LAURA: Yeah. How do we get rid of it?

TALIESIN: I was just going to pick up this tent and throw it on top of it, but if there's a better idea.

MARISHA: I mean, (coos) something Sam said, we Voltron it! (laughs)

SAM: Gut it, go inside it, walk around like Voltron.

MARISHA: That's not practical.

TRAVIS: Is it even possible?

MARISHA: No.

TRAVIS: Can that fit in the hole? It's too big for the hole, right?

LAURA: (sighs)

MATT: That's too big for the hole.

TALIESIN: We can trap it.

LAURA: I don't have the the amount of telekinetic ability to do that now.

SAM: Do we need it?

TALIESIN: We can trap it, at the very least.

MATT: You can inspect it and see what options you got.

TALIESIN: I mean, yeah.

LAURA: A couple people could do that, if we want to split the party up. I don't think all of us are going to fit inside of it, but--

TALIESIN: No. I was just saying maybe there's something in there worth--

TRAVIS: I don't think, as we move forward--

MARISHA: There's no way.

TRAVIS: Yeah, that we're going to have enough time to worry about somebody seeing that and raising the alarm.

TALIESIN: Yeah.

TRAVIS: We're going to be getting this shit fast.

LAURA: All right.

MATT: It's your call.

LAURA: But we should-- Let's at least try to do the tent.

TRAVIS: We made it to the lip of the sink hole.

LAURA: Yeah, I'm still going to--

TALIESIN: Actually, we got a--

LAURA: We should still try to move the tent over it.

TALIESIN: Have we got a second?

LIAM: We can use the other tent.

TALIESIN: Let's chop it up, put it in the tent.

LAURA: Or just move the tent.

TALIESIN: Or just move the tent.

MATT: Up to you guys. What are you doing?

MARISHA: Oh, big tent over top of it?

LIAM: We're going to pull the big tent over--

LAURA: Over top of it.

LIAM: -- and cover it up.

TRAVIS: Really?

TALIESIN: It'll fit. Or we can move it over to the bigger tent.

TRAVIS: It's going to look like two tents over a giant automaton!

TALIESIN: We're going to move the other tent--

SAM: What's over there, Jerry? Oh, it's just two tents! (laughter)

TRAVIS: Guys!

TALIESIN: We only need one tent for that thing.

LIAM: It'll buy us 10 extra minutes.

TRAVIS: (laughs)

MARISHA: Everyone pick a pole.

ASHLEY: You're not going to--

MATT: It's a pretty big hunk of metal, y'all.

TALIESIN: Okay.

TRAVIS: It's so big!

LAURA: All right, fine. Then fuck it.

TRAVIS: Leave it!

LAURA: What are we going to do?

TRAVIS: (laughs)

MATT: I mean, you can try. It'll take you a bit. To try and cover this--

LAURA: Plus, the dust storm is happening, so maybe it'll get dusty by the time--

TRAVIS: That's not the move.

MATT: You can take some time to try and do it.

TRAVIS: No. It's time to move.

LIAM: No. No. Ditch it.

LAURA: I feel like, if we're going to call in reinforcements, it's going to take them about an hour and a half to get here, so we should head down and start trying to take out this stuff.

SAM: 10 minutes.

LAURA: 10 minutes to get in?

SAM: 10 minutes.

TRAVIS: Yeah. They're a mile away.

SAM: One mile away. We go 10 miles an hour. It'll take six minutes to get there.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

LAURA: Never mind.

MARISHA: What? Can't we move it back a little bit and maybe dust some sand over it? I don't know.

MATT: It's real heavy. You can all try it together.

LIAM: I'm wondering when to punch the ticket on the Ashari.

MARISHA: Feels like we need to maybe take out, see if we can take out some--

LAURA: Of the anti-magic?

MARISHA: Yes!

TALIESIN: Do y'all idiots have an idea of what to do with that robot?

LIAM: I think so, too.

MATT: Beauregard looks at it and is like, "I don't know. Take it for scrap parts?"

TALIESIN: That was my thought. Want to try and--

MATT: Caleb goes over and takes a look at it for a second.

LAURA: Transmute it and put it--

LIAM: Send it away.

MATT: (Caleb) "The damage it sustained, it's still somewhat operational. It just doesn't have any sort of-- Looks like the the energy core inside has been damaged." Lifts, looks inside the hollow torso of it. "So either we can try and overcharge it, maybe it'll detonate, but that'll cause tension. I don't even know."

LAURA: I think going in--

SAM: I got to get inside of that fucking thing.

LAURA: Get inside of it is a--

SAM: I'll get inside that thing and fuck it up. (laughter)

TRAVIS: Did you say you would get inside and fuck it?

TALIESIN: There's no way to--

SAM: No, get inside and beat it!

TRAVIS: Oh, I know. Yeah.

TALIESIN: I don't know. Get it up and running and make it work for us.

LIAM: None of us of us here know how to activate that thing.

LAURA: No.

TALIESIN: No, we have somebody on the airship that can, no problem.

LAURA: But--

TALIESIN: I know.

MARISHA: We could just tell the other team that this is our location and see what happens. We could just wait.

LAURA: Can we look inside and--

TALIESIN: Just booby trap--

TRAVIS: We got a sandstorm going on!

MATT: You push past Caleb and look inside. There's that large doorway in the front. You lift it up inside and you can see--

TRAVIS: We're thinking too much!

MATT: -- there is the pipes for the flame thrower you saw that are submerged up in the top.

TALIESIN: Ow.

MATT: But it is a hollow chassis. It looks like it's both for defense and it's for cargo.

ASHLEY: Yeah.

MARISHA: Heats for cargo?

MATT: It looks like it's probably about a--

ASHLEY: I think we can use it. Get in it, get in it.

MATT: -- a 12- to 15-foot dome, side to side. You could fit quite a few people in there if you wanted to, you just have to figure out a way to get it to move if you wanted.

MARISHA: Oh my god! Are we actually going to Voltron this thing?

TALIESIN: I mean.

LIAM: These two can't do anything. Can you figure this thing out?

LAURA: I'll look around and see if I can--

SAM: Voltron, motherfucker!

TALIESIN: Would throwing some residuum in that thing?

MARISHA: I'll help Imogen.

LAURA: Figure out how to--

MARISHA: See what happens. (laughs)

LIAM: I'll form the head!

LAURA: Yeah. Can I see if I can figure out how to get it up and moving?

ASHLEY: That's one way to get right in.

LIAM: Charge it up.

MATT: Make an arcana check.

MARISHA and ASHLEY: Come on!

ASHLEY: Come on!

MARISHA: Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait! Can I do one as well? Because I want to help her.

LAURA: Yeah, you want to do one, too?

MATT: Sure. This is a very high DC.

MARISHA: Yes.

LIAM: Help us.

TALIESIN: I believe in you motherfuckers.

LIAM: Get a 20. Oh!

LAURA: (laughs)

LIAM: Bing!

LAURA: Ba-da-bing!

MARISHA: Nope.

LAURA: We don't know anything.

SAM: Two.

MATT: Nope. Logistically, the only person you know that has any sort of real understanding and/or a power core themselves is on the skyship.

MARISHA: FCG.

LAURA: Yeah. Well, I'll let FCG know that this is here. When they bring the skyship in, maybe they can jump down and--

LIAM: Sure, we'll just crash the skyship.

TALIESIN: That's actually a pretty good idea.

MATT: Okay.

TALIESIN: All right.

MATT: At this point, you hear (rhythmic thumping) as a crawler begins to careen ut of the dust storm, arcing in your direction. You quickly look around. Beauregard is gone. You don't even see her anymore. Caleb just turns invisible.

LAURA: Let's go down.

TALIESIN: All right, let's roll.

LAURA: We head down.

LIAM: Yeah.

MATT: So you just start moving?

LIAM:: Yeah.

MATT: As you do, the crawler (thumping) comes and skids and then comes to a stop. (authoritatively) "Hey! What happened here?"

LAURA: Having issues with the Warder. We're getting it back up and running.

MATT: Make a deception check.

LIAM: Come on, liar!

LAURA: 18. Nope, 20!

MATT: 20.

MATT: "Fucking things barely work at all! All right." (crawler powering away) Takes off into the storm.

LAURA: We hide the bodies in the tent.

MARISHA: 100%.

TALIESIN: Oh yeah.

MATT: All right.

MARISHA: Raid the tents, raid the bodies.

MATT: You you drag the bodies in, you gather what materials you need from them, recover any more costume pieces that you may require.

LAURA: Yeah.

TRAVIS: I take the guy's staff.

TALIESIN: Anything found on the bodies?

MARISHA: Mm-hmm.

MATT: Weapons and gear and a pouch of spell components.

TRAVIS: I took that whole dude's outfit, plus his staff. So I am wearing whatever he wore.

MARISHA: Yeah, we upgrade our outfits.

MATT: I'd say-- how long does your form last again?

TRAVIS: Only an hour and we've just been up here fucking talking and shit.

MATT: I'd say this conversation and everything here has been 30 minutes, 40 minutes or so.

TRAVIS: Yeah.

LAURA: Sorry, Chet!

MARISHA: Well?

LAURA: Let's head down.

TALIESIN: Let's roll.

MARISHA: Do we want to summon the others? Leave Xandis on the boat, that way he can still fly in when we're ready. But maybe we get Fearne and Chet and then we can figure out something with Xandis.

TALIESIN: I think it's good chaos at this point. I think that putting FCG in a giant robot body is a really wonderfully terrible idea.

LIAM: Are we going to trust Ira to babysit Xandis?

MARISHA: I would think Ira--

LAURA: Ira's going to abandon him in a heartbeat.

MARISHA: Ira comes.

TALIESIN: Ira comes.

MARISHA: Ira comes because when Xandis crashes that boat, Ira can get him off the boat.

LAURA: No, that's what I'm saying! Ira's not going to do that. You think Ira's going to save Xandis?

MARISHA: Yes.

LAURA: No, he won't.

MARISHA: Why not?

LAURA: If Ira's the only one left, Xandis is dying.

MARISHA: Well, Fearne can turn into a bird.

LIAM: If she's here, she's going to fly back?

LAURA: Let's just head down! Let's fucking head down!

MARISHA: Well, no. If we're all here, the boat falls, someone--

TRAVIS: I guess we'll find out!

LAURA: We'll call them in 10 minutes.

TALIESIN: Oh boy. Going for you.

MATT: Well. As you all discuss the next wave of your journey, you see, poking out of the nearby tent, Beauregard, looking off to the rest of your crew. (Beau) "We're going to circle around. Let us know when things go down. Good luck!"

LAURA: In her head, she hears: If anything happens in the next eight minutes, you can let me know.

MATT: She goes, "Ah, I really hate that! That's weird! Kind of cool, but also a little weird. All right." And then (whooshes) dart off through the rock and begins to start a perimeter. You have no concept of where Caleb Widogast is for a moment.

LAURA: I could always Send a message to FCG and say, come in 10 minutes. Head out in 10 minutes. That'll give us a little bit of time to get down and try to dismantle some of this shit.

MATT: Well--

LAURA: We'll figure that out?

MATT: I say let's go ahead and at the cusp of this moment of decision, to give you some time to consider the next step of your planning stage as you sit here at the edge of the maw of the Tishtan Excavation site with the (pulsing) ripples of interior Dispel Magic.

TRAVIS: Cover my junk.

MATT: As the gathering crackle of the auroras of the nexus grow brighter and brighter with each passing moment, the looming Apogee Solstice. Soon. Soon. And that's where we'll finish this episode.

TALIESIN: Yeah!

MATT: We'll pick up there next time.

TRAVIS: I can't believe--

TALIESIN: Motherfucker!

TRAVIS: I can't believe they showed up.

LAURA: That was so cool!

ASHLEY: (groans)

TALIESIN: That was so-- Oh god.

ASHLEY: That was so cool!

LAURA: I mean, it makes perfect sense that they would be!

ASHLEY: I'm so jealous! I would've flirted so hard!

LAURA: I know! (laughter)

MARISHA: Bitch, there's still time!

MATT: (laughs) There's still time.

ASHLEY: Bitch, there's still time!

MATT: You got to come down from the boat.

SAM: We could encounter other people, too! Kiri.

MATT: Just all of Campaign 2 is in the hole right now.

ASHLEY: Yeah. (laughs)

MATT: Yeah. No. I mean, it made sense for their narrative. They've allied with the Grim Verity, they've been involved in that whole shit in a whole nother realm. You guys aren't the only group that's been following these machinations.

TALIESIN: This is some big shit! This is some big shit!

MATT: Also, that series of rolls I had you two do last time informed their trip to the Shadowfell.

LAURA and ASHLEY: (gasp)

LAURA: Oh!

SAM: I don't even remember that.

ASHLEY: Oh my god!

TALIESIN: That's cool!

MARISHA: When it was just random d20s?

ASHLEY: Yes!

LAURA: Yeah!

MARISHA: Yeah, we didn't roll great.

MATT: No.

SAM: That's why you got people killed.

MARISHA: Oh shit! (laughter)

LIAM: We're the worst at Rollies!

LAURA: That's why it wasn't successful!

MARISHA: We're so bad at Rollies!

TALIESIN: You should take a Rollies class.

LAURA: Holy moly!

TALIESIN: Improve your Rollie game.

MARISHA: Holy moly, we're bad at Rollies!

LAURA: Rollies!

TALIESIN: Holy moly, we're bad at Rollies.

MATT: There it is!

MATT: But that being the case, we'll be back on this next week.

TALIESIN: Wow!

MATT: Thank you all so much for joining us. It'll be our anniversary episode next week.

SAM: Whoa!

LIAM: Whoa!

SAM: It's a special anniversary episode!

LAURA: Eight? Really is it eight?

MARISHA: It is!

MATT: Fucking hell! The timing is stupid! I love when it comes like this! Regardless, thank you all so much for joining us. We love you very much and is it Thursday yet? Good night!

ASHLEY: Not yet!